There are certain things one should never get used to. Death used to be one of those things, at least in my view. Apparently, there was another one in the list, and it was no longer being surprised whenever I woke up after an incident I was convinced was going to kill me.
Another one would be getting used to the groggy feeling of waking up in a drugged daze after what was probably some major surgery.
I tried to say a simple hello, but all I got out was a mumble. Or so I thought. Despite the fact that I was getting used to it, it didn't make it any less pleasant. I tried to look around, but the room was dark. Very dark. There was something stuck down my throat, and it hurt when I tried to swallow.
"Whuh…" I muttered. I reached up to my mouth, and fund there was a tube there. "Dumm…"
There was a beeping sound when I pulled at the tube, and a few seconds later the lights came on and someone rushed into the room. He grabbed my arm and pulled it away.
"Easy there," she said. So it was a woman. Whatever. "Take it easy."
"I cugh…"
"Don't speak. Let me take this out for you."
Having a tube down your throat is not a pleasant feeling. Having it removed is even less so. I gagged as the tube was pulled, and started coughing the second it was out. The doctor held me down until the coughing subsided somehow, then put a straw in my mouth. I took a few grateful gulps of water, but I found it difficult to swallow.
"Take it easy, you've been intubated for three days," the doctor said.
"We've got to stop meeting like this, doc," I muttered.
"Oh? Have we met?" the doctor replied.
I blinked repeatedly, trying to get my eyes into focus. The doctor was already running a scanner over me, not paying much attention to my musings.
"You aren't Chakwas," I said.
"Good, your observation skills seem undamaged," the doctor replied. In the low light all I could see was a thin woman with dark hair held in a bun. "I'm doctor Miller."
"Where…"
"You're in the hospital."
"Yah. Which one?"
"The Yuri Gagarin, assigned to the Fifth Fleet," the doctor replied.
"Oh. Ship. How did I…"
"You were brought here from the Citadel Tower, along with Commander Shepard and her team."
"Shepard," I muttered. Hell yeah, she actually did make it. I thought I had imagined it. "She okay?"
"They have all been treated, you were the worst one of the lot. I have to say, she does keep exotic company, we haven't treated that many aliens at the same time in quite a while."
Great, so they all made it. We made it.
We saved the freaking galaxy.
I would have laughed if it didn't hurt so much, as it was all I could do was chuckle a bit, then groan.
"I wouldn't try to laugh too much. You had seven broken ribs."
"Ugh. What else?"
"Collapsed lung, broken leg, triple fracture of your left arm, third degree burns over twenty percent of your torso, a punctured liver, and a laundry list of bruises and contusions."
"Hell of a party…" I muttered.
"I'd say. You're lucky to be alive."
"That's me," I replied.
"Well, you're progressing nicely, but don't overdo it yet. You're going to need a few more days of bedrest."
"Thanks doc," I replied. I grunted as I raised my left arm, only to find out my omni-tool wasn't there. "Where's my omni-tool?"
The doctor took a quick look around and shrugged. "Not here, probably in storage."
"Doc, I need to make a call," I said. "I need to find it."
"Relax, whatever it is it can wait. You're in no con- Hey!"
She pushed me down onto the bed when I tried to stand, which I have to admit, hurt like a bitch, and made the room spin around me.
"I have to call Mika," I said. "I have to-"
"You're not going anywhere."
"But-"
"Anywhere," she insisted. "Let me go and find out, you stay here and rest. And don't do anything stupid or I will tie you down."
"… what's with the Alliance doctors and the bondage gear?" I said.
Without missing a beat, the doctor smiled. "We deal with a lot of unruly marines. Now sit tight."
I nodded at her with a muttered thanks, and watched her leave. Damn. Damn, damn, damn. I was wide awake now. Saren, Shepard, it had all gone down the way it was supposed to. Took me a while, but it did. So the only important thought in my head was Mika. She could have been trapped down there for three freaking days while nobody was looking for her. Damn!
The door opened while I was trying to painfully prop myself up. I grunted in pain, and the newcomer rushed to my help.
"Woah there, let me help."
"Shepard?"
"The one and only!" she replied cheerfully. She helped me sit up, and hit the controls of the bed, making it lift on the back. "Heard the doc say you were awake. How are you feeling?"
"Like fried shit," I grunted. "I guess you saved my ass?"
"And such a nice ass it is!" Shepard said.
"Six out of ten," I replied.
"Last time I saw it!" Shepard said between chuckles. "You've been working out! But you can thank Garrus this time," she addded.
She put another pillow behind me, and sat back, a beaming smile on her face. Damn, she didn't look so good herself. A couple of fading bruises on her face, bags under her eyes, and she had a slight limp when she moved.
"I bet he loved that," I muttered.
"He'll get over it," Shepard said. "Besides, it'd have been bad form if he had let a recipient of the Star of Tazar die."
"A… what?"
I looked at her in puzzlement, which made her laugh in response.
"Ah Roy, it never gets old," she said, and grinned. "It's only the highest non-military honor the Council can bestow."
She offered me a small box, and I opened it to find a medal inside. It wasn't particularly big. It showed an eight-point starburst in gold, with a couple of small dots on either side, green and blue. I just looked at it, and then at Shepard.
And she laughed again.
"Really? That's all you give me?"
"I'm… confused," I said. And I was.
"I had to receive it in your absence. The Council wanted to make a big show right after the battle to get things to normal," she said, her tone mocking when she repeated the quote. "There was a ceremony for the brave souls who fought and died, and to pin a lot of medals on a lot of people. I told them to just wait a few days and give it to you personally, but you know how politicians are."
"But why are they giving me a medal?"
"Why are- Are you serious?" Shepard said. "You held the Council chamber for two hours by yourself to stop Saren from opening the Citadel Relay, in the middle of a geth invasion, which is probably the main reason we're still here, and you're asking me why?"
"Err…"
"And of course you knew we had to keep the chamber safe to avoid having Saren use it for the reaper to call in the rest of the fleet."
