…Surrogate…

Author's note/Warning: This is a Yaoi story as in male x male. The pairing is Steve Rogers X Tony Stark. If it offends you, you might want to turn back now. For those that don't mind that, I hope you enjoy the story. All reviews are appreciated.

/Warning/: This is a dark story that takes a place in the MCU timeline to some extent, but with many major changes such as Steve Rogers is not Captain America, instead it is Peggy Carter. This chapter contains: cursing, violence, darkness, and mention of major character illness, mention of child negligence and an underline abusive behavior; home invasion, major character death, death and blood, mental breakdown; a lot of mental health issues, and the most important dark Tony Stark!

Disclaimer: I will only say this once. I don't own anything and make no profit from this story.

Chapter 1

Tony never thought he would see him again…

.

…

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…Until he found him…

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…

Tony Stark had always hated his parents… well, he didn't hate Hate them per se, but he didn't like them either; especially his mean father who spent his days putting Tony down and glaring at him like he was the reason that everything bad in the world was happening because of him. But that was another matter completely, what matters the most, is that Tony doesn't like his parents… it was not a silly thing caused by his parents ignoring him constantly (Which they did) or that they didn't buy him what he wanted whenever he wanted (Which was all the time but Tony was not someone who cared about anything that he saw, because he knew he could make something even better) or because his mother can't stand to gaze at him too long without a little bit of pain and jealousy clouding her eyes; it was not even because of his father continuously putting him down and telling him how stupid and annoying he was, even when he managed to invent his circuit board at the age of three. No, not at all, because those were things that Tony didn't care about, especially, when he didn't care about his parents enough to notice how real biological parents should act like… he had Jarvis and Anna so why would he care? The real reason why Tony hated his parents so much was because they never allow him to see him… the older teen who turned out to be his older brother.

For as long as Tony lived (Which was not much if you counted his four years before meeting his brother) Tony didn't know why his parents wouldn't allow him to see his older brother or play with him; especially, when the teen was so much fun and he would always brighten up and give Tony such happy smiles when he sees him (Smiles that made the five years old all gooey and warm on the inside) before he beckoned Tony into his bed so the two of them can play or tell stories. He didn't know why his parents kept his older brother in his room without letting him out unless they want to take him to the doctor, or when Aunt Peggy came into their home (Which was the only time that Tony can play with his brother freely without fearing his father's anger, which would make his brother overprotective of him that he would stress and risk falling sick, making everyone worry about him).

Back then, it used to make Tony think that his older brother had done something wrong and got punished for it; if it wasn't for his father and his mother being all soft and gentle with his brother, even kissing him, hugging, and ruffling his hair, while doing what he wanted… Tony would have thought his brother was like him… a burden… Tony always thought it was odd, that all his older brother did was sleep in his room day and night and do nothing, and still, by the end of the day, he got both of their parents' love… something that used to make Tony jealous and angry when he was younger, but that silly feeling had long since gone away when he realized later, that everything was happening because his brother was so sick that any day now, his heart may stop and he would have to leave to be with God and leave them before he even reached the age of fifteen… or at least that's what Jarvis tried to explain, which made Tony frown harshly in deep thoughts.

Tony remembered that one night he decided to finally meet his brother; how he spent his whole day thinking about inventing something that would help his brother's heart continue to beat so he wouldn't leave and go be with God; thinking that if he succeeded in doing so then his parents would love him just like they loved his older brother and maybe even more. That night he remembered sneaking into his brother's room, knowing that if his parents knew about this he would get spanked and yelled at by his father, but knowing well enough that if his plan worked, then it meant his brother won't go and leave them and that his parents would love Tony too. He remembered how he surprised his brother that night, causing the older teen to look up from his book in confusion and surprise when he noticed Tony walked slowly toward him… his head tilting to the side as he gave a confused 'Hello?' causing Tony to swallow as he studied the teen that his parents loved more than Tony… noticing his blue eyes, like their mother, and blond hair like the sun… if Tony had to say, he would have said that the teen in front of him was a copy of his mother, but he was paler and more tired than her... but still prettier...

"Here… I made you this… so you won't leave us…" Tony remembered whispering, suddenly feeling shy as he presented the teen in front of him with the silly invention that he worked on tirelessly… Tony didn't really have a clear idea in his mind when he made the small remote for his brother, just that he hoped the switch would help his brother's heart continue to beat and not stop.

