A/N: Harry's mind is damaged and it effects him greatly. However, he is very powerful and finds magic easy, mainly due to his extremely strong will. I don't know what I was thinking when this idea hit me. I abandoned it at one point but then had more inspiration and expanded it more, pulling it out of my abandoned story folder. I've had plans for how to end it since I came up with the idea. I just need to get all the middle written first which apparently is my hold up. The story was not meant to be long but getting it completed has been a big struggle. I really do believe my muse is on drugs.

The Mind of Harry Potter
by Roff

ONE

Harry Potter was born with a powerfully strong will. The first word he ever learned was 'no.' Think of a strong-willed child and all the books out there on how to raise one. Well, Harry was the poster boy for it. It was a good thing… sometimes.

At the age of fifteen months, the Dark Lord Voldemort killed his parents before the evil wizard turned his wand on Harry. What Voldemort didn't know was the mother he just killed provided protection for her son using Old Magic and the Killing Curse that worked perfectly on the boy's parents failed when used on Harry Potter.

It not only failed, it backfired, bouncing off the toddler's protection and onto Voldemort where it struck him down with his own curse. This was bad news for the Dark Lord but not as dire as one would think. You see Voldemort being the evil Dark wizard that he was, created horcruxes and was intent on creating the last one with the killing of Harry.

Having performed the needed incantation before murdering the toddler the horcrux was ready to be created. When the Killing Curse failed to kill the innocent little boy and killed its caster instead, the horcrux went into the boy instead of the artifact Voldemort brought for that purpose. Having no ability to protect himself against such Dark magic, the piece of soul that broke off of Voldemort entered Harry's young body and immediately began an assault to control the boy.

For those unfamiliar with the term horcrux you should know that it's a piece of a witch or wizard's soul that is broken off when the caster murders an innocent person. Then with the proper Dark ritual, the soul shard is directed into a container that is to be kept safe should the caster ever die. With a part of his or her soul anchored to the earthly plane, the witch or wizard cannot pass on and remains tied to the earth. Once they regain another body through various means they can live normally again.

Of course, tearing your soul asunder can lead to very bad consequences.

The soul piece that latched onto Harry was part of one of the most powerful Dark wizards to ever exist and it recognized its host as a living being. Naturally, it wanted to be in control. What it did not count on was the strong will of its new host. No matter how hard Voldemort's soul shard tried to subdue the consciousness of the very young Harry Potter, it was met with just as strong of a refusal. If there was one word little Harry knew very well, it was the word 'no.'

Harry's parents recognized the strong will of their child and were very happy for it, especially since he also was going to be a very powerful wizard. It was a challenge for them but as long as they showed him all the love they felt for him, then everyone got along fine. However, they knew that a strong will was beneficial for a wizard and it would make it easier for their son to perform magic when he was older. Due to that, they were not overly concerned about his exceptionally strong will. They just continually made sure he knew how much they loved him. He was then happy to do what they wanted since he loved them back just as much.

The occasional stubbornness was met with laughter and all would be well after that.

From the day of the attack forward, a great battle was waged between two very powerful forces, each too stubborn to give in to the other. It was like the unstoppable running into the immovable, neither one giving ground. As a fifteen-month-old, Harry had a lot to learn but he was adamant about maintaining the battle over the control of his mind.

Little did he know how much that constant activity was strengthening his own mind and his resistance to intrusion.

After his parents were killed, he was placed with his mother's sister, her husband, and son. His cousin was Harry's same age. It was obvious from the start that Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia were not too fond of little Harry. You see they were not magical like Harry and were afraid of magic. What made it worse were the times Harry would just stare at nothing at all, not saying a word.

They of course were unaware of the struggle going on inside his mind.

When Harry reached the age of three his Uncle Vernon, a bigoted brute of a man, had passed his boiling point and started beating Harry often. If he caught him staring off into space, he would kick him or hit him. He called Harry's behavior unnatural. He even encouraged Harry's cousin Dudley to physically hurt the smaller boy. Harry's Aunt Petunia was not much help either. She wouldn't try to stop her husband or son from hurting Harry and would even slap him herself if he didn't pay attention.

These attacks on Harry's person happened on a regular basis, usually daily.

