On a desolate world, the Titans and Winathians were at war. On the Winathian side, Garth and his two siblings, Mekt and Ayala, were at a frontline HQ center. "Report," Garth ordered Ayala.
"The Imperial Guard told me they're, like, willing to die at their post and stuff," Ayala said exhaustedly.
"I already know that. I want to know the chances of their survival," Garth said gruffly.
"We're keeping our position for now but the enemy has positioned new units here and here," Mekt said, pointing them out on the map.
"They're looking for a weakness," Garth surmised.
"They may have found it. We're taking on more casualties," Mekt said grimly.
"I have a message from the Titans suggesting terms for a cease-fire," Garth said.
"The Titans are liars," Mekt shot down.
"There is another option, someone I have dealt with. An Insane man who has proven to be evenhanded with the Titans. His name is Prince Mon-El," Garth considered.
On the USS Nemo, Mon received a transmission from Kara on his laptop. "You sure he wants me of all people?" Mon asked skeptically.
"Leto thinks you're the one to resolve this crisis," Kara shrugged.
"I don't resolve crises, I start them," Mon frowned. "Where is this place?"
"It's on the border between their two empires, both sides claim it is theirs. They have been fighting over it for the last century," Kara explained.
"Why do I give a shit? Let them fight it out another hundred years," Mon rolled his eyes.
"We have an opportunity to win over the Winathians into the Galactic Federation here. Mon, this is the first time the Titans have asked for your help in an actual meaningful way. You must win over the Winathians while not pissing off our Titan allies," Kara said.
"I'll get there when I feel like it," Mon said uncommitted and signed off.
As expected, Mon took his sweet-ass time getting there. He had a casual dinner with Imra and Eltro before their arrival. "I've been reading up on this conflict. It's a Class-D planet, no bigger than Earth's moon," Mon detailed.
"Sounds like a piece of shit planet. Why are you fighting over it?" Eltro asked curiously.
"The Winathians tried to terraform it. Once an atmosphere was developed, they created a settlement. They were going to make it a paradise and we couldn't have that," Imra said bluntly. "It's of strategic importance to Titan space. The Winathians refused to allow our inspectors to take a look to see if it was being used as a military base. We suspected they were building weapons of mass destruction. We invaded and removed the colony."
"I understand the planet has an abundance of hydrocarbons," Mon smirked.
"The Winathians left us little choice. A surveillance satellite was placed in orbit. The planet has been deserted for nearly a century," Imra said defensively.
"Until now," Mon smiled.
The USS Nemo eventually arrived and was escorted by two Titan Cueretes-class cruisers. Leto and his subordinate captain boarded the Nemo to discuss the plan of action. "The Prince of all Insane doesn't like being kept waiting," Mon scolded Leto.
"You took three days to get here and, in that time, scores of our soldiers have been killed," Leto said pissed off.
"So...how can I help you?" Mon asked with false sincerity.
"Why would an officer of the Winathian Imperial Guard ask for your personal involvement?" Leto asked accusingly.
"No clue," Mon admitted.
"I'm involved in extremely difficult and dangerous negotiations. I don't consider your presence here an asset," Leto said bluntly.
"Well, fuck me," Mon said insulted. "If that's how you feel, you can get fucked. I've assessed the situation and I'm leaving."
"Wait...," Leto backtracked. "Six days ago, Commander Ranzz landed on this planet and occupied the settlement. Naturally, we attempted to enforce the Treaty of 2927 by kicking their ass. We have regained control of half the colony but we have taken some losses and three men have been taken hostage. Ranzz is open to talks to give back those hostages only if you act as a mediator. For some odd reason, he finds you trustworthy."
"Trustworthy?" Mon frowned.
"Say it ain't so, captain," Eltro said shocked and appalled.
Mon quickly recovered. "So, you're asking for our...help."
"Yes, I'm asking for your help," Leto said painfully.
"I'll see what I can do," Mon said with false sincerity.
"That's hardly reassuring. The last time you meddled, a spy station was exposed and a priceless monastery was destroyed," Leto lectured.
"I can't please anyone," Mon said dismissively.
"Sub-commander Nerok will accompany you to represent our interests," Leto insisted.
"I guarantee you he'll be a casualty of war within the first five minutes of landing," Mon said darkly. "If I bring any Titan with me, it will be Imra."
"Very well," Leto allowed.
"Shit," Imra sighed.
