A/N I bought bread today, so I guess I own that. Doesn't mean I own the rights to the bakery though.
Hello loyal readers! Thank you for your patience. Sadly, I have not been doing as well in my schooling as I had hoped so this will likely be the last update until after exams are over. That's only a month away but still, don't expect it too soon. Fear not! This story will continue, it's just that the next update will be a little later. So here is a slightly longer chapter to help tide you over until then.
Comments:
Uberch01, AREDBADGER, dloodl87, Maersikai, Statess, victor0606, ShortyMcCoy, rythik78, Necromancy94, EntertainmentChampion, , Chaszcz, BClassDemon, Helyanweh, Guest(1), Guest(1) – thank you all. Reviews are always greatly appreciated.
Guest-Questioner – Yes I did look at the timeline for ME on wikia. I may leave out a WW3 event and just have it as a large conflict which the saiyans stayed out of as they let humans do their own thing. As for your idea, I may use the DBZ timeline as a way for the Kais to keep track, or at least the namekians. It won't be a major feature though.
Guest(2), Eljin1, - we will wait and see how things go with the negotiations before we will know if the turians will be resurrected. I imagine that the idea of saiyans being able to bring people back from the dead might make things a little more interesting for the galaxy as a whole, wouldn't you?
Guest(3) – humanity is not weak. They were able to take out half of a fleet much larger than they were and gave heavy losses to the ground troops before the saiyans arrived. The saiyans just so happened to be able to respond faster.
CosmicOneUltimar – I am not sure why people would ask me, but this is the second time that someone has asked me to write their stories for them. The other person just did it through PM. Is it a sign that people think my writing is good enough to write stories with? Regardless, I thank you for your request, however I have found that it is never as easy to write someone else's story as it is your own. I am no Brandon Sanderson who was able to take over the Wheel of Time series. So while I thank you, and anyone else who thinks I would be a good writer for their ideas, I will not be writing a story that I did not come up with.
Natzo – remember that Cerberus came into being after the First Contact War in response to humanity giving up so much of itself to join an alien community. They may come to life here, they may not, but circumstances are not the same. Basically, I don't want to give away too much.
feral creature – yes they will come up later.
.549 – most military people I have met or seen seem to be jerks to people they think are taking over their job. That never usually lasts too long though.
On with the story!
…
CHAPTER 6 - PREPARATION
Councillor Tevos paced around her office, her mind lost to the possibilities and the dangers that were likely going to be forcing themselves on her doorstep far too quickly. That blasted turian pride was likely to be the end of all of them, she cursed. They had sent a fleet and a half to go and forcible overwhelm a new species to make them a new client race. Oh, that had gone swimmingly. Nearly a hundred thousand turians dead or unaccounted for. Nearly every one of them dead and no idea how it had happened! Whatever weapons these new aliens used was far beyond the abilities of any Council race to stop or fight against.
That was why she was pinning so much hope on her adjutant, Matriarch Irissa, to be able to prevent any further conflict between these aliens and the Council races. Having the turians in the background was necessary but they definitely would not be part of the initial ambassadorial escort. There was no way that she was going to risk offending them, not so soon after this… debacle. But that wasn't the only danger.
These aliens knew how to speak prothean. They may even have been prothean, or at least part of their empire. It was highly unlikely that they just had a prothean cache lying around without it. It may be that they knew where all the other prothean relics were.
Such as the beacon hidden on Thessia.
It was a danger that Tevos knew she had to take seriously, which is why she had given explicit instructions to Irissa to try and find out how much they knew, if she could. Speaking prothean was no laughing matter. After thousands of years of studying the Thessian beacon the asari still didn't have an updated language codex on how to properly translate it. At best guess, the current Council knowledge was about 80% accurate. These aliens had obviously a much more accurate translation matrix and had been so prepared that they even included it in their First Contact package. That was not something that 'just happened'.
She sighed and rubbed her hands at her temples, fighting against the headache that was threatening to overwhelm her. Why couldn't this have been a nice easy contact like the hanar? Those sea creatures had been so willing to gain more knowledge of the protheans that they didn't even care that they were still part of the associated races, and were likely to remain that way until the last of the suns in the galaxy burnt themselves out.
