A/N: There is no excuse for my delay in uploading except that I got really tired of life in general and that bled into my writing and coming back to this story did not infuse me with the rush I needed so I avoided it instead of powering through. I apologise for keeping you all hanging. But I am glad You are back!

A quick recap as I know its been a while: After their argument, we last saw Darcy & Lizzie trying to have a conversation about the way forward and some words were exchanged, injuries were sustained and the heat was definitely turned up to some degree (hahaha). Anyway we are pretty much picking up soon after that.

Enjoy!

Chapter Summary: Darcy & Elizabeth continue in their quest to find common ground.

Track Recommendation: "Falling, Catching" - Agnes Obel

There was a voice humming from the next room. Though he could not recognise the tune there was something familiar about the voice. Darcy was drawn from his kneeling position beside the bed curious to see the source of the voice. Before he crossed the threshold into the next room he looked back. He did not have time to ponder at the state of the clean bed currently not drenched in Anne's blood, as the humming drew his attention again.

Standing, facing an open door was Anne. Of all the things he noticed about this version of his late wife, what struck Darcy was her hair. It was more vibrant than Darcy had ever seen and with the sun streaming through the windows and door, Anne was framed in a way that reminded him of the angels in some of Pemberley's paintings. Could this be the rare exception where he would have some respite from the variations of the nightmare of losing Anne? Could he for once have an opportunity to just be content in his own mind?

The voice continued to hum but Darcy could not tell if it was emanating from Anne.

"Come and see Fitzwilliam." Anne's voice, filled with such warmth, broke through his thoughts.

As she had grown older and her illness had progressed, Anne's voice had taken on a raspiness that reflected her diminishing strength. To hear it clear and assured left Darcy with a strong yearning for a reality he would never experience; one in which Anne had been strong enough to bear their children and live to see them grow.

"They are so very beautiful," said Anne once more. Darcy approached her slowly, hesitant to see her face. There was no guarantee that his mind would not play tricks on him. But when he reached her side he saw that the Anne before him was a version he had never beheld. At least not since she was a little girl and her illness had not yet stolen some of her vibrancy. The Anne before him had supple skin, cheeks that carried a healthy red flush coupled with a bright smile that reached her eyes.

Darcy did not know how long he stared but Anne did not once turn to look at him, so drawn was she to the scene ahead of her that Darcy eventually turned to also in the same direction. This also allowed him to confirm the source of the humming. A figure who he knew was Elizabeth was situated a distance away on a bench facing away from Darcy & Anne. Even though he could not see her face, he knew it was her voice. She was watching the children who were running around playing a game which Darcy could not decipher.

"They have been waiting for you for a while. They understand that you have been a little busy. They want you to join in," said Anne and this time she looked at Darcy. Her smile had grown even wider, offering him encouragement he did not know he needed.

Darcy was grateful that for the first time since he had been haunted by her in his dreams, he could look at her in a state other than the lifeless or manic forms that often visited him in his dreams.

When he still had not spoken, Anne asked "What are you afraid of Fitzwilliam?". Her expression had not changed. She still seemed to be encouraging him.

He looked away from her. Back to his children and their governess who now also seemed to enjoy haunting his dreams. He was ashamed that he could not find the words to articulate what he feared.

"Give them my love, will you," said Anne, now sounding distant. In the moment he had looked away she had started walking away, not towards the room where there was the bed which usually haunted his dreams but to an opposite hallway which seemed to stretch on endlessly.

Darcy wanted to call her back, to tell her to come with him to tell the children herself. She could finally see them, hear them as she had barely had the chance to do that tragic night. But he could not find his voice. He felt like there was a vice around his neck restricting him from exercising the full function of his voice. And the more he tried to speak the more his lungs seemed to constrict until he was desperately clutching at his neck, gasping for air.

Darcy woke up with a start, his breaths coming in quick succession. As always he took a moment to find his bearings. He was in his bed, it was already morning; the sun was streaming through the open curtains and his valet, Carter was moving around his room preparing his clothes. He could not remember the last time he had been roused from sleep by a servant. Usually they arrived after he had already been awake for a couple of hours.

"Good morning, sir," said Carter who acted as if nothing was amiss despite his master still gasping for air.

Darcy did not respond, choosing instead to sit up and take a moment to appreciate the feeling of being able to breathe. His mind was already scrambling to piece together his dream but Darcy decided to stave off the desire to relive it. If one could grade dreams, Darcy knew it had actually been one of his best. Despite the end, seeing Anne again looking so full of life was something Darcy did not soon want to forget.

