After the lab door closed behind Dr. Dettlof, Callie closed her eyes, puffed out her cheeks, released what felt like all the air in her lungs, sank onto a nearby stool, and let out a self-loathing groan. She'd just broken down in the arms of her ex-wife's therapist; the woman who not only knew all of Arizona's thoughts, feelings, and secrets, but probably more of her own behaviors and actions than she cared to think about. She wasn't sure what came over her, why she fell apart like she did, unless it was the realization that someone else knew about Arizona's miscarriage and the secrets she'd kept from her until just a couple of days ago. When she realized Ginnie knew about Cayden, she recognized the older woman also knew about the rest and she was overtaken by shame and guilt. After that day in the attendings lounge, they'd never talked about it, hell she wasn't even sure if anyone even knew Arizona was pregnant. Though she'd been able to keep herself busy with taking care of Cayden and focusing on her robotic limb project, and not obsess over it since her private little breakdown the previous morning, thoughts of Arizona, their unborn baby, and her own reactions were never far from her mind.
She'd meant it when she said Arizona should hate her and that she hated herself…or her actions at least. Though her ex-wife had told her she could never hate her, she still had her doubts, not because she didn't trust Arizona, but because looking back, she realized what she'd done, the things she'd said were unforgivable. Though she knew the therapist didn't understand exactly how much it was worth to her when she made the off-handed comment, Callie found great relief in hearing that her ex-wife didn't hate her, from the woman to whom she'd poured her heart out over the better part of the last year. Knowing Dr. Dettlof was right and she had to talk to her own therapist and to Arizona about this, neither option appealed to her at the moment, for she knew while talking about it would allow her to heal, it would indeed hurt like hell. Callie rubbed her hands over her face, reached behind her head to pull out the loose bun she'd taken to wearing when working with patients or in her lab, combed her fingers through her hair and wondered who she should talk to first. In her mind, she felt as though talking things through with Arizona first would make more sense. It seemed to work best for her if they had the conversation, then she talked to Dr. Carr about it afterward and analyzed her feelings, put things into perspective. She had an appointment in the morning however and knew she and Arizona wouldn't be able to talk before then. She also knew that even though this was most prevalent on her mind, there were many other things that she could discuss.
Looking up at the clock, Callie realized she was basically finished for the afternoon and couldn't be more grateful that tomorrow was her day off. It had been one hell of a week and she was ready for a much needed break. Looking around her lab, seeing the files spread all over one table, the two prosthetics she'd built for the other vets from the VA trial, one for an above the elbow amputee and the other for below the knee, then of course her own model, the ortho surgeon realized that she had a little straightening up to do before she could, in good conscience, leave for the day. Pushing herself off the stool, her gaze fell upon the prototype of the left leg lying out in the open and hoped that Karev was too focused on his questions about Cayden to notice or recognize what he was looking at. She'd done her best to cut him off from venturing further into the room because she knew that he, above anyone else, would know exactly what that prototype was and who it was intended for, very much like Dr. Dettlof did. Though she was by no means ashamed of what she'd created, she couldn't risk this getting back to Arizona. Hopefully, someday, they would be in a place where they could talk about it, but right now…right now, she wasn't ready to have that conversation. She was already anxious over Arizona seeing the one she'd created for her therapist, but if she saw this…it may be too much too soon.
Deciding she didn't want to take any more chances; she carefully placed the frame in its protective case and secured it in the cabinet. Moving on to the table where all of her research was spread out, Callie collected the photos from her prospective patients and as she looked at each one again, her mind wandered to Arizona, the blisters on her legs, and the prominent limp she'd developed from being on her leg too long, and she couldn't keep herself from worrying about her. She knew Grey and Pierce took her home and she'd received a message that they stayed while she showered and they made her eat something, but she wondered if Arizona was able to sleep or if she was still in pain, and if she was, would she reach out for help if it got too bad. She briefly felt the sharp pang in her chest when she realized that even if her ex-wife did ask for help, she wouldn't be the one Arizona reached out to. Having given up the pretense that being there for Arizona was no longer her job, yet not fully accepting the fact that she wanted it to be, nor knowing how Arizona felt about it, Callie found herself in limbo. This past week she'd resorted to using their daughter as her cover, dropping her off with dinner for her mommy so they could spend time together, knowing it would cheer her up and also ensuring that she ate something halfway decent; prompting Sofia to call to say goodnight as an attempt to gauge her mood, and even sending a text on her daughter's behalf just to check in.
