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I do not 'Adventure Time.'

Chapter 37

How I Met My Mother

"So, wait, hold on…you turned him back into the Ice King?"

Finn took another deep inhale from his inhaler, made of crystal to avoid being melted in the temperatures of the Fire Kingdom, courtesy of the Princess. "Yeah, none of us were happy about that. Especially Marceline. Glob, it must have been heartbreaking for her."

Flame Princess, cuddling her boyfriend underneath the red, flame-retardant blanket on her bed, sighed onto Finn's chest. "Must have been nice to have a father figure who was actually supportive and caring."

"Right?" Finn placed his crystal inhaler on Phoebe's nightstand and held her a little closer. "Simon was actually kind of cool."

Phoebe giggled and played with the sapphire necklace on Finn's neck keeping him alive, flanked by his long, golden hair. "I still can't believe his real name is Simon."

"What did you expect it to be?"

"Honestly? Something like 'Ernest' or 'Cyrus' or…I don't know, something that would suggest right off the bat that he's crazy," Phoebe said.

"Oh, yeah. I guess you and IK aren't exactly BFFs," Finn assumed. "What with the two of you duking it out after he cooled down the Fire Kingdom."

"I don't like the Ice King, but I really don't hold any grudge against him," Phoebe's fire increased. "He was working for Princess Bubblegum, who had me locked in a lantern when I was a baby and destroyed all but one of my Kingdom's Fire Sentinels."

Finn flinched at the sight of FP's rising flames. "Uh…Well, at least now Ice King is too scared of you to mess with you anymore."

"I know he's scared of me." FP's fire died back down and closed her eyes. "...Pretty much everyone is."

"Uh, well, I mean…" Finn shrugged. "I'm not scared of you."

Flame Princess looked up at Finn with a flat look.

"...Okay, yeah, I'm terrified of you," Finn admitted. "Truth be told, I think that's one of the things I find attractive about you. I've been told that I have an unhealthy attraction to dangerous ladies."

"How's Marceline?"

"Hanging out with her ex-girlfriend."

"And what's this I heard about you hanging out with someone called Huntress Wizard?"

"So, how's your dad doing?" Finn asked in a desperate attempt to change the subject. "And how's Flint doing?"

"Flint's behaving himself," Phoebe said. "Having your legs dipped in the execution pool will teach you a thing or two about being polite."

Finn's eyes widened. "...Yikes, girl."

"And as for Dad. Well, I took your advice and made his accommodations a bit more comfortable." FP shrugged. "I haven't gone to see him in a while though. Not since the Fire Festival actually."

"Well, you wanna go see him?" Finn asked. "I bet he's pretty lonely in his lamp."

FP sighed and rolled her eyes. She sat up and leaned over to the nightstand on her side of the bed. Holding the blanket to her chest, she poured herself a cup of the kerosene sitting on the nightstand.

"When we started dating, I made you promise not to meddle with my family affairs." FP took a drink from her cup, making her flames increase for a moment. "You know my family is evil, and you know that they don't like you. Remember when Flint tried to kill you? He came pretty damn close."

"How is suggesting we go and see your dad meddling?" Finn asked.

"You know what I'm talking about," said Phoebe. "I'll deal with my unstable family. You just keep being my favorite thing to snuggle with."

Finn blushed. "Uh… Look, I'm sorry. I guess that whole thing with Simon is still leaving me feeling bummed about having a really crappy dad. You're right, it would have been really nice to have a decent father figure like Simon was to Marceline."

"Mmm-hmm."

"But, I mean, it wouldn't hurt to go and visit your dad," Finn continued. "Also, come on, we can't just spend your entire free day in your bedroom."

"You really complaining?" Phoebe asked with a smirk.

Finn blushed again. "I mean…I think I will be once my asthma gets bad enough. And, by the time that happens, you may need to poke a hole in my throat just so I can breathe. So before that happens, well, going to see your dad seems like the best means of escape."

The Flame Princess laughed and shook her head. "Okay, fine. We'll go." She moved to the edge of the bed and picked her dress up off of the floor. "Get dressed, cutie."

"Uh…about that…"

"Oh, not again." FP sighed. "It's fine, it's fine. I made your dad's jacket unburnable and there's another set of fire-proof clothes in the closet for you."

"The white bear hat and everything, right? I have an iconic look to keep up."

"It wouldn't kill you to switch it up every once and a while, you know."

"You can't beat iconic."

"If you say so."

Flame Princess, wearing a lovely, sleeveless, red and orange sundress with her crown atop her fiery hair, unlocked the large, metal door. She put the key back in her dress and entered the Lantern Room, followed by Finn, who was wearing the same outfit he always wore, thanks to Phoebe.

Finn's eyes widened in surprise. The former Flame King was still trapped in a glass lantern suspended in the air, but the entire room had gotten an upgrade. Poster's decorated the walls and so did a large, ornate grandfather clock. A jukebox sat against the wall in front of the lantern and played classic rock music, presumably on constant shuffle since the Flame King couldn't reach it. There was a lava lamp here and there sitting on a stand along with a vase or two. Flame King himself was lounging in his lantern, jamming to the music.

