Chapter 37
"We should definitely go to concerts together more often," Rory commented, just as Logan pulled up in his driveway, agreeing yet again during their drive back from town after stealing themselves a little lunch date, that they had a remarkably similar taste in music.
Rory's carefully selected playlist had entertained them throughout this little trip of theirs, adding a little extra spark of mystery to Logan. He loved seeing Rory's layers, and by listening to her music and her favorite movies he was surprised more often than not, but mostly in a good way or at least in a way that was sheer amazement on how he'd stumbled upon something like that.
Her superficial innocence, or at least the ability to come off innocent, but inside be more like him than many realized, was one of the major draws to him, something about that being inherently sexy. Logan had seen Rory's vixen side in the bedroom, her love for crazy movies, including some belonging to the horror genre, her love for punk-rock while at the same time appreciating also pop and classical pieces, her contrasting wardrobe she wore at home compared, loose, linen and often braless, to the conservative librarian look she wore at work, having by now looked over her pictures from Chilton.
"We should," Logan replied. "Though it might take some getting used to having hardly any selection around here," he added.
"Missing London already, chap?" Rory teased in a playful British accent, and stretched out her arm to his neck and gently massaged the back of his hair.
"Just Soho. Not the people," Logan added, not wanting her to take offense.
There were little glimpses of London he missed. The shops for example. He liked the food in his house to be a lot less processed than the generic stuff tended to be here. While he could no-doubt find the best sustainable produce here too, cooking everything from scratch to the level he was accustomed to for four to five people every day several days a week, was beginning to tire him. There weren't a lot of great places to order in from, and those that they had - their menus he'd already largely memorized. Freeport and the house just outside of Freeport were great for a holiday, but would they be enough for him long term? Would they be enough for his kids?
"Well, I still miss the bustle of NYC, or even Boston sometimes. Not that I've ever been much for going 'clubbing'," Rory shared, using air quotes. Hartford wasn't very exciting either, though indeed there was already a little more to do compared to this place. Honestly, she wasn't even so much concerned about Logan and her living in separate places, him here and her in Hartford, but Logan not finding that enough either. It would've been seemingly so easy for him to take on some big city - and that would distance them even more, she was sure of it. But she'd made a pact with herself, not to worry about what would happen come fall too much, and most of the time she was doing well on the matter.
Logan glanced at the time, and he seemed to not be in a hurry.
"Well, this isn't an impossible distance from anywhere, neither is Hartford. I mean - it's the first summer we haven't been traveling, either alone or in a group," Logan exhaled.
"I guess not…," Rory exhaled in response.
"I do want to take you out one time. Just the two of us. To some great concert… give you some Huntzberger treatment," Logan replied, huskily, meaning the latter in a humorous way rather than seriously. But he did mean VIP treatment.
"Not that I would mind that. But just spending a night with you, at a concert would be enough. I'm really not that hard to please. As long as there is food, of course," Rory said.
"You are easy to please," Logan commented.
"Is that a bad thing?" Rory joked.
"No. And I guess I can just cancel the Birkin order," Logan said, teasingly.
"Ah!" Rory exclaimed, hitting his shoulder playfully.
"Didn't order one. Not yet anyways," Logan replied, cheekily, having a feeling that fancy designer items were not the way to impress someone like Rory. She was 'the content over the exterior' kind of woman who would likely appreciate a good book.
"You better not," Rory added, not wanting Logan to go throwing his money around for her sake. Sure, gestures - like flowers, food, wine - were fine, but she could buy her own Birkin if she felt like it.
Logan laughed, loving this side about her.
"So, any other plans for today?" Rory inquired, catching him checking his watch again.
"Mostly just convincing myself not to go listen in on Eléa's therapy session. I haven't, obviously. But I can't deny, I've been tempted," Logan confessed, knowing the session was ongoing upstairs as they spoke and was due to last for another 20 minutes. He'd learned enough to usually just make himself scarce and suggest the same to the boys, so she would feel more privacy. The walls weren't paper thin, but still… one could hear glimpses if one were to, say, pass her room or be getting something from the laundry closet in the adjacent room.
"So, she's still presenting you with the closed book version of herself?" Rory inquired.
"That's one way to put it," Logan replied. "I just don't know what to do with her. And… I feel like a complete wuss complaining to you about all of these things. I'm never usually like this. I am so used to being confident and knowing, and recently all I feel since I've been around you is this guy who's sad and lost," Logan added.
"You know, some women might see it as you being able to be vulnerable. Which is more than could be said for most men," Rory said, thinking of Tucker in the back of her mind.
