Hey everybody, y'all all right? I know, I know, it's been a "month of Sundays" since I've updated this story, but work has been kicking my butt. It's been hard finding time to write, and to come up with something to write, but I managed. This is for everybody who sent PMs checking in and asking about an update. Here it is.
As always, thank you so much for taking the time to read AWS. This is a long chapter, but it has been a while. Leave reviews and let me know what you think.
Happy reading.
TBOT
Later…
After putting their children down for their much needed naps, Fitz took Olivia's hand and led her to their bedroom. When they entered the large, elegantly decorated space, he pulled up the video feed of Cruz's bedroom, and the nursery, on his tablet, and set it on his night table. Reaching out to his wife again, he pulled her into his arms, leaned down and kissed her on the lips.
"Since the kids are asleep, how about mom and dad having a little fun?" He raised his eyebrows and grinned down into her beautiful face.
Olivia chuckled softly. "I know all about your idea of fun, mister." She playfully tapped the center of his hard chest and tried to move away from him attempting to put some space between them, but as usual, it didn't work.
Fitz laughed, pulling her back into his arms. "Okay, after this fun, we'll have a little fun with our clothes on." He began unbuttoning her blouse slowly, allowing his hands to feel every inch of exposed skin, while leaning down to kiss her lips. Olivia melted against him, moaning into his mouth. Knowing they didn't have long, he pushed her blouse away from her body, exposing her dark purple lace bra.
"Damn!" he whispered.
Olivia smiled coyly. "Are you okay, babe?"
"Oh I'm better than okay," he said as he reached out and unsnapped her bra, freeing her breasts, full and round. He bent and took a nipple in his mouth and she gasped in pleasure. He laved first one then the other with his tongue until they were both aroused. Finally lifting his head, he reached down and unbuttoned her jeans and helped her out of them, leaving her in a matching dark purple thong. His eyes never left hers as he slipped his fingers beneath the elastic of her thong and sank them deep into her core. She moaned and he buried his face in the crease of her neck and gently kissed her shoulder.
Olivia moved away from her husband, turned and wiggled her bare butt cheeks at him. The effect was so sexy that Fitz almost came in his pants. She bent slightly, removed her thong, flung it over her head, and then climbed naked onto their bed. She slowly crawled to the top toward the mound of pillows, knowing he was watching. By the time she turned over to face him, he'd stripped completely and stood with his hands on his hips.
"Wow!" She stared at his large erection. "Is that for me?" she asked, wrapping a lock of hair around her finger and licking her top lip.
"Only for you, Livvie," he said with that grin. He climbed onto the big bed and moved up toward his wife, resting between her open legs. Wasting no time, he started fingering her core slowly again with his fingers, teasing and tormenting her. Olivia moaned with pleasure, closing her legs tight around his hand, as she rolled her hips sensuously.
"You feel so good, Livvie," Fitz whispered. Do you like it?"
"Yessss," she hissed, nodding her head. "You know I do."
"You got wet so fast."
"I was wet when you started unbuttoning my blouse," she whispered.
Fitz laughed and moved his mouth to her breasts while his fingers worked her clit. She gasped and arched off the bed as he sucked hard on her nipple. She finally let go and let the sensations take over her body as Fitz worked his magic. He wanted to go slow but knew they were on borrowed time. And besides, when had his dick ever listened to him when it came to his wife? He wanted to spend more time on her breasts, but Olivia was begging for his hard inches.
"Please, Fitz," she moaned. Her body moved under his.
"Deeper?" He asked.
"Yes, please. Deeper, babe."
Fitz gripped her legs, pushed them open wider and settled between her inner thighs. Taking his hard inches into his hand, he teased the tip along her wet folds with his tip.
"Fitz! Please!" she said urgently.
He moved closer and plunged deep inside his wife, making her gasp.
Olivia threw her head back and tilted her hips, taking more of him inside her. "Oh my God! Fitz! Please don't stop."
Fitz smiled down at her, giving her all she wanted and more as he pounded into her, their bodies slapping together. He watched her eyes start to close.
"Open your eyes, Livvie," Fitz whispered as he continued to give her long, slow, deep strokes.
Olivia opened her eyes as he picked up his pace. He leaned down and kissed her lips softly.
"I love you, Livvie."
"Me too, babe," she said softly as she combed her fingers through his curls and to his nape, and pulled him closer to her, pressing her tender breasts against his chest. She kissed his temple and rocked her hips in a steady rhythm, meeting his thrusts.
Fitz slowly pulled out of his wife and eased back inside her again, before lowering his head and placing kisses all over her face. She wrapped her legs around her husband's back, forcing him deeper inside her, begging him over and over again not to stop.
"Livvie," he groaned. "Come with me, baby."
His words undid her and after one more stroke, and another, she came apart. Shuddering, and clinging to him, her mouth opened in a soundless scream as her body tightened around him.
Fitz felt the familiar butterflies in his stomach, his arms stiffened and his head tilted back. His jaw clenched, and he groaned hard, shuddering as he came inside her. Lowering his head between her neck and shoulder to muffle his yell as his climax ripped through him. Still shivering, he squeezed her to him.
They both lay panting, their bodies slick with sweat when finally, he lifted his head and gazed into her beautiful doe eyes; eyes that she'd passed on to their children. "Do you know how beautiful you are right now? You look so relaxed, and your skin is glowing."
Olivia smiled and reached out to move that curl away from his forehead, before caressing one side of his handsome face. She watched as his eyes close and leaned up to kiss his chin.
"Thank you, baby, I feel beautiful."
She wrapped her arms around his back and held him tightly, loving the weight of his body against her. As always, Olivia wished they could stay this way forever. He was still deep inside her as she rubbed his back, and he sighed.
"I'm too heavy for you," he said before finally, breaking their intimate connection. He rolled onto his side, pulling her into his arms. Reaching out, he brushed her hair away from her beautiful face. Her only response was to kiss his chest and hug him tighter. No words were necessary. Oh how she loved this man. The past three years had been the best of her life. She knew she had the best husband a woman could ask for, and she loved her life with him. So much had changed but their lives couldn't have been happier, and she was looking for many, many more.
