A/N: This is a very lengthy chapter. Please be aware of the trigger warning below.

TRIGGER WARNING: MENTIONS OF WILLIAM LEWIS STORYLINE, ASSAULT, KIDNAPPING, TORTURE, SEXUAL ASSAULT, SUICIDE

-oo0O0oo-

Olivia cuts him off, "I was attacked."

Elliot stares at her with wide eyes. Waiting for Olivia to continue he sits in his own quiet. Olivia says nothing more. Elliot nods his head ever so slightly, "Liv…"

"I need to pull over," Olivia flicks her blinker on and swerves to the right. Barely putting the hand brake on, she swings the door open and runs to the passenger side. Holding her hair back with one hand and gripping her knee with the other, she throws up.

Not even phased by the throw-up, Elliot rushes out of the car to aid his partner, "Liv! Liv are you okay?"

She shakes her head and wipes her mouth with her hand, "You should drive." She tosses him the keys and sits herself in the passenger side. Elliot slowly enters the car and pushes start. He looks over at her partner who is leaning against the door and looking longingly out the window. Elliot takes a deep breath and slowly pulls back on the main road. Sitting in silence for what felt like an eternity, Olivia turns her head towards Elliot, "I was attacked." He nods his head along, not knowing if he should say something or keep his mouth shut. "Wil-" she shivers as she tries to say his name, "William Lewis…"

While staying quiet on the outside, Elliot screams in his head, 'What'd he do? What'd he do?'

"We brought him in as a flasher," Olivia breathes out sharply, "He burned his fingerprints off… He was released from custody. Lewis attacked the only witness we had." Every sentence she says is brief but also clear-cut, "He tortured her and raped her for over eighteen hours."

"Liv…" Elliot softly blurts out.

Olivia shakes her head and buries her face into her hands, "I flirted with him. I flirted with him in interrogation."

"That doesn't make it your fault…"

"He… He tried to kill himself in holding while waiting for the lineup…"

"He was going for an insanity plea."

"The woman died from a heart attack. She was so… so traumatized it killed her… We tried to get him for her death, but the lab… the lab contaminated the evidence…"

"A mistrial…" Elliot doesn't mean to keep finishing her thoughts.

"Cragen sent me home," Olivia could feel a tingle in her body, "One thing he was good at, was making it look like you invited him in."

"No forced entry…"

"I don't know how, but he was in my apartment… He knocked me out… And when I woke up… I was bound and gagged… He forced me to drink whiskey and vodka, and take sleeping pills… I don't remember…"

Elliot can see out of the corner of his eye that she is curling up into a ball in her seat, "Liv, you don't have to-"

She holds up her hand to silence him, "If I don't tell you now, I don't think I ever will…" Elliot nods and lets her proceed, "I remember the smell. The smell of the cigarettes and… the burning…" Olivia adjusts her posture and slides her blazer off her shoulder. Moving the hem of her shirt she reveals a light scar to Elliot who continuously glances over, "He used whatever he could find… Mostly keys or silverware."

Elliot was about to pull over and throw up, just as she did. Thinking, 'How could this happen?'

"Brian was stuck at work… And he knew that… I remember waking up in the trunk of a car. I could barely keep my eyes open. He brought me to his lawyer's parent's house. He…" Olivia focuses on her breathing, "He tortured the father, leaving him to die, but the mother… He made me watch…"

Elliot twitches as he listens to her.

"I'm in the backseat of the car with a tarp over me, and I can see blue lights… He killed him and left him on the road," Olivia glances at Elliot who is barely holding it together, "He found a vacant beach house, and… he handcuffed me to the iron bedframe… He asked me if… If I wanted to see anyone for one last time."

Elliot and Olivia make very brief eye contact. Olivia knew that this must have been killing him, just as much as it was killing her. Elliot asks gently, "Did he- um… Did he?"

Shaking her head swiftly she adamantly answers, "No. No, he didn't… I wasn't…" Olivia can't even say it. She runs her hands down her shirt slowly and trembles, "There was a woman at the door. I could hear them talking. I could hear Lewis talking with the daughter. She must have been no more than 8 years old." She turns to look out the window again, "He forced them inside. He was gonna… He had to finish with me first though." A smirk grows on her face, "But he didn't know that I wiggled the post from the bedframe free."