Darcy went about his morning routine allowing Mr Carter to assist him as usual with a bath and dressing. He felt like a marionette, with his thoughts so far removed from the tasks at hand that Mr Carter needed to constantly tap him to unusually prompt him to do anything. Finally dressed, Darcy glanced at his pocket watch as he secured it to his waist coat. The realisation that there were only a couple of hours until he was to meet with Elizabeth filled him with dread.

He was not afraid to meet her, after all this meeting could be as simple as him stating how he intended to give her more say, albeit only a little, over the children's education seeing as he was not so subtly persuaded by his Aunt. But what he dreaded was that, as much as he fought to hold on to some control when it came to the matter of his children, there was a lack of control that possessed him whenever he was in Elizabeth's presence. He always seemed to be teetering on the edge, itching to prove his role as an authority figure in her figure and yet desperate to try and bridge the gap they had created to better understand her. This ultimately led to him struggling to communicate in a civil manner that was befitting of his status. Somehow, something they both did or said always aggravated the other.

A good example was their last interaction prior to him burning his hand. Had she not been on the verge of telling him the truth about how he could improve when it came to his children when their discussion, if it could be called that, devolved into an argument about the semantics of an overheard conversation? He was annoyed that he recognised his misstep in having the conversation with Bingley and his cousin in such an open space in which admittedly anyone could have overheard. And of course it had to be the subject of the conversation that overheard.

Darcy sighed wondering how a paid subordinate could have led him to such a predicament. He could easily have let her go. As much as Bingley and his cousin, Fitzwilliam believed Elizabeth was an asset there was so much animosity between the two of them that Darcy did not see the point in trying to rectify anything. Darcy also reasoned he could easily secure another governess but with that thought was the sobering and very annoying realisation that of the few governesses he had employed, only Elizabeth had managed to engage his children as well. He could not help but acknowledge how Archie was now more interested in his lessons or how Rosie's energy was now better channelled.

He also could not deny that whenever he asked Mr Mason and on occasion Mrs Reynolds for their assessment of Elizabeth and her interactions with the children, as they were the most senior servants who interacted with her, they had nothing but praises for how the children were faring. Well Mr Mason's review could not be described as praise so much as it was begrudging respect. Darcy knew that Mr Mason of all the servants had been the least charmed by Elizabeth as most of the servants seemed to have been. It was not out of a particular dislike of her but because Mr Mason's only concern was the running of the household and whether the servants fulfilled their duties. And so hearing him during one of their meetings express how Elizabeth "though a little brash and forward" was "ultimately fulfilling her duty to an acceptable standard" had also forced Darcy to reassess his inability to not find any redeeming quality in her. If Mr Mason could respect her, could he not do the same? He knew it was not an easy feat considering the last few months.

If he could reverse time to when he and Thorpe were reviewing the applications, he would burn the reply letter that Thorpe had sent advising Elizabeth that she had been hired to work as a governess. He wanted to put it down to Elizabeth's age or lack of experience but he knew that Elizabeth was only a handful because everything she did was against his nature.

He understood his nature enough to recognise that he was a particular man, who had a desire for things to be as they should be. That is how he had been able to manage his affairs and the estate so effectively all these years without his father to guide him. Every minute was accounted for; if he was not scheduled to be meeting with tenants, then he was attending a meeting with Thorpe, or reviewing ledgers and estate books. Some people, like his governess, could even say he was rigid but Darcy knew that this sense of control is what allowed him to wake up each morning with even a modicum of hope. And though he knew that the things that drove him to hold on to this control were beyond his control, he also knew that he had suffered too much loss to let things be. And that included with his children.

He could not quite express the gamut of emotions that hit him after hearing Elizabeth's assessment that his children had been happier when he had been away. It was a statement said in anger, it was meant to hurt and did not paint the true picture but it was true nonetheless. And it invoked a sense of shame, disappointment and regret. It also was confirmation that he had been right to be anxious to leave his children with Elizabeth. Irrational as he might have seemed, Darcy knew his children were intelligent enough to recognise that Elizabeth offered them a sense of freedom he had not allowed them. And as such their affinity to her and even their loyalty to her could only grow as a result.

However, her desire to paint him the villain in his children's lives blinded her from seeing how his rigidity was justified by what he had gone through twice in his life, when in one breath God blessed and cursed him. First when God blessed him with a sister but took away his mother and next when God blessed him with children and took away his wife. No man survived that without the requisite scars to show, hidden as they were.

