Disclaimer: I do not own any of the material appearing in this story. The OC's belong to their respective owners.

Sometime Before Deadpool Joined JINXY and Co

"Hmhmhmhm~" Deadpool hummed as he was dangling his feet over a rooftop, looking through his phone. "Hmm?" He looked up at the screen. "Ah, hello there! What's up? What's that? You watched the RWBY Volume 9 trailer and you decided to come here and various other RWBY fanfics for comfort? Of course you have!"

He let out a chuckle. "Now, you might be wondering how I managed to convince Nan to make a Gaiden chapter all about me. Weeeeeell, it didn't take much to convince him!"

"Make the next Gaiden chapter all about me or so help me, I will put a bullet between your eyes!"

"You're bluffing. If you actually kill me, then who will write SRS?"

"Oh please, I can definitely pull a 1-Up out of my ass and shove it in your throat to revive you. Easy!"

"...Gross, but still, you're bluffing. I ain't budging."

"I'm going to count to three! One! Two! …Two and a half! …Two and three quarters… seriously, you're not budging?"

"You replaced your actual gun with a toy and that's gonna pop out confetti."

"OH YEAH? IF YOU THINK I'M STUPID ENOUGH TO DO THAT-"

Click!

*Confetti noises*

"You're absolutely right!" Deadpool said. "However, I know of something that can make you talk."

"Oh yeah?"

"Make a Gaiden chapter all about me… or, heheheh, I'll convince your pal Yoshi to come over and he'll clobber you in Smash with his main. And you know exactly what I'm talking about."

"YOU WOULDN'T DARE!"

"Oh, wouldn't I~?"

Deadpool chuckled, pulling out a photo of Dedede smashing Corrin with his Jet Hammer. "He gets really salty when that moment gets brought up!"

Deadpool put it away. "Now then! You might be wondering what I'm doing here! After all, you last saw me getting pulled in by Cable when I announced Forgotten Land! …Okay, technically, my last appearance was in Forgotten Land and helped Chiaki get back on her feet, but the subtitle says "Sometime before I joined JINXY and Co" so, shhhhh!"

He let out another chuckle. "Anywho! So you know that Cable pulled me back. But you might be wondering "Deadpool, what are you up to"? Well, I'm so glad you asked!"

Deadpool brought out a picture of Apocalypse. "You see this wrinkled old fart? That, my dear boys and girls, is Apocalypse. And he's looking into destroying the multiverse! We can't have that now, can we? So, with the help of the X-Men, the Avengers, the Fantastic Four, the Eternals, no, not the shitty MCU version. The REAL Eternals! And of course, me and Cable. We're taking care of anomalies where Apocalypse might come in and make everyone's lives a living hell!"

"Wade, the target is approaching."

"Oh, that's my cue!" Deadpool got into position, stretching. "Time to rock and roll! …Oh, and by the way, if you're curious, our Mister Fantastic is not played by John Krasinski. I know! I'm disappointed too!"

He pulled out his phone. "Now then, let's get some motherfuckin' pop culture music in this shit! Press the play button aaaand here we go!"

BGM: Light 'Em Up (Fall Out Boy)

Deadpool turned around and free fell toward the road. He quickly turned around as he slammed down onto a car that was driving by. He quickly cut open the roof and dropped down, seeing a couple of masked men. "Hey guys, mind if I drop in?" He asked as he pulled out his guns and shot them dead, the driver's foot hitting the accelerator and striking the van in front of him.

He quickly was launched and went into the van, and in a slow motion moment, he shot everyone in the van as he landed on top of the van, leaping over toward a pick up truck.

"Oddly convenient that they're all lined up for me!" He said as he climbed over the top of the truck and backflipped, shooting the engine where the truck exploded and flipped over him as it landed on top of a few other cars, causing a massive pile up.