"Now this is a prison," Finn said. "Man, I hope my jail cell is this nice if I ever get convicted for a felony."

"Like you would ever get convicted for a felony," said FP.

"Right? Mr. Goody-Two-Shoes over here." Flame King sat on his knees and looked down at his two visitors. "Hello, sweetheart. Hello…uh…Flynn, was it?"

"It's Finn, actually."

"Right, right right right." Flame King smiled and gestured to his room. "So, you like what I've done with the place? Not bad, if I do say so myself."

"You mean what I've done with the place?" Flame Princess asked.

"Can't let me have anything anymore, can you?" Flame King complained.

"Wha…I let you have all of this freakin' stuff!" FP gestured in irritation at the room. "Which, by the way, is way more than you ever gave me when you had me put in that lantern!"

"I gave you a toy to play with."

"No, you didn't."

"...Oh, yeah." Flame King coughed into his flaming fist. "So, uh…how are you doing, sweetie?"

"Oh, I'm doing good." FP pulled Finn close to her. "Me and Finn started dating now."

"You're dating this hero?" Flame King asked in disgust. "He's not nearly evil enough to be worthy of courting you. He's the least evil person I've ever met. It's just awful."

"Well, too bad." Phoebe gave Finn a kiss on the cheek. "We're dating and you'll just have to deal with it."

"Is part of the reason you agreed to visit your dad because you wanted to rub it in his face that you and I were dating?" Finn asked.

"Part of the reason, yeah," Phoebe admitted.

Flame King groaned and shook his head. "Where did I go wrong?"

"When you locked me in a lantern when I was a baby, maybe?" FP asked flatly.

"I thought that was a sure way to make you evil," said Flame King. "Make you all bitter and vengeful and stuff."

"Oh, it left me feeling bitter," Flame Princess replied calmly and angrily. "I can assure you."

"Crappy dads." Finn shook his head. "Crappy, crappy dads."

"Your crappy dad was just a thief and a crook who almost got you killed twice. My crappy dad is…this guy," said FP, jerking a thumb at Flame King. "And at least you had your mom, who genuinely cared about your happiness and well-being. I don't have a mom."

Flame King quickly looked away. "Right. That's right. You definitely do not have a mom. Right."

Finn looked at Flame King, noticing how weird the former king was acting. "...Something you wanna share?"

"No, not at all. No," said Flame King. His reply was a bit too quick though.

Finn tilted his head curiously at the king.

"Come on, Finn, what are you trying to get out of him?" Phoebe asked. "I don't have a mom. I've told you before that Flame People only have one parent. And mine is inside that lantern because he sucks and I hate him."

"Exactly!" Flame King exclaimed. "So there's no reason to delve into the matter anymore."

This time, Phoebe picked up on her dad's weird behavior as well. She narrowed her eyes at the Flame King. "...What aren't you telling me?"

"Phoebe, sweetheart," said FK. "If there's anybody you can count on to be honest with you, it's me."

Phoebe stared at her father with a look that was as flat as a sheet of paper.

"...Okay, look. Phoebe. You don't actually have a mother," Flame King said. "But…I mean, technically…arguably…you might?"

"I might?" Phoebe demanded. "We're Fire People. We don't have more than one parent."

"Well, yes, but…" Flame King took a deep breath and twiddled his thumbs. "Sometimes, not all the time, but sometimes, when a Flame Person develops strong feelings for someone, then there's a chance that one of his or her offspring will…bear great resemblance to whoever that Flame Person had feelings for."

Finn and Phoebe's eyes both shot wide open.

"It's normally really rare," Flame King said. "I mean, Flint is obviously a chip of the old block. Randy and…the other one, are also modeled after me. You though, Phoebe…well, you were a surprise."

"Dad, what are you talking about?" Flame Princess asked, beginning to look and sound agitated.

Flame King looked away.

Phoebe's eyes burned white hot. "I swear to Glob, Dad, if you don't answer me, I'll strip this room bare and add in a pool!"

The Flame King flinched, then he let out a long sigh. To Finn and Phoebe's confusion, the king developed a look that might have been remorse. Something that neither of them assumed the former king was even capable of.

"...Many years ago, back when I was still just a prince…I…met someone."

Finn and Phoebe gasped and glanced at each other.

"Oh, get over it," said Flame King. "We met during one of my travels abroad. I did that a lot in my youth, looking for something new to burn down. She was a Water Nymph. And, yes, I realize the irony of that."

"What was she like?" Phoebe asked softly. It was hard to tell if she was scared, or excited, or anxious.

"She was… Dear Glob, she was gorgeous. And…weirdly nice," Flame King said. "And by that, I mean I've never met anyone as nice as her, and it was baffling for someone like me. She was a spirit of water, so I couldn't even touch her. All I could really do was talk to her. And, I did. For years, I would go back to her and just…talk to her."

"You fell in love with her," Finn guessed.

Flame King refused to answer.

"Oh my glob." Phoebe looked to the floor. "...I was made in the image of the only person in this world you ever had feelings for. I was made from the love you had for that Water Nymph…for my mom."

Flame King closed his eyes and nodded.

