When I opened my eyes, I had to immediately squint them due to the bright intensity of the sunlight beaming down on my pale face.

What the hell was up with that, huh? Hong Kong's weather forecast called for cloudy with a chance of rain. Ergo, I didn't think to bring my sunblock with me! Well, at least I'm still wearing my contact lenses, otherwise I'd really be boned.

Wait a minute…Sunlight at 10 P.M.?

My photosensitive eyes eventually adjusted to the brightness, and I could see now that wherever I was, it probably wasn't anywhere near Hong Kong. The area had the same subtle nuances that would fit right into your stereotypical fantasy RPG town: medieval-style architecture, cobblestone roads, horse-drawn carriages, the works. People equipped with outdated clothes and tools casually walked and talked amongst the mainstream of citizens and vendors alike.

Wherever I was, all signs pointed to this place being nothing more than a pre-industrial, backwater society with no connection to the modern outside world. Whoop-de-do…

Then it hit me: the Saturday morning…the pudding cups…my embarrassing death…Purgatory, goddesses and reincarnation, oh my!

This wasn't some nowhere village untouched by time…This was a normal settlement located in an ENTIRELY. SEPARATE. UNIVERSE!

Unable to contain my inner geek, I laughed, "Hahahaha! Oh man, this is the bomb! I've always wanted to travel to a parallel universe! But all my particle accelerators never had enough horsepower to rip through the fabric of space-time, even with the Eye of Dashi as a battery!"

A distressing, high-pitched noise alerted me to the presence of someone standing right beside me. Oh yeah, it was that Aqua chick from before. Except now she was missing her pink scarf and her head was hanging low, causing her flowing blue hair to obscure her face at the moment.

Eh, not my problem. Anyway, time to begin my new, adventurous, and, most importantly, solo life in a foreign world! Just like an upcoming isekai protagonist! Or should I say...an upcoming isekai antagonist~? Huh~? Yeah.

"Seriously, this is just way too cool!" I babbled excitedly to myself. "Man, where do I even begin? Maybe go explore downtown for a bit? Or should I try my hand at chatting it up with the locals? I wonder if there's some kind of charisma skill tree for that? I'm not exactly the best at making conversation with something that isn't a machine. Oh, oh! I know, I know! I should make my first mark in this world by claiming this town as my new evil base of oper-ATIONS!?"

"BUAAAAAAAAAA-AHA-AAAAAAAAAA!"

Like a bat out of hell, Aqua took to invading my personal space, nearly startling me half to (second) death. She grabbed my shoulders and shook me as tears and dribble leaked out of her eyes and mouth. She was so disruptive, some of the nearby locals stopped what they were doing to openly stare at us. Not exactly the first impression I wanted to give my soon-to-be loyal subjects. This deranged woman was making me look bad, and not in the good way!

I pushed her out of my personal bubble and barked, "Get a grip already! Sheesh, you're even worse than me when it comes to being in public. And that's saying something."

The self-proclaimed goddess resorted to sniffling and whimpering instead of responding.

"…Okay, I can see you're busy having an existential crisis. You have fun with that. In the meantime, I'm gonna scope out the area and move on with my life. See you never!"

"WAIT!"

Before I could begin taking my first steps in an alien reality, I felt my right sleeve getting tugged back, forcing me to hold my horses. I glanced back around to find it was Aqua holding my trench coat captive. Her face was still as wet and snotty as ever.

"B-but I don't know wh-what to do h-here," she hiccupped miserably. "Besides, you're the one who got me into this mess in the first place! Now we're both stranded here!"

"Correction: you're the one who's stranded. I came here by choice, and I plan on making the most of it. You can go do whatever you want though, I don't really care. Just as long as it stays faaaaar away from me."

"Nonononono – please don't leave me all alone, Spicer-san! Please, please, PLEASE!"

I was beginning to get real annoyed with her stubborn attitude. "Look, why do you insist on staying with me when it's clear you don't even want to be here? Why not just, I don't know, ascend into the clouds and go back home to Heaven already?"

