Okay ladies, chapter 46 is officially up! This one is going to be a lighter chapter, I hope that's okay. Please enjoy and let me know what you think!

I laid Gracie into her crib. Her eyes began to open slowly. I turned the small dial on the mobile over her crib, and soft music began to play. As soon as she heard the music, she closed her eyes again, making me smile.

I went back into the living room, ready to take Abel to his room since he fell asleep on the couch. I looked outside on the porch, and Jax was out there smoking a cigarette.

He didn't even look at me at dinner. He barely said a word.

I slid the glass door, and stepped outside. He stood up straight from leaning over the rail and looked at me as I closed the glass door.

"Hey, Jules."

"Hi."

"The kids asleep?"

"Yeah. I still have to get Abel into bed. He passed out on the couch."

"I don't blame him. That couch is pretty damn comfortable," Jax replied, blowing out his cigarette smoke.

"Are you okay? You didn't say anything at dinner, and you barely ate. Was something wrong with the food?"

"No, it was great. I just have a lot on my mind, that's all."

I went over to him and stood next to him.

"You wanna tell me what's rattling in that head of yours?"

"I wish I could, but I can't."

"Does it have something to do with my accident?"

He nodded.

"Then Jax, you have to tell me. It might help me remember."

"I can't do that."

"Why not?"

"It could make things worse."

"More worse than me not remembering a single thing over the past year? Please, you have to tell me.", I asked with pleading eyes.

"Jules, don't look at me like that."

"If it gets you to tell me, I'm going to keep looking at you like this."

"I... I can't."

"And you call me stubborn."

I walked back over to the sliding glass door and opened it. I turned back around and looked at him.

"My first checkup is tomorrow morning. The doctor said I shouldn't drive until she says it's okay. You mind coming with me tomorrow?"

"Yeah, sure. I was going to go with you anyway. I'll have Lisa, the nanny, come pick up the kids for a bit."

"Okay. Thanks."

"Jules."

"Hmm."

It's the best thing for right now. You not knowing."

"If you say so," And I closed the door, walking over to Abel.

He wanted to tell her. He really did. But, what if the memory of the attack causes her to have breakdown of some kind and he can't help her? Yeah, he wanted her memory to come back just as much as she did. But, he's willing to start from scratch, and make her fall in love with him all over again.

Lisa picked up the kids around nine. Once she and the kids were gone, Jax and I took his motorcycle over to the hospital.

As we opened Dr. Monroe's office, she smiled.

"Hi, Julia. Jackson. How's everything?," she asked standing up, shaking our hands.

"It's fine."

"How's your head feeling, Julia? Any pain?"

"Not so much. Not anymore. "

"That's good. The bruises and swelling have went down considerably. Here, change out of your clothes and put this on."

She handed me a hospital gown.

"Your husband and I will meet you at room 314B. A nurse will bring you over, okay?"

I nodded, and she shut the door behind the both of them.

"So, how is she doing? Is she adjusting to her surroundings?", Rachel asked, walking with Jax.

"She's doing really well, considering what has happened to her. But, she's frustrated that she doesn't remember anything."

"That's understandable. What about you? How are you doing? "

"I can't lie to ya doc, it's hard as hell. I can't show any affection toward her because I don't want her to feel uncomfortable."

"It will get easier."

"For who? Me or Jules?"

"The both of you. Healing takes time," she responded, opening the door to 314B.

The nurse was already in the room with Julia. Jax watched as Julia slid her engagement and wedding ring off and gave it to the nurse. The nurse handed the pieces of jewelry to Jax who had a confused look on his face.

"She can't wear any type of metal for the brain scan."

He nodded and looked through the window at Julia.

"Okay, Julia. You can lay down and be as still as possible," Rachel asked through the small speaker.

I did what I was told and laid down on the hard table.

Please let everything be okay. Please let everything be okay.

The table moved slowly a couple of times, and then stopped completely.

"Great job, Julia. You can sit up now."

"So, is everything okay with her?"

"Yeah. Everything looks perfect. You have a tough wife on your hands."

Jax smiled and went into the room where Julia was.

"So, am I okay?"

"Yeah, everything's good."

I jumped lightly on the table in excitement and hugged him. Jax tightened his grip around her, letting the aroma of her Love spell perfume and coconut conditioner fill his nose. He sighed in want.

We both pulled away, and I got off the table. The nurse brought a wheelchair in and wheeled me back to the room where I had my clothes.

I got changed and Jax was waiting outside my room. We started to walk toward the elevator.

"I don't know about you, but I'm starving."

"I am too. I could really go for a burger and fries with a vanilla milkshake," I replied with a smile.

The elevator door opened, and we walked inside. Jax had a grin on his face.

"What?"

"Nothing. I'm just glad you have your appetite back, that's all."

"Yeah, sure."

We went over to Ernie's diner. It was the closest one by our home.

As we walked inside, we got a couple of confused looks thrown our way. Jax just written it off.

I take it, this has happened a lot.

