Disclaimer: Skyrim and the Elder Scrolls rights belong to Bethesda and the like. Only bonus dialogue and romantic content are mine.
Chapter Six
Evelynn
The boat ride to Volkihar was not as smooth as it had been before. The rocky ice water lapped the sides of the small dinghy in a way that made Evelynn queasy. Serana directed her to the west side of the island. It was roughly mid-day, which should be helpful in sneaking into a vampire den. The carriage ride had taken days. Evelynn was glad to be on solid ground again, attempting to shake off the sea sickness. Castle Volkihar seemed even more massive from the side, there were no trees or decor disrupting the enormity of it.
It seemed to be guarded by only a few animated skeletons. Evelynn pulled her crossbow and began picking them off. Serana led her up the staircase towards a door. Entering this place had Evelynns' fur pricking the back of her neck. The halls appeared to be empty, but Evelynn knew better. This part of the castle definitely seemed less grandeur and more run-down. A few skeevers tried taking a bite. It was a damned maze in here. Serana knew where they were going, but there wasn't much of a scent trail for Evelynn to follow. A few of the Death Hounds stalked nearby. Evelynn counted three. She knew her stealth would be blown when the first one died and she braced herself. Serana destroyed one with her ice, and Evelynn had to waste a few bolts on the third, the damned thing was sturdy. Some raggedy, wild looking vampire rushed in for attack. What was this one doing down here? After it was dead, Evelynn noticed it wore rags and had absolutely nothing else. How long had it been here?
There was one bridge going across an open area that seemed to go nowhere in particular, but Evelynn noticed drawbridges on either side. Great, more puzzles. It took Evelynn entirely too long to find the damned levers. Across what, Evelynn assumed, was the correct drawbridge, the smell of rot and decay invaded her nostrils. If the webbing was any indication, of course there was a Giant Frostbite Spider in here. There was no way around it, the way she needed to go was completely walled off by thick web.
"Did you spend a lot of time down here?" Evelynn asked her vampire.
"I like to explore. My parents almost never let me off the island, so yeah, I poked around down here a lot. It was a little... quieter... back then. Guess a little vampire girl was enough to scare off the rats."
"You sound like you were a weird little kid." The thought of Serana as a kid was… heartwarming. Evelynn smiled for the little Nord girl who would brave giant spiders for a bit of adventure. Probably not unlike the Nord woman who would brave vampire hunters for the same reason.
Serana smiled. "I was. But I think I turned out ok."
Evelynn sighed, and fired bolts into the web. She could hear the disgusting beast scurrying about. Once clear, the spider charged the doorway that was much too small for it to fit. It gave Evelynn the opportunity to kill it at her leisure. Of course it died blocking the doorway.
"FUS… RO DAH!" Evelynn shouted its carcass away, clearing a path.
Finally, another door.
The Courtyard was… a mess. Broken stones and dead plants littered the entire area. Evelynn could see the potential though, and understand why Serana would have fond memories of this place. Even in this chaos, it was beautiful, peaceful.
"We've made it to the courtyard. Oh no... What happened to this place? Everything's been torn down... the whole place looks... well, dead. It's like we're the first to set foot here in centuries. This used to lead into the castle's great hall. It looks like my father had it sealed up. I used to walk through here after evening meals. It was beautiful, once. This was my mother's garden. It... do you know how beautiful something can be when it's tended by a master for hundreds of years? She would have hated to see it like this. Wait... Something's wrong with the moondial here. Some of the crests are missing and the dial is askew. I didn't even know the crests could be removed. Maybe my mother's trying to tell us something?"
In the center of the Courtyard was a massive circular structure. Like a sundial, but different. Darker. It was broken, but still beautiful. Evelynn started poking around to find pieces that might match the moons on the floor of the dial. Pearl-blue plate looking things. There were a few alchemical ingredients that Evelynn couldn't help but pick up. It took a little time, but Evelynn found the three missing tiles and placed them back in their brackets. Upon placing the last, the ground shook at her feet and the dial shifted downward, Evelynn thought it was caving in. She looked. A staircase. Fucking puzzles.
"Very clever, mother. Very clever. I've never been in those tunnels before, but I'd bet they run right under the courtyard and into the tower ruins. Well, at least we're getting closer. Let's go." Serana seemed more motivated now. Hopeful.
Somehow, entering the door led to an even more ruined piece of the castle. The back of Evelynns' neck pricked with anxiety.
"I've never even seen this part of the castle before. Be careful. I don't know what might be around."
When they entered a particularly dark room, Evelynn could taste danger. Of course there were more of those delightful Gargoyle statues. Lovely. Evelynn charged the first one, firing bolts, in a hurry to get it over with. If they didn't spring to life she'd feel pretty stupid, but better safe than sorry. As if on cue, it moved for her, then crumbled to the ground. Two more to go. After they were dealt with, Evelynn took their gemstone eyes, ever the scavenger.
"I don't think we've reached the top yet. I'd bet there's some kind of secret passage around here."
Of course there is. Evelynn rolled her eyes. The only thing left to find was an empty fireplace looking opening. That's where she'd put a secret room. She knocked on the stones, pushed on the stones but they wouldn't budge. She leaned against the edge of the frame, her shoulder catching a candlestick. Click.
Evelynn rolled her eyes again and twisted the candlestick. Voila! Magick fucking room.
"Leave it to my mother... always smarter than I gave her credit for."
They found what looked like a massive laboratory. Evelynns' inner alchemist was salivating with possibilities, looking at all the ingredients laying around.
"Look at this place. This has to be it! I knew she was deep into necromancy. I mean, she taught me everything I know. But I had no idea she had a setup like this. Look at all this. She must have spent years collecting these components. And what's this thing? I'm not sure about this circle, but it's obviously... something. Let's take a look around. There has to be something here that tells us where she's gone."
Evelynn looked at the large circular… nothing.
"What exactly are we looking for?"
"My mother was meticulous about her research. If we can find her notes, there might be some hints in there."
"Your mother maintained quite a laboratory."
"I had no idea that her laboratory even existed. She had an alchemy setup in her drawing room, but nothing that even comes close to what's here." The awe and sadness mingled in Seranas' eyes.
"What did she research?"
"Looking at the equipment and materials, it looks like she was trying to advance her necromancy. I remember she used to keep a small journal. See if you can dig it up."
A journal. Evelynn could do that. There were bookshelves everywhere. She started perusing the books. So many history books and alchemy books. One particularly familiar book caught her eye and she picked it up; The Lusty Argonian Maid. Evelynn blushed, remembering the night in her cellar. She put the book back. Bottom shelf. An unmarked leather book. She opened it.
She called for Serana. "I've found your mother's notes."
"You did? Let me see them." Serena took the book and immediately started thumbing through it.
"What's this 'Soul Cairn' that she mentions?"
"I only know what she told me. She had a theory about soul gems. That the souls inside of them don't just vanish when they're used... they end up in the Soul Cairn."
