Chapter Four – For a better word
Ana
We're seated on a balcony overlooking the packed dance floor. The music is blaring; strobe lights are flickering and the people below sway to every beat as the music commands. Promptly the server returns with our drinks, and Kate and I toast to another Saturday night out. I motion her to lean forward.
"What's going on?" I say over the music.
She gives me a perplexed look and leans her head to the right.
"Usually, we would line up to get in this place and that would take an hour. Tonight, we just walked up to the front and now we're in VIP. So, what's going on?"
"Elliot" she simply states.
I give her a big grin, thumbs up and I continue to sip my virgin Pina Colada. Smiling with the straw between my lips, I sway and bob my head to the music. Everyone in the crowd is having a good time, especially in a particular section of the people. In the corner of my eye, I notice someone looming over Kate, it's no surprise when I spot Elliot kissing her like she's the only woman in the world, but what startles me is his brother poised next to him like a cobra ready to strike. I'm not in the mood to do this tonight, I'm here to have a good time. I turn my attention back to the animated partygoers. Kate taps me on my shoulder and signals that she and her beau are departing. Not wanting to be a complainer I put on a brave face and waved her and Elliot off. The server from before comes bouncing to our table solely focused on Christian. She takes his order and doesn't notice my empty glass on the table or offer to refill my drink. Our bubbly server returns not long after with another virgin Pina Colada for me but two glasses of what I believe is straight Scotch for him. Without looking at me, he throws his head back and swallows a glass in one shot. Astonished, I cast my wide eyes back downstairs; it seems that he has a thing for alcohol, I saw him drinking the same way last night at the dinner party.
"I didn't know?" I start.
He turns his head to me, his eyes indifferent.
"I'm sorry about this afternoon, your allergy, I didn't know."
"Of course, you didn't know, it's not your fault" his reply is jaded.
His attention goes back to his phone and my eyes trail over to the dance floor where Kate and Elliot are tearing it up. Almost half an hour has gone and he's diligently attending to his phone and finger-tapping the screen.
"So, we're going to do this all night?" I ask still looking below.
He leans forward, "Sorry I didn't get that".
"I said are we going to be this way all night? You're pretending I'm not even here".
"I am?" he places his phone on the tabletop and gazes at me empty. "I apologize"
I stare back with the same amount of vehemence, "You're creepy you know that".
"Creepy! Well, that's a first, I can believe arrogant, heartless, domineering, even a dick, but creepy. C'mon, you could do better than that"
"I don't hate you, Christian" I defend immediately.
"I never said you did," he waves a finger at me, "and hate is a very strong word. It shouldn't be used liberally".
He picks up the other glass of Scotch and the contents vanish in one gulp; he signals the server for what I guess is another round.
"You up for some small talk," he tests still wearing that impassive façade.
"Sure, why not" I shrug my shoulders and then lean forward.
"Where are you from?"
"San Diego, Kate and I moved here when we graduated from High School. She wanted to further herself in ballet, so she continued that. She just came back from New York where she did an intensive dance course. . . ."
"No, no, no, now you're just rambling, I never asked about Kate, we're talking about you . . . What? Your life isn't interesting enough," he says a bit rude and lethargic.
I purse my lips then narrow my eyes, "I studied at the Art Institute for a few years and now I work part-time at the Sheraton as an Apprenticeship Chef."
"Okay," he mumbles, "That wasn't hard".
"What about you? What do you do?" I probe.
"I'm part of a global conglomerate that provides a variety of products and services, including retail, automotive, information technology, energy, and industrial equipment. It's composed of seventy-two companies dotted across every continent".
I'm genuinely fascinated but it doesn't register on my features. Ms Bubbly Waitress returns with his drinks and sets them down in front of him while ogling at his face. His eyes don't look her way as his gaze is trained on me, she walks away tolerant.
"Wow that's a mouthful, it's sound rehearsed and I bet you've said that hundreds of times. You must be a busy man, yet you have the time to sit here and tell me all of this," I say smart-mouthed, "What part do you play in this global conglomerate."
He exhales dispirited, "I'm the President and Group CEO for North America".
"You don't sound too enthusiastic about that" I point out.
He picks up one of the glasses and takes another swig, this time he clears his throat and scrunches his face.
"Tell me something else about you" he diverts.
