[Between 4x23 + 5x01]
June 30, 2011
Stefan,
Something's up. I've gone over that phone call over and over again the past two weeks and I know that something's up. I've been upset that you told me that you wanted to go off on a couple of errands for Lexi and that you needed some space but…Stefan, I know you would never want to do that. I mean, you just proposed. We were supposed to start a new life together and you wouldn't want to defer from that for a couple of months.
So, I've concluded that something's happened to you. If you get this letter and you call me back, then I'll know that I'm being dramatic. But until then, I have reason to be worried. Now, I'm not trying to be that clingy girlfriend and stuff because I'm not that person, you know I'm not that person. It's kinda hard to believe that, though, when I have Joel telling me that Damon thinks I'm overreacting. I'm not, though, okay? I'm not.
I've been having dreams about you, Stefan. They're not the fun and sexy kind of dreams. I have dreams of you suffering and calling out my name. Sometimes I have dreams of us at our spot, only a few hundred feet away from Steven's Quarry where we confessed our feelings for each other. It's crazy, right? I mean, I'm not Bonnie and I don't have the premonition thing like regular witches have. I think that my worry for you is just translating over to my dreams but they seem so real sometimes. What if they aren't dreams and I'm having real That's-So-Raven visions about you? What am I supposed to do, babe?
I wish you were here. I miss you so damn much.
I love you.
Sincerely yours,
Lucy
July 7, 2011
Stefan,
I tried to send that letter to you with that spell that I used last year but it didn't work. Instead of bursting into flames, it just sat there, unharmed and unmoved. I gotta say, Broody, that worries me. I should be able to send you letters. So, I tried a location spell; I got blood from Damon—and got a lecture in the process ("Leave him alone, Twitch. He just wants some time before he has to be married to you for the rest of eternity.") and I may have given him an aneurysm but that's hearsay—and did the spell and there was nothing. I couldn't find you.
I'm really worried, Stefan. I don't think you're dead because I feel like I would know, you know? But I'm really worried about you. I think someone took you; I don't know if Silas made some buddies before Bonnie sucked the life out of him and wanted to get revenge or that some witches are using you for their hoodoo experiments. But I'll find out, Stefan. I will find you, even if it takes the rest of my life.
We didn't have much time to talk before you left to dump Silas in the quarry but there was a reason I helped Bonnie lower the veil to the Other Side. See, I wanted to have my brothers back. And I know what you're thinking but I was careful. I brought Kol back to life with instructions to stay away from our siblings—even though I totally think he could take them since he was very clearly caught off guard last time—and he's living his best life right now.
Jeremy's alive too but he's having a hard time adjusting. He's quiet and spends a lot of time by himself and he seems angry some of the time. I try to talk to him and I get through that thick shell of his sometimes but I think it's just hard for him, especially since Bonnie is traveling with her mom this summer. He has to go back to school in the fall and I think it's a bad idea, as does he. Unfortunately, we're the youngest siblings and we have no say. It's very, very annoying.
This must be all unimportant nonsense to you but since I know these letters aren't getting to you, it's kind of like a place where I can share what I'm feeling. Just like we could share with each other.
I miss you, Broody. I miss waking up by your side and grinning because your hair is all over the place after a night of sleep. I miss the twinkle in your green eyes and your dimpled smile when you find something exciting. Honest to God, truth, I watched Battlestar Galactica because you told me it was just so great. I have to disagree with you, babe, I think Star Trek and Star Wars are far better but you like it and I wanted to feel close to you…
I know you're most likely having a hard time right now, but I'm trying to find you. Hold onto that. Hold onto the fact that I love you so, so much. Hold onto me.
I love you.
Sincerely yours,
Lucy
July 17, 2011
Broody,
You'll never guess what happened within the past ten days. I'm going to be an aunt! Yes, you heard me right. And no, Jeremy did not get anyone pregnant. It turns out that Nik's werewolf side is able to procreate. Isn't that weird? It is, but I'm grateful anyway.
