" I challenge you to a Davyback fight if I win I get your ship and the panda" says The masked man.
" And if I win, what do I get? That is if I decide to take you up on that offer" I say
"First of all I didn't properly introduce myself. I am Captain Deadpool of The Deadpooleo Pirates. And you can have this moldy sandwich I've been keeping in my underwear. And I'll give you Spidey, the stupidest member of my crew" says Deadpool.
" How about if I win you give me all your treasure?" I say.
" Okay you have yourself a deal. There'll be 3 challenges. First one is a little game I like to call Deadpool. The second game shall be a three-person cook-off so three vs three. And to make it off there the judges will not know whose dishes who's. Third game is a drinking competition. The fourth game is musical ships.
The fifth game which we probably won't get to because i will win all the games. Will be Captain's fight. The rules are simple: there are no rules. Devil fruits as well as every other skill and ability that you have" say Deadpool.
" Okay, that sounds good to me. Let's get this started.
All of a sudden out of nowhere an Armada of ships appears out of nowhere. Deadpool says " this is my Armada Deadpool clone 211 ate The Higa Higa No Mi. Basically he is the only other clone that can teleport besides me. He is 10 times better than me. He can not only teleport himself but other objects, people or both. His name is Noctis. Oh and if you were wondering there are 497 of us well there were for 498 until you killed Kenny. He was clone 47 Rip Buddy rip. Now to begin the first game each crew selects somebody to participate. I am selecting Stark. He is Clone 3 and one of my admiral" says Deadpool.
" I'm going to choose Viper for this," I say.
We all line up on Deadpools fag ship he say" Welcome to The drunken narwhal's Revenge. One of my 5 ships. Your crew may go first" says Deadpool.
Viper then say" Deadpool may I slither 3 spaces forward, says Viper.
"Yes you may." Says Deadpool.
"Captain Deadpool, may I walk 5 spaces forward" says Stark.
"Deadpool, may I move 5 spaces forward," says Viper.
"No you may move only 2 spaces" says Deadpool.
" Captain Deadpool, I walk 15 spaces forward," says Stark.
"Yes you my iron man" says Deadpool
Off on the sidelines, Senji looks at me and Says " this game is rigged. Stark is only 10 spaces away now. Well at least we got the advantage in the cook-off."
"Deadpool, may I move 4 spaces forward," says Viper.
" Yes you may" says Deadpool.
"Captain Deadpool may I move 6 spaces forward" says Stark
"Of course my little Kumquat," says Deadpool.
"May I move 10 spaces forward" says Viper.
"Yes you may" says Deadpool.
"Captain Deadpool, I walk the rest of the way to you. " says Stark.
Yes you my Booboo. And that concludes the first game. The next game will be the cook-off. Like I previously stated there are no rules however… To make this game fair the judging will be done anonymously. The judges will not know who made what Dish. Asahina and I because we are both the captains will be the judges, And the cook-off consists of three rounds and you will have three participants from your crew" says Deadpool.
"Ok i pick Kuroshiro, Carlos and Ellie" i say.
" My choice will be Wolvy, Darth Vader and Spidey," says Deadpool.
"I make pasta fazool," says Spidey.
" Yes, Spidey. Now shut up" says Deadpool.
We walk into the kitchen of The Drunken Narwhal's Revenge. And it's huge. Me and Deadpool go to the private dining room. Kuroshiro begins to plan out what he will make.
" You tell us what to do and we will do it," says Carlos.
"Ok so i am thinking for this round we need to make something different, something that will wow Asahina and Deadpool. We are going to make it my specialty. My grandmother's famous shrimp and bacon pizza. Ellie, I need you to help me bake the dough Carlos you start on the meat. Make sure not to over cook the bacon." says KuroShiro.
"I have never made pizza before," says Ellie.
"It's Easy i will show you. First we need to make the dough. We mix 4 cups of water and 2 cups of flour in the mixer. Then add in this packet of yeast. Yea now we pour in some olive oil. And some salt. Now we take it out and need the dough. Ok we will leave this to proof for 10 minutes, While we make the sauce. Boil these tomatoes… ok good. Now mash them up so they make a paste. Now we are going to add water and let it cook but we stir it regularly" says KuroShiro.
A few minutes pass and KuroShiro helps Carlos take the pizza out of the oven. " They look amazing and we have 5 minutes left so we are going to make a marinara with leftover sauce. All we have to do is add these red pepper flakes and some garlic powder and let it cook a bit more" says KuroShiro.
Deadpool clone 203 says "5...4...3...2...1 ok that's it" says 203.
"Thanks Turniphead. Well what did you make for us" says Deadpool.
"Wow this is good" says Asahina.
" I really like this one. Ok now this other one it's good that the decision will be hard. Go back to the kitchen and me and asahina will deliberate, says Deadpool.
I look at both teams and I say " this was hard but who made what?"
"Well my team made the pizza. Me and Ellie made the dough and the sauce. Then Carlos cooked up the meat. He also assisted me in taking the pieces out of the oven. Then we all made the marinara sauce.
