Chapter 65: Flawed Guide to the Broken
It wasn't long before I noticed another living cat needing my attention. Down below in Shadowclan was a young apprentice, despised and ignored due to his heritage. I initially passed the kit by because there was still love directed at the kit from his mother and father, but love from afar and the love of the busy are loves that aren't often felt. Poor Brokenpaw. His mother could never reveal how much she cared for him, and his father was too burdened by the duties of leadership to make up for it. He had no siblings, no friends, and no parent to call his own. I decided to extend to him an offer.
Pushing the veil of unconscious thought, I hooked my paws into Brokenpaw's soul and reeled him up into the Darkforest to chat. His soul was heavier and darker than Tiny's had been, but I believed I could offer the apprentice hope and companionship that the living had scorned. I pulled him from the reflection pool and let him wake.
When his eyes opened, his fur rose, startled. It didn't take long for him to notice my presence and rise up in a hiss.
"Who are you!" He growled out.
I already felt that this cat was defensive, afraid of charity and being looked down upon. I acted in the way I thought would settle his mind, but in reflection, those actions cemented his path to one of darkness.
"Welcome to the Darkforest Brokenpaw. My name is Mapleshade, mother to this place. I've been keeping an eye on you. Those cats below hurt you, ignore you, and insult your blood. They have no right. I know the truth. You are a pure blooded Shadowclan cat. You did no wrong. I've come to offer you my aid."
Brokenpaw looked both startled and contemplative. The apprentice likely felt such aid would not come free. He'd heard of the Darkforest in whispers. It was widely known that the evil did not go to Starclan, but where they went was largely unknown.
"What do you get out of this? Why help me?" He asked sharply.
"I stand to gain much should you succeed. I will give you the affection and the training you require to achieve whatever your ambitions are. I'll teach you strength and leadership, but there is one thing I require. I care only about one rule." I mewed before turning to an aggressive growl. "Kits are off limits. I will aid you however you want, but if I witness you or those under your command harming kits, I'll cut you off."
When I'd given the offer, I'd believed it was the right option to term things that way. The apprentice was more likely to accept my aid as long as it was termed as a mutually beneficial deal.
"Fine. I'll accept your offer. I want to be leader, like my father. I want them to see me. I want to be strong." He mewed firmly.
"Then I will teach you strength. I will teach you how to speak to gain respect. I will be the mother you so desire." I responded, forcibly wrapping him in an embrace unfamiliar to him.
At first he resisted my affection, but I could feel his internal need. He soon settled down. He fell into sleep with a snarl still plastered on his face, but as the night continued, he snuggled deeper into my fur, craving the warmth of a mother. Soon, he'd be drawn back to the world of the living, but for tonight he had a mother watching over him.
Splitpelt made himself known to me while I was still wrapped around the feisty apprentice. "Mapleshade. I wish to take part in training this apprentice as well. Just like me, he's seen the darker parts of the clans. I will give him guidance when you cannot. He has potential for greatness, both good and evil."
I let Splitpelt's words wash over me. This apprentice, he was just as broken as his name implied. I could still feel his soul, constantly in turmoil, lashing out violently yet longing deeply. If he were just a soul, I'd have rolled him back to kithood to remove the foul memories. Unfortunately, he was alive. I couldn't just strip away what was wrong and reraise him. Even if I did, he'd just end right back up where we were now. I'd have to give all that the clan would not provide. The inner darkness of his heart, I'd have to guide onto a more benevolent path. This was a challenge I'd later find out was beyond my capabilities.
When Brokenpaw left, I left him with a small connection, just enough to send him a whisper if needed. When I saw him wake below, I saw a rare smile grace his face, wiping away my fears of the apprentice taking a dark path. The genuine smile fit him. Without that ever present scowl, he had a remarkably handsome face. Even that slightly off kilter tail had its charm with how it always seemed to skew slightly right. I left the reflection pool believing I had done well. I was not there to witness his mentor talking down to him or the cruel jeers sent his way by his fellow apprentices. I did not see that smile falter. I did not see him when he buried himself back in that façade, his face returning to that ever present scowl.
Even his living parents did not see him. They'd seen the smile he woke up with. They believed he'd finally gotten some hope. It was after that first insult was slung that that smile broke. The mother of the apprentice witnessed it all but could do nothing. Brokenpaw was dragged back into the cruelty of his life. If I'd known how things were going to turn out in the end, I'd have never let him leave after that first night. He'd have died in his sleep, and I'd have spirited away his soul to be rolled back and raised as one of my own. I am not a perfect guide, now will I claim to be. I am flawed, and it shows. The rise of Brokenstar will forever be one of my greatest failures, but we haven't got that far yet.