"Were you not listening to a thing Aeris was saying!?" Aqua exclaimed. "I've been exiled, I can't go home until the Devil King is defeated. And to make things even more tragic for me, most of my top-tier god powers have been locked away now that I'm stuck here in the mortal realm!"

Aqua's grip on my sleeve further tightened. She looked down at the ground and shook her head in a "No" motion, all while muttering that very word to herself on loop.

Well shit, it seems this crybaby was going to prove to be harder to get rid of than cockroaches. I mean, why shouldn't I be allowed to go at it on my own, huh? I've had it with partnerships! They always end the same way: with me getting thrown under the bus! Even though I've only just met Aqua, I can already tell she's gonna toss me aside the moment she deems my services "unnecessary". If there's one thing I've picked up on from my time hanging out with Chase and Wuya, it's to never trust anyone. Least of all immortals.

I was about to lecture Aqua on this when I heard her hiccup and sniffle quietly to herself. She wiped her nose on her sleeve and looked up at me with wet eyes. From where I was standing, she really did look a lot like a lost child, all scared and confused.

A lot like me whenever I was at my lowest, now that I think about it…

…

Alright, I know I'm gonna regret this later, but I'll take her in. Not out of the goodness of my greedy black heart, mind you. But because it would be, admittedly, dangerous to jump straight into the jaws of the unknown without some guidance. However, the moment I get my robots in production, she's outta here. No exceptions. Count on it.

"Fine."

Aqua blinked away her tears at the sound of my voice.

"I'll let you tag along with me on my adventure. But know that I will be the brains behind this operation. I'm the one in charge here, and whatever I say, you have to go through with it. Got it?"

Raising her fists, Aqua nodded at me with steely eyes and renewed vigor.

"Cool. Now then, in all my time playing video games, I've played Warcraft for a recorded playtime of ten minutes. So, if this place is anything like an MMORPG, then there's bound to be a guild for starters to join. You said this world functioned like a video game, right? Let's talk to some expository NPCs and get some intel on our location."

Aqua looked at me as though I had some other genetic disorder besides albinism and plainly stated, "I don't get it..."

"What don't you get?" I asked.

"How are you so calm all of a sudden?" she elaborated. "When I first met you, you were shaking like a cornered animal. Now you're all rational and stuff? The paperwork said you were supposed to be an emotional, shut-in NEET. So why are you so level-headed right now?"

NEET? Doesn't that stand for "Not in Education, Employment, or Training"…?

Where does this woman get off calling me a jobless hermit!? I have a job, it's evil entrepreneurship, thank you very much! And yeah, sometimes I skip school, but that's only because I'm a genius who has bigger fish to fry. I can't waste my time getting bogged down by something as pointless as homework.

"First of all, leave only constructive criticism next time. What you just said right there was completely uncalled for. Second of all, I'm known as a super evil genius for a reason; knowledge is the most powerful weapon anyone can wield. And finally, I go outside, thereby making me unfit to be a shut-in. Now, in the words of Arnold Schwarzenegger, 'Come with me if you want to live'."

With my killer impression said and done, I began my search for something that resembled a guild. Aqua lagged behind me not too long after.

"Okay, but just so you know, masquerading as a supervillain doesn't count as a real job," she said matter-of-factly.

"Jeez, you sound like my dad," I shot back. "I am too a supervillain. Maybe not in body, but I sure as hell am in mind and spirit. Haven't you ever heard of Lex Luthor?"

"No, but I've heard of mental institutions."

I waved my hand dismissively. "Aw, what do you know? You're just the goddess of liquids."

That definitely rustled her jimmies. "That's goddess of water to you, boy. And you better give me the proper respect I deserve or else you'll suffer at the hands of my divine retribution! Also, while I don't mind you calling me by my holy race, just stick with Aqua. I don't want everybody around here to freak out over my presence."

"Whatever floats your boat, Noah."

