Going Above and Beyond
"Why can't he just ignore her?" Hermione thought to herself, "I know she's loathsome, but he's not helping anyone by rising to her bait."
The focus of her thoughts was, as was so often the case, Harry Potter. Of all the terrible things that had happened in the last few months, the placement of Dolores Umbridge at Hogwarts was far from the worst, but it was probably the most irritating. The wretched woman had been forced on the school by her veritable ostrich of a boss to spy on Professor Dumbledore, crack down on anyone who dared to suggest that Voldemort had returned to life, and make Harry's life miserable. In that last one, she had been most successful.
Being named a liar for recounting the most traumatic thing that had ever happened to you would be bad enough, but Umbridge was also doing all that she could to bait Harry into getting himself into trouble so that she could torture him in her detentions, and he just kept falling for it.
Hermione sighed and went back to reviewing her Charms assignment. Her studies were the one thing that made being at Hogwarts bearable this year, that and the D.A., but that was a study group, so it counted. Her paper on the six primary rules of spell modification had barely taken her any time at all, and she had already finished editing it, but it never hurt to read it over again.
"I'm telling you, Parv, he was so hot!" came the light and airy voice of Lavender Brown.
Hermione rolled her eyes and quickly closed the bed curtains before her roommates made it inside their shared room. She didn't dislike Lavender per se, but she didn't need the distraction the bubbly blonde could easily be.
"He had these gorgeous blue eyes and was so bloody fit. He was wearing these short pants muggles wear to the beach, and let me tell you, it left nothing to the imagination," she continued.
A wave of giggles followed that.
"So he's the one you've been so hung up on?" Parvati asked.
"Well, it's not like I'm in love with him or anything, but fuck, I swear he bloody ruined me," Lavender sighed. "The blokes here just don't measure up, if you know what I mean."
"He was that big?" Parvati asked.
"Like a bloody horse!" Lavender giggled. "I swear, Parvati, I've never felt so full or anything that deep. Cormac was good and all, and he's definitely bigger than most, but it wasn't the same, and I just miss that feeling."
Hermione blushed at her oversharing dormmate. Lavender had lost her virginity to her date to the Yule Ball last year; Hermione didn't even remember who he was, but it didn't matter much since she moved on quickly from him. As she shared everything with Parvati and the two didn't mind gossiping in front of her or Fay Dunbar, Hermione had overheard her fair share of stories like this over the last several months.
"Maybe Dean would be more your type," Parvati suggested. "He's got pretty big hands, and you know what they say about guys with big hands."
"According to Mandy Brocklehurst, he's pretty average," Lavender replied. "I just wish there was a way to know how big a guy is at a glance, you know."
"Maybe there's a spell for it?" Parvati laughed.
"There should be," Lavender grumbled. "There's a spell for bloody everything."
"Well, it's not the kind of thing you'd find in the library here," Parvati said.
"Can you imagine the look on Pince's face if we asked?" Lavender choked through her laughter.
Hermione silenced her bed curtains, ensuring that no further sound would reach her. Her face felt hot, and she was sure it was beet red, but her mind raced with ideas she didn't want to contemplate. That spell idea Parvati threw out would be fascinating if the subject matter wasn't so perverse. There was a neat little charm used mostly by parents of young children to figure out the exact height of someone you cast it on. That charm could theoretically be modified to measure anything, and Hermione was sure that such variations were common, but for Parvati's idea, it would be measuring something with varying dimensions.
"The arithmantic calculations required for it alone would be..." Hermione murmured to herself before stopping abruptly.
"No, no," she thought to herself, "I'm not taking on something so gross and perverted...even if it would be an interesting and complicated challenge."
She groaned and started putting away her papers and books. She clearly needed a good night's sleep. She was sure she would stop finding the prospect of a penis-measuring charm so compelling once she was well-rested.
"The very idea," she muttered as she ended her Lumos charm.
Harry hissed as Hermione applied the essence of murlap to his hand. The vibrant red wounds, spelling "I must not tell lies," made her sick to her stomach. A professor at their school was torturing a student in a manner clearly visible to anyone who looked without the slightest fear that she wouldn't get away with it.
"Is it helping at least?" she asked softly as she finished up.
"Yeah," Harry replied, his voice tired and strained, "thank you, Hermione."
"I shouldn't have to be helping you with this," Hermione raged. "Surely if you told Professor Dumbledore..."
"Dumbledore won't even look at me this year!" Harry exclaimed, "Anyone else I tried to get to help would just get fired. There's nothing we can do."
"He will show himself eventually, and both Fudge and Umbridge will be ruined then," Hermione whispered. "The whole country will want their heads when they learn the truth; we have to believe that."
"They already should!" Harry snapped, and at Hermione's hurt look, he added, "I'm sorry for snapping at you. I don't know what I'd do without you."
"It's okay, Harry," she replied. "I know how hard this is on you."
Harry turned to stare at the fireplace, and the two of them just sat in silence. Neither one of them had ever felt uncomfortable in quiet moments or needed to fill the void with small talk. Hermione wished she could do more for her closest friend in all the world, but she was at a loss for what to do. As she sat there pondering what more she could do for Harry, she suddenly remembered why she had sought him out in the first place.
"Harry, could I borrow your cloak tonight?" she asked quietly. "There's a book I need to get a better look at, and it's not one I'd like to be caught with."
"Restricted section, I take it?" he asked, his tired voice taking on a subtle wry note.
"You know me," she replied quickly. He did know her, just as she knew him well enough to know that he would accept that blatant lie without question. She didn't like lying to Harry, but there was no way in hell that she would ever tell him what she would really be doing.
"Sure," he said, "just return it to me in the morning, okay?"
"Of course," she promised, "thank you, Harry."
"Any time," he whispered, "just let me go get it."
Hermione let out a breath she didn't realize she'd been holding as Harry left. She hadn't really thought that he would turn her down, but she was worried that he would ask questions. Her book lie was sufficiently in character that it should have worked, but the idea of fessing up to the type of project she had been working on to Harry or anyone else, for that matter, was too mortifying to consider.
