Disclaimer: I do not own The Mr. Men Show or any of its characters, but I do own Little Miss Music.
Dark liquid builded in the fresh cut, and Little Miss Music watched as the blood rolled down her arm. It almost blended in with her skin color, but the blood glistened as it seeped out.
She winced a little at the pain, but at the same time it felt good. She hurt on the inside, so it made sense that she hurt on the outside. Already she made three cuts on her arm and she was feeling calmer.
There was still a nasty voice in her head, taunting her to make more cuts, but she decided to ignore it. If you made any more cuts, it would be more noticeable. It'll be hard enough hiding these. She cursed herself for making them so deep. They'll take longer to heal. She would just have to be super careful.
It was the first time she's hurt herself since she's been in Dillydale. For almost seven months now, she's been living a life she thought she could never have. She was now a Little Miss and she has met many of the characters that she at one point thought weren't real. She's even met her Senpai and has become close to him.
Yet every now and again she'll think about how miserable her old life became. Once she had been happy in the real world. She had been married to the love of her life. But then he met someone else and it all went downhill from there. He ended up leaving her the same year her grandmother and uncle passed away. When all that happened, she became very depressed and started cutting herself again like she used to when she was a teenager. It made no sense to her to feel pain in her heart and no physical pain so she hurt herself to balance things out. Only then can she calm down and feel like things made sense again.
It wasn't healthy. She knew that and she wished she didn't think like that but every time she was feeling really down, a voice would nag her until she hurt herself.
Since she has been in Dillydale, she has been able to ignore that voice. She's cried a few times when she thought about her previous life– once in the park and her Senpai spotted her and comforted her– but she had been able to fight the urge to hurt herself. Not this time.
She sighed and laid down on her bed. Her arm throbbed and she could feel the blood pouring out. But for a while she just relished the pain.
Then she heard a knock at her door and sat up, wincing at the sharp pain in her arm. She climbed off her bed and started toward the door but then froze. She needed to clean up and hide her cuts.
As quickly as she could, she washed the blood off her arm and pressed a towel to it to stop the flow of blood. Then she carefully picked up the broken glass and put it away. She hoped she wouldn't need to use it again but she never knew. She liked to have it in case she needed it.
Lastly, she put on a jacket to hide her arm. As she worked, whoever was at her door had knocked several more times. Finally, she went to answer it and she felt alarmed yet pleased to see her Senpai standing on her doorstep.
"Oh, Mr. Grumpy, h-hi," she stammered, instinctively hiding her arm.
He looked at her. "Kind of warm for a jacket, huh?" he asked.
"Oh." Her mind whirled. "It's cold in my room so I just put this on."
He narrowed his eyes, looking her up and down. Then he shrugged and said," I just thought I'd invite you to lunch."
Normally she'd jumped on the opportunity to hang out with her Senpai, but he was already suspicious of her wearing a jacket. And if she went out and got hot since it was summer, she wouldn't be able to take it off.
Regretfully, she shook her head. "I'm sorry, Mr. Grumpy," she said. "I think I might be coming down with something." She instantly wished she had come up with a different excuse because Mr. Grumpy immediately looked worried.
"Do I need to stay and take care of you?" he asked.
"No, no," she said quickly. A little too quickly because he looked startled. "I'm fine. I just need to rest."
He looked her over again. "Are you okay, Miss. Music?" he asked. He took a step toward her and she backed up. "You're acting really weird."
"I'm f-fine," she stammered. Again she instinctively hid her arm and this time he noticed.
"Is something wrong with your arm?" he asked.
"No!" she nearly shouted which only made him give her a dubious look.
"Can I see?" he asked, holding out his hand.
She hesitated. She didn't want him to see, but she was trapped. If she kept on insisting she was fine, he would keep on believing that she wasn't. But she isn't fine, right? Why else would she have cut herself and then lied to her Senpai?
Suddenly she bursted into tears and covered her face, sobbing. She felt him wrap his arms around her.
"Miss. Music, what's wrong? You can tell me."
She just cried for a long time and he let her. Then she sucked in a breath, wiped her face, and then pulled away from him. He watched her as she pulled up her sleeve, her hand shaking uncontrollably, exposing the cuts on her arm.
His eyes widened when he noticed the flash cuts. "What happened?" he demanded.
She forced herself not to break down again. She was already ashamed of herself for crying in front of her Senpai. "I… I made them," she whispered.
He gasped. "Why?" he asked.
She blinked at him. Why? she echoed in her head. Would he understand if she told him? It made sense to her that she needed to feel physical pain when she felt pain in her heart. But would it make sense to Mr. Grumpy?
She shook her head to clear it. "I… I don't really know why," she stammered after a while. "I just… felt like I had to…"
That voice again, urging her to hurt herself. She pushed it down. Seeing the look on her Senpai's face as he stared at her arm made her never, ever want to hurt herself again. She hated the pure shock on his face. The look of "I can't believe she did this to herself".
Finally, he looked up to meet her eyes. "I… I don't understand," he said quietly. Then he said urgently," Please, Miss. Music, please don't do this again." He stared at her. "Promise me you won't ever do this again."
She stared back, her mouth going dry. She couldn't speak. She felt horrible for making him so worried and maybe he was a little angry too, but she was also touched that he clearly cared so much about her that he was so upset that she did this.
When she didn't speak, he took hold of her hand and stared even harder at her. "Miss. Music, please promise me you won't do this ever again."
Finally, she was snapped out of it. "Y-Yes, I promise. I promise I won't do this again." She frowned and lowered her gaze. "I'm sorry, Senpai. I…" She trailed off, lost for words. She was surprised when he pulled her into a hug.
"Thank you, Miss. Music," he murmured. He took a step away from her and she was disappointed, wishing he could hold her forever. He took a deep breath and let it out. "If you ever feel the need to do that again, call me and I'll come right over. Okay?"
"Okay, Senpai," she murmured.
He looked at her. "Are you okay now?" he asked.
"I am," she replied honestly.
"Good. Now do you want to go get lunch or do you want to eat here?"
She thought about that. "I have leftover bean burgers if you want to eat here."
"Sure." He closed the front door that had been opened this whole time. Then he walked farther into her house. She followed him, love for him swelling in her heart. She was glad he obviously cared so much about her, but she felt guilty that she made him worry so much. She promised him she wouldn't hurt herself again, and now silently she made herself the same promise, determined to ignore the nasty little voice in her head that was trying to make her feel bad and make her cut herself.
She joined Mr. Grumpy in the kitchen, and helped him get the bean burgers from the refrigerator. He didn't say anything, but he glanced at her. She looked back at him and smiled and she even thought he cracked a tiny smile. But quickly he looked away and then finished fixing lunch. Little Miss Music felt happy and she got the impression that Mr. Grumpy was feeling content himself. She was glad to see him so peaceful, even though he was so worried about her only a short while ago.
I'll never hurt myself again, she promised. I never want Senpai to look at me the way he did when he saw the cuts. I'm sorry, Mr. Grumpy. I'm so sorry. I'll keep my promise this time, I swear.
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