JENNIE

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Sometimes you chip and chip at a brick wall until you're exhausted and still make no progress bringing it down. And other times, you pull out one brick and the entire thing starts to crumple. Leilani was the brick that had kept Lisa's wall standing. Everything seemed to have changed since sunrise this morning. It wasn't anything you could tell from the outside, but it was in the way Lisa showed me herself.

After she woke up, she'd driven me home and said she needed to run a few errands. But she'd asked me to pack an overnight bag and be ready when she came back in a few hours. To my surprise, she took me to her condo downtown. The building was a fancy high-rise overlooking the waterfront, with a doorman and security desk.

The uniformed guard nodded as we walked in. "Both your deliveries came and the crew just left, Ms. Manoban."

"Thanks, Fred."

I waited until we were in the elevator to quiz Lisa. "You have a crew?"

Lisa chuckled. She intertwined her fingers with mine. "You'll see." She slipped a card into a slot on the elevator panel and pushed a button: PH.

"Penthouse? Well, aren't you fancy? You should have told me your lair was this nice. Maybe I wouldn't have been such a pain in the ass about coming here."

Lisa lifted a brow. "My lair?"

"I thought it sounded nicer than fuckpad."

She pulled me to her side and kissed the top of my head. "I'm actually glad you refused to come here."

"Oh yeah? So why are we here now?"

"You'll see."

The elevator arrived on the fourteenth floor and opened directly into a huge foyer. A large, round marble table greeted us as we walked in. I looked around. The apartment was enormous. To the right was a sleek, modern stainless-steel kitchen, and straight ahead, a few steps down was a sunken living room with a full wall of floor-to-ceiling windows that overlooked the water. I walked straight to the glass to admire the view.

"Oh my God. This is gorgeous. I don't know why I was picturing some dark and seedy place. Oh wait…maybe I do. It's because of what you used this place for."

Lisa came up behind me and snaked her arms around my waist. "Used is the key word. Past tense."

I turned in her arms and wrapped my arms around her neck. "Are you saying you won't be using this beautiful apartment for any sexual activities anymore? That's sort of a shame."

"Not at all. I plan to use it for lots of fucking. Starting with you bending over and pressing your hands against the glass in just a little while. But the place is now a lot more exclusive."

"Exclusive, huh?" I teased. "Higher end one-night stands?"

Lisa rubbed her thumb over my lip and stared at it. "Just you, beautiful."

The tenderness in her voice made my heart flutter. Ever since our talk this morning, my emotions had been all over the place, and I started to feel myself getting a little choked up. Lisa saw it in my face and smiled as she brushed her lips with mine.

"Come on. Let me show you around."

We walked down a long hall. Lisa opened each door as we passed and pointed from the doorway, but didn't go inside.

"Office."

"Guest bedroom."

"Bathroom."

But when we got to the last door on the left, she opened it and took my hand to lead me inside what was obviously the master bedroom. The room had the same big floor-to-ceiling windows, a beautiful fireplace to one side, and a king-size bed in the center. Like the rest of the apartment, it was pretty stark on decoration, but what was there was beautiful and high quality.

Lisa walked to the bed and sat down, pulling me onto her lap. "Mattress is brand new. It was delivered today."

"Was something wrong with the old one?"

She looked into my eyes, and I felt the warmth of her gaze spread through my chest. "It had seven years of things I can't take back on it."

And those bricks just keep falling.

I cupped her cheek. "That was really thoughtful."

"Figured we could pick up some new bedding this afternoon before we christen it."

I smiled. "You better be careful, Ms. Manoban. Buying a new bed, taking me shopping—a girl could get used to all this sweetness."

Lisa looked at me in a way she hadn't before. Something was different. And that something made my heart race. I had put off making a decision about the long term, hoping something would organically happen to make it for me. And I suddenly realized it had: I'd fallen for her.

"Get used to it, sweetheart. It's what you deserve."

Falling…falling…falling so deep.

I was basically a pile of mush inside, and my self-protection mechanism had me needing not to fall so far that I lost myself. So I changed gears and smirked. "While we're picking up bedding, maybe we can pick up a few decorative things, too. The apartment is beautiful, but it's kind of…sterile. It needs some warmth."

"Whatever you want."

I kissed her one last time and dragged us from the bedroom. Feeling emotional and sitting on a big bed with this girl was dangerous territory on so many fronts. As we walked into the living room, I noticed a tag on the couch.