She moved herself slowly over to her desk and sat back down at her terminal, reading the last notes from the STG that Valern had sent over to her again. All it did was send her into a deeper level of depressed funk. They basically had nothing. These aliens had formidable weapons and a defensive ability that defied all levels of understanding.
She closed her eyes and allowed herself to take a few deep breaths. She was Councillor Tevos, representative of the Asari Republics to the Citadel Council. The Citadel Council had kept peace in the galaxy for more than two thousand years. They would succeed in bringing these new aliens into the fold. They would keep the peace. They must keep the peace.
A beep on her terminal brought her from her self-affirmations. She reached very and tapped an icon. "Councillor Tevos."
"Councillor, it's Matriarch Irissa," her understudy identified herself. "I am just letting you know that I am about to transit through relay 314. The turians standing by are trying to make me have them as part of my guard. Captain Daryxus is getting quite insistent."
Tevos forced the growl that was building inside her throat to stay hidden, settling for a frown instead. "I see," she said. "Can you patch him into our conversation, please?"
"Of course, Councillor, one moment."
A few seconds later the voice of the turian captain came on. "This is Daryxus."
"Captain Daryxus, this is Councillor Tevos," she said, forcing herself to keep her voice calm. The man had just been a messenger after all, not the one that had attempted to blast a planet from orbit. Small technicalities, she thought bitterly. Had his main gun not been offline then she had no doubt that he would likewise have followed orders and bombed the planet "I am ordering you to stand down and wait for Matriarch Irissa to complete her task of contacting these aliens. You are not to transit through with her or her escort. Do you understand?"
"But Councillor, it would be too dangerous…" he objected.
"Yes," Tevos interrupted with a harsh voice, "it is dangerous. But your ship was one of the vessels that just attacked their world and destroyed their ships. If you or any of the ships still remaining under your guard attempt to follow it could be seen as continuing hostilities which is something that we do not want to happen. You just witnessed the destruction of the equivalent of a fleet in less than two minutes. What possible protection do you think you can provide?"
There was a long pause from the speaker before the turian let out a very asari-like sigh. "Understood Councillor," the man said sullenly. "All turian ships shall stay where we are. The ambassador's corvette and the escorting frigate will be allowed to pass through momentarily."
A click sounded as he cut of the speaker at his end. "Will there be anything else Irissa?" Tevos asked, feeling only the slightest lingering annoyance at turians in general.
"Just pray to the Goddess that we are successful, Councillor Tevos," came the reply. Another click signalled the ambassador had cut off the connection.
I have been doing that since the moment I heard about this race, Tevos thought tiredly.
…
Gohan looked around at the aliens kneeling in front of him with a frown. The kneeling was completely voluntary; Gohan hadn't asked for it. All he had done was fly around the city with the other three saiyans and speaking telepathically with the alien officers for General Williams. Now, some of them were proclaiming that they must be sent by something called the 'Spirits' to punish the turians for their false pride. It was perplexing and no matter how much he told the soldiers to stop kneeling to him it wasn't working. He was just grateful that it was only a few of the whole group. That being said, with only about five hundred that were still prisoners, that meant that only about thirty were kneeling for him, Kori, Andur and Garlack. Still, that was thirty too many in Gohan's opinion. Just because he was technically a god due to his ascendancy, didn't mean that he was on the same level as the Kais.
"Seems like you are going to be having a following among these aliens when they go back to wherever the hell they came from," General Williams mused from his chair, breaking into Gohan's thoughts. The old man had stopped being so hostile after a few hours of interrogating prisoners. Now he was actually quite amiable. Gruff, sure, but no longer hostile. Especially now that the human fleet of spaceships had arrived.
The human ships had arrived several hours ago, more than a hundred strong and led by a woman who had identified herself as Admiral Drescher. Gohan had used Instant Transmission to get up to her flagship, something they called a dreadnought, with General Williams so that they could talk. The ship was about as long as the three larger ships that the aliens, who called themselves turians, had used in their fleet.
To his surprise the admiral had been informed about the presence of the saiyans before she arrived. It made things easier but he wasn't sure how much she had been told. She had been vocally appreciative for defending the planet but other than that was dismissive. "It's in our hands now," she sniffed. "We shall defend against any further incursions. You can go back to interrogations or whatever you need to do."
