You wake up drooling supercooled saliva on a pillow. This pillow isn't yours, however, and so you aren't bothered by this discovery for you do not have to clean it up.
Speaking of cleaning up however, you really should go hop into the shower really quick, get rid of some of the bodily fluids (not quite all of which are yours) and get started with your day. Sure, it's, like, 5am, but surely nobody will mind, right?
Right. So you get going, snapping off a quick message to Brian about an idea that came to you in the middle of sleeping (when you have all your best ideas, obviously) and being promptly shut down (would've been too convenient if you could just enslave everyone to your whims the easy way). Note to self, find an alternative way of enslaving everyone to your whims (aka the hard way).
More immediately relevant, you have a corpse rotting around in the middle of the woods, that is, one that's actually potentially valuable. For a moment, you feel like a primal hunter in times when defeating large animals was a battle rather than handling a gun proficiently (though you do do that, too) or maybe some white asshole a couple centuries back that came to Africa just to murder a few endangered animals and keep the ivory for the nice price it brings.
Then again, perhaps being a magical girl is just the natural evolution of those things. Truly, your wisdom runs as deep as your boner does into a virgin pussy.
Which in turn brings you to the next point, toweling off with a stranger's towel and considering your smartphone. Should you really call Melanie at 5 (plus a couple minutes) in the morning?
Yes, yes you should. It takes a few moments (that you pass by rummaging through your storage box to get at your breakfast, delicious bars of chocolate you took with you just in case) before she answers, but that's alright- you shall magnanimously forgive the insolence just because it's Melanie.
"Ughhh... Jackie...?"
"Muh," you confirm your identity. "Wakey-wakey."
"Whasup, is, uh, four in the morning..."
Five in the morning and counting. "Muh, treasure hunt. You in?"
"... Gimme five more minutes..."
Once again, you have scored. For you are Jackie the scorer. The one that scores infinitely.
You pick Melanie up at her window, flying in with an ice platform and knocking against it to let her know you're there. Naturally, your kinda girlfriend takes a little longer once again, but finally you have her climbing out wearing a jacket and outdoors pants over her pyjama.
A good choice of clothing, of course. You approve. Down with those stupid societal conventions demanding you wear clothing appropriate to the time and occasion; henceforth, you too, shall wear you pyjamas at all times whenever you damn well please!
Viva la revolution! Down with the business suits! Just stay at home all day and have fun with your family instead!
"Jackie..." Melanie interrupts your profound inner monologue. "Said something about treasure?"
She glomps onto you, sleepily cuddling into your body. You shall allow this.
"Muh. Loot in the forest. It's an adventure." You don't exactly tell her that you've already killed the monster in question and are just picking up the body, but really wanted someone around because flying to the forest and back with it in tow would be boring otherwise.
Not scary, not at all. You aren't scared by the uncertainty of a dark forest you don't know a monster to be in. That would be ridiculous.
"Okayyhh," Melanie yawns, stretching her limbs and settling down a little while trying to keep herself comfortable- not easy on a ground made of literal cold hard ice. "Can I sleep a little on the way?"
"No." You want her to pay attention to you instead.
Travel to the cave containing the treasure is long and perilous, with stormy winds and dangerous animals impeding your progress.
By which you mean there's a mild wind blowing and a couple of birds fluttering around, but you need to get the mood right for your professional level of narration.
You have a very nice voice, daddy
Melanie, too, is slowly growing more awake, meaning that she can cuddle you more actively. Your body might be somewhat cold, but that doesn't change it demands cuddles. Also, friction is a thing, which is why you go to great lengths to rub Melanie's pert breasts.
Rub rub. Rub rub rub. Ruuub.
"I like you too Jackie, but I don't think this is the time for this," Melanie laughs in exasperated amusement. You couldn't disagree more, however.
"Muh. Always time." There is no possible time you wouldn't molest Melanie's titties when given the choice. With the possible exception of having sex, raping someone or something, exerting your dominance over the world at large by brutally exterminating an enemy and/or getting shiny, shiny coins.
At any rate the cave is still burned into your memory as the only place you ever had to retreat from in disgrace, incidentally forever cementing the fact that hobgoblins are hateful little shits that you must crush under the soles of your boots in history. Therefore, you only get lost a handful of times before reaching it, finally setting down and gesturing toward its entrance. "Muh."
"Huh, that's a lot of destroyed trees," Melanie comments as she takes a quick look at the surrounding area. And indeed, you also notice that some of the vegetation has been torn down for some reason. "Are you sure it's safe?"
"Muh," you nod decisively. "Monster is dead." It better be. Though if your golems could answer, you would be asking them right now why exactly they would set up what looks a lot like an improvised set of log-benches around a splintered stump.
"Oh, I see," your girlfriend says, focusing back on the entrance. "In that case, did you bring me here to explore its lair together?"
"... Muh," you agree. It's more or less correct and you don't feel like answering in more detail.
Walking right in, you turn on your phone's flashlight mode, letting you orient yourself a little better. It doesn't take long inside the mildly claustrophobic, earthy environment to come upon the first large chamber you know to be inside from what fragmentary memories you have of your first visit to this place; there you find the corpse of the monster, in surprisingly good condition too despite the theme of 'rotting while alive' the ugly quadruped monster had going even before you killed it.
Also, a sizeable heap of valuables. How'd those even get here? Did some modern-day cult discover this thing and decide to bring it sacrifices as their new god? If so, how dare they not bring their tribute to you instead.
Melanie gasps, a hand slapping over her mouth. "Look at the size of this thing," she whispers with wide eyes. Obligingly, you direct the light back on it. "It must've been five meters tall easily. Are you sure it's dead?"
"Muh," you confirm at normal volume.
"And all this stuff! It must have killed dozens of people and kept it here for some reason. Can monsters distinguish valuables?"
"Some," you say, hinting at the fact that most monsters should be able to discern coins being important in some way. This doesn't apply to, what, watches, cash, rings and general jewelry like you see here, but you don't really give a fuck. "Want some?"
"... Is that really alright? Shouldn't we, like, try to identify the victims and return their belongings to the bereav-"
Mumumuh," you shake your head almost violently. "Loot. Ours now."
"I guess... What're we even going to do with this stuff, though?"
You join Melanie in staring at the waist-high mound of gathered stuff. The money itself should be easy to just, y'know, take, but what about the rest?
"Mm." You've decided. Getting out your little storage box, you begin cramming the stuff into it. "Sort outside," you explain to Melanie, simultaneously summoning another ice platform and maneuvering it against the giant ugly owl thing.
Which you them proceed to circle to push onto it. With your mighty muscles awing even the likes of mythological Hercules (who was never as muscled nor as good-looking as yourself), you push the enormous cadaver onto the platform.
It weighs several tons and its size makes it- "Do you want a little help, Jackie?"
"... No," you decide. You shall not ask Melanie for help. This is a matter of pride now.
Long story short, you manage to bring everything outside, the body, the valuables, it's all there, floating with you and available for inspection. Naturally, Melanie does have her own questions, however. "So why'd you bring the body? Does it have to be hidden or disposed of so nobody nonmagical finds it?"
"... Use all parts of the body," you explain, feeling the sting of ice once again. It can't be helped, though, and you can stomach it for the moment. "Someone will pay for it, at least."
"... Huh."
More importantly right now, the loot. Most of it is mundane, but you're keeping it anyway- who knows when it could come in handy? You don't really need any of the cash (why bother with paper money when you can just take anything it could buy), but a very decent amount of it is set aside for Melanie.
She is your girlfriend, which means you shall be considerate and give her a bunch of it. This also excuses you for making her buy you food every now and then, which is even better.
As for the rest... You'll just keep it in storage. That said, one thing sticks out; a bracelet of sorts made of green stone, looking like it should be in some museum or something. Your magical sight immediately picks out the fact it's enchanted in some way, making you wonder how it managed to end up in all this mundane stuff.
You look at it from several angles, slowly identifying its magical signature. You... Think you get what it's for? Putting it on, you make a chopping motion toward you arm, being repelled by a barrier of sorts.
It basically conjures a small shield. Not immensely powerful, but useful if used right, you suppose.
Ah well. Seeing how you're out here in the real Generica already anyway, you may as well finally get around to answering the scattered messages a certain green-haired magical girl has been writing lately in the infinite goodness of your heart and mercy of your soul.
From the looks of it, she has been asking you to talk or meet up for a while, almost ever since you last saw each other during the subjugation of the monster whose corpse you later stole. You momentarily wonder if that may be what this is about- but no, as far as you're aware, none of the three girls have even the foggiest clue about anything regarding that part of business.
So it's probably some other, likely dumb, reason. You have found yourself reluctantly revising your opinion of Olivia's general usefulness- she is a barely adequate attack dog in the right situations, at least- but she is still rather slow in the head, you believe.
A very dumb puppy. Just one you can also fuck and therefore better.
Still, with the mentioned unending grace and saint-like patience inherent to your character, you decide to hear her out and call her number. Come to think of it, does this actually cost you anything or is magic just deciding you can call whoever you want for as long as you want?
Probably the latter.
"Jackie!"
"Muh."
"Finally, I was wondering if something happened to you." See how dumb she is, Olivia still hasn't grasped you're invincible. "Listen, I don't have much time, but can you meet me on the roof of my school in a bit? You still know the place, right?"
"Muh." Eh, looks like you'll actually be going there in person, after all. And here you were hoping things would end with a quick bit of phone sex or something.
Stupid Olivia. You had plans for today, too! Admittedly, those plans were pretty much just goofing around at home untransformed, but still, the nerve!
When you arrive at Olivia's school, you soon find the greenette (which is totally a word, you didn't just make this up) standing on the roof, already waiting for you. Seeing as she had the good sense not to make you wait after coming all this way, you nod in satisfaction and come floating down instead of positioning yourself high up in the sky to cast a menacing shadow at her beforehand.
Menacingly.
You also do see that it looks like she isn't actually alone, however; two figures are hiding around the corner from her position, behind the little rectangular piece of concrete with a door in it that pathetically normal people need to use to get on the roof. It would seem Bubbles and Magical Girl True Blade (if you remember her name right) are also around, though untransformed, as is Olivia.
(Detection is an automatic success thanks to Awareness)
Well, if she so desperately wants an audience, you shall allow it. They shall witness the absolute dominance and masculinity with which you stand above Olivia before long. For now, though, it would seem you have arrived, standing on the floating sheet of ice you allow yourself to be carried on. "Muh."
Your voice is as majestic as ever. Just the sliver of it imparted with the sound you make is enough to make reality shudder under its weight.
"Jackie, you're here," Olivia breathes happily. She is a good doggie, all she'd need is a tail wagging behind her. "Okay, so I don't have much time before the next lesson starts, is it okay if I get right down to it?"
It seems she is going to skip the foreplay of you forcing yourself on her and just strip so she can get fucked by you. Finally.
"When you left with Puchuu after we fought the big ugly owl thing, what happened between you afterwards? Because it hasn't returned ever since and we kind of need it."
... You are filled with nothing but disappointment and your day is ruined. "Muh."
... You want to just rape Olivia for making you come all this way just to ask some banal question like that, but whatever. Since you are such a helpful and just plain wonderfully benevolent, you shall enlighten her. "Brian wanted to talk to Puchuu," you explain in extreme and explicit detail.
"... Uhm, is Brian your Puchuu's name? Do you have a Puchuu?"
"Muh," you nod to both. Finally, Olivia is getting the idea. Before she can ask more unnecessary questions, you decide to go a step further and assume she has the brain capacity of a snail capable of following along in basic conversation. "Puchuu politics."
"I... see?" Oh, she's getting there. You may yet train her enough to be tolerable beyond as rapebait.
"Also, eavesdroppers," you say, lifting yourself up on your toes to bump a hand against Olivia's forehead. "Bad."
"Wait, what?!" She'll really have to learn if she wants you to not just abruptly abduct her or else intrude into her home every time you meet her. Olivia whirls around, easily finding the two heads peeking out from their hiding place. "Guys, seriously?!"
Bubbles and True Blade tumble out and into plain view, clearly having a lacking amount of coordination between each other. Your golems, thuggish and ill-bred as they are, are better than this.
"Sorry, but we wanted to make sure you're alright! Also, I blame Bubbles."
"Like, tehee, mai bad!"
Olivia sighs, shaking her head. "Anyway, sorry if this is a bother, but could you please get Puchuu back to us? It's nice and all it's got friends, but we were kind of hoping for help and directions from it," she concludes.
"Snaketail," you spontaneously decide before you can stop yourself. "Name is Snaketail."
"... That explains why it never told us."
Brian watched through the camera in its subject's brain, almost wishing it could eat popcorn to this show. Unfortunately, its body had been specifically made unable to eat anything as part of the comprehensive punishment detail it was on, but that did nothing to diminish the amusement it felt at this completely unintended, spontaneous and yet hilarious turn of events.
"Chuh, once it gets out it will forever be known by this name. I shall make sure of it." There was a reason this subject had turned out to be the best of them all yet ever since its incarceration to this material plane, not only rooted in its usefulness as a combat asset.
Despite the casual casting of a wonderfully fitting name, your mind is currently spinning and filling with ideas, one better than the next, about how to take advantage of this situation. However, outwardly you maintain a perfect poker face, continuing the conversation. "Will come back when it does. Can't make it."
Or at least not against Brian's will. Well, maybe you could, but you wouldn't, not unless Brian really pissed you off somehow. Speaking of which, you really have to talk to Brian about creating a fake Snaketail somehow to dupe these girls out.
"Figures," Olivia sighs, crossing her hands behind her back. "First chance it gets to laze around, it immediately does."
"Wonder who else that reminds me of," Kerrie chimes in with a glance to the side.
"Like, hey!"
"Someone has to do the dishes in the hideout and you never do."
Ignoring the byplay, Olivia shrugs. "But yeah, that sucks. We as a team were relying on him telling us what to actually, you know, do."
Luckily for them, you are very good at telling people what to do. "Muh, can help," you exclaim with the casual pride of a superior form of life. "Tell you where weak monsters are."
"Really?"
"Muh muh. Can pay with naked cuddles."
"... Olivia, I understand you have a lot of feelings for Jackie, but isn't she a little young to-"
"YOU GOT IT ALL WRONG AGAIN!"
"Eh, it's, like, whatever, you know? I fuck lotsa pedos, too!"
"Not you too, Bubbles..."
"Also, need to better supervise Snaketail," you add into the chaos starting to develop before you. "Dangerous magic prototype stuff, painful to clean up."
The only saving grace of that battle in particular was that only Brian was there to witness what happened when the thingy self-destructed in your face. Ouch.
You continue on like that a bit, watching the situation develop and occasionally mentioning a thing or two you believe will make the magical mascot's standing lower in the eyes of these magical girls. It seems your penchant for aptly manipulating people and office politics has not suffered ever since you turned into a magical girl, after all.