"I…"
"You know what? Never mind that." She pointed at the box. "It's a compliment. Just once, take it at face value."
"O… kay," I said.
She nodded at me and sat back again, a satisfied air about her.
"Did you get one too?" I said, looking at the shiny edges of the medal. I still hadn't finished processing it, it was so unexpected.
"Haha! No, of course not. I got a plaque and they made me a Spectre. My reward is more work," Shepard replied, her smile widening. "You know, Ash would have been proud of you. When we jumped in with the Mako I was expecting to find a whole army of geth waiting for us. All we found was one- Roy?"
"Ash. Would have… what happened to her?"
No. No it couldn't be. I saw Shepard's amused grin disappear as a shadow fell over her. Shit. No way. She had all the warning she needed, it couldn't be Virmire. It couldn't.
"Yes, of course. You don't know," she said, her voice low. "A team of STG discovered Saren's base of operations on the planet Virmire. We went there to investigate, not knowing what we would find."
I didn't say a word. I couldn't even think of anything to say. It wasn't supposed to happen.
"We completed the mission, but we lost people. Williams, Alenko, Grieco, Felawa. And the STG team too."
"No," I muttered. "Can't be. Why…"
"I have been thinking about that ever since," Shepard replied. "If I had taken some more time to review the STG mission, I might have taken reinforcements. If only I had investigated more thoroughly."
"But… You had… Didn't you know?"
"No. All we had was a garbled transmission from STG, sent on a mission critical channel. I knew they were investigating Saren, so we moved in."
All of them. Goddamn fucking hell, all of them. They were all dead. I sent-
I didn't.
The FUCKING Shadow Broker!
That fat jawed, ugly son of a bitch. We had made a deal, and he had done nothing. All he had to do was pass a fucking message! Of course, if I had been the one to deliver the message, there wouldn't have been any chances of this shit happening.
"I should have told you earlier," Shepard said. "I'm sorry."
"It's not your fault," I replied, my voice low and dry.
"What, are you going to tell me it's your fault?" Shepard said.
"No. Definitely not."
No, it was the fault of a massive scumbag who had signed his death warrant the second he backstabbed me. I knew where to find him. And if there was something he had, it was enemies. He was going to pay, if it was the last thing I did.
We spent a few minutes in silence, until the door opened and the doctor walked in.
"Oh, hello Commander. You're not upsetting my patient, are you?"
"Of course not! I wouldn't dream of it," Shepard chirped happily.
"Good. Here, I found it in storage. I believe this is your omni-tool?"
"Yes!" I replied, snatching it off her hands and opening the interface without even waiting to wear it.
"It's a bit odd, I've never seen an attachment like that," the doctor said.
"It's custom," I replied absently. "Come on, come on!"
"Morgan-Messenger," Gee called.
"Gee! Dude I'm glad to hear you, but I need to find Mika, she's not answering."
"Acknowledged, attempting to access communications grid."
"Roy?" Shepard said. "What's going on?"
"It's Mika. She was trapped in the sewers when the attack came. Come on! Pick up the phone dammit!"
"We are unable to establish a connection to communications grid," Gee said.
"The grid's been hammered since the geth attack," Shepard said.
"Goddammit, I have to-"
"Woah there!"
I tried to get out of bed, only to be stopped by both Shepard and the doctor.
"Let go! I have to find her!"
"You!" Shepard snapped. She pushed me down hard and pinned me. "You are in no condition to go anywhere."
"Shepard! I have-"
"I'll find her," she said. She looked at me straight in the eye. "I'm a Spectre now, remember? I've got this. Where is she?"
She was serious. Damn! I wanted to go out and find her, but I didn't think Shepard – or the doctor, for the matter – would let me. After a moment, I nodded and brought the omni-tool back up.
"Here," I said, after bringing the map up with a bit of fiddling. "She was down the main junction on Green 29. The doors through the sewers all closed down, she could be trapped in there! That's her omnitool frequency, if she's close you can use the comms of the sewer systems, she-"
"Got it," Shepard interrupted me. She stood up and leaned forward, her face inches away from mine. "I'll find her."
With that, she left the room at a good pace, already putting a call through her omni-tool. And I was left behind to try and re-try getting through to Mika, and getting nothing in return.
She was as safe as anyone could be in the Citadel. She would be fine.
It had been a very long day. As Roy had said, the entire sewer network had been sealed, with emergency mechanical bulkheads closing on every junction. It had taken several teams of heavies to cut through, and even more to remove the rubble and debris.
All the while, Roy had been messaging her non-stop. She could understand it, she really could. However, she hadn't replied in the last two hours. She'd promised she'd update him as soon as she knew one way or another.
Now, she was standing in front of the door to his hospital room, trying to decide how to proceed. She looked down at the folded gun in her hand and sighed. She had removed the ammo block, just in case.
Time to face the music.
She hit the release and walked in. The lights inside the room were dim, and Roy seemed to be sleeping. However, the second her steps made the first noise, he bolted upright.
"Shepard! What the hell, I've been trying to call you! What…"
His voice trailed off, while his eyes stayed fixed on her. Damn. She should have schooled her face better. She kept walking, and sat on the chair by the bed.
"Roy," she said.
"What happened?"
"We found the junction where Mika was trapped. Unfortunately, a piece of the reaper had crashed on that part of the Citadel after it was destroyed. The whole chamber had collapsed."
"She's…"
He couldn't finish saying it, but he didn't need to. She was dead.
"I'm sorry Roy. She had this with her," she said.
She offered the gun to Roy. She was pretty sure it was his, she recognized the markings from the SR-1 Williams had put on all their gear. It also had a small bauble attached to the bottom of the grip with a string. It was a round glass bead with a pair of what looked like little wings.
"She had this with her," Shepard repeated. Damn, she felt so stupid. "It's yours, isn't it?"
