The appointment was in three days.

Kristina's never heard a silence quite as loud before. It's deafening, ringing in her ears as tears fall down her face.

It was just some cramps. It was just like a heavy period.

She sits in the corner of her own bathroom. Her face is red from crying: grief that hit her like a truck. Blood stains her inner thighs, small red blotches on her tan skin. She refuses to get up, to make her way to the toilet and flush what's there down.

Molly's going to be devastated: TJ too. They've dealt with enough, and now I'm going to make it worse.

She sniffs loudly, hiccupping as a tear or two runs down her face. Her hand is a fist in front of her mouth, half-skin and half-sweater against her lips.

I did everything right: the diet, the pills, the self-care. How did this happen? How could I let this happen?

"Kristina?" there's a gentle knock at the door, "It's Amy. I'm just checking in before I go to work. You've been in there for a long time; are you okay?"

She rubs her face, wiping every tear she could, "Yeah, yeah, I'm good."

"You sure?"

"I'm sure."

"Okay…" she can hear Amy's muffled sigh, "So, um, there's this guy here for you: Dex. He's a friend of my brother's. He says he's here to watch over you or something. Did you hire a hot nurse or something for your surrogacy treatment? You know you could've just asked me-"

"Amy," Kristina's voice shakes, "he's…he's not a nurse. He works for my dad. You can let him in."

"Oh, okay, I'll go get him."

A moment of silence passes between one set of footsteps leaving her and another set approaching her.

"Kristina?" Dex asks through the wooden door, gently knocking, "Amy told me you were in here. Apparently you've been in the bathroom for a while. Are you alright?"

"I'm fine," her voice is both shaky and firm.

"Doesn't sound like it."

"I am. It's just…I need…"

"Need what? I can get it for you if you need something specific."

"No, I just…need space…"

"Did something happen?"

"Go away, Dex. Please."

"Not until you tell me what's wrong."

"You're not going to strongarm me into a confession."

"That's not my intention-"

"Just…leave me alone, okay? I just need to be left alone."

"...Okay," Dex sighs, "I'll be here when you're ready to talk."

The cool breeze from the air conditioner brushes her bare legs, the blood drying on her skin. Her shorts and underwear rest near the toilet, a disheveled pool on the off-white tile. Her eyes lock onto the white porcelain bowl, and it all comes back to her.

Tears swiftly stream down her face, and she shrinks into a ball against the dark teal wall, her knees against her chest, tightly crossed at the ankles. She buries her face in the white sleeves of her sweater, low, guttural whines leaving her lips. She eventually lowers her arms down and lets her cries bounce around the room, loud and agonizing.

"Kristina," Dex's knocks are rapid and loud, "Kristina?"

"Go away!" she shrieks.

"Are you okay?"

She breaks down further.

"Talk to me; tell me what's going on."

She tries to muffle her cries with her sweater. Dex continues to knock, calling her name. The annoyance sitting at the front of her mind fades away, her grief plaguing every other corner.

"Dex…" she croaks, trying to resist the urge to break down again, "please…"

"Do you want me to come in?"

"Dex…" she calls his name, her firmness coming out like a chant, "Dex…?"

He gently opens the bathroom door, eyes wide at the sight before him. He notes the flush redness in Kristina's face, her messy brown hair, her shell-shocked form. She tugs the sweater down further on her thighs, a look of shame gracing her face.

"What happened?" Dex drops to one knee, a hand on her shoulder. Kristina avoids his eyes, looking straight on at the appliance. Dex follows her gaze, raising his eyebrows when he pieces it together. He darts across the room and back, her bottoms in his hand.

"Come on," he wraps his arms around her once she gets dressed, helping her up. She hooks her fingers into his beige T-shirt. Her arms wrap around his neck, holding onto him for dear life, her staggered breathing heavy against the side of his face.

"Amy?" he calls, carrying Kristina in his arms and out of the bathroom, "Amy?!"

"Yeah?" Amy's eyebrows shoot up as he gets closer to her, both by the front door.

"You're going to work, right? Take us with you."

Amy speeds past nearly every slow car she encounters. Kristina's head rests in Dex's lap in the back seat, her eyes cast down towards the floor. He runs a gentle hand through her hair, combing through the tangled mess.

"It's okay…" her eyes shut tightly, trying not to cry as she hears Dex's soft coos, "You're going to be okay…"

"We're here," Amy parks in her designated spot. Dex steps out onto the asphalt, gently pulling Kristina back up into his arms. She half-heartedly buries her face in his shoulder as they rush towards the hospital.

