She wasn't sure why it surprised her that her cowboy would come running, or galloping right across the landscape. Lisa had taken a walk to try and gather her thoughts and maybe even clear her head. She'd walked to the pond and was now back at the barn standing at the fence watching the few horses that were outside and in the vicinity for the day. Something about horses calmed her. Most people assumed horses were just animals, but Lisa had grown up with them and knew they were much more than that. They all had unique personalities, and they could sense different emotions in people. Horses had a way of bonding with people, and she had certainly seen that lately with her expensive racehorse, Platinum Bow.

Lisa didn't know how long she'd been standing there with her foot on the fence, watching the horses. Her mind had certainly wandered when she heard Jack and turned to see him thundering toward her on his horse. If that didn't melt her heart, she didn't know what did. It reminded her of the last time he'd done that, a year ago when she'd returned from work travels, and Jack had ridden to the front door like her knight in shining armor to greet her. This time, like the last, she could tell he was headed to the house, but he spotted her at the fence and immediately started to slow Blue and turn Blue toward the barn.

"Whoa," he said quietly to Blue as the pair slowed to a stop right there by Lisa. Jack tipped his hat to her and dismounted from his horse in one quick motion, still surprising Lisa how agile he was, at least on his horse, for his age. Lisa couldn't help but let out a half chuckle, half sob as her cowboy now stood in front of her. Of course, he would come to her rescue.

"What's wrong?"

Lisa sighed, "Jack, you didn't have to come in from the field."

He pursed his lips as he moved to stand in front of her. Lisa watched as he took off his work gloves and reached to grasp her elbow, his eyes meeting hers.

"I can count on one hand the number of times I've been out working and have gotten a message from you like I just did. That's saying a lot for what, 17 years. You and I both know you tend to keep things to yourself, especially if something is bothering you, so when you say something's come up and you need to talk to me, and I'm most definitely sure I've done nothing to be in the dog house, well," he said with a nod and a sad smile, "I'm going to come help my wife with whatever she needs. Add to that, you are out here, a place you like to come to collect your thoughts. Now, tell me, what's wrong?"

She sighed and took a deep breath as she closed her eyes. She opened them to find Jack's dark eyes studying her, and she pursed her lips and gave him a sad nod, "I love you, you know that?"

"I know," he said quietly, his hand running over her elbow. "Feeling is mutual." Jack, a man of few words often with Lisa, then waited. He waited for her to say more.

She took a deep breath, "It's Dan." Instantly, she noted his face changed, and before he said something probably unkind but also probably deserving of Dan, she held up her hand and saw that his facial movement paused. She continued with a deep breath, her eyes locking with his, "Dan's dead."

The instant change on Jack's face told her he was just as surprised as he was with the news. Jack shook his head slightly, "Dead? Dan? He's," Jack gestured, and Lisa nodded, the nonverbal between them expressing the same ideas.

"I know, he's not that old, 65. He's dead. I just spoke with his brother."

"Oh, Lise," he sighed, dropping his head and shaking it. She looked down too and in doing so, missed that he pulled her toward him. She inhaled deeply as he put his arms around her, her head resting right there over his heart. Lisa wrapped her arms around him and gripped him tightly. She inhaled all of the smells she was so used to with Jack-horse, hay, outdoors. It was hard to describe, but something about just being there with Jack holding her tightly grounded her and gave her the strength to tackle anything.

"What happened?" Jack asked quietly, now running his hands up and down her back. That had always been comforting to her. With his height, it was easy for him to rest his head on top of hers, and she cherished that familiarity right now. Lisa turned her head sideways so she could answer while still maintaining that close contact.

"Ahh, he had a massive heart attack." Jack's hands stilled at that, and she knew that telling Jack Dan had died of a heart attack would suck the wind out of him. Her instincts were right. Jack stood there, now frozen on the spot, his hands stilled, and Lisa pulled back from their tight embrace to look up at him, not even trying to hide the tears that were welling up in her eyes. Jack met her gaze, and he wiped at her eye for her.