Fitz sighed. They were in such a good place. They were extremely happy, and their relationship was healthy. Of course like everybody else, they had their moments in their relationship, and disagreed from time to time, but they never lost their mutual respect for one another. It had taken time, patience, a lot of compromise, communicating, (effectively), listening and understanding, to get here. Marriage was hard by itself, with all of the changes and adjustments, and they hadn't really had a chance to be together as just a married couple before they became parents. It had been a smooth transition in the beginning but almost two months after Cruz was born, Fitz learned that all was not well with his wife.
XXX
Three years ago…
Fitz deactivated the alarm as he walked into his quiet home. For a moment, he stood silently. This was home, the one place in his life that held everything important to him. This was where love existed. Locking the door securely behind him, he reset the alarm and made his way to the kitchen for a bottle of water. He'd gone out to Woody's with a few of his teammates after practice. They'd sat in the VIP section talking about their upcoming game on Sunday. He'd left at nine-thirty, eager to get home to his wife and son. He drank the water down in big gulps, dropped the bottle into the recycling bin, headed to the stairs and up to the love of his life.
XXX
Olivia had just drifted off to sleep when she heard the alarm, alerting her that her husband was home. She glanced at the clock, it was almost ten. He'd called earlier to check on her and Cruz, and to let her know that he would be home soon. She looked at her sleeping son who lay on his back with a pacifier in his tiny mouth. Your daddy's home.
Olivia felt Fitz's presence as soon as he walked into their bedroom. She listened intently as he quietly walked farther inside the dimly lit room, with the television playing softly in the background.
Although Olivia's back was to him, Fitz knew his wife wasn't asleep when he entered the room.
She knew his routine, and waited. He walked to her side of the bed to see his son. He always checked on the baby and then his wife. She looked at him; he looked exhausted. He smiled at her before reaching out to touch his son's cheek, but Olivia angrily pushed his hand away.
"Don't touch him," Olivia whispered between clenched teeth.
Fitz looked at his wife as if she'd grown another head. "What?!"
"Please don't touch him, Fitz," she said in exasperation.
He was genuinely confused by her uncharacteristic outburst. "Livvie what's wrong?" he asked, watching her eyes fill with tears.
Instead of answering, she tossed the covers back and stood from the bed. She walked toward the sitting area of their bedroom with Fitz hot on her heels, and took a seat on the sofa. Tucking her feet under her, she reached for a tissue to wipe her eyes and blow her nose. Fitz sat on the ottoman directly in front of her waiting for her to tell him what was going on. His wife was upset and he needed to know why.
After a full minute, she sighed and finally answered his question.
"Fitz, Cruz has been fussy all day. He had two diaper explosions, sprayed me once, spit up on my face, cried for the breast and then rejected it. No matter what I did he just cried. Bert tried to help, but he just wanted me. And he only napped in ten-fifteen minutes intervals. Bert finally left at six so it's been him and me since then. He nursed and finally fell asleep almost an hour ago. I'm exhausted, and you weren't here," she said glaring at him.
Fitz knew she was tired so he didn't take her words personally. He reached for her hand and squeezed. "Livvie, why didn't you call me earlier today? When I called before we went to Woody's, you said everything was fine. And when I called again from the bar, you didn't say anything." He kissed her fingers. "You know if I had known you were having a rough day with Cruz, I would've canceled everything and come home to you as soon as possible."
She shook her head. "No. You're the team captain. You needed to spend some off the field time with the guys."
"But if you'd said you needed me to come home, I would have. You know that." He took both her hands in his and looked directly into her eyes. "Livvie, Cruz has had many fussy days and nights before, and we've gotten through them. But you've never responded this way. What's really going on? Talk to me."
Olivia stared at her husband. He was right, she hadn't, which is why she knew he wasn't going to let this go. She looked away for a brief moment and then back at him again. Sighing deeply, she began. "Fitz you know my career is everything to me, and I never thought I'd have to put it on hold. When I left the AUSA's office my intention was to devote myself to my new career, and to our relationship. But then, surprise, I got pregnant, and things changed."
Fitz smiled softly at his wife, and she returned it.
"Being a new mom is exciting and wonderful, but at the same time, it's incredibly hard and isolating. It's also a lot of work and can be completely overwhelming, like today. Don't get me wrong, I love that little boy so much." She quickly glanced in the direction of their sleeping son. "He is a joy and the best thing that has ever happened to me."
"But?" He said, urging her to continue.
She took a deep breath. "But Fitz I am absolutely miserable most of the time, and I am at a complete loss about how to fix it. I mean, you were right, it's great to not miss all those little day-to-day moments, but this is harder than I thought possible. I'm so lonely, and frustrated, and it's making me resent my time with Cruz when all I want to do is soak up every moment that I have with him."
Fitz sat up straighter, but didn't respond.
"This transition has been harder than I thought it would be. And it's not just emotional, but physical too."
Their son chose that moment to let them know he was awake. Their boy had a strong set of lungs. Fitz stood quickly and went to check on him.
"He shouldn't be hungry," Olivia said to her husband's retreating back.
After a few minutes, Fitz returned with a sleeping Cruz on his broad shoulder. Olivia smiled. He sat next to her on the sofa and she leaned over and kissed her baby's soft cheek.
"He just needed a dry diaper," Fitz said kissing his son's forehead.
Olivia's heart got the same tugging feeling it always did whenever she saw the two of them together. He was so attentive to her and their little boy. She watched them, entranced, as Fitz gently rubbed Cruz's back. He was always so gentle and loving. Her husband was a damn good father. He tried to be home by six every evening. And when he did, he didn't just come and watch film, he pulled his own weight. He was fully hands-on with their son, and she couldn't imagine doing any of this without him by her side. As much as she loved him, it still didn't stop her from feeling a little animosity toward him.
