Chapter 4 - The Bad Batch

Author's Note: Yes, this is heart-breaking. :')

~ Amina Gila

Alema Syndulla

Heart pounding, I jump from the gunner's mount instantly, sprinting towards the exit. "Lower the ramp!" I yell to Tech.

"Take us down!" Hunter calls, already at the exit.

I jump down the moment the ramp lowers, rolling when I land, the Force gathered around me, and making a dash towards the wreckage.

Another very well-aimed blaster shot nearly takes off my head. If I wasn't a Jedi, I'd never have dodged on time.

I don't stop running, though, terror gnawing at me the whole way. The fire could spread momentarily, and if the fuel tank is ruptured, that'll be the end of them both. We have to get Hera and Omega out before what's left of the ship explodes.

I pause only when I see someone else approaching, practically silhouetted against the darkness and fire. He's in black, and that's... I don't know but seeing him sends a shiver down my spine. He's too tall and big to be human, but I'm pretty sure he is, and there's something about him that's just... dead. Empty. His mind feels vacant.

I skid to a stop, eyes narrowed and calculating, only to have to dodge another blaster shot.

I realize it almost too late – I have no cover, and neither does Hunter who just joined me, and whoever is shooting at us is pointedly cutting us off from reaching the shuttle. Which leaves me with only one choice. Not that it matters anymore, because whoever the tall figure is, he's heading for the shuttle himself, and I have to get there before he does.

"No, wait!" Hunter calls, but it's too late – I raise my hand, throwing the figure back with the Force. Hard. I skid to a stop, reaching down, yanking my lightsaber from my boot and igniting it to deflect the shots.

"I'll cover you!" I tell him over the blaster fire. I can actually see a bunch of the clones now, slowly closing in on us.

Hunter nods sharply, sprinting past me towards the shuttle. It's not far off now, not with me covering. He's just reemerging when the firing stops.

I don't lower my lightsaber though. I know better than to let my guard down.

And finally, from the shadows, I see someone else emerging, holding a rifle. My anger flares instantly. That's the one who shot down the shuttle, isn't it?

"Crosshair," Hunter greets him, voice level, but I can feel the crushing, strangling pain and emptiness and guilt. It feels like he's drowning in an ocean wave of nearly hopeless grief.

"You're surrounded," he replies shortly. Across from him, I see the other approaching again, and Omega gasps quietly. She draws her bow – I've seen those on Zygerria, and I'd like to know how she got it – aiming it loosely towards the many people surrounding us. Hera and Chopper are here, too, practically hiding behind me. Not like they have anywhere else to go.

"No, we're not," I snark back before Crosshair can keep talking. I can feel how Omega is at the edge of her control, so close to shattering entirely, and if any of us break down, it'll be bad. Best if I step in and end this now – none of them have an emotional attachment to me. "Unless you can fly."

"Hiding a Jedi now?" he continues, blaster aimed anyway, "Bad call, Hunter."

"Crosshair, wake up," Hunter says, stepping forwards, but he makes no move to lower his blaster. "You're being controlled by an inhibitor chip."

Omega, of course, takes that moment to dart forwards, relaxing the tightness of her grip on her weapon, though she doesn't let it go. "He's telling the truth," she adds, "The Kaminoans put chips in all the clones. Remember what I told you in the brig? You can't help it."

I can feel a strange sense of blurred over anger from Crosshair – everything in him is dark, blurred over, wrong. "Aim for the kid," he snaps, and all the blasters aimed at us instantly shift towards Omega.

I jolt forwards, and Hunter pulls Omega behind him instantly. "Your issue's with me, not her," he protests. And he's angry, too, now, even if he knows this isn't Crosshair's fault. I'm angry, as well, and I, of all people, should know better than that.

I'm a Jedi. I shouldn't let my anger blind me so much, but it does and is. It's Hera. It's always about Hera now – I have nothing else to focus on, but at least I know Echo and Fives will be safe. I can only shift positions and look up at the Marauder hovering overhead. It just came back for a pickup – it's being pursued by Imperial ships, and we need to get moving. We somehow need to get up there, but there's no way around. We're just out of range. Crosshair is right about that anyway.