"Why did she care where used souls went?" She couldn't imagine that woman caring much for random lost souls.
"The Soul Cairn is home to very powerful beings. Necromancers send them souls, and receive powers of their own in return. My mother spent a lot of time trying to contact them directly, to travel to the Soul Cairn itself."
"If she made it there, we'll find her."
"That circle in the center of the room is definitely some type of portal. If I'm reading this right, there's a formula here that should give us safe passage into the Soul Cairn."
"What do we need?"
"A handful of soul gem shards, some finely-ground bone meal, a good bit of purified void salts... Oh... damn it..." Intellectual student Serana was… interesting to witness. Evelynn squirmed a little.
"What's wrong?"
"We're also going to need a sample of her blood. Which... if we could get that, we wouldn't even be trying to do this in the first place."
"...You share her blood."
"Hmmm." She looked at Evelynn with a warm smile. "Not bad. We'd better hope that's good enough. Mistakes with these kinds of portals can be... gruesome. Anyway, enough of that. Let's get started."
"Are all of those ingredients here?"
"Oh, definitely. Mother would have plenty of those materials in her laboratory, you just need to find them."
Evelynn set to work again, looking for ingredients. She'd never seen void salts before, but assumed that this dark powder had to be it. She smashed a perfectly good soul gem before finding existing shards, and kicked herself for her own stupidity. She brought armfuls of things to Serana.
"Get the ingredients in the vessel and let me know when you're ready."
Evelynn kind of dumped everything into the stone basin.
"Then the rest is up to me. Are you ready to go? I'm not entirely sure what this thing is going to do when I add my blood." Serana looked to her with concern and impatience.
"...Can I ask you something first?"
"Of course. What is it?"
"What will you do if we find your mother?" The unsettling feeling rolled in Evelynns' stomach. She realized how afraid she was of losing Serana.
"I've been asking myself the same thing since we came back to the castle. She was so sure of what we did to my father, I couldn't help but go along with her. I never thought of the cost."
"I don't know what she was thinking." Evelynn hadn't meant to say it out loud. She winced at her own words.
"Neither do I. She always seemed happy, before we heard the prophecy. Then it all changed. She became a different person. They both did."
"...We won't know until we find her."
"Yes... yes, you're right. I'm sorry. I just didn't expect anyone to care how I felt about her." She lightly squeezed Evelynns' arm. "Thank you. Are we ready then?"
The unsettling feeling worsened by the minute. "Let's get that portal open."
"All right. Here goes."
Serana cut herself. Deep. Blood dripped onto the ingredients, and Evelynn tried not to think about it. The warmth of the memory or the taste in her mouth. But especially the sadness that washed through her about the fact that Serana had to bleed for her mother.
The floor quaked and electricity was everywhere as the circle gave way to a massive doorway, broken concrete stairs traveling into the deep blue unknown.
"By the blood of my ancestors... She actually did it... created a portal to the Soul Cairn. Incredible."
"Incredible. Simply incredible." She squeezed Evelynns' hand and gave her a pained look. "I'm ready when you are."
Evelynn started toward the stairs. They looked so rickety, suspended in air as they were, but they felt sturdy enough. Just as Evelynn walked through the hazy blue film, pain shot through every piece of her. It felt like her body was being ripped inside out. She fought to get out of the agony, dragging herself back up the stairs and heaving ragged breaths. Serana was at her side in an instant, holding her face and checking her over for damage.
"Are you alright? That looked painful."
Evelynn shook slightly, trying to brush it off. "It was. What happened?"
"Now that I think about it... I should have expected that. Sorry. It's hard to describe. The Soul Cairn is... well, hungry, for lack of a better word. It's trying to take your life essence as payment."
"So there's no way in, then?" A strange mixture of relief and disappointment grabbed hold of Evelynn.
"There might be… but I don't think you're going to like it. Vampires aren't counted among the living. I could probably go through there without a problem."
"Are you saying that I need to become a vampire?" Fire and ice tore through her veins. Be... A vampire? Be… sired by Serana? Her blood consuming Evelynns' body? Burning out everything else until she completely belonged to her? Belong to her… forever… Evelynn felt the tears burn in her eyes as she realized the depth of what Serana was offering.
"Not your first choice, I'd guess."
Right. The Dawnguard. They'd have Evelynns' head. And… She would lose her wolf…
"There has to be another way." Evelynn said, trying not to cry for what she had to turn away. She didn't want Serana to have to be stuck with her forever just to get through a magick door.
"Maybe… We could just "pay the toll" another way. It wants a soul, so we give it a soul. Yours."
My soul? "Wouldn't that kill me?"
"My mother taught me a trick or two. I could partially soul trap you, and offer that gem to the Ideal Masters. It might be enough to satisfy them. It would make you a bit weaker when we travel through the Soul Cairn, but we might be able to fix that once we're inside. Maybe."
"Those are my only options?"
"I'm sorry." Serana pulled her close, touching her forehead to Evelynns' and caressing her hair. "I wish I knew a better way, something that would be easier for you. Just know that... whatever path you choose, I won't think any less of you. Sometimes things just have to be done. I know that better than anybody."
"Soul trap me. I won't feel right as a vampire." Evelynn hoped Serana couldn't hear her heart break.
"Are you sure? I'm willing to do it, but you need to think it through. You'll remain mortal, but you'll find yourself weakened within the Soul Cairn."
Evelynn stifled her feelings and squared her shoulders. "I'm ready."
"I know this is difficult for you." Serana wrapped her arms around her, pain in her eyes. "I hope you trust me." She kissed her softly. "I'd never do anything that could hurt you."
"I trust you completely." And she really did.
"Thank you. Let's not waste any more time then."
Evelynn
Evelynn wouldn't say the soul trapping didn't hurt, but it wasn't worth mentioning. The worst part was feeling incomplete, detached. Like her body was just a shell. By the Nine, she just wanted to get this over with.
The Soul Cairn was a big open wasteland. In the distance she could kind of see some kind of buildings, castles maybe.
"I'd heard stories about the Soul Cairn, but never thought I'd see it myself. So far it's... about what I imagined." Serana seemed oddly… underwhelmed. "You'd think a vampire would be right at home in this place. You'd be wrong. Let's just find my mother and get out of here, quickly."
Evelynn couldn't agree more. She hurried past a few glowy Magickal Soul folks, ignoring the terrible sadness they mumbled. Evelynn couldn't help everyone…
She didn't know where she was going, but the giant structure in the middle felt promising. The lack of scent trails was maddening. She could smell… nothing. The thoughts of despair and decay hinted around her nose, but there was nothing really… solid. Everything was just so off.
Creepy dark skeletons popped up from the ground and Evelynn couldn't even really focus on fighting them. Serana seemed to really step up. She didn't let them near her and Evelynn could barely fire off one bolt before Serana killed one… two… three… four of them. Gods, Evelynn wasn't even this out of it when she was hungover. First thing she did when they got back was going to be getting completely drunk with Serana. If the vampire would still have her, anyway.