And in all this there was the issue Darcy refused to address or atleast was hesitant to address in the sea of chaos surrounding him. As he made his way to his study where he was to meet Elizabeth, his mind drifted to his other feelings towards Elizabeth; the attraction that vexed him to no end.

And his attraction to Elizabeth had gotten the best of him in their last interaction. He knew it was pointless to try and deny that while she had treated his burn his thoughts had been anything but innocent. The way he had almost jumped out of his skin when she had first touched him. As if he were a schoolboy first discovering the many ways the body responded to the fairer sex. And like the moment in the greenhouse he had been so close to doing something that he would have most certainly regretted. He would be forever grateful to Mrs Reynolds for her excellent timing.

And tempted as he was, he could not terminate Elizabeth's employment based on something he could squash and banish to the depths of his mind. Most men would probably laugh at his predicament and his strange sense of honour which had led him to retaining an employee he wanted nothing to do with. But he was bound to his promises to his aunt and sister to give Elizabeth another chance. If it was not for their intervention, Elizabeth would already be back wherever she came. So even when he could not see how anything fruitful would result from their upcoming meeting or if they could bridge the wide gap created since they first met, Darcy was willing to try for the sake of his aunt, sister, children and his own sanity.

...

The other party to this meeting was also not having an easy time of it. As she prepared for the meeting, Elizabeth's thoughts were a mixture of anxiety, fear, but mostly dread that made it impossible for her to drink so much as a glass of water. When a few sips of the tea she had requested Bessie to bring her had proved to only upset her stomach, Elizabeth had resorted to pacing around her room. For Elizabeth, the dread of meeting Darcy was no longer centred on the question of her employment but rather their recent interaction which she was uncertain what to make of it.

Elizabeth had easily dismissed the moment in the greenhouse as her imagination coming to play; her emotions leading her to believe the impossible. At the time it had been easy to dismiss anything Darcy could have done as being simply a product of the moment. She had rationalised that Darcy had not wanted to kiss her but rather intimidate her by invading her personal space. It had simply been her own inexperienced heart latching onto a moment of heightened emotions. She could not begin to fathom why Darcy had been the trigger for such improper thoughts. For what reason would he have wanted to kiss her?

Elizabeth still wondered the same thing but now she had no justification to dismiss what she knew would have happened two nights prior. Elizabeth did not fancy herself an expert in the laws of attraction but her limited experience and exposure to gentlemen while teaching in France meant that she could recognise when a man's eyes appreciated their view or when the thoughts occupying a man's mind were anything but platonic. There was no mistaking the way Darcy had looked at her while she had assisted him with the burn. Desire had been blatantly written across his face. And if Mrs Reynolds had not arrived at that moment, Elizabeth dreaded to think how the situation would have unfolded.

And where it any other situation she would have rejoiced at finally being able to read Darcy. However, her knowledge of what had most likely occupied his thoughts did not bring her joy. It only added to the stress of her situation. What did it mean that Darcy had looked at her that way? Was it loneliness at having been widowed so long that made her small act of kindness seem like an invitation for more? Had she been too forward, too presumptuous in extending a helping hand? Had it simply been her imagination and perhaps he had been looking at her with disgust instead? And why had he gone out of his way to protect her when relaying to Mrs Reynolds the events of the night?

The telltale signs of the beginnings of a headache led Elizabeth to resume her seat at her desk. She had been attempting to pen down a reply to Jane before departing for the meeting, but so far it had not been a useless exercise as she continued to make errors and at one point had accidentally knocked over her inkwell leading to her spoiling a whole page of her letter and also needing to change out of her dress. With the last few days being so eventful Elizabeth had tried her best to canvas all the events.

Elizabeth picked up Jane's small painting capturing Longburn at the break of dawn. The painting had been included in Jane's letter which had arrived some days prior to the guests departing. The painting was the first thing she saw when she broke the seal and the longing it had induced had been so acute she had been on the verge of tears. When Charlotte had visited her following the confrontation with Darcy, Elizabeth had shown the painting to Charlotte who had also expressed her own longing for Lucas Lodge, her family home. Charlotte believed the feeling could never be suppressed regardless of how content she was in her current situation. One had to learn to live with it.

Elizabeth brushed her fingers over the simple, yet intricate painting. As with all of Jane's paintings, the house had been given a sense of life. Even in its stillness, Elizabeth was able to close her eyes and hear the hive of activity that was the daily state of Longbourn especially when the family rose and prepared for the day.