He still didn't answer. He took the gun by the barrel, looked at it for a few seconds, then dropped it on his lap when his hands started trembling. He grabbed his hair with both hands, curling forward and let out a scream.
"Roy!"
Shepard tried to grab his hands before he could tear his hair out. He didn't recoil, or react in any way, just kept screaming. Not knowing what else to do, she put her arms around his head, and pressed him against his chest. He resisted at first, but the resistance was short lived. Instead of screaming, he started crying.
It wasn't fair. She was used to losing people, maybe too used to it. He wasn't. And in the same day that she had hit him with the news, she had found the quarian he seemed to care about so much was dead.
By the by he seemed to calm down. Which then led to him pulling away, seemingly embarrassed about his outburst.
"Goddammit," he muttered, furiously wiping his face with his sleeve.
"It's fine. Don't worry about it," Shepard said.
He picked up the pistol again, and examined the bauble hanging from the grip. "She was supposed to be safe down there," he said, his voice hoarse. "That place… It's a bunker. Why…"
"I know," Shepard said. "It was. I don't think anything other than that massive crash would have made it through. It was just bad luck, Roy."
He nodded absently, twirling the gun in his hands. In truth, Shepard didn't know what to say. She was used to marines and their families. It was easy to talk about how they did their duty, or trade stories of the things they did together in the past. Somehow, reminding Roy that he had probably saved the galaxy wouldn't do any good. Neither would asking him about how he knew to get up there. Or how he had managed to keep the geth at bay for so long. That was a story she wanted to hear, but it really, really wasn't the time for it.
"It won't be any consolation, but we also found your former boss down there, and she's alive. Shala. It looks like she was trying to get to Mika."
"She…" Roy chuckled at that, but there was no humor in it. "She did. Figures."
"Figures?"
"She had Mika on an indentured servitude contract," Roy said. "She didn't want to give her up, and Mika didn't seem to mind. I think she liked her."
"Mika liked her, or Shala did?"
"Yes," Roy replied, and got a small chuckle out of Shepard.
"She seemed nice. I only met her during that hoopla when Saren tried to kidnap you, remember that?"
"Like I could forget that…"
"Yeah," Shepard said, undeterred by the answer. "You should have seen her chew Garrus out. She looked so meek, then suddenly, bam!"
Roy nodded, but didn't answer. He kept his eyes fixed on the pistol, which made Shepard think she was glad she had removed the ammo block. Not that she expected anything crazy, but just in case.
"So, Shala's here in the ship, if you want to drop by. She was in bad shape, but the doctor says she'll recover."
"Maybe later," Roy said.
"Yeah," Shepard replied. She reached out and grabbed his arm, giving it a squeeze. "I'm really sorry, Roy."
"Thanks," he replied.
Hey Tali,
I need a little favour. Do you think you could find me some information about the Iaera? It's the ship Mika was going to go back to after her pilgrimage.
Thanks,
Roy.-
The doctors had me stay in the hospital for another day, which was all kinds of annoying. She actually wanted to keep me for three or four, but I managed to negotiate it down to one. I wasn't feeling great, but I just couldn't stay in place. On the one hand, I would have liked nothing better than to sit alone in the room forever. On the other, and more important hand, there was something I really, really needed to do.
"Roy!"
I opened the door to my room to find Tali on the other side, hand on the control as if she was about to open. She jumped the moment the door opened, but I didn't even react. In truth, I was probably shambling along like a zombie more than walking.
"Hey Tali," I said.
"You surprised me! How are you? Shepard said you were still recovering," Tali said, looking me up and down.
"I'm fine, good enough to walk."
"That's great! So are you leaving? Let's go!"
"Yeah, just one stop first."
The hospital ship was quite large, and it took us a few minutes to find the right room. Shala had been taken to the intensive care ward at first, but had been released a few hours ago. Or so the VI claimed. We made it down two levels, and I stopped in front of the room, looking at the door.
"Do you want me to wait outside?" Tali said.
"Wait… Yes, it'll be just a minute."
"Okay."
I hit the door chime, and after a moment, the door opened. An asari was on the other side, and she seemed rather confused by my presence.
"Yes?"
"I'm here to see Shala," I said.
"And you are…?"
"Roy Morgan. I used to work for her."
"Oh." She hesitated, but finally took a step back and let me inside. "She's still unconscious."
"I see," I said. I went inside, and closed the door behind me. "How is she doing?"
"She's out of danger," she said. "I'm Pailla," she added, offering her hand.
"Are you a friend?" I said, shaking it.
"Her daughter," she replied, smiling at the notion.
"Oh."
Well, that's embarrassing.
I walked closer to Shala, and took a good look. Bruises, a black eye – or, rather, purple – all sorts of bandages and casts holding half her body in place. She really was in bad shape. The medical monitor was beeping regularly, following her heartbeat.
"Who's that?" a female voice called behind me.
"Huh?"
I turned around, and saw another asari. She had pulled the privacy curtain around her bed aside, and was looking at me with curiosity.
"Do I know you?" she said.
"I… I don't know, I've seen you before?" I said. She did look familiar.
"I'm… My name is Inet," she said, narrowing her eyes. "Why are you here?"
"I didn't mean to-"
"He works for father," Pailla said. When I looked at her, she smiled again. "She's my sister."
"Oh. Not the best place for a family reunion," I said.
Inet laughed softly, then coughed painfully after she did. Pailla rushed to her side, but her sister just waved her down. She reached for the side table, where a drinking bottle was resting, and I saw she had a whole lot of cables and a couple of tubes coming out of her chest.
"What happened?" I said.
"Hm? Oh, this?" she said, pointing at her chest. "Got shot through the chest during the attack."
"Damn. Lucky," I replied.
She nodded, sipping the water slowly and grimacing every time she swallowed. "They found me in the sewer entrance, someone had patched me up and left me there."
…
And that was when recognition struck. I looked at her dumbfounded, finally recognizing her face. The asari I had patched up on my way to the tower. I opened my mouth, then closed it again before I said another word. Would she be pissed at me for leaving her there?