Actually, I could jump with Hera to the ramp. But that would mean leaving Hunter and Omega to die. That would be wrong. On second thought... "Chop," I whisper without turning my head, "Get in the air. Omega, with him."

"What are we doing?" Hera whispers back.

"Do it," I hiss. There's no time to explain.

Hunter inclines his head ever so slightly, and that's the moment everyone springs into motion.

Omega climbs onto Chopper, still keeping her bow out, and I lean down, scooping up Hera and jumping for the ramp. Below me, Hunter ducks and sprints for the destroyed shuttle – it's really the only cover he has down there, but he's the oldest, and the only one who has a chance of surviving.

I jump back down, lightsaber in hand.

Wrecker – that must be him, because I don't know who else it could be – is shooting wildly at Hunter. Good thing his aim's way off, at least.

From above, Omega fires a few times before disappearing inside as the Marauder circles around again. Getting Hunter back inside will be an issue, though. I don't let myself think about it, instead charging our attackers.

I don't think. I just move.

Behind me, Wrecker gets the end of his blaster stuck full of a vibroblade. I've never felt such fury from someone, but with how blurred and deranged Wrecker's mind is, I shouldn't be surprised. And that's the moment I realize exactly how big he is, because of how easily, almost without even trying, he wraps his hand around Hunter's neck and lifts him off his feet, crushing.

I'm about to lash out at him with the Force, just to something, anything, but I don't have time before a blaster shot tears through my shoulder. I stumble, yelping, nearly falling to my knees, but I push myself up, jaw clenched. That burning, searing pain at least is something I'm used to. That's the one good thing that came from Krell.

Everything right now is playing out in slow motion.

Behind me, Crosshair aims his blaster again.

I stumble upright unsteadily, swaying a bit, but hands clenched firmly over my lightsaber hilt.

Wrecker throws Hunter to the ground and reaches to pick up the fallen vibroblade.

"Wrecker, snap out of it," Hunter rasps, gasping for air.

I'll never be able to get there on time, so instead, I do the only other thing I can. I reach out with the Force, freezing the blade mid-air, mere inches from impaling Hunter. I sense Crosshair's blaster aimed at me. I can feel it, and I can't help sparing a glance at him. His hands are shaking. He's a sniper. His hands shouldn't shake. Unless he's fighting it that hard, and I don't think about it a moment longer, because Wrecker is probably about to throw Hunter's blade right through my head, so I reach out with my other hand – what's the saying about killing two birds with one stone? – and rip Crosshair's rifle out of his hands, throwing it at Wrecker.

I have absolutely no sympathy when they both go sprawling.

I take off anyway, running to Hunter, pulling him back to his feet. My arm is throbbing, but I don't have time to worry about it.

Predictably, that's the moment when what's left of the shuttle decides to go supernova.

The explosion shakes the ground, throwing us over again, except it momentarily distracts everyone else.

The Marauder – finally – takes the moment to swoop by again, and we both scramble on while Omega and someone in the guns – it must be Hera – provide cover fire. The ramp closes, and we take off the moment we're all aboard.

"Where are the others?" I ask Tech, sprinting into the cockpit.

"They have an alternate means of transport," he replies as we make a straight dash for space. Finally.

The moment everything is calm, I all but collapse to the floor, panting. We're on the way to the rendezvous, and I... just need time to breathe.

Hera's gasp is what makes me look up, and she runs over to me instantly. "Alema, your –"

"I know, I know," I reply, head tilted back against the wall, "But I'll be fine. It's only the fourth time I've been shot in the past three months. Better than my active war record." Doesn't mean it doesn't hurt, because it certainly does. Blaster shots are burns on injuries, and those are not fun. At least it doesn't bleed much though.

"That's gonna scar," she says finally, biting her lip.

"It's fine," I assure, leaning forwards to pull her into a crushing hug. At least my sister is alright. Except now that I'm here, I don't know what it'll mean for the future. That's what scares me most, because I was seen with Clone Force 99, and the Empire won't just... ignore that. They'll be searching for all of us.