It was beneath her, she knew, but at the same time, she wasn't certain if they were in that place where they could call and check on each other. It was different while they were at work, they could both act under the guise that they were just supporting a colleague and happened to be getting dinner or breakfast for themselves and thought the other might appreciate it as well. Although she was slowly coming to recognize that, on her part, it was far more than just helping out a coworker and was pretty confident her ex felt the same way, whatever their excuse, she would freely admit, at least to herself, that it felt good to have that, to share that with someone else even if they were only friends. She and Penny never did anything like that and she now realized that was one of the things that was missing from their relationship, that inherent desire to take care of the other person. Sure she'd defended the resident against Meredith and Amelia, but it wasn't the same, in fact, she wasn't sure if she were defending Penny or her relationship with her. Whatever the case, it was different with Arizona, everything was different with Arizona. Callie felt the lump forming in her throat, added those thoughts to the list of things she needed to discuss with her therapist, and continued cleaning up.
When she stepped into the small bathroom in her lab to collect a clean towel to wipe down the tables, Callie took in her appearance for the first time and gasped when she realized what she looked like. Her hair was unruly, the finger combing having done nothing to tame it, her makeup was smudged, and her cheeks were red and blotchy from crying. Taking a face cloth from the cabinet, she ran it under warm water, washed her face, fixed her hair, then refreshed her eyeliner and mascara. Feeling slightly better about her appearance now, Callie left the room, looked at the clock again, then it hit her that though this was normally Arizona's day to pick Sofia up from her after school program, since it was her day off, they hadn't talked about it earlier to confirm. Knowing how exhausted she was and how much pain she was in, Callie wasn't certain if Arizona would make it and decided just to be on the safe side, she would go pick up their daughter herself. Checking her phone to see if she had received a text from her ex-wife, Callie saw that she had a voicemail from her therapist, listened to it, and groaned when he requested they postpone her early morning appointment to later in the afternoon. While calling back to confirm, she quickly packed her bag, rushed out of the lab, locked the door behind her, and raced down the hall.
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Slowly fading into consciousness, Arizona moaned in discomfort at the dull ache behind her eyes and the stiffness in her muscles. She was suddenly regretting not taking the few extra steps to her bedroom before falling asleep. Without opening her eyes, she attempted to stretch and though her muscles were screaming at her in protest, she didn't feel the sharp pain run up her spine or down her residual limb and was extremely grateful for both of those things. Finally sitting up, she rubbed the sleep from her eyes and instantly began to panic as she worried that she may have slept through her alarm, which was always set for the same time every Wednesday, and hoped she didn't miss going to pick up Sofia. Looking around for her phone, she found it lying on the floor, recognizing she was so tired she didn't even take it out of her pocket, and it must have fallen out at some point. When she checked the time, she was relieved to see that she still had an hour before she had to leave. Relaxing back against the sofa, she gave herself a few minutes to wake up and clear the sleepy haze from her mind before getting ready.
Removing the blanket from her lower half, Arizona was pleased to see that while there was still a little swelling, her leg was no longer red or overheated. Carefully massaging the kinks from the tense muscles, feeling the bandages on her upper thigh, she was reminded of Callie's suggestion that she not wear her newer leg until she could get it resized, and decided to call her prosthetist to see if he could fit her in for resizing any time soon. When she unlocked her phone to make the call, she was happy to see that Miranda had stayed true to her word and sent hourly updates. While the first couple of texts were sent by nurses and only included Cayden's stats, she laughed out loud when she saw the final text Karev sent, which happened to be a picture of a very full, very nasty looking diaper. In any normal situation, she would be disgusted, but this was a good thing, an excellent sign that Cayden was indeed progressing. Up to this point, the baby's urine output had been minimal at best and he hadn't had a bowel movement since Saturday. Though neither she nor Karev verbalized it, she knew they were both concerned about his tiny organs slowly shutting down. Sending off a quick message, she decided that she needed to get moving if she wanted to make it to the school in time to get Sofia.
Reaching for her crutches, Arizona pulled herself up, moaning just a little at the aches in her body, and made her way to her bedroom. Her first order of business was to take some ibuprofen, then to make sure she could put on her leg. Sighing in relief when it slid right on, though it was still a little tender, she proceeded to get ready. While in the bathroom washing up, she heard her phone vibrating and from the longer intervals, recognized it was a call rather than a text. Drying her face with a hand towel, she went into her bedroom and glanced at the screen before answering, hoping it was something she could ignore. When she noticed it was from Ginnie, she immediately connected the call and started apologizing profusely, "I know, I know, I missed our appointment. I'm so sorry, this has been a horrible…" She stopped midway through her ramble when her therapist interrupted, "It's okay. I'm not calling to yell at you, I heard you've had a rough week and just wanted to check-in, make sure you were okay, and see if you needed to talk before next week." Not expecting that response, Arizona plopped on the side of her bed, furrowed her brow and asked, "How, um, how did you hear about my week?" Then, instantly remembering that the appointments for the trial were on Wednesdays, she scolded, "I thought we agreed I was off limits."