An Atlas-class cargo shuttle exited the Nemo and headed to the planet. "The Winathians are jamming our comms and navigational sensors," Imra reported to Mon. "I'm approaching the landing coordinates Ranzz gave us."
"You better hope they're accurate or you'll be rucking the difference," Mon said to her.
"Did you have a chance to read the territorial compromise?" Imra asked, knowing the answer.
"I glanced at the title," Mon mocked.
"The compromise is at the heart of this dispute. It's a fucking big deal," Imra lectured.
"You're fucking high if you think I'm reading a twelve hundred page document in a foreign language," Mon rebuked.
"Did you glance at any of the other materials I sent to your quarters?" Imra asked accusingly.
"I don't read, I lead," Mon refused. "I was up til 2 a.m. playing video games instead," Mon said. "You trying to say I'm unprepared for this mission?"
"My father believes you will fail. I was hoping some advanced preparation would prove him wrong," Imra said sincerely.
"Thanks, but I doubt I'm going to impress Ranzz by quoting Titan treaties," Mon rolled his eyes.
"Do you have a strategy or are you going to wing it like every other situation?" Imra asked condescendingly.
"The first thing I'm going to make clear is that I'm no peacemaker," Mon said seriously.
Mon and Imra landed near the Winathian HQ. They could hear the sounds of artillery fire from both sides in the distance. They walked about a busted-up town and were quickly ambushed by Winathians. "I'm here to talk with Commander Ranzz," Mon said to them.
"No one said anything about a Titan escort," Mekt sneered.
"You didn't say to come alone. I brought her here specifically to piss you guys off. So, let's fight," Mon taunted. Mekt gave an uncertain look. "Don't worry about her. She helped expose the listening post like a total traitor. As the daughter of the chancellor, she would make a great hostage."
Mekt nodded and then escorted them to the HQ. "Well, your table is shit and there's no champagne or shiny pens. You call this a negotiation?" Mon mocked as he entered.
"The Insane sense of humor," Garth smirked. "You'll have to forgive my security precautions. The moment your Titan science officer tries to influence my mind, I'll have her shot. After all, we're aggressive, illogical."
"Good," Mon said pleased.
"I was being sarcastic," Garth said insulted. "You're here because you shit-talk to anyone and everyone without prejudice. You truly don't give a fuck how many worlds you piss off."
"I hope to escalate this war. I advise you to kill the hostages," Mon said seriously.
"Hostages? You mean prisoners of war," Ayala said offended.
"Whatever," Mon said dismissively.
"The hostages are alive," Imra reported to Imra, sensing their minds. She then turned to Garth. "You violated the treaty," she accused.
"Nearly one hundred years of Titan oppression. You annexed a world that belongs to us," Ayala said passionately. "You placed our people into refugee camps and then evicted them from their land."
"After you set up a military base and fired rockets at us," Imra recalled.
"As you can see, even after a hundred years, the situation has both sides pissed off," Garth mused. "We will release the hostages if the Titans remove all military forces, the compromise is rescinded, and the Titans recognize Winathian sovereignty over this planet."
"You're fucking high if you think they'll agree to any of that," Mon smirked amused.
"He's a puppet of the Titans," Mekt accused.
"I serve no one but me," Mon assured all the Winathians present. "Now, if you just want someone to deliver your list of demands, find someone else and stop wasting my time."
"The Titans say they're always ready to talk but they're full of shit," Garth said angrily. "I want to talk to Leto, someone who doesn't have to check with his superiors. I want him here on my terms."
"Is that really a good idea? One of your men may be a little trigger-happy," Mon warned.
"I told you this was, like, pointless," Ayala doubted.
"They're going to want something in return," Mon figured.
"Haven't they taken enough?" Garth asked angrily.
"Trust me," Mon assured him.
On the Nemo, Mon and Imra had a meeting with Leto and Nerok. "Unacceptable," Leto said peeved.
"I got you one of your men back," Mon pointed out.
"With the understanding that I will be exchanged for that man," Leto said incredulously.
"Or just let the other two men die. It's not a big deal in the scheme of things," Mon said insensitively.
"Three Winathian ships will arrive soon. They're coming to resupply their men on the surface," Nerok brought up.
"We won't allow that," Leto said dangerously.
"That could be considered an act of war," Imra said obviously.
"That's their decision," Leto said dismissively. "I didn't ask for your help and I don't feel obliged to accept it," he said to Mon.