Probably.
Look at what happened when I left Mika…
"Something wrong?" Inet said, tilting her head slightly and looking at me.
"Oh, no, no. Nothing. I… I should go."
"Want me to tell father you came?" Pailla said.
"Yeah. And tell her I said thank you, for trying to save Mika."
"Of course," Pailla replied, although she didn't look like she knew what I was talking about.
I nodded at them and made for the door, before Inet recognized me. I really wasn't in the mood to have a whole conversation about why, exactly, I had left her on her own when she was dying during a geth attack.
"All done?"
"Huh? Oh, yes, yes. Let's go."
Tali fell into step behind me, and we took the lift down to the shuttle bay. It was several levels down, so it took quite a while for us to get there.
"Roy?" Tali said.
"Yea?"
"Are you feeling all right? You don't look so good."
"I'm…" I shook my head. "Sorry, I'm not very good company now."
"I'm sorry about Mika," she finally said. "I've been looking into the ship you asked me about. It's… not too good."
"Not good?"
"No. It's a very old cargo ship, an Atlas class." She looked at me, and I must have had a blank expression on my face because I had no idea what she was on about. "They were made before the Systems Alliance got eezo, then they got retrofitted. They're great at hauling cargo, but there are a lot of crappy ships out there with bad upgrades."
"So it's a small ship, or…"
"No, it's huge! Three hundred crew. It's just… When quarians come back from their pilgrimage, we bring back gifts to the fleet. To help the fleet, and to prove they can earn their keep."
"I know," I said.
"Yes. Sometimes the gifts are too small, so the only captains who take them are those who are… who need the most help. Either because their crew isn't proficient enough, or their ship is falling apart. It's not like they're desperate, but… you know. So they get more and more crew, on ships that are worse and worse."
"That's what happened to the Iaera?"
"In a way," Tali said, and she looked uncomfortable discussing it. "It wasn't the captain's fault. The ship was just not too good to begin with."
I had a feeling Tali was trying to be delicate about the whole thing. Like the Iaera was the equivalent of a shanty in the quarian fleet. In a way, it didn't surprise me, given Mika's circumstances. It did made the knot I had been carrying in my stomach twist a little tighter.
"And the fleet just lets this happen?" I said. It sounded a lot more bitter than I had intended.
"It's not that easy. The only way the fleet can exist is if we all take care of our own ships. If things get too bad, the Conclave intervenes, but that means the captain loses the ship, and the crew might get reassigned. Nobody likes to lose their home."
I saw what she meant, but it still annoyed me. We arrived at the bay after a few long and silent minutes, and boarded the next shuttle down towards the Citadel. While we sat there waiting, I took the time to type a message for Gee.
Gee, buddy. Do me a favour please. See if you can find me some good parts for an Atlas class ship that I can afford.
"How are you, Tali? Any bumps or bruises?"
"Not at all, I was lucky! Wrex lost an arm during the fight, and it didn't seem to bother him at all!"
"An.. arm?"
"Yes! He says it'll grow back. I'm kind of jealous, I can't get a scratch on my suit without risking an infection, and he can just lose an arm and still go around like nothing happened."
"You like Wrex, don't you?" I said, forcing a smile out.
"Of course! He's taught me a lot about guns, and he looks all mean but he's a big softie."
"Sure he is," I said, suppressing a snigger. "Just a big fluffy teddy bear."
"Really big, I can hide behind him whenever I need to."
Conversation dropped for a while, and we just watched people board the shuttle as we waited. When the shuttle finally took off, Tali turned around and looked at me straight in the eye.
"By the way, I'm mad at you, even if I haven't said so."
"Me?"
"Yeah, you. Every time we find you, you're always getting yourself in trouble. You have to be more careful."
"I'll keep that in mind," I deadpanned.
"I'm serious! You could have told us, Shepard would have helped you. I would have helped you." She pointed her finger at my face and stopped me from replying. "And no arguing back. I was there with Garrus when we found you, and I was sure you were going to die. You are not allowed to do that to me again."
For a moment, I was reminded of Mika. She had given me more than one lecture when something bothered her. But those lectures were always wrapped in a very caring shell. And the eyes behind the mask…
"Okay," I muttered, trying to speak past the lump in my throat. What I wouldn't give for another lecture from Mika right about now.
That must have caught Tali by surprise, because she didn't say anything. After the silence became uncomfortable once again, she started talking about their trip to Ilos, and all the weird stuff they had seen there. I was pretty sure all that was supposed to be wrapped in Spectre "classified" tape, but it didn't seem to bother her. I probably knew more about Ilos than she did, specially since it seemed like they went in and out in a real hurry, but I didn't say anything. It was nice to hear her talking about Ilos with such wonder in her voice.
First time anyone had seen a prothean. Or so she thought. The statues on Ilos were actually the Inusannon, the civilization that came before the protheans, but nobody knew that, either. Damn. I realized I was pretty much volunteering myself to keep quiet about what I knew without the AI having to remind me to keep quiet.
Speaking of the AI, I hadn't heard a word from her.
The shuttle dropped us on a temporary dock the Alliance had set up on the third arm of the Citadel. The main docks had been badly damaged, and the remaining ones were having to deal with very heavy traffic. After disembarking, I went straight for the rapid transit terminal, and Tali followed without asking a single question.
"I hate these things," I said, strapping myself to the shuttle as tightly as I could.
"Shepard seems to like them," Tali replied, doing the same. "The do not bother me, at least they are fast."
"AVINA, take us to the C-Sec academy please."
Without another word, the shuttle's doors closed, and the infernal contraption took off at full tilt towards the sky. I close my eyes and kept my hands on the straps, holding as tightly as I could. And while I was sitting there with my butt clenched and my eyes closed, Tali was just making casual conversation.
"Why are we going to C-Sec?" she said.
"They have my stuff," I replied, still with my eyes closed.