"We made the taquitos. I made the tortillas. Darth Vader cooked the meat. And honestly we just gave somebody a spoon to chew on" says Wolverine.
" I like spoons. This one is made of wood" says Spidey.
" Well the pizza is better. So that means team Wolverine loses. And we are eliminating Spidey from the cook off" says Deadpool.
" You're mean papa. I was going to make pasta fazool. I want to make pasta fazool…" says Spidey.
" How many times have I told you Spidey I am not your father. Somebody take him to another ship and let him make pasta fazool… The next dish is you must make an entree. But to make it a little more difficult each team will get a secret ingredient however the ingredients will not be the same" says Deadpool.
Deadpool and Asahina go back to the dining room to wait for the next meal. KuroShiro looks at Carlos and Ellie and says " this is good. We have the advantage. There are still three of us."
Both teams go to their half of the kitchen. Turniphead says " ok as Captain Deadpool said both teams will be getting a secret ingredient. So we will pull potential ingredients out of this mask. Team KuroShiro because you won the first part of the challenge you could choose first."
Carlos l walks up to the mask. He reaches in and shuffles the papers in his hand before choosing one. He pulls out his and opens the folded piece of paper. He lifts his head and says to KuroShiro and Ellie " We have to add lasagna noodles. So I guess we are making lasagna."
" Damn Lasagna is not my strongest meal but we will make it the best we can" Kuroshiro says as he begins to plan.
"Now team Deadpool, it's your turn. Come reach in the mask of our great leader" says Turniphead.
Wolverine walks up and says " we will be the one winning this one. Ours is… Ghost Chile's perfect, it's chimichanga time motherfuckers."
Turniphead looks at both teams and says" Start."
"Ok so let's get started" says KuroShiro.
[ Meanwhile In The dining room]
" So what do you think they are making for us now? I hope it's as good as that pizza. Damn that panda can cook" says Deadpool.
" Yes he can and I am not sure. We found him on Noodle Island. He decided to join our crew after he was branded a criminal for killing Gecko Moria. Which is why they call him the Shadow Reaper" I say.
"Interesting… Well, every queen needs a good chef. But they also need a king, is there man in your life" says Deadpool.
"No and even if there was it wouldn't be you. All I need is my crew. They are my family, they are all that matters to me which is why I will let you win and take my crew members. " I say.
[Back In The Kitchen]
" 5...4...3...2...1 your time is up. Please head to the dining room" says Turniphead.
Both teams head to the dining room. Deadpool looks at them and says " well we are again. Let's see their meals."
The first to be revealed is a chimichanga. " Asahina, the way to my heart is a chimichanga," says Deadpool.
" I should care why. Let's get this over with me and my crew we're on our way to get our ship coated. Chimichanga is good but I would like to try the other dish as well" I say. The other dish is revealed and it i s Lasagna. " This lasagna is good but it's missing something," I say.
"I agree with you that chimichanga is the clear winner. Who made the chimichanga" says Deadpool.
" We did Bub. Now let's get this the fuck over with over with I got things to do" says Wolverine.
" Calm down Wolvie" Deadpool says
" I will not calm the fuck down. I'm going to turn my arm in a utensil and shove it up your ass. Then break it off in your ass. " says Wolverine.
" Somebody woke up on the wrong side of the bed. Remind me to sign you up for Anger Management later with our ship's therapist. Which by the way yes we do have a ship therapist. And also he is Deadpool clone 300. He ate the Tori Tori No Mi hummingbird model. His name is Tiki. It was actually a funny story about how I got his name. I once went to this weird universe where the hell is this guy that was looking for shit called innocence. And apparently it was like some freaky power used to fight demons. By far one of the worst worlds I have ever seen. Back to what we were saying, chimichangas wins, the next is desert. Oh and by the way I don't care who's eliminated this round just so I'm just going to pick Ellie. That was the first name I said it was completely random" says Deadpool.
" Ok please go back to your stations for this challenge the judges will know who Cooks What. They will instead just judge the dish on which one is better. In this challenge you're able to make whatever you want however,it obviously must be a desert. However the opposing team gets to pick one of your ingredients" says Turniphead.
" Alright, The Damn panda, how to use green tea powder" Wolverine says.
" That's fine with me and technically it's called matcha powder. And you have to use avocados, says KuroShiro.
" Ennnh fuck my life god I wish it was okay to smoke in the kitchen" says Wolverine.
"Why is your voice so raspy yet all the other Deadpool clones sound like Deadpool? I'm smoking a dirty habit. You shouldn't do it, especially not in the kitchen" says KuroShiro.
" That is none of your fucking business Bubb" says Wolverine.
" Don't mind him, he is always in a very bad mood. And he has COPD" says Deadpool.
" Ok everyone lets start the challenge" says Turniphead.
" What are we making with matcha powder? I do make a mean green tea. However, you're the chef KuroShiro's son" says Carlos.
" No, I actually like that idea. However I make a mean green tea ice cream and green tea cheesecake. You could start it on Brewing the green tea leaves and a little bit of milk. There's a reason you're doing it and milk instead of water. It's because milk will work better for making ice cream. While you are doing that I will be mixing matcha powder cream cheese. I will also make the crust for our cheesecake" says KuroShiro.