Phoebe shook her head. "All these years, you've tried to make me like you. You've tried to make me evil when I was one of the few Flame People in existence who was made from love."

FK sighed. "After I became King,"

"After you killed my uncle and took the throne for yourself, you mean?"

"Yeah, after that. I stopped seeing her. I never expected to ever see her face again. That is, until you were born." FK chuckled. "The most powerful of my children, and you were shaped in the image of the Water Nymph that I…fancied."

"What was her name?" Phoebe asked impatiently.

"Daphne," the king answered. "Her name was Daphne."

"Where is she?" Phoebe demanded.

"I…honestly don't know where you can find her," Flame King admitted. "I was never good with directions. I'm one of those people who pretty much rely on GPS."

Phoebe gritted her teeth and growled. Her flames increased as her anger did.

"We can easily find out," Finn quickly said. "My neighbors are Water Nymphs. They might know about her."

Flame Princess looked at Finn. She closed her eyes and took a calming breath, letting her flames settle back down.

"...Let's go, Finn."

FP took Finn's hand and headed out the door, dragging her boyfriend along with her.

"If you do see Daphne, tell her I said 'hey,' would ya?" Flame King asked as Phoebe and Finn left.

Finn pulled his motorcycle up to his treehouse, putting up the kickstand and helping Flame Princess off.

FP looked up at the treehouse. "Hey, how come you never invite me over to your house?"

"Because it's a tree. And, you're made of fire."

"Oh, yeah. Nevermind." FP looked at Finn. "So, where are those Water Nymphs?"

"In the pond." Finn led the Princess to the pond in front of the house, where Susan, BMO, Neptr, and Jake were all hanging out. Jake was playing the viola for the two robots and the giant woman, who were all sitting in front of the bulldog and enjoying his music.

"Hey, guys. What's up?" Finn asked as he and Phoebe approached.

"Oh, hey, Finn. Hey, Flame Princess," said Jake.

"Finn! Glowing lady!" Susan cheered. "Doggy play music!"

"It has been quite enjoyable, Creator," said Neptr.

"Football likes it too," said BMO. "That is why we are by the pond."

"Yeah, you're really good at that, Jake," Finn said. "That viola sounds awesome."

"Hey, thanks," said a high-pitched, nasally voice. "I keep it really nice in here."

"Who said that?" said Finn.

"Right here." A pink worm poked its head out of Jake's viola. "Hey, what's up? I'm Shelby. The worm who lives in Jake's viola."

"Oh… Uh, okay," said Finn. "Nice to meet you. Why, uh…why do you live in Jake's viola?"

"Eh. It's cheaper than getting an apartment," said Shelby. "Plus, I mean, look at me. I don't take up a lot of space."

"Can we talk to those Water Nymphs now?" Flame Princess asked impatiently.

"Why do you want to talk to the Water Nymphs?" Jake grinned teasingly. "Gettin' jelly?"

Phoebe's head slowly turned to Jake, hair blazing and eyes burning.

Jake went 'meep' and shrunk down to the size of a soda can, running over to hide behind BMO.

"Yeah, so…let me talk to them, huh?" Finn walked up to the pond's edge. "Merry? Cherry? Sherry? You girls home?"

Finn waited for a few seconds before the Water Nymphs all poked their heads out of the water.

"Oh, hey, Finn," the short-haired Merry greeted with a sweet smile. She then noticed Flame Princess and frowned at her, as did the other two Nymphs. "Oh, you brought her. Great."

"Watch it, Nymph. Or I'll boil you," FP threatened.

"Please, you don't scare us," the lipstick-wearing Cherry. "You're made of fire. We live in water. Do your worst."

Before Flame Princess could do her worst, Finn stepped in between FP and the Nymphs. "Wait, wait, hold up. Look, girls, we just wanted to ask if you three happened to know a Water Nymph named Daphne. We think she might be Phoebe's mom."

"Her mom?" Jake came out from his hiding place behind BMO and inflated to his regular size. "I thought Flame People only had one parent? They, like, reproduce asexually or something?"

"It's a long story," Finn turned back to the Nymphs. "So, you girls know any Water Nymphs named Daphne who look like her?" he asked, pointing at FP.

"Daphne, you said?" the ponytailed Sherry asked. She looked at Flame Princess thoughtfully. "...Actually, yeah, I think I might know who you're looking for."

"You do?" Flame Princess asked eagerly. "Who?"

"About…maybe a hundred miles northeast of here, there's a really pretty lake with a gorgeous waterfall, decorated with lily pads, chirping frogs, buzzing dragonflies, really, the place is amazing," said Sherry. "About ten Water Nymphs share the pond. I went there once when I got invited to a birthday party. Had a really fun time."

"How come we weren't invited?" Merry asked.

"Yeah, what the heck?" Cherry complained.

"You were saying?" Flame Princess said impatiently.

"Well, one of those Nymphs I met at the lake, I believe, was named Daphne. At least, I'm pretty sure it started with a 'D.' It could've been, like, Dorothy or something. But, looking at her," Sherry pointed at FP. "I have to say, you actually do look like the Nymph I met. But, I only talked to her for a couple of minutes. I'm not even sure if she actually lived at that pond or was just visiting for the party."