"My solution is the obvious solution," Mon said obviously. "Your balls are in the courtyard now."
"What the fuck?" Leto wondered.
"It's an Insane expression. It means the next move is yours," Imra explained.
On the planet, Mekt was skeptical. "May I speak?"
"I know what you're going to say," Garth rolled his eyes. "We discovered this planet, we terraformed it, we settled it, it will be ours again," he promised him.
"We came here to fight. Why back down now?" Mekt asked aggressively.
"That Insane prince can turn the surface of this planet to glass. He can destroy it completely if he wants to. I have seen him in action. I know his Insane ways," Garth said.
"If we attack now, we can have the Titans on the defensive before our ships arrive," Mekt pressed. "There's no reason to wait."
"I respect your opinion, but I am in command," Garth told him off.
Mon, Imra, and Leto came down to the planet in a shuttle. "When we arrive, it's standard procedure for the Winathians to blindfold you, handcuff your hands and feet, and put a red ball in your mouth. It's just a security precaution," Mon warned Leto.
"Thank you for the assurance," Leto rolled his eyes. "Now, if you don't mind, I need everyone to shut the fuck up while I prepare myself for these delicate negotiations," he said as he closed his eyes in deep meditation.
"Ass," Mon said softly to Imra.
Suddenly, the shuttle was hit by Winathian electrical fire from the surface. "The source?" Mon asked Imra.
"Everywhere," she said grimly.
"We should return to your ship," Leto advised.
"And miss out on all this fun?" Mon asked him.
"We lost engines," Imra reported.
"For the love of God, use your instant transmission," Leto pleaded.
"I'm going to crash land us. Brace yourself," Mon warned.
The shuttle crashed on the Winathian side of the settlement. "So, where the fuck are we?" Mon wondered.
"We're in the southeast quarter near the old spaceport. I served here once as a military intelligence officer. Our lines are two kilometers that way," Leto said.
"Yeah, no, I'm looking for the Winathians to repay the favor," Mon said irritably.
"So, you concede it was the Winathians that were responsible for shooting us down," Leto said outraged.
"Yeah," Mon said nonchalantly.
"You're being used by Ranzz," Leto criticized.
"We're only a kilometer away from his HQ. Stop your bitching and let's move," Mon ordered.
On the Nemo, Eltro took command of the bridge and was speaking to Captain Nerok from one of the Titan cruisers. "We detected weapon's fire from the surface. Then, your shuttle crashed in the settlement. Our units are already searching for them. I have been given authority by the High Command to recover Chancellor Leto. We won't allow this provocation to continue"
"You should go down there guns blazing," Eltro said immaturely.
"Our response will be appropriate," Nerok told him off. "I'll keep you uninformed, commander."
"Ass," Eltro shook his head.
On the surface, Garth was pissed off. "I gave specific orders that the shuttle was not to be touched."
"And those orders were followed," Mekt lied.
"You, telling me the Titans shot their own shuttle down with their chancellor inside?" Garth asked incredulously.
"What better way to blame it on us and escalate this war?" Mekt argued falsely.
"I don't know. That sounds like bullshit," Garth doubted.
"The Titans have no moral code, no conscience. They're a race of mind-rapers. They will do anything to get us off this planet," Mekt said. "We should never have agreed to negotiate."
"I want Prince Mon and Chancellor Leto brought to me alive," Garth ordered.
"I'll see to it, myself," Mekt said having no intention of following through.
Elsewhere, Mon, Imra, and Leto continued their walk toward the HQ. "Perhaps, you were more off course than you thought," Leto chided.
"Actually, we've been walking in circles in the hopes of getting attacked," Mon revealed.
"This is the old residential area. We should go west from here," Leto pointed out. The three took cover as shells landed nearby. "Is this the kind of warm welcome you had hoped for?" he asked Mon.
"I'll take a look," Mon said casually and then took off.
Leto then turned to Imra. "You've picked up an Insane accent. Are you aware you were a most promising daughter before this? If you stayed on Titan, I could have used nepotism to give you a safe secretary job that would allow you to have an affair with a high-ranking official."
"I'm aware of that," Imra rolled her eyes.
"Then why have you remained on the Nemo?" Leto asked.
"Without my influence and guidance, these Insane warriors would rip the galaxy apart," Imra said defensively.
"Or, without you onboard their ship, we could come up with a solution to kill their ass and end this drama once and for all," Leto countered.