As we crossed over a small stone bridge, we found ourselves in a shopping district. There were stands selling everything from homemade weapons to potions most likely brewed by snake oilers. So far, this town was proving to be my kind of place.

I spotted a man selling a comically large piece of mutton to a single mother of five. Might as well start the reconnaissance mission there.

I sauntered up to the meat peddler after the family left and leaned on the counter, bad boy style.

"Hello, sir! What can I get you on this fine day?" he asked.

"Some basic exposition."

"…I'm sorry?"

"Oh, you know, worldbuilding dialogue, names of important people and places, the usual background NPC talk."

I opened my eyes to sneak a peek at the guy. My doubts on the inhabitants behaving like video game AI began to grow when I saw his reaction. It was...less than pleasant.

"Look, kid, I don't really know what you're talking about, but I think get it. You show up to town looking for opportunities and that all of a sudden makes you think you own the damn place. I've dealt with enough brats like you to know one when I see one. So unless you're here to purchase my goods, BEAT IT!"

"YEAH! You're holding up the line, punk!"

I gave myself whiplash as I discovered said line behind me. Disgruntled locals of larger size were definitely present and definitely not happy to see me. I excused myself before things could get ugly.

As I kept my eyes downward, I saw blue high heel boots enter my field of vision accompanied with a smug voice. "Smooth move back there, Prince Charming~ How about you let a goddess as charismatic as me do most of the talking, hmm~?"

So much for gamer's intuition.

After letting Aqua take the wheel for a bit, we eventually learned that we were in the Kingdom of Belzerg. The town we spawned in was the apparently a renowned city for all rookie adventurers: Axel Town. It's a city that was far enough away from the Devil King's castle to become a thriving trading town in the middle of a major migration route. Apparently, anybody who's anybody starts off in this circular town before joining the frontlines of the war or moving on with their lives.

Also, we found out where we needed to go to locate the local Adventurer's Guild. We followed the directions given, and soon made it to the main town plaza. Dead center was an all-encompassing, two-story tall building.

Welp, no point standing around and getting a sunburn. Aqua and I stepped up to the front of the wooden doors and let ourselves in.

The moment we were inside, a waitress greeted us cheerfully, "Hi, welcome to the Adventurer's Guild! If you're here to eat, grab a seat where you can. Or if you're looking for work, head on over to the counter." She then scurried off to presumably go take orders, leaving us to take in the scene.

Men and women of all shapes and sizes ate together at tables while waitresses served them their drinks and food. There were candlelit lamp posts, potted plants, a second-floor balcony that had more tables for patrons, a bulletin board with flyers, and even several large statues of icons I didn't recognize.

If I had to sum up the overall vibe of this place, I would say thrilling. A little rough around the edges but inviting for the most part.

"HEY YOU! The one who looks like he crawled out of a grave!"

Aqua and I both squeaked and directed our attention to a lone man sitting at a table close to the entrance.

He had a rough, scary-looking face and muscular body to compliment. The only clothes he had on were metal shoes, green pants, pink suspenders, and shoulder armor. But by far the most staggering feature of this man was his tall, maroon mohawk and matching beard/mustache combo.

He stared at us judgingly with his intimidating face before grunting, "Y'all got some weird-ass clothes on ya. I take it you two are from outta town?"

God, even his voice alone was putting me on edge. He hasn't even stood up yet and already he's triggering my fight-or-flight response (and just for the record, I am a firm advocate of the second response).

"Yeah, err, you could say that. M-m-m-my friend and I are trying to…sign up to become adventurers. W-we're gonna help take down the…Devil King?"

The buff man four times my size stared at me as if I had just said something to greatly piss him off.

So, this is how I die…again.

He suddenly whipped his head all the way back and let loose a hearty laugh. It was a reaction so out of left field, it made me flinch in response. After he had his fun, he smiled at me and spoke in a more relaxed manner.