Ginnie sighed, she'd debated on whether or not to fill her patient in on her earlier conversation with Callie, but her conscience got the best of her and she knew she had to tell her. Clearing her throat, she explained, "We did agree to those terms and it's not how it sounds. I went into the hospital for my fitting today and while I was in Callie's lab, which is quite impressive might I add, a gruff young man came in and asked her about how to clean some medical device. He said Robbins would have his head if he messed around and gave the baby an infection." Arizona snorted and mumbled, "Oh Karev," then remained quiet, waiting for her therapist to continue. Dr. Dettlof sat back in her chair, closed her eyes and could only see the ortho surgeon's devastated face as she continued, "After he left, she told me a little about the baby you saved and how you were all so attached to him because he reminded you of Sofia." Arizona smiled at just the thought of both children and knew it was true, though the peds staff always went above and beyond to care for their patients, very few of the other surgeons ever became as involved as they have with Cayden and she knew it was because he reminded all of them of Sofia.
She was broken from her thoughts and her breath hitched when the other woman asked, "So Cayden huh?" Arizona rubbed her hand down her face, realizing this was the real reason behind the call, and replied, "Yes, Cayden." Putting the phone on speaker, Arizona laid it on her bedside table and continued to get dressed. Now extremely worried about what was said and more importantly how Callie reacted to it, she asked, "Did she…did she say anything to you about it?" Knowing she had to be up front about the interaction, Ginnie replied, "At first, no. But I have to admit, I was thrown off by the name and without thinking, asked if you named him. I guess she could tell by the look on my face that I knew how special that name was to you and she became extremely emotional. Apparently she realized I knew; I just didn't know she knew." Arizona pulled a comfortable hoodie over her head, and explained, "She found out by accident." Recalling how upset Callie was in the chapel, Arizona's heart sank and she could think of nothing else but the pain she saw in those gorgeous brown eyes.
While she brushed her hair and applied her makeup, Arizona recapped the interaction in the chapel, then added, "We haven't had a chance to talk about it and I know it's something we can't just let go." The therapist was quiet for a moment and asked, "Are you worried about this conversation, afraid of how it will go?" The blonde picked up her phone, exhaled loudly, and replied honestly, "I'm more worried about causing more pain. It was ugly and now…well, now Callie is internalizing things, really taking them to heart, which is a good thing, but it's also a bad thing, she will obsess over it and let it eat her up inside." The older woman hummed, realizing from what she saw at least, that was already the case and suggested, "Don't wait until that happens or until the right time to talk comes. I know you and it will nag at you as well. Make the time for this Arizona. You and I both know NOT talking about things, NOT making the time to have these difficult conversations caused more harm than good."
Arizona bit her bottom lip nervously, she knew her doctor was right, she just dreaded the impending conversation, any discussion about babies really, and huffed, "I know, we are both off tomorrow, maybe I'll ask her if we can talk then." Ginnie scoffed and commanded, "There's no maybe to it Robbins, have the talk. It will be tough, but like I told Callie earlier, healing hurts like hell." Arizona snorted and retorted, "Ain't that the truth. Okay, I'll do it. You're right. I've got to run though, it's nearly time to pick up Sofia." Ginnie smiled, hoping the stubborn woman would follow through and offered, "You have my number if you need me." Arizona smiled then too and said, "Thanks for calling and checking on me. I appreciate it." After disconnecting the call and taking one last look in the mirror, Arizona rushed out the door to pick up her daughter.
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Pulling into the school parking lot, Callie realized she still had nearly thirty minutes before Sofia was released from 'activity camp' as the school called it. While there were all sorts of clubs and sports for the older kids, there was very little offered for students of Sofia's age and she begged to join. Apparently, the younger students were exposed to various activities such as sports, drama, art, and music to peak their interests and help them expand their social skills. Looking at the schedule, she noticed that today was drama and decided to go in and see if she could sneak a peak at their activity. She had to admit, she couldn't wait until her daughter got to the age that she could participate in more activities. She already knew she would be that embarrassing mom who screamed and yelled from the audience, but she didn't care as long as her daughter knew she was supported. Walking past the gym where some older kids were kicking a ball around, Callie was suddenly reminded of Miranda's words and felt a warmth wash through her when she realized that just maybe, she wouldn't be standing there alone cheering her daughter on.
