A/N: The Potterverse belongs to JK. This plot belongs to me. Enjoy!
tampo - (v.) to express sudden disinterest or hurt feelings, where one usually pretends tantrum or fakes anger to elicit apology or affection from someone [filipino]
"Baby, I'm sorry. You know I love you."
"Then why did you do something so hurtful, Neville? You know how much I love this dress, and how much effort I've put in to keeping it in perfect condition so that I can be the dutiful wife for all of your business meetings that bore me to tears. I wonder how many other things of mine you secretly hate, just like you apparently hate my favorite dress!"
Neville sighed, wiping his hand across his face tiredly. He spared a brief glance at the heavens, mouthing "Why me?", before standing and going over to where his rather frustrated wife stood. He tried to wrap her in a hug, but she lightly shoved him away, still in a huff. He slumped against the wall, exasperated that what seemed to him to be such a trivial matter had escalated to this.
For her part, Hannah stood in front of their floor-length mirror, inspecting her dress for imperfections, while also keeping an eye on her husband. The flaws with the dress were minor, something that she could probably fix in a couple of minutes, but it was how the flaws came to be that had really brassed her off. Her loving, devoted, wonderful husband had apparently decided that this dress would be much better served as food for some of his more exotic plants, and she had barely been able to recover her clothing from the plant before it had absorbed the material. In truth, this wasn't actually her favorite dress, but it was one she liked, and she was rather distressed that she had almost lost it.
Sparing a glance at her Neville, she noticed that he seemed defeated, and while she did want to teach him a lesson from this experience, she didn't really want to keep fighting with him over this. Returning to his side, she gently wrapped her arms around him, resting her head on his shoulder.
"If you really didn't like the dress that much, you could have just told me, you know? It's not like we can't afford to get me another one." He chuckled weakly, and she saw that her actual point had gotten through. "I suppose I can donate this one in the interest of research, but you will be buying me a replacement, understood?" Neville nodded, and returned her loving embrace.
"I really do apologize, Hannah. I just got so excited about the possibilities that I forgot I hadn't asked you at all. Please forgive me?"
Hannah smiled. "Of course, dear. But what possible reason could you have for feeding clothes to a plant, anyway?"
Neville blushed and mumbled something that Hannah couldn't quite make out. "I definitely hear the words 'edible' and 'fortune' in there, but you're going to have to speak up if you want me to understand you." Her grin widened, figuring that whatever Neville was up to had to be no good for him to have returned to this level of shyness.
Brave Gryffindor that he was, Neville stood tall, and told his wife very clearly what his experiment was intended for. "The plant I'm currently working with is known to try and duplicate the things it eats. While it doesn't always work, it seems to be more successful with natural materials. Therefore, I wanted to use your silk dress and see if it would be able to create a duplicate, preferably one that would be more vegetable than cloth. Because if I could create a more widespread method of making edible clothing, I could probably make a fortune on it, and at worst, I would be able to make our evenings together more exciting. There. Now you know. Are you pleased with yourself?"
As Neville's explanation went on, Hannah became more and more flushed. She was unable to speak immediately following his question, but she nodded quickly. She then carefully removed her dress, and handed it to him. He turned to leave, and had gotten as far as the door when a soft piece of cloth landed on his shoulder. He glanced at it, before his gaze travelled over to his now topless wife.
"If you're going to experiment, you should probably have a couple different kinds of fabric to test, shouldn't you?"
And experiment he did, a few hours later.