"Oh. Did you break the law or something? I know C-Sec can be a bit too aggressive, specially with quarians, but I didn't think they'd bother you. So did you do something?"
"No," was all I said.
"Are you all right Roy?"
"I'm fine! I hate this thing!"
"It's not so-" Tali's reply was interrupted when the shuttle banked hard down. I felt my stomach try to get to my throat, and hand to swallow it down. "Not so bad."
After a mercifully short run, the rapid transit shuttle dropped us at the C-Sec academy. I stumbled out of the vehicle taking big mouthfuls of air, trying to keep my rather small and unappetizing lunch inside myself (consisting of, what else, hard bar rations; I bet Shepard had something to do with that, just her way to try and cheer me up). Tali disembarked gingerly and waited for me to get my bearings back. Nobody really paid much attention to me, since that kind of reaction was rather common with the rapid transit system.
When I finally righted myself, I looked at Tali, and couldn't help the chuckle that escaped me. Given how her eyes had narrowed, she was smiling and quite amused.
"Come on, let's get my shit back," I said.
"Your…"
"My gear."
The place was busy, but it wasn't particularly chaotic. We made for the front desk, where a couple of humans were dealing with the queues. For the snatches of conversations I could hear, most were there to find missing people. Lots of holos with pictures and videos were being passed around. It really shouldn't have surprised me, but it made the losses from the battle that much more real.
"So many people…" Tali said. "It's so sad."
"I know," I replied.
"I wonder how many people will find… Oh. Sorry, I didn't mean-"
"It's fine," I said. "It makes me wonder. When I told Shepard where Mika was, she didn't even take a day to dig her out. Meanwhile…"
I made a discrete gesture around, which Tali followed with her eyes. She nodded, but didn't answer. I supposed Shepard had pulled Spectre rank to get help with Mika. Meanwhile, who knew how many people were still searching.
"Can I help you?"
"Huh?"
I looked up and saw that the queue had cleared up in front of us. I didn't even realize. I tried to put it out of my mind, and looked at the man behind the counter. Overweight, balding, and with a slightly greasy looking skin. He looked rather tired.
"Yes," I said. "My name"s Roy Morgan. You took some of my gear five days ago, right before the attack. I would like it back."
"Morgan," he muttered, working his terminal.
The camera on top of it flashed once, probably for facial recognition, and he kept working. For a moment, I thought he was going to say something, but he seemed to change his mind and kept typing. It seemed to drag on forever.
"Sir," a voice to my right called. I turned to see two C-Sec standing there, trying to look imposing. Two turians. "Step this way please."
I turned to the man behind the counter. "Is there a problem?" I said, my voice flat.
"There won't be a problem if you step aside," he replied.
With a side glance, I checked the guards on my right. They hadn't moved from their spot, but I was sure they were getting ready to unholster their guns. I gave a look to the other side, and saw that two more had moved closer.
To be completely honest, I was past caring. I really wasn't in the mood for that shit, and I'm pretty sure Tali noticed too, since she stepped right besides me and put her hand on my arm.
"It's fine, I'll call Shepard. She can come and clear whatever it is up."
I looked at her, and weighted my options. For some reason, I really wanted to start some shit right there and then. It was a completely irrational thought, and I realized it, but it was so tempting. Didn't want Tali caught in it, tho.
"Fine," I said.
Tali stepped aside, and I walked to the end of the counter. I looked at the two C-Sec, crossed my arms, and leaned back against the counter.
"I guess we get to wait for Shepard," I said.
"Shepard?" one of the turians said.
"Hero of the Citadel, Spectre, Commander Elizabeth Shepard. Ever heard of her?"
One of the turians made a derisive snort-like noise, but the other looked at the man behind the counter, and he must have gotten something back, because he elbowed his compatriot and nodded.
Tali stepped aside and got her omni-tool up. I didn't get to listen to the conversation. Actually, I could have called Shepard myself, but since she had offered, I let her do it. I guess she was expecting that I'd be taken into custody. After maybe a minute, she came back and joined us.
"They're on their way," she said.
I nodded, and we waited. Silently. I wasn't sure who was trying to make who uncomfortable, me or the C-Sec suits. Either way, the only one who kept fidgeting was Tali. It didn't take long until a rapid transit shuttle came barreling down and set on the landing platform, and out came stumbling a Spectre.
Nihlus.
My chest felt suddenly icy cold, and my fists clenched without even thinking about it. He looked around, saw us, and when he made eye contact, my heart lurched in my chest. I couldn't even think straight.
He gave us a nod and made for the front desk. I kept my eyes on him the whole time, while he had a short but rather one-sided argument with the guy behind the desk. In fact, all the guy did was type very rapidly while Nihlus gave him instructions.
When he was done, he nodded satisfied and walked to us.
"It's all cleared up," he said. "They never officially released you after the attack."
I turned around and looked at the C-Sec guards. "So where's my stuff?"
"The… lockdown is on the third level," the guard said, giving Nihlus a glance as he spoke.
"Let's go then," I said.
"Morgan," Nihlus called, and put his hand on my shoulder. "I'm sorry ab-"
"Sorry?!" I snapped, turning around in the blink of an eye. "You're sorry?! You left me locked in C-Sec! I had to break out, and you morons left me nothing but an envirosuit to fight a goddamn geth invasion!"
"You had a spirits-cursed munitions dump in there," Nihlus said. "What did you-"
"What? Yes, I wonder what the FUCK I wanted it for! And you left me here without a single gun to my name! And all that for what? To ask me a few questions? With a gun to my face?"
"I did what I had to do," Nihlus replied.
"Well, if what you had to do was hand the galaxy to the reapers on a silver platter, then yeah, you tried. Sorry, you missed by a hair. It's a fucking wonder we aren't all dead." I turned to the C-Sec. "Come on, let's go."
I started walking, and he fell quickly into step, pointing me in the right direction. Nihlus didn't say another word, or at least I didn't hear any. He could have been yelling at me and I wouldn't have heard, there was a pounding sound in my ears dulling everything around me. We got into a lift, and Tali joined us right before the doors closed.