Nay, perhaps it has even improved, for your sly tongue works even better for gossiping about people behind their backs now! Yes, yes, Snaketail is just a lazy bum hanging around listening to music all day, obviously!
Clap, clap, clap, clap, clap!
Still, this is still a school and these three foolish girls still attend it, so eventually the bell rings, that characteristic unpleasant noise found in American school all over, sending the magical trio into a mild panic as they realize they're late for class.
School is stupid and sucks
You wave them goodbye as they disappear into the building, waiting a few minutes to make sure they're well and truly gone. Then you open the roof access door once more, one hand holding a certain cubical magical item.
You activate it, of course, your cube ensuring no mundane people will be able to perceive you for a couple hours. Time to go around the classes not containing magical girls and get up to some mischief!
Mischief that involves ramming your big, fat cock into any orifices you can find among the more attractive student population, absolutely ruining both cunts and asses. Many times you just tug and pull at clothes to reveal what you want, then finagle yourself under a student to fuck them into an incoherent mess still sitting on their chair, though female teachers and the like aren't spared either.
In fact, there's a few males feminine enough you also go ahead and seed them, just to make a point. In the end, although you don't rape your way through the school's entire unaware population, you still ensure a sizable amount of people will be crowding the toilets thinking they have some bad indigestion or something.
Aside from that one girl that took your entire cock like a champ, completely unaffected wherever you hammered into her. You'll remember her face for later.
Finally, with your usual lust sated for the moment, you decide to leave for the day, getting back to other important things. Such as eating chocolate you stole from a few of the students' bags or just hanging out.
The usual when you don't have anything important on your plate.
As you sit there on some random rooftop, as you have taken to doing whenever you're just killing some time but stuck in the real world, you quietly think about recent events and how they played out, deeply embroiled with introspective thoughts.
By which you mean you're sitting there drinking coke and eating sweets. You even consider transforming back to your 'normal' state (you think of it more as your weakened or sealed self), but no, you aren't protected behind copious amounts of deadly traps and monsters.
As in, monsters that do what you want and catch or murder any possible intruders. As the empress ruling over all of humanity and beyond (even if nobody knows about this yet), you always have to be careful of assassins and the like, after all.
Dastardly people. Anyone could be one, especially those lackeys of the old government you are going to overthrow and replace with your glorious governance in due time. Policemen, SWAT teams, the FBI and whatever other varied letter salads there are.
But anyway, back on topic. That is, although you don't really bother thinking back on things, as you are by necessity perfect and always do everything right just through virtue of being yourself, you can't help but have this niggling feeling that there was... something. Something just out of the reach of your mind, at the tip of your tongue so to speak. Like a word you know exists, but you can't actually recall it anymore.
This is intolerable, of course. Your mastery of language is supreme and must consequently be perfect. As perfect as yourself.
You close your eyes, turning your attention inwards. Something is up with your thought patterns, something that... you still can't quite put your finger on right now.
Which is still not alright with you, so you concentrate deeper. What could this be? Is it some malicious influence on your mind, an unseen monster laying some manner of vile curse onto you? Is it something Brian has installed way back and just never told you? Or perhaps-
You looove chocolate... You love sweet things... you love cookies...
Or perhaps it is some kind of sweets spirit that wants to fatten you up, not knowing your perfection extends down to the physical level and you never will grow any weight?
Oh, wait, can you hear me daddy?
Evidently, you can now communicate with a voice inside of your head calling you daddy. Evidently, you are perfectly sane and there is no need to worry.
No, wait, you aren't insane, daddy!
Of course not, it's not you, it's them! Everyone else is completely nuts, you're the only sane one! The world's an asylum, you're the only one outside of it, not stuck inside of your metaphorical fence, no, you're outside and have caged humanity inside!
Daddy, please stop, that joke was old before I was five.
Huh. You didn't realize the voice inside your head would have some elaborate backstory referencing some random comedy material you came up with on the spur of the moment. You really are extremely creative even on a subconscious level, it seems.
Mou! Daddy, stop joking around already please. This is serious.
Hey Serious, this is Jackie speaking.
THE DAD PUNS ARE STILL NOT HELPING
"Muh." You sharply disagree. Your humor is not only astute and hilarious, it also always helps whenever you employ it. In fact, it is one of your greatest ways to defuse complicated situations and make people come around to your standpoint.
By which you mean you torture people with puns until they beg you to stop.
Empathetic negotiation techniques. That's the technical term.
Still, if the voice inside your head is not actually an attempt of your subconscious to split up and create more of yourself in a sort of spiritual mitosis, what else could it possibly be?
Okaaay, so remember all the way back when Brian pulled us out of that wrecked car and told us what was going on?
You like the use of the first person plural. It serves to make everything sound more team-oriented.
Yeah, and all of that was lies. Or, well, not all of it, but most.
Le shock. Who would have ever thought Brian would have been anything less than completely and entirely honest.
I was the one that made you watch Puella Madoka. Or I will, anyway. Same difference.
And with that the voice in your head has lost you.
No, wait, urgh. Let me summarize this, your cranial tenant requests. Simply put, you know how magical girls sometimes are offered a wish in exchange for becoming one?
You must've forgotten to read that part of the recruitment pamphlet.
Too bad, because this is relevant. I was your daughter and my wish was to save you because you'd just gotten your ass roasted by Brian's last magical girl, daddy.
... And knowing Brian, he promptly proceeded to use that as an experiment somehow, you're guessing.
Ding ding ding, we have a winner, the voice in your head announces. You shall call it your head voice. The thing's solution was to dredge up your soul and splice it into me when he turned me by using a couple of coins, including a gold one, to create us.
Wait a second, a gold coin was used in your creation? That's, like, beyond what you've ever even seen so far!
As a consequence I don't think was actually intended, I'm stuck chilling in the back of our head now while you're in control. Being revived apparently had some memory issues, so Brian just ran with it and helped you construct your own story as to how you ended up and left it at that when I decided to hide out back here.
The back of your head isn't exactly for rent. Also, a gold coin?!
Believe me, it wasn't exactly how I was planning to do this, but at least I think I have some prophetic abilities now. I can predict stuff happening, especially on screens and such.
Huh. A modern day oraclwaaaiiit a minute, is that why you've been so happy to play video games lately? Is the voice of your (apparent) daughter making you play?
No, you're just a nerd.
That's funny, because you don't remember being one.
Okay, I like the entertainment when there isn't anything actually interesting to watch, you happy?
No, you are Jackie. Happy is a state of mind.
Kiiiiiiiiiiiiii!
But wouldn't you have remembered having had a daughter at some point? It's not like you...
Daddy, I love you and all, but you're the most self-destructive, horribly self-indulgent and utterly careless person I have ever met, and I went to school.
You aren't that bad.
Thoughts of yourself breaking your arms and legs over and over flash through your head, accompanied by a flurry of images of eating nothing but sweets and lazing around the house instead of going out to scavenge stuff because you just can't be arsed to get up and do stuff, as well as just staying in your transformed state permanently because transforming back and forth is just kind of a giant pain.
You know, normal things everyone does and feels all the time.
Your complete lack of self-reflection once again baffles me, daddy.
Hey, your daughter's disembodied voice has been talking about 'self' a lot. Maybe it shouldn't be so egoistic all the time?
Daddy, I am not disembodied, you're just using my body.
Potatoes, potahtoes.
Anyway, what this all comes down to is that I am here and can feel the things you do if I want to. I also think our standpoint on stuff like morals was combined and then completely shredded, for lack of a better word.
In other words, your daughter was an evil mass-murdering rapist and now so are you, got it.
Please, most of that was you. You literally helped me bury the teacher that was getting grabby with the female students.
WHO DARES TOUCH YOUR SWEETIE, THEIR SOULS SHALL BE HARVESTED AND SOLD TO A FESTERING RAPE DEMON TO BE SODOMIZED BY PUS FOR ALL ETERNITY!
Way ahead of you daddy. I also think I actually used to have some magical talent and the fusion just made it come to the fore, but don't quote me on that.
Not to worry, you shall quotemine her later when you have some time.
Please don't, it was horrible enough to hear the return of the puns.
"Muh," you say, taking a moment to consider everything you've just learned. "Muh, muh, muh."
Naturally, this means a whole slew of questions has been opened up. For example, which ice cream flavour-
Strawberry all day, maybe raspberry if I want something else.
A good choice. You shall endeavour to steal more of this kind of ice cream going forward.
Also, my name is Elena and a select chosen few are allowed to shorten it to 'Ellie' or 'El'.
Noted. Also, given your memory from before you were apparently revived in the middle of the woods is still kind of shot, any pointers on how your life was like before?
Well, let's see, you used to be a salary man and work at a company that did something with computers, I think, but you were always super bad with any technology.
That is a bald-faced lie. Electronics obey you like the queen-empress you are.
Probably because you're in my body now and things don't just break because you're in the same room.
Heresy.
Incidentally, I actually helped you out a lot whenever you had issues with that. Also, you really hated your job, but it paid well. Like, really well.
Duh, as if you'd actually sell your soul for anything less than the best you could expect.
You were also a serial killer.
No, that was your daughter, you've covered that already.
Nope, that was all you. You just couldn't help your temper and whenever you felt anyone was a real problem, you just took the shovel and disappeared for a day. The 'New York Reaper' they called you.
That sounds really far-fetched. New York is a big city, why would people go out of their way to give you some fancy name when there's hundreds and thousands of murderers running around at a minimum, statistically speaking?
Okay, I made that one up, but the reason we eventually had to move was because the police was getting close and skedaddling to the other end of the continent was the best we could think of.
She's almost making this sound like it was a family discussion.
It was. We sat down together and brainstormed with hot chocolate and jazz music until we decided to just run away.
That sounds like you. Actually, that sounds a lot like you.
I also couldn't keep on disappearing all the stupid teachers like I was. In hindsight, I think some magical stuff was going on at school which was why I did it.
Makes sense. It would've been a school and narrative logic just loves schools because schools mean students and students mean stories, more so than adults.
That can't be all, though. For example, you had a daughter- unless you misunderstand something about how human reproduction works, that means at least one other person was involved.
You never told me much about mom, your daughter echoes inside your head. I always got the impression she was dead, though.
Huh. Did you kill her maybe?
Nah, you probably killed whoever did it, though. Or whatever, could've been a magical thing.
That, too, sounds like you. Ah well, you can't say for sure either way so it'll probably remain a mystery forever.
Also, your name was Jack and you were the most handsome daddy ever so I told all my friends about it, but nevermind that!
You're about to get into that, but instead you find yourself a bit preoccupied with the mental picture drawn at you. A middle-aged man, decently fit, with short, dark hair and a surprisingly wide back- you'd have thought he'd be lankier working in some IT firm or whatever.
Appearance is... Above average, you'd say? You've always had trouble telling how attractive men are. It's just not...
Oh crap, you've just realized you used to not be into guys! That's kind a huge discovery!
Oh yeah, sorry about that. Lots of subconscious stuff was shared between us when we were mixed like a martini.
Eh, it's fine. Just the first thing you actually notice is different between before and after.
Well, lots of revelations to be had, you suppose. Any thoughts or opinions on how things have been going, for the record?
Eh, you're doing pretty fine? To be honest, I'm sure Brian has pumped us full of some experimental magic stuff and that's why we're so much stronger than anyone could normally expect from a new magical girl.
That is obviously all yourself. Brian is good, but he shouldn't get any credit for how incredibly diligent and smart you are in regards to this whole business.
Sure, keep telling yourself that.
You will!
Fine!
Fine! Also, would she like, say, a body or something? So she doesn't have to stay as an observer in your glorious brain?
It's my brain and no, I don't actually mind that much. It took a bit of getting used to, but being along for the ride without having to do everything myself has its perks.
Mhm, if she says so. You could probably swing something if you really tried, but as it is, you'll just leave it there, after all.
... Actually, a temporary body would be nice just for when it could come in handy. Maybe do something with those golem thingies?
That was your line of thought as well. Maybe something to look into in your idle time.
More importantly, you should go do more stuff with your runes already! That's such a ridiculous ability it's a miracle you haven't wiped out those bugs yet!
You don't like bugs. Could you not have to talk about them? Just remembering what happened last time you tried to take the initiative in that regard makes your stomach queasy and it would be a waste of chocolate if you had to throw up.
Just go do the thing!
Hold, wait. The portal won't be opening for a while yet so there's no real point in rushing anything.
Tsk!
So for now, you should just go and locate some strawberry ice cream to steal and some victim to thoroughly rape.
Your cube ran out of time earlier and you have the subtlety of a train meeting an iceberg, daddy.
The train would be the thing made of ice in that analogy.
Just go buy a few scoops normally and relax for a while, whatever.
... What is this 'buy' Elena speaks of?
Don't make me get up and make you, I know you kept some change from this morning!
... You will almost assuredly murder someone if you try.
We'll cross that bridge when we get to it, now chop chop!
Man, your daughter sure is bossy, huh?
I have to be if I want to get anywhere with you. Especially with you at the steering wheel.
It was a long and tense battle, but finally you have your two waffles of strawberry ice cream ('one for yourself, one for your friend') and then, even, managed to eat both without any melting, an ability not unlike the holy grail of thermodynamics in its fundamental importance to the human condition.
If your perfection can even still be described as human, of course. Which it probably can't.
Anyway, now that you're (finally) back home, you can set toward doing what your daughter keeps telling you to stop procrastinating on, finding a more efficient way for you to apply runes without losing (too much) quality in the end work. Naturally, you have a few ideas on how to do this already, but just to be sure you make Elena tell you what she would suggest, too.
Because you're a wonderful leader and make a point to listen to your subordinates' thoughts and opinions even if you do end up ignoring them afterwards anyway. All hail the Jackie.
You know I can still hear you, right? Also, try making a lattice with your ice first, like so, then...
Huh, would you look at that. It actually works. You wouldn't have expected that.
Of course it works, I'm a genius!
Hmm... As you are a genius, as is she, does that make you a double genius through being made up of both? A genius squared?
The exact mathematics behind this may need to be worked out separately.
But now that we know how to do this, you have to promise to actually work with these runes, okay?
Ugh, if you have to.
You do. And that seals your fate. Adieu, oh pleasant and carefree paradise, hello oh cruel world of corporate politics and deadlines.
I'm making you do a minimum of preparation every day in a dangerous profession. This is nothing like actually working a job.
Sure, like she would know. Not like Elena has actually worked a nine-to-five before.
You don't actually remember how it is, either!
Some things leave traces on your soul, carving them in with the unfeeling and casual contempt of a pile of paperwork and office supplies calling for you. You remember enough.
And that isn't even the only conversation you're having here.
"Chuh, and you say you can communicate freely?" Brian, ever the inquisitive mind, wasted no time in hitting you up as soon as you returned home, not even pretending not to know about your newfound connection with your daughter.
"Muh. Off my face." You lift him off the desk where he is standing onto your lap, where he can look up at you all he wants without getting in the way so much.