"We're going to that pond." Flame Princess grabbed Finn's hand, thankfully still protected by his sapphire necklace, and dragged him away. "Let's go, Finn."

"Freakin' red-heads, man," Shelby commented once FP was gone. "Glob damn."

"Are we heading in the right direction?" Phoebe asked as Finn rode them across Ooo, shouting so Finn could hear her over the motorcycle.

"All she said was northeast, so…I hope so," Finn answered.

"Great," Phoebe grumbled.

"Hey, so…if we do find Daphne, then…have you thought about what you're gonna say to her?" Finn asked.

"I…haven't actually given it a lot of thought, no," FP admitted. "I mean…I have no idea what having a mom is even supposed to be like."

"...Do you ever get nightmares?" Finn asked after a pause.

"What?" FP asked.

"Because a mom is the person who comes into your room and tells you it's just a bad dream. Then she kisses your forehead, and tells you to go back to sleep. And when you do go back to sleep, you don't have a nightmare anymore."

Finn took a deep breath. "A mom is someone who keeps trying to get you to find a date with a nice girl, as incredibly annoying as that gets. A mom is someone who makes you breakfast, lunch, and dinner, even after you get old enough to do it yourself. She tucks you in at night, she loves you more than anything else in the world, and vice versa. She gives you an entire lecture about being safe every single time you walk out the door. She…she…"

"Finn?" Phoebe reached up to touch Finn's cheek, but she immediately recoiled her hand when his tears stung her fingers.

"Oh, glob! Phoebe, I'm sorry, are you okay?" Finn asked.

"I'm fine," said the Flame Princess. "I should be asking you that though."

Finn focused his attention back on riding the motorcycle. "I was just…I just…I miss my mom, that's all."

FP leaned her head against Finn's back. "I can tell. Are you gonna be okay?"

"Why does everyone keep asking me that?" Finn asked.

"Because we all care about you. And because of that, we worry about you."

Finn sighed. "I'm okay, Phoebe. But, I'd be lying if I said that helping you find the mom you never even knew existed wasn't a bit personal for me."

"Well…thank you for helping me find her," FP said.

"Hey, of course," said Finn. "You can count on me for anything."

Flame Princess beamed at her boyfriend.

"Oh, hey. I think we're here."

Phoebe looked past Finn and her eyes widened with awe. Just as Sherry had promised, it really was a beautiful lake. A sparkling body of water the size of an entire baseball field decorated with cattails and lily pads. Frogs hopped from lily pad to lily pad and dragonflies flew above the cattails. The lake sat at the base of a tall cliff, filled by a waterfall streaming down the cliff wall, creating a soothing ambiance.

About a dozen Water Nymphs sat around and in the lake, chatting, giggling, or simply enjoying the sun. There was one Nymph sitting on a smooth rock sticking above the water who was playing music on her flute. Most of the Nymphs turned their heads as Finn pulled his bike up to the lake's edge and put up the kickstand. Finn and Phoebe got off the bike and walked up to the lake.

"Hey. How's it going?" Finn greeted.

"Ooo, well, now that you're here, handsome?" The nearest Water Nymph floated up and rested her head on her hand, smiling coyly at Finn as did most of the other Nymphs. "Oh, it's going great all of a sudden."

Finn blushed and averted his gaze shyly. Phoebe, frowning angrily, stepped in front of Finn. "Watch it, you freakin' nympho. He's mine."

The Water Nymph just raised an eyebrow. "Oh, like I'm scared of some fire floozy who can't touch water."

"What the funk did you just-"

"Hold it! Hold it!" Finn dashed in front of the enraged Phoebe. "Remember why we're here!"

"Well, why are all Nymphs so damn…needy?" Phoebe demanded.

"I mean…" Finn shrugged. "I don't…I don't think Cloud Nymphs are…all that needy."

"No, but, I kid you not, Cloud Nymphs are into some weird stuff," the Water Nymph said. "I mean some weird stuff. I would know, I dated a Cloud Nymph before. Glob, that was the craziest week of my life."

"Uh…good to know," Finn said. "Look, we're not here to cause trouble. We're looking for a Water Nymph named Daphne who might look like her." Finn pointed at FP, who still looked angry.

The Water Nymph blinked at the Flame Princess, taking a closer look at her. "Oh my glob, you do look like Daphne."

"You mean she's here?" FP asked.

"Yeah, she's by the waterfall, wearing the blue one-piece."

"Finn, come on." Phoebe grabbed Finn's hand and pulled him around the lake to the waterfall.

"Freakin' red-heads," the Water Nymph muttered. "Glob damn."

Turns out, the Water Nymph they were looking for was the one who was playing the flute. The rock she was sitting on was close enough to the shore to get a good look at her. And when he did, Finn's eyes widened at the sight of her.

"Woah."

Water Nymphs in general tended to be pretty, but this one seemed particularly beautiful. Instead of a two-piece bikini like most Water Nymphs wore, she wore an ocean-blue, one-piece instead. She sat Indian-style on the smooth rock as she played beautiful music on her wooden flute, eyes closed as she swayed side-to-side and played the music. Her watery hair flowed down her back like a gentle waterfall. She didn't look old by any means, but she looked somehow older than most Water Nymphs did. More mature, was a better description.