The hostess sat us down at a booth and laid two menus on the reached into his pocket and took out my engagement ring and wedding ring.

"You don't have to wear these if you don't want to. "

"No, Jax. I do. We are married, aren't we? Why not wear the rings," I took them out of his hand and slid them on my left ring finger.

The young blonde perky waitress, Jenny came over to our table to take the food orders.

"Hi, what can I get you today?," she asked Jax, not even bothering to acknowledge that I'm at the table.

I wish I knew why, but an overwhelming feeling of jealousy washed over my body.

"Hi. My wife and I are going to have a bacon cheeseburger with fries and a vanilla shake," he said with a smile, getting a sudden frown from Jenny.

She nodded and took our menus. She quickly walked away, talking under her breath.

" Most guys don't see the way women look at them. But, not you."

"Yeah, well she isn't my type. Not anymore."

I broke eye contact with him and looked out the diner window.

"You ever notice you do that, Jules?"

I looked back at him.

"Do what?"

"When someone, especially a guy, gives you a compliment, you look away."

"No, I don't."

"It's adorable."

Please, please stop flirting with me. I don't know how much of this I can take before I hop over this table and have you take me right here and now.

We finished eating shortly when we went outside, it was pouring outside, and it just began to thunder and lightning. I stood behind Jax.

"Should we wait it out?"

"It's supposed to be like this for the rest of the day. Did I ever tell you how amazing it is to ride in a storm?"

"No."

"You wanna give it a try?"

"Jax, I doubt we can repel lightning."

"Jules, come on. I won't let anything happen to you. I promise. Come on," He offered his hand, already standing outside the diner door, getting drenched.

I took his hand hesitantly and got on the back of his bike. He handed me my helmet and he started the bike. I wrapped my arms tightly around him.

He drove off, and I closed my eyes. He wasn't lying. It was incredible. The sound of the chopper against the vibration of the thunder underneath the bike made my heart race. As the thunder got louder, it felt like nature was challenging Jax to go faster on his bike which he did as we inched closer to home. All of the sudden, I wasn't afraid of a storm anymore. I embraced it more than any person should.

As he pulled into the driveway, I unclipped the strap of the helmet. He pushed the garage button on his small key ring, lifting the doors. He parked it inside next to my car and turned off the chopper. I got off the bike with a smile.

"I told you it was amazing."

I tipped the helmet. It had a couple ounces of water in it and we were both soaked from head to toe. I started to laugh.

"If I get pneumonia next, I'm going to say you broke your promise."

He put his helmet on the handlebars, running his hand back through his slick hair, watching his wife go into the house. As he stepped in, she handed him a towel.

"Thanks."

"You're welcome," I started ringing out my hair in the towel. I closed the distance between me and him and gave him a hug.

"What's this for?"

"For today. Thank you for being there."

"Where else would I be?"

I smiled and pulled away. I felt his lips mold against mine, and his hands holding tightly on my hips, making my breathing stop.

He pulled away quickly after he realized what he did and probably seen the shocked expression on my face.

"I'm sorry. I couldn't help myself."

I moved my hands to each side of his face.

"Don't be sorry. I wanted you to," my lips just grazing his.

His hands moved from my hips to just under my ass, lifting me up onto him. My mouth found its way back to his, and he started moving further into the house. I peeled off my leather jacket, hearing it smack loudly against the hard surface floor. Jax pulled our lips apart for a minute and laid me down onto the couch.

He sat up, pulling his sweatshirt over his head. I reached up, and touched his cold and wet abs. He leaned back over me, and his hands started to unbutton my jeans.

I arched up my hips, letting him pull my jeans off further. He stopped at my feet, pulling off my black flats. As soon as the flats were off, so were my pants.

I got up from laying on the couch.

"Where you goin', babe?"

"Nowhere."

I had him sit straight. I fell to my knees and undid his belt as fast as I could. He pulled on my arms, until I was straddling him.

His hands found the bottom of my shirt and lifted it off of me.

Our heavy breathing drowned out any sound that was around us.

I bit his bottom lip, and he groaned, biting mine as well.

Both of his hands slid up my back until they reached the strap of my bra.

"Jax, Jax wait."

"What is it, Jules?"

"I can't do this."

"Yes, we can. Married people have sex all the time. Well, not all married people, but we are definitely one of them that has sex all the time."

" Jax, trust me, I remember how incredible that night was before you married Wendy. As much as I want to relive that and bang your brains out right now, I made a promise to myself that I wasn't going to sleep with you until I get my memory back."

"That promise can be broken. I won't be mad."

"I think we should wait. "

"What if I put it in this much? Does that count?," he asked showing me with his hands.

"I'm afraid so. I'm sorry."

"Jules, it's okay. But, you do know I'm not going to make this no sex thing easy right? I know what your weaknesses are."

"I know you do."

I got off of him and picked up my wet clothes and went into our bedroom, feeling awful I led him on that far.

Jax laid his head back on the couch and looked down at his erection.

Looks like he's going to have to finish himself off.

Fuck.