"Chuuh, if you are actually stable, that means the fusion was far more successful than anticipated. Instead of simply merging the consciousnesses involved, it managed to retain both original subjects as concrete entities, puchuchuh, by almost complete accident."
"Subconscious cross-contamination," you note at the assertion that Brian did perfect work. Which he cannot, for only you are perfect.
"Mild side-effects, barely anything to write home about, chuh. Are you feeling particularly stable, chuh?"
"Muh." If you knew he'd be that much of a pain, you'd have just done this outside instead.
Elena woke up, giddy and anticipatory even as she lay under her warm and toasty blanket. She was tempted to stay in bed a while longer, she didn't need to get up that day... But she really couldn't wait, after all.
Throwing everything off, she bounced up off her bed, stretching and wiggling her everything to wake up properly. Hopping a little, she went to her closet, rummaging through it to gather up a few things to wear; just her pink panties, a loose shirt and her thick socks.
She couldn't wait any longer, her birthday was waiting!
Darting out past her desk (and high-powered gaming computer afforded by her generous allowance (that she was totally earning by helping her daddy out with work)), Elena burst out of her room, feet pounding the thick carpet of their home as she ran to the kitchen where she could already smell just what she wanted to.
"Daddy!!!" She squealed, bumping into her daddy who'd backed off from the stove when he heard her. Giving him a biiig hug, she laughed happily. "It's my birthday!"
"It's your birthday, sweetie!" Elena giggled when her daddy mussed up her hair. "But I need to pay attention to the pancakes before we celebrate."
"Okay." She pouted, but even she couldn't pretend she was feeling it. It was her birthday! Her birthdays were the most special days!
"Hup." Her daddy flipped the pancakes in the pan, getting the powdered sugar ready on the side. Elena's mouth was watering already- her daddy's pancakes were always thick and fluffy and just sweet enough to be perfect with lots of sugar on top.
"You didn't forget my birthday before today, did you?"
"Of course not," her daddy shook his head with a smile. "I've got your gifts and everything ready."
Elena couldn't help herself- she squealed again. Today was going to be so great!
Elena sat on the couch, patting her belly. The pancakes, as always, had been perfect- fully satisfactory for her birthday, in other words. Now she just needed to wait for her daddy to come join her, she'd already put the dishes into the dishwasher and all.
She considered turning on the television, but listening to her yearly week-long vacation happening was even better.
"Yes, Elena caught a bad flu- you know how it is this time of year, one moment they're just fine, the next they're lying in bed and coughing up a storm," her daddy said into his phone. "I'll be keeping her home for the week just in case, wouldn't want to cause a pandemic at school."
Every year on her birthday, daddy would call school and tell them she was sick and should stay home. It worked every time and she got to spend all that time just lazing around and play computer games all day instead of having to waste half her day pretend to listen to some dirtbag teacher blather on while she did homework for the previous class.
Life was so much better this way. Not to mention her presents, daddy always picked out the best ones!
Hanging up, he came to join her in the living room, shaking his head. "I really need to come take a look around your school again one of these days, the lack of deaths has clearly had them drop their guards." He sat down next to her, giving her a grin. "Anyway, is my birthday girl looking forward to her gifts?"
"Heck yeah, bring 'em on!" She couldn't fucking wait. "I've been waiting for this all year!"
Daddy laughed and pulled a box out from next to the couch, where Elena hadn't seen anything. "Well here you go, then!"
She tore it open immediately. Then she stared, her eyes growing wide and her mouth open to gasp.
"That is the most beautiful knife I have ever seen."
"Mhm, it's an antique, was pretty hard to track down even," daddy said, pointing at the well-used leather grip and repeatedly sharpened edge. It had to be as long as Elena's forearm! "Went through both World Wars and back, changing owners several times. Most often through the previous one being killed by the next. At least twenty confirmed kills that I could find when I dug into it, probably a couple times that."
Elena picked the weapon up with reverence, feeling the weight of the blade. She could agree to that weird thing she'd read on a book once, about how weapons that'd been used to kill had a feeling of their own to them, a weight that was a little bit more.
She instantly loved it, and not just because of how awesome it was. Her daddy had put a lot of thought into it! "Where'd you even get it?"
"Oh, a certain descendant of a certain soldier gave it to me. He didn't need it where I sent him, using this very same knife," he grinned. "Happy birthday, sweetie."
Elena vibrated with happiness. Carefully putting the knife down, she leaned over and pulled herself up on her daddy's shoulder, giving him a kiss on the cheek. "This is the bestest shit ever."
"Oh, I don't know, I do try to make every year special," daddy joked, straightening her hair out a little. She allowed it with dignity. "I'll teach you how to use it later, just the basics so you don't hurt yourself."
"Do you even know how to use a knife?" She asked doubtfully. "You're a shovel person, aren't you?"
"Excuse me, I use whatever works best in a given situation. Of course I know how to use a knife," he scoffed playfully in response. "I always have my backup knife on me just in case. And this isn't all, of course- I got you a few books I thought you might like, too."
Her silly daddy, always trying to lure her away from her computer with books. She'd read each and every single one of course (her daddy got them for her after all), but she wouldn't be defeated this easily!
Elena's birthdays always were the very best!
Jack stretched his limbs, another long day of working his day job having him reconsider just quitting and living off of investments or something. Then again, something like this was a great cover for his hobby, so... He'd bear with it.
It would be much more bearable, of course, if the coffee machine gave something actually palatable instead of the disgusting tar they had to deal with around the place, but dear little Elena had said she liked it better when he didn't drink coffee in the first place, so... sacrifices had to be made.
He could always bring a water heater to work and just drink some goddamn tea or something. Actually, that sounded like a great plan, now that he thought about it.
Already in a better mood, Jack gave his daily workload one last look. Technically, he was supposed to... Well, it was a bit embarrassing, but he had no fucking idea what his job entailed, technically. To his credit, though, neither did anyone else and he still got everything he was asked to do done just fine.
Most of this stuff was tech support at the end of the day. Just because the company dealt with computers and operating systems and... Things like that, didn't mean any given employee had any idea what they were doing. Case in point, Jack himself.
The one big difference between him and the average Joe working in the same corporate structure was that he knew how to get at the solutions of problems he didn't know how to solve himself. The internet, glorious thing that it was, held all the answers one could ask for, as long the right questions were presented- at the end of the day, any old intern could do the same crap Jack was doing, the difference was that people thought of him as the tech wizard around the place.
Which he decidedly wasn't. Just this workday his own work computer had frozen up twice, bluescreened once, given him a dizzying array of notifications he had no idea what to do with and de-installed the anti-virus software once so he had to get that on there again.
Most of what he did was really trying to get him own shit in order. Amazingly enough, as long as he wasn't doing it in person and just giving through instructions, things usually worked out fine.
How that worked was a mystery.
Oh, and in particularly problematic cases he ended up just asking his daughter for help. She was the real computer wizard in the house.
Speaking of Elena, she should be coming home soon, so he'd best get going already. Having shorter work days just came with being higher up in the word salad that was modern job descriptions, after all.
Even if he still had no idea what exactly the Chief Technological Supervisor Executive was supposed to be doing compared to any of the other IT monkeys two floors down.
On the way out, he met a bunch of his 'colleagues', most of which were just more of the same old dreary, morose office workers doing their daily thing while trying to avoid the things floating through the hallways and get through their days.
It really was quite annoying to dodge the various demoted employees hanging around the building, just waiting for someone's touch to activate. It was an incredible mess every time, even if Jack got there in time to begin dismembering them.
Especially the days when Dave from Accounting worked on-site. The man was a nervous wreck and triggered them all the time. Jack seriously considered just murdering him to get rid of that whole thing, but... No, he had to make sure nobody could connect things to him.
And making it look like an accident would take too long and be too prone to accidentally activating another building-wide lockdown. Yet another major annoyance and the reason he always had a crowbar and a fire axe on hand in his office these days.
Ah well, maybe one of the punks on the way back home would give him an excuse to work off some steam.
Jack made it a point to drive slowly and conspicuously look at each and every one of them, but none of the two-meter thugs in the area he usually frequented made his day. He might need to vary up his route if someone had found the bodies from last time.
Jack looked around as casually as they came, dragging the body off toward the moron's house. He was one of those types; asked too many questions of the wrong sort, basically begging to be taken out by someone at some point.
Honestly, Jack had made it a sport to ensure his sweetheart's safety ever since she was born and as comprehensively as he could. If someone asked too many questions about her, looked at her through windows or even dared approach her directly, he immediately switched into his 'professional' mode.
This entailed gathering information of his own. Utilizing the internet, naturally, but also doing some good old-fashioned stalking and personal observation, all the while making sure nobody would connect him to those odd... accidents that tended to happen to those people that actually might be going after his daughter.
Christ's sake, even if she was incredibly adorable and, from an objective standpoint, both cute and beautiful, he'd even go so far as to admit she would be one of the most beautiful women in the world once she grew up (just like her mother had been...), that was no fucking excuse to go leering after her. Or anything more, of course.
It was a sort of civic duty, Jack reasoned, to fucking butcher any pedophiles that would dare to breathe the same air as his darling daughter. And anyone that might be one, or become one... Well, the list went on, but he did try not to be too hasty about these things.
More than enough other assholes humanity wouldn't miss to kill out there, after all.
Anyway, using the pilfered keys he got off the asshole he decided to... approach proactively, Jack opened the door, dragging the man into his own home in the suburbs. It was a tad bit cold today, just the kind of weather for a bit of cozy fireplace rest.
Bah, or a gas fire barbecue, whatever. Why'd he have a house in this area, but then not have a fireplace? It was mistifying.
A few by now practiced movements and everything was set up just fine. An unforeseen gas leak, a burning candle in another part of the house, windows all closed because of how cold it was... Why, the just about perfect crime scene!
Of course the body was already dead beforehand, strangled to death by a decently strong and enthusiastic enough man and his wire, but who could ever tell? Criminology and associated fields were good these days, but not that good.
And even then, they wouldn't ever find him in the end. Why, everyone knew he had dinner with his daughter around this time, the neighbours had seen him and everything (he always made sure to greet them on his way through, too). Sure, there was somewhat of a secret path out of his home he sometimes took, but why, nobody had to know.
And if anyone tried to find out, well, he had enough skeletons in his closet a few more wouldn't really matter either way.
Jack whistled to himself as he hurried home. He did hate to leave Elena alone around this time, but she was probably fine, just playing one computer game or another.
As long as she kept up with her school work and kept fit, it wasn't like he had any objections to that, of course, though he did wish she'd veer towards a more classical hobby; like reading books or something. It was what had gotten him into his 'hobby', too, after all. But hey, as long as she was happy, he was, too.
Now if only that old lady from next door wouldn't make such a fuss all the time... She might just need to accidentally poison herself somehow. A project for another day, Jack supposed.
"DIE! DIE! DIEEEE! YOU FUCKING BITCH, I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU SO HARD YOU'LL BE DEAD A HUNDRED TIMES OVER!"
"Having fun, sweetie?"
"I am, daddy! And now DIE ALREADYYY!"
Jack sighed. Kids, really. He'd just make sure she got enough to drink and maybe a snack later.
Olivia lay awake in bed, struggling to fall asleep. That wasn't anything she was unfamiliar with, if anything she was more used to it than not ever since Caroline... went and her parents started staying up late every night.
But this time it was a little different. Her thoughts weren't circling around the things they usually were, instead having changed directions.
She didn't like to admit it, but... She kind of liked Jackie. Even if the pushy younger girl really should learn to be patient and try to talk more, and be less pushy, not always be so rough and demanding (and pushy) and hopefully be a little gentler with Olivia in general when they did... that kind of stuff.
Also, did she mention the other girl was pushy?
Anyway, if she wasn't so rough, Olivia wouldn't even mind all the naughty things they ended up doing all the time. Except they hadn't done so lately, so...
Ugh... She was just a little frustrated, okay?
So she was lying in bed, thinking back to the times Jackie had been... Not gentle, because Jackie never was, but the times that'd felt good for her. And to what she had felt during those times exactly.
It wasn't long before Olivia found herself touching herself, her hands acting almost of their own volition, just rubbing and teasing down there. Before long, and completely outside of her own control, those same hands sneaked their way inside her pyjama pants, making her gasp as she explored the places Jackie had so thoroughly debased over and over again.
Her pillow may or may not have been bitten a few times that night, despite her having no influence over the fingers ploughing inside of her over and over again and teasing her most sensitive spots.
This was probably alright, too.
"How 'bout this?" You ask, creating a new golem. Most of this is just experimentation until you manage to create one that does what it's supposed to.
The golem raises its arm, pointing it away from yourself (and the house). A few clinking sounds are made, the arm waved around a little... then in explodes into splinters.
Another failure, then. Are you sure you know what you're doing, daddy?
You are. This isn't that complicated in theory, you just need to settle on a functioning design. The golems can't shapeshift freely, but you can make minor changes to their structure, so-
Why not just let them do some minor shapechanging instead to make this work?
"Muh." You shall consider Elena's proposal once she has submitted it in writing through the proper documentation and channels. In triplicate.
Muh.
The bureaucracy must expand to meet the needs of the expanding bureaucracy. That is simply the way the world shall work once you take it over.
Including all the bugs?
Bugs shall be subject to genocide until further notice.
Not all parts of your day are spent in quiet and productive training, of course. Not only is Elena insistent on having you not just laze around the house for hours whenever the mood strikes you, she is actively encouraging you with the promise of leaving you alone and doing nothing if you're a 'good girl'.
Which is preposterous, of course. You are the best girl by definition.
Yes, yes, now come on, time for magical programming class.
You hate the idea of doing anything related to school. Or computers.
Your work is largely focused around the concept of finding a safe way to disengage from a threatening enemy; or rather, finding another one you have made of your own.
Of course no enemy could ever truly threaten you, but should you find yourself impressed by a foe's no doubt prepared positions and unfairly acquired countermeasures combined with the sheer spunk it takes to go up against you, you may want to magnanimously leave the wretched being or beings that dare to do so alive for just a short while longer.
Suuure.
Also, you can always cease bothering taking all these boring security measures while working. You could just regenerate a few lost limbs easily.
Don't mind me, don't mind me.
Naturally, as you are an equal-opportunity brain, you shall allow Elena to exercise her creativity and pursue a project of her own. You can already tell she will be lost as to the endless opportunities offered by your immense magical prowess and unlimited possibilities, so you-
I want bombs. Big bombs.
... Whyever would you need bombs? If there is anything you are aiming to destroy, your superior magic can simply-
Remember the Glowwolf?
Of course you do. The foul beast besmirching the streets of Randomica, running wild until you faced it in honorable combat-
Bombs are good. Putting bombs inside of things is even better, and having disposable minions that can tackle a monster's insides after infiltrating them before they blow themselves up is the best. It also means you can just equip golems with them and still blow everything up with your magic... but now you can blow things up from everywhere at once.