The accompanying letter had given Elizabeth a glimpse of some of the things happening at Longbourn and in the community including a visit from their Aunt and Uncle Gardiner along with their young cousins, a recent marriage between two of Meryton's wealthy families and the arrival of the militiamen whose base would be at a field near Meryton until well into the winter.

"...Mama, Lydia and Kitty have found a new pastime in visiting Meryton, hoping that one of the militiamen will take notice. Though I believe Lydia and Kitty should be interested in other matters other than marriage, the situation is not helped by Mama who only serves to encourage them.

Aunt and Uncle Phillips and the Lucases have also hosted some of the senior ranking officers and of course Mama and the girls have attended each event. I have only attended one assembly. Mama was also successful in convincing Papa to invite Colonel Forster and his wife (who acts closer in age to Lydia) to dine with us at Longbourn. Though I strongly believe that Mama would have wanted a couple of the officers to have also joined us. She is particularly fond of a Mr Wickham and Mr Denny who have charmed the hearts of many ladies in Meryton.

There have also been a couple of gentlemen, or should I refer to them as officers, who seem interesting. However, it presents quite the challenge when the conversation is biased towards relaying their adventures patrolling other shires.

Mama has been disappointed that no proposal has eventuated for one of us as yet. Although I think the disappointment is mostly that as her eldest daughter I have not managed the task of securing a husband.

I am looking forward to visiting London with the Gardiners as they plan to take me with them when they return to London later in the month…"

Upon concluding yet another readthrough Elizabeth could not help analysing the letter once more to pick out anything she might have missed. Jane's letters were always neutral due to Jane's sweet nature bleeding through and preventing her from being able to speak ill of anyone or anything. However, Elizabeth had learnt to read between the lines.

Like how Jane and Mary would have been forced to join Mrs Bennet, Lydia and Kitty on their adventures in Meryton. Or how Mrs Bennet most likely persuaded her sister to host the militiamen as a means to show, by association, the Bennets' standing in society as preferably Mrs Bennet would have wanted to host at Longbourn but Mr Bennet would not have entertained such a thing happening. And how the evening meal at Longbourn would have been a great compromise for Mr Bennet, most likely done to silence Mrs Bennet who would not have put the issue to rest.

Or how Jane would have struggled to maintain conversation if her partner in the exercise was as self centred as these officers sounded. Jane was naturally quiet and shy so any conversation she engaged in needed the partner to know how to balance talking about themself while also prying information out of Jane. That is why Jane tended to stick to Elizabeth at most events, as Elizabeth was a natural conversationalist who could handle the awkward silences that were common when conversing with a new acquaintance. Jane was not as set in her views as Elizabeth when it came to matters of the heart. Jane had always been willing to compromise for the good of her family. So if one of these officers were to make a proposal Jane would most likely say yes. But Elizabeth also knew that Jane had become more reserved since the ordeal with Mr Fairfield so it would be difficult for most men to understand if she was interested. And it would take an exceptional man for her to lower her guard. He at least needed to speak about himself less.

There was a knock at her door that brought Elizabeth to the present. Bessie entered.

"Miss Bennet, when should I expect you?" asked Bessie.

Elizabeth's meeting with Darcy had been arranged for a time that would interrupt her lessons with the children and so Bessie would care for them until Elizabeth returned.

"I cannot say Bessie. But I believe it should not go well into their morning tea. I hope I am not inconveniencing you from other duties?" said Elizabeth.

"Not at all, Miss," said Bessie.

"I already spoke to Archie and Rosie so they should not pester you with too many questions," said Elizabeth, knowing the children's curiosity about her absence would lead to many questions.

Bessie smiled knowingly and after clarifying a few more details about the children's morning activities, exited leaving Elizabeth with her thoughts.

...

Even though there was still some time before she was due to meet Darcy, Elizabeth departed for Darcy's study earlier than was necessary, not seeing much point in waiting in her room where her mind would not give her peace. However, Elizabeth still took the longer route to reach her destination. When she finally reached Darcy's study she took a moment to collect herself. This room represented so many things to Elizabeth, chief among them being the dread that was currently weighing heavily on her stomach. Her mind had conjured multiple scenarios about how this meeting would unfold and none of the scenarios were reassuring.

Here goes nothing, she thought as she took a moment to savour the calm before the storm.

As she raised her fist to knock, the door opened such that Elizabeth's hand was left awkwardly elevated in midair while Darcy's face appeared from behind the door.

At first all Darcy did was stare and all Elizabeth did was leave her hand hanging lamely in the air.

And then in what had become a strange pattern, they both spoke.