He had glared at her. "We were only here because you weren't fast enough," he retorted. "I don't answer to you, so stop pretending you can order me or anyone of my people around." With that he had grabbed the general and used Instant Transmission to go back to his base on the planet where he had been prepared to leave. The only reason he had stayed was because General Williams had apologised on behalf of the admiral and had asked him to stay to help out with communicating to the turians.
He realised after he had cooled down a little that he had been more aggressive than he normally was, or at least less patient. It was probably something that came from training the saiyans. None of them were as calm and collected as Krillin or Tien had been. Their personalities, even though they were the more pacifist saiyans, still reflected more how Piccolo had been when Gohan had first started training with them and so required a firmer hand and for him to not take any of their nonsense. Still, he knew that now that the saiyans were going public that he couldn't let another government or their military boss him around. Vegeta would give him hell if he did.
Now that he thought about it, it was probably better that he was here instead of either his dad or Vegeta. Despite how far his dad had come in his studies, he could still be a little bit mindless when it came to dealing with new people. And Vegeta was… well, Vegeta. He was a king and had very little patience for people that he thought were stupid or beneath him. That meant just about anyone. Respect was earned in his eyes, mostly through strength. And a pushy admiral and a grumpy general would have been easy targets for Vegeta's impatience. Still, he might have been more receptive to kneeling aliens than either Goku, Gohan or any of the other SSGs were.
Gohan sighed, bringing himself out of his thoughts. "I hope not," he said. "I am happy just fighting to protect the universe and training the next generation of saiyans. I don't want to be worshipped by anyone. None of us do. That's one of the reasons why we have spent the last couple hundred years trying to not let anyone know we exist. We don't want to have anyone look to us as their gods."
The general grunted. "Good luck with that," he replied. "As I said before, you can fly, speak through people's minds and fire energy beams out of your hands. You even flew around in space and destroyed an entire attacking fleet. Whether you want it or not, people are going to be looking at you wondering if you are God's judgement on the galaxy."
Gohan shook his head. "But we aren't though," he protested. "I have had human friends that I trained with that could do what I can. Maybe not as powerful but they were able to learn how. They helped protect Earth and the universe right alongside me. I was born on Earth to a human mother and a saiyan father. The only thing that makes me special is the training that let me ascend to this point."
Williams looked at him incredulously. "You say humans can do what you do?"
Gohan nodded. "Yeah, one of my dad's best friends was a guy named Krillin. He had been a monk that trained alongside my dad and he helped train me when I was a kid. He was powerful enough in his prime to be able to stop some of the universes strongest villains. He died more than a hundred years ago but some of his great-great grandchildren are around still I think. I don't think any of them still train though."
The military man stared at him with an unreadable expression. "Is that right?" he mumbled, almost to himself.
A beep from the man's computer interrupted any reply that Gohan could have given. The general walked over and tapped a button.
"This is General Williams," he barked.
"Williams, this is Drescher," the admiral's voice came from the speaker. "I take it the saiyan is still there?"
The general looked up at Gohan. "Correct, he is here with me."
"Oh good. Send him up here. I have two alien ships that just came through the relay. One of them is broadcasting a First Contact package and damned if I can read the thing. We need him to speak to them in their minds."
Gohan glared at the computer, feeling irritated at the presumption of the woman. Clearly, she hadn't taken his earlier words to heart.
"No," he said before the general could respond.
There was a long pause from the other end of the transmission. "Excuse me?" the admiral finally demanded. "I have aliens incoming and I have no way to speak to them except for you. Now get up here!"
"I don't think you remember what I said earlier," Gohan said, doing his best to not lose his patience at the woman. "I am not under your command and you can't order me to do anything, Admiral. If you want my help, you will ask nicely, in a tone that makes it sound like a question and not an order. Otherwise I will get my people and we will be off this planet before you can sneeze."
General Williams looked up at Gohan with an expression that made it look like he was trying to hide a smile. The was a long, long pause from the computer.
"Son Gohan, would you come up here and help to communicate with the aliens?" Admiral Drescher bit out.
"I'm sorry, what was that? I didn't hear you," Gohan said, his tone flat as he refused to give in to his demand for politeness.
"I said," the admiral started loudly, before pausing as she caught herself and continued in a much calmer and more reasonable tone. "Son Gohan, would you please come to my ship and help me here so that I can communicate with these aliens?"