A helicopter flew over to him as Deadpool switched to his katana blades as the helicopter opened fire as Deadpool quickly parried the bullets and cut through them like butter until the helicopter's guns ran out of ammo. "Hey, what do you know! They do run out of ammo! SUCK IT, HOLLYWOOD!" He said as he threw one of his katanas into the tail of the helicopter, causing it to spin uncontrollably as Deadpool ran over, hopping on a hoverboard and gaining speed as the helicopter exploded behind him as he kicked the hoverboard into a masked man's throat, then shooting him in the head for good measure.

Deadpool's katana landed in his hand from the explosion as he turned around to see a mech approaching him as it started to open fire at him via rail gun, but Deadpool ran and slid near a manhole cover, picking it up and using it as a shield before he threw it like Captain America and struck the mech in the crotch. "Ooooh! That was meant for the knee!"

The mech angrily shot cannonballs at him as Deadpool hopped into the sewer, and then came back up from behind it. "Achilles Heel shot!" He slashed the mech, causing it to fall over on it's stomach. "Huh! I didn't think that would work."

He walked over to the mech and impaled the heart of the giant mech with his katanas, then he hopped off as it started to static, walking away from it.

"Mission accompli-"

BOOOOOOM!

End BGM

The resulting explosion was enough to level an entire city block, including the town square.

"Oooooow…"

Deadpool shook off the soot. "Now how's that for a dynamic introduction in SRS! I give that a ten out of a ten! …What? What do you mean that's just personal bias from me? I thought it was flawless!"

Cable walked by. "I give that a five out of a ten."

"Oh, don't be such a spoil sport!"

"You leveled a whole city block!"

"Naaaah, that building over there is still standing!" He said, pointing to it. "See? The general hospital is still-"

It collapsed.

"...That hospital was scheduled to collapse before we got here."

"Uh-huh… and with sick patients in there?"

"What? Demolitions experts aren't perfect!"

"Whatever." Cable pulled out his machine. "Now then, the anomaly is right here, so at least now I can have some peace and quiet. Mostly."

"I wonder…" Deadpool looked at a hoverboard and started to spin around with it. "WOOOHOOOOOOOO!"

"Idiot." Cable grumbled as he immediately went to work, where he started typing in codes where the anomaly started to distort around him. "Don't even think about it." He said, pressing a button as an electric field surrounded the anomaly and fired lightning bolts at it to destroy it. "Another world saved."

"Whoooooa…" Deadpool dizzily got off and stumbled about. "Woooow, there's so many colorful buttons on that machine… there's thousaaaaands of them!"

"Wade. Focus."

"Heeeeey, what does this button do?" Deadpool dizzily asked, pressing a button.

"NO, DON-" He would see a star going supernova in the distance before fizzling out. "DAMMIT WADE!"

"Woo! Huh buh buh buh buh!" He shook his head. "Okay, did a star go supernova?"

"No! You blew up a damn world!"

"I blew up a world? Why do you even have that button?"

"That doesn't matter!"

"What world did I blow up?"

"According to my calculations… you blew up the Teen Titans!"

Deadpool gasped. "The Teen Titans?! Oh no! …Wait, which version?"

"The one where they're chibified."

"Oh! Okay, nothing of value was lost. I think I just saved Cartoon Network too!"

"WADE, YOU STILL KILLED INNOCENT LIVES IN THAT WORLD!"

"Geez, dude, you're acting like I blew up the Powerpuff Girls!"

"Never mind that! Let's go. This world is safe from Apocalypse."

"And speaking of the Powerpuff Girls, apparently they're getting a reboot! Which is odd considering the 2016 version was a reboot… so I have to ask. How the hell do you reboot a reboot? And what do you call that anyway? An unboot? A deboot? Reboot 2: Electric Reboot-aloo? Sixteen more reboots? I want to-"

"I'll "reboot" this boot up your ass if you don't shut up."

"Aw, Cable. You're acting like Ant-Man went straight up your-" Cable gave him a death glare. "Okay! Shutting up now!" He said. "...Still a missed opportunity to kill Thanos like that in Endgame, I'm just sayin'..."