The spell modification idea Parvati had unwittingly given her had not gone away after that night's sleep as she had hoped. It had continued to gnaw at her mind until she found herself examining exactly how the height-measuring charm worked and how it might be altered. It was a truly simple charm at the end of the day, and modifying it to measure one part of the body instead of the entire thing was equally simple. The challenge had come, as Hermione had known it would, from figuring out how to get the charm to measure the penis in both the flaccid and fully erect states.
It had taken her the better part of two weeks, and while she still couldn't look at her notes without blushing, she was sure she had figured it out. The only problem was that she had no means of testing it. She could cast it on a bunch of boys and judge from how much sense the numbers made, how likely it was that it worked as designed, but without having any way to verify the numbers, she'd never know for sure.
"Still, I know how big...they are, or what the generally understood range is," Hermione thought to herself, "so, as long as the numbers are all slightly different and fall within that range, I can probably assume that it works. If it does, then hopefully I'll be able to use my experience here on spell modification projects that can actually be shown to professors."
"Hermione," Harry's voice broke her out of her thoughts, "here."
"Thanks again, Harry," she said, taking the bundle of shimmering fabric from him.
"Thank you," he replied, "the sting of it's already going away."
"I'll bring this by in the morning," she said. "Night, Harry."
"Night, Mione," he replied.
Once he had disappeared up the stairs, Hermione took the cloak and left the common room. There were a few people around, and she hardly wanted anyone to see her disappear. Coming across an empty classroom, she made sure that no one was looking and slipped inside. Once she was entirely alone and there was no risk of her being noticed, she slipped the cloak around herself.
As a young girl, Hermione often felt invisible at school. Her passion for reading and learning, her disinterest in things kids her age had actually enjoyed, and the abrasive personality that she'd had back then left her without friends. At the time, feeling invisible had hurt and confused her, but truly being invisible was incredibly different.
She had only ever borrowed the cloak once before and had noticed just how freeing it was to walk through the halls of Hogwarts completely obscured. She knew that anyone could detect her if they performed a life detection spell, and Harry would know where she went if he happened to look at the Marauder's Map, but by and large, she was unnoticeable. After casting a couple quick silencing charms on her shoes and the cloak to make it even more unlikely that she wouldn't be noticed, she made her way to the library.
Harry would have no reason not to trust her; he had let her borrow the cloak after all, and Hermione knew that he wouldn't specifically check to make sure she had told him the truth, but on the off chance he looked at the map, she decided that actually going to the library was a good idea. She could test her new spell anywhere there were boys, after all.
She knew that she should feel bad about violating the boys' privacy like she was, but it wasn't like her data would ever be seen by anyone else. She didn't care about their size and would be doing her best to forget everything she learned while testing out the spell. What mattered was if her spell modification worked, or so she kept telling herself.
Reaching the library, she sighed quietly. There were many things about Hogwarts that she would miss when she graduated, but few as much as the library. That bastion of magical knowledge, unparalleled in Europe, as far as she knew. As luck would have it, one of the few targets she had specifically chosen was there.
"Dean," she murmured. "Perfect."
Lavender had described the tall boy as average, or so Mandy Brocklehurst apparently told her. Pointing her wand at her unsuspecting classmate, she intoned, "metiretur virilis."
Suddenly, in her mind's eye, two sets of numbers appeared, reading 3 1/4 and 6 1/8.
"Slightly above average," Hermione thought to herself, "but close enough to match what Mandy Brocklehurst told Lavender. Just under twice as long erect as it is flaccid, and while that apparently differs a lot from boy to boy, it's perfectly believable.
All in all, it was a promising test. First off, the spell had given her numbers, which she hadn't been sure it would, and beyond that, they were believable numbers. That they also seemed to correlate with what she had heard was also promising since she couldn't exactly verify any of this.
"Now I just need to test it on others and make sure I don't get the same results from each," she thought to herself.
She spotted Neville in the corner, reading some thick tome and looking worried as he took notes. She had no idea what assignment he was working on, but if the look on his face was any indicator, she would guess potions. Casting the spell again, she saw new numbers.
2 7/8 - 6 1/2
"Yes," she hissed to herself, keeping quiet out of habit despite the silencing charm around her.
Neville was apparently bigger than Dean and had a great difference between his flaccid and erect states, but what mattered to Hermione was that she got different numbers.
"Still believable, though given that Neville's shorter than Dean, surprising," she thought to herself, "but they're different. It's not just giving me random numbers for no good reason."
Spells could behave in unusual and even inexplicable ways before they were perfected. The height-measuring charm was quite simple and had no real effect on the people it was cast on, so once she made sure that spell could be cast without having a physical effect, she was able to cast it on people without fear, but there was still a chance that it would malfunction in ways she hadn't even accounted for. Getting two different sets of numbers from two different people was a good sign.
She looked around to find someone else to test the spell on. She could use anyone, she supposed, but the brunette witch had used two boys in her year so far and wanted to find someone older just to be absolutely certain that it would make no difference. After a moment, she spotted Eddie Carmichael sitting in a corner, engrossed in a book. She cast the spell again and saw the results flash before her mind's eye.
3 1/2 – 5 1/2
"It seems to work perfectly," she thought to herself, "at least as far as I can tell."
"Watch it!" she heard a male voice exclaim just as loudly as you could get away with without drawing Madam Pince's ire.
She turned and saw a tall boy who had clearly just had a near run-in with a little first-year and was barreling towards her. She panicked and jumped out of the way of the speeding figure.
"Inconsiderate jerk!" she growled.
She knew he couldn't see her, but there was no reason to walk that quickly through a crowded library, especially after he had nearly knocked someone over already. She decided that the jerk could be her next test subject and raised her wand at him.
"Metiretur virilis," she said firmly.
3 3/8 – 7
"Hmm," she thought to herself, "the largest so far and the first one not to show a fraction. Who is this guy anyway?"