I realized that I've put my finger on a sensitive topic, so I'll avoid it, for now. I have nothing else to contribute to this conversation as I declared that my life began when we moved to Seattle almost five years ago. Very, very faint, I hear my name from downstairs, Kate is waving like an overjoyed cheerleader, and she signals me to come join her. I look back at Christian who also notices Kate.
"Go on, meet your friend" he looks a bit bombed; only his eyes follow me when I stand.
Elliot crisscrosses me on the way to the dancefloor; it's a good thing he's going back to his tipsy brother maybe he can get him to slow down on the drinking.
I don't know how much time has passed but we both found ourselves swallowed up by the frenzied crowd of partyers and having a magnificent time. When we get back upstairs Elliot and Christian are talking but they stop when we get to the table. Elliot greets us with a smile whilst Christian is staring straight ahead with glassy eyes. Kate and I turn to each other and then look at Elliot in wonderment.
"Is he alright?" Kate asks concerned.
"He's fine, I should get him home," he states.
"We'll go with you," she adds.
I'm tempted to roll my eyes; I'm not ready to go home. In fact, I was just getting started. Elliot slings his brother's arm around his shoulder and assists him slowly downstairs. We've just exited the club and Kate has her arm around me, indeed she recognizes that I'm disappointed and pouting.
"Well, it was good while lasted" she tries to cheer me up, "Don't worry we'll do this again soon, just you and me".
"No, I wouldn't want that. Elliot is cool but Christian needs to lighten up. . ."
Suddenly, two men appear in front of us making us stop in our tracks and blocking Elliot and Christian from our view. Instantly I recognised both of them, they were just some random guys dancing in the club. They're invading our personal space and appear to be intoxicated so we take a cautionary step back.
"Where are you going?" one of them says with a forced smile flicking his eyes between us. The other one is eyeing Kate from head to toe.
She puts her hands up defensively, "We're leaving," she says curtly, and we try to manoeuvre around them.
"No, wait, wait, wait" the second man insists and takes her by the wrist. Her face grimaces from the force of his iron grip, she's trying to yank her hand away.
"Hey, you don't have to touch her" I confront the man trying to get between him and Kate.
Without warning, Elliot appears twisting the man around and striking him square in the jaw. His friend takes off leaving him to face Elliot's explicit fury by himself. While the men are scuffling on the pavement, I turn to Christian who is leaning against a car and going down, slowly. Not wanting him to fall to the ground, I dash over to him, prop myself against him and put his arm around me for support. He looks down at me half-lid with a stupid smile on his face.
"You smell nice," he moans. I stare back at him cold; he's the reason why we're out here in the first place.
Two bouncers from the club pull the wrestling duo away from each other, but in the end, the man is carried away after Elliot is recognized and he explains what happened. I hear Christian moan for the fourth time and again I pay him no mind. Elliot has his hand around Kate in a comforting embrace as they make their way towards us.
Then comes, the highlight of my night. His eyes are closed and his head leaning against my chest. I'm frozen, not by the chilly air but by a familiar sound coming from Christian, and a warm substance trickling down the insides of my dress.
. . . . . .
By the time I was done again, my skin was crimson. It didn't take long for me to get under the shower after I burst through the front door. This was my second shower and somehow, I can't forget that alcohol-laced stench, maybe it's my imagination . . . It doesn't matter I want it to stop. I walk into my room wrapped in a towel and the other on my head, padding across the floor on the balls of my feet, careful not to wake him. When I'm done acquiring a few articles of clothing, I note he's sitting upright when I turn around. There's a startled befuddled look on his face.
"What are you doing in my room?" his voice is gravelly.
"Your room?" I say mockingly, "No, you're in my room, go to sleep-"
"What?"
"Christian," I exhale, praying for patience, "You're in my room, go back to sleep."
His head snaps to the left and right, and his face is beginning to look disoriented. It takes a while for recognition to take centre stage.
"What am I doing here?" he questions.
"You don't remember anything that happened last night?" he takes a moment to recall whatever he can.
"We were at the club with Elliot and Kate . . . and we were talking . . . and I don't remember anything else."
"That's it?" I stress unnecessarily. His gaze is vacant and lost. I mentally smirk and dip my eyes to the floor.
"Tell me what happened" he persists, making me look up at him. "Tell me"
"Okay," I stall, "Well we . . . . you know" I murmur.
"No, I don't know".
"We left the club then we came back here" his eyes roam over my damp towel and then the vacant spot next to him on the bed.
