Sirius made a small noise in the back of his throat, his palm warm against my hip. I wondered if our contact was as thrilling and settling for him as it was for me. He was rather bold, on any account. "Untethered?" he inquired, perplexed as the rest of us.
"English, Lils," James teased.
Lily rolled her eyes. "She's untethered to this ... reality, I suppose you might say. But that's not quite it. Pieces of Emma firmly exist with us right now, but she's slightly in flux. Because, the matter of her, her substance, it's foreign, new to space and time. There's no source or origin in her, no trace of ancestry or blood, dead or alive. I'm not sure she even existed a short time ago, not in any sense we would know," Lily declared, only mildly sober, as if she had diagnosed me with the common flu.
In a long-winded way, she had gotten it right, I mused, crossing my legs nervously. This world and this time wasn't my own. And it wasn't so far fetched that none of my relatives existed in this world. After all, there were no Dumbledores or Riddles in the real world.
James tapped his fingers against his tea-mug. "Emma, you mentioned you've seen Regulus before? That you met him in a dark cave before landing in Helmsley?" he queried, his long frame slightly tense in interest and anticipation.
The thought of the place sent ice slithering down my spine and I shivered. Where an emotional flush now colored Regulus's boyish face, I saw the ghost of his anguished grimace, heard his agonized screams. The air was turning solid, difficult to breathe in.
"We have a very big problem," I exhaled, nauseated. If Regulus was here now in 1981, before having gone to the cave, he wouldn't be in 1979 to retrieve the locket. And he wouldn't be there for me to save for that matter. And it had to be Regulus who went. Kreacher was the only one with knowledge of the locket's location and he was only loyal to his Master Regulus. I had no idea if I was able to go with him to the dark place full of inferi. Would the boat that traveled across the lake recognize the presence of two full-grown magic wielders and reject us? Would I even be able to transport us out? I certainly couldn't control my magic. I barely believed I possessed any.
"Shh darling, you're alright," Sirius spoke into my hair and I realized he was rocking me in his arms. Distantly, I noticed my breaths had become quick and shallow. I shuddered in one large breath, held it, then exhaled as I rested into the crook of Sirius's collarbone.
"I don't know how to protect him," I told the room brokenly.
"And who assigned you that duty?" Lily inquired evenly, her expression warm.
I blew a ringlet out of face in annoyance. "It's not duty! It's--he's just a boy, an innocent! He's ... he's my brother!" I exclaimed, suddenly livid. Sirius pressed his lips to my shoulder and I faltered, deflating.
Lily's palms were raised placatingly. "Emma," she said calmly, "I only meant the duty isn't yours alone. Regulus has all of us now. And from what you've told me, we already know his fate--he ends up alive and healed."
Regulus held a haughty expression, not uncommon to adolescents of his age. "Don't speak about me as if I'm not right here. I can make decisions for myself," he said, crossing his arms petulantly.
"I don't know mate," James said with a put-upon solemnity, "the birds seem to have much more handle of things than any of us blokes at the moment."
I winced apologetically at Regulus. "I, um, Regulus, it's not that I don't think you're capable, you well, I grew up knowing you as a hero, which you are but there's ... so much more is in play at the moment and I need to catch my bearings a bit," I told him.
Regulus beamed, his chest puffing out a bit in pride. I felt the rumble of Sirius's chest as he barked a small chuckle. He drew patterns on the back of my hand as he breathed into my ear, "absolutely perfect save, beautiful." I blushed thoroughly and ignored him.
Regulus hummed and looked at me. His gun-metal eyes were warm for the first time, trusting even. "So you're my new sister, eh?" he commented lightly.
I regarded him. Was I his sister? Strangely, the concept didn't feel foreign. No, the alabaster pale boy before me, slight but proud, felt like family. His refined but gangly movements felt familiar, like I had grown up watching him. I could anticipate his idiosyncrasies in the way only those who have grown up together can.
"Yes," I smiled, "I suppose I am."
"You're absolutely brilliant, my angel," Sirius crooned into my hair. I hid my face in his chest as a bashful reply.
"You're very ... affectionate," I murmured into his collarbone. His chuckle rumbled against my frame.
"And why shouldn't I be, beautiful?" he countered, lifting my chin, his fingers lingering against my jaw.