She wandered over to the shelf he was searching through and snuck around him to get a better look.
"Cormac McLaggan?" she thought to herself. "This is the guy who wasn't big enough for Lavender?"
She felt her face redden at the thought. Seven inches sounded uncomfortable to her, and Lavender had been left wanting. She shook her head and made her way to a spot near the far wall that was relatively empty. McLaggan's result fit with what she had heard Lavender and Parvati talk about, and that was as much proof as she was likely going to get that her spell worked. She had heard those two talk about different boys last year, but they could have grown in the last few months, so she couldn't really trust what she had heard.
"I'll just test a couple more for completeness sake and call it a day," she murmured to herself.
She looked around the library, trying to pick someone she recognized as being at least in her year, when she spotted the smug face of Draco Malfoy. Sitting in the far corner with Nott, Crabbe, and Goyle, the four of them were working on something. The shining badge of the Inquisitorial Squad was prominent on his chest. She didn't even hesitate to cast the spell on the obnoxious pureblood, and then she had to bite back a laugh at the results.
2 1/4 – 4 1/4
She genuinely believed that size didn't matter and that Lavender's obsession with it was ludicrous, but she would be lying if she said she wasn't amused by the fact that Malfoy was the smallest one she had found today.
"Oh well," she murmured to herself, "I think that's enough."
Anything more would be excessive. She didn't set out to catalogue the penis size of every boy in Hogwarts. She just wanted to test her spell, and she had. Hopefully soon she would be able to put what she had learned about spell modification from this experiment to more legitimate use and forget everything else.
Well, except perhaps for what she had learned about Malfoy.
She made her way back to the Gryffindor common room, her mind abuzz at what other spells she could try to modify. If she could come up with something really novel, it would guarantee an O on her Charms OWL. She gave the Fat Lady the password and swerved around Ginny as she made her way to the stairs. She had often thought it rather sexist that girls could go up the stairs to the boy's dorm when they were locked out of the girl's, but she appreciated the opportunity to give Harry back the cloak quickly.
As she entered the dorm room, she saw it was empty and went to take off the cloak when she heard a voice call out from one of the bathrooms, "fuck!"
"Harry?!" she called out, recognizing his voice instantly.
The bathroom door opened, and out stumbled Harry, rubbing his forehead. He was wearing his glasses and nothing else, having clearly finished a late shower just before she got there. Hermione froze, belatedly remembering that she still had a silencing charm on the cloak. Harry clearly thought the room was empty when he heard no one respond to his exclamation. Hermione had seen Harry hurt many times over the years and would normally have focused on the injury at hand, but the bump on Harry's head was not what drew her attention.
"Bloody hell," Harry grumbled to himself, though Hermione barely heard him.
She had thought about penises more in the last week than she ever had, for obvious reasons, but even if that wasn't the case, she still would have been helpless to stop herself from looking at what hung between her friend's legs. He wasn't hard, not even a little, but he was so bloody big. Her body worked on autopilot, drawing her wand and pointing it at him. She uttered the incantation, still in a daze at the sight before her.
4 7/8 – 9
"Nine?!" she thought to herself.
She had to get out of there. Harry started getting dressed, clearly fine after hitting his head. He had had worse, and she was in no state to help him. She raced down the stairs and up their counterparts to her own dorm room. She didn't remember to remove the cloak until after she had already drawn the curtains closed around her bed.
"Nine inches," she murmured to herself, still disbelieving what she had seen, "how would he even...ow!"
Harry was a dear friend whom she had never thought of in that way, and in that moment, she was glad about that. She couldn't imagine taking something that large inside of her.
"My cervix would resign in protest," she groaned. "Poor Ginny's even smaller than me. My advice that she should date other boys might be to her benefit in more ways than one. The only one I can think of who might be able to handle him is Lavender..."
She paused, her head snapping forward as an idea formed. Lavender, she was perfect. Okay, she was kind of airy and rather flighty at times, but the bubbly blonde might be the ideal solution to her Harry problem. When she started pondering weeks ago how she might be able to help Harry learn to stop letting Umbridge's venom get to him, sicking her nymphomaniac dorm-mate on him hadn't even occurred to her. Why would it? Lavender had never shown much interest in Harry and was experienced, to put it politely, while Harry had never kissed a girl, as far as she knew. But Lavender was also obsessed with large penises, and by Merlin, Harry had one.
"They might not work out long-term or anything," she murmured to herself, "but her attentions might put him in a good enough mood to endure that wretched toad in silence. There are no magical sexual ailments, and she clearly takes precautions against pregnancy."
The question of how she was going to set them up left her stumped, however. She couldn't exactly tell Lavender about Harry's uniqueness. Even if she believed her, she had no idea how Harry would react if he ever found out that she had meddled in his life. She still remembered how he had reacted when she told Professor McGonagall about the firebolt in their third year and had no interest in repeating that experience. She would have to be more indirect. Her eye was drawn to her trunk, where her notes on the very spell she had just been testing lay, and she let out a sigh.
She had been adamant about no one ever finding out about that spell, but then how many times had she changed her mind about something she was adamant about because of Harry? Lavender would love it, she knew that very well. The girl's birthday was coming up too, so Hermione could even frame it as a gift. She might be a gossip, but she could surely be sworn to secrecy on the origins of something that she would appreciate this much.
"It could work," she thought to herself. "Lavender would likely test it out on the Gryffindors first, discover that Harry has everything she seems to be looking for in a boy, and pounce. The spell is a blatant violation of privacy, and I'll be making some of the less fortunate boys deeply unhappy if Lavender shares the spell, which she almost certainly will; the fact that Malfoy is one of them is irrelevant, but is it worth it if Harry's torment is lessened?"
She already knew the answer to that; she had set a man's robes on fire for Harry once. There were few things she was unwilling to do to help him. Retrieving some new parchment, she took out her dictiquill as well. A dictiquill was essential to anyone who wanted to take notes on a potion while they were brewing it, and unlike a certain insect's quick-quotes-quill, it took down exactly what was dictated to it. The other benefit was that the writing style was different from her own. She believed that Lavender could be trusted to tell no one about her involvement in the spell, but that didn't mean she was going to leave any indisputable proof that it was hers. She could even make the parchment look older if she really wanted it to look less like her work.