"A heart attack?"

Lisa nodded, biting her lip, "Ahh, he was playing polo, had a heart attack on his horse, and his brother said the doctors believe Dan was probably dead before he hit the ground. Multiple attempts to revive him were unsuccessful."

Jack nodded, his expression turning stone-faced. Lisa looked up at him, and she could see he tried to shake off anything he was thinking and locked eyes on her.

"I am sorry to hear that, even with as much as I don't like Dan. Never want to wish that on anyone. How are you? It's quite a shock."

"It is," she sighed, now, pushing back from their close embrace, still holding his hand and gathering herself. She shook her head, "To tell you the truth, I'm not sure what to think."

He nodded, now pulling her into his side. He put his arm around her shoulders and kissed the side of her head. He gestured toward the house, indicating they should walk there together. She nodded, both very good at nonverbal gestures with the other. Before they started for the house, Jack broke contact with her and turned to tend to Blue, wrapping the reigns around the hitching post. He could deal with him later; the horses were sometimes left there briefly, and he turned back and clasped Lisa's hand in his as the two walked.

"You haven't spoken to Dan in some time, have you?"

Lisa, tightening the grip on Jack's hand as they walked, shook her head, "No, ahh, I was telling Richard, that's Dan's brother, the same thing. I haven't spoken to him in at least a couple years. He sent a card when Bow won the Derby, but I hadn't spoken to him in person or anything in at least that long. My trips to France have been less and less, and I've not seen him there in some time. His brother said he was living in Florida now, which I had thought he was, but honestly, it has been nice not having him lurking about in Hudson the last few years. We'd finally rid ourselves of him and his schemes."

Jack nodded, listening to Lisa, and as the two approached the porch, he walked them around to the side, by the door to their bedroom where there were two chairs. That was a favorite spot, one that afforded a little more privacy than the bench on the front porch. He gestured for Lisa to sit, and as she did, she watched Jack pull his chair closer. He sat in it but was leaning forward, his hands on her knees as she sat there collecting her thoughts. Lisa could see Jack was studying her face, trying to get an idea of the turmoil going on in her head.

"Talk to me, Lise," he encouraged, "just keep talking." Lisa glanced at him and saw a look of concern and also one of empathy on his face. He squeezed at her knees, and she leaned forward slightly, missing the closer contact. She clasped her hands on her lap and looked at them as she tried to explain.

"I'm not sure what to even think. I mean, I feel terrible that he's died, but it's still so surreal too. I mean, it's Dan. Dan shouldn't be," she paused, almost unable to say it and then did, "dead. In some ways, I still see the 27-year-old version of Dan I met after college when I was working with my dad. I still see him the first time I met him. I was learning the business from Dad, tagging along to a horse auction down in Kentucky. Dan was there with his uncle, who owned a ranch in Kentucky. I've told you that less than a year later we were married, and less than five years later, we were divorced." She shook her head again, sighing.

"I'm here, Lise," Jack said reaching for her clasped hands. He put his on top of hers, and when she glanced at him, he offered a sad smile. "We both know I've struggled with the ghosts of Lyndy over the years, and while this is a little different, you were still married to him. There are feelings there, even if some of those feelings are you wanting to strangle him and me wanting to hog tie him for everything he put you through."

Lisa let a choked up laugh escape at Jack's description, nodding as she did. She was quiet for a few moments, collecting her thoughts again. When she looked up, her expression had changed, just as the emotions of all of this were hitting here in spurts. Now, she was frustrated.

"You know what Richard said?" Lisa looked to Jack, knowing he would have no idea, and when he gave her a slight shake of the head, she continued, pulling her hands from his grasp to gesture wildly. "He said that Dan told him a year ago he was still in love with me. . ," she stated it slowly with intent and shook her head at Jack. "What? He wasn't in love with me when we were married. I figured that out pretty quickly. The only thing Dan has ever been in love with is money and getting his hands on more of it. I can't believe he would have told Richard that. What was he thinking? He's always been after me, not because he loved me, but because he saw some big scheme and payday. I am so mad about that."

