Author's note
Sorry for a later update today; I've been pretty busy. But I promise, it's worth the wait! Prepare the trumpets for a grand entrance!
Chapter 24
A silhouette materialises in the doorway.
A towering figure, with flowing hair.
"Are you Rob's ghost?" I squeak.
Rob chokes from behind me, "I'm still alive!"
I squint harder at the doorway, against the sinking sun.
The figure has no arms.
"Rubis!" I squeal in ecstasy, "You're Rubis's ghost!"
"I'm not a ghost, you idiot." He says, in the sensual, baritone voice I have missed so much.
"Have you come to rescue me?" I say.
I give him my best damsel-in-distress look.
"I don't know how you want me to do that." He scoffs, "If you hadn't noticed, my arms were eaten by goths."
"Quickly!" I urge, hopping from foot to foot on my soda tower.
"What about me?" Rob gargles desperately from his surfboard.
I glance between my two lovers. Fate is cruel; making me choose between them. I can be with Rob in the afterlife, or I can survive with what might be a mirage of Rubis.
Only one option involves jumping into a lake of acid.
I make my decision.
Rubis has come to save me – it's meant to be!
But how can he pull me up with no arms?
An idea strikes.
I say, "Rubpunzel! Rubpunzel! Let down your hair!"
Rubis makes a face of disgust, then sighs and crouches in the doorway.
His hair flows down to me, like an angel extending a gracious hand.
I grab on tightly and Rubis hauls me up, just as acid bubbles over the last pack of soda.
With Rubis' help, I scramble back to ground-level. I lay, wracked with burning pain, with my head on his chest.
"Heeelp!" Rob wails.
He has taken off his sneakers and paddles with them towards us.
He extends a skeletal hand, dripping with molten flesh, for me to pull him to safety.
"I'm sorry, Rob." I say, "I wish it didn't have to be this way."
"You pushed me for no reason, dude!"
"You would never have made it, anyway." I explain, regretfully.
"I can still make it!" He retorts, "Just pull me up with you!"
"You're delirious." I say patiently, "I can't help you. I'm with Rubis now."
I stroke Rubis' face affectionately.
"Not radical." Wheezes Rob, "Not radical at all, brahhh..."
The last word transitions into a choking sob, as the acid finally corrodes his surfboard. He sinks into the vibrant, green ooze.
"That won't be a pretty body for the hovercraft to recover." Rubis comments, "If you need some space to grieve, I'll be over-"
"Oh, Rubis!" I exclaim, "I'm so happy you're alive! I never would have moved on if I knew you were nearby, and returning to me within days!"
I wrap him in a jubilant hug as we lay on the ground. His expression implies discomfort, but he doesn't pull me off him, so I hug him tighter and bury my face in his neck.
"How did you know I needed a knight in shining armour?" I ask.
My words are muffled by his sweet-smelling shirt. I don't need him to answer – he must have been following me, all this time… It could only have been the presence of another alpha male – Rob – that prevented him from returning to my side.
Rubis says, "I didn't come here to save you. I was just seeing if there were any battered sausages left in the chippy next-door. There weren't, but my mood was lifted again when I heard your screams of pain."
"Because you were so pleased I was still alive, and you wanted to rescue me?"
"I wanted to watch."
I'm too caught up in the moment to question him further.
Rubis says, "We should get somewhere sheltered. I'm not much use in a fight in this condition."
"Yeah, we should." I say.
Neither of us moves.
"You can start by getting off me." Says Rubis.
"Oh. Right." I say, "Ten more minutes, babe?"
"No." Rubis snaps. He tries to tip me off of him. I roll aside before he hurts himself.
"Time for snuggles later, then." I sigh mournfully.
I smile to myself. The three most important things in the world are still mostly intact. Myself, Rubis and the PS6 on my back.
As we walk together, Rubis asks, "Would you die for me?"
"Of course!" I reply, without hesitation.
"Sound."
"What?"
"Nowt. We should try and find another teammate."
"Why?" I ask, appalled, "You and I are the strongest competitors in here!"
"I'll say it again; I don't have any arms. The only weapons at my disposal right now are my stunning looks and the blowpipe I shot tuna with."
"Hold up; you're the one who shot Tuna?" I exclaim.