A couple days later, she finally got Lavender alone. Fay was always an early riser, even on the weekends, and had already left, as had Parvati, whom Hermione knew was meeting with her sister that morning. Typically, even on a Saturday, Hermione would have been up and out long before Lavender showered, but she had held back after bathing, staying behind her bed curtains until she was sure that they were alone. Once she heard the sound of the water stop, she called out
"Lavender, could I talk to you for a minute?"
"Sure, Hermione," Lavender called back, "just a second."
A moment later, she emerged, wrapping a cream-coloured towel around her hair. It matched the one currently wrapped around her body.
"What's up?" she asked.
"I was thinking a couple weeks ago about how grateful I was for your help with my hair and makeup last year for the Yule Ball," she began.
"Oh, it was no big," Lavender replied. "I love doing makeup, and you looked brilliant."
"I did," Hermione replied with a smile, "but I was overhearing you and Parvati talking about...boys a couple weeks ago and..."
"Ooh," Lavender crooned, "do you have your eye on someone? I can totally do your look for the date. Who is he?"
"Uh, no, no one," Hermoine stammered. "I mean, I heard you two talking about your preferences in boys and how you wished there was a magical way to tell."
"Not really seeing what you're getting at," Lavender said.
"Merlin," Hermione groaned, "look, Lavender, your birthday is coming up, and I remembered how grateful I was for your help last year, so when Parvati mentioned a measuring spell for boys, I created one."
Lavender's jaw dropped, and she just stared at Hermione for a solid few seconds.
"You're kidding," she said.
"No, no, I'm not," Hermione replied, her face turning red.
It turned out that talking about this was more embarrassing than thinking about it. She really should have seen that coming. Her embarrassment was not helped when Lavender started laughing.
"I really don't think it's that funny," she said with a scowl.
"Hermione," Lavender managed to get out as her laughter stopped, "you of all people worked on a cock measuring spell. I appreciate it, and if it works, I'll do your makeup for life, but it is absolutely funny."
Hermione groaned and sat down on her bed. "I suppose it is a little ridiculous. I'm almost certain that it works, though."
"Test it, did you?" Lavender asked wryly before dissolving into giggles, "Oh, Merlin, you did!"
"I wouldn't give someone an untested spell!" Hermione exclaimed in her defense.
"Oh, Hermione," Lavender said, sitting next to her and hugging her, "I'm sorry. This really is one of the sweetest things anyone's ever done for me."
"You're very welcome," Hermione said. "As I said, I am almost certain that it works because, while I tested it, I have no idea if the results are accurate."
"Did you do Terry Boot?" she asked.
"No," Hermione replied.
"Dean?" she asked.
"Yeah, it said he's around six inches," Hermione replied, blushing again.
"Sounds about right," Lavender replied.
"McLaggan registered around seven," Hermione added.
Lavender's eyes lit up at that, and she squealed, hugging Hermione again.
"It does work!" she exclaimed.
"Lavender," Hermione said as she extracted herself from the huggy blonde, "I do have one condition for this gift."
"Name it," she replied.
"No one can ever find out that I made this," she said. "As far as anyone will ever know, you found it tucked into the back of a library book you took out for a charms essay. Okay?"
"Why charms?" she asked.
"It was a charm I modified for it," Hermione replied simply.
"Okay," Lavender said, "look, Hermione, I can tell from the spectacular shade of red you turned that this is embarrassing for you, which makes the gift all the sweeter. I swear, while I will share this with at least Parvati, I won't tell anyone it was from you."
"Okay," Hermione said as she pulled the folded parchment from her pocket, "here you are."
Lavender looked at the yellow, tattered looking parchment and cocked an eyebrow as she took it.
"You really didn't want this to look like you made it, huh?" she asked in amusement. "Did you use a dictiquill?"
"Yes," Hermione admitted.
"Oh, this looks easy," Lavender said as she read through it.
"It's based on the height-measuring charm," Hermione commented.
"Ah, makes sense, I guess," she said. "Thanks, Hermione, really."
"I'm glad you like it," Hermione said, "I've got to run, though, so I'll see you later."
"Later," Lavender replied, still looking at the spell.
After her conversation with Lavender, Hermione put the spell and her bubbly dormmate out of her mind. She had done what she could to try and help Harry relax without looking like she was interfering in his life, and she figured that there was nothing else to be done on that front. A couple days later, she found herself doing something far more familiar than creating perverted spells or trying to subtly set one of her friends up with a girl: helping Ron with an essay.
"This doesn't make any bloody sense," Ron grumbled.
"Vanishing spells are a good deal more complicated than what we've dealt with before," Hermione conceded, "but this is our OWLs year; it's to be expected. I know you can get this if you..."
"Um Hermione?" a voice from behind her interrupted her.
She turned to look at her distraction and was surprised to see an unusually serious-looking Lavender.
"Lavender?" she inquired.
"Sorry to interrupt, but could I talk to you for a minute?" Lavender asked "in private."
"Um, sure," she replied, confused about how her dormmate was acting. "Ron, read over this chapter again and see if it makes more sense the second time. I'll be back in a moment."
She followed Lavender to an empty corridor.
"Is something wrong?" Hermione asked.
"No," Lavender replied quickly, "or at least I hope not. I just wanted to know, you and Harry, is there anything between you two?"
"Oh," Hermione thought to herself. She hadn't seen that coming.
"No," she replied, fighting to keep the grin off her face, "we're just friends. He's a really great guy, but I've just never seen him that way."
"He is great, isn't he?" Lavender asked, "kinda tall, gorgeous eyes, and he's been great with the...you know."
Hermione was glad the blonde had the wherewithal not to mention the D.A. even where they appeared to be alone.