Slipping into the back of the auditorium, Callie's gaze was immediately drawn to the very familiar head of blonde curls sitting a few rows up, and quietly went to join her ex-wife, hoping her presence didn't disturb her daughter's current interpretation of a butterfly flitting around the stage. Smirking, she whispered, "Is this seat taken?" Briefly taken aback by the aloof expression on Arizona's face when she turned to see who was talking to her, Callie quickly relaxed when she saw the scowl turn into a bright smile as recognition dawned in Arizona's mind, and she replied, "No not at all. Please, sit." Furrowing her brow in confusion at the blonde's initial reaction, Callie decided to let it go and sat down when Arizona quickly moved her purse and Sofia's backpack from the seat beside her. Realizing she may have seemed a bit off-putting, Arizona explained, "There's another mother, I swear, the most annoying woman you've ever met, and I'm convinced she searches me out just to tell me how amazing her daughter is." Callie chuckled at that, happy to learn the reaction had nothing to do with her presence.
Still watching the adorable rendition of 'The Very Hungry Caterpillar' playing out on stage, Arizona did her best to ignore the tingling in her right side everywhere Callie's body touched hers. Trying to take her mind off of those feelings, she whispered, "What are you doing here? I thought you worked late tonight." Callie gripped the armrest, avoiding the overwhelming urge to take Arizona's hand in hers blushed slightly and simply stated, "Backup." At Arizona's arched brow, Callie sighed and explained, "I know this is your day to pick her up, but you were so tired and in so much pain when you left this morning, I honestly didn't know if you knew what day it was. I thought of texting or calling, but I didn't want to disturb you. I finished my work early and it's been a rough week, so I decided to sneak out and come check out this club. I never get to see Sof participate." After she finished talking, Callie winced when she realized that her words could have made it sound like she didn't trust Arizona to pick up her own child and waited to be accused of just that. She was rather surprised when her ex-wife patted her hand and stated, "I appreciate that. I was pretty out of it and honestly, when I woke up, I had a moment of panic when I realized it was Wednesday and thought I missed her. I'm glad you could make it. They're fun to watch." While Callie was worried about one comment she made, Arizona was focused on another and felt a twinge of guilt about the fact that this had indeed been a rough week for her ex and though she tried not to show it, the eyes she could always read so well told her she was suffering inside. She knew then that her therapist was correct and they needed to have the conversation and soon.
The two women sat together for the next twenty minutes quietly laughing at and commenting on the behaviors of the group of five and six year olds on the stage. When it looked like things were wrapping up, Callie felt the disappointment rising in her chest as she realized that was her cue to go. They had an unspoken agreement that no matter who had Sofia, they would each pick her up from school and spend some time with her on their days off before taking her home. This allowed each of them quality time with their daughter while the other extended their hours to complete charting and take later appointments. Rubbing her sweaty palms on her jeans, Callie offered, "If it's okay, I'll stick around and say goodbye to Sof, then you can drop her off at your normal time." Confused by the suggestion, Arizona arched her brow and asked, "Why are you leaving?" Callie turned to look at her ex-wife and explained, "Uhh, well, it's umm, it's your day and I just thought you'd…" She trailed off when Arizona huffed and interjected, "Callie, that's ridiculous. We're both here and Sof would be heartbroken if you left." Biting her bottom lip nervously, Callie blurted, "What about you though, I don't want to…" Arizona held up her hand and scolded, "I want you to stay too. We promised Sof we'd do more things as a family and we usually don't get to do that except on weekends. It'll be fun, I have something special planned and you will love it." Even though those were the words that came out of her mouth, Arizona desperately wanted to say how she really felt and that was that she wanted Callie to stay simply because she did. She enjoyed her company and she'd quickly come to cherish the times they spent together as a family. She knew that might not be well received, so she stuck to the basic version of the truth and hoped her ex-wife would agree to join them.
I want you to stay too. Those words caused Callie's heart to clench, even though she knew Arizona said them in the context of spending time as a family, there was a little piece of her that hoped there was more to her words than just that. Allowing her full mega-watt smile to bloom, feeling the excitement of an impromptu family night, Callie nodded and agreed, "If your…" She was stopped once again when Arizona interjected, "If I wasn't sure, if I didn't want you to come, I wouldn't have insisted that you did." Callie nodded, murmured, "Thank you," and wasn't able to say anything else when she heard the squealed, "Mommies! You're both here." They watched as the little girl turned in circles and clapped her hands together, and Arizona leaned in and whispered in her ear, "Would you really say no to that? Look how happy she is." Turning so Arizona wouldn't see what her innocent action just did to her body, Callie scooped her daughter into her arms and answered, "We are, and guess what?" Sofia's milk chocolate eyes twinkled with excitement as she asked, "What?" Callie looked at Arizona and silently asking for and receiving permission, exclaimed, "Mommy said she had something really fun planned and asked me if I would like to join you." Sofia bumped her fist in the air and shrieked, "Yay! Family night." She then wiggled out of Callie's grasp and threw her arms around her mommy's legs. Though the blonde clearly tried to hide it, Callie saw the wince of pain and if she should ask about it later. She knew it might upset Arizona, but she cared about her health and comfort and would no longer apologize for that.
