Disclaimer: Don't own Spy X Family, nor any of its characters.
Rating: T
A series of connected one-shots, where the duo have come to realize a certain reality they've been trying to deny, and gradually move forward from there.
Nighttime
Within no time, Loid got to folding and re-tucking the bedsheets, as they'd been starting to slip from their tucked positions. It happened every so often over time, but he mused that it would be nice if they didn't... after today's events though, this (among other things) had been a nice break from all the mission-related excitement.
Partway through, his mind wandered; he'd noticed earlier that Yor had been eyeing him on occasion, seemingly thinking about something.
"Whatever it was, it's nearly time for bed. Maybe she forgot" he mused, his hands still working. "Perhaps she'll remember tomorrow."
A little afterward, he finished his task, and made sure to double-check just in case; it all looked good.
Idly, he heard Yor's footsteps coming this way, most likely headed to her room after taking care of Anya.
Just as they got close however, they paused... and didn't pick back up.
Loid glanced toward his door, curious- is she just standing out there, thinking about something?
After some time:
Knock knock
"Um, Loid?"
Loid fully turned toward the door. "What is it, Yor?"
"Can we talk?"
She sounded rather hesitant, he noted. "Sure" he answered with ease. "You can come in."
"Ah... I'd rather stand out here for this."
That perked his attention; her words, and the hesitation made him believe this was something big, perhaps even what she'd been eyeing him over earlier. Still, he habitually put those thoughts to the side as he agreed, resolved to first talk and see what the issue is, then go from there - if he assumes it's something and is wrong, that'd just be counterproductive.
Barely a few seconds later, he opened the door- Yor stood there as expected, already dressed for bed in her robe. Just from a glance, he could see that she's nervous, but also resolved and earnest beneath that... still, he closed the door behind him and just stood nearby.
"Alright, I'm here" Loid whispered, gentle.
Yor dipped her head a little, hands fidgeting with each other. "Well..." she started hesitant, before seeming to try steeling herself. "Loid, you- do you remember that night at the hotel?"
She must mean that little family trip they took some time ago.
"Where Anya fell asleep, and then we shared the other bed?" he asked, to which Yor nodded (if cheeks reddening). "Yeah, I remember that."
"R-Right. Um... I was thinking that..."
Yor took a bit of time, and he mused that this definitely seemed to be embarrassing for her; even so, he patiently waited.
"...Mmm, could we possibly do that again?" she said, rather quickly. "T-The bed thing?"
He was shocked ("Ah?"), before in a micro-second he instinctively tried to compose himself again... though he barely succeeded, and even then he wasn't sure how 'well' that entailed.
Meanwhile, getting her initial question out seemed to open a floodgate for Yor: "I-I don't think I can do it tonight, Loid. I only just worked up the courage to ask you this now" she continued, still quick and only half-whispered at points. "But even so, I- I don't think I'd mind trying it again... um, on occasion. I'm not sure I could handle it happening every night either, even if all we do is sleep!"
"...I see" Loid breathed, before carefully looking at her-
-she slowly did the same too, her breathing a bit heavier.
He gave a small smile, though inwardly he wasn't quite as confident. "I'm glad you worked up the courage to ask me that, Yor. I'm proud of you" he said, gentle - she made a sound, seeming amazed. "And, I'm okay with it."
"You are?"
"Of course. Also, I want you to know that you were to change your mind tonight, and want to sleep beside me tonight instead of waiting, I'd be okay with that too."
Yor hitched, but though a little red, she still seemed okay.
Loid briefly closed his eyes. "But beyond saying that, I'm not going to push you" he admitted. "In many cases, tackling a difficult thing right away is usually best, yet everyone needs to move at their own pace above all else."
"Oh" she breathed, if curious now. "Is that another thing you tell your patients?"
"Of a sort, but it's also good life advice as well."
To that, she nodded slightly, before holding her hands together - yet after a moment, Yor smiled.
"It definitely sounds like good advice" she whispered, if earnest. "Thank you, Loid. You know so much that I don't."
Loid began to rub one hand along his neck, briefly sheepish. "There's plenty you've taught me too, Yor" he gently countered, and she didn't deny it. "But perhaps we should get to sleep."
"Hehe, yeah, probably."