"Hey-" TJ stops in his tracks when he sees the three, "What's wrong?"

"Kristina needs to be checked out," Amy replies, "Something's really wrong."

"Go clock in," TJ nods to Amy, who then rushes past him. He gestures for Dex to approach, "This way."

A group of nurses stand at attention when the trio walks over to them. One rushes off and returns with a wheelchair, concern plaguing each and every face.

"What happened?" TJ asks.

"She might've miscarried," the words rush out of Dex's mouth as he helps Kristina settle into the seat. He squeezes her hand when he notices tears beginning to spill over. He watches her wheeled off towards a nearby exam room, a sadness in his eyes.

"She miscarried…?" TJ asks from behind. Dex slowly turns to face him.

"I…" his throat is dry, his voice hoarse as he tries to find the words, "I'm sorry."

"Tell me what happened."

"I…found her against the wall in her bathroom; she was disheveled and distraught. I asked her what happened, and she just…stared at the toilet, and I…put two-and-two together. I don't know for sure if she did, but…it's a pretty good assumption."

"Oh…" TJ sighs, disappointment plaguing his features, "I see."

"I'm really sorry."

"It's…" he takes a deep breath, "These things happen. Miscarriage is more common than we think, especially super early on. Kristina was…maybe a week, week-and-a-half in? The chances of a miscarriage were relatively high."

"Not that I need to say it, but you're allowed to be upset. You don't have to dress it up with medical jargon."

TJ casts his eyes towards the floor for a brief moment before nodding his head at the bench closest to the exam room.

"I know," he says as they both sit down, "I know I don't have to rationalize it in such a clinical way. I mean, what I said is true, and that's just what it is, but…yeah."

Dex looks away for a moment, biting the inside of his bottom lip. He turns back when TJ continues.

"I hate this," his voice quivers slightly, "Molly and I…we've tried so hard to have our own baby, and we really thought this would work, y'know? This would be it, but…it's just another loss. And that's not even getting into Kristina," he gets to his feet, "I can't imagine how much she's hurting right now. She agreed to do this, she was checked out, everything was okay. To lose something that you carried, that was a part of you, that you…wanted…in such a heartbreaking fashion…my heart just breaks for her."

"Mine too," Dex replies, his voice cracking slightly.

"Thank you for bringing her here."

"Yeah…of course."

"God," TJ runs his hands down his face, "Molly won't take this well."

"I won't take what well?"

The two men look on in shock as Molly walks towards them, a white bag in her hand.

"Molly," TJ shakes his head, clearing his throat. He approaches her for a kiss, "what are you doing here?"

"I…came to bring you some lunch. I don't work today and I thought you'd enjoy your favorite meal from Haven Bistro," she looks between him and Dex, "Why is he here?"

"Who?" TJ looks back, "Dex?"

"Yeah. He's meant to be guarding Kristina, right? So why is he here?" Molly raises an eyebrow. Both go up when the thought enters her head. She hands TJ the meal and marches over to Dex, "What's wrong?"

"Um…" his throat is dry, his voice hoarse.

"What happened to my sister?"

"I…"

"Molly," TJ lays a hand on her shoulder.

"No," she swipes it away, "You're supposed to be her bodyguard, you're supposed to be by her side, and you're here. What happened to her?"

"Dr. Ashford?"

A nurse exits the exam room, pulling off her thin, off-white rubber gloves. Molly steps in front of her, a mix of worry and determination in her features.

"Is my sister in there?" she asks, "Kristina Corinthos-Davis, is she in there?"

"She is."

"Is she okay?"

"She's going to be fine," the nurse then looks to TJ, "We cleaned the blood on her legs and around the pelvic region, and it appears most of the fertilized egg has passed out of the body."

"Most?" TJ questions.

"There might still be some in there."

"Okay, okay," he nods slowly, "I'm sure she can be prescribed some misoprostol for the rest."

"I'll consult Dr. Navarro," the nurse nods in return before walking off. TJ and Dex exchange a look before turning to Molly.

"She…" her face began to turn pink, tears brimming from the corners of her eyes, "She miscarried?"

"Molls, I'm sorry," TJ rubs her arm.

Molly bites her bottom lip as she tries to keep her composure. The men frown at the sight, watching on as she proceeds to cry. TJ pulls her into a tight hug, stroking her hair.

"I can't…" she gasps, "Why? Why does this keep happening?!"