She looked at me, and I looked at her. She looked worried, but I didn't say anything. I was still fuming, and despite all the venting I had just done, I was regretting not having clocked him on the face.
The C-Sec lockup was enormous. Rows and rows of containers, two meters tall each and several more deep – I couldn't tell, most of them were full – loaded with all sorts of crap. We followed the signs until the C-Sec omni-tool's chimed.
"Here we are," he said. He hit the release and the field at the front disappeared. "How are you going to carry all that?"
"I'm not," I replied.
There was no point in getting any of the stuff there, other than a few guns and the two suits of armor (the Hahne-Kedar one was the most important, it had the AI's shield in it). At least C-Sec had been good enough to store everything with due care. It took me just a minute to find what I was looking for, and started picking up the things. I put on one of the spare shield harnesses I had, hanged my custom shotgun off the back of it, secured the pistol on the side, and put the assault rifle I had stolen from the asari commando on my back. After that, I put the two suits of armor in their respective cases, and made for the exit.
"Hey," the C-Sec called. "What about the rest of it?"
"You can throw it off an airlock for all I care," I replied.
I heard him mutter jackass, but I ignored him. We made it to the lift, and I hit the down button before the C-Sec could join us.
This time he didn't just mutter the jackass remark.
"That was mean," Tali said.
"That's the idea," I replied. I looked at her and sighed. "Sorry. You came to visit me and I've been dragging you all over the place."
"It's fine! I'm glad to see you're feeling better," Tali said, which made me chuckle.
"Anyway, what are you up to?"
"I'm going back to the Flotilla," she said.
"Oh. Well, you've had one hell of a pilgrimage, haven't you? I bet it'll go down in the history books."
"I hope so," Tali said, her eyes narrowing in amusement. "I would not want any other quarian to have to go through all this."
"Amen to that," I replied.
"Where are we going next?" Tali said. She actually sounded excited.
"This is all I had," I replied, lifting the armor cases. "What do you want to do?"
"Flux?"
"Flux."
It was like a metaphor for the entire Citadel. Flux was an absolute mess. Some of the larger debris had been cleared up, but the damage to it was extensive. And even with all that had happened there, it was busting with activity, with people coming and going, drinks being served, two of the quasar machines robbing fools of their credits, and music blaring from a portable jukebox turned a little bit too loud for its hardware, the sound coming through a little distorted on the higher notes.
Shepard sipped her drink and looked around. People were still gawking and pointing, so she still kept her smile on and returned nods to the curious.
Just smile and nod.
Putting a brave face on was what everyone was doing, and that's what she had to do too. That's why she was spending so much time out there. Being seen. The Hero of the Citadel was still there. The Council had shamelessly paraded her as a way to reassure everyone that they had the situation under control.
Like hell.
Hackett had ordered the fleet to protect the Destiny Ascension, and sacrificed far too many good ships and good people to save the Council. They had made a very touching speech about how grateful they were about it, but Shepard knew better. They were only as grateful as she was for the waitress who had brought her the drink. It was her job, after all, and it was only natural that she did. Same for all the people that had died to save them.
Maybe she was just bitter. They had had a very close brush with total annihilation. She was still trying to digest all that, but it was true. The magnitude was just too great for her mind to process it. Outwardly, she believed it was over. They had won. It felt incredible, it vindicated all the sacrifices they had made. Or so she told herself. Williams, Alenko, Grieco, Felawa, Jenkins, they hadn't died in vain.
We have to find Liara.
She checked her omni-tool for the… she didn't know how many times she had checked it. She had been promised by the Council that they'd put all Spectre information resources at her disposal to find her. They, too, were quite interested, for obvious reasons. If she was still alive.
"Shepard!"
Her eyes followed the voice, and she waved back at her quarian friend. Good old Tali. Source of eternal optimism. And next to her, much to her surprise, was Roy. He looked better than the last time she had seen him, but not by much. She didn't like the hard look on his face; it didn't suit him. She had to admit, though, it did seem to fit with the fact that he was armed to the teeth, and carrying two armor cases to boot.
"Hey you two, come to join me?" Shepard said. She realized then that she was starting to slur her words. Whoopsie. "Please say yes, I'm feeling like a fish in a fishbowl. I'm expecting people to start tapping my head to see if I'm real."
"Are you?" Tali said, and she leaned forward to tap Shepard's head.
"Oi!" she said, swatting the quarian's hand away and laughing. "Roy."
"Shepard," he replied, dropping the cases and sitting down.
"Doctor let you escape I see. Did she realize you're still limping?"
"Maybe, dunno," he replied flatly.
"Let's get some drinks in you, that'll help," Shepard said. She waved at the waitress, and she promptly rushed to the table.
"Commander?"
"What's your poison?" Shepard said, looking at Roy. She only got a shrug back. "Bring him a lemon shandy."
She waited, but Roy didn't respond. Damn. She was going to have to amp it up, or so was her first thought. Then she decided she better not turn his screws too tight, because she was terrible at it.
"And for you?" the waitress said, turning to Tali.
"I… don't have an emergency induction port with me," Tali said.
"Just bring her a straw," Roy said.
The three of them turned to look at him, and he gave his characteristic nonchalant shrug. A straw? Really?
"In that case, a green guva? Triple filtered," Tali said.
"Triple filtered green guva and a straw," the waitress said, jotting down on her omni-tool and taking the empty glasses in front of Shepard.
"Shepard, how long have you been sitting here?" Tali said.
"Aww, you do care," she said. "People keep buying me drinks, I have to be here to take them!"
"Can you stand?" Tali said.
"I don't know! I'm not sure I want to find out either," Shepard replied. She turned to Roy. "So! What are you planning now? You've saved the galaxy, what about a holiday?"
"Got a couple of things to do," he replied.
