Slime Princess had only been with Finn for ten minutes when her plan was interrupted. As they made their way to the Monster, where Party Pat's rap battle was underway, another acquaintance appeared: Engagement Ring Princess.

She leapt at them from the crowd ahead, waving frantically. Her appearance was still disheveled from her travels the night before, but she saw that as an advantage.

"Thank Glob I found you, Finn!" she cried. "I need your help! It's an emergency!"

The hero sprung into action and unsheathed his sword.

"How can I help?" he asked confidently.

"Come with me, please!"

She grabbed his robotic hand and pulled him along. The change in direction threw SP from his shoulder. He looked back to apologize but she was already out of sight. ERP guided him the opposite way he'd been going—away from the rap battle. Everyone else, however, was eager to witness the event.

The outskirts of the kingdom became sparsely occupied as the party-goers were drawn toward the center. It was through these nearly-empty streets that they ran until they came upon a deserted alleyway. They were in the bad part of town, someplace Jake would have frequented years ago. Finn never questioned her distress—this was a prime location for crime to occur.

"In there," she said, suddenly much calmer.
He stepped ahead of her, weapon at the ready, but found nothing disquieting.

He turned to face her and asked, "Uh...what's the problem, again?"

She said nothing. She smirked at him, as though proud of her scheme. She placed herself to block his exit.

"Y-you said there was an emergency. ERP, what's the emer—"

"There's no emergency, Finn," she said softly. "I'm just...so lonely. I need a hero."

She started to approach. Her stride was fearless and evocative. Her eyes never shifted; her gaze was fixed solely on him. Something about her behavior was distressing, though the human couldn't quite pin it. Nevertheless, he followed his instincts and backed away.

"Let me give you your present," she cooed.

He recognized her tone, her gate, her attitude...it was a common dungeon trap. The 'Honey Pot', Jake called it. An alluring figure would appear—usually a beautiful woman—and she'd be unnaturally interested, aroused even. Then, when you were vulnerable, she'd transform into a beast, rob you, or kill you. He experienced it firsthand in The Dungeon of the Crystal Eye and rightly avoided it in Joshua's Dungeon.

Finn wasn't prepared to abandon his training now; he treated the princess—or what was disguised to look like her—as a threat.

"Finn, what's wrong?" she asked, pouting for effect.

"I'm not falling for this. I know what comes next. You'd better back up or I'mma use this." He slashed the Night Sword through empty air.

"You...you don't want to…" she faltered. She expected hesitation but not outright refusal. "I'll be gentle—I—I just—I wanna have some fun."

His guard remained intact. They were stuck in a stalemate. Finn was defensive, uncertain of what this fiend wanted. Engagement Ring Princess was confused, clueless as to why the hero so adamantly declined sex.

Then an impulsive thought ran through her mind. They were alone—not only was the alley unoccupied, but the street beyond it had emptied. She decided to fast track her pursuit. The princess gripped the top of her tattered dress and started to pull it down.

"What—w-what a-are you d-doing?" the hero stammered.

She offered a sly smile in response.

The garment fell to her waist, exposing her bare chest. Finn yelped with surprise and lost focus. He lowered his sword and stared, completely entranced. Her bosom was nothing impressive, but it was the first time he'd seen a woman topless. As she giggled, her small breasts bounced ever so lightly, her nipples swayed and caught his eye...it was hypnotic.

A voice screamed in the back of his mind, telling him to overcome the distraction, to avoid the trap. It faded from recognition the longer he stared. A little part of him felt this just might be worth dying for.

She didn't stop there; she pushed the dress further down until it slipped past her thighs. Without pause, she slipped her thumbs into the waistband of her panties and worked to remove them as well.

Their moment was cut off by a blinding light from above. The fire person descended from the sky, barreling toward their alley. It landed between them and reformed. It was Flame Princess. She took a moment to catch her breath.

"Thank Glob I found you!" she said, looking at Finn. "I've been searching all day—you can't see anyone in those crowds! I finally spotted you when those people cleared out...I've got something important to tell you and—"

She turned to identify who else was present and immediately recoiled at the sight of ERP, who was now fully naked. The hero, who still didn't seem to notice FP's presence, leaned to the side and peered past her, his mouth hanging agape.

Phoebe rolled her eyes and expanded to block his view.

"Get outta here, ya tranch!" she screamed at Engagement Ring Princess.

She hurriedly re-dressed and ran off—there was no telling what an enraged Fire Elemental would do. Once she was gone, Phoebe resumed her normal form.

"That is what I've gotta talk to you about," she said.

He shook his head, as though recovering from a trance. "W-what's goin' on?"

"Finn, they want to use you—the princesses. They had some kind of pact or, like, a law even. They weren't allowed to date you or...y'know...do anything else with you until you turned eighteen. And now they're all going crazy—they're fighting over you."

The human couldn't help but smile at the news. Never before had this been a problem (or blessing, rather) for him. Usually, he was the one to seek a partner—and he was always turned down. After all this time, it wasn't because of him...they had to turn him down. And now...now he could have anyone he wanted!

All his past crushes rushed through his mind. The thought of Bubblegum lingered...was this the reason she always turned him away? But she was with Marceline now...surely she wouldn't still be interested. Then the vampire lingered...was she bound by this agreement too?

"So, like, who exactly is comin' after me?" he asked excitedly. "Who's involved? Is it just princesses, or could Queens be—"

She scoffed. "This isn't a game, Finn. I'm serious—they'll tear you apart. You've gotta be careful."

"Yeah, but I need to know who's a threat if I'm being careful," he said. "Right?"

"Everybody," she said, a hint of jealousy in her voice.

"Even you?"

She gave him a contemptuous glare. "Are you even upset? They made rules about you behind your back."

He shrugged.

"Ugh...c'mon Finn! You can't seriously be considering…"

The smile was yet to leave his face. "Why not? It is my birthday, after all. What's the harm?"

Flame Princess didn't know what reaction she'd expected...but it wasn't this. She was a little hurt, having gone out of her way to warn him. And now he threw it in her face. Before she could lose her temper, Phoebe backed away and ascended from the alley, then flew off toward the Fire Kingdom.

Finn was left behind, still grinning, having not yet realized his ex had departed. When he finally did, he was no less happy. If FP was upset, he could mend things later. For now, he wanted to explore this golden opportunity.

The human strutted from the alley toward the town center, eager to make-out with some princesses—unaware that his suitors wanted much, much more of him.

Meanwhile, a bat fluttered from the alleyway carrying a little umbrella. It rushed over top the busy streets and glided into a window of the castle. There, it dropped its source of shade and transformed back into the Vampire Queen.

"He's into it!" she cried.

Bubblegum smiled giddily.

"No—he's into all of it," she clarified. "He's not gonna push the others away any more. We've gotta get 'im in here fast."