"Let's go." He pressed a button as a portal opened up.

"Alriiiiight! Let's go!" Deadpool cheered as they hopped in. "Pop Culture Migraine Tunnel, let's rock and-"

"No!"

Once on the other side…

"Aw come on! Did we have to timeskip that?" Deadpool grumbled.

"Tch… this universe isn't worth saving, but it's still a universe saved from Apocalypse. This won't take long."

"Yeesh, this universe is just so… mellow and melancholy."

"Braaaaains…"

"Hmm?" Deadpool turned his head to see a zombie Ruby approaching them. "Oh hey Ruby." He turned around to look back at Cable.

Metal Gear "!" Sound

"Do my eyes deceive me?" Deadpool turned around to look back at the zombified Ruby. "Oh my stars, we are in that scrapped What If universe!" He immediately pulled out his phone and quickly did a selfie with Ruby. "Selfie~!"

"...Now do a selfie of you getting your brains eaten by me."

"Hahahahaha!" Deadpool shoved her aside. "No thanks. I may be stupid, but I'm not that stupid!"

"Wade, don't play with the zombies."

"So, my curious readers, you might be wondering what I'm talking about. Weeeeeeell, there was going to be a What If chapter of a zombie apocalypse that infects everyone and a handful of heroes like Rosalina and company try to stop said zombie apocalypse but fail miserably. Why did they fail miserably? Cause Rosie decides to stay behind to save everyone, only she turns the whole cosmos into a zombie paradise! …Why would she do this?"

Deadpool laughed. "It's like every horror movie in existence. No one turns their brain on and they turn into a handful of idiots that get picked off one by one! Our brains must be smooth as butter for our plot to work!"

"Uuuuugh-" A zombified Weiss approached.

"I know, Weiss! It's terrible! And you want to know who's responsible for this mess?"

He pulled up a picture of Damian. "THIS IDIOT! He comes back with a zombie virus at one point, which is ironically the same virus from Marvel Zombies, and infects everyone! Yeah! This whole mess is Damian's fault!"

"It's not my fauuult… I want a braaaain…" A zombified Damian approached.

"Yeah, how about you shut the fuck up!" Deadpool shot him in the head without even looking to kill him.

Deadpool turned to Cable. "Hey Cable? Would it be better to blow this universe up? It ain't worth saving."

"There may still be a zombie who might survive the explosion and then when Apocalypse comes-"

"Oooooh very well… I guess we'll save this stinkin' universe." Deadpool grumbled. "...Wait a minute, that's how many deaths for Damian at this point? …Five hundred? …Might throw in a few extra zeroes for that."

"Extra meat…"

Deadpool looked up to see a zombified Rosalina. "Oh hey, a zombified Rosalina… OH SHIT, A ZOMBIE ROSALINA! CABLE, GET US THE HELL OUT OF HERE!"

"Luckily for us, the anomaly is taken care of." He opened up a portal. "Let's go."

"You're not going anywhere!"

"Oh yeah? I have the power of plot armor and anime by my side… and now if you'll excuse me!" Deadpool quickly dove into the portal after Cable calmly walked in as they popped up at the other side.

"Phew! Made it! And I've always wanted to say tha-" Zombie hands grabbed a hold of him. "Ack! Hey! HEY!" Deadpool cut off zombie Rosalina's arms and shoved them into her mouth, kicking her away. "Eat yourself, you cosmic zombie!"

He turned to Cable. "Are you sure you still don't want to blow it up?"

"No."

"Aww…"

Cable walked around. "The anomaly is close by."

"Alright, this won't take long at all!"

"...Who the hell are you two?"

The two turned to see a woman in armor approaching them, and there was a Pikachu accompanying her. The armor was white and had an orange arm cannon. She had a blue visor as the armor had a blue trim to it.