In the cockpit, I see Hunter sitting down in one of the back seats. Omega climbs in next to him and takes his hand. Neither of them speaks. Something about the sheer familiarity of the gesture reminds me so sharply of my family that it brings tears to my eyes.

Hera and I curl up together, and we stay like that for the rest of the trip. I don't remember dozing off, but I must have, because I'm jolting awake suddenly as we touch down. And by the Force, it's relieving to have Echo and Fives back, and I sense Jinx right outside, waiting.

We file down the ramp slowly anyway, no one having enough energy to run. Hera practically runs to our parents anyway though. I approach them slower, awkwardly. I don't fully know how to interact with them. I just... don't know them as well as Hera does. Doesn't mean I don't still love them, though.

"Alema, Hera," Cham greets us, and we move forwards to hug each other. (It's so strange to know that I once had a younger brother, though he's gone now. He's one with the Force. I never even got to see him.)

"I'm glad you're safe," I tell them, hugging them tightly.

Cham moves to talk to Hunter, and I turn to Jinx.

"Are you alright?" he asks me immediately.

"I'll be fine," I assure, "Are you?"

He nods. "They don't know who I am."

I nod, letting out a sigh of relief. "Good. But if I'm with you, I'll endanger you anyway."

"No, you won't," he argues.

"I will," I reply, shaking my head, "You know that. And they need my help. If I wasn't there, they would have died."

"What will you do?" he inquires.

I already know the answer, but I don't know if I can do it. I turn away to face the others. "The Empire knows I'm alive," I say, a bit loudly to get everyone's attention. "They know I was here. They'll keep looking. I think it's best if I leave."

Hera freezes, looking up at me, eyes wide. "Again?"

"I'm sorry, Hera. I don't want to go. But I don't think I have a choice."

"But..."

"You could do so much good for us here on Ryloth," Cham objects, stepping forwards.

"I was made for more, Father. I can see my destiny lies in the stars. I cannot ignore it. It's not who I am. The Order may have fallen, but I'm still a Jedi. There are countless people out there who need me."

"You said you were going to stay," Hera objects, dejectedly. And now that she points it out, maybe it's really just that I'm punishing myself, because I know Ahsoka has no one, and it's not fair that I do. Doesn't mean I have a right to hurt Hera and the rest of them, though. But in the end, with how close the Dark is to me now, I need to be careful. There was a moment I was considering letting everyone else die, just to save her, and she might need my help, but now, I need to entrust the Force with her.

I can't do it myself.

"Hera," I reply softly, kneeling in front of her, laying my hands on her shoulders. I don't know what to tell her. The most I can do is start talking as the words slowly form in my mind. "We're instruments of the Force. You know dejarik, right? It's like that. We're like that. We are one with the Force, and in the end, we're all directed the same way, down the same path. Light will always win. Even if we're on opposite sides of the galaxy, we'll always find a way back to each other."

"Do you know that?" she asks, a look of sorrow burning in her eyes.

No. Yes. Maybe. I trust the Force, anyway. "Family can never leave each other, even if they try. I know where my home is. And I hope, someday, maybe, we'll find it together in the stars."

I could stay. If I leave, I'll be agonizing over them constantly, every moment, but if I stay, I can make a difference. I'll be with people I know how to fight with, and my skills will actually matter. Cham only cares about Ryloth. I don't blame him for that, but Hera and I see farther. We were meant for more.

And I hope, maybe, we'll succeed. Together.

I only wish I wasn't in this position, one where I have to choose my role as a Jedi over my very own little sister.

Hera blinks a few times, pulling herself together and nodding, though the pain in her eyes is still visible. I lean over to kiss her forehead, then pull her into a tight embrace, begging the Force that this not be the last time we're together. I don't think so though. She's been too important to me to lose. And... maybe this way, I'll be able to get the rest of my family back.

**w**

I'm still not sure how I feel about leaving Hera and Jinx behind. All I can do is try not to think about it too much, and at least I'm not just sitting around anymore. I know Jinx will protect Hera, and my parents are perfectly capable of fending for themselves, even if I regret leaving them.

Right now, the most I can do is try settling in, and help this... other broken family pick themselves up.

