Kat sat in one of the chairs in the library, elbows propped up on her knees and face on her fists.

She knew she she was looking blankly at one of the floating books, but she wasn't really LOOKING-- more just pointing her eyes in that direction.

She hadn't really done much of the researching. There were a few books scattered around her feet, but she couldn't remember a single word in any of them.

Crowley, on the other hand, was really getting into it-- poring over a thick volume at a nearby table. He'd practically built a fort of books around himself, with only the lights in his mask's eyes visible below his hat.

How long had they been doing this-- twenty minutes? Half an hour?

She wasn't the best at judging the passage of time-- probably the ADHD talking-- but she was also exhausted.

None of these books made sense... Oh, she could READ them, or some of them, at least.

A lot of them were in different languages-- French, maybe? Italian? Some other European-ass languages... Even a surprising amount of what looked like some kind of Asian script. She couldn't really tell, but it looked like either Japanese or Chinese; it didn't look like there were enough circles to be Korean.

Either way, she couldn't read them.

The ones she COULD read weren't much better, either. All of the stuff was unfamiliar-- interspecies relations? The Treaty of the Valley of Thorns and the Timeless Forest? Sunset Savannah, Country of Sunshine, Queendom of Roses-- what was with these Dungeons and Dragons-ass names?

And none of these historical figures were familiar either. For one, a lot of them didn't have names, just descriptions or titles.

The Mermaid Princess, the Common-Born Prince, the Golden Emperor, the Dreamfinder...

Crowley snapped the book closed and sighed loudly.

Rubbing her eyes, Kat looked around, blinking muzzily at him.

"Just as I thought," he announced. "Nothing."

Great. She felt her stomach drop-- kind of impressive, since she didn't think it could drop any lower at this point.

Crowley continued.

"The name of your homeland is nowhere to be found on any map-- from any point in history, no less."

Standing up from the table, he walked over to her, hands folded behind his back.

"Miss Kat," he said sternly, glaring down at her. "Are you QUITE sure that you come from such a place? This-- this Washing-tonne? This wouldn't happen to be a lie, or some form of joke, would it?"

Kat gave him an exhausted and, frankly, disgusted look. "Why. The hell. Would I do that?" She asked flatly. "What would be the point?"

The Headmaster blinked, looking mildly surprised. "I- I see," he said, nodding. "Understood. Then, in that case..."

He tapped his chin thoughtfully.

"The only explanation for this current trouble is that you've come from another planet... Or possibly summoned here from some other realm or dimension."

Kat blinked. "Another..." She repeated slowly, then slapped herself in the forehead.

"Another DIMENSION. God DAMMIT-- I got ISEKAI'D! FUCK! This is a fucking Oz or Narnia situation, isn't it?! Dammit! Of COURSE it is!"

She noticed Crowley was still staring at her, mouth slightly open.

Coughing, she tossed some bangs out of her face, looking down awkwardly. "Sorry."

Shaking his head, Crowley cleared his throat. "N--No matter... AHEM! If you would be so kind-- could you show me everything that you brought with you?"

Kat gave him another blank look. "...Like what?"

"Anything that could serve as a form of identification-- a driver's license, perhaps? Maybe even a shoe? I must admit, you do seem a tad bit... Erm... Empty-handed, but..."

Kat looked down at herself. She'd gotten her clothes back, at least. When it became clear that this was going to take longer than expected, Crowley waved his walking stick, and the robes were replaced by her own outfit.

A pair of red skinny jeans, belted at the waist with a white belt- (Being cursed with ridiculous shoujo anime legs meant that her pants only fit around the waist and hips or her actual legs, never both--) And a Union Jack-printed black t-shirt. A zip-up pink hoodie and a pair of beat-up black and hot pink sneakers completed the 'look'.

She also had a necklace-- one of the bootleg Sailor Moon ones she ordered off Wish or Aliexpress. This one was Chibiusa's necklace with the Time-Space Key and Silver Crystal on it, from the manga.

"I mean-- I- I got... Y'know, these..."