Remember Tyler's friend—was she really his friend, though; I mean, she betrayed him and sent those hybrids to their deaths—Hayley? Well, she has a sister and she and Nik had sex and now she's pregnant. Emma is great and very much more tolerable than her sister and it might be the romantic in me, but I think she and Nik look great together.
There was this whole mess down in New Orleans that we had to deal with that had to do with Emma and the baby but it's all cleared up now. Nik and Elijah are moving down to New Orleans and I suspect that Rebekah will to once she and Matt are done with their summer vacation in Europe. I think Kol will go, too. I'm gonna miss them a lot but I'll visit whenever I can. I'm gonna spoil the newest Mikaelson, for sure.
Right now, Caroline and I are on our way to New York to talk to a witch that Kol knows. Caroline is driving as I write, so don't worry. I know that you always worry when I drive but I'm honestly not that bad. I think it's just your old man anxiety.
Anyway, about the witch. Connie is old and powerful and she apparently adores Kol like a grandmother would. They met each other in the early 1900s in New Orleans—go figure—and unlike the other witches who were born there, she can do magic anywhere. Long story short, Kol thinks that she'll be able to help find you. I hope she can. I'm putting all of my hope into the fact that she can help. I don't know what else I can do.
If Connie can't help, it doesn't matter. I'll keep looking and I won't rest until your home safe and sound. I promise that I'm gonna do all that I can.
I love you so much, Stefan. Just hold on for me.
Sincerely yours,
Goofy
August 1, 2011
Stefan,
Connie couldn't help. She told me that a witch, too powerful for her—or me, or both of us—to overpower, was hiding you. We couldn't get a location on the witch and we couldn't get a name. We couldn't get anything.
I don't know what to do, Stefan. I really don't. My hope is waning but I can't let it. Because if I let hope go, what kind of person am I to tell you to keep hope? And I want you to because I'm not letting this go. I'm not letting you go.
Joel's good at computers, as you well know, so I'm going to ask him to get into any traffic patterns or databases or whatever the government uses to track people. It's very illegal but I don't care. Maybe he'll be able to find something that magic can't.
I love you, babe.
Sincerely yours,
Lucy
August 8, 2011
Stefan,
I gave up my spot at Duke. I don't want to go without you and since that witch is still hiding you, well…it looks like I'm not going to Duke. I don't mind, though. Once I find you, we have time to go to Duke. We have time to go anywhere we want to go.
In the meantime, I'm going to Whitmore. It was my second choice, after all, and Caroline will be there. Joel and Jeremy have been great and I talk with my Original siblings daily, but it's really her getting me through this summer. Tyler's helping some wolf pack in Tennessee, so she's without him, too. Yeah, we've been eating a lot of cake…mostly coconut or pineapple upside down cake.
So, I'm rooming with Caroline…and Elena and some random girl since Bonnie's deferring for a semester. It's a suite, with me and Caroline in one room and Elena and the random girl in the other and some living space in the middle. It's actually pretty nice. I toured the place with Caroline, Elena, and Liz—yes, there was some very awkward tension between me and Elena but we got through it—and already Caroline's cooking up a way to coordinate our rooms.
I've had a lot of dreams about you lately, Broody. I don't know what to make of them. It's more of the same thing that I mentioned in a previous letter. The bad dreams are bad but the good dreams, where you and I are sitting in our spot? I cherish those. They make me feel like you're actually here, laying in bed with me. And then I wake up and you're gone and I want to cry for the whole day.
I just want to let you know that I'm still looking and I'll never stop. I know you're alive. I don't know how I know but I just do. As long as you're alive, I'll be searching for you. I'm gonna bring you home. I hope that gives you some comfort in whatever hell you're experiencing.
Stefan, I love you and I miss you so much.
Sincerely yours,
Lucy