"Is that a brand new couch, too?"

Lisa nodded.

"You needed a new one?"

She shook her head slowly.

Oh. Oh. My nose scrunched up at the thought of Lisa screwing some woman on the couch. "Did you also get new countertops in the kitchen and a new desk?" I asked dryly.

Lisa shook her head. "No, smartass."

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I got the feeling Lisa didn't do much shopping. She looked completely awkward in a home goods store. Every time I asked if she liked something, she shrugged and nodded. "Sure, if you like it."

So I picked up the most hideous comforter set I'd ever seen. It looked like someone had taken the ugliest floral pattern in the world and laid it on top of a check print. Not only was it loud and made me a little dizzy, but the material was almost scratchy.

"How about this one?"

Lisa barely looked at it. "Sure, if you like it."

I shook my head. "It's the ugliest thing I've ever seen."

Her brows furrowed. "So why are you picking it out?"

"I'm not. I just wanted to see your reaction. You aren't really being helpful. I don't know what you like."

She smirked. "You naked. Just pick something you like and will be soft on your back. And your hands and knees."

Mmmm...That sounded good. Desire shot through me. Lisa noticed the change in my face and leaned forward to whisper in my ear with a growl. "Hurry. Or I'll be dragging you from this place and fucking you on a bare mattress soon."

Oh my.

I attempted to ignore the growing need between my legs and moved on to a display toward the back of the store. It was simple, a navy blue-and-white striped spread by Nautica. I ran my hand along the fabric—luxurious and soft.

"I feel like this one fits you."

It was the first time Lisa gave me an actual answer. "I like it. Simple. Maybe a few of those, too." She pointed to a display of throw pillows I hadn't noticed to my left. They were navy with burlap patches on the front and would go perfectly—continuing a bit of a nautical theme.

"Perfect. Look at you. You're a regular designer when you want to be."

Lisa looked over her shoulder and then to the left and right. I thought she was looking for other items to add to what we'd picked out. But I quickly realized she was seeing if the coast was clear. Before I could argue, she lifted me up and tossed me onto the bed. I landed on my back in the middle of the Nautica display. A wicked grin spread across her face as she nodded.

"It looks good together. Let's get it and get the hell out of here."

I was probably as ready to go as she was, but I so enjoyed screwing with her. I lifted up on my elbows on the bed. "But you said we could pick up some decorations. I figured we could check out the art store a few blocks away and then head over to that big lighting store on Fairway Blvd. I can spend hours in that place."

Lisa's face dropped.

I couldn't contain the smirk taking over my pout. She noticed and squinted. "You're screwing with me."

I smiled. "I figured it was only fair since you plan to screw me."

Lisa scooped me up off the bed, cradling me in her arms. She shifted my weight to one arm and grabbed the striped comforter set off the shelf. She walked to the throw pillow display and dipped forward.

"Grab a few."

I laughed but grabbed two I liked. She marched down an aisle toward a register on the other side of the store.

"Ummm… You're going to carry me to the line?"

"I am. Keeps you from stopping to look at shit and gets us to trying out the new bedding faster."

I giggled. A few people stared at the pretty woman carrying a girl and her purchases, but either Lisa didn't notice or didn't give a shit. "You realize you look like a Neanderthal."

"That's the way you make me feel, sweetheart. Don't worry. I'll make up for my ungentlewomanlike behavior when we get home."

Home. She'll make it up to me when we get home. I liked the sound of that for a lot of reasons.

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The next week was absolute bliss. Lisa and I stayed holed up in her condo for a day and a half—spending Sunday christening every surface we could. Then Monday morning she had to go to a meeting out of town, and a gigantic bouquet of flowers was delivered to the office. They took up half of my desk. Tuesday she met the plumbing contractor at my house so I could work late. Wednesday we ate lunch in her office and locked the door for a quickie. Thursday and Friday, we slept at my place.

On Saturday morning, she went into the office while I waited at my apartment for Rosé to come over. She'd come back from her honeymoon earlier in the week and officially moved into Jae's place, but she still had a ton of boxes at our apartment. We were going to take them over to Goodwill today after getting some lunch.

I practically sprinted to her when she walked in. It was probably the longest I'd gone without seeing her since we were kids.

"Honey, I'm home!" she yelled.

We embraced for the longest time, and when I pulled back, I shook my head. "Look at you. You're so tan and relaxed. And you look so…married." I smiled.