"I thought I was on time," said Elizbeth as Darcy also said "We will not be meeting here today".

"Pardon?" they both said.

Once again Darcy put up his hands to halt any further statements and Elizabeth could only maintain a straight face for a brief moment before she laughed awkwardly. Darcy maintained his coolness but Elizabeth noticed a slight uptick to his lips. A blink and you will miss it moment. Even with their fraught relationship, Elizabeth was relieved to see that it was not only herself who found these strange encounters awkwardly humorous.

"I think we should really stop doing that," said Elizabeth, lost for what else to say.

"That would be preferable," said Darcy, not nearly as able to navigate the awkwardness as Elizabeth was for he looked like he wanted to redo this moment to perhaps gain some sense of control.

"You were saying, sir?" asked Elizabeth, although technically she had heard what Darcy said but in the rush had not quite comprehended.

Darcy cleared his throat, "If you will follow me, I thought -," he took a moment to search for the right words, "a change of scenery might be best."

Elizabeth only nodded, not willing to question his change of mind as she had not been looking forward to being in his study. She had a feeling the room would work against her as it was a place in which Darcy would hold the power.

"I hope you are not opposed to a walk," said Darcy.

"No sir," said Elizabeth, relieved to hear that Darcy was opting for an activity that would suit her as well. "If there is one thing I enjoy, it is walking." She had to stop herself from saying more lest she start any fires she could not put out by saying too much. Not to mention that Darcy most likely did not care about her favourite pastimes. But she still wondered what had inspired the change in their usual meeting place.

Darcy did not comment any further, instead taking the lead to walk in a direction that would take them outside. Elizabeth thought they would go to one of the nearby gardens but instead Darcy moved to the path which led to the perimeter of the estate. Elizabeth walked a step behind Darcy feeling that walking alongside him was too close for comfort. The feeling of dread had not stopped. It had only been alleviated by the prospect of not having to face him while talking across his study room table. But it did not mean that other things did not present a threat.

Walking a step behind him however, drew Elizabeth's attention to Darcy's elegance. When she had first observed him walking, during the long and nerve-racking walk to his study for their first official meeting, she had noted how he seemed to glide through his home with such ease. And similarly as they made their way along the path, he was gliding through the grounds in a manner most gentlemen of his status who had received the requisite training would adopt. But at the time what Elizabeth had not noticed was that Darcy's elegance also had a strange tightness to it. Almost as if he was reining in any muscles that might prompt him to act without intent.

Elizabeth reflected on how his shoulders had seemed to relax under her fingers as she helped him with his injury. His sigh had emanated from deep within indicating that the relief he felt went beyond that of the relief he was feeling from the pain of the injury. The memory prompted a remembrance of the warmth she had felt at the points of connection she had made with his arm. It did not matter that he had been wearing his undershirt which covered his skin, the heat had been palpable. Elizabeth was grateful that she was walking slightly behind Darcy as her cheeks suddenly felt warm in a way that was contradictory to the slight breeze in the air.

To distract herself Elizabeth zeroed in on Darcy's injured hand which he had loosely clasped in the other behind his back.

"I would be remiss not to ask," said Elizabeth. Though she hesitated before proceeding, uncertain if she should even ask lest he think it was beneath him to respond. But she was not as cold as he tended to be and even with the little that she knew about burn injuries she knew that the wrapping around his hand was an indication that the wound was still troubling him. Not to mention it made her feel less guilty for focusing on inappropriate thoughts about her master. "How is your hand?"

Darcy glanced behind him looking at her briefly before he freed his hand and brought it forward to look at it as if he was only realising he had sustained an injury. "It is functional." Darcy seemed like he did not want to elaborate but then he added, "Your preliminary treatment helped with the pain, Doctor Moore asked me to relay his compliments."

Elizabeth could not help her smile. She was relieved that her efforts had helped and pleased that someone with far more experience had recognised this. "Thank you sir," said Elizabeth trying not to smile in a way that showed her pride.

Darcy looked at her for a moment longer before he continued walking prompting Elizabeth to also follow. The return to silence meant Elizabeth's feelings of unease returned and searching for something else to focus her mind on, other than Darcy, Elizabeth took time to appreciate the view of the grounds. The transition from summer had brought a beautiful splash of colour to Pemberley's grounds in the form of fallen leaves and flowers. Though groundskeepers worked tirelessly to clear the grounds each morning to maintain Pemberley's veneer of perfection, Elizabeth appreciated the interim moments when nature was allowed to be, with fallen leaves and twigs littering the pristine grounds. Though the Derbyshire landscape was different from Hertfordshire, it still offered the same openness and freedom offered by her home shire. But the trump card was definitely Pemberley. Elizabeth could not think of estates that came close to it. Pemberley may not have been the largest but the way it was designed to maximise the natural landscape and the rigorous maintenance meant that it surpassed many of the finest estates in England. At the time of their first meeting she had wanted to compliment Darcy for the beauty of his home but had been uncertain how the compliment would be received in light of the disastrous nature of their meeting. This ultimately brought her thoughts back to the man she was trying to avoid.

