Buying Christmas gifts this year has felt more purposeful, but also has caused me more anxiety than in any other year I can remember. I have much to apologise and give thanks for, so I put more effort in than usual.
I got Rosalie and Emmett a couple's spa break, as I know they both really enjoy relaxing like that together. Emmett will need to calm down after what we have planned for New Year! Ha ha!
I got Jasper a new lens for his camera, Alice VIP tickets to the Dior show ar New York Fashion Week and Carlisle a dictaphone, leather bound journals and some books about how to write your memoirs. For Esme I bought a rare orchid that I had to have specially imported. Everyone seemed very pleased with their presents and it was nice to give for the first time and share in their joy, rather than feel begrudging and bitter as I typically have.
Naturally, I ruminated the most over what to get Bella. As much as I would love to replace her truck, buy her a top of the line laptop, or give her an enormous trust fund, I know her well enough now that I know those gifts would be rejected and would make her feel incredibly uncomfortable too.
We have had quite the journey these past months and it has been hard to know what is appropriate, but I settled upon a few items that I found meaningful and I hope she does too, rather than anything expensive or flashy. Holding back was my main problem, I want to give her the entire world, it was very difficult not to get carried away.
I gave her a book on meditation and another on the history of Chicago, writing on the tag 'I have learned so much of my past and future thanks to you", I also gave her the bone page turner and magnifying glass that belonged to my mother and wrote 'this was my mothers but I want you to have it, because you helped me see things in a new way by looking closer'. I framed the costal landscape watercolour of mine that she had admired when I showed her it a few weeks ago, on the back I wrote 'For Bella, the bravest person I have ever met'. Finally, I wrapped up her mended green fountain pen and attached a note to it saying 'It took a while, but I found it for you'.
I hope my gifts are not too sentimental and do not make Bella feel uncomfortable, I am nervous about her opening them today and have been checking my phone anxiously since last night when Alice dropped them off, waiting to see if Bella will text me.
Bella said I would have to wait for my gift because she needed to drive to go Christmas shopping and of course her wrist is injured, I told her not to go to all that bother and I didn't expect a gift from her.
A/N: Please leave a review! Thanks so much to my wonderful beta wh1teow1, please show some love and read Moirai, a reimagining of Twilight for the new decade! There is a picture of Edward's mother's page turner and costal watercolour on my Deviant Art page, just search for LogLadyJ, they're in the featured gallery. 8 entries left to go!