So, when I sense Hunter alone in the cockpit, brooding, I can't help entering. He feels so dark and empty and lonely. "I know how you feel," I can't help telling him quietly. "I was a Commander once, you know. I left everyone behind. I didn't have much choice."

"We should have gone back for them," he replies, staring blankly out the viewport.

"It wasn't your fault. There was nothing you could've done." I lean against the wall, crossing my arms. It's hard to believe I'm sixteen. I feel twice that age.

"We didn't even try."

"What could you have tried?" I point out, morbidly, "They would have killed you. If you were in their place, wouldn't you have had them leave?"

"It's different," he argues, "They're my squad. I'm supposed to protect them."

"My master was the second most powerful Jedi that's ever lived, and even she couldn't always protect me. We'll find a way to get them back."

And maybe, I can't help thinking, I know a bit about the aftermath of mind control. I know too much about it. Ahsoka was, once, briefly, on Mortis. Anakin hardly had time to free her. Even now, I still dream of it sometimes. She didn't remember it after, and in some ways, that made it worse. The not knowing, the way we could hardly speak of it, made her struggle even more.

"One of my sisters... it's complicated Jedi shenanigans, really, but one of my sisters was mind-controlled once. We saved her, but it took a toll on all of us. There's nothing we can do to change the past, Hunter."

There's a long pause of silence. "We stunned Wrecker," he says at last, "We would have taken him with us, if we hadn't been attacked by a bounty hunter. When we came back, he was gone."

"It's like I said," I reply quietly, "There was nothing you could have done. And even if there was, you didn't. What matters is getting him back."

I almost expect him to ask what if we can't, but he doesn't. And I get it, too, because I don't dare voice that concern. I know why he's afraid of that. I blame myself for... what happened to Anakin and Aniya, too. Every passing moment, I want to run right back there to make sure they're safe. To make sure that...

Something.

To make up for that I left in the first place.

Guilt is an emotion Jedi are taught well how to handle, but clearly, I've never mastered that. And... we all have things to feel guilt for.

That's when, for the first time, I see him absently rubbing his head.

"Are you okay?" I ask quietly, uncertainly.

"It's nothing," Hunter answers tightly. Too tightly. "I get headaches from overstimulation once in a while."

I think he and I both know that's not true. I don't know how I know – it's a strange, instinctive knowledge, I guess. And suddenly, I think I remember seeing Tech do the same thing once. Same place in both of them. I think know why. There's only one answer. And I have to help them.

We can't get access to a proper medical facility easily, but... I do know one. Maybe?

"Bracca," I say, without thinking, "We can go to Bracca. It's a graveyard for Republic ships. There has to be something there we can use."

He looks briefly surprised, but hides it fast, and nods.

**w**

"Thank you," Fives tells me, the moment we have a chance alone, "I would have done something long ago, but we didn't know where to go."

"I know," I assure him, "I didn't realize it was a problem with them, too."

Echo and Fives glance at each other, then look away. "Hunter had us promise to leave with Omega if something happened to him," Echo relates quietly.

Fives' hands clench. "But we've lost enough of our brothers lately."

My heart aches for them. "It was the least I could do."

I wish I could do more.

I can't.

Instead, I just watch.

Hunter is first. Tech runs the scan on him, and Echo runs it on Tech. We have to keep an eye out for scrappers, but in the end, I think this is best. Omega is glued to their sides the entire time.

Echo and Fives are close, but there's something about the bond Hunter and Tech share that's different. Maybe it wasn't always, but it is now. They grew up together, and in the end, they've only ever always had each other. It reminds me of Ahsoka so sharply it hurts. Of everyone, I thought she was the one person I would never be away from.

I feel a slight tingling of danger in the Force, but we make it off-planet before anything can happen.

The second we're clear of the danger, Omega moves to hug them both. Tech, especially, never struck me as the hugging type, but somehow, he and Hunter end up hugging anyway, and Omega squeezes in between them.

Why is everything with them giving me flashbacks to my own family?