"I only just met you, boy, and you've already proven to be funny as all get out! Haven't had a good laugh like that in ages. You and your lady friend don't look like folks who could take out the Devil King – but hey, it's your funeral. Welcome to the gates of Hell!"

The Mohawk Man then jabbed a thumb behind his shoulder. "Just talk with Luna over at the guild administration desk. She's the cute blonde chick with a heart o' gold. Ya can't miss her or those jugs!"

Without saying anything back, I briskly walked away, Aqua not far behind me.

Well, that was…a thing. What was up with that guy? He seemed to be – in his own way – friendly, I guess, but for some reason, I felt uneasy around him. I don't know, maybe I'm just being paranoid like usual. After all, I am in a foreign country, one which no doubt has its own set of cultural norms. Hopefully, with that in mind, the experience shouldn't be all that different from moving into China.

We shuffled our way over to the admission desks tucked away in the back corner of the building. Behind one of the free spots was a blonde woman wearing a red bowtie and a white, buttoned-up shirt that exposed her shoulders. She also happened to be gifted with…generous assets.

Don't. Stare. Jack…Much.

Unaware of the internal crisis going on inside my pants, the receptionist named Luna greeted us with a chipper tone, "Hello there Welcome to the Axel Town Adventurer's Guild. How can I help you today?"

I wanted to get this over with and take a cold shower, so I answered bluntly, "Yeah, hi, we were told to come to you if we wanted to apply for adventuring."

"Oh, I can help with that! The registration fee is 5,000 eris, please."

If I had to take a shot in the dark, I'd say that was the local unit of currency. If so, then I'm already fucked because my wallet's dry. I didn't have anything else on me other than pocket lint, and I doubt they accepted that.

Swallowing my pride, I turned to Aqua and asked if she still had that money pouch from before. She huffed in annoyance while patting herself down. "What am I to you, a charity? Anyway, of course I have the money! I wouldn't be stupid enough to forget something…that…important…"

Aqua lowered her head and discovered a newfound interest in her boots as she stood stiff like the statues in the room.

"You forgot it, didn't you?"

"…I might've dropped it when we were fighting…"

Somebody shoot me now.

Luna must've caught on to our situation because the next thing she said helped to restore my faith in humanity. "If you lack the sufficient funds, the guild here has employed a system of indentured servitude to aid those in need. A week of community service should be enough to pay back the debt, and it just so happens that we have one available slot left open."

Yes!

"Alright, what is it?"

"Manual labor at the construction site!"

No!

A full week of manual labor without the aid of my precious BuilderBots? I didn't have my soul transcend across the multiverse just to become a pack mule for a buncha meatheads!

But seeing as how we were desperate for cash, Aqua and I reluctantly accepted the offer. Luna beamed at us and exited the booth behind the counter.

"Excellent! Now, if you would kindly stick your hand over the crystal, it'll scan all of your traits and attributes."

She motioned to a little wooden stand right next to her workspace. It was just a blue orb with simplistic sprocket-wheels embedded around it. Odd, to say the least. But I did as instructed and stuck my hand over it.

"Am I doing this right?"

The crystal shined a bright blue as the sprockets surrounding it started turning and spinning. A small thin needle underneath the orb did something akin to a black hole absorbing a star. If I had to make an educated guess, I'd say the needle was harnessing the magical properties of the crystal and using that borrowed power to shoot a small, concentrated beam of energy at the blank card resting below it. The laser was automatically everywhere to wherever it needed signing, and by the time the process was finished, the blank card looked an awful lot like an ID.

The girls must've noticed my bewildered expression because they soon giggled randomly. But how could I not hide my amazement after witnessing that display? That weird little gizmo just laser-printed all my background info onto an index card! It would seem technology was indeed a thing around here, except it was less mechanical and more magical. Either way, that's not gonna stop me from disassembling it and finding out what makes it tick! I've studied enough Shen Gong Wu to develop a shaky foundation on the principles of magic from a scientific perspective; I know it can be done!

"Holy crap, that was so cool! What was that thing, some kind of magic printer?"