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Deciding to ride together in Arizona's car, Callie was surprised when they pulled up outside of a little pizza place and asked, "Pizza? That's your big surprise?" Arizona unfastened her seatbelt, smirked, and teased, "You'll have to wait and see." She knew both Callie and Sofia would question her choice, but on her way to the school, she texted the owner who happened to be the husband of one of her patients, and asked if today was a good day to take him up on the offer he made after she successfully removed a tumor from his unborn son's leg. Callie and Sofia looked at each other in confusion, shrugged, then followed the blonde into the clearly family own pizzeria. As soon as the bell above the door chimed, announcing their arrival, a handsome young man and equally beautiful, and extremely pregnant woman rushed to greet them. She watched as the couple took Arizona in their arms, hugged her tightly, then the woman turned, looked at her daughter and gushed, "Oh you must be Sofia! Your mommy has told us so much about you." Sofia smiled her bright smile, very reminiscent of Callie's own brilliant smile, looked to both parents and asked, "She has?" She then scrunched up her nose and asked, "Who are you?" The man chuckled, put his hand on his chest and introduced, "I am Tony and this is also Sophia, but your names are spelled differently." Sofia giggled and declared, "I've never met another Sofia before. You're pretty. Are you having a baby? Is that how mommy knows you?" Callie and Arizona both hung their heads in embarrassment at their daughter's bluntness, knowing neither of them really helped in that departments as they both often said what they were thinking, especially when they shouldn't.
The older Sophia nodded and answered, "That's exactly how your mommy got to know me. She took a bump off my baby's leg." Tony interjected, "And now she's come to collect her payment. Are you all ready?" Callie rubbed the back of her neck and asked, "Ready for what?" The man chuckled and exclaimed, "Ready to learn how to make a real Italian pizza." Arizona turned in time to see two identical sets of eyes sparkle with excitement as their matching smiles spread across their faces and replied, "Looks like they are ready to me." Sophia waved her hand at them and invited, "Follow me, we will get you all washed up, then Tony will teach you how to make our famous dough." The small family followed and Callie and Arizona watched while the young woman explained to Sofia how to wash her hands properly for food handling, covered her head with a hair net, then placed an apron over her head, adjusting the neck strap and twirling her around more than a couple of times to make sure the tie was secure around her tiny waist. When she was all finished, Sofia looked to her mommies and proclaimed, "This is just like shurgey, cept I like your hats better." Both women laughed, then proceeded to wash up and don their own aprons and hairnets.
When they got to the kitchen, Tony had a large ball of prepared dough sitting next to him on the steel countertop, however he went through the process of making the dough, explaining every step to Sofia and even asked for her assistance when adding the ingredients. Callie leaned over Arizona's shoulder and whispered, "I wish we had pictures of this." Arizona shivered at the feel of warm breath on her neck and too afraid that her voice would betray the effect that simple act had on her, reached into her pocket, took out her phone, handed it to Sophia, asked her to take pictures, then returned to the sink to rewash her hands and give her a second to settle her nerves. When she returned, Tony was helping the little girl wrap up the dough and explaining to her how they had to let it rise overnight. Glancing over at Callie who was hanging on to his every word, noting that she was enjoying this just as much as their daughter, as she knew her foodie ex-wife would, Arizona was happy she invited her along. They'd never done things like this before as a family and she knew it was a memory she would keep with her for a long time.
Looking at his guests, Tony asked, "Hand tossed, regular, or deep dish?" Without hesitation, Callie declared, "Hand tossed!" She loved all things related to cooking and though she knew she made a pretty good pizza; she had never mastered the art of tossing dough and was excited to learn. She heard Arizona's chuckle from behind her and turned to glare at her ex-wife, who was always quick to remind her of her many failed attempts. She narrowed her eyes when she heard the blonde ask, "Hey Sof, do you know that big stain on the ceiling in the kitchen?" The little girl turned to her mommy and asked, "The place where the roof leaked?" Arizona burst into a fit of giggles, earning her an elbow to the ribs and replied, "No the place where mama tried to toss pizza dough and it got stuck to the ceiling." She wanted to laugh harder when she noticed Callie was standing in front of her scowling at her with her hands on her hips and their daughter was standing behind Callie with the same stance, as she accused her brunette mother, "You lied to me?" Callie's face turned beet red and she stammered, "I uh, I didn't really lie, I just umm, I didn't want you to try it." Arizona muttered so only Callie could hear, "Because it took three days to get the damn dough out of my hair when it finally fell." No longer embarrassed, now remembering that moment fondly, Callie smiled and suggested, "Maybe Tony can teach us how to do it right."
