When she gets back from the shower, her laptop is on the bed, and he is gone. The post-it note on her laptop says, "France?" She walks into the living room to find him asleep on the couch.
The jovial mood he left her in was not the same one she had in the morning. They said goodbye to Mishka before he left for work and then her grandmother took them to the train station.
She stayed in her cabin for the majority of the trip while Wheeler was up and about, chatting with other passengers, appreciating the view as they traveled through the old European towns. Maybe this stuff was not interesting to Linka, but to Wheeler, the architecture is unlike anything he's ever seen. It's not until he sees all these older towns and buildings that he realizes how much younger America is compared to the rest of the world.
He goes to her cabin to see her.
"I'm going to get some dinner. Wanna come?"
"Nyet."
"Please. I hate eating alone."
"I will not be good company."
"That's ok. You don't have to say anything, just keep me company so that I don't look like a loser sitting alone…besides, there's this girl that keeps…"
"I SAID NYET! I thought you knew that means 'NO'!"
"Ok, ok, fine. Sorry. Just thought you'd be hungry."
It's obvious to Wheeler that Linka is not ok with him taking it upon himself to 'make a donation' to her fertility cause. Feeling like the rest of their trip is ruined now, all because of his stupid decision to listen to the receptionist at the lab. All because he selfishly thought that HE could be the one to make Linka's dreams of motherhood come true. And he stupidly believed that she would want him to. Obviously after spending the rest of last night and all of today thinking about it, she was angry with him.
He goes to the dining car and takes a seat, even though he's no longer hungry. While he's looking over the menu, he hears someone ask,
"Is this seat taken?"
He looks up to see the young French woman who has been trying to get his attention all day.
"Uh…not really…but I kinda just want to be alone."
"Nonsense! No one wants to be alone! And eating alone…that is just sad. I cannot, in good conscious let you do that," she says as she sits down across from him.
She rambles on while Wheeler attempts to listen. His own problems are weighing heavy on his mind though.
"I thought you said earlier that you were on this trip with someone, but I have yet to see you with anyone…are you lying? Trying to make yourself seem more appealing? Because you do not need to. You are just as appealing as a lonely stranger," she says as she reaches across the table for his hand.
"There you are!" A familiar Russian voice says as she slides her arm around Wheeler's neck, sits on his lap, turns his face towards hers, and presses her lips to his. He is slow to react, too shocked and unsure of what is going on, but soon he is puckering his lips beneath hers. "I was worried when you did not come back. I thought you were bringing dinner to our cabin."
"I uhhh, haven't ordered yet," he stammers, wishing they could go back to kissing. She blindsided him with that kiss just like she did in Russia when they thought she was leaving the Planeteers to take care of her ailing Grandma.
"Hello," his companion says to Linka, offering her hand. "I am Michelle…the reason he is late…and you are?"
"Linka. His girlfriend."
The Russian is surprised at how easily that lie was to tell. It wasn't as hard as she thought it would be.
"Oh, so you are real. He has been saying that he is not traveling alone, but every time I see him, he is alone."
Linka instantly dislikes this woman. Wheeler told her he was with someone, yet she still persisted in pursuing him. Linka also notes that Wheeler could have easily taken Michelle up on whatever she was offering, but he didn't.
"I have not been feeling well," Linka explains. "But now that I am, I thought he was going to bring dinner back to our cabin so that we can make up for all the time we have missed while I was unwell."
Whatever game Linka is playing, Wheeler likes it and plays along.
"Umm, we can go back if you want, once we order…we can have it delivered."
"We can just stay here…that way we will not be interrupted by someone having to come pick up our plates."
"Uh, right…good thinking Babe," he agrees.
"Let me see the menu," she asks before leaning forward and kissing his cheek. "Do you know what you want?"
"Yes."
She catches a difference in the tone of his voice.
"I do too."
She folds the menu and puts it down on the table, never looking away from him.
Wheeler's breathing slows. Is this part of the act? Or is she admitting something?
She whispers something in his ear in French, hoping that he has no idea how to speak French, but knowing that she has whispered loud enough for Michelle to hear. In order for him to react like he knew what she meant, and not look at her with a questioning look, she pokes her fingers into his side. He laughs and when he turns to face her, she can see that he's about to reveal that he has no idea what she just said…for that, she is thankful, but in order to keep up their rouse, Michelle can't know that. So Linka makes a bold move and quickly covers his lips with hers again.
This time, Wheeler doesn't waste any time being caught off guard and is an active participant. He's been waiting for this moment since the moment he met her, many years ago. He intends to make the most of it. Linka has forgotten that they are only putting on an act for Wheeler's admirer once he took the lead and she has lost herself in their kiss. When they do come up for air, they find that they are alone. She slides off his lap and takes the chair next to him.