The walk could've taken minutes or days and Evelynn would've not known the difference. More scary bad guys attacked, and one had even hit Evelynn, which Serana profusely apologized for. But Evelynn could feel… nothing. She felt nothing but cold emptiness in this sliver of Oblivion.
"Mother? Mother!" Serana sounded elated.
Mother? We've found her?
"Maker... it can't be. Serana?" Sure enough, there was a scary looking Nord woman atop the stairs. Stairs?
"Is it really you? I can't believe it! How do we get inside? We have to talk." Serana looked so much like a child wanting to hug her mother. Evelynn would've hugged her if she'd had arms. Where are my arms…?
The Scary Nord stepped back and Evelynn hated it. "Serana? What are you doing here? Where's your father?"
Serana reached for her mother and Evelynn thought for sure that her heart should be breaking for her vampire. "He doesn't know we're here. I don't have time to explain."
Scary Nord turned her back on her daughter. Cunt. "I must have failed. Harkon's found a way to decipher the prophecy, hasn't he."
Serana tugged on her mother's arm. "No, you've got it all wrong. We're here to stop him. To make everything right."
"Wait a moment... you've brought a stranger here? Have you lost your mind?"
Serana pleaded. "No, you don't..."
"You. Come forward. I would speak with you."
Who? Me? I'm… here? Evelynn must've walked towards her because she continued speaking.
"So how has it come to pass that a vampire hunter is in the company of my daughter? It pains me to think you'd travel with Serana under the guise of her protector in an effort to hunt me down."
Evelynn could feel the twitching in the muscles that no longer belonged to her. "This is no ruse. I want to keep her safe." Her voice came through gritted teeth.
"Coming from one who murders vampires as a trade, I find it hard to believe your intentions are noble. Serana has sacrificed everything to prevent Harkon from completing the prophecy. I would've expected her to explain that to you."
Pain. She could feel that pain. It cut through her deep and she had no good explanation. "That's why I'm here for the Elder Scroll…"
"You think I'd have the audacity to place my own daughter in that tomb for the protection of her Elder Scroll alone? The scrolls are merely a means to an end. The key to the Tyranny of the Sun is Serana herself."
Serana? "What do you mean?" Her detached voice was so unsettling.
"When I fled Castle Volkihar, I fled with two Elder Scrolls. The Scroll I presume you found with Serana speaks of Auriel and his arcane weapon, Auriel's Bow. The second scroll declares that 'The Blood of Coldharbour's Daughter will blind the eye of the Dragon.'"
"How does Serana fit in?"
"Like myself, Serana was a human once. We were devout followers of Lord Molag Bal. Tradition dictates the females be offered to Molag Bal on his summoning day. Few survive the ordeal. Those that do emerge as a pure-blooded vampire. We call such confluences the 'Daughters of Coldharbour.'"
"Serana underwent this ritual willingly?" Anger locked her eyes on Valerica.
"It was expected of her, just as it was expected of me. Being selected as an offering to Molag Bal is an honor. She wouldn't have dared turn her back on that."
The world was shaking. Or was that Evelynn? She wanted to call her wolf and eat this vile loathsome being who would do that to her daughter. An honor. Fuck that, she wanted to feel the life leave this monster with her own human hands. Never again. Gods, the wolf was trying so hard to break the cage. Evelynn wanted to be sick.
Serana would never forgive her. She glared through her rage. "The Tyranny of the Sun requires Serana's blood?"
"Now you're beginning to see why I wanted to protect Serana, and why I've kept the other Elder Scroll as far from her as possible."
"Are you saying Harkon means to kill her?"
"If Harkon obtained Auriel's Bow and Serana's blood was used to taint the weapon, the Tyranny of the Sun would be complete. In his eyes, she'd be dying for the good of all vampires."
Evelynn felt stronger in herself than she had in a long time. "I would never allow that to happen."
"And how exactly do you plan on stopping him?"
"I'll kill Harkon." She'd said it without hesitation. Without a single thought that Serana could hear her. Serana could hate her for the rest of her long, long life if she needed to. Harkon would die before he touched her.
"If you believe that, then you're a bigger fool than I originally suspected. Don't you think I weighed that option before I enacted my plans?"
"And Serana's opinion in this?"
"You care nothing for Serana, or our plight. You're still a vampire hunter at heart. You're here because we're abominations in your mind. Evil creatures that need to be destroyed."
"Serana believes me, why won't you?" She didn't know why she asked. She didn't give a fuck what Valerica believed.
"Serana?" Valerica turned to her daughter. "This stranger aligns herself with those who would hunt you down and slay you like an animal. Why should I entrust you to her?"
Serana took Evelynns' numb hand and pulled her close. "This 'stranger' has done more for me in the brief time I've known her than you've done in centuries!"
Valerica spit venom. "How dare you! I gave up everything I cared about to protect you from that fanatic you call a father!"
"Yes, he's a fanatic... he's changed. But he's still my father. Why can't you understand how that makes me feel?"
"Oh, Serana. If you'd only open your eyes. The moment your father discovers your role in the prophecy, that he needs your blood, you'd be in terrible danger."
Serana stood tall. Strong. "So to protect me you decided to shut me away from everything I cared about? You never asked me if hiding me in that tomb was the best course of action, you just expected me to follow you blindly. Both of you were obsessed with your own paths. Your motivations might have been different, but in the end, I'm still just a pawn to you, too. I want us to be a family again. But I don't know if we can ever have that. Maybe we don't deserve that kind of happiness. Maybe it isn't for us. But we have to stop him. Before he goes too far. And to do that, we need the Elder Scroll."
Valerica softened. Finally, the look of a mother. "I'm sorry, Serana. I didn't know... I didn't see. I've allowed my hatred of your father to estrange us for too long. Forgive me. If you want the Elder Scroll, it's yours." She bowed her head to Serana before returning her attention to Evelynn. "Your intentions are still somewhat unclear to me. But for Seranas' sake, I'll assist you in any way that I can."
"Do you have the Elder Scroll with you?"
"Yes. I've kept it safely secured here ever since I was imprisoned. Fortunately, you're in a position to breach the barrier that surrounds these ruins."
"What do we need to do?"
"You need to locate the tallest of the rocky spires that surround these ruins. At their bases, the barrier's energy is being drawn from unfortunate souls that have been exiled here. Destroy the Keepers that are tending them, and it should bring the barrier down."
"We'll return soon."
"One more word of warning. There's a dragon that calls itself Durnehviir roaming the Cairn. Be wary of him. The Ideal Masters have charged him with overseeing the Keepers, and will undoubtedly intervene if you're perceived as a threat."
As Evelynn and Serana left, she could hear Valerica speak with a genuine maternal nature. "Be careful, and keep my daughter safe…"
Serana
"I'm glad you're here. I don't think I could be doing this alone." Serana squeezed Evelynns' fingers.
Evelynn smiled in return, but it did not touch her unsettlingly cold eyes.
