This is a very brief one shot concerning a character I relate to.
"How to date a dragon."
The words softly glowed on the monitor. With a half-frustrated sigh, Kobayashi used both her palms into her face to rub at her eyes, knocking her glasses askew in process.
That title is truly terrible.
Kobayashi doesn't strike a line through it though. After all, it's the question of the hour.
She reaches for her can of beer, only be greeted by the taste barley tea. Right, her promise to Tohru to cut down on her drinking. Since the two of them started sharing a bedroom, Tohru had become something of a ninny about everything concerning Kobayashi's health.
What a pain…
The childish part of her wanted to vent. Wasn't happily ever after to happen right about now? I mean her and Tohru have shared an apartment for nearly two years. They had shared a bedroom for two months! Wasn't everything supposed to start clicking right now?
Did they yet share a life?
Kobayashi paused as the thought occurred. That was kind of the question now wasn't it? A very important question given the current circumstances. Kobayashi's life really centered on her work. It wouldn't be unfair to say that Kobayashi spent more of her time with Elma than she did Tohru. An undeniable fact that would never, and Kobayashi meant never, be lost on Tohru.
Kobayashi had thought that once she admitted her feelings for Tohru, the Dragon Maid would stop pushing as hard. Kobayashi really should have known better. The line in their relationship now shifting, Tohru looked at it like she was finally making headway and tripled her efforts. Tripled efforts from Tohru were not for the feint of heart. But no matter how hard Tohru pushed, an old stumbling block kept getting in the dragon's way. Kobayashi remained fundamentally unsure as to how much she could give Tohru. This uncertainty was causing them to struggle. That was not in doubt. Which meant sooner or later, Tohru was going to do what she was going to do, and push harder.
Just the thought had Kobayashi wanting to retreat…
This is really my fault isn't it?
Kobayashi closed her eyes and asked herself aloud, "What's wrong with me?" Kobayashi's analytical mind began to analyze its owner, and its analysis wasn't particularly kind. Kobayashi loved Tohru. That much was no longer in doubt. Tohru loved Kobayashi. That much had never been in doubt. Part of Kobayashi had believed that was the end. Calm waters and smooth sailing from here on. Part of Kobayashi had felt this meant she had to stop trying and it would all come about naturally from there.
Kobayashi chuckled and smiled.
Well as naturally as any human and extremely violent dragon of chaos could hope to be.
It wasn't though. However Kobayashi believed she now had the most fundamental question as to understanding why. Kobayashi carefully considered her first step to answering that question. The first step was clear immediately, and with that clarity, so was what behavior Kobayashi needed to immediately correct.
Under her journal's header, Kobayashi wrote her first note to herself.
"Accept being wanted." Yes. This is where fixing things needed to begin.
A small voice cooed through the door of the office, "Goodnight Kobayashi." The programmer smiled at Kanna's gentle call.
Kanna was safe. She had always been that small, quiet interaction that rarely demanded more than what Kobayashi was willing to give. An interaction that had gently filled a part of Kobayashi's life. Kanna was gentle. Very much unlike a certain Dragon of Armageddon who constantly shoved as violently as possible. But then the way Kobayashi loved Tohru was fundamentally different from the way she loved Kanna.
Kobayashi's smile became rueful.
Tohru put in all that work for this one singularly unspecial person. A person who hadn't even been able to admit she had been lonely until the Emperor of Demise himself had arrived to personally show Kobayashi just how special Tohru truly was. She rather owed him a thank you for that. Should she ever meet him again, she promised herself she would. It was perhaps the most valuable lesson she had ever been given.
Yes, accept being wanted.
This wasn't going to be easy for her, but relationships were two way streets. It wasn't fair to keep making Tohru do all the work. With that mindset, Kobayashi rose from her chair. She moved to the door of her office, opening it just in time to tell Kanna goodnight before the young dragon closed the door to the room she shared with Illulu.
"Goodnight, little Kanna."
Kanna turned, her face was seldom expressive, but she offered Kobayashi one faint smile before closing her door.
Kobayashi looked around the apartment. Only one small light was on, something easy to shut off on the way to her bedroom. Only it wasn't just Kobayashi's bedroom anymore. Kobayashi dry swallowed a bit. This night, like all others for the last two months, Kobayashi was all nerves before crawling into bed with Tohru.
Kobayashi steadied herself briefly, took a less than bracing bull of Barley Tea, then slowly opened her room.
Yep, pretty much what she figured.
Strewn on the floor was a rose petal path to their small bed that was absolutely covered in them. A very scantily clad Tohru lay in what was honestly a seductive manner, red eyes glowing in the near dark.
"Accept being wanted." Kobayashi mouthed the words to herself. She closed her eyes, and slowly turned up the lights. With a far firmer voice she said, "Tohru, we need to talk."
Tohru's eyes dimmed with disappointment and perhaps a touch of fear. Kobayashi felt truly bad about the latter. "Of course, Miss Kobayashi." Tohru put on a brave face as she changed her scales from… well from something Lucua would think twice about before switching to her more typical maid attire. "I suppose this is a bit much. I'll get right on cleaning it up."