She'd started feeling some resentment toward the fact that her husband could continue living his life pretty much as he did before they had their son. While he was in Ashburn with his teammates, she was home being spit up on, pooped on, peed on, nursing and changing diapers. She felt like a shadow of her former self. Her world now revolved around someone else's needs, day in and day out. Yes, she'd agreed that she would stay home and care for their baby, and while she was happy to do that, she also resented her husband's freedom. But whenever she tried to think of what more he could do to support her, she couldn't think of anything because Fitz was so good at responding when she asked for help.
She had yet to attend a home game or a Wives Club meeting because the thought of leaving her baby gave her anxiety. She did venture out once to meet Jada and India for lunch. They'd made it through an entire hour before Cruz began screaming, and she was a leaking mess. Thank God for Jada Cruz. She'd quickly packed up India, and the rest of Olivia's things while the new mother hurried to her car to nurse her demanding son. The incident had left her so traumatized, that whenever she thought about leaving home again, alone with her son, she panicked. This only isolated her more.
Joey and Jada encouraged her to talk to talk to her husband. Jada was also a first time mother and understood that loss of independence was a big adjustment for new moms. And that what she was feeling was normal. She knew she was blessed beyond measure to be able to stay home with their son for as long as she wanted. She had help, didn't have to worry about finances, and she felt like a jerk for being ungrateful.
One morning during Olivia's workout and after Joey had watched her bestie wallow in denial for far too long, she'd heard enough and did what best friends are supposed to do: she asked Olivia what she needed, what she wanted to do for herself.
Olivia replied, as she always did: "I'm fine, Jo. Cruz is still a baby and I just want to focus on him." But in her heart, she knew she needed more. And that's exactly why she'd been feeling so resentful toward her husband. He had both a fulfilling job and a life outside of their home. She on the other hand currently had nothing outside her identity as a mother.
"Finish what you were saying, Livvie."
"Fitz I never expected to get pregnant and then stay home with a newborn. I've lost so many social interactions that I, honestly, took for granted. Although Bert's here every day, and your mother is in and out, that's not enough."
Her eyes filled with tears again and his heart broke at the sight. How had he missed this? Sure, he had gotten his way, but his wife had compromised and sacrificed the most. Her life had changed in a dramatic way and what had he compromised on? What sacrifices had he made? What had he done to prevent her from feeling this way?
"And then you come home each evening and take the baby so I can have some time to do something for myself before I have to sit down and nurse again. When you tell me about your day, I feel some resentment toward you."
She felt his body tense but continued.
"I'm angry that you're able to do all the things that I can't. You get to leave and can go to practice, be around other people and do what you love. You can attend Team events and make personal appearances without stressing about when our son will physically need you. I know part of this is just me accepting my new reality as a mom, but I'm feeling myself drifting further and further away from feeling like I'll ever have the opportunity to start my career again. I just need more."
Fitz reached out and placed his free arm around his wife's shoulders, thinking about what to say. Finally, he spoke.
"A lot has changed since we brought this little guy home." He leaned down and kissed his son's forehead again, while Olivia played with his tiny hand. "I need you to communicate your needs, and your challenges to me so I can better support you. Now, tell me what you need."
Olivia looked at her husband, and into his beautiful eyes filled with concern for her; she also saw tenderness and the depth of sincerity and love he had for her.
"We agreed that if this arrangement wasn't working, we'd revisit the situation and figure something else out." She looked at him. "The arrangement isn't working. I need to work."
Fitz nodded. He wasn't surprised. No way was she his Type A wife going to make it four months at home with their baby, not working. What did surprise him was that it had taken her this long to admit that she was unhappy. He knew his wife.
"But you agreed, Livvie. We said four, five months tops."
Olivia nodded. "I agreed because it's what you wanted," she admitted. "And I wanted to make you happy."
"But then you resented me for it," he replied. "We're a team. You have to be honest and tell me the truth, tell me how you're feeling."
"I know, but I wanted to try, Fitz. Every time you leave home, for whatever reason, it makes me angry. Then I feel horrible and selfish because at least I'm able to stay home with our son."
Fitz expelled a breath. He leaned down and kissed her curls. "Livvie, when I asked you to take a step back from your career to stay home with our son, you did it reluctantly because it was what I wanted. I know you never expected to be a stay-at-home mom but you wanted to support what I wanted. We both know this isn't you and I'm sorry for even asking. You love what you do and you need to work. Your ambition and tenacity are what I love about you. It's so damn sexy." He grinned at her and she laughed.
"Fitz, there was a moment after I gave birth where I didn't want a nanny nor did I want to work. I wanted nothing more than to stay home with my baby. Of course that was probably the hormonal rush of feel-good oxytocin thinking for me. But I thought that was what I wanted."
Fitz chuckled softly.
"But what I've learned in almost two months is I'm not cut out to do only this." She glanced at him. "Am I being selfish because I want to work when I'm privileged to be able to stay home with my son, and when there are so many women who would love to be in my position?"
"No Livvie, you are not selfish. You have a career that you love, just like I do. You're also bored and beginning to lose your sense of self. I want you to be happy. I can't ask you to dim your light to please me. I also don't want you to resent me because you feel as if you can't put yourself first. If you can't do what you love, outside of being a wife and a mother, you're not going to be any good to me or our son. So, what have you been thinking about doing?"
She looked at him, surprised by his question.
"What?" He lifted a brow. "I know you, pretty lady. You already have ideas in that beautiful head of yours, don't you? I can see them floating around in there." He gave her that lopsided grin and she laughed, feeling as if a heavy weight had been lifted from her shoulders.
Olivia reached out and rubbed her son's back before she answered Fitz's question. "Josie called last week."
That got his attention. Josie Doyle was the agent that had signed Olivia after she decided on a career change and left the AUSA's office. They'd been fielding a few offers and new opportunities, but everything was put on hold once Olivia announced she was pregnant and would be staying home with the baby. He was surprised that she hadn't told him Josie called a week ago.
"Oh? What did you two discuss?"
"MSNBC is interested in adding me as an on-air Contributor and Legal Analyst. They want me to provide legal commentary on their daytime shows. I would be discussing issues on criminal justice, and race."