Serana had been so caught up in herself; anxious and thrilled and angry about her mother. Afraid for her mother. Uncomfortable in this place. The whole time they'd been in the Soul Cairn, she'd not noticed how little she felt Evelynn. They were headed to destroy the keepers and break the barrier and she finally noticed. Evelynn was there, right there beside her. She was walking normally and talking normally when necessary. But she wasn't… her. It scared Serana. She was remembering fighting the Bonemen and Evelynn had barely fought back. The Wrathman had hurt her… and she hadn't even seemed to notice.
By the Blood, please get us out of here.
She would fight for Evelynn and keep her safe, but it terrified her how lost her Dovahkiin was. She wished Evelynn had just let her turn her. Trapping her soul was… devastating. Being a vampire would've been so much safer. And more… Serana could've kept her forever. Serana was finally acknowledging Evelynns' mortality in the long term. She was certain she would not survive when Evelynn was gone.
But Serana loved her wolf. Loved this mortal. So much that it hurt to think of altering her just to selfishly keep her. Evelynn was exactly everything Serana had never thought to wish for. Changing that seemed so cruel. Those silver eyes would never darken or shine the same again if Serana had turned her.
Still… walking around with the shell of her Love was difficult. She needed to get this over with and get Evelynns' soul back. Quickly. Being without all of her was… like being without air. Suffocating. Lonely. Terrifying.
Kill the Keepers, get the scroll, and get the fuck out of here.
The Keepers were massive, armored skeletal figures, guarding isolated castle fragments. Evelynn seemed to have more fight in her, but Serana wasn't risking her. She hurled her magicks fiercely and even used Evelynns' spare crossbow well enough to piss off the first Keeper and make it focus on her while it was killed. My wolf.
Two more to go. Walking seemed agonizingly slow, but Evelynns' stamina was far too weakened to run. Bonemen, Wrathmen, and Mistmen also kept her on guard while hunting the Keepers. Serana felt every hit that Evelynn took, and it hurt her deeply. Finally they'd killed the other two and headed back to her mother. Serana hated how long it took to get back to the prison.
"You managed to destroy all three Keepers? Very impressive." Her mother seemed genuinely pleased with their accomplishment.
"Are you able to give us the scroll now?" Evelynns' voice sounded perfectly normal, but Serana could feel a difference. She greatly missed the Imperials' randomly intruding accent when she was excited, or angry, or drunk.
"Yes. Please, follow me. Keep watch for Durnehviir. With the prison's barrier down, he's almost certain to investigate."
Mother led them through the prison to a great Courtyard of nothing. Off to the end, Serana could see a chest. That must be the scroll. A horrifying sound rained down over them.
Anxiety washed over Serana. "Wait... I hear something!"
Her mother replied in fear. "It's Durnehviir... he's here! Defend yourselves!"
The skeletal Dragon landed opposite the courtyard, roaring a deathly sound. She hurled her Magick at it and noticed that Evelynn seemed to automatically battle the beast. Her shouts were… somehow more commanding. Maybe trapping so much of her human soul had… made room for her dragon soul to dominate. She seemed so cold… so ruthless. Her unrelenting focus and determination was truly awe inspiring. Serana was glad that this Dragon seemed no more bothersome than usual. Just a normal irritation for her Dovahkiin. Durnehviir fell just as easily as the other Dragons in Tamriel.
Her mother turned to the icy Dovahkiin. "Forgive my astonishment, but I never thought I'd witness the death of that dragon."
"What makes you say that?" Evelynn sounded very businesslike; emotionless.
"Volumes written on Durnehviir allege that he can't be slain by normal means. It appears they were mistaken. Unless..."
"Go on."
"The soul of a dragon is as resilient as its owner's scaly hide. It's possible that your killing blow has merely displaced Durnehviir's physical form while he reconstitutes himself."
"How long will that take?" Evelynn looked to the sky.
"Minutes? Hours? Years? I can't even begin to guess. I suggest we don't wait around to find out. Now, let's get you the Elder Scroll and you can be on your way."
Serana couldn't be happier having found her mother and gotten everything off her chest. But she was more anxious now to get Evelynn back to the portal, back to Tamriel. Her Dovahkiin didn't belong here. She wasn't entirely sure how to get Evelynns' soul back, but she needed to figure it out quickly. Valerica gave the Scroll to Evelynn, and Serana found that she didn't much give a damn about the Scrolls right now.
"Now that you've retrieved the Elder Scroll, you should be on your way."
Evelynn met Serana's eyes and it chilled the vampire how… empty they were. "Can you help get my soul back?" She asked Valerica.
Of course! Her mother would know.
"So my daughter applied some of the lessons I taught her about necromancy, did she? Don't worry, I think I can help you."
"Good, I could use all the help I can get."
"Your soul essence was trapped inside a gem. When you and Serana entered the Soul Cairn, it was "given" to the Ideal Masters as payment. You simply need to retrieve the gem. The moment you touch it, your soul essence will be restored."
"Any idea where it could be?"
"There's an offering altar not terribly far from here. I'm willing to bet that the gem you're looking for is there. Is there anything else? Could be your last chance."
"You're staying here?" Seranas' heart dropped at the realization in Evelynns' question.
"I have no choice. As I told you before, I'm a Daughter of Coldharbour. If I return to Tamriel, that increases Harkon's likelihood of bringing the Tyranny of the Sun to fruition."
"We'll return when we can." Evelynn said in her businesslike fashion. Serana knew how nice of a sentiment that was for her, even if it did sound a bit cold. She loved that Evelynn would return for her mother.
"I appreciate your concern for me, but Serana is all that I care about. You must keep her safe at all costs"
Serana hugged her mother and kissed her cheek before taking her Dovahkiin away. She needed Evelynn. All of Evelynn. The tower wasn't far from where they were, but Serana was so impatient it seemed to take forever. The labyrinth inside was a great annoyance. A portal in the floor looked to be the best option. It led to the roof of the building, which was guarded by a Crystal. Serana could see a massive stone chest under the Crystal. She'd bet her Blood that Evelynns' soul was there. But she couldn't retrieve it. She could not touch the soul. Evelynn would have to get it alone.
"Evelynn, look at me. It has to be in that chest. You have to be quick. The crystal will drain you as long as you are close. It will kill you. Please, hurry. I need to get you out of here."
Evelynn nodded curtly. Serana held her breath for what seemed like a lifetime, as her Dovahkiin walked calmly up the landing. Watching her be drained as she casually looked for her soul was agonizing.
Come on… hurry…
Evelynn picked up a black soul gem and Serana could feel her come back. All the way back. Complete. Serana ran to her, taking her hand and dragging her from the rooftop.
They ran all the way back to the portal to Tamriel.
Evelynn
Back in Valericas' study, Evelynn heaved ragged breaths, fighting for oxygen. Serana hadn't said a word. She'd just dragged her along with an insane need to leave that awful place. It was good to be whole again, but Evelynn had almost wished she was still numb so she would not be feeling the burn in her lungs.