"I… thank you…?" His older brother said slowly gazing at the remote in his hand before giving Tony a small smile albeit a confused one, making Tony feel shyer and warmer than he had been not a few seconds ago. "So you are Mr. Jarvis's son… right? Why don't you tell me about yourself, kid?" His older brother suddenly asked, patting the bed as he mentioned for Tony to climb up with him, causing Tony's eyes to widen in surprise and nervousness before he did what his older brother asked not noticing what his brother's words meant until much later, considering that he was feeling so nervous and excited to think that his first meeting with his older brother had gone well, and that the older boy wouldn't leave now, and that Tony did something right, and is it normal to feel like this around an adult who is older than you by ten years?

Tony remembered how his brother's eyes widen when he introduced himself, and how he stiffen when Tony told him why he came to give him the remote… he remember how still the older teen was, but how gentle his hands were running through Tony's hair as he listens to him and his blabber and later held him tightly, covering Tony with blankets as to not get cold while he sang him to sleep when it got too late…

That was the best night of sleep in Tony's short life, even when the next morning he was wakened up by his father and mother's angry voices as they demanded to know what Tony was doing there… Tony didn't know what happened after Jarvis rushed to take him outside of the room and prevent his father from hitting him, only that his older brother started screaming and shouting and throwing things at their parents while ignoring how they tried to calm him down before he hurt himself… Tony remembered feeling scared as tears gathered in his eyes, thinking that he had done something wrong when he was just trying to help…

Tony didn't know what happened, only that his parents came to him later and told him that his older brother wanted to meet him… Tony remembered being nervous as he followed his parents who were giving him angry looks that were wiped away as soon as they reached his older brother's room; when Tony entered the room, he remembered the relieved and happy smile his older brother gave him as he stood from the rocking chair near the window before walking to kneel in front of Tony and pull him into a tight hug… Tony remembered feeling so warm and tingly like there were many butterflies flying around in his stomach, and he remembered nearly jumping in happiness as his older brother told him to call him by his name… It was that day that Tony realized…

He was jealous not of his brother… but of his parents…

"…And then, Captain America dealt the final blow, defeating the evil Red Skull once and for all!" The teenager exclaimed in his best narrator voice while trying to take a heroic pose causing Tony to give a hushed giggle trying not to be loud and gain the attention of anyone walking down the halls at night; not wanting to be scolded once more for sneaking up into his brother's room and annoying him when the teen should be resting and not getting pestered by a hyper-excited five years old; especially when the said older brother had gone through a heart transplant surgery not a few months ago and shouldn't be stressed… a one of a kind surgery that his father paid millions to perfect and make it happen so that his oldest and most loved son wouldn't die.

"And then Captain America managed to land the plane safely and stopped the war!" Tony continued in a hushed voice as he shuffled and all but throw himself at his older brother, gaining a startled laugh as the older boy held into him tightly, maneuvering them with experience move until they were safely hiding under the covers. Ignoring the pout that dominated the child's face when the implication of the move finally caught up to him, instead of whining Tony snuggled into his brother's chest happily, finally feeling the sleepiness that he tried to banish away since he managed to sneak into his brother's room for the first time after weeks.

"Yeah… and then she stopped the war…" His older brother whispered, causing Tony to hum and clutch his shirt tightly; the calm and happy mood lasted until they dozed off, only to be startled awake by the harsh shouting from outside of the room, causing them both to tense (Tony more than his brother) and for the older teen to pull the whimpering child into his chest, hiding him with his body and putting his hands on Tony's ears in hope of the boy not hearing the nasty words coming from outside the room.

"He is a child! Of course, he will want to spend some time with his older brother, Howard; you know how the two of them get when they don't see each other!"

"I don't care, Maria! I specifically ordered Tony not to bother his brother today considering that his chest was hurting him! If the boy refuses to listen to simple orders then I will teach him to listen better next time!"

Tony whimpered as the harsh words and threats filtered through his older brother's hands, causing the teen to grit his teeth and pull him closer to his chest before he started to hum a soft song, trying to distract Tony from their shouting parents outside of the room. It took a while before the voices hushed down, and when Jarvis's harsh voice came through the door, his parents finally shut their mouths before a growl came from Howard, and the sound of stumbling feet faded into the background.

"One day… when you grow older… you will become better and stronger than Captain America…" His older brother suddenly said, causing Tony to sniffle and raise his head to gaze at his brother, whose eyes were gentle and his smile warm, causing Tony to sniffle even more and try to wipe his nose with the sleeve of his shirt before being stopped by his brother.