The older he got the more Voldemort pushed Harry to let him have control. He would tell the boy what he would gladly do to his relatives if he would just step aside. Harry still refused, leaving the piece of soul shouting angrily at him for being so stubborn. Harry could sense that this other entity was evil and would likely be worse than his relatives if he ever let him loose. No. He would keep that monster shut down if it was the last thing he ever did.

Steadily over the next three years, Harry's attacks increased both inside and out. After he turned six his magic, which was very powerful, began to show itself in obvious fashion. This enraged his stupid uncle even more. One day, after a burst of accidental magic that sent his cousin flying into the wall, Uncle Vernon grabbed Harry by the arm and shook him violently until it broke. Next, he threw him down on the floor, and then began kicking him for all he was worth. Dudley had been hitting and kicking Harry when Harry's magic lashed out. Sadly, Dudley was just following the example set before him by his father.

Vernon was so angry and out of control his only goal was to beat his poor nephew to death and left unchecked he would have succeeded.

Voldemort took this opportunity to mount his strongest attack yet. While the boy was distracted by his uncle trying to kill him, maybe he could succeed this time in taking over then show that big ape of man just what real pain feels like. He made his move and pushed as hard as he could.

Harry was in pain from his cousin and now it was far worse from his uncle. His arm was killing him and his side was in even more pain from the kicks. He heard bones breaking both times with his arm and his side. He didn't think he was going to survive this time.

The next thing he knew the evil one inside him started pushing for control. Given his state of mind, he was afraid that this time the evil would succeed. Harry held on for as long as he could hoping his uncle would tire out and stop before it was too late. However, Vernon and Voldemort went way too far this time.

That's when Harry's mind, in a final effort to protect him, just snapped.

Then with one last ditched effort before he passed out Harry released as much magic as he could, intent on destroying everything and everyone hurting him and trying to control him. The explosion was felt for miles and alarms went off at the Ministry of Magic as they sensed an extreme use of magic.

When Harry woke up, he found himself in a pristine landscape. He sat up from the ground and looked around. He spotted a small form near him that was laying on its side underneath a tree. It was moaning and trembling as if in pain.

Somehow, he knew that was the evil presence that used to be within himself. The one he had been fighting for control for as long as he could remember. Its presence had the same feel to it, one of evil.

Harry stood and realized he was in different clothing. The clothes were nice and fit him perfectly, unlike the ones his relatives always provided for him to wear. They were always his cousin's cast offs. His cousin was twice his size so the clothes that Dudley outgrew was still too big for Harry.

He noticed he had no pain or any blood on him from the attack. His bones were not broken either.

Then he saw a pretty young woman approaching him. She had dark red hair and green eyes just like his own. He suddenly felt she was familiar and had fleeting flashes of memory with her and a black haired young man wearing glasses. He looked a lot like himself but older, Harry was thinking. The images were of them talking to him and playing with him.

When she reached Harry she just stopped and stood looking at him. Harry looked up at her in wonderment from the memories he experienced.

"Harry!" she exclaimed. "My darling boy!" she said with tears in her eyes. "Come and give your mum a hug?" she asked.

"Mummy?" Harry asked.

She nodded her head and held her arms out to welcome him.

Harry suddenly realized he must have died from his uncle beating him and the evil presence attacking his mind. He was finally going to be away from his hateful relatives and be able to see his parents again. With that realization solidifying in his mind, he rushed the few steps forward and embraced his mother, hugging her as hard as he could.

"Oh my baby!" she exclaimed as they hugged. "I know you've had a rough time with my sister and her brute of a husband but that's over now. They can never hurt you again, sweety.

"Come. Let's sit down and talk for a bit," she told him after they quit hugging. "We have lots to discuss, Harry."

She led him over to a tree further away from the evil soul shard of Voldemort, but they could still see it. They both sat down next to each other.

"Where's Daddy?" Harry asked looking up at her.

"He wanted to come too but only one of us was allowed to do this. Being your mother, I won out and was the one that got to see you again."

"Oh well, I guess I'll see him a little later then."

"Yes, but it will be much later before you get to see him" she told him.

"Why? I'm dead right? Why would it take so long?" he asked.

"You're a special case, Harry."

Harry looked at her like he didn't understand.

"Let me explain. You see, technically you did die, but when a person dies it is common for one soul to move on due to that death. One death requires one soul. But in your case you died with two souls, actually it was a soul and one incomplete soul.

"Because the incomplete soul is unnatural and goes against all that is right, that is the soul that will have to move on. It will not be allowed to return and cause nothing but evil in the world. It's your soul that gets to return so you can continue to live your life."

