Chapter 7: Everyone Should Cry More
Typically, the Stolas mansion was dead silent, without even a single creaky floorboard to announce a living presence. It was as schrödinger's box; with everything in it could be dead or alive and you wouldn't know until you looked inside. At least, that's how it was on a usual day.
"Sh*t!" Stolas screamed, turning over furniture, "Blast it all to hell and up your father's *ss!"
Loona heard this from outside, but was busy looking up at just how big the mansion was, mouth agape. She traced her hand along the smooth curve of a pillar. D*mn, what was Blitz running from again?
Octavia, however, heard the expletives and approached with caution.
"That . . . Is unusual. Maybe wait on the doorstep? It's not that he would hurt you, I just don't want him to have an aneurysm if he realizes that you heard all that." Octavia said to Loona before she opened the door. She began sneaking through the palace, hearing crashing and the occasional curse from Stolas, only some of which made sense.
". . . Dad?" she peeked her head through the open door.
Stolas spun around so fast, his head had to catch up with the rest of his body, "V-Via! Darling! How long have you been home? Don't mind me, dear, I'm just doing some . . . cleaning! Yes, cleaning; I'm sorting things that need to be thrown out, and things to keep. You know how the saying goes, you gotta make a mess to clean a mess!" He said, before tripping over some books on the floor.
Via looked around at the overturned nightstands, sheets stripped off the bed, vanity drawers emptied of their contents, "Yeah . . . very organized sorting."
Stolas sighed, leaning against his bed frame which was now several meters away from where it usually was, "Alright, I'm looking for something I've lost. I'm sure I never took it out of this room. Still, it was a light blue envelope, if you see it, please give it to me directly, and for heaven's sake, do not open it. There are things in there that a young child should not read." He went back to looking around and rummaging through his own reckage like a maniac.
"I'm not a young child anymore." She said, leaning on the door frame.
Stolas paused his chaos to look her dead in the eyes, "Okay, then there are things in there that my child should not read. It was addressed to Blitz. I was never going to send it, of course. It was just an exercise advised by my therapist."
"You go to therapy . . .?" This was news to Via.
"I was planning on burying it in my garden, or perhaps throwing it poetically into a brimstone lake on a family trip together, but if I don't know where it is, then anyone could have gotten their hands on it. And just when you had specifically asked me to lay low in the media, too-" Stolas's eyes wandered over to where the grimoire usually was held on the shelf, ". . . Sh*t . . . I know where it is."
He began gathering his coat and barrelling past her..
"You mind if I have a friend over-?" Via called after him.
"Of course, darling! They can help themselves to whatever's in the fridge!" He shouted as he ran.
"Hi, Stolas." Loona smiled and waved as the prince ran out of the house.
"Hi, Loona. Sorry, not now." Stolas said without looking, "Where the devil is the car?!"
"Uhh . . . Don't you, like, portal everywhere?" Loona cocked an eyebrow up at him.
"Oh, right! Thank you dear!" He called back, and made a portal in front of himself.
Octavia walked over to Loona and they watched Stolas leave.
"Where the f**k is he going in such a hurry?" Loona asked.
"No idea, but he'll probably realize that you were here, later. At least the aneurysm will be someone else's problem. Come on, let's go."
If the outside of the building was shocking, then the inside was absolutely stunning. Every surface was marbled, gilded, or pure crystal and Loona couldn't help herself from wondering what the toilets were made out of. She suddenly felt herself feeling small, partially because she was used to being in places where everything was made for demon imps much smaller than her, and everything here was for demons who could reach up to 4 meters tall. . . Sh*t, would Octavia be that tall some day? She also felt small because this was the home of nobility, and she was entering it as a guest in frayed shorts and a crop top. Though she suspected that even if she was wearing the most lavish evening gown out there, she would still feel radically out of place. Afterall, as a hellhound, this may as well be a different planet.
The two went into Octavia's room which was decked out with cool band merch, astrological and horoscope paraphernalia, and a taxidermy human hand with rings and necklaces dangling from the fingers. Things were still fancy as hell, but Loona felt she could relax a bit in here.
"Sweet digs." Loona said as she walked in, "I like the hand."
"Um, yeah. Dad felt really bad about missing the meteor shower, so he told me he'd get me any taxidermy I wanted. I joked that a human hand would be dope, but he got it custom made for me." Octavia sat on her bed and smoothed out the creases in the covers, "And now that my mum's moved out, I'm allowed to decorate the deer however I want instead of within her limitations."
"Yeah, I get that." Loona remembered the days at the pound, with nothing for herself, "You seem to get along with your Dad now. Are you choosing his side?"
"That's kinda personal. . ." Via said.
Loona blushed a little, "Right, sorry. I didn't mean-"
"I'm not choosing anyone's side." Via continued, "The whole family situation is f**ked up to begin with. My mum is a little arrogant . . . and unreasonable . . . and she can be kind of cruel sometimes. And my dad is a little naive . . . and gets wrapped up in his own worries . . . But I don't hate them. And I don't think either of them are bad parents." Via sighed, "Maybe my mum's a bad person . . . I can see now that I've grown up. She used to play these pranks on our imp servants, and make fun of people, Dad included, and I would pretend to laugh, thinking maybe I just didn't get it . . . but I did get it. It just was never something a good person would laugh about. . . So yeah, I guess my mom is a bad person. I'm just the one she's somewhat nice too. Maybe 'cause she sees us as equals; above everyone else. But I . . . " Via started crying, "I don't want to be above everyone else."