"Ooooh, we're in that universe!" Deadpool said, pulling out his phone. "Let's see here… do I go for the cliche song or do I go for something interesting-"

BGM: Careless Whisper (George Michael)

"Ah, screw it. I was already thinking it!" He said as Deadpool wrapped his arm around her. "Sooooo, you been around often~?"

"...What the hell are you doing?"

Deadpool smirked, taking off her helmet. "My my, Chell! That scar makes you absolutely radiant~! Rrrrow!"

"Feel free to destroy his liver." Cable said.

"Gladly."

"Wait, wha-" The arm cannon was shoved into his gut and received a fully charged Plasma Beam to his liver. "AAAAAAARGH!"

End BGM

Chell kicked him down and approached Cable. "Explain yourself. Who are you two?"

"Uuuugh…" Deadpool painfully raised a finger. "I… did tease that Chell shot me down, but I didn't think Cable gave her the green light…!" His arm fell limp. "Ooooooow…"

"I'm Cable and that idiot you just destroyed is Wade Wilson, AKA Deadpool. We're on a mission."

"Okay, what's your mission?"

"To destroy these anomalies in case if Apocalypse comes. We're sealing them up so he won't show up and take over this universe."

"Who's Apocalypse?"

"Do you want me to explain it or do you want me to pull up the Wikipedia page…? I feel like that's faster…" Deadpool groaned.

"Basically, in a nutshell, he has a god complex and has immortality. He can alter his body to enhance himself and transform his limbs into any weapon he can think of. He can regenerate his body and-"

"All I'm hearing is another guy on top of the food chain about to be knocked down to reality by yours truly." Chell smirked.

"He'll kill you."

"Not if I can kill him first. I've faced tons of enemies who think they could kill me and I've killed them every time. I can probably destroy you with one arm tied behind my back. After all, I've been raised by Raven Beak, I'm sure I can handle you and your red suited friend."

Cable smirked. "I like you. You got spirit."

"While I'm scoffing at the idea of this "Apocalypse" showing his ugly mug in my universe, and hell, he sounds like a fun challenge, I'll let you do your thing."

"Thank you." Cable said as he went right to work as Deadpool got up and shook it off, then looked at Pikachu.

"...You know what you need? A detective hat and being voiced by yours truly."

"Pika?" Pikachu tilted his head.

"Aaaand done. This one was rather weak, but it would have been stronger over time." Cable turned around. "Madame." He opened up a portal as he and Deadpool walked in, the portal closing behind them.

"Pika Pika?"

"Hell if I know… those guys were weird."

Meanwhile…

BGM: Hau'oli City - Day (Pokemon Sun/Moon)

"Huh… is there an anomaly here in Alola of all places?" Deadpool asked.

"No, we went into a different portal by mistake. I'm detecting no anomalies here." Cable said as he looked into it. "...That's peculiar."

"What is it?"

"It says here Apocalypse was here in this universe, but he's been defeated… odd, apparently he had a team."

"Who is it then?"

"Um… some rag tag group of misfits called The Malevolent Seven or something."

"Malevolent Seven?" Deadpool gasped. "Ooooh, we're in that universe! I wonder if I'll find my doppleganger here!"

"Is that who I think it is!" A voice exclaimed as Deadpool turned his head to see a Deadpool approaching him.

"Sabrinaverse Deadpool!"

"SRS Deadpool!"

"...Just when I thought one was bad enough." Cable groaned as he tried to get the portal open. He turned his head to see the two Deadpools hugging. "Great, now they're bro hugging!"

"Oh man, I can't wait to show Sabrina to you!"

"Lead the way!"

"No, don't-... aaand they're gone." Cable pinched the bridge of his nose as he walked after the two.

"Hey! Sabrina! Look who it is! It's me from another universe!"

"Hmm…?" Sabrina pulled up her shades in the middle of her sunbathing. "Wade, what exactly are you talking- OH GOD THERE'S TWO OF THEM!"