"How? Captain America has the Super Soldier Serum… I… I don't…" Tony mumbled, grumbling when his brother brought a tissue and wiped his nose with it, but nonetheless, he melted into his brother's embrace when the older boy pulled him to his chest.

"You have something that's even better than Captain America's serum… you have this…" His brother pointed to his chest, where his heart was. "And your most important weapon, this…" Pointing at Tony's head, to his brain, causing the boy's eyes to widen in awe, wondering if what his brother said was true. "You only had to follow a few simple rules…" At that Tony all but jump as he begged his older brother to tell him which he did. "No drinking… no drugs… no bullying people… and never ever back down from a fight." Tony's eyes widened, wondering if his brother knew about how his father gave him a glass of whiskey the other day and told him to drink it while laughing and calling him annoying when he couldn't.

When the rest of his brother's words made sense to him, Tony had to bite his lower lip as he glance at his brother from under his lashes, not trying to deny his brother's implication when the teen was giving him that look that told Tony his brother knew about what happened with their father. "But… but you will be with me when that happens… right?" Tony asked, his words gaining a smile as gentle blue eyes took him in.

"Of course… there is nowhere else, I will rather be…" His older brother cooed, snuggling into him and making Tony relax as he held his brother tightly, wondering what he can do to become better than Captain America and make his older brother proud of him… No drinking, no drugs, no bullying, and never backing down from a fight….

Tony thinks he can do that…

It was Christmas Eve when it happened… Tony woke up because he heard the sound of the backdoor breaking open downstairs, causing him to let out a confused noise, wondering if it was Santa, but at the same time being confused about why Santa would be so loud and end up breaking the backdoor… shouldn't he use the chimney as his older brother said? Tony ended up sitting in his bed, shifting slightly when he noticed that his room was dark, illuminated only by the harsh glint of moonlight. Swallowing Tony crept out of bed, his small feet walking silently on the carpeted floor, going to the stairs to look down over the banister, promising himself that he would only take a peek at Santa before returning back to his room; wondering if it was one of the servants returning back earlier from their vacations today instead of after the New Year… maybe it was Jarvis coming back because he forgot something?

Instead of seeing Santa or Jarvis as Tony expected, he saw five men, all wearing masks and holding guns, in their hands, causing Tony's heart to skip several beats at the sight as fear took hold of him. As silently as he can, Tony ran toward his brother's room, holding his whimpers at the thought of the scary men finding them; by a miracle, Tony had made it to his brother's room, all but jumping on the bed as he shook him awake, causing his older brother to grunt and turn to Tony with a tired smile that vanished as soon as he saw how pale and scared Tony was.

"Tony… why are you awake?" His older brother hugged him tightly, trying to calm him down, listening to Tony's rushed explanation, paling at the words he heard, swallowing as he could only say "Come…" Before lifting Tony into his hip and heading to their parent's bedroom; locking the door behind them and waking their parents up.

Tony can only climb into the bed, as he heard the sound of crashing as the intruders started up the stairs. "What do we do?" His brother whispered as he gazed around him, the windows were too high up for them to leave, and even the gun in his father's hand wouldn't be enough against five armed men.

Their mother turned to them with wide, terrified eyes when she noticed the landlines not working. "Hide…" Was all she could say, and his father looked like he wanted to argue, but then his brother mentioned that there are five of them, and they were all armed, a fact that caused fear to appear in his father's eyes, and that was enough to scare Tony because he never saw his father look like this.

So they hide… Tony went under the dresser, trying to make himself smaller than he already was, and his brother went under the bed; as for their parents, they hid in the wardrobe. It wasn't much later that two horrific gunshots were heard as the door is blown off its hinges, and Tony watched in the dark, shivering as he tried to hold in his whimpers when he saw the wardrobe doors flung open, and there were a few more gunshots before everything was silent.

Shaking, Tony turned to his brother whose eyes were wide, having seen what happened and was grinding his teeth together, he turns to see Tony, who was hugging his knees to his chest under the dresser, meeting his eyes. And Tony... Tony couldn't help but start crying as he saw the tears running down his older brother's face in the silver light… part of Tony couldn't comprehend what had just happened, but if his brave older brother was crying, then he should be crying too because there was no hope for them.