She also looked a lot like Flame Princess.

FP noticed Finn staring at the Water Nymph and angrily elbowed his ribs.

"Ow!" Finn complained.

The Water Nymph opened her eyes and stopped playing her music. She put her flute down and looked over at her two visitors.

'Oh, hello," The Nymph greeted with a friendly smile. She even sounded a little bit like Phoebe. "Sorry, I didn't notice you two there."

"Um, hi," Finn greeted. "Are you Daphne?"

"Yeah, that's me." Daphne looked over at Phoebe and her eyes widened with surprise, apparently noticing the resemblance. "I hope I don't sound rude, but…who are you two?"

Phoebe, looking nervous, rubbed her arm and stepped forward. "Um…did you used to know the Flame King? He might have still been a prince back when you met him?"

"The Flame…?" Daphne blinked. "You mean…Lenny sent you? Wow, I haven't seen him in years."

FP stared at Daphne, then laughed behind her hand. "L…Lenny? My dad's real name…is Lenny?"

"Well, short for Leonard. At least, that's what he told me." Daphne blinked and frowned. "Wait…your dad?"

"Yeah, about that." Phoebe took a deep breath. "Okay, so, Flame People are born asexually, with only one parent, like my brothers were. But, since my dad, I guess, had feelings for you…well, the feelings he had for you…made me in your image. Making…making you, technically…my mom."

Daphne gasped and brought a hand to her mouth.

"My name's Phoebe." The Princess smiled awkwardly. "It's nice to meet you."

Daphne stood up and walked across the water to Phoebe, who seemed startled as the Nymph approached her.

"My goodness." Daphne reached her hand up to Phoebe's face. "I can't believe I-"

When Daphne's hand touched Phoebe's face, there was a hissing sound and some steam. Daphne and Phoebe both immediately cried out in pain and recoiled their hand and face. Daphne rubbed her palm and Phoebe rubbed her cheek.

"Oh my glob, I am so sorry!" They both cried in perfect unison. "Are you okay?! I'm so sorry! I hope I didn't hurt you too badly!"

"Wow. It's like looking in an elemental mirror with these two," Finn said to himself.

"Um…I'm sorry, but, who are you again?" Daphne asked Finn.

"Oh, I'm Finnegan Campbell," Finn greeted. "My friends call me Finn. I'm Phoebe's boyfriend."

"Finn as in Finn the Human?" Daphne asked. "And the two of you are dating?" She smiled at Phoebe. "Good job."

Phoebe blushed and smiled bashfully.

"Say, speaking of which, how's Lenny doing?" Daphne asked. "Is he still the Flame King?"

"Well, no. I am, actually," FP asked.

"Really?" Daphne asked, appearing impressed. "What happened with Lenny? Did you have to overthrow him or something? Because knowing him, that sounds about right."

"Well. He locked me in a lantern when I was a baby and kept me in there until I was fourteen. And after that, it was kind of a downward spiral."

"He what?!"

"Well, yeah. Turns out, I-"

"Hello, ladies!"

"Oh, no. Not this guy again," Daphne muttered unhappily.

Finn and Phoebe turned around to see a green, fat guy waddle toward the lake. He was a portly fellow with long, wild, grayish-green hair and a long nose. He wore a light-green shirt and dark-green pants that looked like they were both made of grass. There was a leaf on his bearded chin and one on his forehead. In his hand, he wielded a green magic wand.

"Who the heck is this butt?" Finn asked.

"The Grassy Wizard," Daphne said bitterly. "He comes here all the time, forcing us to dance and play music for him. If we don't, he's threatened to poison our lake."

"Yeah, and I totally will," the Grassy Wizard said. "Okay, ladies! I think I'm in the mood for a samba. Flute Nymph, get ready to lead them!"

"Hey, you donk, why don't you get lost?" Finn asked.

"Get out of my way, boy," the Grassy Wizard said in a bored tone, waving his hand in a shooing motion. "Unless you know how to play the flute as well."

"Actually, I do. And I'm pretty good at it. But, that's beside the point." Finn drew his sword. "Either you leave these Water Nymphs alone and never come back, or I make like a lawn mower and…you know."

"HA! Do you have any idea who I am?!" Grassy Wizard demanded. "I am the Grassy Wizard! And you're just some stupid kid wearing some stupid hat!"

"It's iconic. I already had this argument." Finn pointed at Phoebe. "Also, she's the Flame Princess. Ruler of the Fire Kingdom and Fire Elemental reincarnate."

"Say what?" Grassy Wizard asked, suddenly looking worried.

"I'm the Fire…what now?" FP asked.

"Oh, right. It's this whole thing, I'll explain later." Finn jerked his thumb at GW. "Right after you turn him into a pile of scorched grass."

"Uhhhhhh…" Phoebe grabbed Finn's arm and pulled him away from Daphne and out of earshot. "Do you think maybe you can take care of this?" she whispered. "I don't want to seem…destructive in front of my…in front of Daphne. We just met, and I want to try to show her that I'm not just some living firestorm."