She gestured vaguely at herself, then indicated her shoes. "I do have shoes, but it's not like they've got my name on 'em or anything... Um--"

She patted down her hoodie pockets, then her jeans-- letting out a small curse, she shook her head. "Dammit-- nope, I... Well, my wallet's too big for my pockets, but... Wh-- My PHONE'S gone, too! Fuck...!!"

"Hmmmm..."

Putting a hand on his hip, Crowley hummed. "Well, this IS troubling... As Headmaster, it wouldn't do to have a non-mage bumbling about the most prestigious magical academy in the world..."

A jolt of dread shot through Kat's body like an electric shock.

"But," he continued, looking down at the floor, evidently in deep thought, "I AM, after all, an educator, and expelling a young..."

He paused, blinking at her. "How old are you, may I ask?"

Kat shuffled awkwardly in the chair. "Nineteen," she muttered.

"Really?"

Crowley's luminous eyes widened.

"I wouldn't have guessed a day over seventeen... Are you still a high school student, then?"

"...No," she admitted, rubbing the back of her neck. "I-- I already graduated, um... I DID graduate on an alternate course-type thing, though... But- Uh-- I don't have a job or- or applied to colleges or anything, I still live at home... Look, it's a long story, okay?"

"Good heavens-- no need for any of that, you're still extremely young!" He exclaimed. "And because of that-- I am even more loath to expel you, especially in an unfamiliar world with nary a cent to your name or any way to contact your family... Because of how kind I am, of course!"

There it was again. Was that his catchphrase or something? Well-- he wasn't gonna kick her out, at least...

She sat awkwardly as he seemed to think.

"Hmmmmm... Ah!" He perked up, raising a finger.

"That's right-- there is a currently unoccupied building here on campus. It was, in fact, used as a dorm in the past-- with a bit of elbow grease, it should be habitable enough. Out of the profound kindness of my heart, I will allow you to live there for the time being..."

Extending a hand, he bowed slightly at the waist. "And in the meantime, with the full resources of this venerable institution at our disposal, we shall investigate other ways to send you home."

"S--Seriously?!"

Kat didn't even wait for him to help her up. She jumped out of the chair, squeezing the gloved hand... A little harder than she meant to, judging by the slight grimace that flashed across his face. "Oh my god, thank you so much-- seriously, thank you! I-- I- I'm really..."

"Oh-- there, there; i-it's quite alright, young lady." Crowley patted her gingerly on the shoulder with his other hand. "No need for that-- I am, after all, a most gracious man! Perhaps even a model educator, one might say."

Kat shook her head emphatically. "N--No- but, seriously, I... Thank you, I..."

She gave a weak, involuntary sniffle, dropping his hand to rub the heel of her palm hard against her eye.

God dammit-- honestly, it was impressive that she'd gone this long without crying yet, but she didn't really want to start NOW...

"S--Sorry... I-I'm okay..."

Crowley shook his hand for a bit, wincing, then gave her a warm smile. "It's quite alright... Well then-- I shall escort you to your dormitory straight away!"

Stepping around her, he started walking to the door. With a final quiet sniffle, Kat managed to force the tears back down for the time being, jogging slightly to catch up with him.

"It is a bit of an older building, but not to worry-- it makes up for that by having plenty of... Character, shall we say! Personally, I find it very charming!"

That statement set off some warning bells in her mind. She felt like she should listen to them, but she was honestly too tired and overwhelmed to think much at the moment.

Chattering away, Crowley walked back down the hall and out into the courtyard once again.

All I've done so far is follow this guy around...

Well, it's not like it's anything new; this is pretty much my standard new-school experience.

Except for the fact that I'm not actually going to school here.

And almost getting killed by a demon cat.

Zipping up her hoodie against the cold night air, she hurried at the Headmaster's heels, feeling like a lost puppy or something.

Author's Notes:

Yeah, a lot of the early prologue is just MC following Crowley around and getting expositioned at.

Also at this point I/Kat think(s) he's actually pretty cool, but my respect for him is only gonna take a steep nosedive from here on out. Does he deserve it?

...Yes. Yes, he does.

Also, the Common-Born Prince is Aladdin, the Golden Emperor is Kuzco, and if you know who the Dreamfinder is I'll love you forever. Viva la imagination.