And his cries draw their attention, Tony nearly screamed when he saw his older brother let out a shout and jumped from under the bed at one of the armed men, snarling and shrieking as he kicked and scratched and punched; pulling them away from Tony and distracting them enough that they forgot about him… the action rending Tony silent and forced his tears to stop as he watches with wide terrified eyes, as the men held his brother down as he fought them with all he had, cursing them and hissing like a demon out of hell, gaining laughter from the men as they looked at one another, before one of them mutters something, much too quiet for Tony to hear, but years and years later, the small boy was sure they said something along the lines of 'We'll kill him later, can release a few loads into this one.' before they dragged his brother out of the room, leaving Tony to stay, under the dresser; biting his tongue so hard that it hurt.

For three days Tony stayed there, hiding under the dresser until he becomes desensitized to the smell of his parents' rotting flesh, until he crawled out, dehydrated and weak. Rubbing his eyes, he made his way to his father's study to get the special phone and call Aunt Peggy.

They never found his brother's body…

The years passed and the news about the Stark family massacre was long forgotten… only mentioned in passing as people gazed at the only surviving Stark with either pity for what he had gone through or with a dark glint in their eyes, wondering what can they do to get the billionaire genius that graduated MIT at the age of seventeen to their side. In all of that, Tony reminded desensitized to the people around him, trying to remind afloat as he held into what was left of his sanity and tried not to drown in the sea of guilt and pain… blaming himself daily for being the reason that his older brother had died when he could have survived if Tony just kept his mouth shut.

The years passed, and Tony continued his family's legacy, becoming the CEO of SI at the age of twenty-one, taking the company leaps forward and taking the world by storm. Making people fall left and right to their knees as they all but kissed his ass to be in his good grace, even when Tony would have preferred to be anywhere but here… so many nights Tony had to hold into his anger and later tears when he realized that he had stolen his older brother's future and position… His older brother was supposed to be the CEO of SI, not Tony… Tony was supposed to be the head of the R&D department, and the two of them were supposed to take the world by storm just like his father said when he was in one of his good moods.

The years passed, and Tony the rules his older brother gave him in hope of becoming even stronger and better than Captain America… No alcohol, no drugs, no bullying, and never backing down from a fight... become all but forgotten as Tony went on with his life as the Genius, Billionaire, Playboy, Philanthropist… drinking and doing drugs, and going through his dates as he goes through his shoes… Tony hated himself so much for breaking the rules his brother sat for him… he hated himself so much for not following through… but his brother was supposed to be by his side when he became the hero… so Tony tried to ignore that promise and go on with his life.

The years passed, and many people entered and left his life in a blink of an eye… Aunt Peggy was still around, coming from time to time to check in on him, even when he wanted nothing to do with the woman who couldn't find his brother or his body. Jarvis and Anna both had died years ago in a car accident leaving Tony alone to mourn the loss of his parents' figures, a wound that freshens his loss for his family all over again. Stane was still hovering over Tony's head, suffocating him with his high expectation as he all but sent Tony all over the world to do their presentation and encouraged him to let loose and enjoy himself while he can; an offer Tony all too happily took, because of his want to forget. Then there was Pepper, Rhodey, and Happy; the only friends that Tony had, and knew that they would have his back no matter what happened, even when the world would turn against him… Tony couldn't help but think that his brother would have loved those three if he had met them…

The years passed, and Tony nearly died multiple times… only stand up once more and discover the dark secrets followed by the betrayal; finally doing what his brother predicted all alone and becoming someone stronger and better than Captain America using his smarts and ironically his heart too… the years passed, and Tony finally confront his family's killer, only for that killer to turned out to be Stane, who laughed in front of him and his family happily only to send mercenaries behind their back and kill his parent and steal his brother away.

"Where is he?!" Tony remembered snarling as he all but pounded Stane's face into the ground, ripping and pulling the iron armor that encased his family's killer from the raging force that was Tony, who was taking his revenge on the person who stole his beloved brother away from him… stole the only person that Tony truly loved unconditionally and would have given his heart to if he had asked.

"He is dead! I made sure of that, just as I am going to make sure that you are going to meet him very soon… oh, and Tony? Your brother was so sweet and tight as he cried for us to stop…"

Those were the words that broke what was left of Tony's sanity and sealed Stane's fate as Tony screamed and shrieked and attacked like a maniac to destroy the person who had not only taken his brother away from him but had tortured and violated his beloved brother before death had claimed him…. when Peggy Carter came to the rescue, she found the building that used to be SI's research department burning to ashes in the ground with Tony standing in the middle wearing the armor he created… Stane was no more and no one managed to find the pieces that once upon a time made his body… for months after, Peggy looked at him with an unreadable look that spilled warily and caution every time she came near him, her view of him had changed as she started to consider him a potential enemy than her nephew… not that Tony discouraged her not when he promised himself to burn the world down for what they had done to him and his beloved brother.

