She'd never felt so tired.

At first she thought it was the party - after all, she'd never been to one and the novelty of the situation could wear out one's system – but as the night wore on, she became aware that this was more than just social fatigue.

Kagome swayed to the barely recognizable sound projected over distorted speakers. She felt bodies bumping into her from either side; everyone was clammy, her own forehead hot and damp. Her long hair that had been so effectively curled earlier grew limp as it clung to her sweat.

Hojo held her tightly around the waist; her face was pressed into his shoulder, and a hot ball of anxiety grew larger in her stomach until it obscured her throat entirely. She couldn't talk, couldn't respond, or push herself away as she desperately wished to. Unsure of how she came to be dancing, her weak legs let Hojo hold her up. She was afraid if he let go, she'd fall, but his big flat hand on her back felt uncomfortable and strange.

"Hojo," She heard herself ask in a slurry moan, she felt him move slightly in response, bowing his neck to look down at her.

"You wanna get out of here?" He mumbled into her ear.

Oh, thank god.

She nodded, leaving a damp patch on his shirt as her head slowly moved up and down, dragging the material with her. She felt like she was on rewind as he threw his arm over her shoulder and helped push through the crowded living room. Why am I so hot– was it hot? It must be so hot. Her thoughts ran into one another as the party moved around her in waves of animation. She saw Yuka come into view, Hojo and Ayumi talking, heads ballooning in her sight like cartoons.

The next thing she saw was the dashboard of a car, felt a hand on her forehead, lips on her own.

"Ugh," the noise she managed became crushed against lips that smashed up into her teeth, she sloppily pushed a hand out and felt the heaviness of someone's skull. Her eyes fluttered open.

Hojo.

"What happened?" She asked, both to herself and her friend as he stared down at her, teeth flashing with a drunken smile.

"Relax." Suffocating, again, she couldn't breathe against his face. She was getting annoyed, needed to get home, needed to lay down.

"Cut it out!"

But she couldn't reach her hands out again, couldn't tell for a moment that they were pinned, or where, until her eyes caught up with her. Hojo held her wrists together in one hand, lazily leaning into her so her back pressed against the passenger side door of his car. With her hair pulled back in a clenched and greedy fist, his pose left him open for one more instance of reaction – she lifted her knee into his stomach.

"Uff- you-fuck!"

Pain burned through the side of her head, the thud of skin hitting skin dazzling her back into confused images sloshing one into the next. The door behind her opened and a furious hand gripped her body, cool night air chilling the sweat on her arms until the cold made her sick, throwing up as her legs dragged on the ground and a careless and angry enforcer pushed and pulled her until they were inside.

He finally let her rest for a moment on the floor of – wherever they were, she imagined it had to be his home if he had the keys. But where was his family? Wasn't there someone?

"Why are you doing this?" She held her arms over her face weakly, still retching from the acid burn of throw up. "How…" She hadn't even had anything to drink and yet…

Her mind reeled back, foggily recalling the small toast, Hojo picking up her cup and passing it back to her with his palm over the top.

She tried to move her arms, gave every effort to lift herself from the floor, but by that time he had fallen over top of her. He was bigger, and though a little drunk, quicker against her slow, poisoned movements.

"Please." She tried to beg, every ounce of waking ability flooding to the effort of speaking and staying awake. "Please, I'll do anything you want, just not here."

He seemed to contemplate this for a moment, resting on top of her painfully to keep her from escaping.

Finally, he answered, "Where then? Where do you want to do this? It's your first time after all." He leaned in and kissed her neck, making her shudder violently, she wondered how he even knew this for certain. "Let's make it special."

Her eyes filled with tears as she answered without thinking, "The well house at my family's shrine. Please," she felt his thumbs on her cheeks and the sensation of his hands brought a new slow boil of sickness. She closed her eyes to look away from him and his compulsive stare. "It's the only thing I want. I can't move anyway. You can do whatever you want, just take me there. Please."

"Your family is away." He hesitated, licking and groaning against her neck as tears slid from her face to her collar bone, pooling coolly where she couldn't brush them off. "I've been watching, you know… good to know you aren't trying to fuck with me. And, for your sake, I wouldn't."

He suddenly lifted her into his arms. She felt the warmth of the floor beneath her leave and the discomfort of his swaying as he drunkenly left his own home, keys jingling in hand. He clumsily staggered across the yard he'd just dragged her through and piled her into his car again.

"You're lucky I have a real thing for you, Kags." Slamming the door so violently the car shook, he locked it behind him with his key fob.

Too soon he was in the seat beside her, hand resting hotly and threateningly on her knee. He sped toward her family's shrine, grip growing stronger as they approached. She tried to lean away but when she did, he dug in his nails, eyeing her fiercely in the rear-view.

Through the haze of whatever he had put in her drink, she held herself awake and told herself she would do what she knew she had to do – even if it meant throwing herself as hard as she could into the well, aiming to land directly on her neck. She had waited three long years without Inuyasha, not once thinking about the possibility of becoming close to another person. She'd be damned if this was stolen from her, too.

She watched the city pass by out the window, plotting, trying to keep her eyelids from falling shut. Three years. That had been the worst, worse almost than this -

She just had to stay awake for three more blocks.