"Well, looks like that worked."
"Da," she says, her cheeks burning.
"Thanks."
"You are welcome."
They both burst into laughter at the awkwardness of the last five minutes, and she rests her head on his shoulder.
"Is she still looking?"
"Yeah, I think our laughing got her attention…and everyone else's."
"Then I guess while we are in public, we should keep up appearances," she says as she takes his hand.
"Umm, yeah…ok," he replies as he laces his fingers with hers. "So, all these years I'd flirt with other girls to make you jealous and then the one time I'm not even showing any interest in a girl, you get jealous and put on a very convincing act to chase her off."
"Is that not what you wanted?"
"I wanted her gone, yeah. I'm just surprised at your methods," he chuckles.
She worries he doesn't appreciate her little act. Maybe she took it too far. As nice as it was, it was not fair to him.
"Sorry…I came on a little too strong. I just wanted to make it convincing."
"Ah…well, you had me fooled," he says dejectedly. "So do you want to have your dinner delivered to your cabin after we order so you don't have to keep pretending you're not pissed at me?"
"Nyet. I have had enough of my cabin…and why do you think I am pissed at you?"
"For the umm, you know…the sample."
"Oh Wheeler," she says as she puts her hand on his cheek. "I am sorry you thought I was mad at you…I was just having a moment of self-pity. I realized I was harsher than I intended in my cabin earlier. I am sorry I took it out on you. I am not mad at you…for anything…and especially not for that. I am actually flattered that you would do that for me."
"Really?!"
"Da. That is…it takes a true friend to be willing to go that far for another friend."
Could he really admit to her that he wasn't doing it as a friend? That he wanted to do it for her because he loves her. That he wants to have this permanent bond with her. Or will that be pushing his luck? Will that be an admission that ruins the rest of their trip and their friendship?
The arrival of the waiter leaves that question unanswered.
"Ready to order?" The waiter asks.
"Yes," she says to the waiter, then turns to Wheeler and says, "We can talk more after dinner, ok?"
"Yeah, ok."
They place their orders and make small talk.
He comments on his observation about the architecture and just as he thought, she admitted she never paid much attention to it. He also comments about the beautiful landscape of the countryside, untouched by industrialization and commercialism. No shopping malls, just land.
"You have those things in America too Yankee…you are just used to the city. There are mountains, and big sky, open land, forests…Perhaps we should add that to our list? A cabin on the lake in the woods, with a snowcapped mountain range in the background?"
"Sounds beautiful…you find it, I'll be there."
"I will make it my mission then!" She says as she bumps her shoulder against his.
"You're too good to me," he replies, returning her bump and leaning his head down to rest against hers. "I think my not-so-secret admirer has gotten the picture."
He nods over in Michelle's direction. She has moved on to a new conquest.
"Sorry to chase her away," she says, not sorry at all.
"Don't be. That's not the kinda girl I wanna be with. She was just looking for a one-night stand…or however many nights it takes to get from Russia to France. I'm looking for something more…long term."
"Really?"
"Yeah…and I'm trying not to be offended that you're so surprised!"
"Sorry…it is just…I suppose I should not be surprised…you are older now…we both are…things change," she says quietly.
"Some things have been the same for a long time…we just don't realize it."
"Or we do…we just ignore it. Sometimes, it is just easier for people to ignore changes…to keep things status quo."
"Why do you think that is?" He asks.
"Fear."
"Of what?"
"How does the saying go? 'If it is not damaged, do not repair it?'"
"Somethin' like that… 'If it ain't broke, don't fix it' is how most would say it," he informs her.
She cringes and shakes her head.
"English is not my first language, but even I know that is horrible."
"For the prim and proper like you, yeah…for stupid bums like me, it's fine."
"You are not a bum. And you are certainly not stupid."
"Thanks…I'm glad you think so," he smiles at her appreciatively. "You know, just because Michelle left me alone, doesn't mean we have to stop our little act…just in case she's still watching."
"Da…just in case."
She's enjoying having the "old Wheeler" back. Ever since she revealed her secret to him, it seems as if he's been treading lightly around her, not wishing to upset her.
She puts her hand over his as they wait for their meals to arrive. When they do, she offers him a bite of her grilled chicken salad, which he declines. She then tries to steal one of his fries with her fork.
"HEY!" He stops her and pulls the fry off her fork. "That is NOT how you eat fries, and I will not allow it! They're a FINGER food, so you HAVE TO use your fingers."