Serana had barely gotten them to the top of the stairs before she rounded on Evelynn. Tears falling from her fiery eyes. Evelynn reached for her, still breathing hard. She hated seeing Serana cry. The vampire ignored her hands and crushed her lips to Evelynns'.
"Serana, slow down," Evelynn twisted away from the vampire's eager lips. "What's going on?"
"Shut up." Serana choked through a sob.
The Nord fought with the ties on Evelynns' armor, clawing her way at her. Evelynn was unsettled, and scared. But Serana seemed to need… something. Evelynn put her hands behind her head and kissed back, but let Serana take what she needed. Bittersweet, Serana made love to Evelynn.
Evelynn
"You didn't drink from me." Evelynn mused as she ran her fingers through Seranas' hair.
Serana laughed weakly. "I thought I did that quite well."
"You know what I mean." She kissed her vampire's forehead.
Serana stilled. "I'm not… with you for your blood."
"I know that, Love. But it's yours. I like that I can do that for you. I want to do that for you."
"I'm… dealing with some things. It's not something you can help me with, Dovahkiin."
"Hey…" Evelynn propped up on her elbow and placed a hand on the Nords' cheek. "We'll get your mother back."
"I know." Serana shut her eyes and squeezed her hand.
"Then what has you in such chaos?"
"I'm centuries old, Evelynn. I've lived hundreds of lifetimes."
"Yes…?"
"Without outside forces, I'll likely live several hundred more."
"Yes? Serana… what…?"
"You won't…" the vampire whispered softly as a tear fell from her closed eyes.
"... Oh…" an awful feeling shot through Evelynn.
"I don't know… how to live without you again…" Serana was trembling.
Evelynn pulled her close, holding her tightly. "Let's just get through this together, okay? We'll figure out everything else later."
She held the vampire, naked and on the floor of her castle, while Serana wept. Evelynn was so uncomfortable with so much feeling inside her, but this wasn't about her. Her discomfort was irrelevant compared to what Serana was facing. Serana would not face this forever, but Evelynn couldn't tell her that. Not right now. Not like this. She couldn't have Serana turn her out of desperation and fear.
Serana
Evelynn had said they should stop in Whiterun on their way back to Dawnguard. She hadn't been very fond of the city and it puzzled Serana why she would suggest it. It was shortly after sunrise, three days after they'd left the castle, when they'd arrived at the strangely open city. The guards greeted their Thane respectfully. Serana expected to walk further into the town, but Evelynn stopped at a house only a few paces from the main gate.
"Are we not going to the Inn?" Serana asked her, suddenly feeling strangely nervous.
Evelynn looked… vulnerable. "This is… my home. We could go to the Inn, though, if you'd prefer."
"No I just… it didn't occur to me that you still had a home here…"
"It makes me sad. I haven't been here in a while."
Evelynn seemed to… need to face this. Serana caressed the length of her Dovahkiins' arms. "I'd like to see your home."
Evelynn smiled weakly and unlocked the door. Inside, a layer of dust coated everything. The place had, indeed, been untouched for quite some time. Serana noticed the small fire pit in the main room with logs still stacked neatly. She threw a small amount of fire Magick into the pit, igniting the over dried wood and illuminating the deserted home.
Evelynn ran a hand through her hair. "Yeah… sorry. I don't have anyone looking after the place anymore. I suppose I should look into getting a Steward."
"It's very… cozy." Serana struggled for the word. Compared to the Lakeview Manor, this place was barely bigger than a stable. But it did have a certain charm.
"The bedroom's upstairs… I'm sure I could get some fresh bedding and water from Adrienne. She's just next door. Make yourself at home, I'll be back shortly." Evelynn kissed her cheek and headed out the front door.
Serana looked around the small living room. There were a few chairs around the fire, in the back she could see the cooking and dining area. The dining table dominated the limited space. Serana began to understand how much Evelynn had put into building her new home; making it as warm and welcoming as possible. Nothing in this place felt like Evelynn. Serana searched cupboards until she found candles. There weren't many, but they'd do for the day. She walked through the house placing candles in the sconces and lighting them.
Upstairs, there was a single chair on the landing, by the master bedroom. Serana looked through the end table near the chair. More books. The vampire smiled. She stumbled across the title The Physicalities of Werewolves, and started reading. The author of the book had done… abhorrent experiments on these creatures… only to understand the thing that he hated. All of his experiments ended in the death of the animals. Serana slammed the book closed and put it back. This was how Evelynn understood her own anatomy so well. By reading this vile, atrocious medical journal.
The master bedroom was small, but not as small as she'd feared. There was a large double bed, two end tables, a large dresser, and a wardrobe. A wash basin rested in the corner. Serana opened the dresser and found few clothes, but there was one gray, linen shirt with the sleeves ripped off. She smiled and knew it belonged to her Dovahkiin. She shook the dust off and folded it neatly, placing it back in the drawer.
Across the landing, Serana saw a closet. She went to see what might be stored there. It wasn't a closet at all; it was a spacious, empty bedroom. The single bed was neatly made up with various furs. The chair in the corner sat next to a small dresser. On top of the dresser was a steel greatsword. She ran her fingers delicately over the blade. Cold steel. Dangerous, calculated, foreign to Seranas' hand. Yet it was captivating; it resonated importance.
"That was hers."
Serana turned with a start. She hadn't heard Evelynn come in, or upstairs. She looked at the sword again. Definitely not Evelynns' style.
"Your Housecarl…"
Evelynn nodded. "Lydia."
"It's a beautiful weapon."
Evelynn laughed once. "Yeah. She never would let me gift her with Skyforge Steel. Her pride clung to that sword much longer than I'd hoped. Nord Pride." She rolled her eyes.
Serana wanted to retort, but this didn't seem the time. "You're a Companion."
Evelynn nodded. "Harbinger, actually."
"What have they been doing in the absence of their leader?" It had been little more than a month that they'd been together consistently..
"I left Aela in charge." Evelynn shrugged. "She's more of a leader than I am anyway."
A wolf without her pack. Serana's heart ached. "It's hard for you. Being here."
She nodded again.
"Why did you want to come here?"
Evelynn ran a hand through her hair. "I'm not really sure. I just… wanted to take you home."
Serana wrapped her arms around her Dovahkiin. Tried to kiss her. Evelynn gently twisted away. "There's clean water in the master bedroom. Rags and fresh clothes to sleep in."
Serana understood. This room was difficult for her. She smiled softly and excused herself to clean up. She noticed that Evelynn had changed the bedding, even dusted the tables. How long had she been in Lydias' room? Serana stripped her armor and washed away her travels and concerns.
Downstairs, she found Evelynn sitting by the fire, hair dripping onto her sleeveless linen shirt. She'd bathed downstairs. Serana moved her hair and gently kissed the back of her neck.
"Will you come to bed, Dovahkiin?"