... Elena is making a good point. You do like demonstrating your superiority through making your foes explode. Or pierce them with giant icicles, but exploding stuff is a close second.
Exactly. Now get to it, and make sure they can be triggered as the situation requires.
"Muh." So bossy...
"Chuh, what'cha doing?" Oh, you know that tone. Brian is only ever this chipper when he's doing science.
"Discussing the merits of suicide bombing with the voice inside my head," you explain. You're untransformed, so your throat is a lot better than it was a few days ago... Even if it still hurts a little even like this.
"I see, chuh. Keep going." Brian's tail swishes and you get the distinct impression something just happened, but you have no idea what.
Whatever, back to work.
Somehow, this is giving you a case of deja vu. You have created twenty golems for the time being, the draw on your magic significant, but manageable for the moment (they are simply so powerful they require most of your magic to be sustained), loaded Elena up to one of them so she can lead them into battle and equipped them with the rune bombs you already had on hand, vowing to get right back on creating more.
After a short ice cream break.
Still, you're giving Elena explosives and sending her off with several golems. Why does this make you feel nostalgic?
"Muh, you got everything? Need anything?"
We're about as well-equipped as we can be, your daughter states. Maybe having some weapons would be nice, but we don't exactly have anything like that for golems on hand. Something for later.
"Muh." Disposable minions are disposable. Hence why you aren't giving your sword to her... At least not right now, when you aren't expecting this body to come back.
Alrighty daddy, I'm gonna go have fun! Don't wait up for me, 'kay?
Elena hummed the Mission Impossible theme as she peered around the corner, easily lowered onto all fours with her long, strong arms. Not out loud, of course, because the body she was controlling wasn't capable of humming, but mentally.
That counted.
She and her warband were out to inflict some serious damage before they were killed and had to respawn back at base. And she was making it sound like a video game, but... That was pretty much what it was, wasn't it?
So she would treat it as such. Simple as that.
She could even communicate with her teammates as though per headset, so it was pretty much like that as well. Except it was all handled telepathically, but hey, just meant she didn't need to deal with any of them mumbling into their mic or anything.
That was always super annoying. She made it a damn point to kick anyone like that off the team whenever she could.
There they went, sneaking through the abandoned Overcity. It was a great urban battlefield, with much more realism than she was used to, but then again they were also carrying no guns and instead were guns themselves, so...
She was making it a point to be circumspect, keeping hidden as they circled the suspected location of enemy HQ. They'd dodged a few flying patrols by simply hiding inside buildings, easily forcing their way through doors and windows, as a golem's size generally made it hard to get through the grates that lead into the sewers.
Tunnel warfare would have been fun, too.
Now, though, now she decided what she was seeing was a reason to act. It was an old tradition, from the long before, that Elena would help her daddy out with two kinds of problems: Computer stuff and bugs.
Her daddy had gotten over computer stuff now, apparently, but instead lost any and all self-control when it came to creepy-crawlies. And the teeming mass of arm-length roach-like insects that was spewing out some kind of biological concrete all over the place, building up an outpost of some kind, was most certainly a bad infestation her daddy needed... help with.
Okay, here's the plan, she thought at her possibly useful mooks. There's probably something guarding this place, so we'll attack in a pincer movement. Half of us sneak around the perimeter, the other half waits here. We all attack at once and whoever finds the guards delays them while the other team trashes this place.
The golems shared looks (they didn't have faces nor eyes) and nodded (waved their head stumps up and down). Good enough.
Elena, being the responsible team leader, took nine others to execute the encircling maneuver. Coordinated through being connected back to daddy so she could relay orders easily ("Muh."), they stormed the biological construction like one man.
Golem. Whatever.
Together they charged, ramming into the structure like a swarm of horny battering rams. The material cracked, still fresh and undried, and they set out to either punch and slam into it to widen those cracks or smash and stomp out the small bugs Elena now realized were some kind of ant-termite cross or something.
That was, until a truly ungodly sound was heard, the vibration unpleasant against her icy body. "Sk-reeeek!"
Climbing out of the rubble she was kicking in came one ugly motherfucker.
Daddy, daddy, look what I found!
Muuuh!
It was still super cute how her daddy recoiled at the mere thought of bugs like this.
Elena, on the other hand, simply raised her arm, as did the rest of her team. The bug was promptly riddled with sharp splinters of ice, piercing its flexible exoskeleton and nailing it in place.
More were already coming from underground. Elena knew no fear, for she had planned for this. Lob 'em!
Working in teams, her golem subordinates cleared a space wherever they could, oftentimes breaking the ground before them, so that the ones armed with the magical grenades could throw them right into where the opposition was coming from.
No outpost upgrading on her watch! And the explosion was damn satisfying, too, tearing down everything above the ground, reducing the stuff these bugs were building with to scattered rubble.
And killing hundreds of the smaller bugs, as the force of the explosions tore through whatever underground spaces they had dug out beneath their feet.
Mission accomplished!
Of course then the ground continued to shake, tremors giving way to dozens of the large worker ants coming out to fight.
Time to test out just how far she could take this team!
After a long and arduous few hours, you take a break, having completed your current project and deciding that making the rune bombs in groups of three is the most realistic approach when you want to make them right. This involves leaving your little workshop that seems to have shifted places after Brian's newest renovations and actually coming back up into the rest of the house.
Most of the golems you created are destroyed by this point, only four of them remaining. To be honest, you would have expected them all to be done for at this point as they're obviously seeing heavy combat, so-
You make the mistake of looking out the window. Daddy, look, we won and brought this back!
You are already hiding in the bathroom, having frozen the door shut. You shall proceed to hide in this bathroom until this sudden assault on your bug-free paradise is removed, preferably in as destructive a manner as possible.
Want me to throw these into the Blast Furnace?
Yes. Yes, that would be acceptable. Cleanse this taint upon your frozen domain with fire.
-Okay, so that's... Jack
-He looks like a great dad
-A great murderous dad
-Notice the names
-Jack-Jackie? You think Elena changed her name to resemble her dad's?
-Would explain how she is
-Jackie is a perfectly rational girl
-Totally
-Are we gonna talk about how he apparently worked in some magical hellhole and got veiled from it?
QM: Parallel and pocket dimensions exist where lots of magical beings are common
QM: Sometimes you can just go into them and normal people never even realize they've gone elsewhere
QM: Some are just considered as part of an otherwise mundane city
-Yeah, but wouldn't he have known in the moment, at least?
QM: He did, he just didn't really care
-Tfw you're in hell and everything is afraid of you
-So he was a serial murderer that turned his hobby into his job
-Nah, his job was computer consulting
-He was just bad at it
-Tbf that's the most relatable thing about him
-Still a great dad
-He let Elena play video games all day
-No wonder how she turned out
-Dude, you dissing on games?
-Burn the heretic
-SIN BIN
-Dude, way too meta
-Question, where did all of this take place?
QM: New York
-Bummer
-We're on the west coast, right
-Yeah, Generica has coast to the west
-Okay, so the people he killed aren't important
-More importantly, how strong was he exactly?
QM: He was a fit man with a lot of weapons
-Did he own a shotgun?
QM: he owned several
-We're screwed
-Too much Mad Bastard Energy
-Never go to NY
-Was he also a rapist?
-Considering everything else
QM: Not much of one
QM: His daughter, on the other hand...
-DAMMIT
-Yuri struggle snuggle achieved?
QM: Well, you'll figure it out eventually
This interlude was brought to you by NegaQuest Productions, Olivia Edition
Elena sighed, forlorn and bored. Her head was resting on her hand as she waited for the bell to ring.
"Elena, how about you come to the blackboard?" She eyed her math teacher, Mister Fiddleton with even more boredom. So great was the soul-crushing nothing she felt that it threatened to slip out and overwhelm him, its pressure so great he was paralyzed with fear at the abyss she was projecting.
Or maybe she was just giving him a death glare for daring to pull her out of her incredibly bored, but still bearable funk. Either way the man was a useless twit that mostly just taught by the book.
One of these days, she was going to be genuinely annoyed at him. That would be his last day.
She kept on staring him down for daring to call on her for the last couple minutes until the bell finally rang, signaling lunch time.
Joy.
Eschewing the slop you got served in this craphole, Elena took out her boxed lunch as she sat down, presiding over her personal table. She'd etched her name into it with acid she'd smuggled out of the chem classroom, so nobody was allowed to dispute her ownership, either.
Her usual clique didn't take long to assemble, so at least she could waste some time by ascertaining the scheduled rule of her domain. And, ugh, talk a little. "Is that slumber party thing still on?"
"Yeah, totally. You, like, coming after all?" One of her nearly completely faceless minions said. Not literally faceless, Elena just barely bothered to remember her name, much less her face,
"No, you stupid bint, I already said I wouldn't," she sighed, enjoying the chastised look. "Who is all going?"
She needed to know how and where relationships were going. Nothing was more enjoyable than tearing people apart and mashing them together at her leisure. Well, nothing at school, anyway- the whole place was a bore.
She didn't even respect most of her teachers. Mostly because they just weren't worthy of any shred of respect. Speaking of... "You got that camera set up in the changing room?"
"Yup. If the coach is actually sniffing girls' panties, we'll know soon." That was what she wanted to hear. Incriminating evidence and blackmail in one and all it took was sacrificing a small part of her allowance. "Still super exciting we put it there."
"... is it?" Elena asked. "It'd be one thing if it was a boy, but one of us girls fiddling with something isn't suspicious at all, so it wasn't any big feat of stealth or anything."
She took a drink from her thermos can. (Almost) Fresh green tea, just what she needed to bear the enormous waste of time that was school.
Not that she really needed to study. Like, she did, because she didn't want to disappoint her daddy, but her grades were pretty much unassailable for a wholly different reason.
"It's still super awesome you just hacked into the school's network," one of the girls at her table whispered, making Elena roll her eyes. "That's, like, spy shit, isn't it?"
"Hardly, it's actually easier than it looks," she said, feigning modesty.
Truth be told, it really was just easy. Hacking wasn't this rapid tapping on keyboards and frantic outmaneuvering of firewalls and security measures most people thought of after watching some random-ass movie; the real way you did it was by finding out passwords and just doing whatever you wanted once you were inside a given system.
Sometimes it was a bit more complicated than that, but their school had jumped straight onto digitalization, doing anything that could be done via computers with them. Except few people in charge had any idea what they were even doing, so all it took was figuring out the password she needed and she could give herself a 'hidden' account.
One that could edit anything she damn well wanted. Turned out selling better grades to a few struggling students was actually pretty lucrative, too. She put that cash towards her own gaming hardware and her college account, fifty-fifty.
And she could choose her customers and press other students into doing whatever she wanted, too. All because some numbskull literally had their password set to '12345'. Suckers.
Then Elena heard a throat being cleared behind herself. Half-turning, she eyed the teacher- an old wannabe-disciplinarian that practically lived in the music rooms up on the fifth floor. It got unbearably hot up there in the summer, which may be the reason she looked like a dried-up prune in the right lighting. "Anything I can do for you?"
"You could be eating your school lunch, young lady," the bitch returned, throwing Elena's feigned politeness back in her face. "Your parents-"
"My parent," she said, making sure to play the 'single dad' card, "would tell you the same thing I am, that this disgusting shit they pretend is food around here isn't fit to be fed to a dog. I'm getting a healthy lunch and if you want to bitch about it, you can call my home and get chewed out for an hour straight."
Because her daddy was awesome. That was just how the world worked. And with that she turned right around and continued to eat, ignoring the sputtering cunt behind herself.
Of all the ways Elena had expected her schoolday to end, this was perhaps not the most likely, though she wasn't exactly complaining. She was just considering how to solve this situation before going home.
Diplomacy or fighting? Cry 'rape' or pull her knife?
"Been way too up your own ass all year, bitch," the boy that'd apparently decided he had a problem with her growled, slowly coming closer. His buddies seemed to be content to stand behind him to the sides, at least. "Time someone knocked you down a peg."
"... 'Scuse me, who are you again?" She wondered aloud. She did have trouble differentiating faces sometimes. "Were you, uh, Billy or Andy or what?"
"My name's Grandy and I'm gonna-"
"Right, Grandy," she snapped her fingers. "Is this about how I took your little girlfriend from you? That what this is about? You mad I'm a better guy than you, bro?"
"I'll fuckin'-" He snarled, lunging at her... Except Elena immediately turned and ran.
"Help, help, they wanna hurt me!" She cried in her most helpless voice, giving the gobsmacked trio a shit-eating grin.
Coming home, Elena felt nice and refreshed. She'd ended up just leaving the idiot (she didn't even remember his name anymore) to run once she started screaming, letting her finally get to the important part of her day.
"Daddyyy!" Jumping, she gave her daddy a big ol' hug. "How was work? What's for dinner?"
Her daddy laughed, messing up her hair. "Work was fine, sweetie, just had to use the shovel a bit more than usual. How's lasagna sound, we still have some left?"
"Lasagna's fine. Listen, though, you won't believe what happened today. I was so tempted to just kill half a dozen people that were just too stupid to live, and one of them even tried to threaten me!"
"Mmhm," he hummed, meaning he was already thinking. Yes! "Why don't you go wash up while I get dinner on the way and you can tell me all about it?"
"Okay!" And just like that, she was gonna get rid of the whole family of...
Shit, she'd already forgotten his name again! Elena took her phone, quickly writing to one of her minions she usually asked about this stuff. Who was that one idiot again?
You awake with a start, feeling like you had a nightmare of the most grotesque and warpedly sick degrees. Then you realize that no, it wasn't a dream, your unruly daughter actually brought the corpses of the unholy abominations you sent her to purge from reality back home.
And you saw them.
Normally, when you are confronted with these giant bugs, you have had time to mentally prepare yourself or at least school your mind to the extent you are aware you could be turning a corner and suddenly, bam, giant magical insects terrorizing you anywhere you go.
The thing is, that only happens outside of your home. Your… safe space.
Please do not become an SJW, daddy.
Nevertheless, it is a brand new day! One you shall celebrate by forgetting all about yesterday's trials and tribulations and instead looking forward into the future!
No, seriously, daddy, I'm not sure I could live with it if you actually started giving a fuck what anyone else thought.
Into the future!
Oh, alright. If we're actually planning ahead, could we please try to tinker with that magical essence business? I figure anything we can do to use it more effectively is going to pay for itself.
The futuuure… You need some ice cream.
You throw off your bedsheets (yes, you have two of them for maximum comfiness), letting morning air hit your body.
And you need clothes.
Please, you can just create them. Or better yet, transform already, you'll be spending most of the day in costume anyway.
But first, breakfast ice cream!
Most of your day is spent being a better scientist than Brian and making your golems fight each other or do manual work for your amusement, such as turning their hands into flat shovel heads (a trick they obviously learned from watching you somehow) and digging trenches into the rapidly growing forest surrounding your house just in case you need to employ trench warfare against your foes and install machine guns somehow to mow them down as they come.