He picks up a fry and holds it up to her mouth, but when she goes to take a bite, he pulls it away.
"Wheeler!"
"Sorry…here," he says as he holds it up again.
Once again, he pulls it away, doing it several more times and laughing. She's laughing too as she grabs his wrist and holds his hand still, finally able to take a bite.
The commotion has drawn the attention of their fellow passengers, causing them to smile at the playful young couple.
"You are a brat!" Linka says as she giggles.
"It was worth it to see you smile."
Her smile widens as she looks deep into his eyes. There's a devilish gleam and Wheeler is too late to react once he realizes that while he was distracted, she has just taken a few of his fries.
"Now who's the brat?!" He asks.
"You must be wiping off on me," she says as she victoriously pops a fry into her mouth.
"Rubbing off," he corrects.
"Whatever," she says as she waves a fry in front of his face, quickly pulls it away when he tries to bite it, and pops it into her mouth.
They finish their meals, keeping a friendly conversation going the whole time.
"So, are you ready to go back to your room or are you gonna hang out here with me and be social now?" He asks.
"I thought we had made it clear that we had…plans after dinner," she says as she nods towards Michelle.
"Oh right…gotta keep up appearances," he whispers as he leans in and rests his forehead against hers.
"Da."
He stands up and pulls her chair out for her, takes her hand, and lets her lead the way. She makes a point to stop near Wheeler's admirer, turns to face him, puts her arms around his neck, and asks,
"If sex on a plane is the mile high club, what do they call sex on a train?"
Wheeler is taken aback at first, but smiles and says,
"The mile long club?"
She laughs and says with a wicked grin,
"Oh Lyubov, do not brag!"
She laughs even harder at the look on his face, and then takes off down the hallway, pulling him behind her. His stunned expression is replaced by a huge grin. She never ceases to amaze him.
They arrive at her door. She goes inside and turns to look at him when he releases her hand and doesn't follow.
"You are not coming in?"
"No one else is around, Babe. You can drop the act," he says with a slightly disappointed tone.
"I know…but I thought we were going to continue the conversation we were having before dinner…unless you do not want to."
"Oh…yeah…I do."
"Good because I have more to say, and I really think this conversation should be private."
"Ok," he says, coming into her room and closing the door.
She scoots back on the bed, folds her legs underneath her, and then pats the bed indicating to him to take a seat.
"Sorry for the lack of seating," she apologizes.
"No problem. At least this is more private than the dining area."
"Da." She picks at the comforter as he waits for her to continue. She looks up at him sheepishly. "Sorry."
"It's ok. Take your time."
"It is just…I want to make sure I get it right."
"I promise not to laugh…or talk until you're done. I won't even look at you while you're talking if you don't want."
"I do not want that," she says as she reaches for his hand. He looks up at her and squeezes her hand. She takes a deep breath and continues. "I want to thank you again for making this journey with me. The good has far outweighed the bad…and even the bad made me realize something…you are a good friend…a great friend…and a great man. You have really changed since we first met…or maybe my first impression of you was really, really wrong."
"Well, I'll admit, I didn't exactly make a great one."
"I do not suppose that I did either with my nastiness…but you never gave up on me…and you still have not. I shared a secret with you that I have not shared with anyone else, and you have been by my side ever since. You have even made the extra effort to try to find a way to make it possible."
"Yeah, a lot of good that did. I led us right into a trap."
"Unknowingly…but you also saved us from that trap…and this is where I have found the good in the bad. What you did…what you were willing to do for me…I doubt any other friend would have been so…generous?" She laughs. "I do not think that is the word I want."
"It kinda works. I know what you're going for…and for the record, I'd do it again."
"You would?"
"Well, yeah…if you needed me to…but like I said, I know that if you ever did have the opportunity to get pregnant, you'd have the option to choose a donor…to find one that matches your exact specifications."
"Da, I would…I would choose someone exactly like you, and if you are offering, I would accept that offer."
"Well then…I'm offering," he confirms.
"Ok…thank you…and if you change your mind and decide you do not want to…or if it takes awhile before a viable option is found and you are involved with someone and would not feel right…" she trails off as she lowers her head to look at her lap.
He's a little disappointed that she would still think that he would ever be involved with someone else or that she's still not considering the possibility of a future with him.
"Hey," he says as he puts a finger under her chin and lifts it. "The answer is yes. No matter what. If you need me, I'm here for you."
"Thank you," she says, leaning forward to hug him.
He returns her hug, tucking his chin over her shoulder and holding her tight.
"You're welcome."
"So, why France?" She asks.
"Ever hear the story about Our Lady of Lourdes?"
To Be Continued…