"...Oh, I almost forgot" he said, after a moment; Yor jolted. "This isn't something you need to answer right away, Yor, but I was just wondering: if we're going to occasionally sleep beside each other now, maybe we should alternate who sleeps beside each other?"
She jolted, surprised.
"You know, one night you might sleep beside me in my room" he outlined, still gently. "And another time, I might sleep beside you in your room. If that's okay with you..."
A few moments passed before she could answer.
"Well, it- it sounds reasonable to me" she breathed, if more nervous. "Though um, I might need some time to think on it, before I'm sure."
"Of course" he agreed, softer.
Yor nodded, but then just looked at him before her gaze wandered... it took him a moment to notice, but he thought her gaze was lined squarely on his cheek. He briefly wondered what that's about, but then she seemed to jolt and - after another pause - slowly step toward him. When he saw her arms start to spread out, Loid subtly jolted in realization, but quickly held his arms open in an accepting manner. This made it easier for Yor to close the distance between them, enveloping him in a hug... she didn't linger for long, but even in that moment, the feeling of it was just right.
"Good night, Loid."
"Same to you, Yor.
In the aftermath of this, he began to think that perhaps she'd been thinking of kissing his cheek, instead of the hug she ended up going for. After all, he's done so to her on a (very small) handful of occasions now, but she's yet to return the favor... the thought wasn't a bad one, for sure.
Several days later
Morning
"Papa, here's your hat!"
"Oh yes" he agreed, smiling gently as he took it. "Thank you. I wouldn't look half as professional without it."
Yor smiled, even as she held onto his to-do list for today. "That's not true at all, Loid" she assured, if slightly playful. "You always look professional when you're going off to work."
Loid chuckled. "Why thank you, Yor" he agreed, before looking back at his daughter. "Now, Anya, I know that you still have to get ready for school, so be sure to do that now. Alright?"
"Kay! Anya's going real fast!"
Even as Anya moved away, Yor let out a breath, realizing that this might be her chance- but if she doesn't act fast, she'll miss it!
Her heart beat faster, and she held her hands up...
"...Um, Loid?"
Having been half-turning, he paused, glancing at her. "Hmm?"
"Could you close your eyes for a moment?" she asked, almost doing the same.
He blinked, clearly surprised and seeming to wonder for a moment... but after that, he nodded slightly and did just that. Yor let out a small breath at the sight, relieved and glad that he's not asking why, leaving her to think that he must trust her a great deal, even if he thinks this is something small.
B-But anyway, she stepped closer before she could freeze up, and soon was right next to him-
-even then, her heart was pounding; she kept telling herself it's not a big deal though!
Especially once she's already done it!
Yor nearly swallowed, but after a moment spent shaking, she stepped closer again... she rested her hands on his shoulders, mostly to help steady herself. Loid moved slightly, which almost distracted her before she sought to keep going, if closing her eyes in the process!
It took a little, b-but eventually she touched her lips to his cheek!
Even as she quickly pulled back, embarrassed and cheeks reddening, Loid made a sound- she couldn't fully look at him, but she saw his hand rise near his cheek.
Mmm...
"I- I hope you liked that, Loid" she mumbled, half without realizing.
She didn't see this, but Loid's cheeks had reddened slightly as he looked at her, wondering... then he smiled, and it disappeared.
"I did, Yor" he breathed, gentle - she looked at him, startled. "Thank you."
Yor wasn't able to answer, a little breathless.
He seemed to chuckle once, before his fingers rose- she moved when he gently touched her cheek a bit, his fingers moving in place there before pulling back. Then with a nod/tip of his hat, Loid turned and started walking toward the door - she was left staring after him, even after he closed it behind him, slowly touching where his fingers had been.
Unbeknownst to herself, she smiled after a little, relieved yet also happy.
/
Nighttime
Loid's room
He'd expected this to be awkward and all, especially at first, but...
Loid glanced to his right; Yor lay there a good foot away, her back half-to him, but he could tell that she's still nowhere close to being asleep. Even now the aspects of this whole situation were different: her weight on the bed beside him, her breathing, the way she shifted, the slightest sounds of rustling clothes, and faint scents that he presumed were her natural ones.
It's all so... distracting.
Granted, he'd dealt with these same distractions during that night at the hotel, but it was nowhere near as difficult then because it'd been for their cover. Yor had probably thought something similar at the time, as other than that initial few minutes after she'd turned her back, he'd subtly observed her seeming more relaxed afterward.