"I do not believe I have said this to you before sir but you have a beautiful estate," said Elizabeth before she could second guess herself.

Darcy stilled for a moment also halting Elizabeth in her step. He made a point of slightly angling his body to look at her making eye contact and though Elizabeth tried to maintain it she broke it as she could not read his expression. He was not looking at her in the same way he had two nights prior but the scrutiny was too uncomfortable for Elizabeth.

"Any aspect that you favour?" asked Darcy.

Surprised at the follow up question, Elizabeth took a moment to think. And try as she may to be reserved in her comments, she could not hold back her thoughts about Pemberley.

"There are so many things I could list; the gardens, the lakes, the attention to detail inside and out. But I think looking back on when I first arrived and was fortunate to see the house and grounds at sunset, my favourite aspect would be how the house seems to have a life of its own." Elizabeth had turned to look back at the house and her eyes glazed over in remembrance. "I remember the house glimmered when I first saw it," she chuckled at this. "I know it doesn't actually glimmer but I had never seen a sight like it. The way the lake is situated such that under the right light the bricks reflect the light. It is breathtaking."

When the silence stretched for a while, Elizabeth realised that they were still standing in the same place and Darcy's eyes were trained on her.

Elizabeth looked away quickly, "Forgive me, I am starting to sound like Jane. She has a painter's eye."

She resumed walking for lack of anything else to do considering they were outside and after a moment Darcy fell into step beside her.

"Jane is one of your sisters," said Darcy as more of a statement of fact rather than a question. Elizabeth wondered how much he knew of her family. She had relayed some details to his aunt, sister and Mr Thorpe but he had never been one to take an interest in anything about her aside from her duties as it pertained to his children.

"Yes, the eldest. I am one of five girls," said Elizabeth with a wry smile. The opportunity to speak more about her family was tempting but she remembered her audience.

"Are all of them governesses?" asked Darcy.

Where is this sudden interest in my family coming from? she wondered.

"No, sir. Three of them could still do with having a governess," chuckled Elizabeth, her natural instinct to find humour in most situations bleeding through. Elizabeth was finding it hard to remember her own advice to remember her audience. Darcy glanced at her and Elizabeth quickly elaborated, "The youngest three range from age 15 to 19. Like most girls their age their focus is on more trivial matters, like which colour ribbon they will wear to their next assembly. Except for Mary, she is my immediate sibling, she takes interest in more intellectual pursuits such as reading and music. Nonetheless, I am the only one that ventured into seeking employment."

Elizabeth glanced nervously at Darcy who did not show any signs of annoyance at her monologue. She attributed her talking to nerves. For the first time, Darcy was engaging her in conversation that did not teeter on the edge of an argument. There was no interrogation, though his questions still left her trying to figure out his intent.

"Were you not of similar age when you took your first post?" asked Darcy.

Elizabeth could not help the slight rise in her eyebrows. She had disclosed this when she had first started being a governess, so it made sense that Darcy would have this knowledge but the fact that he seemed to be using it to make an argument in favour of her sisters was something else entirely.

"I was," said Elizabeth. She did not know whether to add anything else. She was trying to navigate the awkwardness of speaking to Darcy in a civil manner considering there always seemed a risk of causing offence.

"Then is it not unfair to assume their age would preclude them from doing the job well?" said Darcy.

"I cannot argue with that," said Elizabeth with a slight chuckle at the logic behind what Darcy was saying. "My assessment was purely based on my knowledge of them as my sisters who still depend on the small comforts life has to offer as daughters of a gentleman." She was surprised that she did not feel offended by his words.

"And yet you made the decision to leave those comforts?" asked Darcy, glancing at her with a look Elizabeth could not decipher.

"I could not resist the adventure that awaited," said Elizabeth. She knew that was not her real reason for seeking employment but she could not very well tell him about her family's financial troubles.

"How did your father take it?" asked Darcy.