Luna attempted to hold in her giggles as she picked up my card. "I've rarely come across anyone who doesn't know what these things are. But to answer your question, they're just magical tools that every guild uses to make new Adventurer Cards. It makes it more difficult for dishonest folk to try and make forgeries. Now then! Allow me to explain how this adventuring business works."

Aww man, tutorials? Where's a skip button when you need it?

"The 'Adventurer' is a generic starting class, and your skills play a vital role in your survival. Which brings us to your Adventurer Card: a form of ID that keeps track of your Level based on all the monsters you've killed or eaten. When your Level increases, you'll earn skill points you can trade in to learn new skills. Work hard and you'll raise your Level in no time! Now how about we take a peek at your stats, hmm?"

Luna began to read through my card. Oh man, I'm getting all giddy!

"Let's see here…John Edward Spicer. That's an interesting name you've got there, it sounds foreign."

Ew, don't ever call me John or Edward. I much prefer the nickname Jack, thank you. How that ever became a nickname for John, I'll never know. But it does have a certain snap to it that I've always liked; very evil-sounding.

"Ah, here are your stats…Average across the board."

Truth be told, part of me kind of expected that.

"Two notable stats that stick out are your intelligence and luck. My word – you possess an astonishingly high intelligence! In all my time working here, I don't think I've ever seen a stat go that high before! Jack…you're a genius in every sense of the word."

The patrons and staff alike suddenly gathered behind us after hearing Luna's little outburst. I heard them all murmur about the "new smart kid who strolled into Axel". That would be me! I believe a gloat is in order.

"What can I say, who else would be smart enough to cheat on an IQ test?"

"Unfortunately, it looks as though your luck stat is way below average."

Everyone went dead quiet after that. Looks like I gloated just a bit too soon. That tends to happen a lot now that I think about it. At least I got my answer as to why.

Wait a minute – is that why I was on a Shen Gong Wu losing streak back home? Is that why I was born an albino? Is that why I have severe anxiety? All because I was predestined to be unlucky?! What the actual fuck?! If Lady Luck is represented as a goddess here, I'd like to vaporize her ass!

"I-it's okay, though! Luck really isn't that essential of a stat for adventuring. Please don't look so mad, I'm terribly sorry!"

Huh? Oh, I guess my anger was reflected on my face. Really gotta work on that.

"A-anyways, your stats will increase as you grow to higher Levels, so what you have right now isn't entirely set in stone. And even though you're temporarily stuck with the basic Adventurer class, you're always free to switch to a better one the higher Level you are. Personally, given your immense intelligence, I'd recommend something in the mage category. But that's just my humble opinion, I implore you to take it with a grain of salt. Hopefully, your luck stat will become just as high as your intelligence stat!"

Luna handed me my card as Aqua stepped up to get hers printed. While that was going on, I decided to look at the stats myself. Sure enough, they were all pretty average. At least all that fighting in Showdowns and robot construction helped to keep me somewhat active.

Hold the phone, it seems I've already got some skills displayed on here that Luna neglected to mention. I'll have to give this guild a negative review for subpar service. For now, though, let's see what I got in the way of skills:

One-Handed Swordsmanship: Gifts the user with immediate knowledge on fighting techniques for one-handed swords and other lightweight weapons.

Huh. Y'know, after reading that little blurb, I can already visualize all the different stances and techniques for single-handed sword combat. Even though I never studied it before! Weird…Still, would've been helpful in that one Showdown where I got pitted against lions in the Roman Colosseum. Along with Chase's ravenous jungle cats, I've been a dog person ever since.

Anyway, let's check out the other skill…Oh, hey! It's the cheat power I requested!

Sandbox Mode: With this magical skill, the user is able to spawn raw materials to use in the construction of robotic-based weaponry and objects. Tools such as (but not limited to) drills, wrenches, and welding rods can be summoned at the cost of additional mana.