The restaurant owners shared a knowing glance across the counter; they were both certain their doctor said she was divorced and wondered at the dynamics between the two women who clearly didn't act like a divorced couple. Sophia gathered three medium sized mesh pizza pans, laid one in front of each guest and declared, "When you are finished playing with your food, we will spread it on these pans for a little crispier crust." Arizona nodded then turned to watch Tony as he cut a decent sized ball of dough from the larger one, kneaded it a few times, then explained when you know it is time to toss the dough and demonstrated how to do it. Callie watched, enthralled in the man's actions as he tossed the dough into the air, caught it behind his back, spun it on one finger in front of him and spread it on the larger pan which was lying on the counter. As if they were watching a show, all three girls clapped when he was finished, excited to have their turn.
Tony guided each of them through the kneading process, declared their dough ready to toss, and demonstrated how to hold and twist their hands to get the perfect toss and make sure not to put any tears in the delicate crust. After a great deal of laughter at the several clumps of dough which landed on the floor, the countertop, and even on Sofia's head, they each had a crust laid out on the pan in front of them and their faces were dotted with flour and pieces of gooey dough. When it came time to add the sauce and toppings, Sofia decided to stick with what she knew and chose regular pizza sauce, shredded mozzarella, and pepperoni. She was thrilled when the older Sophia helped her turn her pizza into a happy face and watched as they put it into the large stone oven. While Arizona and Callie had more sophisticated palates and could have chosen from the large variety of sauces and ingredients, neither was surprised when they glanced over at the other's pizza and noticed they'd also stuck to their favorites and had created identical pizzas containing pepperoni, mushrooms, bacon, and sweet peppers. Smiling ruefully at one another, secretly happy to learn that some things truly did remain the same, Callie and Arizona passed their pizzas off to the real cooks, washed up, and started walking toward the table where Sophia already had their drinks waiting for them.
Once they were seated around the table, Sofia sucked on her straw, glanced around the tiny restaurant and her eyes lit up when she saw some game machines off in the corner. She popped her head up, looked at both parents, and without needing to hear their daughter's question, both women rummaged around the bottom of their purses and came up with a handful of quarters. Hopping off her chair, Sofia scraped up her coins, started to run toward the machines and stopped dead in her tracks when she heard her mommy's soft voice, "Umm, excuse me?" Hanging her head, she made her way back to the table, slowly lifted her gaze, wondering how much trouble she was in with her mommy for losing her manners, then mumbled, "Sorry. Thank you mama, thank you mommy." Callie lifted her glass to her mouth to hide her smile, slightly in awe at how Arizona's soft commanding tone caused such a strong reaction, watched as her ex-wife struggled to hide her own laughter, nodded her head and quietly stated, "Much better. Thank you. Now go have fun." When their daughter quickly scurried away, Callie leaned in and asked, "How the hell do you do that? You were always the good cop." The blonde smirked and replied, "Military born and bred, remember?" Callie laughed at that and returned, "I really need to learn how to do that. She argues with me at every turn. If I would have asked for a thank you, she would have told me that she really didn't ask for the money, I offered it." Arizona snorted and argued, "She would not!" Callie arched her brow and stated, "That child argues with me every chance she gets." At the same time, they both declared, "She's just like you!" then started laughing again.
While waiting for their pizza, Callie teasingly asked, "So you take pizza for payment now?" Arizona chuckled and replied, "No, Sophia had been told the tumor couldn't be removed until after the baby was born and it was highly likely he wouldn't walk. They decided to get a second opinion and were referred to me. She was terrified, obviously, and during her initial exam, I distracted her by telling her she shared her name with the most important person in my life, so I would take extremely good care of her. We talked about Sof and her love of pizza and they told me they own this place. Long story short, I removed the tumor before any damage was done to his bones or impeded his growth. They were so grateful, they invited me to bring Sof by so she could learn to make pizza. I figured today would be good since I'm so exhausted and we usually go to the park or walk around Pike's Place." Callie stared at Arizona unblinking. As hard as she tried, she couldn't figure out how that was even possible. She'd obviously seen Arizona operate numerous times while they were together, she'd even seen her deliver Cayden, yet the first time she'd stepped in the gallery since their divorce, was when she operated on his heart. She could never bring herself to watch Arizona perform fetal surgery, even when the whole hospital was buzzing about some groundbreaking procedure, she couldn't do it, she didn't have the right and she didn't know how it would affect Arizona to see her there. Now though, just hearing her talk about it was fascinating and befuddling at the same time.