"I missed you. Kauai was amazing. But it would have been better if you were there, too. You would've loved the helicopter ride. Jae lost his lunch in a barf bag during the tour."

I laughed. "I'm sure that would have gone over well with your new husband. I'm taking two pieces of luggage and Jennie with me."

"We need to go back—a couples' vacation. Maybe Maui next time."

"That sounds great. Last weekend I asked Lisa when the last time she went on vacation was, and she said eight years ago."

"Really? Why?"

I shrugged. "She's a workaholic, and she didn't have anyone in her life to force the issue, I guess."

Rosé went into the refrigerator, pulled out the orange juice, and looked at the container. "Pulp? Is this mine from weeks ago and expired? You don't like pulp."

"Lisa likes pulp."

She smiled. "So I take it you two have been spending a lot of time together while I was gone, if you're stocking the fridge for her."

I sat down at the kitchen table. "Yeah. We have been. It's been pretty great, actually."

"The last time I saw you two together, at brunch the day after my wedding, I wasn't sure I'd come back to a happy couple, her not wanting kids and all."

Rosé took two glasses out of the cabinet and filled them with juice before going to where we kept the liquor and grabbing a bottle of vodka. She poured a shot into each glass and stuck her finger in to stir before sliding one across the table to me. "You can suffer through pulp for me."

I preferred no pulp, but I'd drink it if that was the only choice available. Though that wasn't the issue. I slid the glass back toward her. "You drink both. I'll drive."

"Neither of us is driving. Jae dropped me off on his way to the gym. He's going to come back when he's done and load the boxes into his car." She smiled. "He told me to enjoy my day with you, and he'd take care of the donations and go food shopping."

I shook my head. "I have no idea how you fooled that nice man into marrying you. But you done good, lady."

Since neither of us had to drive, why not indulge? I lifted the glass of orange juice and held it up to clink with my friend. "To good guys for a change."

Rosé downed half the glass and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. "So give me all the dirt. How did things go after brunch? I take it you convinced her having children was not the end of the world?"

I frowned. "Actually, I didn't. She hasn't changed her position. I'm not sure she ever will. And, honestly, she has reasons for not wanting children that I understand…well, mostly."

"So what happens if you two get serious? You just give up your dream of having a family?"

I shook my head. "I don't know. I'm not ready to make the decision to stop seeing her. But I'm also not ready to make the decision to not have a family. So I've decided to put off the decision—hoping something will happen organically."

Rosé's lips pressed together in a straight line. "I see only three things that could happen organically." She held up her hand and counted them off, first with her pointer. "One, you split up and there is no decision to make." She added her middle finger. "Two, she changes her mind." She raised her ring finger. "Three, you accept not having children." She shook her head. "You just said you don't think she'll ever change her mind. So that leaves splitting up or you accepting a very different life than you want. I don't think banking on splitting up is a healthy way to be in a relationship, and the last choice is an awfully big concession. Are you sure you would want that life?"

My shoulders slumped. Rosé was one hundred percent right, but avoidance was the only way to stay happy, and it had been a long time since I wanted someone in my life so badly.

I sighed. "I know burying my head in the sand is probably only going to make things worse in the future. But…I'm crazy about her, Rosé. I don't want to give her up."

Rosé stared at me for a long time and then abruptly stood. "January first."

"What about it?"

"That's the day you make the decision. It gives you a few months to enjoy the girl and give it thought. But January first, we'll sit down at this table and not get up until you've made a decision you can live with."

I forced a smile. "That's a good plan." Though, in my heart, I knew it was stupid. Chances were four more months would only make me fall harder for Lisa Manoban, especially the side of her she'd been showing me the last few weeks. But my head was pretty damn good at convincing my heart it was in control. So I went with the plan.

"Come on. No more talk about this subject," I told Rosé. "Let's go finish sorting your stuff so your hubby can drop the donations off. I want to throw some things in from my closet, too."

"Okay. What do you say we double-date tonight? Have dinner at that new Italian place downtown?"

"I'll text Lisa. She's working today, but she planned to come over later. I'm sure she'd be up for it."

I stood to get started, and Rosé reached out and squeezed my arm. "One more thing and then no more talking on the subject, I promise."

"Okay…"

"Take it slow. I know you care about her, but go slow. Don't give your heart so fully away that you won't be able to take it back."

I nodded. Except I was pretty sure I already had.

..

I hadn't laughed so hard in a long time. Rosé kept all of us amused with stories about the odd things that happened at her spa.