Gohan smiled at the general, who looked like he was now about to start laughing. "Thank you, Admiral," he said, keeping any gloating out of his tone. It was just like dealing with saiyans in training. Come to think of it, with her being a strong woman, she would probably be considered a good option for some of the saiyans looking for a wife. "I will come give what assistance I can." Suddenly an idea struck him. "But if you will give me a few moments I will see if there is a way that I can make this whole thing easier than having me just translate for you. I will get back to you soon."
"Really?" the woman sounded sceptical. "Well, I am sure any help you offer will be wonderful." She sounded only slightly sarcastic.
Gohan ignored her, already reaching out with his mind. Dad, you there?
Hey Gohan! Goku replied instantly. You ready for us to use the dragon balls?
No not yet, Gohan thought back. More aliens just arrived and they look like they want to talk. I was just wondering if there was any way that you could help me link up their minds so that they can all talk together and not just with us?
Really? Why can't you do it?
Well, they don't speak each other's language, Gohan explained. The only way that I have been able to talk to the alien prisoners so far is by doing this. The only way I have been able to get more than one person involved in a conversation this way was with other people who knew how to do this. But by doing this then the humans and the aliens will be able to talk to each other without an issue.
Nah that shouldn't be a problem, as long as they don't mind us being in their minds to do it.
Gohan thought about that. The prisoners had been scared and had fought a little after he had started talking to them through their minds. Somehow, he didn't see the admiral wanting to let him in her mind to talk with the alien. Well that might be a small problem. I don't think the humans will want us being in their heads.
Hmmm, that does complicate things. Hey I know!
Gohan frowned. What?
Why don't we ask King Kai to help? He could just give us the languages that we need in a jiffy. He already knows them and he can plant the knowledge in our minds any time you need, if he is willing to help.
Gohan was stunned. It was actually a really good idea, if King Kai was willing to help. It couldn't hurt to ask, I guess.
Sure, give me a sec. King Kai, you there?
Hey Goku! The short Kai of the north quadrant replied instantly. I swear I have heard from you guys more in the last month than I did for a decade or two before that.
Yeah, sorry about that. Hey I have Gohan here too.
I know, I can feel his mind, the Kai replied. Hi Gohan.
Hi King Kai.
So, King Kai, Goku said quickly, we need a favour. You know how you are the Kai for our part of the universe, does that mean you know all the languages for all the different aliens in your area?
Yeah, of course. It's one of the responsibilities with being a Kai.
Great! Would you be able to help us by giving us and a couple of humans the language of some aliens that have been attacking the humans?
Why do you need that? You can always talk like this to anyone.
True, Gohan interjected. But not everyone will be happy with us talking in their minds. I already did it with a few aliens and they were hostile when I did. If you could give us the languages to just a few of us and a few humans then it would go a long way to preventing any more people getting hurt.
Hmmm, I can see you point, King Kai said. I don't usually do this you know. I usually let different races find out their own ways to talk to each other first but if it stops a war then I will do that. But only because we are friends. Oh, and the same condition that I gave you for your training applies.
Ha, sure! Goku said enthusiastically. Hang on King Kai and I will check with the colonel lady that talked to us the first time. I will talk to Vegeta too and see if he wants to get in on it. I reckon he will, being a king and all. He is probably going to need to meet them with us becoming known to the humans and everything.
Gohan grimaced. Yeah, I probably need to have a chat with you about that before we meet anyone.
Ok, King Kai interrupted. So you two, Vegeta and a couple of humans. Is that it?
There was a long pause as Gohan waited for a moment for Goku to reply. Nothing. Uh, dad? You still there?
One sec, Goku replied. His mind faded away for a couple of minutes before returning. Alright, so the colonel lady asked if we could do it for the Admiral that Gohan met and for the ambassador they are sending out there. I told her that I can pick the ambassador up and take her with me and we can get there as soon as King Kai finished. So, I will meet you at King Kai's planet in a few moments.
Wait Goku, give me five minutes! King Kai exclaimed.
What's wrong? Gohan asked.
Well, maybe you two have forgotten but the gravity on my world is ten times the gravity on Earth. Regular humans that haven't been trained like Krillin, Yamcha, Tien and Chiaotzu won't be able to stand it. I need a couple of minutes to lower the gravity so that the humans can come here.