"Hey, you must be that blue head that's been talked about! I have to say, you look just as gorgeous as you did when this universe had its time in the sun!" Deadpool said as he looked around. "Now where's Yuno and Minene? I wanna chat with 'em… and hey, I might wanna say hi to Rose too while I'm at-"

Cable grabbed him by the throat. "Oh no, you don't! You're coming with me!" He said as he dragged him away.

"N-no! No! Ack! Aw come on…! I wanted to say hi to Sabrina's family! …You are such a cockblocker, you know that!"

Sabrina immediately pulled out her phone. "Hello, Aria? It's me… break out the red wine, I'm gonna need it."

"Oh, I'm sure whatever it is, you're fine."

"Two Deadpools."

"...Breaking out the bottle. Want me to invite Xarina?"

"Yes."

"Will do!"

End BGM

"You suck, you know that?" Deadpool asked as they walked out from a portal.

"Yes, I get that a lot." He responded as he set up shop.

Deadpool walked off with a grumble, sitting down on a rock. "Alright, what to do to pass the time… I gotta take my frustrations out on someone."

"Hey, what do you think you're doing?"

"Hmm?" Deadpool turned his head to see Dark Ruby approaching.

"You're sitting on my rock, asshole!"

"Oh, we're in a universe where Dark Ruby is alive… wait a second!" He turned to the screen. "Nan, did you gift wrap a "Dark Ruby is about to die" present for me? Aw, you shouldn't have!"

"What exactly are you-"

"Wait wait wait! Before I kill you-" Deadpool immediately took off running, and then came back in a training room like area. "There we go!"

"Wait… what the fuck is… what's with that health bar? What's with the bars on the ground… and why is everything so gree-"

"HEALTH BAR IN YOUR FACE!" Deadpool smacked her in the head with it.

"OOOOF!"

"Feel the looooove of the hyper combo~!" Deadpool pulled up a second bar and smacked her in the face. "AND IT'S A HOOOOOME RUUUUUUUUUN!" He swung it into her like a baseball bat and sent her flying, complete with an explosion. "This is the hyper combo~!"

Dark Ruby got up, growling and holding on to her shoulder. "You think that was funny?!"

"I'm sure the readers are laughing!"

"RRRGH! DIIIIIE!" Dark Ruby lunged at him, only to get her head cut clean off by him as he held her head in his hand while wearing a Shakespeare mask.

"To be or not to be… that is the question!" He said before tossing the head behind her and shot her head in the face multiple times until nothing remained at all.

Deadpool blew the smoke coming from his guns. "There. Now I have my "Kill Dark Ruby" quota of the day all situated." He said.

"Did you have to go all out against her?" Cable asked.

"Cable. Buddy. Have you read the whole long winded Dark Ruby arc that started since RWBY Uprising? She had it coming!"

"I'll take your word for it."

"Bitch totally should have died in RWBY Galaxy… ugh, plot armors, am I right?"

"Again, I'll take your word for it." He said as he opened up a portal as he and Deadpool walked in.

As they were traveling through, Deadpool looked through a script. "Let's see… I should totally be making my way into a random portal by now that leads me straight for JINXY and Co… but when does it-"

Suddenly, a portal appeared right above Deadpool, sucking him in and leaving Cable by himself.

"Wade? Wade! …He'll be fine." He said.

"WHAT TEAM!"

"WILDCATS!"

"WHAT TEAM!"

"WILDCATS!"

"Oh god dammit!" Cable growled.

With Deadpool…

"WAAAAAAAH!" Deadpool yelled. "And now I'm heading over to where we are in the present! Now you guys know what I've been up to! See you arooooouuuuund!" He cried as he went through a portal and slammed right into Dyna Blade, causing her to screech in surprise.

"Whew, thanks for the ride!"

Ibuki: Pffft! Now she died by Deadpool! That's hilarious!

It'd be a missed opportunity if he didn't!