"Wow!"
Olivia nodded. "Yeah, wow. We'd discussed the opportunity along with a few others, but when I got pregnant it was all placed on the back burner."
"And now?"
"The network is still interested. I would be able to tape from home, which is why I'm even considering it. That is important. However, there may be a few times where I have to go into the city to tape my segment live with a panel and a host, or tape a segment for the primetime shows as well."
"And what did you tell her?"
"I told her that I would need to discuss it with you. I mean, Bert's here during the day, which won't be a problem. But primetime may be a challenge. Josie's forwarding me the contract tomorrow so I can look over it."
"Well Livvie, this is a great opportunity. You can't pass on this one. We'll figure it out."
Olivia gave him a huge smile. She wanted to hug and jump all over him, but Cruz was still asleep in his arms, so she kissed his cheek and squeezed his hand. "Fitz, babe, are you sure?"
"Yes, I'm sure."
"I don't know what to say. I had let go of the idea of doing anything else because I wanted to put our family first." She looked at him again, "So you're really okay with this?"
"It will make you happy," he said simply. "I will always support whatever you want to do, whatever puts that beautiful smile back on your face."
And he did want her to be happy. His wife was drowning; she'd made all the sacrifices. Maybe he wasn't supportive enough in making sure she was happy. That would change. She needed to get back to what she loved, what she did best. Marriage was about compromise, and the compromise here was she would be working from home.
"Babe, I can't always be the wife you want me to be, and I won't even try, because I can only be me. But you are a good husband and father, better than I could've ever imagined, and I promise I'll be a better wife."
"Livvie you are a good wife, and an excellent mother. Just because you want to do more than sit at home all day doesn't change that, nor does it change the way I feel about you. My day still begins and ends with you. I have this life because of you. I love you and this little boy more than I love my own life."
Her eyes never left his, and Fitz reached out to wipe a tear she didn't know had fallen. "I love you too, baby."
He smiled in response to her words and leaned down to gently kiss her lips. "Livvie, we can't let issues go unresolved and build up over time. Okay? It's not good for either of us personally, or for our marriage. We have to do all we can to keep our relationship healthy. You have to talk to me. We have to communicate better."
She nodded. "I will."
"And so will I." He released a breath. "I still should've noticed that you weren't happy."
"I should've said something instead of assuming that you would notice.
"I'm still sorry I didn't. Forgive me?"
She nodded. "Of course." Then leaned over and kissed his cheek.
"Good. Now, I need to shower," he said.
Olivia reached out and ran a gentle hand over the back of her son's soft little head before Fitz stood from the sofa. She didn't move, and watched as her husband walked away with their son to lay him in the attached crib.
Fitz kissed Cruz's forehead and stood watching him, before walking back to the sitting area, and his wife.
Olivia watched as he removed his shirt. She hadn't really seen his chest in weeks. He had been working out extra hard, and she swore he now had an eight-pack. She longed to touch his naked chest. It had been almost two months. Two long months.
His nearness, his presence, his scent were such aphrodisiacs that she was wet whenever she simply thought about him, and wetter when he was near. They still hadn't had sex and Fitz had been such a gentleman and hadn't tried to initiate anything. But he never missed an opportunity to tell her how sexy she was, and watching her mother their son was one of the hottest things he'd ever witnessed. He had told her that he expected nothing from her, and had tried in many other ways to let her know that he loved her and still found her desirable. She loved him even more for that.
He gave her that hungry gaze as he pulled down his pants and boxer briefs in one quick swoop and stepped out of them. Olivia looked at him appreciatively. God he was so damn fine, with his muscled chest and arms. The muscles in his legs flexed as he moved, and his inches swung back and forth across the tops of thighs. Walking over to her he leaned down and kissed her again before continuing to their bathroom, while Olivia sat pretending to be unaffected by his naked body. Not long after, she heard the shower.
"Damn!" she whispered to herself before finally standing and going to their bedroom to join their son.
XXX
Fitz felt his wife's arms slide around his waist and her small body press against his back. His eyes were closed as he allowed the water to cascade down his body. She peppered his back with kisses.
"Thank you again, babe." She felt so much love and overwhelming gratitude for him. "I love you."
"You don't have to thank me, Livvie." He leaned back to kiss her lips and that's when he noticed that she was still dressed in her pajamas.
"Mind if I join you?" she grinned up at him, as she ran her small hands up and down his chest and then moved around his large body to stand in front of him. Placing her hands on his bare chest, she began kissing the base of his throat, down his chest over his flat nipples and finally over his heart.
For almost two months, Fitz had kept his hands to himself. Being near Olivia kept a part of his body hard, often, and touching her would only make him lose control. A simple kiss would lead to him wanting more which is why he hadn't dared to make a single move.
"Livvie…"
"Yes, baby," she replied in a hushed tone while reaching down to grip his hard, thick inches and began making slow, deliberate strokes.
"I…I don't think…damn," he hissed.
Olivia watched as he flexed his arm muscles. He was using every bit of his restraint to maintain control of himself. She finally released him and he gazed down at her. His eyes were cobalt blue, hooded and filled with a passion that matched her own.
"How are you feeling?" he asked in a husky voice.
Olivia could see that her husband was still fighting for control and tonight was finally the night she needed him to lose it.
She placed her palms on his chest and slowly slid them up until they were around his neck and her body pressed against his.
"I feel fine, babe. But I'll be a whole lot better once you're inside me." She moved her hips seductively, grinding against the part of him that she desperately wanted, as if they were making love, and his brows shot up.
"Are you sure, Livvie?" he asked needing to know that she was really ready for this to happen.
"Yes, baby, I'm sure."
Fitz stared at his beautiful wife as she stepped back and unbuttoned her wet pajama top. She then peeled it from her body, and tossed it to the shower floor. Her breasts were so full and she was at least a cup size bigger now. Over the past two months, he had tried hard not to stare like a starving man when she fed their son and right now her breasts were begging for his attention as they sat at attention in her nursing bra. They were swollen with milk and her nipples were probably sore as usual, so he knew to avoid that area altogether.