"Anyway," Lavender continued, "I just wanted to make sure. You've been a good friend, and I didn't want to make a move if you had feelings for him."
"Thanks, Lavender," she replied warmly. "Oh, there is one thing, though. Far be it for me of all people to give you advice about boys, but well, despite having been friends with one for four years now, he's rather obtuse where girls are concerned. If you want him, I'd suggest taking the initiative and being direct. Coyness and subtlety will likely be lost on him."
Lavender thought to herself for a moment before replying, "I guess you know him best. Thanks for the advice. It might be fun to be direct for a change, anyway. I'll see you later."
Hermione replied in kind and returned to Ron. She felt good about everything she'd done for Harry. She knew that she had gone above and beyond in being a good friend to him, and at this point, she just had to hope it helped.
"All right," Harry said as he brought the D.A. meeting to an end. "I think we made some really good progress today. We'll meet up at the same time on Thursday."
He had to admit, as he watched everyone file out, that he was enjoying himself. As much as Hermione had needed to talk him into running the D.A., it was honestly one of the few bright points in an otherwise miserable year. He didn't think he'd enjoy teaching as much as he did, but there was something about watching someone pick up a new spell or get better at something they were struggling with because of his help that he definitely liked. He stretched his neck from side to side and groaned as he felt it snag when he tried stretching to the right.
"You okay?" Hermione asked, one of the last few in the room.
"I'm fine," he replied automatically before adding, "I just tossed and turned a lot last night, and my neck's stiff."
"I can help," came a bubbly voice from behind him.
He turned and saw Lavender Brown standing there. She had taken off her outer robe during the meeting and revealed that she was wearing a blue tank top and a black skirt so short that she'd have been called out for it if a professor had noticed. The cut of the tank was low, revealing a tantalizing view of her substantial cleavage. Her spellwork had clearly been strenuous too, and Harry had to will himself to look away from the sheen of sweat on her full breasts.
"I give great massages," she added.
"That's okay, Lavender," he said, "thanks though."
"Nonsense," Hermione piped up, "if Lavender wants to help you, it would only be polite to let her."
A comfortable-looking chair appeared next to him, and Harry was reminded that Hermione had been the one to set up the Room of Requirement this time. She pulled him over, and he sat down heavily.
"It's okay to let people do things for you," she whispered to him, "especially people who might be feeling grateful for what you've done for them."
"Thanks, Mione," Lavender said, winking at his closest female friend.
"I'll see you both later," she said, leaving him and Lavender alone.
"Mione?" he asked.
"Better than Herms," Lavender giggled, walking behind the chair.
He felt his heart flutter at that melodious sound.
"I just didn't know you two were close," he said, moving to get up.
He felt two hands grab his shoulders and pull him back.
"We don't hang out every day or anything," Lavender said as she started to rub his shoulders, "but we've slept in the same room for years, we get on pretty well. You are so tense."
"Yeah, it's been one of those...lifetimes, really," Harry replied. He supposed that he might as well just let Lavender do what she wanted He couldn't say it didn't feel good.
"You should take this off," she said. "I could give you rugburn through your jumper."
"I guess," he said, quickly pulling it over his head.
He heard her cast a couple spells, and suddenly there was a film of warm oil across his neck and shoulders. She really started to dig in then, and he couldn't help but groan.
"You're good at that," he said quietly.
My dad gets these headaches from time to time 'cause the muscles in his neck bunch up or something. I've watched my mum do this more times than I could count.
"You're this good from just watching your mum?" he asked.
"I might not be the best student here," Lavender replied, "but you'd be surprised how quickly I can pick things up when I like the subject."
"Yeah, you picked up the Patronus Charm really well," he commented.
"You think so?" Lavender asked.
"I know you haven't managed a corporeal one yet, but your mist is stronger than most," Harry replied. "The trick is to find a truly happy memory."
"I can always try making new ones too," Lavender said. "Maybe you could help me."
He was about to ask what Lavender meant when she started gently kneading under the base of his skull with her thumbs and he moaned out loud.
"Sorry," he said quickly, "that just feels really good."
"Don't apologize," she giggled. "You don't have to force yourself to keep quiet if something feels good. I never have."
Her breathy voice made his cock twitch in his pants, and he shifted uncomfortably. He knew Lavender was hot; his vision wasn't that bad, but he had never gone out of his way to get close to her. Hermione apparently had, something she had never mentioned to him or Ron for some reason, but he had never given her much thought outside of noticing how developed she was. Just being this close to her now was turning him on, something not helped by how it almost seemed like she was flirting with him. Just as he was about to shift again to try and hide his growing erection, she dug her nails into his hair, and he went completely still.
"Fuck," he groaned.
"Like this, do you?" she giggled. "I love your hair, by the way."
"Huh?" he managed to get out as the sensation of having his scalp scratched sent shivers down his spine.
"Yeah," she continued, "it's messy, but in a good way, and it would probably relax if you grew it out. It's not like Hermione's hair."
She continued the absolute magic she was doing to his head, and he just closed his eyes and let himself melt into his chair.
"You're practically petrified," she laughed. "It's almost like you've never had someone scratch your scalp before."
"Never," he replied honestly.
"Wait, what?" she asked.
"Never," he repeated.
She went quiet then, simply continuing what she was doing. In the silence of the room, he actually heard her lips part, but if she meant to say something, she clearly changed her mind. He wouldn't normally have opened up even that much about his home life, especially to someone he didn't know all that well, but in that moment, he was more relaxed than he could ever remember being. After a while, she stopped
"Move your head from side to side again," she said.
He did so, and he was pleased to feel that he could stretch fully in both directions without it snagging. He twisted his head in both directions and grinned. Lavender had made all the tension in his neck melt away.
"That's perfect," he said. "Thank you, Lavender."
"I'm happy to help," Lavender said softly.
"Seriously, I don't know how to repay you," Harry continued as he stood up, "this was driving me nuts all day."
"I thought you said it was nothing," Lavender teased.
He chuckled. "I guess I say that a lot."