"Surprisingly well." Once again Elizabeth tried to keep her answer as succinct as possible. Most likely Darcy knew why she had decided to seek employment. Most gentlemen's daughters did not seek employment. However she was still wary of speaking with Darcy in a relatively open manner.

"And your mother?" said Darcy.

Elizabeth laughed humorlessly remembering how her mother took the news. That moment felt like a lifetime ago, she had been on the precipice of taking the greatest leap of faith she most likely would ever take. And even with all that had transpired at Pemberley she would still take the leap.

"Your mother did not take it very well then?" said Darcy.

Elizabeth nodded, "My mother could not have been more displeased. I think she is still displeased but she has learned to live with it."

"I suppose it is not easy for a parent to see their child leaving home. After all you are entrusting the world with your most precious creation," said Darcy. He looked like he wanted to continue but thought better of it. It was unfortunate as Elizabeth guessed his statement had been in reference to his own children. She wanted to hear him say more about them not just in reference to their academic qualities.

"I cannot argue with that, sir," said Elizabeth.

The pair fell into a surprisingly comfortable silence punctuated by the crunch of gravel as they walked further from the house and along the tree-lined lane that led to the perimeter of the estate. Elizabeth reflected further on Darcy's words regarding her mother. She had only ever focused on her mother's obsession with marrying her and her sisters off, so everything Mrs Bennet did was simply an extension of that. She had not stopped to consider that in the case of Elizabeth leaving there may have been more driving her mother's reaction than how her actions would impact their social standing. After all, before she had departed Mrs Bennet had been uncharacteristically fussy over Elizabeth and the hug they had shared had expressed a lot of what Mrs Bennet had not been able to say. It was strange to think that Darcy had induced this reflection.

"Pemberley has been in the Darcy family for seven generations," said Darcy, bringing Elizabeth to the present. "It has certainly changed over the years and in my lifetime I have been privileged to see its growth. Its stewardship is not something to be taken lightly."

Elizabeth had primed her ears for more, but as usual she was left wanting as Darcy did not elaborate. Elizabeth took this as a hint that perhaps now they were going to discuss the topic they had been circling.

Once again Elizabeth felt on the verge of saying something that could either make or break their conversation and knew she had to take care in what she said. Unlike two nights prior when her attempt had disintegrated into chaos, she needed to make this moment count.

"Firstly sir, let me start by apologising for my comments to you concerning your children. They were undeserved. As I said when we last met, your kids love you and they missed you terribly when you were away," said Elizabeth who looked at Darcy earnestly, spurred on by adrenaline.

Darcy only nodded and said, "If I remember correctly, your acknowledgement of their love for me was followed by the statement that they engaged better in their lessons while I was away."

Elizabeth sighed, hating how upon reflection she realised how tactless she had been in addressing this issue with Darcy. As he was already antagonistic, her comments had only served to antagonise him further. "Perhaps I could have said that without making it sound as if what you had been doing prior to my arrival had been useless," said Elizabeth.

"Is that not what you have been saying or atleast showing in your actions?" asked Darcy with a raised brow.

Elizabeth had to bite the inside of her cheek to refrain from casting a retort about how so far she had been given no choice but to act rebellious in light of Darcy's dictatorial ways.

"I have only been advocating for the children, sir," said Elizabeth hoping she at least sounded remorseful even though she did not believe any of her actions had not been warranted.

"And as I said before, I have also been acting in the best interests of my children," said Darcy matter of factly.

Trying to salvage a conversation she could feel teetering on the edge of an argument she played the one card she knew might make Darcy see reason.

"Did you not say your sister and your aunt believe we can reach a compromise about the children's lessons?" said Elizabeth.

Darcy was silent for a moment, "Can we?"

Elizabeth let out a frustrated sigh which was met by a surprising chuckle from Darcy which Elizabeth found disarming as it transformed his features for a moment making him look years younger than he always presented himself and drawing her eye to the slight dimple in his right cheek. The sight was too much to witness that it took Elizabeth a moment to realise Darcy was still speaking.

"Forgive me Miss Bennet, but I posit the question because we both seem to have only succeeded at one thing, arguing about the very thing we both claim to care so much about," said Darcy. He had now resumed his general sternness but there were remnants of the strange humour he seemed to derive from the situation.

Tempted as she was to justify why they always seemed to be at odds with each other, Elizabeth instead took the more rational approach, "Would it be enough for me to say that for the sake of the children I will try to do better?"

Darcy paused considering her statement. "Then I would say the same for me. Although I feel there is a "but" to follow your statement."

At this, Elizabeth could not help chuckling at how Darcy was able to read her.