Olivia's body had changed. She'd been consistently working out with Joey and it showed in her slim waist and toned butt. He knew she wasn't pleased with the results…yet, but all he saw was perfection. She still lamented about the 'baby fat' but he was still trying to find it.
Olivia unsnapped her bra and removed it, dropping it next to the pajama top. She followed Fitz's line of vision and frowned. She tried to wrap her arms around her waist, but he stopped her and pulled her into his arms.
"Don't hide your body from me, Livvie. You are gorgeous, the most beautiful woman I've ever seen." He leaned down and kissed her as his hands roamed her curves. Finally coming up for air, he hooked his fingers into her soaked pajama pants and pushed them down her thighs and finally her legs. Going down on his knees, he was face to face with her core as he lifted her feet out of the pants one by one and she kicked them aside. He smiled up at her, she wasn't wearing panties. He then licked his lips in anticipation of getting reacquainted with her taste and scent. Reaching out, he lifted her leg over his shoulder and smiled up at her again. Finally, he buried his face between her thighs and his stubble tickled her inner thighs as his tongue circled her clit and her back arched.
Olivia screamed, "Oh, shit" as his tongue was joined by first one finger, and then a second. It was a damn shame that his mouth and fingers could cause so much pleasure. Fitz tongued and fingered her hard, and the pressure was persistent and intense. Olivia grabbed his head in a vise grip to keep from sliding to floor as the building sexual tension in her body became unbearable.
Her swearing only encouraged him.
"Fitz, please."
"You're so ready for me, aren't you, baby?"
"Yes," she moaned as she continued to hold onto his head
Lapping at her with his tongue, he kept moving his fingers in and out of her until he had her writhing against his mouth, moaning, gasping and whimpering, sounds that turned him on and excited him. She tensed, gripping his wet hair.
"I know you love my mouth and my fingers but I promise what's coming next, will have you screaming louder."
Olivia threw her head back, the shower soaking her curls as Fitz continued to relentlessly pleasure her with his tongue and fingers. "Oh…Fitz…I can't…I can't take much more…please…fuck me."
He grinned. "With my fingers? My tongue? Or my dick?"
"Oh, God!"
He stopped abruptly and looked up at her, concern on his face. "Did I hurt you?"
She shook her head vigorously, spraying water. "No. It's just…good. Sooo good, babe."
He grinned at her. "You're delicious, Livvie."
Olivia's only response was to breathe faster, nearing the brink of euphoria. "Fitz! Oh. My!" He continued to lick her right through her climax. She tensed, gripping his wet hair tighter as she became caught up in the throes of her orgasm. She cried out his name and stiffened as Fitz watched.
With a groan, Fitz stood and lifted her in his arms. Shutting off the water, he left the shower and walked with her to the bathroom vanity, water dripping from their bodies all over the floor. Sitting her atop the marble counter, he stood between her legs and leaned his forehead against hers, closing his eyes. God he loved this woman.
"That was amazing," she whispered, her core still pulsating.
"Are you sure you're ready, Livvie?" He needed to know.
Olivia nodded. "After what you just did to me in the shower, I'm lucky I even know my name."
Fitz laughed.
"I'm serious babe, I know what I want and I want you. Now!"
He stared down at her, she was so beautiful. "I probably won't be worth a damn at practice tomorrow if we make love right now, but I don't care."
Olivia chuckled and then watched as he reached into a drawer and removed a tube of water-based moisturizing herbal lube, and a condom. She raised a brow and he smiled.
"Dr. Goodrich suggested it, remember? Along with using a condom since you're not on any birth control."
She did remember. Fitz had gone with her to her six week postpartum appointment and had obviously listened intently as Dr. Goodrich explained that due to her tear, things might be a little tighter "down there," and had probably shifted around. Her husband was prepared.
Picking up the condom, he handed to her. "Put it on me," he said. Olivia nodded and without losing eye contact, she put the packet up to her mouth and ripped it open with her teeth. She finally had to look down so she could see what she was doing. She pinched the tip, eased the condom over her husband's hard length and smoothed it in place.
Fitz took over from there. He wet his fingers with lube, then parting her lower lips, gently slicked them with his fingertips. He stroked himself with the excess and finally angled his large tip to her core.
"I'll take it easy, okay?" he said as he looked into her eyes.
Olivia nodded silently.
Slowly his large head entered her and her fingers gripped his shoulders, and the rest of her body tensed. She closed her eyes briefly against the slight pain she felt as Fitz entered her. Then she gradually relaxed as he eased past a point of resistance.
"Do you want me to stop, Livvie?" his voice was filled with desire, and concern.
Olivia shook her head. "No."
"You can change your mind," he said.
She shook her head again. "Just go slow." Despite her fear, it had been a long time, and she knew Fitz was ready. It was in the way he looked at her. Her body had had plenty of time to heal, and she wouldn't stop now.
Slowly, as he continued to push further into her, she took several deep breaths and her muscles grasped his dick. She moaned at the discomfort from being so tight, and from her husband being so long and thick. He kept his eyes on her the entire time. He didn't push all the way in, but worked the tip in and out of her slowly. She was so wet, and the lube made the pressure of his entry a little easier. He remained still, focused on his wife, waiting for her to adjust to having him inside her again.
"Are you okay?" Fitz asked.
Olivia nodded. "Yes."
He gently stroked her back until he felt the tension ease away from her body. He needed to make sure she wasn't in any pain before he began moving deeper and slowly inside her again.
"You feel good, babe," Olivia assured him, smiling.
As much as she knew he wanted to take her fast and hard, he moved slow and gentle. He didn't want to rush. He reached for her hands and locked their fingers together and continued to move in and out of her slowly. Her mouth fell open in a silent moan. It had been so long and he was so hard, and despite the initial discomfort, it felt vaguely nice, and surprisingly good.
"Livvie," he growled and shifted his hips. He established a slow pace. "So good, so tight, Livvie. I've waited so long to feel you again."
"Fitz, please," she whispered.
