Rain pounded down on the roof of the house. Warped and misaligned beams allowed a few drops to find their way inside; a fact Legend was becoming intimately aware of.
"Why do you have such a crappy roof?" he groused, tugging his blue hat down further. The water pattered down his face regardless.
Blue snorted, "I'm a blacksmith, not a carpenter."
Green looked abashed, "Budget's been tight."
"I never sit there," Vio remarked.
"We could trade seats?" Red offered.
The veteran Hero eyed the Four splits warily, "Not sure if I'll ever get used to that."
"Then it's a good thing you don't have to," Blue snarked.
"Blue!" was the quick recrimination from Red.
"It's the truth though," Hyrule acknowledged, idly drawing shapes on the table.
Time grunted in general aggrieved agreement.
Everyone sat in melancholic silence, heads down and eyes averted. Red sniffled, looking to be on the verge of tears.
"Way to go Blue, you made Red cry. Again," Vio drolled.
"Oh shut your face, he does that all the time. 'sides, if I didn't say it, you would've."
Vio considered this point before shrugging and nodding.
Another drop splashed on Legend's face, who growled at the sky. Thunder growled back.
"How about a game?" offered Green.
"-and then he said… he said: 'It was never really an occasion!'" Green wheezed with laughter before placing a card down.
"Aye, I remember that," Time smiled, leaning back in his chair after making his own move, "Poor lad was shakin' like a leaf when you were done with him."
Red frowned down at his two remaining cards, "We were too harsh."
Blue angrily grabbed at the pool, adding to his already full hand, "We were never harsh enough."
"Aww come on, it wasn't the Champion's fault that he was… you know," Hyrule tapped the side of his head. The others responded in kind knowingly.
An irate Hero snapped his book shut.
"Okay, that tears it! Purah, I need a time machine!"
"What, to prevent the Calamity? Linky, don't you think I've-"
"No, not that. I think my past selves are talking about me behind my back!"
"...Hey Princess? Are we sure the Shrine of Resurrection didn't cause any other… whoopsies?"
"Feh, you guys suck at this game. If I were playing, I'd have won by now," Legend tsked, leaning against a wall and out of the splash zone.
"Because you cheat. A lot," Vio pointed out before laying down his last card, "I win, by the way. Again."
"Nah-ah, no one's ever proven that," the veteran pointed an accusing finger at the purple clad Hero.
Everyone watched as a card fell out of his sleeve.
"That could've been anyone's," Legend hastily folded his arms.
Several more fell out the bottom of his tunic.
"I've been framed, clearly."
Time shuffled his cards with a secretive smirk.
"Whatever. Next match. Vio, you're out," Blue began mixing the pile of cards.
"Fair enough," Vio shrugged.
"So, uh, Smithy? Can I still call you that?" Hyrule wondered.
The Four nodded in eerie unison.
"Creepy. Anyway, got any plans moving forward?"
"Well, things should be pretty normal around here. I still have plenty of doppelgangers to keep me company, so it shouldn't be too jarring," Green mused.
"Speaking of Doppelgangers-" Blue started.
"Don't," Vio warned.
"Don't what?" Blue challenged.
Vio's mouth drew into a grimace.
"Should we not tell them, Vio?" Blue pressed.
"Guys?" Red looked between the two.
"Tell us what?" Legend asked.
Time crossed his arms, "It's disappointing to see all of these secrets come out only now at the end. I thought we were past this."
Hyrule leaned forward in anticipation, concern and curiosity written across his face.
Red looked at Green. Green looked at Blue. Blue never tore his gaze from Vio, who was staring at the table intently.
The only sound was the rain hitting the roof and rattling the glass windows.
Vio inhaled, then exhaled softly.
"It was our shadow."
The other Heroes stared at him while the various colours looked down.
"On our adventures; we came across that shadowy aspect of ourselves. We thought that he was gone, but somehow-"
"Somehow he returned, and caused all of this mess," Green finished sourly.
"Sorry," murmured Red.
"I, uh, hate to burst your pity bubble here," interjected Legend, "but I'm pretty sure that was my shadow."
"Huh?" said the Four.
"No, no… Guys, it was my shadow," Hyrule looked terribly confused, "Wasn't it?"
"What?" said the Four.
Time threw back his head and laughed.
"What's so funny, big guy? You gonna suggest that the four foot tall demon with an attitude was actually your shadow too?" Blue snarked.
Time stopped laughing to wipe a tear away.
"Yes, actually I was. Looks like we all saw only what we expected to see."