Evelynn smiled at her and got up. Serana pulled her hand gently up to the master bedroom. They'd been alone before, but this was… different. Like… their own home. Their own private space. Serana blushed at the realization. The room was dark, after she closed the thick curtains covered the windows. Only the candlelight flickered across the room. "I've got something for you." Evelynn murmured. "If you'll have it."
Something about her tone was very… sobering. Serana approached her cautiously. Evelynn pulled a strip of leather from her waistband. A collar. Beautiful red filigree etched along the black leather. In the center was a small silver badge; a wolfs' head. Serana touched it gently. She looked into Evelynns' eyes.
"The one you wear. I know the symbol. If you'll have it, I'd like you to wear this instead. I'll protect you. For as long as I live."
Serana was trembling as she touched the leather on her neck. The symbol of Molag Bal. She could feel the tides crashing through her. Fear and warmth battled inside her. Evelynn took her hand, caressed her knuckles. Her silver eyes were so vulnerable.
"I don't want you to belong to him…" Evelynn whispered, tears filling her eyes.
Serana wasn't prepared for the shattering of everything she'd ever known. The first person who'd ever said that to her in her centuries of life. The first person to seem genuinely sorry for how Serana had gotten her gift. She kissed Evelynn with every feeling she had a word for. She didn't even really notice the warm tears streaming down her face.
"Is that a yes?" Evelynn whispered against her mouth.
Serana laughed. "Yes. That's a yes."
Evelynn kissed her, deeply. Slowly, she felt the Dovahkiins' hand grip her collar and rip it from her neck. It almost hurt. Evelynn kissed the skin that had always been hidden behind the leather. Kissing, licking, biting… Serana shivered and pulled at Evelynns' shirt.
"Put it on me." Serana breathed, turning her back to her Wolf.
Evelynn laced the strap around her throat and buckled it gently. It wasn't as tight as the other and Serana found that so… comforting. She caught Evelynns' hands as she finished and pulled Evelynn against her back. Evelynn held her sweetly.
"Touch me."
Evelynn pulled back slightly. "... What…?"
Serana turned to face her again. "I want you to touch me."
"... Are you sure?" Her Dovahkiin made no move towards her.
"Yes. Touch me."
Evelynn was so hesitant. So gentle. She caressed Seranas' cheek. Her jaw. Traced her fingers over the new collar with a soft smile. She delicately lifted Seranas' borrowed shirt up and over her head, dropping it to the floor. Serana closed her eyes and felt the warm, calloused fingers trail over her collarbones, her shoulders, down her arms. Across her stomach, causing ripples of excitement in their wake. They lightly danced over Seranas' breasts and she melted against her Dovahkiin.
"Make love to me, Evelynn."
Those fingers lifted her chin until she opened her eyes to find silver shining darkly. She brought Seranas' hands up and placed them around her neck. Kissed her gently, tracing her lower lip with her tongue. Serana shivered and pulled her closer. Strong hands lifted her and carried her to the bed. Evelynn laid back, straddling Seranas' legs across her hips. Hands massaged her back, her hips. Serana moaned softly at the touch. Hands came up to feel her breasts. So gentle. Serana ground herself against Evelynn and moaned again.
"Drink from me." Evelynn breathed.
Serana kissed her neck. Her fangs pierced the skin and she drank deeply. Evelynn ripped away the underwear that covered Serana and touched her. Gods… Serana moved into the touch instead of away from it. Slowly circling her too sensitive flesh, Serana moaned into Evelynns' neck. Her Dovahkiin slipped inside Serana and groaned. It was too much. The sounds, the sensations, oh the blood.
Serana tore away from Evelynn with ragged breaths and bit into the soft skin of her own wrist. She put the wound to Evelynns' mouth. "Drink."
The feel of Evelynns' lips pulling at her blood desperately was euphoric. Drink from me while you make love to me… Serana watched her Wolfs' face for a moment before returning to her neck. Drinking from each other while Evelynn touched her… Serana climaxed hard. Too quickly. She crushed her body down on Evelynns' and cried out.
Her Wolf held her close while she convulsed in ecstasy.
"I love you." Evelynn whispered to her.
Serana simply smiled… perfectly calm and happy. "I know."
Evelynn
"We should go back to Winterhold and get our horses. I'm sure Dusk is getting anxious." Evelynn said as they walked towards the front gate. She was growing ever grateful that she'd decided to follow a lead for the Dragon Scroll before tracking down Valerica. Fuck, she didn't have the motivation to find another damned scroll. The Dwemer ruins would've been hell after her soul had been wrecked so thoroughly.
"Do you think he's had enough time to heal? It hasn't been that long." Serana seemed hesitant.
"Aren't the mages all into healing? I hate leaving him there…"
"I understand. Why don't we go check on them? If he's up for it, we'll take them."
"Okay… anything you need before we go?"
"Hmm… I don't think so. I need… to hunt." Serana looked around nervously.
Evelynn laughed. "Yeah, I'm kind of starving myself. Let's see what we can snag around here before hopping a carriage."
Evelynn felt so much… lighter. After last night. The world seemed… happier. Brighter. Almost uncomfortably bright. She shook her head and led Serana towards the woods. The vampire had agreed to be hers and only hers. She felt her abdomen tighten at the thought. Her Vampire.
The sun had completely set by the time they reached the trees, and the forest seemed to come alive. Evelynn could smell everything; the animals, the bugs, the stream off in the distance. She could hear the rustling leaves and a steady rhythmic drumming that seemed to soothe her and keep her grounded. She drew her crossbow and fired. Bear. One more bolt to ensure a swift death. Evelynn began building the fire.
"Are you okay?" Serana watched her awkwardly.
Evelynn laughed. "I'm fine, My Love. Why do you ask?"
"That's a bear…"
Evelynn looked at the carcass she was about to skin. "So it is."
Serana widened her eyes but then shook her head. "I guess I just didn't realize how hungry you were…"
Evelynn frowned at the animal. "Bears just… taste better. And they make a strong leather."
Serana laughed. "I'm not judging. I'm going to find… something to drink."
Evelynn grinned at her and set about skinning the beast. She carved off a chunk of thigh meat and put it over a makeshift spit over the fire. She licked the blood off her dagger before putting it back in her waistband and began salting the hide.
"You look hot when you do that." Serana emerged from the trees, wiping her mouth.
Evelynn blushed at the unexpected compliment. "It'll need to be treated and dry for several days before I can tan it. I should brain it, but I don't exactly have a pot big enough for that."
Serana gripped Evelynns' throat and kissed her deeply, licking her tongue and moaning. "Hot." She said against her lips.
"You taste good…" Evelynn licked her lips.
Serana laughed. "As do you."
"What did you find?"
"A few bandits."
Excitement tugged at Evelynns' libido. Why? Evelynn turned the meat over the fire.
"That smells… good. May I?" Serana reached for the still raw meat.
Evelynn looked at her oddly, but cut off two slices. She handed one to Serana and ate the other herself. She rarely ate uncooked meat in this form, but Divines did it taste good. Evelynn drank water from her canteen, and choked.
Serana laughed and patted her back. "Slow down."