"Another woman came in and asked if her husband could watch her Brazilian wax. Aside from the fact that treatment rooms are small, we don't generally allow people to watch while we do procedures with someone's legs wide open on a table when they're naked. So I asked if he wanted to watch because he was interested in getting waxed himself and offered to do a sample strip on his back or leg. The woman, with a complete straight face, said he wanted to watch because he was a masochist, and it gets him aroused to see her in pain. Uh…no thanks. I think I'll pass on helping you get your husband's rocks off today."

Lisa was definitely the most shocked of the group. Not only was she not used to Rosé's dark humor, she had no idea what half the services she offered were for.

"The beauty of owning my own spa is that now I never have to see an ass that looks like a rainforest propped up on a waxing table again." Rosé looked at Lisa with a straight face and said. "Do you wax your balls or shave?"

Lisa looked like a deer caught in the headlights, which was amusing as hell since she rarely looked rattled. She actually started to answer her, and I had to let her off the hook.

"She's teasing you." Rosé and I laughed so hard tears streamed down my face.

The waiter came over to offer more wine, and everyone but Rosé declined because the rest of us were driving. Lisa had gotten stuck at the office late and met me at the restaurant, so we had two cars. One small glass of wine at the start of a two-hour dinner was my limit.

"So…" Rosé picked up her glass and brought it to her lips. She looked across at Lisa. "What would you think about going to Maui for the week between Christmas and New Year's? The four of us. I mean, not me and you—I'm a married woman now."

Lisa chuckled and looked at me. She reached for my hand under the table and squeezed it. "What do you think? A week in Hawaii?"

My heart raced. Making long-term plans warmed my heart. Lord knew giving most of my exes a dry cleaning ticket to pick up two days later would have freaked them out.

I smiled. "I'd love that."

After we got up from the table, the four of us stood around talking out front for another half hour. I overheard Jae invite Lisa to a baseball game, and Rosé winked at me with a huge grin. We never got to do things together as couples, and it felt so good to enjoy time with them together.

When it started to mist, it was time to finally go. I hugged Rosé and Jae goodbye, and Lisa walked me to my car. "It's late. You want to just leave your car here, and we can swing back tomorrow and pick it up?"

"No, I'm fine. I'm actually going to stop back at my apartment and pick up some work I need to do in the morning. I meant to bring it, but I forgot it on the kitchen table. So I'll just meet you at the boat."

"You feel like having wine? I'm out, but I can stop and pick it up on the way."

I pushed up on my toes and planted a soft kiss on her lips. "That sounds great. I'll see you in a little while."

"Be careful driving. It's getting foggy, and the mist will make the road slick."

"My aunt would love you. For all the years I lived with her, not an evening went by that she didn't warn me to drive carefully or tell me about the weather."

Lisa opened my car door and held onto the top before shutting it. "Go, smartass. I don't want you to get caught in dense fog. It rolls in fast down by the marina sometimes."

After I stopped home and got back on the road, it actually was getting pretty foggy. I'd teased Lisa for warning me to be careful, but it was becoming harder and harder to see. The roads leading down to the marina were winding, and I put on my high beams to get a better look up ahead. But after a few seconds, the headlights of an oncoming car flashed, so I turned my low beams back on. After the car passed, I hit the high beams again, but again an upcoming car approached, so I had to flick them back down. I gripped the steering wheel a little harder during the moments the low beams were on and relaxed when I could switch again. The fourth time an oncoming car passed, I was relieved to be able to return to my brights. But when I did, I was met with two big eyes.

Shit!

A huge deer with giant antlers stood in the middle of the damn road. He'd seemed to come out of nowhere. Suddenly there he was, only a hundred feet in front of me. We stared at each other, frozen in shock, until I thankfully jerked the steering wheel to the right.

Everything after that came in slow motion.

I missed the deer.

But the mist on the road made the blacktop slick, and I started to spin. I pulled the steering wheel in the other direction in an attempt to counter the motion, but it did no good.

My car went off the road and into the dirt.

I pushed all of my weight onto the brakes, and the car slid sideways down the side of the road.

With no lights shining anymore in the direction I was going, I got confused as to whether I was still on the side of the road or had gone back onto the pavement.

I held my breath as the car slowed.

Headlights from the other direction illuminated the street.

Thankfully, I wasn't on the road anymore.

But there was a tree up ahead.

I braced.

And everything became eerily quiet.

Until impact…

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