Oh right, Gohan said, feeling a little abashed that he hadn't thought of that. Well, I will let the admiral know and by the time that happens hopefully you will be ready for us.
He cut himself out of the conversation and looked up to see General Williams staring at him. "Uh, what?"
"What were you doing for the last two minutes?" he asked.
"Oh, I was talking to my dad and one of the Kais that looks over this part of the universe. King Kai said that he can give Admiral Drescher the language of these aliens, as well as the ambassador they are sending out. I just need to let her know and take her there. It shouldn't take too long."
The old human just stared at him as if he had grown two heads for a long moment before he shook himself out of it. "You know what? I am not even going to bother. You do what you need to kid and I will see you around."
Gohan couldn't help smiling. "Who you calling 'kid'? I'm nearly two hundred years old."
The old human stared in shock, before his face returned to normal and he grunted. "Not even going to bother with that one either. Go on, you got stuff you need to do. But if you could leave the other three here to help keep those turians in line it would be great. Can't understand why, but the prisoners always behave more when you guys are around."
…
Goku transitioned onto the small planet that was home to his first friend among the Kais. Immediately he noticed that the gravity was nothing like it was that first time he came here all those years ago. He couldn't help grinning as he looked around and took stock of the things that were still so familiar, despite not having been here for more than a decade. The tree and the waist high wall were unchanged, as was the dome house. It brought a pleasant feeling of nostalgia being here again.
The small thud beside him drew his gaze as the human that had been holding on collapsed onto her knees.
"I think I am going to throw up," Anita Goyle said shakily.
Goku immediately reached down and helped her. "Oh, I'm sorry," he said, feeling a little concerned. "Are you ok?"
The shorter woman shook her head slightly. "I just instantly transmitted from Earth to a planet of the beings that defy our knowledge of gods," she said, getting to her feet. "I don't know what I am feeling right now."
"Oh, I can understand that," Goku nodded, using an arm to steady her. "People tend to react weirdly to new information this way. You should have seen me when my son started to teach me mathematics."
She gave him an incredulous look but was saved from replying by a screech as Bubbles made his appearance, followed by King Kai. The Kai was notoriously absent of the ring over his head. A hundred years ago Goku and Gohan had finally gotten around to using the dragon balls to resurrect the Kai, finally keeping their promise to him. He had been extremely grateful; apparently West Kai had been making fun of him every time they saw each other.
"Hey Goku!" King Kai called, walking over casually. "I see you brought the ambassador with you."
"Yeah," Goku replied casually. "This is Anita Goyle. Anita, this is King Kai, overseer of the north section of the galaxy."
The woman quickly composed herself. "It's an honour to meet you, King Kai," she said, bowing respectfully.
"Nice to meet you too," King Kai said, scratching his chin. "It's been a while since I had a regular human come here. I don't think I have ever had one that wasn't trained to use their ki before."
"Well, I am glad for one that you decided to make an exception today, even if it was due to the situation that we find ourselves in."
At that moment Gohan and another woman in a military uniform appeared. The military woman looked only slightly shaken for a moment before she managed to collect herself in a much faster time than the ambassador did.
"Hey King Kai," Gohan waved as he strode over, the woman he had brought with him walking close behind him.
"Hey Gohan," King Kai replied cheerfully. "So, this is the admiral you were talking about huh?"
"Yeah, this is Admiral Drescher," Gohan gestured to her. "Admiral, this is King Kai, the kai in charge of our part of the universe. That is my dad, Goku. And," he stopped as he noticed the ambassador. "Sorry I don't know you."
"Anita Goyle," she replied with a respectful nod. "Human Systems Alliance ambassador."
"Pleasure to meet you," Gohan said politely. He turned his eyes to Goku. "Is Vegeta coming?"
Goku nodded. "Yeah he said he would be here in a…"
A surge of energy flashed through Goku's senses. "Never mind, he's here."
"Hold your horses, Kakarot," a familiar voice growled out as his old friend and rival walked towards the group. "It takes time to move three million people from one galaxy to another, even for super saiyan gods. As it is, I have Trunks, Gohan, Pan, Gotel and the others transporting ships while I am doing this. I just had to go there first to help set them up."