Lavender stepped closer, her blue eyes boring into his. "You don't let people take care of you much, do you?"
"It's always felt weird," Harry admitted.
"Well," Lavender said, stepping so close he could smell her flowery perfume, "if you want to pay me back, I do have one thing in mind."
He nearly stepped back, but she had him right against the chair he'd just been sitting in.
"What...what is it?" he asked.
"Kiss me," she said.
Harry didn't even have time to be surprised before her lips were on his. He stood still as a statue, his brain freezing on him. That first kiss was chaste, just her warm, plump lips on his, but she followed it up by sticking her tongue in his mouth. Her probing tongue played with his own, and Harry's brain turned back on. He recognized the teasing challenge in her kiss and started moving his tongue against hers. He had no idea what he was doing, but decided to just copy her and hope for the best. He felt like he was on fire, in the best way possible, and when she moaned softly into his mouth, the sound shot straight to his cock.
Lavender broke off the kiss and pushed him back into the chair. Her eyes were full of mischief, and something he didn't recognize, but liked instantly.
"Fuck, you're hot," she said.
"Uh, shouldn't that be my line?" he asked as he caught his breath.
She laughed at that. "Thanks, Harry, but seriously, how did I never notice? You're really cute and your eyes are gorgeous, but this..." she paused to rake her nails gently along his muscled arms. "I never noticed how muscly you are."
He wasn't bulky by any stretch of the imagination, but Quidditch and preparing for the tournament last year had left him with a solid, if wiry physique.
"But most of all, it's how you've taken charge in the D.A.," Lavender said. "You seem to hate being the centre of attention, which I get given everything, but you've really taken to leading this little group of yours. Its sexy."
"Sexy?" he asked, still unable to believe this was real.
She responded by climbing into his lap and straddling his hardening cock.
"Very," she whispered.
Lavender kissed him again, and he decided to just try and copy what she was doing again. He could feel the unbelievable warmth emanating from between her legs, and between that and the pressure, he was afraid that he was going to cum in his pants at this rate. The Room had reverted to his control after Hermione left, as he had followed her in right after. Responding to his fear and his desire to alleviate some of the pressure on his cock without having to stop kissing Lavender, the chair he was in was transformed into something he could lie back in. He didn't realize at first that it was a bed.
"My my, how forward!" Lavender giggled.
"I'm sorry, I..." he tried to reply.
"Don't apologize," she said. "I like forward."
He expected her to kiss him again, but she simply ground herself on his cock again.
"You know," she said with a wide grin, "this feels very promising."
Before he could even respond, she had her wand back in her hand, and his pants and boxers came flying off.
"Merlin," she breathed, transfixed on his cock, "it's perfect."
Harry moaned and clenched his eyes shut as he felt someone other than him touch his cock for the first time. He opened them again and saw the blonde holding it against her forearm.
"Fucking huge," she murmured, her eyes wide in amazement, "and so thick too, it's like my bloody wrist."
"Really?" he asked.
"Harry, this is the biggest cock I've ever seen," she enthused. "Aside from Hagrid and Firenze, its probably the biggest cock in the castle."
She wrapped her other hand around him, and he was surprised to see they didn't cover the entire thing. He had never given much thought to the size of his cock. He had always had more dangerous things to think about.
"You are going to split me in two," she shuddered.
"If you think it's too much, we don't have to..." he said, his brain screaming at him to stop. Thankfully, Lavender cut him off for him.
"Oh, it's not too much," she said confidently. "You are going to feel so fucking good inside me, but first, I should take the edge off."
Before he could ask what she meant, she leaned in and licked his cock from base to tip.
"Oh fuck Lavender," he groaned.
"Trust me, Babe, that's the idea," she cooed, "but, your first time and all, I'm gonna need to make sure you don't pop off right away."
She swirled her devilish little tongue around the head of his cock, and he felt his legs shake. He had been as hard as he had ever been in his life since they started making out, and he already felt like he could cum at any second. She moaned and started kissing his cock like it was the most precious thing in her life. The grip she had on the base of him was gentle and teasing, and it felt so much better than his hand ever had. Finally, she took half of him in her mouth, bobbing up and down in time with her jerking hand.
Harry gripped the sheets as his whole world became bliss. Everything about the girl worshiping his cock was intoxicating to him. From the sucking and slurping sounds she was making, to the blue eyes filled with what he was starting to recognize as desire boring into his own, to the smell of her perfume, she had bewitched him completely. Nothing compared to the feeling of being inside her perfect mouth, though. He was powerless to hold himself back or even warn her as he started to cum.
With a strangled cry, he burst inside her, spurt after spurt rushing into the beautiful temptress' eager mouth. He had never cum that hard in his life, never felt anything so utterly wonderful and when it finally ended, all he could do was collapse back. He panted, trying desperately to catch his breath, and closed his eyes. If he had lasted ten seconds, he would be surprised. He cringed at his own ineptitude and cursed himself in his mind. He had no idea why Lavender was suddenly interested in him, but he knew he wanted to keep her interested.
"How the hell is a girl like Lavender going to stay around if I can't even last a bloody minute?" he thought to himself.
"Don't tell me I broke you," he heard her giggle.
He opened his eyes, and his jaw dropped at the sight before him. Wearing nothing but a confident, sultry smile, Lavender stood there, hands on her wide hips. He had noticed her dark blue dress at the Yule Ball the year before and how well she had filled it out, but that image of her had nothing on the one in front of him now. She had to have the biggest breasts in their year. The large, full, and perky mounds rested high on her chest, capped by large pink nipples. Her flat and surprisingly toned belly then led to her perfectly smooth and glistening pussy. She was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.
"Don't beat yourself up about cumming so quickly," she said as if she could read his mind. "Like I said, it's your first time, and all boys are quick the first time. I blew you so you'd last longer when you're actually inside me."
"You're incredible," he groaned.
She giggled and climbed into the bed next to him. He couldn't keep his eyes off her incredible tits, and the way they moved as she walked was enough to make his cock twitch.