"Uh-oh, I know that look," Shepard said, and pointed a slightly unsteady finger at him. "You're about to get in trouble. You need help?"
"No."
"Royyyy, I'm not going to let you get in trouble alone this time. You've nearly got yourself killed… how many times?"
"Too many," Tali replied.
"Yeah, too many."
"It's fine. I've actually got help this time," he said. "What about you?"
"Little old me? Nothing much, have a few drinks, make myself visible, clean up the remains of the geth fleet, find Saren, the usual," Shepard said, raising her beer and giving it a good gulp.
"Wait, Saren?" Roy said, sounding surprised. "You didn't kill him?"
"We didn't even see him, and we looked. All we found in the room was a pile of geth scrap and little old you," Shepard said.
"And a crazy killer robot-geth thing," Tali added.
"And a crazy killer robot-geth thing. Which broke my poor Mako."
"I think you were way ahead of him in that respect, Shepard," Tali said.
"The Mako was fine! A bit bent but that was it!"
"Shepard," Roy said, interrupting them. "You landed the Mako on Saren. Did you check under the tires?"
"No? We landed on that killer robot-geth…" Shepard said, trailing off. "That was Saren?!"
"Or what was left of him, yes," Roy replied.
Shepard looked at him, then at Tali, and started laughing. Tali joined her soon after, and the two of them kept laughing for what seemed like an eternity. Roy didn't say a word, he just watched them with a nonchalant expression on his face.
"I won!" Tali finally said between gasps.
"You did!" Shepard replied. "You got him before Nihlus or me!" She added, her too gasping for air.
By the by they got over the surprise, and Shepard opened her omni-tool to make a note. "I'm going to have to update the Council on this one. They're going to love it. I guess that just leaves the geth fleet."
"Right," Roy said. He didn't sound even one bit surprised by the whole exchange. "How are you going to manage that?"
The waitress came back with the drinks, and placed them on the table. Tali squealed in surprise and took the straw in her hand, looking at it with such wonder Shepard thought the quarian was hearing some heavenly music in her head.
"It's an emergency induction port!" Tali said, looking at the straw poking out of the sealed glass.
"It's a straw," Shepard said.
"Emergency induction port," Tali insisted.
Shepard chuckled and raised her glass. "Roy? How am I going to do that? With the Normandy, and a few good marines, how else? Oorah!"
"Ourai!" Tali said, raising her glass with one hand while fiddling with her suit with the other.
Roy picked up his glass and raised it. "To the marines. And the chief."
"To damn good friends," Shepard added.
The three of them drank, and put their glasses down in silence. Damn, Roy sure knew how to put a damper on things.
"So when are you leaving?" Roy said. He was about to say something else, but looked like something caught his eye and stopped talking.
"I have a few things to do," Shepard said. "Couple of places to visit before leaving again."
"Places?" Roy said, his attention back on her.
"Yeah," Shepard said dryly.
She sipped her beer, trying to wet her mouth again. It had gone dry just thinking about it. There were four families she had to visit personally, to tell them she was responsible for the deaths on Virmire. They deserved better than to be sent a dry letter from the central office. Each of them had been awarded medals for their actions on Virmire. It seemed like a poor consolation.
"I want to come with you," Roy said.
Wait, what?
She looked at him in surprise. He seemed serious.
"Really? Why?"
"You know I have experience with the geth," he said. "I want to make sure this is finished."
"Aaaand there you are, you're so cute when you're being coy," Shepard said. "Whatcha planning? You're gonna have to tell me this time."
He opened his mouth, and instead of speaking, it looked like his eyes went out of focus. It was very odd, like he wasn't looking at her anymore. He blinked a couple of times, and looked at her.
"… trust me?" he said.
It was so ridiculously simple and innocent, Shepard cracked up laughing, so much that she nearly fell off her chair, garnishing the attention of everyone around them. Roy looked rather uncomfortable at the attention, but didn't say anything.
"Really, how can I say no to that?" Shepard said, looking at Tali.
"Don't look at me," the quarian replied, sucking on her emergency induction port. "If you let me I'll take him with me and keep him!"
"Ah, nah nah nah, he's coming with me. You're on Roy, we'll be leaving in two weeks."
"Two weeks," he muttered. "All right, I'll be here. Don't leave without me."
He stood up, much to Shepard's surprise, and looked at the back of the bar. Shepard followed his eyes, but couldn't recognize anyone there.
"Leaving us so soon?" Shepard said.
"I'll be right back," Roy replied, and made for the darkened back of Flux.
That fucking AI.
I had just had a literal shouting argument with the AI. Well, one side was shouting: me. She just gave me those creepy, ridiculously robotic answers to my very angry questions.
I was supposed to let Shepard die.
Like hell.
The AI had insisted that without Shepard's death and resurrection, the timeline would never resolve. I had yelled at her a very hearty bullshit, but she had been adamant. Not just that, but she declared that it was so imperative she would not let me interfere. I ended up bargaining for the crew, which was a way for me to justify being aboard the Normandy.
Shepard had agreed. I was on. However, with the AI watching, I couldn't warn Shepard about anything. Literally, the AI continued to remind me during the whole conversation I had had with her. So I had to save her during the Collector attack. Which meant I couldn't save the crew at all – I couldn't warn them. I had to figure out to get Shepard to safety while catching everyone by complete surprise.
I had a couple of ideas already.
In the meantime, I sat in a dark corner at the back of Flux and brought my omni-tool up.
"What have you got, Gee?" I said, looking at the info on the screen.
"We have identified seventeen ships of appropriate design," Gee said. He had compiled a whole list of parts from shipyards that were compatible with the Atlas class cargo ships.
"Gee, have I told you how great you are?"
"Yes."
"Well, you are. Thanks a lot buddy. Have you given some thought to my proposal?"
"We are establishing a consensus."
"Well, whatever you decide. Just remember that you can count me in."
"We will incorporate Morgan-Messenger into the consensus."
"This is interesting," I muttered, bringing one of the listings up. "Metis Class science vessel."