Loona walked over to her, and knelt down to be on eye level with her, "Hey . . . I know that I have no room to talk about functional families . . . or moms . . . or just about anything when it comes to healthy relationships . . . But I think that being able to admit that to yourself, and how you really feel . . . that seems like a big step in the right direction."
Via nodded, still crying and Loona wasn't sure what to do. She tried thinking of what Blitz would do in this situation; probably make an awkward d*ck joke. But after . . .? Loona wrapped her arms around the little bird, and they spent a few minutes there, Octavia sobbing, while Loona rubbed her back.
"Ugh . . . sorry. I feel like every time we talk, I end up crying."
Loona giggled a little, "Honestly, I think it's a good thing to be able to cry when you need to."
Via looked at her confused, "Is that not a thing people know how to do?"
Loona stood up laughing, "F**k no! Have you seen imps and hellhounds crying, like ever? You gotta be tough on the streets." She jokingly threw out some gang signs.
Via laughed, "I guess so."
Loona smiled back at her, but then looked over her shoulder and spotted one of the posters, "What's this?"
Octavia walked over, "That's my star sign. I'm a Leo."
"Huh. Is that the mythology some human suckers believe about the stars determining your personality?"
"I guess some do, but I view it more as predicting your personality." She pulled out a book from a shelf, "I was born August 16th, so that means I'm a Leo. What day were you born? We can read what yours says if you want."
Via was flipping through the book when Loona said, "I don't know."
She stopped turning the pages, "Don't know what?"
"I don't know when my birthday is. I only know I'm 22 from the date I went to the pound. I know I was young, but I don't know if I was 'newborn pup' young." Loona paused when she saw the look on Octavia's face, "It's not a big deal. Blitz insists on getting me adoption day gifts instead. Besides, I'm an adult now, and from what I've seen, most of what adults do for their birthdays involve getting super drunk, and I can do that any day of the year."
Via suddenly felt a little self conscious about some of the things she was taking for granted, "Well, do you have a favorite number?"
Loona looked down at her, confused, "13, obviously. Why?"
Via turned through the pages, "Then, maybe your birthday can be November 13th."
Loona smiled, intrigued, "Why November?"
"You seem like a Scorpio to me. That's all." She shrugged and handed the book to Loona, hoping she looked cool, "So, you were telling me about your plan to get my Dad away from my cereal?"
"Oh! Right, yeah!" Loona walked over to Octavia's bed and motioned for her to sit.
Via blushed and made note in her mind to ask Stolas for some chairs in her bedroom.
"So, dumb*ss one and two aren't talking because they both think they've been rejected by the other, but you know what profile Stolas is using. So all we need to do is make a profile for Blitz, smooth talk Stolas and get them to meet up and make up." Loona pulled out her phone and began downloading the app.
"Wait, so you're going to be talking to my Dad . . . As Blitz? Are you sure that'll work?" Octavia sat down next to Loona and watched her make the profile.
"I think so, and it's all we've got, unless you've got a better idea." Loona didn't look up from the screen.
"No, but I do think it's a little . . . weird, you know? Having you catfish my Dad . . . even if it's in order to help him. Plus, I've heard him flirt with Blitz with me in the room, and I don't want to think about what he'd say when he thinks no one else will hear." Via looked uncomfortable just thinking about it.
"Relax. Trust me, I've heard some weird sh*t, too. But it'll be fine. If I read something that sounds D.T.F-y, I'll skip past it and just send a bunch of sweat droplet emojis back and change the subject. And, there!" Loona handed Via the phone, then layed back on the bed, "All done! All you have to do is find Stolas's profile and swipe right."
". . . Okay . . . If you say so." Via started swiping for a few minutes but before Loona knew it she was saying, "Found it."
Loona took the phone back and looked at it, "Pfft! Could you have chosen a name that screams f**kboi more?"
Octavia smiled, "It was from a random name generator. Anyway, now what?"
Loona smirked, "We send the first message."
Author's Note:
Hi everybody! VikTheViking here to answer some questions, and to spill the tea. Updates will now be Wednesdays and Saturdays. I will be dissolving all version 2 chapters and putting it in place of version 1, once I have the time, but it will probably take awhile. (If that didn't make sense then you are reading this in the future when I've already done it, so just ignore it.)
There will not be a at this point in time; it seems like more stress than it's worth right now.
What is in the envelope that was sent to Blitz? How will Stolas react to the fake Blitz account? What the heck is going to happen with Fizz and Blitz on the accidental date? I guess we'll see, won't we.
P.S. The date for Via's birthday comes from Vivziepop's semi-canonical instagram. I decided that star signs might be something that is only kind of known by hell's demons. Moxxie is very cultured and told Blitz all about it which is why they both understood his "I'm a Virgo." joke in season 1 episode 6. I chose Scorpio for Loona's possible horoscope, but I have very limited knowledge on the topic, so if you have a guess, go ahead and leave a comment if you'd like. (P.S. Almost everyone I talked to, asking their opinion, said that Blitz was a capricorn, despite that not being the question. Haha!)
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