Half a Life Without You
Chapter 11: Manipulated
Severus POV:
I don't know what I expected; Dumbledore is a Gryffindor at heart after all. A fact I stupidly forgot as I blurt out everything, how I followed Lupin and Madam Pomfrey, how I had always suspected Lupin was a werewolf, and yes how I eavesdropped on Black and Pettigrew in the hall. Dumbledore listened quietly as I told my side of the story, silencing Black and Potter with a mere glance whenever they thought to interrupt.
"That's how I nearly came within inches of my face being clawed off by Remis Lupin." I finish with an emphasizes on the word clawed.
"I see" he sighs unhappily. "I had hoped the truce would put an end to such foolishness. Sadly, it appears I was wrong." He slowly walks toward us steepling his hands under his chin, his eyes focusing on me "A valuable lesson was learned tonight, and I hope you now have a deeper appreciation of the truce, I do believe without its protection spell compelling Mr. Potter this evening the results of this… unfortunate lack of judgment would have ended…terribly." His eyes piece mine and I get a sense he's talking solely to me and my lack of judgment…that is utter bullshit.
"Hold on… "I sputter out in astonishment. "Are we not going to address that fact that I was nearly eaten by a werewolf?" Oh, and please explain why the compulsion to protect didn't work on Black, he seemed pretty ok with literally throwing me to the wolves." I ask completely flabbergasted.
Dumbledore's expression turns decidedly icy at my question, "Mr. Snape, you of all people should realize the truce does not override a person's free will. You admitted to purposely leaving the castle after dark, following a member of Hogwarts faculty without their knowledge, intending to unveil Mr. Lupin as a werewolf, and punching Mr. Black in the face. The physical violence alone goes against rule number 3 from the Truce you signed only days ago. Do you deny this?"
I'm completely taken aback by his question; how dare he turn this around on me. "What? Physical violence goes against rule three…what?" I laugh humorlessly completely baffled at this point. "Remis Lupin should not be allowed to be at Hogwarts. He. Is. A. MONSTER!" I shout, purposely punctuating each word in my overwhelming frustration.
"He's not a monster!" Blacks calls out with fury. "You…
I cut him off before he can finish his next sentence, "He certainly wasn't wearing a fucking Halloween costume! How do you explain the claws, fangs, fur, and overwhelming urge to BITE people?!" I screech at him.
"SILENCE!" Dumbledore's raised voice catches us all off guard. "Mr. Snape while I appreciate your perspective on the matter, Mr. Lupin will be staying at Hogwarts and his secret will remain protected. Is that understood?" His face no longer held the icy demeanor from earlier, but his eyes were still narrowed ever so slightly when his gaze met mine.
They were all staring at me silently awaiting my answer. I glower back at them contemplating how I should respond. Black glares at me from behind a now bloody wash cloth still pressed to his nose, his eyes flashing with self-righteous indignation. Asshole, I think before turning my gaze towards Potter, who I idiotically expect will support me. I could not have been more wrong; Potter stands stiffly beside Black shooting me an equally glacial stare. I guess his compulsion to protect was long gone.
Dumbledore's dominating presence fills my vision now, his eyes boring into mine as he patiently waits for my answer. The large room suddenly feels ridiculously small, I begin to feel hot and sweaty. I tug the neck of my robe to hopefully stop the feeling of being suffocated. It was at this instant of discomfort and anxiety; I knew if I continued with my argument, it would be me saying good-bye to Hogwarts not Remis Lupin.
Self-control is a finite resource, but I somehow manage to maintain mine in this moment. Regardless of how badly I want to scream, shout, throw a tantrum, punch Black in his smug face again, I keep it bottled up and with my teeth clenched, I spit out two words, "I understand." I feel my shoulders droop in defeat, hating myself for agreeing to keep my silence.
I disconnect from the rest of what he went over with us, something about additional securities, and taking ownership of our actions, blah, blah, blah. "Severus?" I hear Dumbledore calling my name.
"Yes?" I respond finally focusing back in on the conversation. Dumbledore arches his brow thoughtfully, silently analyzing my blank expression, "I would like for you to be in my office tomorrow morning by 10am. I want to review the tutoring plan for our newest student, Everly Quinn." He says grinning mischievously. Dangling the proverbial carrot in front of my face, sneaky manipulative bastard. "Also, to address your earlier question about Mr. Black's reaction to the protection spell, he was the one who told Potter where to find you, it's not something he would have been induced to share if not for the protection spell. A part of him knew what telling Mr. Potter would mean. The spell doesn't take your free will away only attempts to correct poor choices. You are all still responsible for your decisions and their possible outcomes, we were all extremely fortunate how things unfolded...this time."
"I understand. I will be in your office by 10am" I answer, choosing to not address his explanation of the truce and its protection spell. My thoughts drift to Every, I can't help wondering if she'll even want to see me after standing her up tonight. I regret my decision to follow Lupin, silently cursing my damned curiosity one more time.