Yes, you know you don't have any. Yes, you know the forest will most likely reclaim the trail of dug-out earth that has by now replaced concrete and asphalt. And yes, you know your golems are a pack of thugs instead of actual soldiers. But, in order, you can just get some somewhere or make Brian make some, you shall make the forest accept your trench warfare as a viable tactic and your golems can be conscripted to defend the motherland at any time regardless of their opinion on it.
Recruits can talk all they want, they're still the ones first thrown into the fire. Or waves of horrible eldritch chitin. Whatever.
I feel you're taking parts of this a little too seriously, daddy.
That is, however, not all you are doing. For one, you shall be consulting your chief scientific advisor on several matters while simultaneously putting your chief rapebait slave to work on corralling the imps you have had her summon and flush into the fog world you have stolen into actually usable disposable shocktroopers for when the time to expand your Lebensraum against the unreasonable existence of insectoid lifeforms has come!
… Look, I get the idea, but your Hitler impression really needs some work.
Pah. Everyone's a critic some days.
"So, uh, you do know most of these things are too stupid to be commanded, do you?" The anal demon asks when you bring her the good news of her actual usefuless.
She's got a point, most of these things are just babbling vermin.
"Muh," you make, unwilling to agree to the point. "Make it useful vermin then."
"… Can I just, dunno, beat them up and make them obey me for later? They're still demons, they'll understand violence well enough."
Oh, can I join in? That way I can have your golems command the trash around. It'll be double the minion-ness!
"Muh, fine. Still need a few for-"
"Chuuuh." You hear the sound you've been waiting for, turning around to find Brian has approached the summoning (and flushing) chamber while you were making preparations. "Jackie, chuh, why are your golems throwing these things at me?"
You hear a small boom as one of the golems you set to following Brian around fires off a small part of its body at the Puchuu, one of the venomous spinies attached to the piece of ice being shot off through the sharp needle-like protrusions burrowed into it. Brian deftly dodges it, of course, but the purpose, that of making him pay attention, has been achieved.
"They have venom. Make something useful."
Speaking has been a little easier lately.
"Chuuh," Brian makes, but you have neither the time nor the patience to listen to him.
"Also, there's an ugly owl corpse. And this weird essence. Tell me about them."
"Should've just left you to freeze over from the inside, chuh," your 'trusty and reliable' advisor mutters to himself before speaking in his normal volume again. "I have been wondering why we had an owl wendigo's body lying around, puchuh."
See, he's already giving you new information. Good tutorial NPC is already fulfilling his role.
I have no idea whether this idea is my fault, but please, go on like this. It's hilarious.
You're here, but not Larious. You're Jackie.
…
"Chuh, this thing used to be an owl until it got infected, most likely by eating sufficient amounts of wendigo flesh," Brian lectures as you use the devices set out before you- you have no idea why he would set up a surgical area that can be controlled from the next room over but yet here you are, precisely directing the dissecting instruments through carving apart the carcass.
"Muh. Don't put weird things into your mouth." Elena did take forever to learn not to glomp onto everything in sight back then.
Hey!
"Chuuh, exactly. Never forget that." See Elena, even Brian is trying to educate you.
"How infectious is it?" This is important information.
"Not too badly, chuh, it is mainly an issue in areas with little to no alternate food sources… Which happens to be where wendigos of all kinds thrive, chuuh."
"Muh." Elaboration would be appreciated.
"A wendigo is a cursed creature condemned for devouring the flesh of its own species, chuuh… Which is stupid and only applies to some classes of animal, but that's just how it is, chuh," Brian explains. "It is especially prevalent in humans that happen to be starving, but some take more cannibalism before they degrade visibly, chuh. Once it happens, though, they rapidly devolve into animalistic predators."
"Muuh. Interesting." You bet they could be used as magical biological weapons, too. All you'd need to do would be starving a few captives and make them eat each other, then corral the resulting wendigo towards whatever you want it to fight.
"Puchuh, creating them in captivity is harder, but not impossible," Brian comments. "Still, once a wendigo dies, it is common practice to destroy it as the curse spreads to those that consume its flesh. This was most likely an owl that did so, a pregnant female judging by these scans."
"Mm. No cash?" You would've hoped you could at least sell off the more useful bits.
"Chuuh, we will incinerate this once we're done with it, but there's a standing bounty for the elimination of confirmed wendigos… And creating them to cash in on it is more trouble that it's worth, puuh."
Curses.
Curses.
"Essence?" You bring up the other topic you wanted to find out more about.
"Puchuh, essences come in all sorts of forms showing what they are the essence of," Brian explains, walking in circles behind you while you work. "The most common and, indeed, the most flexible, are magical essences, as magic is a fundamental factor in their existence and creation. However, other kinds exist, such as the sticky essence you have found, chuh."
"Why sticky?" Why is that worthy of being an essence?
"Chuh, many monsters use adhesives and similar for various purposes. If you'd incinerated more spiders in the furnace, you may have found more of these earlier."
You are holding your hands over your ears already, however, for Brian has said the forbidden word.
Come on daddy, this is important.
You pout and lower them again.
"Generally, they are useful to create sticky things, chuh, as you might have guessed. If I may suggest, you could combine them with your bullets or use them to create traps, for example."
"Muh. An obvious thought." Note to self, try combining sticky essence with bullets later or maybe use them for traps. This revolutionary thought could only have stemmed from your genius brain.
That's right, because we're so smart! Elena agrees.
"And spinies?" You ask.
"Chuh, you should really look into hunting something again soon first," Brian obviously deflects, swishing his tail.
What were you doing again? Probably nothing important.
"Am I behind schedule?" You ask instead of pondering on the useless things in life.
"A little, chuh. It would be good if you got a quick kill soon-ish- I can make the wendigo count, but that only goes so far, puchuh, so go and do something productive."
"Muh."
'You there?'
'Jackie?' 'Am here'
'Good.'
You shall require Melanie's aid in locating more victi- more targ- more threats to valiantly fend off.
Yeah, that's better.
'Can we meet? Do you have any suspicious rumours to share?'
'Uh, sure. Kinda in the middle of smth, mind if I just txt'
'I shall endeavour to hold back my sadness at not seeing you.'
'Wait shit' 'Didnt wanna sound like tht'
'It is fine' 'We can just meet later.'
'If yu're sure'
You will never get over how young people text these days.
Anyway, Melanie goes ahead and writes you about what she has found out, true to form producing three more or less suspicious or unusual situations for you to look at. Once again the narrative rule of three is making no secret of how much it is interfering with your life.
How dare it. One day, you will make it suffer for this.
You know, I'd tell you to get over it already, but with everything we know it wouldn't surprise me if you found a way to do it, too.
Anyway, from what Melanie and, subsequently, yourself can work out, the three big problems presented to you can be narrowed down to their particular areas of influence. One is an abandoned farm some way out from the city, said to be haunted by some of the people living nearby- one of which just so happened to come by the music store she works at, being a regular when they visit the city at that.
Very convenient, that.
The next is some odd clogging in the sewers that's making some serious trouble for the city's maintenance workers. They've obviously tried to resolve it, but apparently there were some deaths due to 'toxic shock' that they got despite wearing hazmat suits at the time, something your informant-girlfriend picked up on when she saw a team pack up and move out above a gully they were resealing.
At least we know the general location thanks to her snooping.
Lastly, it would seem you aren't actually done with the university you went to last time around to demonstrate the superiority of the ice type; you took out the secret government facility housing the mad scientist, but the guy Melanie told you about, the creepy doctor that was moving unusual amounts of strange things around, is still there like before, according to what she heard.
You must've just… hit the wrong secret lab or something. You would be embarrassed, but you did find a target to hit either way, so you don't actually care all that much, only insofar as you have to return for a second tour of the campus.
And this time we should be a little more thorough.
'What are you doing that is so important, actually?' You remembered to ask before ending the conversation over messenger app.
'Jus meeting up with a couple friends aftr work' 'Would introduce you but awkward'
'Muh.'
Too bad. You would've loved to meet new people.
Rape new people, you mean.
It's not rape if they have hearts in their eyes. You don't know how you know this, but you do.
Well, with Melanie indisposed for the evening and some work to be done regardless, you may as well focus on getting it done. And speaking of getting things done…
Ugh… Why is it that there's always a sewer level? Is this another universal constant video games just try to warn us about?
Yes, yes, but golems, such as the ones you can create and have her pilot, do not have a sense of smell and are quite expendable. So even if they run into something dangerous down there they can't escape from, it's no great loss.
Creating a trio of them just in case regardless, you get going, acutely aware of the limited time window you have available in regards to your portal's opening times. Everyone moves out quickly, yourself choosing the right direction to fly into and proceeding to concentrate on your mission.
How hard can it be to find out about any irregularities on that stupid university campus?
As it turns out, not hard at all. Using your bird's eye perspective of the area, taking a few minutes to observe properly, you soon notice a small truck transporting some sort of fluid container to one of the buildings opposite of the one you infiltrated so as to find your way into the secret lab underneath.
It strikes you as odd because, when you squint a little, you can make out a faint glow of magic coming from the tank of whatever is being delivered; obviously enough, this is a big hint as to why you're here.
Looking closer, it seems this place is filled with actual lab spaces as evidenced by what little you can make out through various windows, making this building a very obvious base for an actual scientist that's supposed to be in this university as opposed to a fake pokemon trainer that doesn't know the difference between steel type and psychic type and was basically just renting space through a shady government agency.
Now perhaps getting inside whatever (most likely secret) lab there is to be found in this part of campus would be a lot more difficult… if it weren't for the truck you are following and inspecting as it goes.
The people apparently doing the delivery are being told what to do and put where by a shaky-looking dude in a lab coat wearing glasses. Notably, the vaguely magical fluid is being pumped into several smaller containers that are then laden onto carts and moved onward. That is, though you cannot follow the delivery all the way, you do spy, using your convenient angle from above, not only the back entrance being used, but also a wide freight elevator some way through a hallway beyond it that soon descends downwards.
Look at that. An easy way in. You have once again succeeded in everything. You wonder how Elena and her team of golems are doing on their end?
Elena sighed mentally, super unhappy with how this was going. Not so much because their bodies were going to be destroyed, but rather because she couldn't just kill the target with extreme prejudice by herself.
Once more a worm-like protuberance came shooting out of the wall and once again it was grasped and pulled out by one of her underlings. They were highly resistant to blunt force and even working together, they had a hard time cutting the things apart before they spewed acid literally everywhere. Worse, she was pretty sure they weren't really doing much damage, considering the size of the monster that she found when she came looking with her little team.
That was, entire walls made of bubbling flesh, pulsing veins drawn throughout it. The thing was well-camouflaged, the transition between it and the normal sewers flowing; its outlying pieces were colored like normal walls, sporting just the occasional uneven bit of 'stone', but the deeper in they went, the more obvious it became this thing was alive and had taken over a sizeable part of the city's underground structures.
The worms were either some kind of parasite or symbiote within it or else just a part of it, but either way they were making it extremely hard to really progress without being caught up in dozens of minor fights on the way.
She'd really need her daddy's firepower to get anywhere, at this rate.
Satisfied with the information you have received and the critical details now available to you for the future, you make your way back through your portal, intent on getting through before it closes.
You have a heist to plan. Or a mission, or a preemptive retaliatory strike. Alternatively you could call it an effort to preserve peace within your area of influence, too.
That's right. You're the US of A now, if anyone has a problem with that you can introduce them to your nuclear options.
Bring it, feds!
Daddy, please stop challenging Murphy's law. We already may or may not have one shady magical government agency after our head.
Your voice shall not be silenced! Freedom! Freedom for the Jackie Monarchy!
Still, your plans to declare independence and/or take over America (First this city, then this country, then… the world!) aside, you have a new target now. Or set of targets, rather, concentrating on the threats or issues- you aren't sure about the second secret lab you've found this week yet- actually within the city proper, as opposed to some country hick that probably summoned demons or magically mutated due to too much incest over the generations or something.
I'd love to argue, but from what we know about how magic works and taking into account the tropes of magical girl hentai, I wouldn't really be surprised.
It is reassuring to have an expert on the topic in the back of your head, then.
You bet I'm an expert, Elena agrees to the unspoken suggestion. Because you're subtle and shit. Cute little anime girls being railed by everything under the sun and beyond? Sign me right up.
… You wonder if, perhaps, you should have kept a closer eye on exactly what she did at home.
Nevertheless, you soon arrive at your abode, standing out against the surrounding copse of trees growing all over quickly decaying unused infrastructure in its intact-ness, whereupon you immediately go to locate Brian in his underground spacewarped research-themed dungeon.
Say what you will about the fake cat, but it does know how to set a mood.
"Chuuh?" He turns around when you find him in a room filled with screens presumably showing various happenings throughout the basement he's dug out.
"Aaargh! My leg! What's it done to my leg?!" It even has audio, too.
"Hold on Jerry, we can fix this, we can- ukh!"
"Fuck! There's more of them! Retreat! Retreat!"
Ignoring what sounds like a minor war zone, you pick up your Puchuu. "Planning time."
"Chuuh, it was just getting to the good part."
"Muh. Just record it for later."
You don't believe for a second Brian can't just do that.
"Muh. Laboratory, sewer monster," you sum up what you just finished explaining after you undid your transformation. "More info on the latter."
"Chuh, from what you've told me, it sounds like an advanced species of mimic," Brian says, sitting down on the desk you decided to use for the purposes of practical demonstration by way of creating little ice figurines of what you're talking about. "There are various subspecies, but this one could be categorized as a biological large-scale imitator."
Booh, where's my living treasure chests to beat up for treasure and exp in one?
"How to kill them?" You ask aloud.
"There are two possible ways, chuuh," your trusty monster lexicon says. "One, it has a core somewhere inside of its body, chuh. It would die once this core is destroyed, but not all mimics of this kind have one."
You tilt your head. "The other possibility?"
"Just destroy enough of it, chuh. Luckily, these two approaches can be combined given enough capacity for violence, puchuh."
Ah, indeed. No need to be overly worried about this, then.
Daddy, you have to ask for what defenses it might have or else you'll be surprised in the field for no reason, Elena demands unreasonably and with little to no cause. After all, what monster could possibly-
Daddy!
"Muh, what can it do to defend itself?"
"Chuuh, judging by the acid and worm appendages your scouts observed, it will have several internal mechanisms meant to both catch prey in the outer reaches of its body and push intruders out of the inner parts, puchuh," Brian elaborates, walking in a few small circles. "Watch out for acid pit traps and similar traps in general, chuh, this monster is its own environment and has evolved various strategies for making use of this fact."
"Muh." So in other words, just send in meatshields first, then come in and start blasting.
Not wrong.
"How about the lab?" You ask.