I avoided his eyes, fiddling with the hem of his t-shirt. I noticed my hands were still covered in soot and grime and let the cotton of his shirt slip through my fingers immediately.
"Because," I began again, "it's very ... distracting and, well, you barely know me. And um, yes, I barely know you for that matter. And I'm not an angel or gorgeous or any of those other things and it's not very nice to tease people and um ... lots of other reasons," I rushed out.
"She's trying to say you're driving her batty, brother. Probably that horrible stench of motor oil mate, always did drive all the birds away," Regulus quipped, dodging the pillow Sirius threw his way.
He tapped my cheek bone, eyes twinkling before speaking. "You are the most beautiful sight I've ever beheld, love. And you are most definitely my angel, dropping from heaven and bringing my lost brother back to me. But if my touch unsettles you, dove, say the word, and I'll back off," he intoned solemnly, like an oath.
My stomach flipped pleasantly at his words. "I um, that's alright then," I whispered, finally looking up. His eyes crinkled as he brushed a stray curl from my face. I was seized with the thought that I very much wanted to kiss him.
Lily broke me from the haze, placing two cups of tea before Sirius and me abruptly, along with a large plate of fruit. She plucked a blueberry from the spread, smiling knowingly before she popped it into her mouth. Though I had now made it clear I didn't mind Sirius as a pleasant distraction, I couldn't let his orbit fully deter me from the mystery before us.
"Lily, how do you know," I glanced at Regulus unsure of what to reveal, "how do you know what I told you will come to pass. It looks like things have changed to me," I said.
James frowned thoughtfully at Lily as she balanced herself on the arm of his chair. His arm wrapped around her middle absently as his eyes flickered between Regulus and me. Regulus had screwed his lips to the corner of his face in confusion.
Lily inclined her head thoughtfully, her red tresses falling on to James's shoulder next to her. "What has been experienced cannot be changed. You already met Regulus in 1979 and brought him to the Helmsley of today. It is presently your past and so it will always remain to be. What's happened has happened. You can't change the past because it's already your future," she explained.
I let out a frustrated huff, pressing a hand to my temple. "That's just it, isn't it? I'm not from here, this time or place. And Regulus, you're displaced in your own way now..." I turned to him, and he met my eyes with a mixture of bemusement and expectation.
There was a vulnerability in his gaze that belied his earlier bravado. "If what you say is true ... what does that mean? I was meant to die tonight wasn't I? Or what was tonight for me a few hours ago," he whispered.
The gravity of his words settled over my bones, weighing the marrow into lead. I had grown to care for him, this unexpected brother. The thought of losing him again, of Sirius losing him again. The eldest Black in question was ashen, his square jaw ticking. I knocked my forehead against his cheek gently and he kissed my hair.
"No, Regulus. Emma was meant to rescue you from your fate and she did. You just haven't experienced it yet," Lily soothed, her eyes dimming in a gentle sadness as they fell on Sirius.
Disbelief lingered in my chest and limbs, battling with the living warmth circulating in my blood. Regulus straightened, his posture lofty and sure. "It's alright, Emma. I trust you," he said, and there was something so raw and honest in his voice that it seemed to resonate with the very walls of the room.
I reached toward him, this brave young boy, and took his hand in mine, a gesture meant to comfort us both. The moment our skin touched, his eyes blew wide, steel glinting. Icy hot vibrations burned through my veins as I folded against Sirius, my hand immovably fixed in Regulus's.
I heard cries of surprise and concern, but gold light was blinding in my vision and their voices seemed to come from far away. A chill sifted through my curls before a firm pressure behind my eyes forced them closed. The room, the chatter, the faces—all faded away before images flashed behind my eyelids, unbidden.
October 31st 1981. An explosion spewing concrete. A severed finger bouncing off a bloody rodent into muddy soil. Green light and red hair splaying in air, a champagne glow leaking from the auburn. A small boy with verdant eyes and raven hair, leaning sadly against an oak tree in a manicured garden. A high, cold scream chilling the air before expiring.
Then only gold, brilliant and scorching. I fought against the pure force of it and opened my eyes. Regulus was fading like mist, his face stiff with terror. I blinked at him dazedly and heard someone calling desperately into my ear.
"Emma! No! Not now angel, not now. Don't leave me now. Don't let go. Lily, someone! Help, please!"
But the world around me was swiftly melting away into thin liquid and I was floating, floating into soft blackness.