"If this tension sticks around, it'll take much longer than it should to get used to this. For both of us" he thought, before closing his eyes. "Think, Twilight: what's best to ease Yor's mind right now?"
After all, if she was at ease, it'd become easier for him too.
"...Yor?" he whispered.
She moved slightly, surprised before her head turned toward him. "W- What is it, Loid?"
Angling himself more onto his side, he let out a faint breath. "Unless I'm mistaken... we seem to be having some difficulty falling asleep, unlike at the hotel" he mused - she let out a breath, carefully turning more toward him. "So, I was thinking that perhaps we can talk about something again, or maybe engage in small affections. Some way to help break the tension."
There was a slight redness in her cheeks at 'affections', but otherwise she finished turning onto her back, if remaining that way for now.
"I think that's a good idea" she whispered, if glancing down. "Though, um... w- what kind of affections did you have in mind?"
He barely needed a moment before he smiled.
"Well, if not a kiss or two, I was thinking more along the lines of our fingers" he breathed, gentle- she made a sound. "Simply brushing them over each other's arms, cheeks, hair, maybe other places if we feel up to it... and we can talk while doing so. Or we can just talk, of course."
"...Mmm" Yor breathed, if fidgeting once. "I- I think I'd still prefer the... kissing, for tonight. After talking, I mean."
"Alright. Anything you'd like to talk about first?"
His quick, gentle acceptance definitely seemed to help her; a little smile came up, and she was less nervous.
"Well, um, actually" she slowly admitted, turning more toward him now, her expression earnest (if also a little red). "I wanted to say that you were the first person to ever... call me pretty."
He made a sound, surprised.
She glanced off for a bit, but her smile was sweet. "It really surprised me, that day in the tailor shop" Yor whispered, "I'd never had a stranger look at me like that before, and I thought maybe you had some problem with me, until you said what you did."
After blinking, Loid gave a small chuckle.
"Well, it was the truth, Yor" he said, if perhaps slightly sheepish. "And it is still is. You are very pretty."
Yor's cheeks reddened more even as she shifted, somewhere between embarrassed and wondering. "Um... why?"
There's that insecurity...
"Well, as far as physical appearances?" he 'questioned', slowly reaching one hand over- Yor let out a little breath, but let him touch her cheek. "The color of your eyes is striking when intense, yet also gentle otherwise. Your hair is obviously well-taken care of, and thus is not only soft to touch, but pleasing to look at... and the same applies to your skin. Then of course, I believe your general figure - especially combined with your grace - are pleasing to the eye."
Her breathing was up, and he thought he saw steam starting to rise from her head-
-well, good thing he'd planned for if things became "too embarrassing".
"But by themselves, they're just good to look at, Yor" Loid continued, a bit more seriously as his hand did little circles. "If your personality was in complete contrast to your looks, I doubt I would have been staring at all."
Yor made a sound, surprised and blinking several times- it took a little time for her to adjust to this new information, but though her cheeks remained red, she seemed better by the end.
"...You mean, if I was a horrible person?" she wondered, curious.
"Something like that" he accepted. "If you were such, I would acknowledge your looks but they would have no effect upon me at all, because the person matters most. Yet as you were - and are - my impression was that you were a strong, very kind individual, and your looks compliment that quite well."
She gave off a little breath-
-unbeknownst to her (and him, partly), they'd scooted a bit closer somewhere along the way, with her hand slowly reaching for his cheek too.
"And I don't just mean physical strength, Yor" he added, a bit softer. "I mean strength-of-character, as you have incredible resolve and dedication to see things through. And of course, you're earnest and sincere in all that you do as well."
For a little, all Yor did was look at him... but then she smiled, her head dipping as her eyes closed.
"It means so much to hear you say that, Loid" she whispered, gentle. "I'm... I'm truly glad that of everyone on Earth, you're the one I married."
The little gasp, and the small rush of warmth he felt, were instinctive- of course he didn't "lose himself" to it, yet the fact remained.
Nevertheless, he smiled without realizing it.
"Me too, Yor."
She barely had time to make a sound, surprised before an even bigger one occurred: as soon as he'd finished, he moved over and kissed Yor. She squeaked, her hands holding onto him rather tightly, and he felt her shake a little... at first he worried that he might've jumped the gun, but then reminded himself that it could just be the shock/surprise.