"I find the work of increasing our sphere of influence over the galaxy gratifying," Imra replied.
"It's a risk we cannot indulge no matter the benefits. You should consider another assignment before you become just like them," Leto pressed.
"Just because I hang out with them doesn't mean I have lost any of my Titan identity. These Insane warriors haven't even shown a fraction of their true power. They're very difficult to kill. It behooves the Titan Empire to have me watching them at all times," Imra argued.
The Winathians suddenly fired on the group. "Take cover," Mon said to them as electrical discharges fired all around them. Leto dropped as he was hit in the shoulder. Imra pulled him to cover.
"How is he?" Mon asked slightly concerned.
"It's not life-threatening but he will need medical attention," Imra analyzed.
Mon stood up despite the electrical discharges firing around him. He fired lazily at the Winathians to get them to back off. An electrical discharge fizzled off his chest armor harmlessly. Mon pointed his index finger at one on the roof and fired. The beam blasted the Winathian apart. Mon then teleported behind Mekt who was firing lightning from his hands.
"Hands up, my itchy finger doesn't have a stun setting," Mon said as he pointed his index finger at him. Mekt turned around with his hands up. "You fired on my shuttle, tried to kill Leto, and undermined the cease-fire. You, really want to go to war with the Prince of all Insane?"
"We just want to fight for what is ours," Mekt replied. "While cowards like Garth negotiate it away."
"Then why not challenge him for leadership? Overthrow him?" Mon asked.
"The fuck?" Mekt wondered. He gave Mon a look of disbelief and then fired lightning at him. The electricity hit Mon full-blast, threw him up into the air, and slammed him back down.
As Mon got back up, Mekt unleashed a storm of electrical energy that destroyed the surrounding buildings. Mon pointed his right hand at Mekt and fired several ki blasts to test Mekt's strength. Mekt electrified the ki blasts before they could hit him. Mon then raised his index finger and fired through Mekt's chest. Mekt fired back blasting Mon into a ruined building. The building then collapsed on top of Mon.
Mon emerged from the smoke and dust unscathed. "You set us up. You lied to us," Mekt accused him.
"That's right. What are you going to do about it?" Mon antagonized.
Mekt fired lightning toward the ground electrifying all the scrap metal lying about. Mon flew up into the air to avoid the charges. Mekt fired on Mon a few times, missing each time. The two hit at the fist forcing them both back with an energy discharge. Mon and Mekt tumbled away from each other across the battlefield. Mekt took a random electrical cable from the ground and recharged himself. Upon reaching full power, he unleashed an electrical storm that covered the battlefield. Floating in the air, Mekt fired upon Titan positions a distance away forcing them to retreat.
Mon kicked Mekt in the midair sending his attention away from the Titans. Mekt fired several times at Mon missing each time and destroying random ruined buildings around them. Mon flew at Mekt and punched him in the head. Using instant transmission, he avoided Mekt's fire and then took hold of him. The two hit the ground and rolled around a bit.
"You, ready to give up?" Mon taunted.
Mekt fired lightning from his mouth into Mon's face in response. Mon kicked Mekt off of him, teleported behind him, and backhanded him to the ground creating a static discharge. Mekt quickly recovered and used the speed of light to hit Mon in quick succession from various angles of attack. Mekt then forced Mon into the air where he kept him there with continuous electrical energy.
"I bet you didn't see this coming," Mekt said to him.
Mon teleported out of Mekt's grip and then punched him across the ground. Mon and Mekt took to the air where they unleashed on one another. Mon fired energy bars around Mekt to pin his arms together. Unleashing his energy, Mekt freed himself and then fired continuous lightning on Mon forcing him to the ground. Mekt kept it up sending Mon to a knee. Mekt laughed maniacally as he felt he was about to win. Mon then ignited to Super Insane and sent the electrical discharge back at Mekt causing an overload. Mekt screamed in pain as his body couldn't handle the intensity and fell to the ground dumbfounded.
Garth, Ayala, and the rest of the Winathians then arrived on the scene.
In space, three Winathian cruisers arrived to resupply the Winathian troops on the planet. The Titan cruisers went to intercept them. Eltro sent the Nemo to get in between them, daring either one to shoot through them. "We're being hailed by the Titans and Winathians," Laurel reported.
"Put them both on," Eltro allowed.