"I think there's something in the water, I'm gonna rinse it out and refill it."
Evelynn walked to the stream and emptied the clear contents into the bank. Odd. She rinsed the bottle and drank as soon as she'd filled it. Her werewolf blood kept her safe and healthy, so she hadn't needed to bother with boiling water for some time. It didn't taste as refreshing as she'd hoped, but she drank the entire canteen and refilled it again.
When she approached the fire again, she saw Serana, slicing a piece of meat directly from the bear and popping it into her mouth. She laughed.
"Are you okay?"
"I think I'm finding that you give me new appetites in life, Dovahkiin." She flashed her fanged grin at Evelynn.
"I could say the same to you, My Lady." Evelynn straddled the vampire and licked the blood from her chin.
Serana groaned and gripped Evelynns' thighs, slightly thrusting her hips upward. Fuck it, one more hour won't hurt.
Serana
The women lay naked on the dirt floor of the forest, tangled up in one another.
"How are we ever going to get anything done?" She growled into her Wolfs' bare breasts.
Evelynn laughed. "Very, very slowly, I imagine."
Serana looked up at Evelynn, noticing the smears of blood on her cheek, her neck, her collarbones. She laughed. "You're a mess, Dovahkiin."
Evelynn pulled a twig from Seranas' hair and raised an eyebrow.
"Okay, we're a mess." She rolled her eyes.
"Yes. Yes we are." Evelynn smiled and pulled at her face to kiss her.
"We have to get this scroll to Dexion…" her voice sounded embarrassingly needy.
"Yes. We do." Evelynn was sliding her hand up the inside of the vampires thigh.
"Fuck…"
"If you insist…" Evelynn rolled on top of her, kissing and nipping her neck.
Serana felt drunk. Thoroughly addicted. It was hard to care. A light rain began to fall on them.
"Aren't you- nnh! Cold?" Serana asked her insatiable Wolf.
"No." Evelynn kissed her harder.
Loving her in the dirt felt so… hot. So bad. So unladylike. So perfectly right. Serana looked up at the night sky and let Evelynn just love her.
"Fuck!" Evelynn rolled off of her quickly, leaving her feeling bereft.
"What…?" Serana sat up, searching.
Evelynn laughed. "I stuck my foot in the fire."
"Oh gods, are you all right?"
Evelynn was rinsing her ankle with the canteen. Her expression was odd, but she shook her head. "Yeah, fine. It just startled me. Where were we?"
"You mean before roasting the Dragonborn? Or before getting distracted?"
Evelynn growled and kissed her way up Seranas' leg again, stopping to place a particularly slow kiss to her sex. The vampire gasped a startled moan. "I'm growing fond of distractions…" she murmured into the curls.
Serana sighed, giving into temptation again. She'd spent so long denying herself this pleasure, it was hard to stop after tasting the other side. She laced her fingers into Evelynns' as her Dovahkiin kissed her so inappropriately.
Evelynn
"Do you want to get cleaned up in the stream?"
Serana was laying on her back breathing hard. "I can't believe you expect me to travel again after all that. My legs don't even want to work."
Evelynn laughed. "We could just stay here if you'd like…" she softly bit into her Vampires hip.
"No! Gods, you're so greedy. When did you get so bitey?" She rubbed her hip.
"Shagging a vampire, I'm sure some things are bound to rub off." She trailed kisses under her navel.
Serana grabbed her face and looked her in the eye. "Behave. We have things to do, Dovahkiin."
"Right. We'll get cleaned up and… do you think the carriage driver would notice what we're doing in the back?"
"Oh for Bloods' sake. Focus, Evelynn."
The wolf only barked a laugh. "Okay, okay. Come on." She reached out to help Serana to her feet.
Gods, she thought her Vampire would fall over on those wobbly legs. Serana looked so wild and sexy. Naked in the firelight, gentle rain rinsing the dirt and blood down her body… perfect. Evelynn couldn't help appreciating the sight. She caught Seranas' molten metal eyes and her grin fell. She kissed her lips gently. Not so gently. Hungry. Serana fisted her fingers in Evelynns' hair and moaned into her mouth.
"Fucks' sake, Evelynn! We need to go!"
Evelynn laughed. "I like it when you swear." She scooped up her Vampire and ran to the stream, Serana squealing and giggling in a very girlish fashion the entire way. She jumped in feet first, cradling the Nord.
The water was a bit cold, but that could only help them get over themselves long enough to get moving. Serana splashed water in her face and complained but she was still smiling. Evelynn helped her clean the dirt from her face, her neck, her back. She trailed kisses along Seranas' shoulders and hugged her close.
"I don't think I deserve you…" Serana said suddenly.
"Well that's too damn bad. Because you got me."
Serana shot her a side eye and a twisted smile. "You're too… perfect. It's infuriating."
She turned her Vampire to face her. "That's just because I don't know any better, Love. I could've been a complete shite before. Besides…" She lifted Seranas' legs and wrapped them around her waist, "I don't mind being a little bad…" she grazed her teeth along her jaw, causing her to shiver.
"I'm noticing. Maybe I'm a terrible influence." There was a smile even in her voice.
Evelynn laughed. "You can influence me whenever you like, My Lady."
Serana moaned. "Maybe I will. But for now," she pushed off Evelynn and crossed her arms. "Down, Girl. We have things to do."
"Yes, My Lady." Evelynn laughed and headed for their clothes.
Serana
Of course it was daylight by the time they actually got started with the carriage ride. On to Winterhold, to see about their horses. The sun was becoming less annoying to Serana, as they often got caught out in it. Evelynns' lack of any kind of sleep schedule made it difficult to find a structured sense of travel, but her Imperial did try so hard to maintain her health and rest. She smiled down at Evelynn in the early morning, then laughed. Evelynn had a pile of furs over her head as she leaned into Serana.
"What are you doing?" Serana lifted the furs to find those silver eyes, puffy and half closed.
"Sleeping, I think…"
Serana laughed again, but it felt odd. "Have I worn you out that much, Dovahkiin?"
"Mmmm…" her silver eyes fluttered closed again.
Serana shifted the furs so her Wolf could breathe easier, then held her quietly for a time. She touched her new collar with love. The sense of dread was quieted, but not gone. She'd have to find a way to protect her Wolf from Molag Bal. She was clinging to the hope that her own Daedric Prince, Hircine, would have a claim on her that would prove greater. She only knew that she could not lose her Wolf. Maybe she… No. She would not ask Evelynn to turn for her. She couldn't do that to her Love. She would keep her safe until her lifespan naturally expired, and then she would deal with her own despair afterward. She snuck another glance at her perfect Wolf.
"No light…" Evelynn mumbled and rolled into Seranas' stomach, snoring.
Evelynn had said she rarely slept, and Serana could understand why. But she'd seen her sleep enough since she'd known her to know that Evelynn didn't snore. She frowned and covered her eyes again. She knew she should be sleeping too, but the morning was strangely calming. The drizzle had stopped, giving the world a clear shine. Serana couldn't remember the last time she found comfort in daylight.