"Phoebe, come on-"

"Finn, most of Ooo is afraid of me. Even you." FP's face became imploring. "That last person on this planet that I want to look at me with fear is my…is Daphne."

"You can take this guy with literally a flick of your wrist," said Finn.

"Oh, you can take him just as easily as I can." Phoebe kissed Finn's cheek and batted her eyelashes. "Pleeeeeease?"

Finn sighed and rolled his eyes. "Okay, fine. I'll try to make this quick."

Finn walked up and aimed his sword at the Grassy Wizard.

"I'll turn you into mulch, boy!" GW raised his wand and it glowed with green light.

Large blades of grass shot out of the ground and at Finn like spikes in a booby-trapped dungeon. Using Nothung, Finn managed to deflect and cut away the blades of grass that came at him. The Grassy Wizard grinned and the wand's light increased. Even more blades of grass shot out of the ground and at a greater speed and frequency. Finn cried out in pain as he received a few cuts, trying to deflect all of the extending blades of grass.

"Ha-ha! Nice try, boy!" Grassy Wizard gloated. "You are no match for my magic! I will cut you to pieces in front of these Nymphs and remind them who's-"

Finn summoned an ice ninja star and tossed it at the wizard, receiving a few extra cuts as punishment.

The ice ninja star struck the Grassy Wizard's wand and knocked it out of his hand, canceling its magic. While GW was stunned, Finn charged at him. With a fearful yelp, the Grassy Wizard swung his magic hands and deflected each of Finn's attacks with a blade of grass that shot out of the ground with each swing of Finn's sword.

"Your magic is weak, and so are you!" Grassy Wizard shouted.

Switching sword hands, Finn grabbed one of the blades of grass with his metal hand before it could retreat back into the ground. And after slicing the other blade of grass, landed a high kick into the Grassy Wizard's face, knocking the fat wizard onto his back.

"Ahhhh!" Grassy Wizard sat up and brought his hands to his bloody face. "You broke my nose!"

"I'm gonna break a whole lot more if you don't leave these Nymphs alone," Finn warned.

"Wait, wait, wait!" Grassy Wizard shouted fearfully. "How…how about if you side with me? I can give you a new sword! Made of grass! And possessing incredible power, making you the most skilled swordsman in all of-"

Without warning, Grassy Wizard swung his hand and a blade of grass the size of a dagger shot out of the ground at Finn.

Finn simply side-stepped out of the way. And as the grass projectile flew past him, Finn ran up and slammed his metal fist into Grassy Wizard's mouth. GW cried out in pain and spat out a bloody tooth.

"If you don't leave, I will smite you," said Finn. "And if you ever come back, I'll have my friend the Huntress Wizard deal with you."

"Huntress…" Grassy Wizard gulped loudly. "You…you'll pay for this! You will!" The fat wizard sank beneath the grass and made off like a mole.

"There we go." Finn sheathed his sword and turned around. "How was that?"

"Awesome! Good job, Finn!" Flame Princess turned to Daphne. "You and the others can relax now. He's not coming back."

"That's…great…but…" Daphne looked down at her stomach,

where the Grassy Wizard's blade of grass had sunk three-quarters of the way into.

Phoebe gasped in horror. "...Daphne?"

Daphne dropped to the ground. Phoebe tried to catch her, but the contact just made the both of them cry out in pain. Daphne fell onto her back. Her breathing became shallow and her waterfall hair lessened as if someone had turned the knob and weakened the flow.

The other Water Nymphs gathered near Daphne at the lake's edge, all of them looking heartbroken and scared. Two of the Nymphs came out of the lake, one of them knelt down and rested Daphne's head on her lap, while the other one examined the grass blade stuck in Daphne's naval in the vain hope of being able to do something about it.

"No. No, no, no, no, no." Phoebe knelt down next to Daphne, looking straight-up broken. "...Mom?"

Daphne smiled weakly at Phoebe. "It was…nice to meet you, Phoebe. I'm…glad I was able to."

Tears of fire ran down the Princess's face. She took care not to let them fall onto Daphne.

Finn, staying quiet and still, stood and observed with a look of utter shame, fear, and pain.

"Tragic, isn't it?"

Startled, Finn spun around and grabbed for his sword. Standing next to him, suddenly appearing as if out of nowhere, was some kind of skeleton. His clothes were pale and tan, looking like something a gardener would wear, especially with the pale, wide-brimmed hat and the gloves he wore. To add to the gardener look, he held a wooden, zen garden rake in one hand. His skull was the weirdest thing about him. Instead of a human skull, it looked more like a horse's skull.

"I mean, I've seen it countless times." The skeleton's voice was deep and a tad gravelly. More calming than it was threatening. "But, even so, you never really get used to it."

"Who the ham are you?" Finn asked.

The skeleton looked into Finn's eyes, who felt a cold chill run down his spine from his gaze.

"I am Death."

"D…death?" Finn asked. "So, you're like…the Grim Reaper?"

"Haven't been called that in a while. But yeah, that's me."

"But…where's your black cloak?" Finn asked. "And your scythe? How come you have a rake instead?"