Rubis cranes his neck forward and uses his mouth to extract a blowpipe from his shirt pocket. It is loaded with a tranquiliser dart.
"Mm-hm." He mumbles, before he puts the blowpipe back, "But it only came with two darts. One left."
"So you have been following me…" I realise, blissfully, "Like a guardian angel."
"Well, Tuna had a Disney Infinity character I wanted. But that blew up with her. Curse my lapse in judgement."
At my confused expression, he says, "I mean, sure. I was stalking you and waiting for the perfect, heroic moment to swoop in and save you."
"Stalking…" I swoon, "I've never had somebody care about me as much as you."
"That is probably true, which makes it all the more sad." Rubis smirks, "Hang on, though; didn't Rob like you?"
"Oh, him. He was nothing to me, don't worry." I say.
"Not what I asked, but good to know how guilty you feel about pushing your one genuine friend into a pit of acid."
"He wasn't a friend!" I protest, "He loved me! And how is it my fault that I didn't return his feelings? I mean, he was borderline obsessive! I was having to beat off his advances with-"
Rubis hushes me.
He murmurs, "As much as I would adore to hear about you beating off, there are people up ahead, so you'll have to shut up."
"But I can whisper." I respond.
"Shh! No more talking."
I obey his forceful order, feeling suddenly hot.
We find ourselves back in the vicinity of the college where we started, standing by a set of traffic lights. One of them is bent at a forty-five degree angle, its LEDs in pieces. The other has been wrenched out of the ground entirely and lies twenty yards down the road.
What a shame… If Rubis still had arms, he could have used that as a weapon. I'm sure he could have hefted it with ease.
Across the road, the two tributes from District Nine are walking side by side – Bretta, and the boy I have been calling Yucky.
So Pinty, Salto and Elsie didn't get Bretta after all… I wonder whose cannon Rob and I heard, then.
Rubis and I duck behind a hedge to watch them.
Rubis says, "When I said teammate, I didn't exactly have these two in mind…"
We catch some of their conversation.
Bretta is saying, "-the opposite sex to me. That's like, the only requirement I have."
Yucky says, disgusted, "The feelings are not mutual, my friend."
"Since when did mutual feelings matter? I have urges, you know."
"Usually I would agree with you, but not when it comes to me!" Yucky protests, "Do you know who I am?"
"An ugly, grass-hopper-looking weed?"
"How can you call me a weed when you were jumped by three twelve-year-olds? My father, who is rich, by the way, will smite you for such an insult!"
"Enough about your minted dad, already! And for the record, year-sevens are fucking lethal. I barely escaped with my cinnamon vape!" After a short pause, Bretta adds, "And my life."
I whisper to Rubis, "Should we kill them? Only, I don't really want to… N-not because I'm scared, I just feel it wouldn't be fair to-"
Rubis interrupts, "Don't worry, I think the decision is out of our hands."
Bretta and Yucky don't see the tribute creeping up behind them.
It's Izzie.
With a spear poised in one hand, Izzie is infinitely more threatening than Bretta and Yucky combined. They don't stand a chance.
She creeps behind them and says, "Do you want to know who else is lethal?
Two shrill shrieks erupt when they turn to see her.
They immediately flee down the road.
I imagine the scenery blurring past, as the camera-view keeps pace with the running pair. Action-music will be overlaid, coming to an intense halt when Corvid steps out in front of them, from behind a fence.
Bretta and Yucky are trapped, like rabbits between a wolf and a hawk.
The Goths advance from either direction.
I can't bear to see two perfectly innocent tributes about to be slaughtered by teens playing vampires.
Yucky orders, "Split up and run!"
The two sprint in opposite directions.
Bretta barely makes it five paces before Izzie's spear lodges in her back, like a javelin. She falls flat on her face. The road darkens with blood.
Izzie approaches her at a leisurely pace.
Meanwhile, Corvid chases Yucky towards where Rubis and I are hiding.
With a huge leap forward, Corvid smacks their axe into his shoulder with a wide sweep.
He cries out and stumbles.
Corvid shoves him to the ground and presses the blunt edge of their axe into his neck.
Yucky wriggles on his back, to no avail.
"You're Cuddlybear on Discord, aren't you?" Corvid demands.
"What?" Their victim splutters.
"Answer me!"
Corvid stamps hard on Yucky's wrist. He screams.