Evelynn
"Are you all right?" Serana asked her, a strange worried look in her eyes.
"I'm fine, My Love. Just a headache. Could we stay at the Inn until nightfall? Then we'll check on the horses. I just want to get inside."
"Of course, Dovahkiin. Can I help?"
"You can try… let's just get to the Inn first."
They'd just entered Winterhold. The sun was blaring pain into Evelynns' eyes and the pressure behind her ears made every sound highly abrasive. She should be drinking more water, but all the water just tasted off. Maybe they'd have clean water here with all the snow they had. Evelynn handed a coin purse to Serana to pay for the room and sat at a table and put her head down. So much noise. At least the light in here was easier to handle.
"Come, Love. I've got us a room." Serana ran her fingers over the back of her neck, massaging the muscle. It felt divine.
Evelynn sighed and followed her Vampire with a smile. Serana removed her armor for her and sat her in a chair in just her soft clothes.
"You're babying me." Evelynn said calmly.
"You're loving it. Just sit still and relax, I'm not sure how good I am at this yet." She put her hands on either side of Evelynns' head and concentrated adorably. Evelynn closed her eyes.
"It's noisy in here for early morning, isn't it? That Bard is annoyingly repetitive."
Serana removed her hands slowly. It felt odd, but she put them back on her face a moment later and Evelynn started to feel better. Much better. The pain in her head and neck was almost gone.
"Hey… you are good at this." Evelynn smiled.
The Bard picked up his stupid drumming pace and Evelynn rolled her eyes, looking at Serana. Then she froze. Serana was standing perfectly still, eyes wide and hands over her mouth. What the fuck?
"What's…?" Serana moved her hands and Evelynn could see the twisted expression there. She wanted to ask, but Serana started poking at her mouth, moving her lips around. Well… this is weird.
"Wait here." Serana choked out in a broken sob.
She left Evelynn sitting there, confused. Her headache was almost completely gone, why was she freaking out? Evelynn touched her face. Had Serana burned her or something? Everything felt fine. Serana returned as quickly as she'd left and stuffed a red bottle up to her mouth.
"Drink."
Evelynn drank. Gods, it was worse than the water she'd been drinking. Too bitter. But she drank it. It was empty and Serana still kept holding it to her mouth. She had to take the bottle from her and breathe. She looked at it.
"Cure Disease? My Love, I'm a werewolf. I can't catch diseases. I'm fine, really."
Serana said nothing, she just messed with her mouth again. Evelynn hadn't yet found Serana annoying, but this was pushing it. She took Seranas' hands and held them tightly, away from her face, but still trying for comfort.
"I'm f-"
"You're not fine, Evelynn!" Serana was suddenly hysterical. The sound of it seared her aching head.
Evelynn jumped up, startled. The drumming was grating her nerves and she opened the door to tell him to knock off all the noise. The dining room was empty. There was no Bard. What…? Was she losing it? She closed her eyes and followed the noise. She found herself in the middle of their room, standing next to Serana. She looked at her Vampire questioningly. She leaned her head closer. And closer. Until her ear was pressed against her chest. Seranas' heart was going crazy. She'd been hearing her heartbeat.
"Hey… why's it so loud?" Evelynn asked her, touching her chest softly.
"It's not…" Serana whispered.
Serana was crying. Really crying.
"Serana… what the fuck is going on?"
"I did this to you… I'm so sorry… I'm so fucking sorry, Evelynn." She was really losing it.
"Did what? Serana, what's happening? You're freaking me out."
"Fucks' sake, look! Look what I've done to you!" She dragged Evelynn over to the mirror and made her look. It was just her face. So what?
"I don't get it…"
Serana sobbed again and pulled up Evelynns' lip. She really needed to stop doing that… Oh. What…? Evelynn moved out of her grasp and opened her mouth. She leaned closer to her reflection and examined what was, very clearly, fangs.
"Is that like, a weird spell or something?" Evelynn was strangely fascinated with the mild alteration of her face. She smiled. It looked… kind of cool.
"How are you feeling?" Serana asked her quietly.
"I feel… confused? And a little freaked out by you. But that's all."
"Are you feeling hungry?"
Evelynn thought about it. "Not especially right now, no."
Serana turned her around to face her again. "Are you feeling thirsty?"
Her throat ached at the word. Her teeth throbbed. The back of her neck prickled and her bones cracked deliciously.
"Yes…" Evelynn breathed.
"I'm so sorry…" Serana closed her eyes and cried again.
"Will you stop, please?"
"I've infected you, Evelynn! It's too late to cure it!"
Evelynn laughed. "But I can't-"
"But you did! And it's my fault…" Serana sank to the floor and cried.
Evelynn sat beside her, unsure of what to do. "Hey… um. I know… I know this seems to be hard on you right now… but could you help me?"
"Why don't you hate me?"
"Because I love you, for starters. Also, I'm not sure I really believe any of this. But, honestly… I don't mind."
"You don't mind? You don't mind that I fucked a disease into you?" She was getting that shrieky pitch again.
"It'd be odd to feel like it's a disease when you're a vampire, Serana. Lighten up. Also, what?" Why did her crazy words turn Evelynn on?
"Three days ago. At your house. It was too much. I gave you too much. And I didn't notice. And now it's too late. It was reckless. Careless." Serana was getting to be too much.
Oh. Oh…
Evelynn slid closer, and put her arm around Serana. Serana shied away from it. Evelynn could feel her own heart break. "Oh… I'm sorry." She moved away again.
"What the fuck could you be sorry for?" She sounded pissed.
"I won't touch you… I didn't mean… I'm just sorry."
"Stop being sorry! Why aren't you angry?" The shrieking was hard.
"Because I wanted…" tears choked her throat and stung her eyes.
"You wanted what, Evelynn?" She was so angry.
Evelynn curled her knees up to her chest and buried her face. Nothing. She wanted nothing. She could hear Seranas' heart skip a beat, and then she sighed.
"What did you want, Evelynn?" Her voice was softer. Defeated sounding.
"I wanted… to be with you. Forever. I wanted to belong to you. But… I understand if it's different. If you don't… want me like this…"
"By the Blood… you're afraid I won't want you? That's what you're worried about?"
Evelynn shrugged.
"You're not at all worried about my cursing you to an eternal life of night?"
"No."
"Why?"
"Because I love you…"
Serana looked at her with the strangest expression. Then she got up, and left the room. Evelynn felt the world crumble. It was worth everything just to have known her as long as she did. Maybe she would still have her selfish tie to her for eternity, even if Serana didn't want to be around for it. Evelynn went to the bed and laid down. She'd still kill Harkon, and bring Valerica back. Serana deserved to be safe, happy. She deserved the family she wanted. Evelynn closed her eyes and cried.
She heard a noise on the end table and looked up. Serana had set down a wine goblet and got to her knees, eye level with Evelynn.
"Of course I love you, you silly vampire."