"Not much information, puchuh, but if you can find something vaguely threatening, I'll see if I can make it count for the purpose of bureaucracy, chuh." Brian halts for a moment, seemingly gazing off into the distance. "To think I would one day chuhck around with paperwork like this… How the mighty have fallen, puchuuh."
"Muh." You pat his head in solidarity.
You blink awake, your mind in turmoil as you once again prepare to realize your full potential upon this world, inflicting whatever part of your power you wish upon all that exi-
You got high off of a dozen bars of chocolate and stumbled around the house until I coaxed you onto the couch, Elena interrupts your well-reasoned inner monologue regarding how you shall end the world one day.
"Muh." That would explain the sweet taste in your mouth.
… You're hungry. How much of that ice cream you stole is left again?
Probably not enough. Anyway, what're we doing today?
Possibilities swirl through your mind, unending doors opening as you carefully consider all the paths stretching out before you and the destinations they lead towards.
"Muh. Let's go bother Olivia. Threat Detected. None shall escape."
The threat of boredom, that is.
Oh, sure. Let's go rape her a bit, not like she has any other character development possibilities open right now.
It's not rape as indicated by the heart-shaped pupils, as you might have mentioned at some point yesterday. Any lawyer would surely agree.
Flying at a leisurely pace, you shoot off messages in Olivia's direction, making sure she gets the incredible importance of what you're making her do and that she as well as her team (not friends, because as you've already covered Olivia doesn't have any) absolutely must jump at your command while you survey your domain, the grand city of Generica and all that it entails.
And yes, by the way, you actually did have some breakfast of strawberry ice cream. It was pretty tasty.
By the time you've arrived, Olivia and Kerrie are on their school's roof, awaiting your arrival like appropriately loyal subjects. However, it would seem that Bubbles has failed to show up, wich is why you decide to take a moment to hover in the air above the two of them.
Menacingly.
Menacingl- hey. Not funny.
Not my fault you're so predictable.
Grumbling internally, you finally descend like the deity you are, gracing the two magical girls on the building with your presence. "Is… everything okay, Jackie? You were kind of staring at nothing for a full minute there."
You glare at Olivia. "I wasn't."
"But-"
"Wasn't."
"Can we just get to why we're here already?" Kerrie interrupts your intense verbal bullying of your pet dog. "We don't have long until next period."
Well someone's a teacher's pet.
As if. If anything, they're all your own pets.
They're still suckers for actually going to school when they could just not.
No objections from you there. "Where's Bubbles?"
"She's probably still out cold at our base, she kind of lives there," Olivia shrugs, her green hair moving in the wind. "I sent her a text like you asked, but there's no telling when or if she'll-"
"Iiiiiiiit's Bubbles time!" Just then, a familiar, skimpily-dressed blonde bursts out the door onto the roof, bearing a big grin. "Guess what guys, I brought breakfast! Or, like, a buncha nutella crepes, but they count, right? Got these off a stall on the way."
She pulls out a tupperware box, unlatching it to reveal the promised food. Your stomach does not grumble at the sight, for you are well-fed and do not require the sustenance you tax off of your subjects.
"Gimme." You're still totally eating one.
You chew on the delicious treat as you discover new levels of Jackie-ness, biting into soft batter and letting warm, chocolate-adjacent taste spread through your mouth.
Truly, a meal fit for an empress.
You got some beside your mouth, daddy.
You try to look down, considering whether you can lick up the unseen bits of sustenance wherever it is adhering to your noble, regal and altogether masculine face.
"Aww, she's, like, kinda really cute, isn't she?"
Heresy.
No, she's right. You really are adorable.
Muh.
Olivia sighs at Bubbles' words, coming closer and taking a paper tissue out while leaving her own crepe. Alarmed, you take a step back, but she continues advancing. "Please don't encourage her, Bubs."
"Muh," you say aloud for her benefit.
However, it is of no use. You are assaulted by the soft brushing of her tissue to remove the chocolate(-adjacent) you were still going to eat, stolen from your mouth and removed from your person entirely.
Gripped by sadness, you are almost incapable of continuing your feeding. Almost.
Olivia sighs again.
"Can we… still get to why you called us?" Kerrie asks, making you expend massive amounts of energy to pay attention to what's going on and simultaneously eat.
It really is a conundrum, isn't it?
You aren't sure how long you can keep this up, so you shall have to be brief.
"Big monster under the city," you bring out in-between bites of what is technically a kind of sweet. "Make time in the evening."
Olivia freezes. "How big?"
"Very big. Stationary, though. It's in the sewers. Also is the sewers."
"Huh." Bubbles leans in, which looks quite ridiculous considering how far away she's sitting on the roof. "So it's big… because it's part of the sewers?"
"Muh," you nod. Bubbles gets it. "Lots of space to cover, so you'll help."
"Mhm." Kerrie cracks her neck, neatly finishing up the last bit of folded dough before continuing. "It'd be nice to test our teamwork against a different kind of monster. You promise it won't be too dangerous for us? Remember we're weaker than you."
"Muh." It is nice of her to acknowledge her place. "Killed and wounded normies, but you'll be fine if you're careful."
"Got it."
Meanwhile, you're having to fend off a fussy Olivia again, the… verdette? Is that the word?
As good as anything else to describe green hair.
She's still continually trying to wipe your mouth. How exceedingly bothersome.
Finally, the approach of the bell drives the two magical girls that pretend they have a life down into the rest of the school again, leaving only yourself and Bubbles standing on it. You do wonder why she's still around, but also do not care all that much.
Instead you stare at her while thinking about what else you still need to do today and how much time you have before your portal closes.
"Hey Jackie, I, like, had a question." Until Bubbles speaks up, that is. "Not try'na be pushy here, but you like girls, right?"
"Muh?" You ask.
"'Cuz you have, like, something going with Ollie and I've seen the way you look at everyone, yannow?"
Shit, she's onto us! Quick, daddy, rape her!
You are much more subtle and nuanced than that. Just you watch, Elena, for you, the Jackie, shall solve this issue through careful thought and discussion like a proper adult.
"What of it?"
"Yeah, like, what of it, right? Buuut, 'nother question." You get the feeling it is going to be a leading question, but okay. "Do you have, like, boy parts?"
"Muh?!" How does she know?
Daddy…
"Knew it. 'Cause if you do… I got another couple crepes here if you lemme play with iiit," Bubbles offers in a sing-song voice, showcasing more delicious, delicious treats in a separate container she takes out of her handbag.
"Muuuh…" You like crepes…
Daddy, you're terrible at this.
"Muh." Jackie made her usual sound, eyeing the offered sweets bought for a couple bucks each with obvious greed. Bubbles decided to wave the box in the air, seeing the girl's gaze following them like a laser-guided missile.
Hook, line and sinker. "So? Deal or no deal?"
"Muh. Mumumumuh." Normally Bubbles went for guys, given the presence of big fat cock hammering into her was great, but she kinda wanted to find out what exactly was going on in Jackie's panties. Also, her being so cute did help.
"Here, I'll, like, give you all of them." She could hardly track the speed with which Jackie snatched the tupperware box out of her hand, though the white-haired girl carefully closing her eyes in enjoyment as she kept on eating confirmed what happened.
That was a yes then.
Jackie was just standing there, so Bubbles knelt down in front of the younger girl and reached under her dress, pulling the green not-quite-fabric (but close enough to count in some ways) of her panties down.
Immediately, a heavy musk hit Bubbles' nostrils as the perhaps biggest cock she'd ever seen sprung out, nearly hitting her in the face. "Oh… That, like, pretty big."
"Muh," Jackie made pridefully. Just like a guy would be, actually.
The cock in question was… big, comically big on a small girl like Jackie, with lots of, like, ribbing in a deeper color along its length and lots of patterns of more raised skin looking kind of like, like, frost and stuff.
It also had, like, a fleshy, hardening knot at the base? "Muuuh," Jackie moaned when Bubbles started kneading it.
Also, a pair of big balls was hanging under it. Oh, this was gonna be fun.
Jackie was already getting hard, so Bubbles leaned in to lick the mostly human (but still ribbed) head of her cock, making the girl make cute squeaking sounds that only got better when she used both hands to jerk her rod.
It was weird to do this to a girl, but Bubbles loved weird.
She opened her mouth wide and, after a bit of adjusting, took the tip into it, sucking and licking the girthy cock she had her hands on and fondling the balls with one hand on the side, just playing with them a little.
"Mmuh." Jackie's tongue was poking out of the corner of her mouth when Bubbles looked up to confirm. She just made too many cute expressions!
Using years of experience in handling cocks, she pushed forwards, letting the inhuman penis slide deeper into her mouth and, with a quick breath, beyond, spreading her throat around the big fat virile specimen she managed to find.
Hey, so what if Bubbles had a thing for this. She'd been doing pretty much the same ever since she was little, who was gonna tell her not to?
Deeper and deeper she went, throating Jackie's cock. A pair of powerless hands had landed on Bubbles' head, too, just staying there while their owner gasped and moaned. "D-dake it allll…"
Even her voice was squeaky and pleading, regardless of how much cock the girl had on her.
Not that Bubbles wasn't going to do just as she was asked. Her tongue was poking out of her mouth and past her lips spread around cockflesh, sliding over every rib of the magnificent rod presented to her as she took it as deep down as she could until it had to be, like, punching through her esophagus, that's what it felt like.
Then Bubbles swallowed properly, every muscle in her throat flexing and milking Jackie at once, her upper body bobbing back and forth to accommodate the motion along Jackie's dick.
"Muh, Hah, muh, hah, gonna, gonna knock up your belly… G'na feed you for days…"
Amen, Jackie.
It didn't take long until the girl came, a steady push down Bubbles' gullet letting her know she was depositing lots of her baby batter in her stomach. Except Jackie didn't stop coming, her twitching cock spewing more and more of the stuff.
A little worried, Bubbles backpedaled to even get it back out and also breathe again. She hadn't needed to breathe as much ever since joining the snake crew, but she still needed some if she held her breath a while and she also wanted to actually taste this stuff, see if it was any different from normal cum.
And it was. Jackie groaned in disappointment at losing out on her tight throat fuckhole, but Bubbles proceeded to pump her cock with both hands to suckle out more cum still, the girl's load only slowly ebbing down to something manageable after a few moments.
"Paind you whide… Margh you wifh my cuuuhm…"
Jackie's cum was, actually, tasty. Just pretty nice to drink, savory, a bit thick. Bubbles made sure to get all of it out, a few streams running out of the corners of her mouth and down her chin, but she got most of it inside of her where it belonged.
Then she, finally, pulled herself off of Jackie's cock entirely. "Still hard? Ready for, like, round two?" She grinned.
"Mugubh." Jackie was as eloquent as ever.
Bubbles arched her back, looking backwards to where Jackie was eyeing up her butt. Everyone did when she got down on all fours, so she wasn't surprised or anything.
"C'mon, I wanna-" She was pulling her panties to the side, they were thin enough not to hide much anyway, but Jackie was already on her, dropping to her knees behind Bubbles to grab at her hips with her small, cool hands.
Then she rammed her cock right right her, spreading the older magical girl open wide to accommodate her girth. "-aggghh! Ooh, that's a biiig cock."
"M-muh." Jackie was already weakening, though she did keep on driving her cock into Bubbles just fine so she didn't care.
The only thing she cared about was getting Jackie's cock into herself as deep as she could take it, so she pushed back in time with her thrusts, feeling it moving into herself hard and fast once both of them found a rhythm. "Yeah, just like that! Fuck me, Jackie!"
"Gnh! Gonna fugg you… Shtupid!" It was almost endearing how the little girl grit her teeth and sawed into Bubbles, which made for an interesting mix. Then Jackie laid herself over her, hands coming around to grope her breasts, which was just even cuter.
And better, because now she was concentrating on pistoning into her properly.
"Aww, you like them?" Bubbles asked, conjuring a little bit of cloth to protect her knees from the rough concrete they were being shoved again. "They won't give you any milk, though."
"Gotta… fiiix that!" Oh, how cute! Adorable! Oh, and Jackie was hitting her womb, knocking the air out of Bubbles' lungs now.
She grunted, shaking her butt against the girl's crotch. She was feeling nice and full, just how she liked it… So next she started flexing, knowing from experience how it felt for dicks buried inside her to be constricted and milked hard.
"Mguuuh!" Jackie made more cute sounds, holding out and getting back to fucking Bubbles, but she knew her time was short. The blonde licked her lips, receiving every push that felt like it had to be going halfway through her body with anticipation.
"Yeah, c'mon, like that, c'mon!" She could feel it coming, the white-haired magical girl shivering and twitching inside of her, driving her closer and closer and making her tip kiss Bubbles' baby chamber faster and faster. "Cum inside of me! Do it! Do it do it do iiit!"
"Mugyaaah!" Letting out her warbled little cry, Jackie came, with enough force she had to hold on for dear life. Just then, Bubbles could feel something push against her entrance, forced open as it was, and she soon recognized it as the feeling of a knot forcing her even wider.
She grunted and moaned, knowing what Jackie was doing. Holding herself in place, she felt it slide in deeper and deeper, swelling up and sealing her pussy tight.
Then Jackie came in earnest, shooting off a serious blast inside of Bubbles' cunt, so she grit her teeth and rode out her own happy funtime special… Only Jackie kept coming, making her gasp and keeping her head in that fluffy space where she didn't think because it was flooded with pleasure.
"Sooo goooood…" She had to force herself to stay upright, mounted and knotted by Jackie like a bitch in heat.
Jackie didn't, or couldn't or whatever, slumping down bonelessly and ineffectually twitching and rutting in place, just as unable to pull out as Bubbles was to get her to. More and more of her weirdly tasty cum came, pumped into Bubbles so much she though it might come out her ears soon.
She panted. They both did. Bubbles looked down under her, watching where her spread legs were swallowing up the meaty rod driving her nuts and her belly was forced to accommodate everything Jackie was putting out.
She groaned, a gloved hand feeling what she was sure was happening; her toned belly was bulging just a little, too much semen making her bloat along with Jackie's cock.
They stayed like that for a long while, her stomach filled with more and more cum. Jackie was still enough she wondered if she might have fallen asleep, but no- she stirred again after a bit, weakly moving around.
Then Bubbles knew what she was doing, white hair falling to brush over her back. Jackie was getting back to eating crepes.
"Like, you got the priorities, amirite?"
"Mhm. Tasty." The hand groping Bubbles' butt made it unclear what she mentt, but she was fine with it either way.
"Hey, so, like, next time you gotta fuck my butt, yeah? I'll bring sweets again, too." She wasn't usually on this side of things, but buying sex with treats was totally fine with her.
"Muh. Buttsex is good."
"Glad we can, y'know, agree."
Man, it had been ages since Bubbles had been knotted like this. Good times, 'specially because Jackie was staying still instead of tugging on it.
Long as she was munching on something, anyway.
Having victoriously asserted your dominance over Bubbles by fucking her into a drooling mess, you return to your portal just a few minutes before it shall close up until the evening with a full belly and without the edge of the level of constant arousal you're usually on.