My negative thoughts sap the rest my energy, an overwhelming wave of exhaustion consumes me, "May I go back to my dorm now?" I ask, feeling more and more depleted with every passing minute. I was also more than a little uncomfortable with the hostile scowls the Gryffindor "cubs" were continuously aiming my way.
"Of course, I think we've all had enough excitement for tonight" Dumbledore's eyes twinkling and warm once again. It was very confusing and disconcerting to go from feeling like an enemy back to a welcomed friend.
I mumble a hasty goodbye and swiftly bolt for the door. I speedily find my way into the Slytherin dormitory, moving past the other students excitedly discussing their summer plans, I head directly up to my room. I'm relieved to find it empty and flop heavily onto my bed.
I close my eyes while taking deep calming breaths. I can feel myself begin to drift off, when my newfound peace is mercilessly ripped away by the sound of a distant wolf howl. I grab my wand and rush to the window, gradually pulling the heavy jade curtain back. My eyes scan the darkened castle grounds and search the forest surrounding Hogwarts. Suddenly, three dark shadows and possibly a fourth smaller one, can be seen darting quickly though the open field before disappearing into the tree line. I wildly look back and forth attempting to catch another glimpse.
"Oi Snape!" a voice calls behind me.
"AHHHH!" I scream out, clutching the curtains to my chest.
"Bloody hell! Snape, what the devil is wrong with you. Trying to scare me half to death?!" I turn to see Regulus Black holding his wand up in a defensive posture before slowly lowering it. Sliding his wand into his sleeve, he turns towards the door, "I just came up to see if you wanted to join in on a quick game of Dragon Hearts?" I stare back at him blankly not responding, too busy trying to slow my rapid heartbeat.
"Well? "Do you want to play or not?" He asks impatiently. "Or would you rather continue screaming in your room like a frightened little first year?" his eyes glint with humor noticing my frown.
Feeling ridiculous, I immediately drop the curtain and push myself away from the window, "I'll play." I grunt. He eyes me suspiciously before nodding, "come on then, they're waiting on us to start." He says waving me forward while turning to head out the door, fully expecting me to follow. I force myself to hurry after Regulus resisting the urge to push the curtains aside once more.
When I reach the bottom of the staircase, a wall of loud conversations hits me. There must be over 40 people milling around the common area, I'm suddenly immersed in a small sea of people some huddling together cackling with laughter, some dancing, others drinking large glasses of butter beer. They were all were smiling. Regulus happily greets them as he winds his way through the crowd to the back table.
I follow just a step behind like a dark shadow, weaving my own way through the crowd. I'm just about to reach the table too when a hand claps down on my shoulder. Without considering my actions, I whip around twisting the wrist attached to the hand daring to touch my shoulder. My wand flies into my other hand and I press it harshly into Mulciber's neck. his eyes are big as saucers "whoa there, easy Snape! I didn't mean anything by it."
The room had gone eerily quiet everyone waiting on what I'd do next. I abruptly release Mulciber, "don't fucking touch me." I growl.
"Sorry" He whines before stumbling away and disappearing into the crowd, which was now slowly going back to their conversations, dancing, drinking, and smiling after realizing I was not going to murder Mulciber.
"Snape?" Regulus calls out to me, waving me forward. "What is up with you tonight?" he whispers into my ear as we take our seats at the table. I only shrug, "nothing, let's just play."
"Very well", he says doubtfully.
Flicking his hand, a small deck of cards flies into the air to be shuffled by invisible hands. "Black hearts are wild boys!" Regulus grins impishly as he turns over the top card, which promptly folds itself into an origami shaped dragon before flying around the table spitting tiny puffs of smoke and flame.
Avery and Lestrange dodge the little flames aimed their way after having their eyebrows singed off during the last round. Little burn holes adorn their clothes and Avery clutches a glass of water his eyes never leaving the paper dragon's trip around the table before it unfolds to reveal a black heart. "WOOHOO! I'm on a roll!" Regulus's cries out gleefully. They jump back startled, their chairs scratch loudly on the floor hurting my ears. Avery groans as the card refolds itself back into the shape of a dragon, he pours the glass of water over his head dousing the flames before they can burn another hole into his shirt. I smirk with humor and relax for the first time tonight.
Eventually the common room quieted down after everyone had migrated back into their rooms. Regulus notices the lack of noise around us and takes out his pocket watch to check the time, whistling lightly under his breath he stands up unsteadily while tossing back his drink, "It's late, I'll see you gentlemen tomorrow." I watch him stumble up the staircase leading to our room.
"Are you up for one more Snape?" Avery questions as he turns the deck over in his hands.
"Sure, why the hell not." I respond, enjoying being able to focus my attention on anything other than what may be outside my window.
I chuckle as the little dragon's flames fly towards Avery once again, who narrowly evades being hit with another fireball "I vote Black hearts are no longer wild." He says very seriously as he slaps the flames out slowly engulfing his chair. I look around at the others at the table and we all just burst out laughing.
It's nearly dawn when I finally drag myself up to my room. My eyes are heavy, and I struggle to keep them open, only when the morning light begins to filter through the window do I close my eyes and relax knowing I'm safe…at least until the next full moon.