Jumping over a ruined building are five motorbikes, each gleaming white and covered in heavy weaponry. They cruise down the highway, powered by hoots running over any goblins who stand in their path. They ride over ice and snow, casting spells at or eviscerate goblins with weapons. A bloody path is carved all the way to Santa Barbara.
Harry turned towards the Hootsman and asked, "Blimey, this trek is long, where did the dragon get to?"
The Hootsman looked down, "Well, little dude, the word on the street is that the Horntail's vibe is, like, rumored to be hangin' in the ancient city of San Francisco, right on Alcatraz Island, bro!"
Ralathor looked a bit annoyed, "We could've been there if we just took the Hootsforce. And we'd have missiles and sky torpedoes of ultimate Justice.
The Hootsman responded, "Nah, dude, my motorbikes are, like, way more fun, and, you know, what's the point of takin' down a dragon if you're not doing it, like, barehanded, man?"
Only after an hour did the heroes reach the former city of Santa Barbara, it was covered full in snow and rubble, unfortunately, the ground beneath their nuclear motorbikes suddenly erupted in fire. The shout of the trio casting Arresto Momentum on the group could be heard as they were flung helplessly into the air. Due to the magic, they landed safely, or so it seemed as a group of nuclear goblins, all wielding swords rushed out at them.
The Hootsman retrieved his saxophone and battleaxe from the motorcycle wreck. He then took a big breath in and shouted in his deepest and angriest voice, "Alright, all you radioactive goblins! Listen up! The name's the Hootsman, and this post-apocalyptic playground is my turf, brah. Now, I'm gonna be super chill and give you until the count of three to, like, bail out of here with your worthless goblonic asses. Or you're gonna feel the full force of the HOOTS!
Many goblins did retreat, but one stood and rallied the rest. A black Knight wielding a massive laser sword. He yelled out in the goblin tongue, "Nak'ragor daxgarum'dok! Gul'koshar! Nak'grom!"
The goblins charged the heroes who responded with incredible violence. The trio slung spells with ferocity, shouts of curses and jinxes rode across the air as blasts of powerful and deadly magic stuck down goblin after goblin. A pair of goblins got the jump on Harry, driving their blades into his legs, he repulsed them with a spell as Ralathor ran over to heal his wounds, Ron and Hermione were working together in an incredible display of magical combat, one slinging goblins into the air and the other slamming them into the ground or blasting them with deadly fire.
Ralathor was up to his old tricks crushing swarms of goblins into cubes, meanwhile the Sword Lord of the Goblin Horde challenged the Hootsman to one on one combat, His laser sword was powerful, and perhaps if the Hootsman was a normal human, he'd be overwhelmed by the sheer power of this goblin, but he was no normal human, he gathered his strength and swung his mighty battleaxe into the arm of the goblin, slicing through its armor and sending it flying off. He brought down a second strike, vertical, killing it. The goblin assault seemed to slow after this blow, though the ones already above ground had no intention of letting up.
They charged the group as the trio worked in unison to slay as many goblins as they could, burning and freezing anything that got too close as Ralathor sent fireballs into the group decimating over forty eight goblins with each blast and stuck out with lightning bolts that fried one hundred goblins each.
The goblin hoard routed. The hootsman chased down the survivors and swung his battleaxe cutting down great swathes of goblins.
Harry looked at his friends and said, "I've never seen goblins that look like that."
Hermione said, "I know goblins can be vicious warriors, but these ones seemed almost rabid."
Ralathor walked over and said, "Aye, these are ancient goblins. Very different from the ones known to the wizarding world. They live in dwarven caves, and all follow their sword lord, which the Hootsman here managed to kill. Not to mention they seem to be twisted by the radiation of the nuclear bomb."
The Hootsman grabbed his battleaxe and saxophone and got back on his motorbike, which was completely unharmed. He said, "No more stalling, bros! It's time to, like, totally ride the waves and wipe that nuclear dragon off the face of the earth, man!"
The other motorbikes were also unharmed and the heroes all got on. It was only another hour slaying goblins at super speed on the path to San Francisco. They tore down the ruined streets and then drove over the waters of the bay to reach the mighty citadel of Alcatraz.
Harry looked at the Hootsman and asked, "Well, now that we're here, how do we find the dragon?"
The Hootsman let a devious smile across his face, "Dude, that's, like, the simplest part ever!" he shouted and then even louder, "Yo, check it out, you lame-o nuclear dragon! My axe is, like, totally booked for a face-to-face meeting with your mug! You won't be spreading your bad vibes in this wasteland any more, man! I'm the Hootsman, and it's time for you to, like, catch a wave to oblivion!"
A grand and horrifying roar emanates from the sky. Harry, in pure desperation shouts his summoning charm out for his broom in the hopes that it arrives, and flying in at the speed of light, his trusty seeker's broom appears next to him with a sonic boom. He mounts it and soars out of sight as the irradiated Hungarian Horntail rises into the sky. Cracks of irradiated green flow behind the scales turned an onyx black. Its eyes radiate nuclear power and when it opens its mouth to roar, green flames erupt.
Rom looks surprised and looks at the Hootsman, "That was your plan! Just yell at it!"
The Hootsman smile still remained, "Well, you know, that and, like, giving it a solid whack in the kisser with my axe, bro!"
Ron facepalmed and said, "Well, at least Harry can get it close enough then."
Harry swoops down on his broom blasting the dragon in the eyes with a lightning spell and zooms away. The dragon moves unnaturally fast as it follows after him. They circle Alcatraz island many times before diverting into the city. Dodging between buildings, the Dragon keeps up with Harry and blasts many toxic flames of radiation at him. Harry spins out of the way of these assaults. He then pulls up, turning completely the other direction and flies back to Alcatraz. He takes the low route, riding the water with his feet barely centimeters from the icy doom.
At last he pulls up as he flies past his friends with the dragon following close by. Ron, Hermione, and Ralathor had prepared a trap for the dragon, which was waiting to be triggered when the time was right. The dragon was flying too fast, and was flying too high for a ground assault, but they didn't need that, once Harry crossed over them they sprung into action, all three casting spells of propulsion on the Hootsman sending him flying high into the sky. The dragon was no longer the strongest thing in the sky as the Hootsman took his axe in both hands and with the cosmic power of a thousand suns brought it down into the dragon splitting in half. The Hollywood Hootsman was now the king of the skies. His legend will never die.
Ralathor looked at the bloodied Hootsman and asked, "Now that that's done, can we get on with why we came here?"
The Hootsman wiped the blood from his face and said, "Totally, dude! Let's, like, ride the stoke back to the Hootsforce, man!"
The heroes got back on their motorbikes and made the 5 hour journey back to Hollywood where the Hootsforce remained where it was left, under a pile of snow that had fallen. The heroes board the submarine. It took to the skies where the Hootsman held out his hand as a cosmic power surged forwards into the time drive, the Hootsforce took off into the skies, into space increasing speed until it hit the speed of light before bursting into a blast of cosmic light as the time drive kicked into overdrive and sent them back one thousand years…