The years passed, and just like his older brother predicted, Tony became a greater figure than Captain America as he took the world by storm as the superhero Iron Man; saving the world by the morning and planning its downfall by night as revenge for what they took from him, ignoring the fact that in doing so he would fall from the world's grace straight into limbo… not something that Tony cared about… not since he found himself trapped in this hell for thirty years and counting…

The years passed, and his brother was never found…

Walking down the street, Tony passed a smile on his face and waved to the fans as he walked around New York's streets, coming to check on the tower that was going to be the next Stark Tower… the headquarter for the next phase of his plan. Humming along the way as gazed at the building holding his name in the distance, walking until he finally reached the building that would start the future as a better one. From the corner of his eye, Tony saw a flash of gold, causing him to blink and turn his head to the side to see a coffee shop across from his tower; with nothing better to do and with a lot of free time on his hands, Tony shrugged as he decided to go in and buy some coffee for him and Pepper who was no doubt waiting for him inside the tower and planning to chew him for being late.

Entering the shop, Tony scrunched his nose at how crowded it was, but nevertheless, he stood in the line as he pulled his sunglasses down to hide his eyes, getting his phone out, to scroll through the files and convey to any curious bystander that he wasn't in the mood for their mindless chitchat and demand for autographs and it seemed to work as no one had dared to approach him. Something that made Tony relax for a split second, which turned out to be a mistake as some clumsy shit decided that this would be a great time to stumble into him, nearly drenching the sleeve of his suit jacket with coffee.

When Tony turned to snap at the idiot and give him a piece of his mind… words got stuck in his throat, when his brown eyes, fell on a sky blue (So blue) that were wide as they were taking him. "I am so sorry!" The man apologized in a melodic voice that forced Tony's breath to hitch and for his hand to shake when the ghost in front of him continued to apologize with a soft but nervous smile, before the man in front of him all but walked away, leaving Tony shaken and frozen in his place.

It was a minute later that Tony regain the function of his body; a minute that was as long as a century as Tony all but sprinted outside of the coffee shop trying to find the ghost that came to Tony so suddenly, and so unexpectedly that he turned his whole life upside down in the matter of a few seconds. It wasn't until a few minutes later that Tony managed to spot the blond hair in the crowd and he rushed to catch up to the man before he once again, disappeared from Tony's life, leaving him to try and glue the broken pieces of his sanity that refused to stay together.

Helpless, Tony watched as the person got farther and farther away, as New York's traffic worked hard to separate the two of them once more. "Steve!" Tony couldn't help but cry out, hoping that his brother would stop and turn back after hearing his name. "Steve, wait!" Tony called out once more, almost letting a sob when the blond man stopped and looked around, no doubt trying to find the person who was calling his name. Before Tony managed to cross the road to the other side and fall in his beloved brother's arms, cars start honking as the lights turned green, successfully separating Tony and forcing him to stay frozen in his place as the ghost on the other side once more vanished from his life leaving Tony reeling from what his eyes just witnessed.

Tony doesn't know how long he stood frozen in his place, gazing at the spot that the ghost was in before disappearing once more, but he knew it was long enough that the lights turned red before turning green once more. When Tony regain control of himself, he could only back away on shaky legs and lean on the building behind him, trying to make sense of what he saw and felt not a few minutes ago… when everything started to make sense and his mind started to whirl with the many possibilities and plans that came into him… Tony couldn't help but laugh, and laugh, and laugh… until tears start streaming down his face and his heart hurt so much that he thought it would stop or that one of the shrapnel managed to reach it and shred it apart. A huge grin took over Tony's face the whole way back to the tower as his fingers twitched uncontrollably at the truth that presented itself… thirty years, and now Tony knew why his brother's body was never found… thirty years of pain and grieve and his brother was alive all this time… thirty years wasted because Tony didn't factor in his brother's stubbornness to escape his captors… thirty years…

And Tony finally found his Steve once more…

So what do you think?

I am alive!

And how did I celebrate?

By posting a new story and ignoring my other thousand ones that needed to be updated ^-^'

This story was written a long time ago and was supposed to be published in October, but life, college, and writer's block had to middle once more, forcing me to postpone posting and writing until now… I will try to return back to writing and see how everything goes…

Wish me Luck!

Read and Review

And tell me what you think…

Nazaki-Sama