The military lady, Drescher and Anita both looked surprised. "Did you say another galaxy?" the admiral asked, her tone sounding sceptical.
Vegeta narrowed his eyes at the human woman. "Who are you?" he demanded in what Goku knew from experience was his ''friendly' voice.
"Admiral Kastanie Drescher, Systems Alliance Navy," she said, holding her head up proudly. "Military representative to these meetings with the aliens. This is our ambassador, Anita Goyle."
"Admiral, huh? I am Vegeta, King of the saiyans," Vegeta said in his raspy voice. "And yes, the saiyans are currently being moved from New Namek in another galaxy to Mindoir, as the price for our assistance in defending your planet. My son is currently leading the efforts in my absence while I am here."
Both the regular humans looked stunned, if not a little uneasy at the knowledge of the saiyans being involved in more than one universe but neither commented further.
"Well, shall we begin?" King Kai said, bringing all focus back to him.
"All right," Anita said. "How do we do this?"
"Well, first things first," the Kai said. "Payment."
Both the humans looked stunned, as far as Goku could tell. "What payment?" the admiral woman asked suspiciously.
King Kai looked at the three saiyans. "You didn't tell them?"
Goku couldn't help smiling as he rubbed the back of his head. "Nah I wanted it to be a surprise," he said with a grin. Gohan had a little smile on his face. Vegeta just smirked.
The Kai grunted and turned back to the ladies. "For me to do this favour for you, you need to…" he paused for dramatic effect, "make me laugh."
Both the women stared at King Kai incredulously. Predictably, to Goku anyway, the admiral spoke first.
"Are you trying to pull one over on us?" she demanded. "Because I don't have time for this. There are aliens in our star system right now…"
"Oh, I'm completely serious," King Kai interrupted. "It's one of the prerequisites I have for doing any favours. I made Goku and any other people that train here make me laugh before I will do anything to help them. Some of them do it straight away, like Goku here. Others, like Piccolo, just waited and waited for weeks before I helped them because they refuse to do it." He turned his back and looked out at the clouds surrounding the planet. "I have been doing this for millions of years. The only fresh enjoyment I get is from jokes. Kinda like how Beerus and Whis just like to have different foods." He turned back and faced the ladies straight on, his sunglasses flashing. "So, if you want those languages, you need to tell me a joke that makes me laugh."
The lady Goku had brought with him, Anita, looked up at Goku, her expression uncertain. "Did he really make you tell him a joke?" she asked.
Goku felt a little sorry for her now. He thought not telling her would have been funnier than this. He nodded. "Yeah. Took me a little while too," he said. "I like to have fun and all but my grandpa didn't really joke around and Master Roshi was too dirty for King Kai's taste, so I didn't really know any jokes. Didn't stop me from trying though. Besides, it didn't take too long." He felt a little bashful as he remembered it. "I may have yelled at him a little in my delivery because I was feeling a little pressured." He chuckled at the thought.
"Yes, Goku certainly had a way with jokes back then," King Kai confirmed. "Tell you what, seeing as these three muscle heads need to do it too, why don't they go first and you can think of a joke while you wait? Goku, you're up."
Goku thought for a moment. "Hmmm, well I would say: what is orange and sounds like a parrot?"
"What?"
"A carrot!"
King Kai looked a little unimpressed. "Come on Goku, you can do better than that. Besides, Gotel told me that one ages ago."
Goku felt crestfallen, before another one flashed into his mind and he smiled. "Did you hear about the new restaurant on the moon?"
King Kai looked a little surprised. "No, why?"
Goku smirked. "Well, the food is great but there is just no atmosphere."
A long pause followed it. Goku thought he might have had to go again when suddenly King Kai snorted in amusement that quickly became genuine laughter.
"Ok, Goku!" the north Kai exclaimed. "Good job. I'll give you the languages after the others get done. Gohan, you're next!"
Gohan took a step forward. "Why couldn't the salad cross the road?"
"Why not?"
"It wasn't dressed!"
King Kai laughed immediately. "Nice one Gohan! I'll remember that for next time. Vegeta, your turn."
Vegeta looked over at him and smirked. "Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road?"
Every looked at him stunned. The women because they couldn't believe that the serious looking king would lower himself to make a joke about toilet paper, the three men because, well, it was Vegeta. Making a joke. Goku had never thought he would live to see the day.