Don't assume yet, Twilight; be patient.
It took a little, but Yor started to ease- not quite relaxed yet, but well enough that she slowly started to kiss him back. Even though he'd figured this would happen, Loid still felt relieved as he gently kept things up, before habitually focusing on his 'mission' right now... as part of that, he also decided to keep his fingers on her cheek for the time being, so Yor could take her time adjusting.
...
Her heart was pounding against her ribs... a-and yet, as nervous as she felt, she didn't want this to end right now.
Loid's really glad that he married me" Yor thought, feeling an even greater rush. "I- I didn't expect to hear him say that..."
Yet even though her mind tried to dwell upon it, her instincts were instead focused on returning the kiss. After all, if she stopped, Loid might be worried that she didn't want to continue... although if he was, he'd probably ask her first rather than assume.
She lightly pressed herself against him without realizing, yet slowly moved her fingers through his hair. She'd been meaning to do that for some time now, ever since their last kiss at the hotel, and she was amazed at the soft touch... but she was also distracted by Loid doing the same thing.
Just the feel of his fingers, his gentle touch... ah, b-but anyway she- she hoped her hair was equally as soft to the touch!
What felt like another minute passed, though maybe it was longer...
Loid pulled back slightly, and inhaled pretty heavily, even as she gasped and soon did the same, just having realized how little breath she had left-
-even so, the sensations on her lips wouldn't go away.
After a few seconds of panting:
"I... I didn't know kisses could go on for that long" Yor whispered.
Loid took some time before answering, yet even so, his hands kept her close to him just as she's unconsciously doing. Even now, one hand lightly moved in her hair, while the other firmly held itself around her back- it was a really nice feeling.
"Usually, they are quick" he breathed, closing his eyes for a bit - when she looked at him, he seemed to be resting (but not tired), and his cheeks were redder too. "But between partners who are quite close, the longer, involved kisses like such are equally desired. When they're alone, that is."
"Does being watched make it weird?"
"More-or-less. Whether the couple uses tongues or not, it tends to make people uncomfortable to watch."
Just before he finished, Yor blinked as the words sunk in... then she squeaked a little-
-which semi-startled him, as he opened his eyes. "Uh, Yor?"
"P-People taste each other during a kiss?" she mumbled, somewhere between surprised and curious. Privately, she wondered if this came from a desire to eat the other person... she somehow doubted it, but she couldn't think of any other reason either, so the thought remained in her mind.
Loid blinked twice, before slowly glancing off- he seemed nervous himself, or so she later realized.
"...Well, it- it feels better than it sounds" he whispered with effort. "The idea is that if you trust someone very well, and you both agree to it... you let them give intimate experiences that you wouldn't allow from anyone else. In that regard, it's- it's little different than using your fingers, or your lips, though more personal and intimate than either of those."
Oh, so it's like them?
That made more sense to her now; like with the kisses, you um... "use" your tongue to give your partner stimulation, not because you want to eat them, or that's what he's saying. She briefly wondered about it feeling better than it sounds, but quickly felt a flush of warmth at the thought- she wasn't sure whether or not she felt brave enough to even want to do so now, l-let alone try it.
Even so, she did have to suppress a gulp.
"...S-Sorry" she breathed, before getting better. "I was just surprised to hear that, Loid. I never learned about such a thing until tonight."
He slowly glanced back at her. "I see."
"..."
"So, uh... do you still want to continue?" Loid quietly asked, and (when she jolted) quickly added: "I mean, what we were doing."
Oh, oh right; their kissing. Quickly, she put her thoughts about the use of tongues out of her mind!
"Umm... y-yes."
A flicker of surprise, but then Loid got a small smile, closing his eyes and slowly moving toward her again- she did her best to return the favor, though her cheeks remained really red.
In the end, they forgot about the awkwardness of sleeping together in the same bed, mostly because they were both pretty tired (mentally) from their conversation. As a result, they fell asleep pretty quickly afterward, just gently arranged near each other - though not quite holding the other, her arm was definitely resting upon his, and her head was by the crook of his neck..
Though, um, waking up the next morning brought the awkwardness back in full force...
Even though they've technically done this before at the hotel, doing something once doesn't automatically make someone fully comfortable so soon
And also, the last time was 'kinda' for the job, whereas this isn't at all :P