"Oh my glob, you guys still remember that?" Death ran a hand down his bony face in frustration. "Okay, look. For your information, that was a long time ago. I was young, I was going through a phase, I was…I was trying to impress a girl…"

Death shook his head. "You know what? Not important. I'm here for her." He pointed at Daphne.

"What? No!" Flame Princess stepped between Death and her mother. "I won't let you!"

"Death cannot be stopped. It can only be delayed," said Death. "And her time has come."

"Not today, it hasn't!" Finn drew his sword and slashed at Death.

The blade went right through Death as if he wasn't even there.

Finn blinked. "What the?"

"You wield Billy's blade," Death commented. "He's doing great, by the way. He's quite proud of his successor."

"Really? No kidding?" Finn asked.

"Finn!" Phoebe shouted.

"Sorry! Sorry!" Finn readied for another attack. "You're not taking Daphne!"

"Uh, yeah I am. She's dying," Death said as if it were obvious. "Look, she's a Water Nymph. Odds are, she'll be reincarnated as a fish for a lily flower or something like that. It's not all that bad."

"NO!" Phoebe erupted in flames, taking on a devilish appearance, and blasted Death with a geyser of fire.

When the flames died down, Death was standing in the exact same position, appearing to not even have flinched.

Death sighed and shook his head. "Freakin' red-heads. Glob damn." He raised his hand and snapped his fingers.

Phoebe's fire suddenly went out like a candle. She fell to her knees, suddenly looking exhausted. Her complexion was now paler than usual.

"Phoebe!" Finn growled and charged at Death.

Death swung his rake casually as if it were a croquet mallet and knocked Finn aside with the force of a battle ram.

Finn rolled across the ground to a stop, suddenly overwhelmed with pain. "...Ow."

"Yeah, that's not gonna work," said Death. "Alright, Daphne, you ready to go?"

"I…I am," Daphne replied weakly. "Just…please…stop hurting my daughter and her boyfriend."

Daphne calling Phoebe her daughter was enough to almost make the Princess cry as she struggled to find the strength to stand back up.

Death nodded. "Okay, then. Let's-"

"Wait!" Finn struggled back onto his feet. "Please! There's gonna be something we can do!"

"Nah, the knife is pretty deep in there," said Death. "I'm sorry, kid, but it's her time."

"What if…can't we just pay you off or something?" Finn asked.

"I am absolutely offended you would assume that I can be bribed," Death said. "But yeah, you totally can."

Finn blinked. "Seriously?"

"Sure, how much you got on you?"

"Um…" Finn sheathed his sword and patted his pockets. He didn't actually have any money on him. The only form of currency he had was…

Finn's eyes widened, then he closed them and let out a sad sigh. Finn took out the golden coin Sarah had given to him on his birthday, the one he always carried around with him.

Finn showed Death the coin. "Will this do?"

Death's eyes widened at the coin. "Oooooo, a gold one-dollar piece." He scratched the bottom of his skull thoughtfully. "A relic of the past. Holds sentimental value. In good condition. It would be perfect for my collection."

Death nodded. "Yeah, yeah. That'll do."

Finn tossed Death the gold coin. He watched glumly as Death put the coin in his pocket. 'Sorry, Sarah.'

"Sweet." Death turned to Daphne. "Now then."

Death walked up to the gravely injured Water Nymph. He knelt down and, without preamble, pulled the grass blade out of Daphne's stomach, earring a cry of pain from the Nymph as her injury and even her bathing suit mended. Her hair resumed its healthy flow and Daphne seemed to regain her energy.

"There we go, good as new." Death stood back up and snapped her fingers at Phoebe. Her body got back her healthy glow and she stood back up with her strength returned.

Daphne stood up off the ground. Phoebe went to her and they looked like they were about to hug it out. But they stopped themselves when they remembered what happened the last two times. Cleary disappointed and a bit embarrassed, they both just rubbed their arms and hung their heads.

"I'm so happy you're okay," said Phoebe.

"Yeah, me too," said Daphne. "Dying hurts."

The two of them shared a laugh, smiling happily at each other.

"I'm so thrilled that my daughter is as cool as you," Daphne said. "I'm sorry I was never a part of your life. I wish I had been able to be."

Phoebe beamed, looking like she was about to cry again. "It's fine. I'm just glad I finally get the chance to get to know you. And besides, even if you did somehow know about me, I still don't think we could have done anything about it."

"Yeah, I suppose not," Daphne agreed. "What I wouldn't give to be able to just hug you."

Finn looked at Death. "...Could you…?"

Death sighed. "Okay, fine. But only because I know what my girl would say to me if I didn't." Death walked up to FP. "Hold still, Princess."

"What are you-"

Death raised his hand and booped FP's nose. The Princess suddenly became encased in some kind of translucent, second skin. It covered her entire body as if a bubble had closed in on her. Except for the top of her head, where her fiery hair burned upward like it were in a chimney. Phoebe poked her arm curiously, testing the second skin. The way it felt was like a gel coating.

"There, you can't burn no one no more for the next twelve hours," Death said. "Go crazy."