"But I don't want to go back to the Dursleys. They hate me!" he exclaimed.

"Remember what I said before?" she asked him patiently. "They will never hurt you again. You know why?"

Harry shook his head no, as he still looked worried.

"They all died, Harry. The explosion brought down the whole house. It didn't just kill you, it killed all three of them too. You will never have to live with them again."

"I killed them?" he asked worriedly.

"Oh, Honey, it's not your fault. What you did was an accident. You actually saved far more lives. If Voldemort had taken control of you then he would have used your body to kill thousands. Your last ditch effort to stop him was the best thing you could possibly do and you succeeded.

"That part of Voldemort will never hurt another person. In fact that piece of soul will not like where it will be kept until all parts of it are reunited. Voldemort broke the rules by splitting his soul many times and he will suffer for it in the end."

Harry just nodded but was still unsure how he felt about being the cause of his relative's deaths. He didn't feel bad at all about the part of Voldemort he destroyed. That evil had been attacking his mind for far too long.

"Harry, we're running out of time and I have something very important to tell you before you return to life."

"What is it?" he asked curiously as he looked back up at her.

"When you caused the explosion with your magic, it was due to your mind snapping from all that was attacking you. It was too much for your young mind to endure, being severely attacked physically and mentally at the exact same time. Both were trying their hardest to kill you."

Harry nodded remembering.

"The important part to remember when you go back, is that your mind snapped. You will be different because of that. Please, do not give up hope. You will eventually find the solution to fix your mind. You will be very powerful in many ways so make your parents proud and do your very best to learn to control all that power. Use it to help people and better yourself.

"Do you think you can do that for me, Sweety?" she asked him as she squeezed him closer to her.

"I'll do my best, Mummy."

"Okay, give me another hug. It will have to last me for a long time before we see each other again."

They both stood and hugged each other for a long time. Then Lily too a step back with her hands remaining on Harry's shoulders.

"Now, Harry, I need you to just stand there and close your eyes. You will wake up back in your body."

Harry looked up at his mum. "I love you, Mummy," he told her with tears in his eyes.

"I love you too, Sweetheart. I'll be here for you when it's really your turn many, many years from now. Close your eyes, Harry."

Harry closed his eyes and felt his mum's hands disappear from his shoulders.

Then he knew nothing.

Harry woke up in pain.

He found himself surrounded by Number 4 Privet Drive, only it was in ruin. The whole thing was nothing more than a pile of sticks with pipes broken and spouting water. Even the furniture was destroyed. Nothing was left standing.

He saw his uncle's body near him and his aunt's body near Dudley's. None of them were moving or breathing it looked like. Slowly Harry stood and stumbled his way over the rubble and out across the grass of the front garden until he reached the curb where he slowly sat down, holding his broken arm and his side carefully.

Every breath was a struggle.

The neighbors had all come pouring out of their houses looking at the destruction in awe. Harry didn't even notice them. Mrs. Figg had run up to Harry and called his name but he didn't respond at all. He just stared out at nothing with blood showing in many places on him.

However, the blood running down his face from his scar was very prominent. From his bloodied and broken appearance, he looked like he had been injured in the explosion and not from the beating he just received.

The police and firefighters all showed up but so did some oddly dressed people. A very old man, named Albus Dumbledore, went up to Harry and tried to speak to him but he would not respond. Dumbledore was a very powerful wizard and he discreetly cast some diagnostic spells on Harry and discovered his broken bones, along with his cuts and bruises. The bleeding scar was of particular interest.

Acting quickly, he created a portkey, cast a Notice-Me-Not Charm, and sent Harry to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, of which he was Headmaster. It took Harry directly to the hospital wing and to the care of Madam Pomfrey, the school Healer.

Madam Pomfrey went to work right away healing the bones and the cuts. She was able to clean up the scar which had stopped bleeding on its own. It had also faded to just a thin white line in the shape of a lightning bolt. She put a paste on the bruises and gave a sleeping potion to Harry so he would rest. She had to use magic to get it down him. He was completely unresponsive to any conversation. He just stared straight ahead. Finally, the dreamless sleeping potion kicked in, Harry closed his eyes, and went to sleep.