Realizing she hadn't said anything, she finally blurted, "You can do that? You just…HOW?" Arizona was well aware that Callie had never watched her in the O.R. after she switched specialties. As hard as she tried not to, she'd always glance up into the gallery and look for those intense brown eyes staring at her, sending her silent messages, as they both had done many times throughout their relationship. In fact, the first time she'd seen her in the gallery since they split up was when she performed surgery on Cayden's heart. She wasn't sure if it was because Callie blamed her fellowship for their divorce, if she just didn't care to watch her anymore, or if she didn't think she had the right. Deciding that was a conversation for another time and rather than explain the process, she suggested, "I'm removing a sacrococcygeal tumor Friday morning, if you aren't busy, you can scrub in and see how I do it." Now excited by the prospect of seeing Arizona perform fetal surgery, without hesitation, Callie asked, "What time?" Arizona smiled, trying to ignore the thrill she felt that Callie accepted the invitation, and responded, "9:30 am." Pulling out her phone to check her schedule, Callie was happy to see that she had scheduled time in her lab until her first surgery at 11:00 am and declared, "I'll be there." The two women smiled at one another, neither saying a word and weren't sure if they were relieved for the reprieve from the seemingly intimate moment or disappointed when Tony arrived with their pizzas.
Considering herself quite the pizza connoisseur, Sofia exclaimed, "This is the best pizza I ever tasted." Callie pouted and asked, "Even better than mine?" Not wanting to hurt her mama's feelings, Sofia asked, "Can it be a tie?" Arizona feigned a cough to cover her laughter and received a glare from her ex-wife. Holding up her hands, she defended, "What? I didn't say anything!" Trying to get herself out of trouble, Sofia asked, "What's the best pizza you ever had mommy?" Arizona smiled instantly as a memory slammed into her out of nowhere and she could feel the blush rising up her cheeks. Not wanting to say what she was thinking, she deflected, "You know, I think you're right Sof, it's a tie between this pizza and mama's." Callie narrowed her eyes at the blonde, she could tell by the expression on her face she wasn't being truthful and accused, "Un huh, you're holding something back. Spill, what's the best pizza you ever had?" Arizona knew she was caught and while she could very well lie, she decided she wasn't in the least bit embarrassed, she just didn't know how Callie would receive her response. Finally relenting, she tried to put it in extremely vague and PG terms and answered, "I think the best pizza I ever had was that place we ordered from after Alex and Izzie's wedding." Callie wanted to kick herself for pushing, as images she couldn't unsee, flashed before her eyes and before she knew what she was saying or how it sounded, she agreed, "Oh, that was definitely some amazing pizza, the best." Once again the two women found themselves staring at each other, both recalling the same night, neither sure how to move on from that conversation without being too awkward.
Thankfully, oblivious to her parents' dilemma, Sofia only caught on to one thing and asked, "Uncle Alex was married before?" Broken from their spell, both women returned their attention to their daughter and couldn't help but laugh at the surprised look on her face. After explaining the brief marriage in terms their daughter would understand, they mutually decided to move on to safer topics and asked about Sofia's day. After they were finished, Tony and Sophia boxed up their leftover pizza and surprised them each with their own cannoli to take home for dessert. After they refused to take even a partial payment, Callie walked to the counter where a tip jar sat near the register and stuffed some bills into it and proclaimed, "Buy your baby boy something nice." She then strolled back to the table, picked up the boxes, and followed her family out the door, all the while noticing Arizona's slight limp. Given how long she wore her leg without taking a break and the blisters she'd seen a couple of nights before, she was extremely concerned. She just didn't know if she could voice that concern.
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Once they were all settled in the car and on their way back to the school so Callie could get her car, Arizona felt Callie's eyes on her and out of her peripheral vision could see both the concern and the internal struggle she was experiencing, on her face. She was almost certain she'd noticed her limping and was concerned about her; she was also absolutely positive she wouldn't ask about it out of fear of getting her head snapped off. They'd come a long way and she'd even asked Callie to help her with her leg the other night, but her ex-wife did a very poor job of hiding the shock she felt by that request. She knew this was all her doing and the best she could do at this point was try to undo it. Glancing at her ex-wife, Arizona volunteered, "My leg is giving me some trouble. Obviously I wore it too long and didn't give it much of a break. It was feeling better after I woke up, but I can feel it swelling and pinching." Callie sat quietly for a moment and reflected not only on the fact that Arizona just shared this information with her, but also how she'd asked her for help the other day, and even when she told her she could ask about her running blade. She understood that this was her ex-wife's way of trying to fix her past mistakes, of allowing her into that private world she'd built around herself where the leg was concerned, and giving her permission to ask about it, to talk about it.
