Chapter 3

Waking up was always painful for the next 36 hours.
Not because the painkillers weren't working or Steve wasn't getting enough but because he was very confused.
Trying to find out where he was made him move his head way too fast and lifting it from the pillow at the same time wasn't helping at all.
The pain piercing his whole skull was excruciating.
His head fell back on the pillow and sent a different sort of pain into his brain.
Squeezing his eyes shut and letting out a groan was all he could do.
He tried to put his hand over his face as a reflex of comfort but his right arm was immobile in the sling and he couldn't lift it.
His brain was too foggy to get the idea of using his left arm.

It always took at least 10 minutes to get the pain back down to a manageable level.
Although Steve tried to breathe slowly and easily and manage the pain, he couldn't prevent the groaning and hissing escaping his lips.

Danny felt for his friend but there was nothing he could do except showing his support.
Talking was increasing the headache, so Danny "just" took Steve's hand to make him know that he wasn't alone.
Steve always curled his fingers around Danny's. It sure comforted him and although Danny was always in fear that his partner would crush his fingers, he didn't stop doing it.

"That's good," Danny said almost in a whisper when he felt Steve's hand lowering the pressure in his hand.
"You are doing great. Relax. It is almost over."
Then he started to stroke Steve's good arm to give some more comfort.

Steve, who's whole body had been in an almost cramp-like condition for the past minutes relaxed more and more.
Danny didn't stop speaking soothing words in a soft and calm voice.
When he felt that Steve's muscles had loosened, he put his stroking hand on Steve's good shoulder and squeezed slightly.
"You did it. You are good now. I'm here and you are still in the hospital. No need to attack anyone. Everything will be fine…." Danny went on and on.

Steve was able to concentrate on other things than the pain again.

He had felt someone by his side, he had heard a voice, he had felt a soft touch but he hadn't been able to determine who it was, not even if it was male or female.
He hadn't cared either.
The person hadn't seemed someone who wanted to hurt him – and even if, he wouldn't have been able to defend himself anyway. It had felt like the pain would kill him anyway, no assistance needed.

Now, that the pain was just a dull ache in the back, he recognized the voice.
'Danny,' he thought. 'Who else would be here? I should have known.'
He wanted to open his eyes wanted to show his best friend that he was good now but the soft voice and the comforting strokes felt so good, he just wanted them both to continue.

After a while the stroking stopped. Instead, Steve felt a squeeze on his shoulder.
The soft voice continued to talk to him, and suddenly Steve could make sense of them.
They weren't just words anymore like before. He listened to them for another few minutes and took the comfort they were supposed to bring out of them.
Then he could hear the worried undertone in them too.

He didn't want Danny to worry, he had enough on his plate already.
Steve opened his eyes but had to blink a few times to at least see more clearly.
It wasn't double vision and he could recognize Danny for sure but everything still looked a little blurred like he was watching him through water or a dirty window.
"Hey," he said with a raspy voice. "'m good. Thank you." He tried to smile.
Danny smiled back.
"That is great. You did good. Much faster than yesterday.
You want to drink something or are you still nauseous?"
"No. 'm good. Water sounds perfect."
Steve took a few small sips through a straw before taking a big one.
"I am sorry Danny. I really don't want to worry you but…it…it is really hard after waking up.
When I am trying to fall asleep, I am telling myself to remember where I am when I wake up. But obviously it doesn't work. It…it is almost like a panic attack.

"I've been taught to keep quiet and try to hear or smell things to try to find out where I am before I draw attention to myself. But…but when I wake up all of that is forgotten. I feel…like I am in danger, like I have to react now – or never…Maybe I shouldn't sleep."
"Oh no. You have to sleep. The doctor said it is good for you – helps the brain to recover.
And your brain already needed a lot of that before the fight."
Danny smiled at his friend. "I will help you to come back to reality as often as you need it."
"I know Danny. I know. But that doesn't make it any better for either of us."

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