Phoebe looked over at Daphne. She walked up to the Nymph and, very carefully, placed her hand on her arm. Nothing happened.

Phoebe and Daphne both grinned happily. They then embraced each other tightly, holding on to each other and enjoying the contact.

Finn observed as Phoebe was finally able to hug her mother. Both of them looked incredibly happy. As happy as Finn was for his girlfriend, he couldn't help but feel a certain amount of melancholia, which continued to grow as Phoebe and Daphne hugged.

Death walked up next to Finn. "...Life is a beautiful, yet brief thing," he said. "No one has forever."

Finn looked over at Death questioningly.

Death chuckled. "I'll see you soon enough, Finnegan Campbell. Hopefully, your life will be more fulfilling than Shoko's." He turned around and walked away. "Oh, and, next time you see him, tell Peppermint Butler I said hey. Glob, I love that guy."

Finn had no idea how Death knew Peppermint Butler, but at the moment he didn't really care. He just watched as Phoebe hugged her mom…wishing with all of his heart that he could hug his own mom.

Shoko appeared by Finn's side. Feeling his distress, she leaned against Finn's side to comfort him.

"My mom sold my arm, then she and my dad sold me," she said. "Imagine how much this stings for me."

(Later that night)

"Hey, thanks for letting me crash at your place, man," Jake said as he got into the dresser drawer.

"No problem, man," Finn said as he crawled into bed. "What did you do this time?"

"Ah, Lady had a box of candy that she brought back from the Crystal Dimension," Jake said. "She had them in the top cabinet. I found them. And then…well…"

"You ate them?" Finn guessed.

Jake laughed. "Yeah. Lady was maaaaaaaad." Jake rested his head on his hand. "So, what was up with Flame Princess? You're telling me her mom is a Water Nymph? Wow, talk about ironic. Or, poetic, or…some stuff."

"Oh, yeah. The whole thing was just nuts," Finn said. "I had to fight off a jerky grass wizard, and then when Phoebe's mom got injured, I tried to fight off Death, then I just bribed him with an old coin I got for my birthday."

"Dang, dude," Jake said.

"Right?" Finn asked. "Anyway, goodnight, Jake."

"Goodnight, buddy," Jake replied as Finn turned off the lamp. Finn and Jake got comfy and closed their eyes.

"...Hey, Jake?"

"Yeah, man?"

"...What was your mom like?"

"My mom?" Jake asked. "Ah, heck, she was the best. Sweetest woman in the world. She was occasionally overprotective, but she was one tough mama dog."

"If…if you could see her again…what would you tell her?" Finn asked.

Jake took a moment to think. "...I'd probably just tell her I love her," he said after the pause.

"That's all you would tell her?" Finn asked.

"That's all I would need to tell her," Jake said. "That, and, I miss her, I guess."

"Huh," said Finn.

"Hey, man. Peebles is gonna set up that communication link, and you'll be able to tell your mom everything you need to tell her," Jake said. "Don't worry."

"Yeah." Finn nodded. "...Yeah."

"Okay. Goodnight, buddy," Jake said. "I'm making breakfast in the morning."

An hour passed. By then, Jake was fast asleep, snoring away. Finn, on the other hand, was still awake, staring up at the ceiling.

When he couldn't take it anymore, he got out of bed and, moving quietly so he didn't wake up Jake, changed into his clothes and tiptoed away.

Traveling through the forest at night probably wasn't the smartest idea, regardless of the situation. Nevertheless, Finn made his way through the woods, with only the full moon illuminating the surrounding area around him. He followed the river and came to the clearing on the cliff.

Finn walked up to Huntress Wizard's home and knocked on the vines that barred the entrance.

"Huntress!" Finn shouted as he pounded his fist on the wooden bars. "Huntress! You still awake?! I need to talk to you about-"

Finn wasn't able to finish that sentence when a vine wrapped around his ankle and lifted him up into the air as if he had stepped on a large snare trap. Finn hung upside down in front of the entrance, suddenly feeling a sense of deja vu.

Finn closed his eyes and sighed. When he reopened his eyes, he let out a startled shout to see Huntress Wizard suddenly standing in front of the now-open entrance. She was barefoot and wasn't wearing her hooded cape, letting her leafy hair free. Her annoyed, green eyes glowed in the dark like a cat's did.

"I don't consider myself to be a nocturnal predator, Finn," HW said. "I actually enjoy sleeping."

"Look, I know it's late, but I need to talk to you," Finn said, still upside down, "I want to ask for another favor."

"Yeah? What, are you looking for a wild game side dish to go with your flambe?" Huntress Wizard shrugged. "Because…that honestly might be something I could be talked into."

"Shut up, Shoko," Finn quickly said.

"I didn't say anything," Shoko said, standing next to Finn.

"You were about to."

"I totally was, yeah."

Finn sighed. "Look, Huntress, I need your help with something. Something that…I honestly don't think I can go to anyone else for help with. You can chalk up as many favors as you want, I just really need to do this."

Huntress tilted her head and raised an eyebrow. "Do what? What do you want my help with?"

Finn took a deep breath. "...I need to go back to Founder's Island."

Until next time.