Knowing Arizona knew how to take care of herself and not wanting to offer unsolicited advice, she asked, "Do you have anything pressing to do tomorrow? Will you be able to take a break from wearing it?" Slightly surprised Callie didn't tell her to ice it or how to take care of it or even offer to come over and take a look at it, Arizona realized, possibly for the first time since her amputation, the many times Callie asked those exact same questions, she wasn't trying to be her doctor, she was asking out of concern, she didn't want her wife to be in pain. Now, even though they were divorced, she was still concerned, she still didn't want her to be in pain. Just like she didn't want Callie to be in pain, physically nor emotionally. Seeing this as her opening, she replied, "I do have something pressing I'd like to do, but I can still stay off my leg. That is…umm…are you busy tomorrow?" Surprised by the question, Callie shook her head and replied, "I had a therapy appointment in the morning, but he rescheduled it for later in the afternoon. Did you…" She trailed off when she realized Arizona's intent and waited for her to extend the invitation. Arizona kept her eyes on the road and lowered her voice so Sofia wouldn't hear and explained, "I promised you we would talk soon and aside from taking care of Cayden…the patient, I haven't really been able to focus on anything else but that. I don't want to brush this aside." Arizona could feel her heart pounding in her ears, waiting for Callie's response. Maybe she wanted to talk to her therapist before they had this conversation.
Callie's breath hitched at Arizona's admission. She could feel her heart racing and her palms getting sweaty, she knew they needed to talk, she needed to talk, to get things off her chest, to ask questions she had never asked before, questions she realized she desperately needed answers to. She opened her mouth to agree, when Arizona nervously added, "Unless…I mean, if you aren't ready or maybe you want to talk to your therapist first, I just…I don't want to pressure you but I also…" She stopped and her own breath hitched when she felt a firm hand on her thigh as Callie soothed, "No, I mean yes, I would like to come over and talk about it. I don't want to…well, do what we did…I did… before. I don't want to ignore it." Arizona sighed, covered the hand on her thigh, gave it a tight squeeze, and corrected, "You were right the first time, we both did it, we both ignored it." She then returned her hand to the steering wheel and Callie removed her hand from her leg, both of them feeling the loss of the other's touch and trying their best not to wonder why.
It was a little after 6:00 pm when Arizona pulled into the parking lot of the school. While Callie was transferring her and Sofia's pizza boxes and cannoli to her car, Arizona helped Sofia out of the back seat and smiled when her daughter threw her arms around her, and exclaimed, "That was so much fun mommy. Thank you for taking me to make pizza." She then turned to Callie and asked, "Did you have fun mama?" Callie ran her finger's through soft brown curls and replied, "I had a great time, little miss." She then looked at Arizona and proclaimed, "It was really fun, thank you for letting me tag along." Arizona smiled and responded genuinely, "I'm happy you agreed to come. I knew you would enjoy it." She looked at Sofia, wiped some flour off her ruddy tan cheek and said, "It looks like a bath night for you little one. Give me a kiss and I'll see you tomorrow night." She then bent down and as was their habit, they rubbed their noses together and Arizona said, "I love you forever," then they turned their cheeks, gave each other butterfly kisses with their eyelashes, and Sofia replied, "I love you for always." After one more hug, Sofia ran to her mama's car and got into the back seat.
Arizona stood with her hands in her pockets and anxiously asked, "Um, so when is a good time for you?" Callie nibbled on her bottom lip and replied, "I can come over after I drop Sofia off. I pass the bakery you like; I can bring the donuts if you have the coffee ready." Arizona smiled brightly, popping her dimples and answered, "Oh, you know I will never turn down donuts. Just text me when you're on your way." Callie nodded in agreement, and replied, "Will do." She started to walk toward her car, turned back to see Arizona slowly lowering herself into the driver's seat and suggested, "If you need anything…um, before tomorrow, you can text or call. I'm here." Feeling a warmth wash over her, Arizona smiled softly and replied, "I know you are and thank you. I'll see you in the morning." Callie smiled, and returned, "Goodnight Arizona." As they each drove away, even though they were anxious over what tomorrow would bring, they couldn't help but feel that somehow this little family outing brought them a tiny bit closer.
A/N: Thank you all for your reviews and your patience. The school year is over and my creative juices are flowing once again. I thought we needed a little fluff before the heavy conversation. I promise I won't leave you hanging as long.