"But, it would be on the condition that I am allowed some input into the children's education. Perhaps I may be seen to be overstepping boundaries but as I have expressed before, I care about your children, sir. And I want to see them thrive and grow as I know you also do. And to do that, a blending of both our methods will be necessary," said Elizabeth. She was anxious for his reaction knowing how she always seemed to offend him. In truth, she had thought his methods should be done away with completely but she wouldn't risk that blatant offence.

Darcy contemplated her words for a while as they continued walking. Looking back she could no longer see the house and wondered how far they had walked. The trees had now given way to an open field which stretched on beyond what the eye could see.

"I know your views on the way I parent my children are not favourable, but have you ever wondered why I might be the way I am with them? Or are you so determined to paint me the villain?" said Darcy. He did not allow her an opportunity to respond though. "As I said for the sake of the children, I am willing to have your input into their curriculum and schedule. Do understand that I will not just accept changes for the sake of appeasing you. I need to know the benefit of the change."

Despite Darcy's anxious look, Elizabeth could not help her smile, relief at being able to work with rather than against Darcy overwhelming her. She could already picture the difference it would make to be aligned and not to mention how much she looked forward to not arguing with or antagonising the other at each turn. Her spirit enjoyed a challenge but she could only fight for so long.

"Well, firstly in regards to the schedule," said Elizabeth feeling empowered to speak on the subject even when Darcy looked like he was regretting his decision.

The pair continued their discussion as they circled back to the house, the east wing coming into view. Although willing to hear the other out, or atleast Darcy was willing to hear Elizabeth's ideas but was not as forthcoming in terms of how he would compromise, either party felt the best approach was to tread carefully. Elizabeth was not certain but she believed that Darcy would keep his word to review the schedule and curriculum to infuse more of her suggestions. She also made sure she suggested things that he would not be averse to. That did not mean she did not see his jaw tensing a few times when she became excitable at the prospect of teaching the children outside or having more practical lessons. Elizabeth reasoned that once Darcy settled into the proposed new normal, he would be more willing to listen to other ideas she had.

When Elizabeth finally returned to the children, well past their afternoon meal, she looked forward to what was to come. She was not naive enough to believe that Darcy was now a changed man nor that she would not find ways to unfortunately aggravate him, but she was happy that she would be feeling less dread the next time she was summoned to meet him. She would still be nervous for he was a hard man to read and therefore anticipate what to expect but he seemed a man of integrity and she relied on this small comfort to console her about him not reneging on his promises.

The only glaring omissions from their discussion was any apologies or acknowledgement of their almost kiss. Or was it kisses? Elizabeth had apologised about her comments concerning his children but not for anything else she had said to him. Darcy had not so much as said sorry for his many accusations levelled towards her. Elizabeth though could live with this as long as Darcy kept to his word to allow her to make an input when it came to the children. Apologies and acknowledgements of near kisses were trivial to the win Elizabeth felt she had made.

By the time Elizabeth had retreated to her room she was looking forward to some much-needed rest. She penned a letter to Jane relaying the eventualities of the day. She had to cross out the brief line about how Darcy had looked after the brief chuckle. She had drifted off for a moment and found that sentence on paper that when she realised this she panicked, ripping the letter to shreds and looking over her shoulder as if she would find Darcy standing at her door glaring at her for daring to have such thoughts. After this embarrassing episode, and penning another letter which she took meticulous care to not ruin with stray thoughts, Elizabeth finally settled in her bed and closed her eyes hoping to cease the many thoughts that had been swirling in her mind. She mostly succeeded save for one thought that she turned over as she willed sleep to overtake her.

Niggling at her was Darcy's question, "Have you ever wondered why I might be the way I am with them?". He had not provided an answer and if Elizabeth had to guess, the response would either serve to infuriate her or ingratiate him to her. But regardless of the response Elizabeth was still set on the idea that he only needed to show more affection to his children. This would be the key for him to bridge the gap.

As she finally succumbed to sleep, little did Elizabeth know that on the other side of the house the gentleman in question was also pondering what his response to the same question would have been had he answered.

A/N: Just casually dropping a certain character's name. If you have been paying attention I have been hinting at this character and this is their first mention. I don't know how much I will focus on that side plot but just thought to give a nudge for you to look out for in future

Also had to balance this chapter because even though D & E know they need to compromise, they are far from doing this in a simple way and they are even further from becoming anything friendly. So even though I would love them to be on the same page they are both still bruised from their previous battles. See you for the next chapter which is already in the works :D