I looked at the specs. The ship itself had quite a few light years on it, but it was of much more modern design than the Atlas class. But the important part was the modular design, it was based off the Atlas class, a series of hexagonal compartments with the main plane perpendicular to the axis of the ship. Modules aside, the rest of the ship might not be in very good nick.
I should ask Tali about it.
"Hands up, hand me all your credits," a feminine voice said. As she spoke, I felt the barrel of a pistol touch the back of my head.
"Hi Kasumi," I said, not looking up from my omni-tool.
"Really," the thief said, lowering her gun and plopping down next to me. "You saw me waving at you, didn't you?"
"Yeah, that's why I came here."
"While I was cloaked."
"Yes? You know it's easier to spot you when you're moving."
"If I didn't know you, I'd be very depressed about my abilities as a thief right about now."
I chuckled and lowered the omni-tool, turning to look at her. Her eyes were still as striking as ever, peering at me from below the edge of her hood.
"You're the best thief in the galaxy," I said. "Take it from me."
"Thanks!" she said. "How are you? I wanted to go visit, but I didn't want to break into an Alliance ship. Unless I have to, that is," she added with a mischievous smirk.
"Getting there," I said. "There's only so much modern medicine can do."
"I know," she said. She sat back, and her smile thinned out. "I heard about Mika. Sorry. She was nice."
"How… Right, best thief in the galaxy," I replied. "Yeah, she was."
"Is that why you're looking at shipyard classifieds?"
I shouldn't be surprised she knew what I was looking at. Or how she seemed to know everything, really.
"Yeah. Upgrading an Atlas class."
"The old cargo ships? They still fly those junkers?" Kasumi said. "Might as well throw it away and start again."
"You haven't met many quarians, have you?"
"Met one," she replied. "You're right. If the rest are anything like her, they probably have it running better than the original."
"Yeah."
"Anyway," she said, and brought her omni-tool up. "I'm sorry we couldn't fulfill our contract."
My omni-tool chimed with an incoming message, and I opened to see a transaction alert. Most of the money I had given Kasumi.
"What? You got rid of the monument."
"We didn't get it off the station," Kasumi said. "Sorry about the missing credits, but a girl has expenses."
"Still was a big help. If the geth had unloaded all that in the middle of the presidium, things would have been very different."
"We aim to please!" Kasumi said. She reached over and flicked through my omni-tool, bringing the classifieds up again. "Get that one, and don't pay full price."
"I can't pay full price, it's more than what I have."
"Then you better learn to haggle," she said. She stood up, leaned over, and gave me a kiss on the cheek. "Take care Roy."
"You too," I said. "And thanks."
Kasumi smiled, adjusted her hood, and started to walk off when I stopped her.
"Kasumi," I called.
"Yeah?"
"Here."
I pulled the case with the medal out of my pocket and tossed it at her. She caught it deftly, and opened it to take a look. I swear, there was a glint in her eye when she saw the shiny thing inside.
"What's this?" she said. She traced the edges of the medal with her finger as she spoke.
"They gave me that for nearly getting myself killed. The way I see it, you earned it, even if they'll never know."
"Me? What for?"
"Saving the Citadel, of course. If you hadn't dropped the relay, we'd be all speaking reaperish. I figured you should get the medal, and since I assume you don't want the recognition..."
"Best thief, not the most famous," she said. "I'd say I can't take this, but-"
"But it's so shiny, you can't resist," I interrupted.
"You know me so well!" she said, laughing. "Thanks!"
"Enjoy it," I replied, and waved at her as she cloaked.
Author's Notes: Okay. That just happened.
It really did.
Some of you saw it coming (hello LordGhostStriker!), but yeah. All the fighting, all the effort, all the medals in the world didn't help when it came to save the one person Roy was hoping to help during the invasion. Shit sucks. I'll elaborate more on this during the next chapter (I wanted enough room not to rush it), but yeah. The issue here is that Roy's outlook of the timeline has been coloured by the AI and Bitch Shepard getting on his case, so he didn't recognize there's people who did care for and supported him. Only one he really made a connection with was Mika (and to a lesser degree, Kasumi). And he failed.
Not exactly, of course If you know what we all know about the ME1 timeline, he probably saved the galaxy (and even the council recognized it!), but it was still shit. And yeah, next chapter I'll work on this.
Bottom line is, life sucks when you're Roy. What's the point of saving the galaxy if the people you care about don't make it. In case you're wondering, of all the people he knows, Shepard is the one who could understand that
This was always the plan, this was always happening. And it sucks (I do feel bad about bad things happening in my stories, believe it or not), but now that it's here, it sucks. BUT: In the long term, things will get better.
Anyway.
Reviews! A whole page of reviews last chapter, thanks a lot! I actually had this new chapter ready for a while, it just took some time to get Divergence ready. Sorry about the wait!
Noob-LubeTM: Thanks for the correction!
Misuki00: Thanks a lot! Yeah, it's mostly on Gee this one, he's downright awesome, and I hope you'll apreciate it when I reveal what I have planned for him! :D
LordGhostStriker: Bad things happen to good people. The ME timeline sucks :(
Rainsfere: For a change, Roy is just going to take a compliment at face value and take it! Gee's the unsung hero here, nobody knows I've been working with a geth and kicking ass thanks to him (them?) That's gonna change. Roy's indebted to him, and he's going to pay him back.
eurodox59: I have Overexposure Syndrome, I think. I should trust my audience to connect the dots more often and skip some of the details :)
bluemarlin, general-joseph-dickson, fan-rei, Toothless is best, BJ Hanssen, wars apprentice, TehUltimateAZZHOLE, Zeru'Xil, thanks y'all! Really appreciate the support :)
What's next? Well, spoilers: Exactly two scenes coming next chapter. That's it. Two of them. Stay tuned, Tali'll be a special guest! Until then, thank you everyone for reviewing, following, and reading my work. I really, truly appreciate it.