"To do what exactly," he says annoyed. "What did you do to me? We haven't drafted the contract yet, and you're scheming to take advantage of me".
"Excuse me? Take advantage of you, well this is laughable. Don't think so highly of yourself, I'm good enough to get someone. I don't think drunk and incoherent are qualities I'm seriously after".
"How about rich . . ."
"UGH" I bellow out, "You're so annoying, I'm not interested in your damn money. You must have serious self-esteem issues when you think that's all a woman wants from you, or maybe you already know that you have nothing of substance going for you".
"I have nothing, I'm not the one parading around in a towel".
"I'm in my room you jackass".
He scoffs, then looks down at his chest and lifts the covers, "What the hell am I wearing?"
He's cladded in a pink T-shirt that's mine but too big for me and his boxers. I stare at him poker-faced with my arms crossed.
"Where are my clothes?" he demands.
"Outside" I direct him to the door.
Swiftly he leaps out of bed and makes a dash into the living room. Kate and Elliot shriek when they see him bolt into the room. Remembering that he's clad in his boxers he apologizes to Kate.
"What's the matter? Are you still drunk?" Elliot asks.
"I wish I was. Why did you allow that woman to put me in her bed?"
Elliot looks at him half-lid, "The words are thank you, Christian"
"And who should I be thanking exactly".
"Ana, you were in a drunken state, vomited all over her, and she stayed out here while you slept in her bed. You're something else, you know that?"
As if he knows that I'm looking at him with disdain, he turns around quietly as I'm standing in the doorway of my bedroom. He opens his mouth, but I lift my palm to his, silencing whatever he's about to say. The apartment is dead quiet when I take a step back and slam the door shut.
Christian
This is becoming an embarrassing habit, misjudging Anastasia. It takes a while for me to pull myself together and walk up to the door.
"Anastasia, I call out," knocking lightly on the door, "I apologize for the things I said".
No response is forthcoming. Slightly embarrassed, I look back to the disapproving glowers of Kate and Elliot, I knock again, still feeling their gazes on my back.
"Anastasia let's talk. You're right, I am a jackass, and I've judged you wrongfully".
The door opens in a massive swoosh, "What else?" she inquires, "What else are you apologizing for?"
She's wearing shorts and a tank top, her hair wrapped in a towel. Her cheeks are flushed, and her eyes are alight, the sight of her face makes me take an awkward step back. My words are caught in my throat as I stare at her face, I find myself unable to tear my eyes away from her.
Suddenly, I noticed Elliot standing close by with his hands submerged in his pocket, and it broke me out of the spell. I clear my throat, casting my eyes on the floor.
"I apologize for last night, Anastasia, I don't know what happened but . ."
"What happened was you were in a senseless, drunken stupor. You couldn't find yourself and you were completely defenceless,"
Her voice is calm and nonjudgmental, but I'm ashamed of my actions. We were all at risk because of it, and things could have been worse.
She continues, "Did you know your brother got himself into a fight trying to defend his fiancée? And you, his brother, were leaning on a car drooling on yourself".
"I'm sorry to have disappointed you, but . . ."
"Disappointed, is not the word, Christian, you ruined my night, you ruined it for everyone. You threw up in my dress, and then you have the audacity to assume that I attempted to seduce you when all I did was treat you like a human being".
I purse my lips, feeling shame and regret wash all over me.
"If anyone should be angry, it should be me, you destroyed my favourite dress." She grimaced.
"I'll get you a new one . . ."
"No, no Christian, you can't fix everything with money and saying you're sorry isn't good enough, so here's how it's going to be," her finger is aiming at my face, "Rule number one, no excessive drinking when you're with me. For a man who personifies authority and power, you let yourself slip through the cracks. You were vulnerable and inconsiderate, and we were all worried about you, especially Elliot".
I'm on the outskirts of an angry storm. There's a speckle of distress in Kate's eyes, Elliot is disappointed, and Anastasia's countenance slowly morphs into annoyance. I have nothing to say for myself because she is right, so I listen.
"Do me a favour?" she churns stepping closer to me, "No, do us all a favour whenever you decide to go on a drinking binge, do it by yourself. I've only known you for one day, and so far, you haven't proven me wrong, but I dare you to, Christian Grey . . . and the next time you want to do something to wreck your life don't take us down with you".
She turned around, stepped into her room, and closed the door. It wasn't loud, but it jolted me, as part of me shattered at that moment.