Mana? Isn't that the bread-like substance that supposedly came from God to supply the Israelites on their journey through the wild? No, wait, I'm thinking of "Manna" with two n's. I think "mana" just refers to magic in general.

"Oh my goodness!"

A cry from Luna made me look up from my Adventurer Card. Aqua had already gotten hers printed out and Luna was looking it over in disbelief. Aqua merely stood there just as confused as everybody else.

"Even though your intelligence and luck are at rock bottom, the rest of your stats are exceptionally high!"

Not realizing that Luna had basically called her dumb, Aqua cheered, "Awesome! Does that mean I'm super-duper amazing!?"

"Amazing would be an understatement. Classes in the mage category require intelligence, so that's obviously out of the question. But other than that, you can choose from a multitude of advanced classes right from the get-go! Crusader, Swordmaster, Archpriest, most of them have already opened up for you!"

Aqua did that arrogant, popular girl hair flip I was all too familiar with while all the other adventurers gawked at her.

"HAH! It's a shame there's no class for a goddess! I'd choose that one in a heartbeat. But what about that Archpriest thing? That sounded kinda interesting?"

Luna went into walking encyclopedia mode when she answered, "An Archpriest plays major support roles in healing their party with magic, but they're also strong enough to hold their own in the frontlines of battle. Overall, a very prestigious class."

"Then that settles it! From this day forward, I, Aqua, will become the greatest Archpriest the world has ever seen!"

The crowd surrounded the goddess incognito and cheered her on with compliments and praises. Aqua even encouraged them to keep up the kind words she was receiving, especially from all the flirty ones.

And guess who was left forgotten just as quickly as he was introduced? While everyone swarmed that spotlight-stealing attention whore, I got shoved into the sidelines. It wasn't fair, that should've been me getting told I was gonna do great things! She didn't even wanna be here!

…

You know what? Fuck it, let Aqua have her little moment. Let the other adventurers sing her praises for now. Because when I'm the new Devil King, they're gonna be worshiping me and no other deity. I'll show them, they're gonna be sorry they glanced over someone with a powerful mind like mine.

I'll make sure of it…

Suddenly, the crowd opened a hole for Aqua to exit out of and she pointed at me with a look of confidence. "Jack, it's time for our lives as adventurers to begin!"

"I was under the impression that you wanted no part of this…"

Without missing a beat, but certainly missing the hint, Aqua responded with, "Well, I like this part of it."

What a brainless bimbo.

My first week in the Fantasy World was anything but fantastical. It was grueling.

Getting paired up with a whiny, self-centered, crybaby who expects everything to be handed to her on a silver platter was proving to be both infuriating and frustrating to an academically superior mortal such as myself. Now I'm starting to understand what it's like to be in Wuya's shoes (even though that expression would've worked better if she wasn't always walking around barefoot).

Then there was having to work to pay off the friggin' debt. Becoming an indentured servant was something that never crossed my mind when I arrived in an alternate reality. Not only that, but the sleeping conditions were just as crappy. Literally. We had to sleep in an empty stable that was littered with horse droppings. I did clean it up and throw a sheet over the haystack, but that wasn't enough to get rid of the smell, nor did it do anything to drown out the animal noises.

But when I wasn't resting in a smelly stable or cleaning up shit, I was out breaking my back at the construction site. I was digging holes, lugging around heavy supplies, layering bricks, basically anything the workers could come up with. It was all too similar to the time I made the mistake of trying to turn good and become a Xiaolin Monk.

Given my weaker physique, I was not up to snuff with the other workers, and they all gave me a ton of flak for it. Meatheads, the lot of 'em. At least they were paying for our meals at the Adventurer's Guild.

Although that doesn't excuse the fact that all Aqua did was paint a few walls and flirt with the workers, who were more than willing to stop whatever it was they were doing and talk to a pretty face. Y'know, now that I think about it, she's a lot like Wuya in some ways: both are demanding, naggy, and really only viable to me in one aspect. With Wuya, it was her ability to detect Shen Gong Wu. With Aqua, it was her healing spells, and even then she had the nerve to claim that her talents were going to waste!

