Chapter 5

In the past several years serving on Enterprise, Commander T'Pol had attended a sufficient number of movie nights to know that it was standard practice for human females to consume large amounts of an unhealthy confection known as ice cream after a break up. They would then assemble a group of embittered females to commiserate with as they jointly purged the material possessions that were significant representations of the relationship. At least that's what she had observed from the romance genre films she had watched. Truthfully, she failed to understand how an overly sugary substance full of saturated fat, lactose and glucose and discarding possessions which are no longer relevant would have an effect, but the human females in the crew's audience seemed to laugh knowingly at those parts. In any case, she had hoped such a course of action was unnecessary and that she and Trip could mend what had been broken between them.

Compartmentalizing those thoughts, it was nearing the hour for the Captain's dinner and she unceremoniously began to execute her duties to prepare and tried not to dwell on the fact that Trip would be there and it would be difficult to focus. After the dinner, she would speak with him and attempt to deal with Koss, assuming he was still in a cogent state. She had hoped that the outrageousness of the request wasn't a sign that Koee was already too far gone in the blood fever to deal with. She and Trip were not merely lovers. They shared a bond that was as true and deep as any Vulcan pairs' bond could be. Once Koss realized this, he would surely relent. He most certainly would not have suggested the Idea if he knew. Aside from Phlox, no one else knew of the existence of the bond between them and they had hoped to keep it that way. It was a necessity in order to maintain their positions aboard Enterprise. She hoped Kiss would maintain discretion.

There was one thing for certain. T'Pol would not relent. She neither would not, nor could not. She might need to sever all ties with Vulcan, essentially no longer be accepted as a Vulcan, but she would not mate with Koss under any circumstances. She had wanted to convey as much to Trip to reassure him. When she reached out in the bond, she could sense his need to be alone for the moment and she needed to respect that. She had shown him so little respect already since they discovered they were bonded, she admitted to herself abashedly. If they were to continue their relationship, they would need to forge a different path forward. She mused that she could teach him how to shield his thoughts at will and allow him greater access to her own. This could level the circumstances between them and would likely have a beneficial effect.

For now though, she would need to ensure the dinner plans were faithfully executed to the Captain's standards. She had checked in with Chef for a status report. As usual, he had exceeded all expectations and selected a menu for the occasion that was sure to please even the most discerning of palates. She would recommend him for a commendation when the dinner concluded. When she was satisfied that the Captain's dining room was fully prepared for the occasion, the intercom chirped. Ensign Sato's competent voice was at the other end, notifying T'Pol the dining party had arrived. She was to rendezvous with Captain Archer in his ready room and then together, they would meet them in the transporter room and escort them to dinner.

She walked through the ship's winding corridors and made her way to the bridge expeditiously. She was punctual as always and opened the door, noticing the Captain in his dress uniform tugging at the collar.

"This damn collar is going to choke me," he grumbled irritatedly.

She knew the Captain was given to fits of hyperbole when he was stressed and so she knew better than to be concerned about his airway patency. There was a time she struggled with these unique human turns of phrase, but she reflected she had progressed in fostering a mutual understanding and an ease of communication with her human crewmates. Hopefully this conference could do the same for the delegates and bridge the divide between them. The Captain placed a great importance on this.

"All the plans have been set and will surely be satisfactory for a successful evening. I'm sure Admiral Gardner and Minister Samuels will appreciate the effort," she reassured him.

Archer smiled at her and nodded. He motioned for her to progress through the door en route to the transporter room ahead of him. They walked in lockstep towards their destination.

"You are quiet tonight," the Captain observed. "Everything alright?"

"I'm fine, Captain." She said stoically, her mask fully in place, not betraying the inner turmoil she was experiencing.

He scrutinized her carefully. He had long been able to see through that line, but knew her well enough that prodding her about it would only cause her to respond with more Vulcan stoicism. In any case they had arrived in the transporter room. Whatever it was would have to wait.

Almost on cue Admiral Gardner and Minister Samuels materialized synchronously on the transporter pad.

"Welcome aboard Admiral, Minister," the Captain greeted their guests warmly.

"Jon." Admiral Gardner nodded and shook hands firmly with the Captain.

"Minister, we are delighted you could join us ahead of a momentous occasion. I thought perhaps you would enjoy a tour of the ship before dinner?"

"I would like that," Samuels said smiling.

Archer nodded and escorted them out of the transporter room. He always enjoyed seeing his ship through another person's eyes for the first time and this was no exception. She was a beauty.

Commander Tucker usually would have been pleased with the status of the repairs that had already been completed in Engineering. The work was proceeding ahead of schedule and ordinarily he would have been satisfied. But even the steady pulse of a perfectly tuned warp core could not bring him solace right now. There was strangely not much to do but await the boarding party's arrival. Maybe he could have a talk with Masaro about his performance while he waited. It would give him something to do and he sure could use the distraction. He searched for him over by the plasma manifolds where he was supposed to be. Trip could not find the young ensign anywhere. But maybe that was for the best with the mood he was in.

He felt the group approach by way of the bond. To his surprise, it was open and flowing freely should he wish to make contact.

Did he?

He had handled their last conversation like a total jackass. He was already regretting it. He knew T'Pol would never lie to him, so why did he even suggest that she had? He started thinking about the issue with Koss from her perspective and how this was affecting her. The fact that Koss would attempt this after dissolving their marriage was unbelievable. He thought of trying to make contact with her, but did not want to risk creating more tension in the presence of the Captain's guests. Duty would have to take precedence over his heart at the moment.In the meantime, he busied himself with checking the maintenance logs and was surprised to find some entries missing for the Shuttlepod maintenance. He would check with Kelby later.