"Yes, but I don't want this thing between us to be just about my poor parenting and you as my sounding block," Logan complained. "Yet, I keep coming to you with my issues," he added.
"I don't mind that you talk about what's going on. And if any of it makes sense, all for the better. You don't have to worry about this…," Rory assured.
"I'm thinking about going back to seeing a therapist myself," Logan commented after a little bit of silence.
"I think that's good," Rory replied, hesitantly. "Not that I feel like you have to, or that you're a mess… to me you seem like a man, a dad, who's been through a major change in his life and is going through a learning curve. You're adjusting, but if you think that's what you need to do, then go for it," Rory encouraged.
"I just don't want you to think that I'm slipping off to Portland twice a week for something sketchy, you know. Or if I don't talk to you about all of it anymore, that it's not because I'm hiding anything or distrusting…," Logan explained.
"Of course, not," Rory replied. "Just know that you still can… talk to me, I mean," she added.
"I don't deserve you," Logan exhaled, and pressed his forehead against hers before kissing her.
"Hey, I'm not perfect either. Remember my little panicky moment a little while back?" Rory tried to joke to lighten the mood, as the kiss broke.
"Your cute panicky moment?" Logan replied.
"There was nothing cute about it," Rory argued, feeling embarrassed of the whole thing.
"Have you gotten anything out of Corinne so far?" Logan inquired, his mind being unable to pull himself very far from the kids as they sat where they did.
"Whenever she's in Boston, I'm happy if she remembers me at all," Rory shared, admitting how she was a little hurt by it. "She's always busy when she's there. Her friends and family, also on Tucker's side…," she added.
"I'm sure that's not true," Logan said, wanting to comfort her.
Rory rolled her eyes, knowing this a little better than he did.
"What about Theo?" Rory asked.
"I mean, he didn't spell it out for me, but I think it could've been just about the fact that maybe he wasn't ready? Or I don't know. He said something about it being hard to try to live up to Liam… and me," Logan confessed, adding the latter humbly.
"Live up to…?" Rory repeated, feeling a little confused. "Oh," she reacted, getting finally that Logan had meant that in terms of women.
"Yeah," Logan sighed.
"So, she tried something?" Rory reflected, referring to her daughter. It was not a thought she'd fully processed before.
"I don't know. It could just be that he… for whatever reason… rejected her," Logan shared his best theory.
"Right," Rory sighed, feeling now a little guilty herself that she hadn't pushed Corinne to talk more. But via phone it wasn't the easiest thing to do.
"I hope they sort it out. I'd hate it to make things awkward," Logan said.
"I think it might be too late for that," Rory sighed, trying to imagine what her daughter must've been feeling had this been the case.
"She's young," Logan suggested.
"Yeah, she is," Rory exhaled, wanting to remain hopeful that was enough.
"I hope I can talk to Theo again… there are a few things I want to say to him, and I've been trying to think of a good way to get him alone and out of the house like I had a chance with Liam… but when it comes to Corinne, I hope that I can get him to apologize and make some effort to smooth things over at least," Logan explained.
"You shouldn't push it," Rory argued. "Sometimes it's just too embarrassing…," she added.
"Maybe," Logan replied, despite maintaining his opinion on the topic. He couldn't see that talking to him hurt anything. In fact, he was willing to go make some wild guesses around him, hoping to make him talk.
"Okay, as much fun as this if," Rory began, half-jokingly, and truly enjoying his company no matter what subject they were on, and continued, "I gotta go pee. I'll see you later?" Rory suggested, having been crossing her legs for a while now.
"Yeah," Logan agreed and gave her another little peck, and remained in the car for now, wanting to kill some time before going back inside.
He wished more of their conversations were fun and carefree. Sure, he couldn't really complain as their sex life really wasn't complaint-worthy. But the heaviness of their discussions almost made him feel like sometimes they were parents first and lovers second. He'd been parents with Whitney, though mostly it had been Whitney who'd been the parent while he just established himself in his line of work. He wasn't sure if he was balancing things right - was he supposed to hold the self-pity in and just not discuss things with Rory?
His thoughts were interrupted by an incoming call from a number he didn't recognize. But since he'd been meeting a lot of new people recently, he answered the call regardless.
"This is Logan," he said confidently.
"Rory? Who's this?" the voice asked, sounding a little confused.
It was then Logan realized that Rory's phone must've stayed connected with his car's Bluetooth.
"Hello?!" the voice asked again more sternly.
"Yeah, I'm sorry. Rory isn't here right now, I'll disconnect and you can try her again, okay? Bye," Logan replied, and disconnected the call rapidly.
He couldn't be sure, but if he was right - he'd just had Tucker on the phone.