You sure showed her, daddy.
Even Elena's spirits are lifted in the wake of your utter and complete sexual conquest of domination.
Next off, however, you will be requiring the aid of your golems in the battle coming this evening, hence you shall spare no effort in making them look good and also less likely to break at the most inopportune of times.
Also make more bombs. Confined spaces like the sewers demand it.
… And you shall also make a few more rune bombs, you guess. If you can squeeze them into your busy schedule.
"Are you going after the mimic already, chuh?"
"Muh."
"Make sure not to overexert yourself, chuuh. If things look problematic, just kill yourself."
"Muh?"
"Puchuuh, you can come back from the dead, so it's no big problem in the long term. What's more, chuh, any heat or flak you would have been getting on me would be nullified because I'd need to go look into finding a new girl anyway, chuuh."
"Muh."
"Chuh, do whatever you want. As long as you do your part, I'm satisfied."
"Whatever."
You may need to work on your one-liners, but you feel you have a handle of the whole 'giving pithy comments' track. Finally, you are finding back to your true greatness!
Eh, you have a way to go, daddy. Used to be you'd continually crack wise-ass jokes at people while you murdered them.
… Back to your true greatness!
Now you'll need to go make a few preparations before you meet the meatshield trio. Nothing much, just a few props you want to get your hands on ahead of time.
"You came. Good." You are sitting there with your arms and legs crossed, floating on your platform of ice and holding court reigning over the lesser mortal worms beneath yourself.
"Jackie, could you please get off the bus stop? I don't want to hurt my neck." Olivia's request is met with the scorn it deserves, but as you are a merciful ruler you shall comply with it, descending to merely above the heads of everyone present.
Olivia, Bubbles and Kerrie, your three magical girl minions for this evening. All three arrived already transformed, having ridden the bus to the destination you demanded they come to. Good doggies, coming the moment you whistle.
"Okay, so… we're here," Kerrie says, scrunching up her nose. "You said the monster was in the sewers, right? How are we going to get inside?"
"Follow." You wave for the team to come after you with their feet on the ground, actually walking like awful little pedestrians. Plebeians, the lot of them.
You know, literally being above the common man more often than not isn't bad at all.
Yes, yes. Being yourself is awesome indeed.
On a related note, Bubbles seems to be uncharacteristically quiet and content, just floundering along as part of the group and giving you a wink when you look at her. Olivia seems to sense something is amiss and squints, looking between the two of you, but before you can resolve this situation through forcefully making her suck you off, you arrive at the entrance you have prepared.
Or, as Kerrie puts it… "What."
You turn to look in front of yourself, nodding in satisfaction. Elena did good work, the way nobody not at least technically part of yourself is capable of.
The middle of the street is blocked off by these portable barriers your golems stole appropriated from a nearby construction site, the gully in the center of things currently open as the two of your magically animated minions you sent out to prepare your entry point await your arrival wearing yellow hard hats and construction worker vests they shifted their heads and shoulders to fit.
"Muh. Good work." The golem controlled by Elena directly gives you a nod, her compatriot still standing there with its arms crossed looking for all the world like a bored worker waiting for the colleagues with the equipment to come by.
"… Jackie, what is all of this? What are-"
Olivia's mouth isn't for talking. "Entryway. Also, exfiltration point after we're done. It isn't far from here. Now go."
Kerrie stirs. "Wait, shouldn't be discuss strategy or at least determine roles before-"
Maybe if you had the patience to. "Go in, kill big monster, get out. Don't fuck up so you don't die," you explain the brief version. "Now get."
"But-"
"Get."
You can be very persuasive if you have to be.
Just like the old times, daddy. Back then you used more words, but you always had a silver tongue.
Muh muh.
The climb into the sewers is stinky and claustrophobic. Mostly because one, it's the sewers and your finely attuned senses are immediately assaulted by the subtle stink of feces and two you have to actually, augh, climb down the ladder of bent iron bars like a normal person, the tunnels and underground structures you will be moving through simply too confined for you to maneuver of your flying ice platforms.
Still you stick with it, for though you loathe the circumstances, there's a monster to be fought and defeated and, consequently, loot to be had, as surely as you're a magical girl.
Sewer stages suck, but this one better had something worth the trouble. If not, we can always just freeze them over and keep any citizen above us from accessing water once we're done.
You like that idea. It is very pleasing to you.
"Phew! I'd like to say this is, like, a new low even for me, but I've been to a few alleys that stunk worse." And that, Bubbles, is why you leave killing hobos to Brian instead of doing it personally.
"It's definitely an acquired taste. Or tolerance, rather."
At Kerrie's words Olivia tilts her head, then blinks and nods, arriving at the bottom of the ladder and joining the rest of you. "Oh, I see. i didn't even notice. Give me a second…"
Her tongue peeks out of the corner of her mouth as the greenette concentrates, then all of a sudden a fresh wind brushes past your group, wiping away the stink and letting you breathe easier.
… I can't be… Olivia is… Actually useful…
I mean, she's wind, right? Or air, rather. It's not super surprising.
"There, I should be able to keep this up without any strain. Unless the stench gets worse, I can keep us all refreshed!"
… Just this once, you pat Olivia's head. Or you would, if reaching it wasn't so much of a bother. Oh, wait.
You turn to Bubbles. "Lift me up."
"Really? Like, sure, why not I guess." She does as you command, lifting you up by your armpits, therefore allowing you to lavish the praise you did not think necessary on this occasion onto your minion in green.
"Uhm… Thanks?"
Kerrie just looks on, clearly impatient but also determined to wait until the whole team is ready. Good on her.
Traveling through the sewage pipes is a tense and serious affair, the dawning realization of a battle over life or death bringing a somber and self-reflective mood to wash over the group.
"You're, like, super light and cuddly, Jackie! And in the summer you're totes awesome to cuddle because you cool stuff down!"
Somber and self-reflective!
"Why're you being so touchy-feely with Jackie, Bubbles?"
You wouldn't know self-reflection if it hit you in the face, daddy, and I say this as someone that's genuinely on your side.
"Muh."
"See? She doesn't like it, either!"
"You're just, like, totes jelly."
Up front, Kerrie sighs, looking over her shoulder. "Look, I get this is a deeply personal topic between you guys, but can we talk this out after we're done here? Once we aren't in the sewers with a giant monster?"
"Not with Bubbles molesting Jackie!"
You like where she's touching you, though you do agree you should probably pay attention to your surroundings right now.
Heresy.
No, you're actually serious.
"Oh c'mon, Jackie don't mind, right?"
"Muh," you repeat yourself, pointing at the wall ahead again with a bit more insistence this time. "There's a trap."
Trap Detection automatic success due to Awareness Third Eye!
Kerrie whirls around, drawing her sword. "Where?!"
Nothing happens. Because she hasn't triggered it yet.
"Muh…" Mildly annoyed, but figuring you can spare the mana, you hold out a hand to fire an ice lance from, driving the sharp piece of ice into the wall. Said wall twitches, making a gurgling sound as deep, red blood comes bubbling out of it. "Found it already."
"Oh…"
Concentrating, you call upon your inner magic, channeling it into that which you require at this time; protection, no matter how slight, and your trusty minions, thirsting for crime as they may.
"Golem Gang, assemble!"
A flash comes about, your costume changing suit to depict your rising power levels and your golems rising from the ground, ice unfolding into their full forms each. Only five for now, to avoid putting too much stress on your magic circuit-
Daddy, no. We will not go there. That is the domain of shitty Japanese light novel adaptations and Harry Potter fanfiction that shall be struck from humanity's collective memory one day.
… Oh, alright.
Bubbles gasps, holding you up so you duck your head to avoid bumping it against the ceiling just in case. "Jackie, like, you can totes transform! While transformed! You have stages!"
"Muh. This isn't even my final form," you announce proudly.
"Okay, thought as much after the ones from earlier. So we're fighting a monster that's… part of the walls?" Kerrie asks, all professional and down to the point.
"It replaced parts of the sewers with itself. Walls, floors, ceilings," you list off, figuring you may as well invest your daily word budget now when it counts. "Watch for traps and for worms coming from every angle."
"… Wow, this has to be the most words you've spoken at once in the entire time we've known you." You do not appreciate the sass, Kerrie!
"You gotta earn it. You haven't." Your judgement is as swift as it is merciless. "Let the golems go first to trip any traps on the way."
"The way to where?" Olivia asks.
You shrug. "Somewhere. Worst case we just rampage until it dies. Or the city crumbles above us. One of the two."
Trawling onward, you soon notice a few patterns you quickly make use of. First, you're on the right track, noticing as much through both your Third Eye and the fact the surroundings keep on morphing slowly, but steadily.
It's subtle enough to be comparable to the boiling water effect, named after its most demonstrable instance of watching water in a pot slowly grow hotter and hotter until it begins to boil all the while nobody is capable of consciously noticing the procedural changes taking place until it does, indeed, boil.
It is probably magical, like the veil, come to think of it.
Pretty sure that's just human psychology, daddy.
But you shan't be fooled!
"Muh. Veins," you point out, the girls (and Elena possessing one of your golems) looking closer. The faint red lines visible between bricks are an obvious tell, if nothing else.
"Creepy," Bubbles says, holding you tighter. "Is there-"
"Worm."
A single brick in the wall is shoved aside as a segmented, meaty limb ending in an almost humanlike mouth framed by two larger mandibles emerges, seeking to murder a golem. However, Olivia acts faster, swinging one of her spears with a yell. "Haa!"
A blade of wind bisects it, the creepy-crawly severed to land on the ground.
"That was easy. Guess it's just outside defenses-"
"Behind." Why is everyone that is not you so blind?
This time Kerrie steps in, unsheathing her katana (edgy weeb central welcome) in a flash of heat. This worm, too, is cut in twain, incidentally also cauterized by the magic she seems to be using.
The wall is actually twitching in pain at it.
"Huh. It doesn't like fire, does it?" Kerrie grins, returning her weapon to its sheathe.
"Don't use up all your mana already," Olivia warns, receiving a nod in exchange.
"I know. Still good to know for later."
You are quietly flabbergasted. How come both of them are suddenly something approaching to not completely incompetent?
There, there.
"Muh. Onward. Follow my directions."
Thanks to your infinitely wise and profound guidance, you can advance with minimal danger, noticing traps and ambush spots almost before they happen. As you go deeper and the environment shifts more and more towards being obviously unnatural, fleshy walls increasingly openly red and made of meat and an almost pulsing heartbeat dominating the area, you discover more and more traps; the worms, yes, but also smashing flesh-walls ready and waiting to crush any that dare to pass between them, pitfalls of red acid almost looking like lava or the like, tripwires made of sinew grown from the ground and snapping great jaws shut over any that trigger them- it is surprising just how many 'natural' defenses this Giant Mimic has.
Nevertheless, using the several perspectives granted to you by possessing a golem's senses while Bubbles carries you and no small amount of care, you make great strides in drawing closer and closer to the central location at the heart of this beast. Less and less true walls are around, largely merely serving as carapace for this thing and looking mildly melted with few sharp corners left anywhere.
You also find several large, important-looking veins or vein analogies, where some kind of probably important liquid is carried along throughout this monster's body. You take great joy in having Elena, Olivia and Kerrie cut those open at every turn, to amusing pain-filled sounds and shifting from the 'sewers' around you.
Finally, you find an opening, a glaring hole in a wall to be accessed inside a small maintenance room that hasn't seen its regular inspection for some time.
"This is getting really like DOOM, yannow? Not, like, sure we should go in there dicks first," Bubbles says when she beholds the short tunnel that has nothing to do with any original layout anymore.
"It's the only way forward, apparently, and we need to confront and kill this thing sooner rather than later," Kerrie argues, hand on her sword's grip.
"I just want to get out of the sewers already. Even without the stink, all of this walking is just plain boring."
"Muh." You have to agree with Olivia and you aren't even walking yourself.
Oh come on, where's your sense of adventure, daddy? Even if this is the infamous sewers stage.
Elena proceeds forwards, using her disposable body to take the risks you don't want to. Truly, she is the bravest among you all.
… Oh, come along. It's nothing worrisome at all.
… Is she getting eaten yet?
No, I'm hiding. Duh.
There is nothing in for it, you suppose. "Muh. Forward, my trusty steed."
"Alright, alright, jeez."
The tunnel is short and without any traps, leading to yet another hole-like opening. Everything around you is pulsing now, steadily moving in an unfaltering rhythm.
Then you come face to face with the monster, it having awaited you already. You can tell from its expression.
"Muh. Halt, evildoer."
It groans and shrieks, dozens of mouths chewing at the air.
"… I think I might be sick," Olivia says. Weak. It isn't even a bug.
No point in dawdling, now, when instead you could be acting. Forcing your oldest and perhaps trustiest spell into existence, you fire off a shockwave of cold, pushing into and against the large wall of flesh standing against you.
"Muh. Kill." In battle, orders have to be succinct and easy to understand.
Elena salutes you with your sword partially integrated into one of her hands, leading the charge of your golems. The trio of magical girls you brought along to assist you exchanges a glance- and they, too, ready themselves, Bubble setting you down behind the front line of this battle.
Where you belong. Fighting in melee is for serfs and summoned minions.
Wizard supremacy is rooted in wizard superiority. Accept no other class.
Everyone attacks, at once. Your golems throw themselves at bubbling flesh, sharpened fingers and sword-arms carving into it as it keeps on regenerating in equal measure. Elena, ever a brave champion of Jackiekind, jumps over the clamor of the rest of the battle, ramming your sword into an eye of the wall-like abomination and making it screech unpleasantly.
However, its flesh regenerates just as rapidly as it is damaged while it has many more eyes, though you note with satisfaction that the gaping hole through which off-red ichor and pus flow out of the ruined one isn't healing.
Already you have discovered a weakness.
"Yaah!" Olivia screams, firing off a piercing air projectile with a corkscrew thrust of her spears. It misses another eye, but blows a momentary hole into the shapeshifting flesh under it anyway, opening the way for Bubbles to jump in and punch it in a carefully aimed uppercut that makes the whole organ burst open, covering her from head to toe.
"Ewwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!!!!"
"We already know it doesn't like fire, so how about this?!" Kerrie draws her weapon in a smooth stroke again, drawing a thin line of fire in the air that spreads toward your opponent, exploding once it hits.
What even is that? How does that work?
It's magic, daddy.
Yes, but it's fire! It isn't allowed to be cooler than ice!
Then, just as you begin targeting the vulnerable, soft eyeballs and deciding what spell to use against them, the entire mimic heaves, trembles running up and down its body as all of its mouth open as wide as they can at once.
Then they disgorge more of the red acid, entire streams of it absolutely flooding the entire chamber and turning into a downright wave of the stuff!
Luckily, you are prepared, quickly advancing in the opposite direction to avoid this unpleasant mimic vomit. You are joined in your mad dash by Olivia, who is jumping using her magic to support herself, and Kerrie, who was at some distance and began running like a coward the moment she realized what's happening.