"I… I don't know," King Kai said, sounding mystified.
"It got stuck in a crack."
Dead silence followed that for a moment. Then all three technical gods, two saiyans and a kai, burst out roaring with laughter. Anita chuckled too while the admiral merely looked annoyed.
"I gotta say, Vegeta," Goku said as his chuckling subsided, "I never thought I would hear you make a joke. Not on purpose at least."
Vegeta grunted and looked away. "I did raise Bulla, Kakarot," he said, his tone slightly raspier than usual. "You remember what a joker she was."
The mood sobered slightly. Even after all this time, the memory of loved ones lost was able to bring them down a little.
King Kai turned to the ambassador. "You're up, Miss Goyle."
The ambassador nodded smartly. "What did the grape say when he got stepped on?"
King Kai looked thoughtful. "What?"
"Nothing. He just let out a little whine."
King Kai let out a chuckle. "Ok, that was a good one," he said after he calmed down. He turned to Admiral Drescher. "Last but not least, Admiral."
She glared at him slightly, in a way that reminded him of his namekian friend Piccolo. Then she sighed and looked like she just wanted this to be over with. "What do politicians and diapers have in common?"
"What?"
"Both should be changed regularly and both for the same reason."
There was a long pause before King Kai snorted again.
Anita Goyle at her fellow human with a dry smile. "I'm not sure if I should laugh or feel insulted."
Goku just scratched his chin, feeling confused. "I don't get it?"
"Probably because you don't know anything about politicians, dad," Gohan said. "I'll tell you later. Are you ready for this, King Kai?"
"Oh yeah," he said wiping a tear from his eye. "So, you are going to want to have the whole list?"
"Whole list?" Ambassador Goyle asked in confusion.
"Sure, there are twelve different races that are part of that galactic community that you are likely to meet," King Kai answered. "I can give you all of them so you don't need to worry about who you will meet. But remember, I am not doing this for any other humans. I am only doing it because Goku and Gohan asked me to do it just this once."
The two women shared a look before Anita turned back to the Kai. "Yes, if you could give us all of the languages used in that community it would be best."
"All right then. Everyone move in close."
They all shuffled closer until they were surrounding him. King Kai's antennae twitched and started to glow white slightly. Goku felt something click in his mind. Then rushed of words and symbols flowed through his head as King Kai gave him the knowledge he would need.
It was over faster than he thought it would be and by the time that King Kai's antennae stopped glowing, Goku felt a little light headed. He looked around and saw that everyone looked the same. Vegeta even shook his head out a little, like he would if he felt dazed after a punch. The two women looked dazed for a long moment before they started to appear normal again.
"There you go," King Kai said, his voice full of satisfaction. "Twelve languages in your minds just like that. Now, you probably will need a little practice to switch through them consciously but to begin with you will be able to understand and reply in a language that you hear without any difficulty. This should be enough until you find another way to work up a translator gadget for your people to use."
Both women nodded, looking satisfied. Admiral Drescher looked back at Gohan. "We should go now," she said seriously. "The aliens are already waiting and we have been gone too long."
"Right." Gohan looked at the group. "Probably faster if everyone just grabs hold of me and I can take us straight to Admiral Drescher's ship straight away."
They all nodded. Anita turned to King Kai and bowed again. "Thank you for your gift, King Kai," she said, very respectfully. "I shall always remember what you did for us today."
Admiral Drescher had a slightly sour look on her face but she bowed too, lower than she had when she first arrived. "Yes, thank you King Kai."
"You're welcome. Good luck out there. And I will see you fellas later," he said, looking at the saiyans. "Remember, we have another tournament in a couple of decades. I guarantee that Jiren will have been training so that he doesn't get beaten again."
"Oh man I can't wait!" Goku yelled, feeling excitement coursing through his body. He had so much fun fighting Jiren. "That is seriously one tough guy!"
"Kakarot, pay attention!" Vegeta barked, already holding onto Gohan with the ladies. "This is no game now. Stay focussed."
"Oh, right. Sorry everyone. Later King Kai!" He ran over and put his hand on Gohan's shoulder.
"'Bye everyone," King Kai called. "Good luck."
With that, Gohan placed two fingers to his head and they instantly transmitted out of there.
…
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