"But how would that even work? Spatially, I mean," Vio looked to be doing some calculations in his head, "If we're all different heights and use different weapons, how could he, it, have fought different combinations of us at once? Did all the others have counterparts too? What would they see if they didn't? What even was it?"
"Nayru quick! The reality's collapsing again!"
"I swear Farore this is the last time we go along with one of your hare-brained schemes."
"But it was fun . Din, tell her how much fun it was."
"I hate you."
"See? That's more than she's said to me in millenia!"
"Why am I stuck with you two? All the other deities at least have a proper pantheon; I can't even keep track of any of our underlings anymore!"
"Hylia's still around, isn't she?"
"Debatable. Din, have you heard from Hylia recently?"
"I hate you too."
"Oh hey she is in a good mood."
"Told ya."
"..."
"..."
"Wanna make a new timeline?"
"I thought you'd never ask."
"I get the sudden feeling we should drop this subject," Green felt a cold sensation run down his spine.
"Me too," everyone echoed identically. They looked at each other concernedly.
"Right… How about some drinks? Vet, there should be-"
"Pft, I got this. Got a sixth sense for loot by now. Now, let's see here…"
Legend crept around the kitchen area as if hunting an animal before stopping in front of a particular cupboard. Reaching deep behind various foodstuffs, the veteran's face lit up, "Ah-ha! Keep the good stuff in the back I see."
He brought the fancy looking bottle back to the table and poured himself a generous helping.
Vio raised an unimpressed brow, "Did you have to knock half of our dining ware to the ground for that?"
Blue snorted, "Did you have to get such a big cup?"
Red pouted, "Aren't you gonna share?"
Green frowned, "I didn't know we had that."
Legend blinked, "Nope, that's still weird."
"Vet!" Hyrule scolded.
"I'm kidding, I'm kidding. We all have our own quirks. Trust me, I know."
The group poured out cups and drank from the bottle in companionable silence for a while.
"You think the portal's thirsty?" Red asked.
"What portal-? Gah!" Blue picked up the bottle and chucked it into the vortex which had soundlessly coagulated beside him.
"No! My booze!" Red stretched an arm outward dramatically.
"That was vintage," Vio sniffed.
"I still don't get how or why you all got that behind my back," Green rested his head in his hands.
The normally silent gateway emanated what could best be described as a belch.
"...Did it just…?" Blue recoiled in shock.
"Yes," Green looked just as shocked.
"Is it…?" Red pantomimed a drunken sway.
"Most likely," Vio deduced.
"Well, good luck guys!" They said together.
"Woah, hey, why do we have to go through the drunk portal?" Legend objected.
"...Because we live here," Green raised an eyebrow.
"...And you don't," Blue grunted.
"...And there's a decent chance it'd turn whoever goes through it inside out," Vio stated matter-of-factly.
"...And… uh… I don't actually have anything to add this time. Good luck guys! Again," Red chimed in.
The portal vibrated in such a way that was reminiscent of a snort or a giggle.
Legend considered the situation, his luck, and his life in general thus far.
"I've done stupider things. Goodbye shortstacks; I appreciated your relative sanity, which now that I mention it, really says a lot about the rest of us."
He walked through, the gateway resonating with what sounded like a hiccup.
Time drummed his fingers on the table.
"Four foot tall demon with an attitude… now if that ain't the half of it," he mused before downing his remaining drink, "I'm off to do some damage control. Take your time kid."
The old man stood up and laboriously stretched, giving Green a firm clap on the shoulder, the rest a nod, then following after the veteran Hero.
Hyrule hesitantly rose from his chair.
"What's the matter, Traveller?" Green nudged.
"I have this awful feeling in my gut. I don't want to finish this," Hyrule looked between the gateway and the Four, stricken.
"You're not finishing anything," Vio gently chided.
"It's already over," Blue groused.
"Somehow that doesn't reassure me," the traveller sighed.
"I'm not sure anything can," Blue shrugged.
"Besides getting it over with," Green encouraged.
"You'll be fine. We all will be," Red smiled brightly.
Hyrule scuffed the floor with his boot.
"Yeah. I guess so."
He looked back one more time.
The Four gave a combination of waves and thumbs up.
Then, he too was gone.
"...Now what?"
"I dunno, what do you wanna do?" three identical voices responded simultaneously.
The Links looked at each other.
"This isn't much fun when I'm the only captive audience," one sighed.
Suddenly, a knock on the door.
"Link? I think my past self has a message for you? Or someone who looks just like you, only, like, taller. Not that that narrows it down, really, uh, no offence?"
The Heroes of the Four Sword were once again united under one vision.
"Mess with Zelda?"
"Mess with Zelda."