Jack's expression was unreadable. He nodded as she spoke, and she heard him let out a long sigh. He pulled her hands back into his grasp again after she'd finished her rant, and Lisa looked to their joined hands where he was rubbing his thumbs over her hands. Jack spoke quietly next, "I can't imagine that conversation went like you expected."

"No," she sighed, her face still focused on their hands. She let out a long sigh as well and shook her head, "I told Richard there was no way I believed that about Dan."

"Sounds like Dan was delusional," Jack offered, with almost a slight chuckle in his tone. Lisa eyed him, and she let out a low chuckle herself.

"You and I are quite the pair because that was the exact word I used with Richard. When he told me Dan had professed some long-lost-love, I told Richard Dan sounded delusional. He was if he was trying to claim he still loved me."

"Was Richard surprised by your reaction?"

"Yes," she huffed. She shook her head and looked to Jack again, rolling her eyes, "I told him Dan was delusional because he knew you and I had been married for over 10 years. I told Richard I have been very happy with you the last 17 years, and Dan knew that, so there was no way I believed anything about this long-lost-love claim."

The two settled into silence, and finally, Jack tugged at Lisa's hand. She tilted her head and gave him a soft smile, knowing he was prodding her to move.

"You and I are both too old for me to sit there with you," she nodded. "And, I'm not the thin little thing you remember. I just keep getting older and fatter."

He rolled his eyes and tugged at her arm again. She sighed, but she moved and settled in the chair with him, putting her head on his shoulder as she sat sideways across his lap. He rested his hand on her knee and spoke quietly to her.

"I'm sure you have a lot of emotions flowing right now. Just talk to me, anytime, anywhere. You know you'll get a pretty good response from me if you text me." Lisa let out a small laugh at that while Jack continued to rub his thumb over her knee. He put his other hand up under her hair on her neck and rested it there, squeezing her shoulder in comfort. "I am sorry, Lise, sorry for all of it, for this news today, for all of the memories and emotions to come, because as much as you wanted nothing to do with him, he was a big part of your life, even if you weren't married that long. Those emotions don't just go away."

"I know, and I appreciate you saying that. I'll be okay."

"You'll bottle things up," he told her. "I know that, and I don't want you to do that again."

She sighed, "The last thing I want to do is sit here and tell you stories about a man who I thought was some true love but I grew to loathe."

He shifted his head to meet her gaze, "I need to hear what you are thinking, just like we don't have to talk about it this second, but I know you, and I know that you've already thought about the similarities here-Dan and I both had heart attacks-"

Lisa shook her head and cut him off, "Yeah," she said, her voice wavering, "you're right. I don't want to talk about that or think about that, not right now." She rested her head there on his heart and said quietly, "You're here with me, right now, and I am so very grateful for that, each and every day. Today, it just is a reminder of how quickly life can change, and I cherish that you and I had a second chance. I don't want to talk about that though," she sat up, looking at him, "at least not right now."

Jack nodded, and the two settled into silence, both processing things in their own ways. Jack started running his hand up and down Lisa's back, and she felt herself start to relax and let go of some of the tension she had. Emotions and memories were flooding through her head. She didn't want that right now, but she couldn't shake them. She felt Jack tighten his grip on her, and she wrapped one arm around his ribs, gripping at him as much as he was gripping at her.

Dan was dead, a man she had given her heart to so many years ago. She didn't love him now and hadn't in a very, very long time, but she had, even if it was briefly, and even if she'd had to come to terms with the fact that Dan hadn't loved her, not in the same way. She didn't want to get into more with Jack right now, but this was not something she had expected to have to sort through now, here.

Jack was here, her Jack, Jack the man she truly couldn't imagine going through life without. She gripped him tightly again, knowing that life could be taken away in an instant. Right now, she wanted to try and be present in the moment, so appreciative she still had Jack, and while it felt odd to express, right now, she didn't want to think about Dan and what had been.