"Livvie. My wife. My beautiful wife," he rasped.
Olivia grabbed her husband's tight ass trying to pull him closer and deeper, wanting all of him. But Fitz resisted, knowing he had to take it slow. He kissed her neck and then moved to her mouth. He took her breath away as he moved a little faster, his tongue matching the moves of his dick. Olivia wrapped her legs tightly around Fitz's back panting against him, and he lowered his head, taking her lips in a deep kiss. He groaned long and deep into her mouth, and she tore her mouth away, throwing back her head and arching her body against his.
Fitz growled and pulled her closer to his big body again, then lifted her hips, moving a little faster. He was determined to fuck almost two months of pent-up sexual frustration into her. All sweet and gentle lovemaking was forgotten. Fitz started to rock her world with harder strokes. The longer, harder and deeper he stroked her, the wetter she became and her orgasm was within reach.
Leaning down, he whispered near ear. "You are so damn sexy, Mrs. Grant. I missed making love to you so much. Did you miss me too?"
"Yes," she moaned, getting wetter. "I missed you. I missed us."
"Please promise me that you'll talk to me," he said between breaths. "Don't hesitate to let me know how you're feeling. I need to know. Okay?" He was out of breath as he continued to stroke into her.
Olivia nodded. "O…Okay," she said, breathless too, before her orgasm hit. He reached between them and thumbed her clit as he fucked her.
"Fitz!" She screamed, and he smiled.
He felt her walls tighten and squeeze around him as her body brought him closer to climax. "Come, baby," he whispered near her ear. "I want to hear you come."
And she did, shaking and quivering from waves of pleasure.
Olivia's moans and her screaming out his name sent Fitz over the edge. He kissed her hard, cutting off her screams as his body jerked and shuddered, and he emptied himself into the condom. He collapsed against his wife, still hard and throbbing inside of her.
Olivia looked into Fitz's face, and smiled as their chests heaved together. She was so happy knowing that she was going to have a lifetime of this with this man that she loved with her entire heart. His eyes were closed and he wore a small smile. She kissed his chin and he slowly opened an eye, and his face spread into that lopsided grin.
"How are you feeling, baby?" He needed to know that he hadn't hurt her, much.
Olivia smiled. "I'm fine, Fitz."
"Are you sore at all?"
She shook her head, "No, Fitz. I really am fine."
"Good. I didn't want to hurt you."
Olivia reached out and stroked his chin. "You didn't."
"Yes I did, at first."
"But you didn't in the end," she replied. "The odd thing is, after the pain subsided, I may have had one of the best orgasms ever."
Fitz grinned. "Oh yeah?"
"Absolutely."
"Well I aim to please."
She pushed at his hard chest and rolled her eyes, before finally sliding her arms around his waist and burying her face in his neck. "I love you, Fitzgerald Grant."
"And I love you, Olivia Grant."
She laughed. "That's Olivia Pope-Grant, mister."
He grinned at her. "Livvie, I told you before that I didn't care what name you used. You're mine."
Olivia ran a hand through his damp curls. "That I am. Now help me down so I can check on my baby."
Fitz glanced at their son on the monitor that she'd set on the vanity, before joining him in the shower. Cruz was still asleep but they both knew he'd be awake soon, hungry and ready to eat.
"I'm surprised you didn't wake him with all the noise you were making."
"I wasn't the only one, Fitzgerald."
Fitz laughed and pressed a lingering kiss to her lips then grabbed the full condom before he eased out of her. He lifted her into his arms and held her tight against his chest. "We were both loud."
Olivia smiled, "Yes we were."
"That's how I could tell that you were enjoying yourself."
She nodded. "Oh I definitely was."
"Good." He kissed her again, cupping her ass. "Now go check on our son while I run us a hot bath with lavender and eucalyptus."
She kissed his lips and reached for her robe. He helped her into the silk garment and tied it for her.
"I'll be right back."
She turned to walk away and Fitz swatted her softly on her ass causing her to laugh loudly. He watched her until she disappeared into their bedroom and reappeared on the monitor, standing over their son's crib. They were going to be okay, he thought, as long as they were willing to communicate and change. Small setbacks were normal in any marriage, they were expected, but how they dealt with them depended on their mindset. He was just grateful they were able to resolve Olivia's issue. But then, he was willing to do anything to make her happy and he knew she felt the same way. They both wanted to do whatever they needed to make sure their love and marriage survived.
Finally, he went to discard the condom before going about the task of preparing their bath.
XXX
The following Sunday, the week before the Team's bye week, Olivia finally attended her first game. She hadn't wanted to leave her baby before, and Fitz understood and didn't pressure her. He knew he had her full support no matter where she watched him play. This was the last game before the Christmas holidays began, and then the new year, and the playoffs.
Maya and Eli Pope were only too happy to come to Great Falls to care for their grandson. Olivia was reluctant to leave her baby boy, and left them a list of dos and don'ts for which her mother took offense, and scoffed at her daughter.
"I did raise two children, Olivia Carolyn, so I believe that qualifies me to look after my grandbaby." She kissed a cooing Cruz who was in her arms.
Eli pulled his daughter into his arms and whispered softly. "Let it go, baby girl. Don't argue with your mother. Remember, she and I raised you and your brother, so we're qualified to take care of our grandson. Go and watch your husband play, Cruz will be just fine."
Olivia looked at her father. She knew Cruz would be okay; this wasn't the first time she'd left him with her parents. But it was the first time they came to Great Falls to babysit.
"Okay." She kissed her father's smooth cheek. "Thank you, Daddy." I'm going to have to learn to let go and not become a helicopter mom, she thought. The last thing she wanted to become was overbearing and smothering where her son was concerned.
"Everything you need is underneath the portable crib." She pointed to the well stocked Pack 'n Play in the corner of the family room. It was there to keep them from having to go up and down the stairs. "Diapers, wipes, extra onesies, spit up cloths, etc. There are also plastic bags for soiled diapers and a garbage can in the mudroom for the plastic bags. If you need anything else, check the nursery. I pumped extra milk and the freezer's full. The bags are dated and stored in the middle freezer drawer."