The doors of Engineering hummed to life and in walked the Captain, Admiral Gardner, Minister Samuels. Her beauty nearly bewitched him as always. Their eyes met but before he could be entranced by her, he remembered his duty and snapped to attention.

"Captain, Admiral, Minister, Commander." he acknowledged perfunctorily .

"At ease, Commander," Jon smiled. Turning towards Minister Samuels, he introduced him to Trip. "This is my Chief Engineer, Commander Charles Tucker III."

"A pleasure to make your acquaintance, Minister." Commander Tucker welcomed.

"Likewise," the man extended his hand and shook it firmly.

Trip gestured for the group to follow him around and competently began explaining how the warp engine worked, his engines and department a source of great pride.

After several minutes, Samuels interrupted with, "I'm sure this is all fascinating, Commander, but the lovely lady here was about to escort us to dinner. I'm sure she worked real hard on dinner–although I'm not sure we should be leaving a Vulcan in charge of Earth cuisine." He laughed indelicately.

The overt misogyny and bigotry did not land well on Trip's ears, but before he could respond, the Captain was on it.

"Commander T'Pol is an excellent first officer and science officer. Her unparalleled work was indispensable when we neutralized the Xindi threat. I'd trust her with my life, let alone my dinner." Jon said, smiling tightly.

For her part, T'Pol was unflappable as ever, but exchanged a meaningful look with Trip urging him to remain calm. His minute head nod was indiscernible to all but her and then he averted his gaze.

As they moved onto dinner together, the minister lingered a moment to walk behind T'Pol to appreciate the view which did not go unnoticed by Trip who wanted to make contact between his fist the man's salacious expression, but there she was urging him to have restraint. He followed the group, and "accidentally" bumped shoulders with Samuels, which sent the man off balance to the extent that he had moved several feet forward, in front of T'Pol. "My apologies Minister. I'm still recovering from some recent injuries. My balance is still a bit off," Trip explained, smiling disingenuously. The Captain turned around and looked at him, brow furrowed.

"It's no trouble, Commander." Samuels responded obliviously.

Satisfied all was well, Jon cleared his throat which Trip knew he intended as a warning for him to be on his best behavior, and then they continued down the corridor together.

Trip could tell already they were in for a long night.

After an hour had passed, Trip looked across the table longingly at the bottle of bourbon he spied across the table. He needed a drink to make it through this dinner, but he needed to maintain his self-control for the Captain's sake more. So much was riding on this conference, so the bourbon would have to wait, he sulked inwardly. His tolerance for the Minister's excessive self-aggrandizing drivel was waning rapidly. Trip had never met a man who was more hellbent on talking solely about himself and his own accomplishments. When Admiral Gardner steered the conversation to the Enterprise's involvement in stopping the Xindi threat, Samuels responded by changing the subject to how his own actions on Earth were equally instrumental during that time. One would have thought he was the one who had brokered the peace in the Expanse as he succeeded in minimizing the sacrifices, tremendous risks, and losses the crew had sustained. It was enough to make anyone who had served aboard Enterprise during that time livid.

When he sensed another braggadocious story coming on, Trip could no longer pretend to engage with the man as if he was interested. The Captain and Admiral Gardner had it covered with the polite head nods and tight smiles. Instead, Trip's thoughts turned inwards to his own. The first thought which bubbled up to greet him as usual was just what hell he was going to do with this utterly messed up situation with T'Pol.

I, too, am eager to resolve our issues.

There she was reaching tentatively for him in the bond. There was so much to say that he could not put into words at the moment. His love for her, first and foremost, his despair that they could not seem to catch a break, his anger about Koss's demands, his frustration with her for not immediately rejecting the idea, his irrational jealousy of a man who had been married to her when they belonged to each other. He knew if he gave into these emotions, it would affect her through their bond and he did not want her to become overwhelmed in front of the others, so he willed himself to remain calm. During their neuropressure sessions, she had taught him how to regulate his emotions. When he felt the swell abate, he tentatively reached for her and projected a single thought.

I'm looking forward to that.

It was a simple statement, but to her at this moment it was everything. It was hope–a light in the darkness calling her home. When this was over, they would talk. The two continued with their dinner, each now having the fortitude to endure it together.

Together, they could endure anything.

Author's note: Wow, the last chapter really irritated a bunch of you! I will say a few things though. 1. I do not know it was necessarily established that Koss' cycle was a few years ago during Breaking the Ice. T'Pol does not divulge this to Tucker during their conversation at least. It's possible he dealt with this on his own. It is possible he didn't have it then either. 2. No one knows about the bond between Trip and T'Pol and to make the bond known to others would likely have a detrimental effect on their careers. 3. The Vulcans in this series are quite biased against humanity based on the many Vulcans depicted on the show who do not think highly of humans. It would take time even after the discovery of the Kir'Shara to undo these biases. We see that Spock endures ridicule and teasing for his half human heritage 100 years later. T'Pol's concerns about being cast out would be valid.

4. This story is not implying that baby Elizabeth is a result of a secret Koss/T'Pol pregnancy. I can't say much more about this without spoiling the story. 5. In this story (but not in canon) the strain on the bond could not be caused by the revelations of T'Pol's addiction or Pa'nar syndrome because Trip has already been privy to this and accepted it by way of the mind meld they shared in my last story. Regarding her not telling him about Kal-i-fee, that's a great story idea. I hadn't thought of that. Someone should write one. This is not a defensive response, I welcome your thoughts. It's nice to hear from others who enjoyed this show and also wanted more for its ending.

Anyway thanks for your feedback and I hope you stick with it even if is not your cup of tea. I have a plan--which you are entitled to enjoy or despise. I promise it won't be as bad as TATV.