I swear to all that is evil, a malfunctioning JackBot with no arms or photoreceptors would be more useful than this goddess has-been.

Speaking of JackBots, I've also been fiddling around with my custom skill cheat. I learned that all you need to do is say the name of the skill and it'll automatically do what its namesake entails. In the case of Sandbox Mode, it pulls up a menu not unlike Garry's Mod with literally everything I need to build robots.

It takes up magic points to spawn simple things like metal alloys and electrical wires. Summoning tools used up a good chunk of my magic and left me feeling as though I had been shot by the Woozy Shooter.

As I had hypothesized, "mana" was the term used regarding magic points. Everyone in the Fantasy World has some mana stored within their bodies, and mana can only be restored by either resting or eating monsters; however, it can also be restored artificially by drinking magic potions that can be purchased at the local magic shop.

Since the money that I earned (because Aqua did JACK diddly squat) was automatically deducted to pay for the registration fee, the only way for me to gain my mana back was to sleep the night away. But even with me sweating my balls off at work every day, I still had too much energy left to burn. I did make an attempt to fall asleep sometimes, but I would just keep waking back up every minute by the hour. What pitiful amount of mana I could restore naturally was drained spawning simple items like screws and screwdrivers. On the bright side, I did have enough materials to properly repair my HeliBot. So there's that.

A week later, and I was finally free of debt. The workers were kind enough to throw a party at the guild for my hard work, so that was cool. Unfortunately, Aqua had one too many drinks and puked out actual-I'm-not-even-joking rainbows after the party. I had to be the one to help her wobble back to the stables.

Which leads me to where I am now: sitting on a hay bale fixing my broken HeliBot with a drunk Aqua giggling to herself on our makeshift bed. I'll admit, it was a bit awkward at first for me to sleep next to someone with supernatural beauty. But after getting to know her this past week, I got over it pretty quick. Besides, she's a drooling mess when she sleeps.

I was concentrating on repairing the spring lock system in my HeliBot when Aqua slurred, "Heehee~ Hey, Jackie. I've been – I've been thinkin' 'bout stuff."

I couldn't be bothered to look up from my work. "Oh really? You mean you actually have enough brain cells to do that?"

"Aaahhh, shut your face. Anywho, let's say you an' me get up reeeeeeal early tomorrow and go on our very first quest together!"

...Okay, that was enough to make me look up at her as though she grew a second head. Which then started to cannibalize her first head.

"Already? But we're still Level 1; we don't even have gear or weapons."

Aqua sat up cross-legged and stared at me with her lazy, unfocused eyes before saying, "Um, hel~lo, did you forget who I am? Am a goddess, silly! You don't gotta worry 'bout no stinky mean monsters with me around. You can count on me!"

For as amusing as her drunken stupor was to me, she did make a valid point. She was a goddess from Heaven. Granted, she might have been demoted to a demigod since coming here, but there's no doubt she must have at least some divine qualities up her sleeve. With her in my ranks, conquering this planet should be a cinch!

Who knows, maybe she isn't so useless after all.

"Y'know what, Aqua, I think I might take you up on that- -"

She passed out.

Call it a hunch, but I think she might be an alcoholic. Again, though, just a hunch.

Oh hey, it's that Swood Guy again. I know this chapter was kind of short, but it is the "Obligatory Tutorial Section", so that's kind of to be expected. Not to worry, though, because we get to meet everyone's favorite little magical pyromaniac in the very next chapter! So stay tuned for when that drops.

Also, what class do you think Jack should go with? Personally, I can see him becoming a Thief like Chris, which is especially ironic given that the Steal skill is only useful if the user has a high luck stat. Still, I suppose Jack could always resort to the old fashioned way of stealing just like in his glory days. Let me know what you think in the reviews. We still have a ways to go anyway before we get to a major decision like that.

Once again, special thanks to my childhood friend for proofreading.