Pomfrey and Dumbledore were extremely worried about him. There was no doubt all the destruction of the home was caused by very powerful magic. All three of Harry's relatives were dead. The obliviators from the Ministry were out in full force since so many Muggles saw the destruction, including the authorities. They all now believe it was a bad gas leak inside the house, never mind there was never any fire.

Both Dumbledore and Pomfrey understood that something like this would be very devastating to a boy Harry's age and he would likely be in shock but there was something about the look in his eyes that made them worry all the more, not to mention that a six-year-old had magic that powerful. What possibly could have set him off to use that much accidental magic?

They decided to try to keep him calm, and hopefully, they could get him to talk when he was awake again. If not, then Dumbledore decided he would do a quick peak in Harry's mind to see what was going on in that house to cause such a reaction.

When Harry finally woke up the next day, he felt a whole lot better. His arm and side no longer hurt and he felt very rested. However, he was not sure where he was. Suddenly an older lady in a white uniform came bustling out of an office door smiling at him.

"Mr. Potter, I'm so glad you're awake," she said to him as she approached his bedside. "My name is Madam Pomfrey and I'm a Healer. Let me make sure you're doing alright before we do anything else."

She waved her wand around and checked Harry over carefully while he just stared at her the whole time.

"Do you feel better?" she asked.

No response. Just staring. She continued on undeterred.

"You had a broken arm, three broken ribs, and lots of cuts and bruises but I was able to fix you right up. You appear to be doing much better. I know what you went through was a shock but do you think you could talk now and tell me what happened?"

Nothing.

Pomfrey cast a spell to check brain function but no information came back. She received no reading at all. She tried again and got the same response – nothing. It was like the spell could not do what it needed to do. Not even the strongest in Occlumency could block that spell. It didn't try to read your mind or see your thoughts. It was a medical spell used to check brain function and verify normalcy in how it was working. Strange, she thought, but she would have to come back to that later.

"Very well, if you need to use the loo it's right over there," she said pointing at the door.

Harry looked at her for a few more seconds then slowly got up and made his way to the bathroom to take care of his morning ablutions. When done he came back out and went over to the window to look out over the grounds. He looked so small standing there in the pajamas she provided him.

"Mr. Potter, here are some clothes we rounded up and resized for you. I will put them on your bed so you can change when you're ready. You can draw the curtain for privacy."

She laid the clothes down and went back into her office to contact Dumbledore via the floo and let him know their subject was awake and cognizant but still not conversing.

Dumbledore made his way back to the hospital wing while Harry drew the curtain closed and changed into the clothes provided. He finished getting dressed when he heard the old man again talking to Madam Pomfrey.

When they finished talking the old man came over to where he was.

"Hello Harry. I'm very glad that you're okay. You're looking much better. My name is Professor Dumbledore and you are at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. I'm the Headmaster here. Basically, that means I run things. I was the one that found you, if you remember, after the problem at your relative's house. I was hoping we could discuss what happened so we'll know how to help you better. Would that be okay?"

Harry just stared at him.

"Hmmm. Interesting. Why don't you come with me and I will show you more of this grand castle as we make our way to the Great Hall for some breakfast and then to my office where I will introduce you to one of the most marvelous birds you will ever see. His name is Fawkes and he's a phoenix, a magnificent creature who I dare say will be overjoyed to meet you. Shall we?"

Harry stared a couple more seconds then started walking to join Dumbledore as they walked out of the infirmary and down the hall. The professor pointed out all the knight armor and moving pictures as they went, mentioning different places of interest as they passed by them. Harry's expression never changed the whole way.

After a delicious breakfast where Harry ate more food than he had ever been allowed to eat before and Dumbledore repeatedly assured the boy he was safe now, they took a quiet ride up the moving spiral staircase and entered the Headmaster's office. It was full of books, pictures, trinkets, and many other interesting things but Harry still refused to show any expression. He just looked straight ahead.

"Fawkes, I would like to introduce you to my newest friend Harry Potter. Harry, this is Fawkes."

Harry was still staring straight ahead, not even acknowledging the Headmaster but when Fawkes trilled a greeting, Harry's head snapped around and he looked straight at the bird. Fawkes flew from his perch and landed on the desk directly in front of Harry. Harry's eyes followed him closely.

Fawkes walked up to the edge of the desk so he could be closer to Harry. He trilled again and Harry took a step closer so that their faces were only a few inches apart. Fawkes warbled some more talking to Harry and suddenly a big smile came over Harry's face.