Her parents stood listening, indulging their daughter. They knew all this. They'd been to Great Falls a few times to watch Fitz's games with her, and of course to spend time with their grandson.
"Got it," Eli said. He smiled and kissed her cheek.
"Okay, okay," she said laughing. "I'm finished." She walked over to her mother and kissed her cheek.
"He's going to be fine, Olivia."
"I know, Mom." She smiled at her baby and then kissed his forehead. He was adorable in his little Team jersey and the tiniest and cutest pair of blue jeans she'd ever seen. "Bye, Cruzy. Mommy's going to miss you so much." She kissed him again and turned to leave before she changed her mind.
XXX
Olivia was glad she'd decided to finally attend a game. She'd actually missed some of the ladies, more than she expected. When she'd entered the suite she was immediately swept up into the Wives Club. There were greetings, congratulations, laughter and hugs. Most of the ladies seemed genuinely happy to see her, even Benny. They would never be best friends, but they were on much better terms.
It was good to see everybody because aside from a visit from Lauren and Tracee, she'd been absent. About a month after she'd given birth, she'd invited the two for a visit because she missed them, and she was so starved for company and was feeling shut-in. Bert had prepared lunch and they'd eaten, laughed and gossiped for over three hours.
One month ago…
"Liv we really miss you at the meetings," Tracee said. "You could always check Benny with just a look."
The trio laughed.
"How is she anyway?" Olivia asked. "She sent a beautiful floral arrangement and gift baskets for me AND Cruz."
"Benny is Benny," Lauren shrugged and took a sip of her Bellini.
"I sent a thank-you card, of course, but I also called her. She surprised me when she said, 'We're a team, Olivia. We're always here for each other.'"
"Benny Maddox?" Tracee asked, surprised.
Olivia laughed. "Yes, Benny Maddox."
"You know she's not so bad once you get to know her," Lauren added.
Both Olivia's and Tracee's heads snapped in her direction and she laughed at the expressions on their faces.
"Okay, no more Bellinis for you," Tracee said trying to pry the champagne flute from Lauren's hand.
"She may be the perfect NFL trophy wife, but she also takes her role as leader of the Wives Club very seriously." When neither Olivia nor Tracee responded, Lauren continued. "I know the two of you don't always see eye to eye, Liv, but she's a different person away from the Club and the Team."
"Yeah, but she has no identity outside the club," Tracee said.
"True," Lauren agreed. "Since I head the Finance committee, Benny and I talk a lot. When I suggested she find something else to do, she told me, 'this is all I have, Lauren. I can't have children and I don't know when the next groupie will come and try to take my husband. And then Olivia called me out about not having a life outside of Jake and that pissed me off…because it was the truth. I live everyday with the fear that Jake can drop me for the next young thing.'"
"What?!" Tracee almost screamed, causing Olivia to glance at Cruz who was asleep.
Lauren nodded. "I told her that if she felt that way, she should make sure she still had a life with or without Jake. I mean, she's a party planner and she's very good at it. She organizes all of our events. Why not make a career out of it?"
"She is very good at it," Olivia agreed. Benny had actually shared her insecurities about herself and her husband with her. She always knew there was more behind that mean girl behavior. It was worry and uncertainty.
"She said she never really thought about it."
"Well she should," Olivia said, "especially if she's having doubts about her marriage. She needs to be able to take care of herself."
"I agree," Tracee added.
"Benny's planning Joey's thirtieth birthday party in December," Olivia casually mentioned.
Two shocked faces stared at her.
"That's actually why I called her. It was a favor for J."
"You would help her after the bitch she's been to you?"
Olivia looked at Tracee and nodded. "I'm going to be the bigger person and try to help her."
Tracee took a large swallow of her drink and side-eyed Olivia.
"What?"
"Nothing."
"I did ask if she'd ever thought about party planning professionally because she has the gift for it."
"It would definitely give her something to do," Tracee said. "Her entire life revolves around football."
"Apparently, Jake feels that it would take too much time away from the Team and the Wives Club. The only reason he doesn't have a problem with her planning parties right now is because they're for her teammates."
"Oh, wow," Lauren said, clearly tipsy.
"Yeah, I didn't know."
"None of us did," Tracee added. "But it certainly explains a lot."
"I told her I would help her because she should do what makes her happy."
"And I don't think she's been happy for a while."
"I don't understand why she just doesn't do what she loves," Lauren said.
"I asked and she told me that not everyone has a husband like mine. A husband who actually values and supports me, and what I want to do. And if she pushes the issue she risks losing Jake."
Lauren listened, trying to wrap her mind around what she was hearing. "But from what I've seen, he loves her."
"Well according to Benny he does in his own way."
"Damn." Tracee was beginning to feel bad for all the unkind things she'd ever said about Benny Maddox.
"She's tired of the Team and the Club being her entire world, and since she met me, she wants more."
"So WE didn't inspire her," Lauren said pointing to herself and Tracee. "It took YOU joining the club, and telling her about herself to make her see that she can have a life outside football."
Olivia laughed and nodded. "I was surprised too. She admitted that, though she may not have always shown it, she appreciated me being nice to her because she knew she wasn't my favorite person, and she didn't deserve my benevolence."
Lauren and Tracee laughed. "That's a major understatement, Liv," Tracee said.
"Well I think you showed her a huge amount of grace when you gave her a second chance after the way she treated you at your first Club meeting, and at Family Day."
Tracee nodded, agreeing with Lauren.
"So is she willing to lose Jake to do what she wants?" Tracee asked.
"She said some days she is, some days she's not." Olivia glanced at her friends. "I told her that whatever she decides, if she needs help, I will help her. She thanked me and quickly ended the call."
"I don't think she's used to anyone being nice to her without wanting something in return," Lauren said shaking her head.
"I didn't know she was so unhappy. Jake is an asshole." Tracee spoke matter of fact.