"Sorry, I didn't, you know, warn you," he said.
"I don't mind," she replied. "I've always thought swallowing is just part of it. Any other girl, though, yeah, give them a little heads up."
It was just then that he noticed a little of his cum had escaped her lips and dribbled down towards her chin. He reached over and swiped it up with his thumb, intending to wipe it off on the sheets. When she noticed what he was doing, she grabbed his hand and brought the cum-covered thumb to her lips. She made a show of sucking on his thumb, bobbing her head up and down like it was a little cock, and he felt his own start to come to life again.
"Mmm, yummy," she whispered.
"You really think so?" he asked.
"I've never minded the taste of cum," she said. "Some of it can be pretty awful, but yours isn't."
After a minute, she added, "do you want to taste me?"
He looked down at the clearly wet lips of her pussy and replied immediately, "sure."
Just as he was about to move in closer, she said, "stop, wait."
She slipped a finger inside her slit and brought the digit to her mouth, licking her own juices off.
"Yeah, it's okay," she said. "Go ahead."
"Do that again," he said.
She laughed. "What, you want to watch me finger myself?" She slipped her finger back inside and thrust it in and out a couple times. "I'd rather have something much bigger in here, you know."
He didn't respond; he just took her hand in his, pulling her finger out of her pussy and bringing it to his lips. Eyes trained on hers, he wrapped his lips around the finger and sucked the pussy juices off it. She tasted mild, he decided, slightly salty and tangy but far from unpleasant. Her eyes widened, and she shuddered slightly.
"Fuck Harry," she moaned.
"That's the idea," he echoed her words back to her with a smirk, "but first I definitely want more of a taste of you."
He buried his face between her thighs before she could say another word and gave one long lick up the entire slit. Her breath hitched, and he figured she had enjoyed that. Her pussy was fleshy, with full lips spread out like a flower in bloom. He started licking and kissing around it, trying to find something that would get a reaction from her. After a moment, he focused on the hole she had fingered and slipped his tongue inside her.
"Higher," she said.
He followed the simple request, abandoning the hole to lick higher and higher until he neared the top of his slit.
"There's a little nub at the top there," she said. "It's my clit. I'll let you know when you find it."
He found a little nub like she described almost as soon as she said it and was pleased by the gasp he got from her the second he licked it.
"That's it," she said, her nails digging gently into his scalp. "Lick there."
He swirled his tongue around her clit like she had done to the head of his cock and experimented licking from different angles to see if anything made her particularly loud. Her thighs closed around his head.
"Keep going," she moaned.
He thought about how her compliments about his cock had made him harder and said, "I love how you taste."
"Really?" she asked.
"Mmm hmm" he replied quickly. He was growing to like the taste, especially with the reactions he got from her while he ate her out..
"Well, you can...mmm...you can eat me out whenever you like," she whimpered. "You're even better than a vibrating charm, baby."
He dug his hands into her thighs and continued licking her. He had heard of vibrators before but he had no idea there was a magical equivalent.
"Wait," he thought to himself "when I speak parseltongue my tongue vibrates. I wonder if that would work."
He focused on the image of a snake in his mind, hoping that it would work as well as a real image, and tried speaking into her clit.
"Cum," he hissed.
The effect was immediate. Lavender's thighs clenched almost painfully around his head, and her back arched off the bed. Her mouth hung open in a silent scream that she gave voice to a moment later.
"FUCK!" she shrieked, her whole body convulsing.
Her thrashing moved her clit away from his mouth, but he continued speaking parseltongue and licking his vibrating tongue up and down through her whole pussy. She squirted all over his face, and he purposefully ignored it so he could keep going. It went on for far longer than his ever did, and she continued writhing and screaming through it all. Words seemed to escape her as her orgasm continued on and on. Finally, after what had to be nearly a minute, she managed to get one out.
"STOP!"
Harry jerked back like he'd been struck and took in the vision of the girl he'd been eating out. Her face and chest were flushed, and her hair looked like she'd just gotten out of bed in the morning, but what he noticed most was that she had clearly been crying, and her mascara was running down her cheeks.
"Lavender, are you okay?" he asked.
"So good," she wheezed, rolling onto her side. "So good. Gonna fucking worship you later."
His now painfully hard cock twitched at that, and he sat down next to her as she caught her breath. He ran his fingers lazily through her hair.
"What did you do to me?" she asked when she could.
"Parseltongue," he replied. "You mentioned a vibrating charm, and I figured a vibrating tongue would be really good."
"Really good doesn't even begin to describe it," she laughed. "I've never cum that hard in my life."
"Well, I guess we're even then," Harry chuckled.
She glared at him, but her lips twitched upward. "Harry, I didn't blow you even close to how well I can and will later, but first..." she trailed off to grab his cock and said, "I want this inside me."
She wiped her eyes and paused. "I look like a fucking raccoon don't I?" she asked.
"In your defense, you're a sexy raccoon," he replied.
"Smart arse," she murmured, her lips twitching upward.
She grabbed her wand and cleaned the black streaks and smudges off her face.
"Much better," she sighed happily, "now lay back."
He did without a word and was treated to the sight of Lavender Brown crawling towards him, her perfect tits swinging under her, and her arse swaying as she moved.
"A magic tongue and a cock as big as my forearm," she said. "I might just have to keep you."
"I might just let you," he replied earnestly.
Lavender faltered for a moment at his words, but she shook her head and crawled up to him. Taking his cock in hand, she hovered just behind it for a minute, holding it up to her.
"It reaches my bellybutton," she whimpered. "You're going to fucking destroy me."
In that moment, he was willing to do whatever she wanted. He let out a hiss when she started rubbing her pussy along his length, lubing him up for her. She obviously wasn't interested in teasing him anymore, though, as she quickly grabbed his cock and lined it up with her dripping wet hole.
"Now let's see how much of this monster I can get inside me. It's gonna be such a tight fit," she cooed.
She was so soaking wet that with just a little downward pressure, the head of his cock popped right inside.
"Oh fuck," they groaned in unison.