As the blonde dragon looked away to hide her disappointment. It was too much, because Tohru was already in full retreat. The opposite of what Kobayashi wanted. Had she so beaten down the dragon that a few words already had Tohru ready to accept the answer was, 'No?' Then Kobayashi realized the answer, far more often than not, was 'No.' How many times in the last couple of months had Kobayashi told Tohru that she had a headache. Or that her back was hurting. Or Kanna was awake. How many excuses?
Kobayashi instantly stepped into her Dragon Maid and kissed her. Really kissed her. Tohru had a couple of inches in height on her, so Kobayashi had to get on her toes to maximize body contact. Kobayashi had doubts that she was much of a kisser. However this time, whatever she lacked in skill she tried to make up for in pure force. Until it almost felt like her lips were bruised. Tohru was so stiff and surprised at the outset, Kobayashi almost felt like it was her turn to face rejection, but Tohru soon put Kobayashi's fears at ease.
The kiss became gentler as both of them relaxed into it. There was a strange sensation as Tohru's body temperature began to rise, showing she was getting excited. Excited… because Kobayashi was all she really wanted. Damn, that was both exhilarating and scary. Something they needed to talk about… before, well before Kobayashi told Tohru she definitely didn't have any back pain tonight.
With that thought of postponement, Kobayashi ended the kiss. "You don't need to clean up, but we do need to talk."
Tohru blinked rapidly, and in doing so, started to cool to Kobayashi's touch as a hint she was calming down. Tohru side-eyed the rose petal strewn bed with a smile, and Kobayashi realized Tohru believed she had just discovered a new seduction technique.
Before her Dragon Maid could respond, Kobayashi was again bold. She reached up and touched the very base of one of Tohru's horns through the blond hair. It was a sensitive spot Kobayashi had learned rapidly after the two of them became intimate. Tohru jumped in a way similar to a human being goosed, and turned cherry red.
Kobayash smiled a truly honest smile. "So pretty." A blushing millennia old being whose name was spoken with fear and reverence in multiple worlds was mind boggling to Kobayashi. Mind boggling, but here and now, also adorable.
Tohru coughed briefly as she pulled herself together, and became the reined in side of herself that Tohru saw as purely professional. Kobayashi always saw straight through it of course, but appreciated the effort nonetheless. "What do we need to discuss then?"
"The fact that I'm a bad girlfriend. That you deserve better."
And all of Tohru's false decorum evaporated, "No! No! No! You are in fact a very good girlfriend! You are everything I want—"
Kobayashi held up a hand. Tohru looked at Kobayashi. There was that hint of fear. "You deserve better."
Tohru hung her head and voice became very soft. "Are you breaking up with me?"
Kobayashi grabbed Tohru's hands. Stooping low so she could look the single most magical person Kobayashi knew she would ever meet in the eye. She thought of her no longer existing loneliness. Loneliness so pervassive, Kobayashi hadn't even realized how unhappy she had become. Making sure Tohru was looking at her, Kobayashi put every ounce of love she could into her own expression.
"Never. Not even a human could be that stupid."
After a moment, Tohru slowly started to smile. "Silly inferior creatures…"
"Yeah we are. And one those creatures needs to be better. Her girlfriend deserves better."
Tohru breathed in deep. When Tohru now looked at Kobayashi she revealed the truest part of herself. The wisest and harshest part. A part Kobayashi still felt intimidated by. "Is this so you can return to drinking more than three beers a night?"
Kobayashi smiled, "No. You're right. I think I need a better way to unwind and let loose."
Tohru nodded sagely, "Just be careful what hobbies you pick. Passions are how I have lost many friends—"
"I think I am going to try having more sex."
Tohru blinked a bit, but otherwise continued on as if Kobayashi hadn't interrupted her. "Like I was saying, fully embrace your hobbies to the greatest extent you can. A life devoid of passion is not a life worth living."
"You're very transparent, you know."
Tohru looked at her. There was no cute blushing this time. This was a look completely unique to Dragons. As much as anything, a dragon was defined by their desire. Even Kanna could look this alien when conversations turned to Saikawa or her father. Kobayashi stood in the gaze of absolute avarice. It always felt scary probably because the depth of this gaze was so alien.
But she had to accept being wanted like this, because Tohru deserved Kobayashi accepting even those parts of her that made the programmer nervous.
With a shy smile, Kobayashi asked her Maid, "So can you start helping me with that tonight?"
Tohru slowly nodded as her smile began to blossom. There was joy mixed with th dark need in her glowing red eyes as she swooped Kobayashi into a bridal carry. "Oh course, and in return you can start eating my tail!"
"Still ethically opposed!"
Tohru, "Oh come on—"
This time Kobayashi managed to touch both of Tohru's horns and had the distinct pleasure of watching a startled Tohru's brain completely reset itself.
Tohru's dark smile followed by her willful disintegration of Kobayashi's clothing was only to be expected.
Hey, brief little one shot as a love letter for an anime that helped me feel better in the midst of some personal stuff. Thank you Kyoani.