Bubbles tries, but she's swallowed by the acid regardless. Elena, though, is having her golem launched out of the central chamber by the other ones, which them layer themselves over Bubbles and each other protectively.
A short mad dash ensues as you return through the short tunnel and to the maintenance room, quickly arriving in the rest of the overtaken sewer system again.
"Shit! Shit! Shit!" Kerrie seems quite distressed for some reason. "Did Bubbles make it?"
Olivia looks at the wall beyond which unspeakable vomit lurks. "… It was a noble sacrifice. We will never forget her."
"Muh."
Then the wall breaks apart, the central fleshy core of the mimic following after you and rearranging its insides for more space to move it while its fluids disperse in the surroundings. Your golems, ever trusty despite their gang affiliations, hold up a coughing and hacking Bubbles that is entirely naked and looks like she wishes she was dead.
"Ueeegh!"
She's really not catching any breaks here.
"This is, like, horrible," Bubbles complained, still crying after the experience she went through. Not that Kerrie didn't feel for her. "Everything totes stings, my eyes toterer sting, I got vomit everywhere!"
"Muh."
Jackie's disdainful exclamation was followed by the short, white-haired girl that was still looking weirdly unruffled by the horrific foe they were fighting raising her guns, the same ones Kerrie remembered being pointed at her face that one time she'd tried to argue with Jackie.
While out of costume.
A great white swirl of power manifested itself, the powerful weapons charging up for a brief moment before massive chunks of ice came shooting out of the muzzles, blasting through the air loudly and piercing right into three of the 'mimic's' eyes, penetrating the globes deeply and staying stuck in the flesh behind them.
A cold shudder went down Kerrie's back. Appropriate, given the ice involved.
"Distract," Jackie ordered. It took her a moment to figure out what they were meant to do, but the smallest among them proceeded to take out the metallic box she was carrying everywhere, pulling something out of it while Kerrie thought rapidly.
Grasping her sword with both hands, she looked at where the mimic was wounded and where it was not. "Olivia, Bubbles, you good?"
"I'm good to go!"
"Urgh… I want my revenge…"
She nodded. Good enough.
"Fuel me!" Trusting in Olivia to get what she meant, just as they'd practiced, Kerrie executed a long, exaggerated vertical swing, pumping as much mana into her weapon as she could spare. Her teammate vindicated her trust, adding concentrated air to her own magic, letting them both reach an extent of power neither would be able to alone.
Swathes of flame were propelled from Kerrie's slash, a wave of fire impacting the enemy and burning its volatile flesh. It shrieked, deeply aggrieved, while Bubbles stood ready to defend just like she was supposed to.
This. This was teamwork.
"Muh. Muh muh." Jackie made her sounds, handing out what looked like rocks to the icy golems around her. Three of the five took two of them each, the stone becoming part of their hand somehow, and it was only then that Kerrie realized there were faint traces of lines running along them shining in the little light they had.
"Allahu Akbar." She blinked. Why was Jackie-
The figures of ice charged headlong into the enemy, throwing themselves into the mouths hanging open all over the giant nightmare of flesh, tucking and rolling as they were chewed up by grisly rows of teeth.
Then the mimic exploded.
No, seriously, the shockwave was bursting out from inside of it, everywhere the suicide bombing golems had thrown themselves, and loud and imposing enough she thought her eardrums might burst for a moment. When the wildly spurting bodily fluids settled, she beheld the ruins of the monster's main body, jagged, twitching muscle the only thing left of it.
"Is… Is it dead?"
No sooner did she ask the question that she regretted it, everything around them coming alive at once. The mimic was far from dead- if anything, it looked like it was angry now.
Kerrie yelped as Olivia pushed into her, both of them barely evading a large maw emerging from the ground under them. Bubbles punched away a couple of the worm-like tentacles they were already familiar with, creating a small island of calm once Kerrie added a torrent of flame around them warding the shapeshifting monster off.
Jackie wasn't so lucky, being entangled in several of the long, stringy limbs that latched onto her from all directions. "Muh."
However, it seemed Jackie wasn't done yet. A wave of cold air came washing over them, the younger girl evidently not amused. "Muh. MuhmuhmuhMUHMUHMUUUUUH!"
Another series of sharp and pointy pieces of ice easily the size of a person came flying out, conjured purely through her magic this time and impacting the wall of frothing flesh at random, freezing everything around the wounds they were punching into it and sending the creature recoiling in pain, its garbling cry echoing inside Kerrie's ears.
"Grururururuah!"
Then, as though from nowhere, the one icy humanoid from earlier wielding the richly decorated sword appeared from behind them, rushing right through a desperate attempt to ward it off with a dozen more worm-tongues, slashing at them left and right as it advanced through the encirclement of everything around them all.
"Gotcha," Jackie muttered. It was so quiet Kerrie thought she might have misheard her for a moment.
Then the golem reached the mimic's core body or however this worked, ejecting the blade inside of its arm to wield it properly with its kludgy hand. It stabbed one particular eye, but it kept going from there, pushing deeper and deeper until it hit… something.
The creature stilled. Then the golem came back out, dragging what looked like a brain mixed with a heart behind it.
It was also the size of half a person.
"Muh. Victory."
"What was that 'muhmuhmuh' stuff back there? Were you, like, channeling the power of the ancients or what?" Bubbles asked, naked, exhausted, but grinning again already.
"Muh. You stink. Go away."
"Heh. Serves you right," Olivia said.
"What, like, was that, huh? I didn't, like, hear you."
Kerrie sighed. "Good work, team," she interrupted the brewing hours-long argument. "And thanks for killing this thing, Jackie. I'm sure none of us would've made it out if it weren't for you."
They also wouldn't have gone down into the sewers, but then the mimic would've just kept growing, so that thought was leading nowhere.
"Muh." Jackie raised her nose a little.
It was kind of cute. May also be a sign of pride? Kerrie would need to keep the expression in mind for later, this was like deciphering a whole book written in code.
Finally, Kerrie knows her place. Beneath the heel of your iron fist. No, your steel fist! Your… Your ice fist of domination!
"Muh." Haaaahahahahahahaha!
QM: posts an update
QM: Can I say how much it bothers me these messages aren't capitalized, by the way?
-Guess we're gonna follow Jackie like a puppy now
-Olivia is a puppy
-didn't you see the dream sequences
-Why does it look like Jackie is stealing the loot?
QM: Because she is
QM: And there's nothing you can do about it because you don't even know what it is IC
-That's bullshit
QM: And I have a banhammer
-… Why does the 'sudden absence of the city's sounds' sound bad?
-Because it is
-Welcome to our new pocket dimension prison
-literal pocket pussy
-It fits
-We're a fleshlight at minimum
QM: posts an update
-Holy hell
-tfw the last boss feeds you ice cream
-Olivia needs it
-she needs all the ice cream
-OH FUCK WE'RE PREGNANT
-How does that surprise you
-OH FUCK THERE'S A HOT PLANT CAT LADY
QM: She's much stronger than Jackie right now
QM: The only reason she doesn't forcefully turn you into an animal breeder is that Jackie has a claim on your already
-Viridis hot
-Why aren't we allowed inside the basement?
-bet Snaketail's in there
QM: One way to find out
-No thanks
QM: Don't worry, Jackie would find you in a week or two. Maybe she'd even reverse the damage.
-Can we talk about how she has a fireplace filled with screaming souls
QM: Guess what she did with the Fogrunner
QM: posts an update
-fml
-Jackie is terrifying
-She's always been
-Guys, I really don't think we should stay the night#
-Since when do we have a choice?
-Just saying guys but the anti-debuff thing really needs more training AP
-we'll get to it
-Until then enjoy the Jackie
-You guys suck
QM: Oh yeah, I renamed the anons to be 'Jackie Baby'
-fuck you
QM: Banned
This interlude was brought to you by NegaQuest Productions, Olivia Edition
Olivia breathed in deeply and rapidly, her rhythm hitching when Jackie moved inside her ass.
It was still hard to sleep with something that big, and hard, and pulsing buried so deep somewhere it wasn't supposed to be going, but she could take it, totally! As long as she was transformed. Jackie was usually a pretty still sleeper outside of those episodes when she got active, pushing against Olivia and climbing on top of her and forcing her to sleep on her stomach because she sure wasn't getting the giant erection out of her trembling guts, but it was okay!
She'd just… needed to get used to the penetration. Again. Jeez, but Jackie was huge for such a cute little girl.
She was getting a little loopy. Might be a lack of oxygen because the small body on top of her was pressing the air out of her lungs, but that was okay! She was supposed to go to sleep anyway!
… Inside the quiet that was gripping everything around her. Olivia was used to the city, to the background noise that was always there and you just didn't pay attention to, but this place, wherever it was, wasn't like that at all.
There weren't any cars or buses driving by nearby, no people in neighboring houses going about their day, no annoying asshole that had to wander around whistling to himself loud enough she could hear them through her closed window.
Just the creaking of wood every now and then from outside. Most of the time not even that. It was too quiet and-
"Muhhhh… guuuh… guuuh…"
And Jackie was softly snoring where she was lying on Olivia's back, a bit of cool saliva spreading on her shoulder. Not as much as her cheeks were being spread, though!
Ba-dum-tiss.
Now Olivia couldn't stop thinking about it. About what the freaky naked cat lady with the leafy tail had said.
That she was pregnant. With Jackie's child.
She was gonna be a mom oh god no what-
Pregnancies, she thought with the part of her mind not descending into incoherent jabbering, were a lot like car accidents or the death of a loved one. You knew they happened, intellectually, but you never thought they might happen to you.
Until they did.
So she would be… having Jackie's child? Unless she… aborted? Something inside her twisted, but she had to consider the facts and how she…
She couldn't be a good mom. Not between school and hiding it from her parents and being a Magical Girl and-
Jackie grabbed her with both hands. "Mine… guguhh… Bad doggie…"
… Jackie was less in any position to be a good dad, but would she agree? She probably wouldn't, the younger girl was stubborn and insistent like that.
Olivia gasped as another nudge and some grinding had Jackie's penis rub inside of her. This was really distracting-
Where were they anyway? No place should be this quiet. Olivia had seen trees through the windows earlier once she could stop glancing at the fireplace she could see tortured faces inside of, so maybe they were inside the forest somewhere east of the city?
She needed to… To talk to someone, probably. She couldn't deal with this stuff. It was too much.
Maybe she could ask the others… make Jackie pay alimony or… Or maybe just find a magical way to solve all her problems at once…
That would be nice… She needed to find Snaketail…
It was such, with a head heavy with swirling thoughts and a body heavy with a babbling, snoring Jackie, that Olivia fell into an unsteady, troubled sleep.
Olivia's butt was getting cold and she wondered if, perhaps, she would be allowed to remove the silly blindfold soon. The piece of cloth tied around her head was a little itchy.
It didn't help she could hear Jackie typing on her phone as the wind pushed through her hair. Why did she have to-
All of a sudden, they went lower and Olivia stopped hearing the city around them. "Jackie?"
"Muh?"
Good, she was still there. "Nothing, just asking."
"Muh."
Maybe this wouldn't be too bad? Jackie had just posed in front of the monster's body and made a bunch of pictures, then told Olivia she had something to show her. She'd agreed easily because getting one over on Bubbles and telling her to shower off the vomit was totally worth it, but maybe the mandatory blindfold Jackie had pulled from somewhere should have had her think better.
Nothing in for it, she'd gotten on the ice and she wasn't getting off until they arrived… wherever Jackie was taking her. Though her butt was really getting c-
"Muh, we're there."
That was a really Jackie thing to say.
Olivia took off her blindfold just in time to realize the platform she was sitting on was being tilted, making her yelp and stumble onto her feet, still being rolled through a door of some kind before she regained her bearings.
"Come." Then Jackie was holding her hand and pulling her along. Pushy as always.
Or pully? Was that a word?
"Hold on Jackie, what is this place?" It looked like a house, but-
"Home."
Olivia froze. Jackie had taken her to her home? That was huge, but also why? And…
"Jackie, I have to be home soon, I can't stay for long."
"Muh," the younger girl shook her head. "Wrote your mom. Is okay."
"Wait, since when do y-"
"Come. Living room." With that, Olivia was being forcefully showed around the house, or only the ground floor for the moment. The living room was a bit cluttered, but the thing that kept her occupied was the wide fireplace merrily burning away set inside one of the walls.
She could see faces inside of it. It was very, very disturbing.
So she was occupied trying to look closer without looking like she was and growing more and more horrified that this may be just like the fogrunner had been; the souls of people eternally trapped to burn in agony.
What was Jackie doing and why?!
But before she could (bring up the nerve to) say anything, she was drawn further, Jackie almost aggressively proud of showing her house to Olivia. The kitchen, the bathroom, the stairs to go up, the veranda doors leading to what looked like a forest of some kind (?!), the stairs dow-
"No downstairs," Jackie said, emphatically standing in front of her. "No."
"… Okay?" Was the basement where all the evil experiments on souls happened? Was Jackie a serial soul murderer?
"Muh. Good." She nodded.
What else could she even say about this?
Then they turned right around and back to the veranda doors, sliding glass ones that to be unlatched with a little mechanism. Maybe Jackie hadn't realized Olivia wasn't supposed to see her murder basement?
They stepped out. It was dark and smelled of earth in way Olivia wasn't really used to; maybe it really was the middle of a forest somewhere? But why would Jackie-
"Oh my, you've brought a new friend." The voice was making shivers run don Olivia's spine and not in a good way.
"Muh."
From between the trees surrounding the clearing placed immediately behind Jackie's home a woman came striding. Though it couldn't really be called that, for it was… a monster.
A monster Olivia had no idea how to fight if Jackie was apparently cohabitating with it.
"Oh, look at that, you're bred already. Good girl." Olivia blinked despite the dark, green hand patting her much brighter shade of hair. "Has my little stud been busy?"
"Muh."
Okay, a couple things. Jackie was this woman's 'little stud'?! Was she the reason Jackie was… like she was?
Jackie was listening to her? How? Jackie didn't listen to people, that was just not how things were done!
Also, Olivia was what?!
"I am Viridis. You have been bred quite thoroughly, filled with the power of my little stud here."
Jackie closed her eyes and leaned into the pats she received and what the hell wrong priorities!
"I- I can't be pregnant, you're wrong!"
Viridis quirked a smile at her, full, adult body on full display still. "I never am about these things. You can take it on faith."
Somehow, the absolute confidence failed to seem misplaced.
Olivia could feel the ground opening up below herself, the realization that this monster woman was serious and might not just be joking or trying to trick her slowly overtaking her mind.
She hadn't even noticed she'd reflexively grasped her spears until they fell to the ground. Olivia had to breathe, why couldn't she breathe, what was wrong-
"Muh. Ice cream. Share."
Jackie dragged her off once again. Like she always did.