Curses! My passions were too fierce by far! Once again Bella has been my undoing! Three days have now passed since that fateful afternoon.
After another dull affectation of lunch, Emmett with his dozen eggs and I with a wilted slice of hot garbage purchased from the oleaginous cafeteria trolls, I repaired to the auditorium for my presentation. The acne-spotted cohort shuffling clumsily into their seats, burping and blathering about some idle gossip, as I waited in the wings. I placed my carefully crafted Driver's License Amnesty Box by the exit. Then it was time.
I stepped to the podium, startled by the spotlight's glare and searched squinting into the crowd for the one face I cared to gaze upon. Bella! My angel was centered directly before me and wore a delicate blush as her eyes raised to meet mine. What rapture in that sweet second! I was filled with what google tells me was an 'adrenaline rush'. My hands trembled, with lust for my Bella and anticipation for this shining moment before me.
Then things started a rapid, keening descent into ruin. The microphone whistled. I feared the tremors of my hands might distract me, so I shoved my hands into my pockets in what proved to be a fatal error. My keys rattling against my leg as Bella shot me a tiny smile and then my immortal body betrayed me. I suppose the vibrations from my pockets and the sight of Bella must have been too much, I was overcome with lust and before I knew it, it was painfully obvious.
Now trapped behind the podium for what could be days if not hours, I was assaulted by the thoughts of the wearied audience "Cullen looks like he's going to have an aneurysm." "I bet he passes out", "His bouffant is trembling" and, from the back where Rosalie and Emmett had snuck in, "For fuck's sake, Edward!" and the haunting refrain of Las Ketchup.
Some seconds mush have passed, so I felt it prudent to begin, despite being under great duress, my driver safety presentation. My voice was suddenly too quiet, then too loud, my voice cracked, my words stuttered and stalled. Much internal screaming followed. I wrapped things up quickly, inexplicably shooting finger guns at the audience before darting across the stage at a barely passable human speed, sadly not fast enough to hide the notable turgescence in my nether regions. I took cover where I first found it and there I remain.
On this, my third day hiding underneath the stage, my new dark and dusty domicile, I continue to await the coming school vacation, when I shall finally be able to emerge and make one final journey, to Volterra. Just three and a half more weeks to go.
A/N: Please leave a review! Las Ketchup: /5llcBScGuAE just so, so awful. One of Emmett's playlist staples. What other terrible music do you think he likes?