Olivia agreed and was determined to encourage her to follow her dreams as much as possible. Jake Maddox had never been one of her favorite people, but on the field, he had Fitz's back and she would always appreciate him for that. She didn't like the way he treated Benny, and although she allowed it, it still wasn't right. Plus, Benny was the reason she didn't have to worry about running the Club, and she was grateful for that.
As wife of the Team Captain, the expectation was for Olivia to take over the Wives Club, but she still had zero interest. Benny had been doing a great job for years, and no one had challenged her position, so why change what was working. Besides, she had a new baby and soon, a new job. She didn't have the time.
The friends continued to laugh and talk until young Mr. Grant woke, loudly demanding to be fed…again. Tracee took Lauren's keys and they all said their goodbyes with hugs and kisses, promising to get together again soon.
XXX
Current…
As Olivia moved about the suite greeting everyone, she felt eyes on her back. She turned and saw Benny staring at her with a small smile on her perfectly made up face. She walked over to her and Benny hugged her, tight.
"It's good to see you, Benny."
"It's good seeing you too, Olivia."
There were looks of surprise and shock as the two women greeted each other with hugs and put their heads together in conversation. When did that happen, most wondered, but both women ignored the looks and continued to talk for a few minutes before Olivia moved on.
Joey and Julian were already seated when she arrived. They'd attended a few games as Fitz's guest. They both stood when she approached them and hugged her.
"Liv!" Joey exclaimed. "How are you? How's my godson? Do you have any new pictures?"
Olivia laughed because Joey hadn't given her a chance to answer her first question before she asked another on. After several pictures were shared, and they all caught up, everyone settled in to watch the Team.
By the fourth quarter, the Team was up by two touchdowns. The offensive line had been shaky all day but they'd managed to score twenty-eight points. And then the unthinkable happened. With just over ten minutes left in the game, the right tackle missed a block and Fitz was drilled in his right side by the opposing defensive end. He crashed to the field hard and immediately grabbed his midsection. Olivia stood to her feet, as did everyone else, and watched in horror as he lay on the ground. When he didn't get up, the referee called a time out and the team doctors ran onto the field to check him out.
Olivia's worst nightmare was happening again. Ever since she'd attended her first game, she always sat thinking, 'Please, God, don't let anything happen to him.' Every week, every game, every hit, she was always thinking the same thing, 'Just get up.' Whenever he suited up, her throat would start to tighten. Her worst nightmare had come true as she watched him lying motionless on the field after he'd been kicked in the head and suffered a mild concussion, but there hadn't been any real scares since that day. Until now. Her eyes zeroed in on his prone body for any movement and she released the breath she'd been holding when she saw movement in his arms and legs. She didn't even realize she was yelling for him to get up as her heart climbed into her throat. Unfortunately, Dre had other obligations and hadn't attended the game so she couldn't call him to find out what was going on.
Olivia watched, along with everyone else, on the Jumbrotron, as the play was shown in slow motion. The image of her husband, best friend, lover and the father of her child being upended and landing hard on the ground brought tears to her eyes. A minute later, a cart was driven onto the field and Fitz was helped to his feet and he slowly climbed onto the back. Olivia didn't miss the grimace on his face. The crowd cheered as he waved and the cart drove across the field and disappeared into the tunnel.
With tears streaming down her face, she grabbed her things and turned to Joey and Julian.
"I need to get to him. I need to get to my husband!" She nearly yelled.
Before either of them could respond, Benny grabbed her hand. "Come on, let's go." The women walked to the entrance of the suite, with Joey and Julian on their heels, where they were met by security. They all walked quickly behind the three large men until a golf cart met them. Benny hugged her and whispered near her ear. "He's going to be okay. Don't let him see you like this. Breathe. Okay?" This was the most compassion she'd ever showed toward Olivia, and she appreciated it.
Olivia nodded and hugged her former nemesis, then took the front seat, while Joey and Julian sat on the back. The cart drove them down to the locker room where Team personnel were waiting.
"Mrs. Grant, the team doctor has confirmed it's definitely a rib injury but we're not sure of the severity."
Olivia gasped and finally let go, collapsing into her big brother's arms. She cried at the uneasiness she was feeling, praying that it wasn't as bad as it looked.
Joey took her hand, holding it tight in comfort.
"Liv?" She turned at her name being called, and saw T.C. standing with Ty's mother, tears in her eyes. She walked over to the young woman and hugged her. "It's a rib injury, T. They're not sure how severe just yet."
"He's going to be okay," Mrs. Henry said, trying to assure both women.
"Yes, he will," Joey agreed.
Olivia paced back and forth, wringing her hands, refusing to take a seat while they waited. After ten long minutes, Fitz was finally wheeled out on a stretcher, and he didn't look happy. He tried to smile when he saw her but the pain was too intense. His jersey had been removed and he was wearing a Team t-shirt.
Olivia wanted to hug him so bad but she was too afraid, so she took his hand and kissed it. "Don't scare me like that again."
"Livvie, don't cry. It's not as bad as it looks. They made me get on this thing, but I can walk," he pouted. "My ribs may be fractured, but I'll be able to play again this season. I can't let the team down."
She looked at the doctor. "Is he really okay?"
"His vitals are good, but he's in a lot of pain. We're taking him to UM Medical in Largo for more tests," he added. "You can follow us if you'd like."
Olivia nodded. She leaned over and softly kissed her husband's lips. "We're right behind you, baby. Okay?"
"I love you, Livvie."
"I love you more." The grin he gave her was genuine but didn't put her nerves or mind at ease at all.
The stretcher was carefully loaded into the ambulance, the doors closed and the vehicle quickly drove away.
"Give me your keys, Liv. I'm driving your car and Josephine's going to follow us."
"I'll ride with Joey," T.C. said.
"And we'll meet you at the hospital after the game is over," Mrs. Henry added.
Olivia knew arguing with her brother was futile, and she didn't really have it in her to do so. She was just happy her big brother, her bestie and her sister-in-law were with her. Silently, she handed her brother her keys and the foursome hurried to the parking lot praying that the news about Fitz's injury was good.
TBC