"I'm not that heavy," I chuckled as I got off her. I don't want to strain her back. I suppose the night is quite nice today. The walk was calm. It was the closest to enlightenment after 7 years of abstracted visions of a fake glory, but to say that I'm enlightened would be a far-fetch. I love my family, and because of that, I don't want them to know where I am. We got inside the house and I jumped on the couch. Lily sat on the floor with her back to the couch. I rested my head on the couch end. The ceiling is ugly. Silence. Deafening silence. It was awkward. I guess it is to be expected. 7 years astray and met again in some old place far away. That rhymes wow! Fuck it. I need to tell her what happened.

"Lily-" I wanted to say but she cuts me off first.

"You're probably wondering how I found you in the first place," Lily cuts my sentence by its neck. I shut my mouth. "Believe it or not, I actually found you on YouTube," She looked at me with a smile. "I forgot the title but it sounded something like '10 celebrities that disappeared from the face of the earth', it was clickbaitey enough for me that I actually watched the entire thing. You were on the number one spot and he showed this grainy as fuck picture of you 'presumably' entering the Number 6 bus on the Oregon Mount Hood Trail. After that part's just luck. I got off the bus, at every single stop along the way and finally stopped here in the Great Green Jewel of Oregon, Anderson. And the first thing I saw here were police cars and a very angry lesbian sister of mine, well former lesbian, I don't know what you fuck these days. Then I just decided to follow you home, and knock on your door like a damn Christmas Caroler!" Lily trailed long. I laughed. It had been a while since I get to hang out with a sister of mine like this. I like it. I wish it stayed like this forever. "So, that's how I got here,"

"Let me get this straight, you tracked me down from some dodgy YouTube video, got on a bus from Michigan to Oregon, and went town to town searching for me in less than a week?" I asked. It sounded too good to be true. "How the fuck is that even remotely plausible?" I slapped my leg as I tried to control myself from laughter. How the hell did she manage that?

"I don't fucking know," Lily laughed. "What I do know is that Lincoln's NSA and PI friends can't track you down, and Lisa's algorithm couldn't find you, so genius inventor and a publishing house tycoon: zero, dumb blonde that had unsafe sex: one." She joked. I know she wanted to joke, but that last thing made my smile fade. Fuck.

"You have to tell them about it," I blurted. Fuck. Why did I say that?

"...you're right..." Lily sighed. Her smile faded. "I'm just afraid... you know... I don't know what they'll say... I don't know..." I saw tears starting to run down her face. Fuck. I got off the couch and sat beside her. I guess I wanted to comfort her. It's awkward. I don't know how. I put my right arm on her shoulders and I pulled her closer to me. It's so fucking awkward. She started crying. Fuck. "I don't know what to do Luna!" She cried.

"It's alright sis," I tried to comfort her, but I don't know how. "We'll- we'll figure it out, together," I said. I guess today's not the day I'll tell her it. Fuck it. "Fuck it." I sighed. "We're going home next week, I'll come too alright," I said. She looked at me, her eyes wet with tears. It had been too long. I don't know what'll happen, I don't care what happens to me. I just want to make sure that Lily's fine. Might be the last thing I can do for my family before I die. I just hope that everything will be fine.

"Thanks Luna," Lily sobbed into my shoulder. I don't know what I'm doing.

Capital Region International Airport, Michigan...

"All flights are suspended due to uncontrollable weather until further notice, we apologize for the inconvenience," The speakers said as Lincoln and Lori got out of the boarding hall. Groans and complains from the people resonated through the entire airport as if it was an early 90s sitcom.

"Fucking hell, any plans Linc?" Lori asked as she pulled her luggage handle up.

"I can drive," Lincoln said.

"For three days straight? Be realistic," Lori slammed her palm into her face. "How the hell did you become an owner of a Fortune 500 company?" Lori groaned.

"I'm being realistic, we can take turns driving, 8 hours me, 8 hours you. 3 days is 72 hours, that means that on average we only need to drive 36 hours each. It's doable with enough coffee," Lincoln replied. His car keys jangling in his hand. "I mean, if you're not coming I can go alone,"

"Fuck it. Let's just do it," Lori sighed.