Dumbledore could not believe it. Finally, a response from the young wizard. No words but a big smile. He owed Fawkes a big thank you for that. He decided to let Fawkes work and he would just watch for a while.

As Fawkes continued to trill and warble talking to Harry, Harry continued to smile and started petting the large bird. They seemed to have their own conversation.

When done Fawkes trilled a good-bye and flew back to his perch. Harry's eyes followed him all the way then turned back to Dumbledore who was sitting in his chair now. Harry's smile disappeared and he just stared, all expression on his face gone again.

"Looks like you have a new friend Harry. Fawkes is a great companion. He and I have been together for a very long time. Of course, I've been around for a very long time and phoenixes pretty much go on forever."

Harry still just stared at him.

Given his ability to follow instructions, Dumbledore could only assume he was able to understand. He just needed to get him to talk. But how?

"Harry, I hate to have to tell you this but your Uncle Vernon, Aunt Petunia, and cousin Dudley all died in the accident. Their house was completely destroyed so you will not be able to live there anymore. You can stay here for now. This is the school your parents attended and planned for you to attend when you reached the age of eleven. We teach magic and how to use it properly. What you did yesterday when the house blew up is what we call accidental magic. Do you understand?"

Nothing.

"So, remember that none of this was your fault. It was an accident. Accidents happen. They are out of our control. Do not feel responsible for their deaths, Harry. Trust me, it was not your fault. You're just a very powerful wizard Harry and your accidental magic is bigger than most. Not to worry though. We'll be happy to teach you how to control it so no more accidents happen."

Dumbledore looked at Harry closely for any change in his demeanor.

"He's…gone," said Harry slowly.

Caught by surprise, Dumbledore did a double take before responding.

"What's that Harry? Can you say that again?"

"He's gone."

"Yes, he is…wait a minute. Who's gone? Are you talking about your uncle or your cousin?"

"No."

"I don't understand. Who is the he you are referring to?"

"He's finally gone."

"Harry, can you please explain who you are talking about?"

Harry just stared at him again. What he could not explain was that after all these years of fighting that evil person inside him, he could no longer feel his presence. He no longer had to fight him constantly for dominance. Somehow, he got rid of that monster and his uncle, the other monster, just by using his magic. Perhaps he needed to learn how to use it better, he thought, just like his mummy suggested. It was certainly very useful. Unfortunately, Harry's mind had snapped. The strain was too great. It did it as a protection mechanism but he was now a bit lost.

Dumbledore decided that since Harry could not converse properly that he should use Legilimency on him so he could get the answers he needed and hopefully be able to help him better. Harry was already staring straight at his eyes so Dumbledore raised his wand and muttered Legilimency.

As soon as Dumbledore entered Harry's mind, he was thrown back about five feet backwards, his chair tipping over as he crashed into the bookshelf behind him. The professor laid there for a minute getting his bearings. He only got a glimpse of Harry's mind and it looked, for all intents and purposes, like a whirlwind. There was also a powerful force that threw him out, quite literally. He would not recommend trying that again.

He slowly stood back up, straightened his robes, and righted his chair. Harry was still there staring at him.

"Sorry about that Harry," Dumbledore apologized while rubbing his sore hip. "I didn't realize that would happen. Very good mind defenses you have there. I guess we will have to do this the hard way. Somehow I will have to convince you to talk so we can find out what exactly happened at your relative's house and what caused the explosion of accidental magic."

Still nothing.

"Harry, why don't you go talk to Fawkes for a minute while I call one of my colleagues. I need something from him that might help you."

While Harry walked over and spoke to Fawkes again, Dumbledore went to the fireplace and used the floo. He called his Potions Professor.

"Yes, Headmaster," came the reply.

"Severus, I need some Veritaserum. Do you have any available?"

"Yes, I just made a fresh batch yesterday," he drawled.

"Bring a small dose for a six-year-old child quickly."

"Six years old? Are you around the bin, Headmaster?"

"It's a special case, Severus," Albus said impatiently. "Please bring it quickly."

"Why not use Legilimency?"

"Because I tried and failed miserably."

"That's not possible. You said the child was only six years old."

"Yes, and I was flung back across the room when I tried. His mind, from the tiny glimpse I had, looked like a whirlwind. The force that pushed me out was extremely powerful."

"Who is this six-year-old?"

"Harry Potter. Now bring me that potion."

"I'm on my way."