He had thought that being inside her mouth was the best thing imaginable, but it had nothing on the hot, slick, crushing vice that was her pussy. Lavender held still for a minute, just experiencing the initial stretch, before she started swallowing more of him between her lower lips. She kept saying "ohh" and "wow" as she continued her descent, bobbing her pelvis up and down. Her beautiful cunt was a pleasurable furnace wrapped tight around him, and Harry was amazed that he didn't cum on the spot. His earlier orgasm had given him some stamina, and he was determined to hold out.
When he saw her shaking slightly, he asked, "are you okay?
She just kissed him in response and continued taking more and more of him. She was panting from the exertion as she wiggled and wiggled her way down. If the look on her face was any indication, she was enjoying the stretch as much as he was enjoying the feeling of being inside her. He was glad she was so wet though. He doubted even his head would have fit otherwise. He felt himself hit bottom within her just an inch or so before their pelvises met. Her thighs trembled against his hips as she squirmed on top of him. He felt the muscles of her pussy squeezing and relaxing as if she was hoping to suck the last of him in.
"Guess that's...that's as deep as I can...can take it, holy fuck," she panted.
As she had been taking more and more of him inside her, her long blonde hair had fallen forward and was tickling his neck. She tossed her hair back with a jerk of her head and grinned down at him.
"So how do you like it?" she asked.
How could he even reply to that? Being inside a girl was indescribable. The hot, tight, wetness smothering his cock was the most incredible thing he'd ever known.
"You feel incredible," he said. What else could he say?
"So do you, baby," she cooed, "that fucking burn is so good."
"Burn?" he asked. "Does it hurt?"
"You're so big," she moaned, "you're really stretching me. It burns a bit, but it's a good burn."
She started slowly grinding on him, moving her hips in little circles that felt wonderful. "You're so fucking tight," he groaned. "If you don't go slow, I don't know if I'll last."
"Don't worry," she said. "I'm on the potion, and I'm sure I can get you hard again. Try to hold on, but don't worry too much."
She continued her slow and gentle grinding, letting out little whimpers and moans as she went. It felt like she was milking him with her vice-tight pussy and he started thinking about anything that could distract him from the incredible feeling. Her tits started bouncing as she went, a mesmerizing sight. He grabbed them and brought a nipple to his mouth.
"Fuck yes," she moaned, "suck my tits, baby."
He went back and forth between the two, kissing and licking at random as he tried to find what she liked most. She had made him cum already, but he could still only hold out for a few minutes. He tried desperately to stop it, thinking of his professors and even his aunt and uncle, but she was just too much.
"Oh, fuck Lavender!" he cried out.
She felt too good, and he just didn't know how to stop himself. He came deep inside her, amazed that it was somehow even better than when he had cum in her mouth. If she was disappointed, she hid it well, looking down at him with lust and excitement. She laid down as he finished and slipped out of her, cuddling into him as he came down from the high.
"Sorry," he panted.
"Don't be," she said, grazing her nails over his arm. "You already made me cum harder than I thought possible, and your cock felt fucking wonderful. You'll have plenty of time to learn how to last longer."
"What do you mean?" he asked.
"I don't want this to be a one-time thing," she whispered. "Do you?"
He just stared at her. She wanted to keep seeing him. For the first time in years, Harry felt genuinely lucky.
"Does this mean you want to be my girlfriend?" he asked, "because that would paint a massive target on your back right now."
She thought about it for a moment and replied, "If you're worried about that, maybe we could just be fuck-buddies for now."
The thought of fucking her over and over again through the year filled his head, and he felt his cock harden again.
"Already?" she asked, her eyes wide and filled with wonder.
"Seems he likes the idea," he said, flipping her on her back. "He's not the only one."
"Definitely not the only one," she breathed. "How many times do you think you can manage tonight, baby?"
"I have no idea," he said as she grabbed his cock and helped line him up, "but I don't intend to stop until I can't move."
"Fuck me," she moaned.
He kissed her and pushed inside. He meant what he said. He'd happily fuck her as many times as his cock would let him. At the very least, he was going to make her cum on his cock or die trying.
Hermione hummed to herself as she brushed her hair for the night. Her essay on animate-to-inanimate transfiguration was proceeding well. She would likely end up only a foot over the required length this time. She hoped Professor McGonagall wouldn't mind. The Scottish woman had complained in the past about how far over the limit she had gone, but she had really tried to stay under it this time.
She heard a sigh come from the doorway to her dorm room, and as she looked over, she was startled at the sight. Disheveled was the most polite word Hermione could use to describe Lavender as she limped into the room. Her hair showed signs that the other girl had attempted to fix it, and she had clearly taken all of her makeup off while washing her face, but it was still plain as day that she had been through some ordeal. She looked utterly exhausted, but she was also grinning from ear to ear. Hermione hadn't seen Lavender or Harry since she left them in the room.
"Surely they didn't spend the entire time..." she thought to herself. Her thoughts were interrupted by the sudden hug she was enveloped in. At least Lavender didn't smell like what she had clearly been up to.
"Thank you," Lavender whispered in her ear. She limped to bed after letting Hermione go, climbed in without even changing out of her clothes, and fell asleep the second her head hit the pillow.
"Clearly her and Harry had a good time," Parvati chuckled.
A thought occurred to her that she couldn't help but give voice to: "I'm surprised you don't mind, after the Yule Ball."
"Oh, I'm over it," Parvati sighed. "I'm definitely going to get an apology from him if he's going to date my best friend, but it was one bad date. Besides, given why Lavender became interested in him and how happy she clearly is, we wouldn't have worked."
Hermione tried to keep the blush off her face and avoid letting her dormmate know that she knew what she was talking about. Harry dating Lavender wasn't something that she would have imagined a month ago, but maybe she'd be good for him. At the very least, if he was half as happy as Lavender looked, he should hopefully have an easier time ignoring Umbridge. Hermione put her friend's sudden love life out of her mind and climbed into bed. Whatever came of this, at least she tried to help him.