I crept through Bella's window for another sleepover. Sometimes I find myself hissing at the daylight, willing it to go away, so that I may once again wrap up Bella in her blankets beside me and kiss her until she falls asleep. Curse the daytime! And double curse school!
After our interrupted kisses in the blanket fort I haven't tried to invite Bella over again. Perhaps I can shoo my family away somehow? Though if the three (3!) flies which now seem to have taken up permanent residence in the Cullen hone remain unextinguished for much longer the family may decide to relocate anyway, leaving just the five of us, Bella, myself and the awful, awful flies, to something closer to solitude than we are able to currently secure.
Bella's house has the advantage of being fly free, but the disadvantage of her father's watchful presence, meaning I have to sneak in and out and we can only speak in whispers. Still, even with the thoughts of her father, the neighbours and some of the most dim witted pets I have ever heard, her space is significantly more peaceful than my own.
Bella confessed that she likes me a great deal tonight! It made me so happy to hear. She said she would like me and want to be my girlfriend even if I smelled bad, or lost my hair (not to self: ask Jeeves about vampires and male pattern baldness), even if I told bad jokes (thank goodness I only ever tell very good ones), even if my family hated her, or even if I was bad at kissing (she promised me she likes my kisses. Yes!), or even if I believed in mermaids like Emmett. She wound up by saying quietly that she would like me even if I moved away to Harvard, or another city far away, even if I didn't want her any more (impossible!), even if I broke her heart and that she thinks she will always like me this much.
In response I told her that I would want to be with her even if she never replaces her truck, even if she wears that awful green sweater she has, even if she listened to yodelling CDs all the time, even if she smelled bad, or had a deeply unflattering haircut or if she sounded like a donkey when she laughed or ate my homework like a goat and even if she grew tired of me, left me and decided she would rather date a human like her instead of me.
Of course I mean all those things and more. She is my mate and my everything. She always will be the only one I ever love and it will be eternal. There can be no doubt about it, our kind love once and forever, regardless of all else. I think often of Marcus, trapped in his agony and grief by Aro, kept from being able to end his existence and in constant grief that never fades over his lost mate. I know his fate lies in store for me, and I do not know how I shall find a way to carry on, it lurks in my subconscious all the time. I try to just focus on every fleeting second with Bella. For once they are gone, once she is gone, all I shall have are those memories. I must make each of them as perfect as possible and gather as many as I can to console myself somehow when recollections are all that are left to me.
Bella is so pure and earnest in her proclamations, of course she does not falter in her faith about us. I know it is her youthful optimism speaking when she tells me she will always like me as she does now. Nevertheless it is so very nice to hear while she still feels that way. I wish I could bottle the feeling and keep it forever. It feels warm and wonderful.
I am a lucky man indeed.
A/N: Reviewers get to hiss at the daylight with Edward until it's time for bed.
Thanks a million to my wonderful betas itsthatkindofanight and wh1teow1, please show some love and read Moirai, a reimagining of Twilight for the new decade!