29.55 minutes pass and Turniphead says "5...4...3...2...1 your time is up. Please place your dishes in front of the judges. Okay team KuroShiro, please tell the judges what you have made for them."
" Well, we have made green tea cheesecake with green tea ice cream," KuroShiro says in a cocky manner.
" And we made Choco Tacos bitch. However the ice cream inside is guacamole ice cream. I just so you know I hate you all" says Wolverine.
" It's perfectly clear the winner is is green tea ice cream is fucking amazing. Okay asahina it's time for the final challenge you and me and a captain's fight" says Deadpool.
" Fine if you insist. This battle will be over so quickly" I say.
Deadpool and Asahina go up to the deck of The Drunken Narwhal's Revenge. Deadpool says " the rules are simple. We fight to the death or until one of us is unable to fight whatever comes first. But I have the advantage because I am immortal on Can not Die. So good luck trying to kill what can't die."
" Papa, you have to try the pasta fazool I made. I made it special for you so you wouldn't be mad at me anymore. I made it with love" says Spidey.
" I'm in the middle of something, Spidey. You're such a disappointment I should have stopped at 497 and never made you. Tell me what you put in the refrigerator and I'll try it later" says Deadpool.
"Ok Papa" says Spidey.
" Turniphead do me a favor and follow him. And then take the pasta fazool out when he's not looking and throw it in the ocean. I would rather not try something he made that probably tastes like shit. The moderator of this challenge will be Ryan. People say we look alike" says Deadpool.
"Ok, ready to start," says Ryan.
Deadpool pulls out his Katanas and he charges me. I dodge his attacks for a bit then he teleports backwards. He pulls out his guns and starts to shoot " bang bang bang bang" says Deadpool.
I phase them though my body and fly in for a kick. I ignite my foot. I kick Deadpool in the head with my flaming Talon and the Flames from my talents sever off his head.
"Motherfucker I guess this battle over with it's going to take weeks for my body to grow back. Somebody throw my body overboard. It's now useless. I didn't really think that the fight would go so quickly. Ask no big deal my body will grow back. I don't think that'll happen again. I wasn't expecting you to light your whole foot on fire. However you are the Phoenix Queen so I guess it makes sense. Well I guess you have won. As promised, all of my gold is yours" says Deadpool.
" Wait, did you say your body will grow back? I'm so confused about what your actual powers are. So you can teleport, also you can regenerate your body. But yet you can also make clones" says KuroShiro.
" yeah so in the world I come from I am what you would call a mutate. Basically my genes have been genetically modified. Which allows me to use the kinetic energy in my body along with a little device cooked up on a buddy weasel. Funny enough I forced him to eat the Minku Minku No Mi model weasel. Which took me forever to track down by the way. Lucky for us we were able to cryo freeze him. Be that I have been here since the void Century or a little bit before. Me and the Deadpool clones are mortal however the weasel is not. Well he has now we met this guy about a hundred years ago who performed in the dark surgery on him. And then as for me I ate the Kopi Kopi No Mi. Which allows me to create perfect clones in myself however I realized with each clone they lost a little piece of me all the way up the Spidey who the fucking idiot" says Deadpool
" Okay Deadpool it has been fun but like I said we must be on our way thank you for the gold.
" Okay but You Haven't Seen the Last of Me I will make it to the new world and we will continue this fight" says Deadpool.
[ a few days pass and the Phoenix Pirates find themselves on the shores of The Sabaody Archipelago]
" I am going to go shopping. I got tons of new ingredients. I learned so much from Deadpool's crew. Tonight I'm going to try and make us chimichangas. I just need to go and get all the ingredients together, does anybody want to come with me" says KuroShiro.
" I will go with you. I need to get some things anyway" say Carlos.
" While You guys go to boring food markets. I'm going to hit the shopping malls. I've heard they're incredible here. Hey Ellie, why don't you join me? We could probably both use some new clothes. Plus it'll give us some bonding time. We haven't really got that with the constant fighting, the constant running from the world government" says Viper.
"Well I guess I'll stay and watch over the ship. I don't really like big crowds. Put someone to watch over the ship" says Kanda.
" Hey Axel do you want to go see if we can go to a bar and pick up ladies. In my Journeys before getting thrown into impel down I actually came here a few times. The waiting on this island is a sucker for sailors, pirates or Marines. It's funny this place is the only place where the wall is not enforced. Pirates and Marines can drink together and forget about the world. Plus the beautiful maids bars definitely help out" says Senji
" Sounds good to me, maybe you can Regale me with your tail of how you lost your eye. And how you got thrown in impel down" says Axel as they both jump off the ship.
" Well I guess you have a task of your own to do Asahina," says Kanda.
" Yes, I am going to find someone to coat our ship. There's no way we're going to make it to the combelts that were wanted by the world government. I hear there's a very good ship coater named Rayleigh. They say he was once part of the Roger Pirates" says Asahina.
TO BE CONTINUED…