"I don't know, baby. I don't know."

"How did she miscarry?!"

"I'm not sure. These things just…happen. By all accounts, Kristina was doing everything right. This isn't her fault."

"This isn't fair, TJ! It's not fair!"

"It isn't."

"God…" she pulls back, wiping her nose and eyes, "I need to see her, I need to see my sister."

"She's in the exam room."

She takes hold of the doorknob, gently twisting it and walking inside. Part of her wants to break down further at the image of Kristina before her. The elder sister shoots up from her reclining position, her face dried out from crying and a clean hospital gown covering her body. They stare at one another in silence.

"...I'm sure you hate me," Kristina says, breaking the tension.

"Hate you?" Molly asks in response.

"Yeah," she sniffs, "I mean, the resident screwup lost your baby. You trusted me with something so important and I…I just ruined it."

"You…" Molly takes a deep breath, "You didn't ruin anything."

"You're just saying that."

"No," she takes Kristina's hand in her own, "I'm saying it because it's true. You did everything Dr. Navarro told you to, right?"

"Right."

"So, this just…happened. You didn't go out of your way to hurt the baby, you weren't being reckless or negligent. You did nothing wrong, Krissy."

"...I love you," Kristina spreads her arms out, wrapping them around Molly, "I love you so much."

"I love you too," Molly rubs her sister's back before pulling away, "I'm here for you if you need anything, okay? You lost something here too."

"Thank you," Kristina smiles sadly before looking down at her fingers, "I guess I really know how you feel now, huh?"

"Hmm?" Molly raises an eyebrow.

"The guilt and numbness and depression and rage you felt that all mixed into one big ball of grief…"

"That's how you feel."

"I can't help but feel that way. I mean, the baby wasn't ever mine, but-"

"You were carrying them; you have just as much a right to feel that way. It's a crappy feeling, a terrible, horrible thing to sit with and process. You saw me in the midst of it; it's not pretty. Pain like that never is. And now you're dealing with it too. You don't deserve it."

"No woman does."

Molly's eyes burn with tears as she pulls Kristina in for another hug, "I love you. I'm sorry about what happened. I'm here for you, always."

"I love you too. Thank you," they pull away from one another.

"And once Dr. Navarro gives you the all-clear, you can try again."

"...Try again?"

"I-If you want to. I'm not going to…pressure you or anything but-"

"I just…I wasn't thinking about that."

"Right, right, um…sorry. Too soon. We can talk about it…later."

"It's okay."

"I'll…give you some space," Molly backs away, slowly opening the door. She blows her sister a kiss, "I love you, Krissy."

"Love you too," Kristina blows one back as the door closes. She leans back against the exam bed, letting out a long sigh. The door opens up again, and she shoots up to see the cause.

"Hey-" Dex smiles half-heartedly. He steps closer to her, immediately caught up in a tight hug.

"Kristina…" he coos, gently rubbing her back. She buries her face into his shoulder, her hold growing tighter and tighter.

"Get me out of here, please," Kristina lets him go, wiping the last of her tears away.

"Do you want to go home?"

"Um…" the sound of a phone buzzing cuts through. Dex pulls his device out, reading the text on his lock screen.

From: Joss (11:17 AM)
I wanna spend some time w u ;)

"Sorry," he says, looking back at Kristina.

"It's okay. I'm sure it's my dad."

"No, it's just…someone. It's not important," he pockets his phone, "Um, did you want to ask me something?"

"I was…wondering if I could…stay at your place for a little bit? I need some time away from my place, just to get my mind off what happened, if that's okay with you."

"Oh…" Dex's phone buzzes again. He scans the new message, a sigh ringing within him.

From: Joss (11:18 AM)
How does ur place sound?

He glances between the device and the woman sitting before him before typing a response.

To: Joss (11:19 AM)
No, sorry.
Super busy weekend.
Maybe next time?

"Dex?"

"Sure," he puts his phone away, "you can stay."

"Thank you," she hugs him tight again, "You're the best."

"I do what I can."

"And I appreciate it."

"I'll, um, I'll get us a rideshare whenever you're discharged," Dex flashes a toothless smile before exiting the room. Kristina kicks her feet absent-mindedly as she waits, hoping that the next person who enters has the power to let her go home. She lays back down on the bed, staring straight into the overhead light. She squints at the brightness and becomes acutely aware of every dry patch on her face, all left behind from the tears she shed.

One thought lingers on her mind as the minutes pass her by: What do I do from here?