Elliot notices her shift in disposition. She shifted from anxiety-ridden to outright triumph.

"I bash the bar in his face, and he tries to grab the gun," she licks her lips, "I break his arm with the bar and kick him in the balls."

Elliot adjusts his posture, trying to take in the information.

"I knock him out, handcuff him to the end of the bed frame, and tell the woman that she needs to leave. It's only me and him… I… I point the gun at him, but… but I can't shoot him," she leans back in her seat and closes her eyes, "He laughed. He laughed and said that I didn't have the balls." Elliot winces at that statement, knowing it would trigger any woman. Olivia motions with her hands the repeated swings with the bar, "I took the bar and hit him. Over, and over, and over again…" She tilts her head and grins, "It was silent."

Thinking this was the end of the story, Elliot interjects, "Liv…"

Olivia turns to Elliot and looks at him dead in the eyes, "He survived."

Elliot thinks to himself, 'How is that even possible?'

"Lewis represented himself and said that what we had was consensual."

"Fuck that," Elliot blurts not realizing how loud he is.

Olivia's gaze softened as she sensed his concern, "I testified under oath that I had bludgeoned Lewis with the steel rod, and it had been necessary to incapacitate him, as he had managed to get free from his handcuffs… Which was a lie… He said that I was sexually obsessed with him and…" Olivia shakes her head and moves on, "Lewis was found guilty on the charge of kidnapping and assault of a police officer."

"That's all?" Elliot asks with grave concern.

"That's all…" Olivia nodded along. Elliot can feel that the story is not over and waits for her to continue. She takes a deep breath and resumes, "He escaped prison and called… called me. I missed you, sunshine… That's what he said." She shivers, "He kidnapped a girl. I needed to 'tell the truth' or the girl would die."

"Did you?" Elliot asks gently.

Ignoring Elliot she continues, "I went on television and I said that I had assaulted Lewis out of rage, rather than necessity. And that my admission had been made without coercion and by her own volition… He said I could go to him to get the girl…"

"Liv…" he knows the danger she would put herself in to save someone.

"I had nothing to live for, Elliot," she switches her attention to him, "Nothing. I had nothing."

Elliot nods his head trying to focus on not crashing the car and listening to her.

"He throws my phone away, takes my vest off, and takes my weapons… I had to choose… I had to choose between him raping the girl… or him raping… me…"

"Olivia…"

"I volunteered. He pressed himself against me and… and groped me…"

"Olivia, please…"

Olivia begins to disassociate, "I knew that he liked a fight. I knew that if I froze he wouldn't do anything. And before he could do anything he stopped."

Elliot watches her stay in her trance.

"He forced me to play Russian Roulette."

Elliot's heart sinks in his chest and his lungs stop working completely.

"He started with a blank. He slid it over to me. If I didn't do it myself, he would just shoot me himself. I pulled the trigger," Olivia's head jolts from muscle memory, "Blank. He took the gun back and got excited. Another blank. I could hear the helicopters over us, but he slid the gun back to me. Blank."

Elliot can see her shake from the corner of his eye. He doesn't know how to stop her.

"His turn… Blank. My turn…" Olivia puts her fingertips on her cheeks. She can feel the warmth of his blood return to her face, "Game over." She breathes out, "He shot himself." The warmth quickly turns to chills. Olivia stares out in front of her still in her trance. Elliot doesn't know how to help her snap out of it. He places his hand on her shoulder and lightly rubs it supportively. Bringing her back to reality, he sees her pupils dilate. Olivia quietly murmurs, "I think I need to take a nap…"

"Yeah," Elliot removes his hand swiftly allowing her to tilt her seat back, "Yeah…" Elliot doesn't know how to respond- to any of it. To the nap, to the attacks, to anything.

-oo0O0oo-

A/N: You have reached the end of the chapter. Congratulations! I will be touching upon William Lewis in the next chapter as well, just not have heavily. This chapter and the next should be the only chapters involving William Lewis.