The night sky is so damn peaceful. Lily's asleep on the couch. I stood there at the balcony, armed with a cigarette and a bottle of beer. What the fuck am I doing with my life? I took a sip from the glass bottle. It doesn't make me feel that rush I used to feel back then. Why am I even drinking? It never did me good. I looked at the labels on it. It's no use. I sighed. I looked out into the tall trees from this third floor fire hazard asbestos hell. I'm gonna die anyways. Why not live more? No. I can't. Not after what I did. I don't deserve that life. With the cash I have on me, the savings I got from working with Jimmy, the cash from the gigs, maybe I could get a car. I looked inside, and I saw Lily peacefully sleeping on the couch. Fuck. I don't care what happens to me. I don't know what'll happen to her, I don't know what they'll say about her, I don't know. But at least, maybe I can help her just a little bit. The least I could do to pay back the debts I have with my family. One final act of redemption. I took my last sip from the bottle and I sat the half burnt cigarette in my ashtray. I got inside, I grabbed the phone and I sat on the dinner table. I have to do it.

I punched the number in, and the line connected.

"It's been a while," I said. I don't care what happens to me anymore, I just want to make sure she has something to rely on.

"Luna wake the fuck up." Lily shook me. I got my head up, drool was dripping down my mouth. My back hurts. Damn it, I slept on the table. What the fuck? Am I in middle school or something? A headache struck me like thunder. Fuck. I groaned. It's getting worse I assume. "You looked dead, you got me worried for a moment there,"

"What time is it?" I asked as I tried to make my face look as unfazed as possible. I got up, my legs felt wobbly.

"Almost 9," Lily replied as she pulled on a laundry basket out. "I washed your clothes, go take a damn bath, you smell like a slut,"

"Why so early?" I groaned. "And how the hell do you know what a slut smells like?" I asked.

"That's not the point, you smell, go take a bath," Lily demanded as she passed me a towel. It smelled nice, better than what I usually had.

"Where did you get detergent?" I asked.

"I bought it, with your money. I'm not a 5 year old, I know how shops work," Lily replied as she sat on the couch. "Also, I'm borrowing your clothes, I don't have a lot," Lily said.

"Yeah, whatever." I said as I got up and went to bathroom. Just as I closed the door, I heard her shout from the living room:

"Don't forget to use soap, you fucking caveman!"

I'm starting to regret some life choices. I chuckled. At least it feels better this way. But I still am not forgiven. I can't be forgiven for what I did.

I twisted the shower knob, and I felt the warm water raining down on my body. It felt good. It haven't felt good for so long. It was so good, I almost cried. I grabbed the bar of soap on the soap holder and I rubbed a good chunk on my hand. It felt great. I miss this odd feeling. I smiled. It felt nice. It was one of the longest baths in a while. I got out of the shower with a towel wrapped around my body. Lily was on the couch, staring at the ceiling. She must be bored.

"Luna, is there anything to do around here? I'm bored as hell," Lily moaned. I was spot on. Damn. Look at us, we're bonding. Fuck.

"There isn't much to see here, there's an abandoned theater down the road. A bunch of teenagers playing in front usually, they don't go to school I think, some dropouts. Other than that, there isn't much to do around here," I said fastly. There's something to live for.

"Damn, you're talking a lot today, are you alright?" Lily asked as she sat up.

"I'm absolutely fine, very great actually," I replied as I put on my clothes. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Because yesterday you were Fuck-Life-Fuck-Everything-Luna, and today you're Not-Too-Fucked-Luna," Lily replied, emphasizing on the fucks.

"Why, I can't be Not-Too-Fucked-Luna?" I asked as I grabbed my wallet and shoving it inside my pocket.

"You can be Not-Too-Fucked-Luna, it's just very uncanny," Lily replied as she got up.

"Then the case is closed. Diner?"

"Diner."

The door slammed shut, and we went straight for the diner.