"Yes! That's me! I am only friendly on Discord though – I have never cyberbullied anyone, if that's why you are angry!"
They say, "I knew it was you! You must know who I am – my name is literally Corvid on there!"
"I don't know… I talk to many pretty people." Yucky tries.
"You tried to groom dozens of kids!"
"It's legal where I come-"
He can't finish his sentence, because Corvid has crushed his windpipe with their heel.
They step off of him and there is a moment of silence.
Yucky, wide-eyed with fear, tries to stand up and run.
Corvid swings their axe. Once, twice, three times, until Yucky is a bloodied mess on the ground.
They keep going, shouting, "This is for every ten-year-old girl you tried to have sex with!"
The cannon blast punctuates their sentence.
Sparks fly as Corvid's axe thunks onto concrete, all the way through bone.
Across the road, Izzie has finished playing with her prey. Bretta's cannon blast sounds a few seconds later.
Eventually, Corvid looks up to see me and Rubis, crouched behind a hedge.
"You next?" They ask.
"Nah." Rubis says calmly, "We want to team up with you."
Izzie sees us and comes tearing across the road, yelling "Diiiee!"
Corvid sweeps out an arm to stop her. Izzie's spear halts a few inches from my face.
"Hey!" She protests, "Let me kill them!"
Rubis says, "Don't hurt me – I'm armless."
I chuckle, despite the situation.
"Yes, very good." Says Corvid. They explain to Izzie, "They want to team up."
"Well, we don't want them." Izzie replies, "Why haven't you killed them?"
"I want to know how the hell these two are still alive. I mean, one's got no arms, and the other is Midnight."
I puff out my chest.
I state, "Oh, it's just a minor advantage that you may be unfamiliar with, called pure, unbridled talent."
Izzie groans, "You sure we can't kill them?"
"We could do with some backup…" Corvid muses, "We still have the roadmen to take down. But these two…? Maybe we should just use them for food. Again."
Rubis asks, "By roadmen, do you mean Pinty, Salto and Elsie?"
"Yeah. Haven't you seen them parading around with vapes and puffer jackets?" Says Izzie.
Rubis says, "I saw them chasing Bretta, yeah. I assumed she died when I heard a cannon blast earlier, but it must have been someone else. Was that your doing?"
"Nope." Says Corvid, "That was Blue. She killed that lizard-guy from her own district. We only saw her walking away from the body, but she must be pretty strong to have managed it. She's another reason we could use backup."
"Sorted." Says Rubis.
"Hang on, we haven't agreed to anything." Izzie snaps.
I say, "What other choice do you have? I surrounded myself with the other strongest competitors, and they're all dead now."
Izzie says, "Yeah, we saw that in the sky. How on earth did all the Careers except Salto get themselves killed, but you didn't?"
"The Capitol stopped Greg from killing me early on – not that he would have been able to anyway." I boast, "Then I was saved twice by my guardian angel, Rubis."
"Only because I was in the area." Rubis explains, "I was really after fish and chips."
"The fish and chip shop is way out of commission." Corvid says, "I checked. Battered sausage would taste so much better than badly-cooked human arm."
"Smelt like things were frying when I was there." Rubis shrugs, apparently unfazed by the Goths consuming his dismembered limbs.
"Then it was a Capitol trick." Izzie asserts.
Corvid ponders for a second.
They ask, "Did the Capitol lure you there, so you would save Midnight?"
"Potentiamaybe." Rubis says, impassively.
"They really want Midnight alive." Izzie notes.
"And if we team with him, we might live longer, too…" Corvid mutters, "After all, what's more entertaining to the Capitol than an obnoxious fleabag driving a couple of rebels up the wall?"
"But I don't want to be driven up the wall!" Izzie whines.
Rubis counters, "Like you said, you're famous rebels. The Capitol will want to get rid of you sooner, rather than later. I'm surprised they let you get this far. We're your best hope."
"I hate to admit it-" Corvid starts.
"Please no." Izzie implores.
"-but he has a point."
She groans.
"Fine." She says, "Welcome to the team."
I extend my hand for the two to shake. Corvid rolls their eyes.
"I wouldn't want to make Rubis jealous." They say, ignoring my hand.
Izzie growls, "Just know, if you try anything, we will kill you both."
"I don't doubt it." Rubis says.
He could not sound less bothered.