The two captains appeared on the viewing screen, split-screen. "We recommend you move a safe distance," Nerok said dryly.
"I agree," the Winathian captain concurred. "We wouldn't want your ship damaged in the crossfire."
"We will not allow the Winathians to send additional troops down to the surface," Nerok said blandly.
"Our troops have been attacked. We will provide whatever support they need," the Winathian captain insisted.
"Any vessel attempting to land will be fired upon," Nerok promised.
"I'll open fire on any ship that makes me nervous," Eltro smiled.
"Your ship will not survive the exchange of fire," Nerok warned.
"No, but it will mean all of the Jin-Saiyan will declare war on you both," Eltro reminded them.
"This is not an Insane matter," Nerok said lamely.
"I think otherwise," Eltro insisted.
"The Winathians have made it impossible to recover your prince," Nerok pointed out.
"Yeah, this isn't about him. All of us on this ship are ready to give our lives to escalate this war into a full-blown galactic conflict. We're praying you fire upon us, praying you're that stupid," Eltro grinned.
On the surface, the Winathians confronted Mon over the fight. Mon had powered down back to his normal state. "You saw what he did. He was about to kill me," Mekt protested.
"Bitch, please," Mon rolled his eyes.
Imra and Leto then arrived on the scene. "Are you saying my brother, my most loyal man would lie to me?" Garth asked Mon.
"Yeah," Mon scoffed at him.
"Commander, not every Winathian is as reasonable as you," Leto mocked.
"I have served with you my whole life, followed orders that could have meant my death," Mekt said defensively.
"I could have instantly teleported Chancellor Leto to you, but you guys have been so much fun," Mon smirked.
"Is this true?" Garth asked Mekt.
"What did you expect me to do?" Mekt told him off.
"I don't know, follow my orders and not create a galactic war!" Garth yelled at him.
"You betrayed us. It's not too late to redeem yourself," Mekt told him.
"I intend to," Garth said cryptically and then zapped Mekt unconscious. His men then took Mekt away to be chewed out later.
On the Nemo, Leto, Imra, Garth, and Ayala negotiated with Mon acting as a mediator of sorts. "The Imperial Council will not be satisfied until Titan recognizes our sole sovereignty of the planet," Garth said stubbornly.
"I believe I have the solution. The planet will be under the control of the Crown of the Galactic Federation. As such, Winathians will be allowed to settle in these locations," Mon said, showing a hologram of locations on the planet. "They will be allowed self-governance, but they will not be able to cross outside their settlements. We reserve the right to arbitrarily bulldoze settlements for our own settlements whenever we feel like it. The planet will be under constant blockade around the settlements and planetary space to ensure no weapon shipments arrive while under constant surveillance. Should Winathians try to resist my generous terms, they'll be killed at a ratio of, at least, ten-to-one by our drone security forces. Titans will be allowed to visit, visa-free, of course."
"That's a really shitty deal. This real estate you have selected is crap. If the purpose of this meeting was to piss me off, it's been extremely successful," Garth said bitterly.
"I see any negotiation that averts war to be extremely successful," Leto said, virtue signaling. "However, we would prefer our final solution of simply committing mass genocide on Winathian settlers and calling it a day."
"Join me, in a drink, to celebrate our mutual dissatisfaction," Garth offered as he opened a wine bottle.
"I don't drink with inferior beings...but...in this case...I won't make an exception," Leto said smugly.
"Fuck yourself," Garth said displeased as he downed a glass.
Mon casually walked up to Leto and teleported them both to the Winathian homeworld. He then teleported back into the ship's conference room. "The fuck did you just send my father?" Imra asked slightly concerned.
"He will continue talks on Winath," Mon said vaguely.
"Is this really the best deal you can offer us?" Garth asked Mon bitterly.
"Join the Galactic Federation and I won't treat your people like shit," Mon promised.
The two shared a glass. "I'm beginning to like you, Insane man," Garth said slightly tipsy.
"As do I," Mon smiled. "No homo, of course."
"Of course," Garth said as he shook Mon's hand in friendship.
Author's Notes: I am not necessarily saying the solution to the Middle East crisis is for Israel and Palestine, together, to be a United States territory but...Murica. This episode is basically Star Trek VI with a lower budget and lower stakes. It continues Star Trek's nonsense that non-violent diplomacy solves international problems. Mekt is a Legion of Superheroes villain, Lightning Lord, the brother of Garth and Ayala.