Exhaustion is nagging at me now, but that's normal. I'm too exhausted to stay awake, but I can't sleep either. I haven't been able to sleep alone since... Krell. Something about the fact that he was right across from me jarred something in me, and I can't be... alone since. I always need to have someone beside me – usually Ahsoka, someone who I know without a doubt will protect me.

Ahsoka, Aniya, Anakin, Appo – and later, Jinx or Hera – she did the job fine, too, which is weird – but none of the people I know now I'm that close with. I end up sleeping near Fives and Echo who are always together or outside Omega's room most of the time. Back when it was happening, I thought something was wrong with me, but Aniya had assured me that she struggled at first – she and Anakin always used to be together on Tatooine, apparently, and being apart was very hard.

I guess it doesn't really matter what it means about me, because I'm not a Jedi anymore. I can't stand for what the Council was becoming – even if I wish they were still here.

Exhaustion nips at me again, and I settle down outside of Omega's room again. Being here, it feels more like what I'm used to. I didn't have the heart to tell Hera, but I can't deny it once I'm here. Bonds forged by war and hardship are thicker than blood. Stronger than anything.

Now? I can only wish it'll be enough to get my own family back.

I open an eye at the quiet sound of shuffling. Omega. "Don't step on me," I whisper, scooting over a bit.

She freezes. "I didn't mean to wake you."

"It's okay. I wasn't sleeping yet."

"You don't seem to sleep much."

"Yeah, I can't. I'm not used to being alone."

Omega sits down next to me, clutching a tooka doll in one arm. It's... admittedly nice to at least have her here, even if I don't know her.

"I've never met a Jedi before," she comments, leaning forwards.

"I was a padawan," I tell her, "Aniya Skywalker's. I think you've heard of her."

Omega nods. "A little. What was the war like? I mean... if you're alright with talking about it."

It'll hurt, but I'm already thinking about it, and talking about it now might... help. Maybe. "It was... stressful," I settle on finally, "But exciting, sometimes. Mostly, I... think of the time when my family was together. But people died. All the time. It was hard to be in charge of that." I look down, twisting my hands together in my lap. "A lot... happened to us, but back then, it was always so much easier. We often looked forwards to when it was over, but I guess it's really just beginning."

I tilt my head back, shifting so I'm leaning against the wall. "I miss it though. So much. It sounds crazy to say, but... that was the happiest part of my life."

Omega's grip on the tooka doll tightens a bit, and she looks away.

"What's her name?" I inquire quietly.

"Lula. Wrecker named her Lula."

"That... was Wrecker's?" That's weird. I can't imagine him having a toy, but hey, I'm biased. I don't know him, and I very much dislike beings way bigger than me. I can't help it, after Krell.

Omega nods.

"I didn't know clones were allowed to have things on Kamino," I remark at last, "None of the ones I knew did. We don't have much at the Temple, either."

"My brothers were always different," she answers, voice shaky. My heart clenches sharply. She's crying. I didn't mean to make her cry – it's not like Jedi are taught how to deal with depressed younglings. She's younger than me when I first became Commander, but not much.

"We'll get them back," I promise her, "Somehow. I'll help you." I just wish that could be enough to get my own family back together, to fill the vacant emptiness burning deep within my heart. I just want to go home. I wish I had a family to go back to, but I don't. Not really. What's left of them are scattered on the far ends of the galaxy. And some things, like this, are too deep to even cry over.

Final Notes: If you want to join our Discord to receive updates or just hang out, here's the invite link, and please delete the spaces! :) discord . gg / nqSxuz2

You can find us on tumblr at fanfictasia (which is our more serious blog which does have controversial posts on it; I won't be offended if you choose to block it, promise), and disastertriowriting (which is our fun blog with crack posts or incorrect SW quotes; we also advertise our SW gift exchanges on there)

And! We have a YT channel for tributes! Please delete the spaces in the link. :D youtube channel / UC_g1M5rSCxJUzQCRS29B6pA

Finally, if you're interested, you can submit a SW gift fic request via the following form (delete the spaces): forms . gle / rmXWtRomMMaULuPa6

NEW: We've just opened a SW Anakin-clones fic request form as well. :) (delete the spaces): forms . gle / SC5gBdwhXpTNJidr7