Previously on Calamitous Intervention

Right before Luz opened the portal door, a powerful wave of calamity energy disrupted it and resulted in her being transported to Amphibia instead, and vice-versa for Anne. How will they adapt to these worlds? Find out now.

Chapter Two - A Lying Witch and a Warden

Anne, in a strange tent, heard a female voice and flinched before approaching the source of it. "Hello?"

She peeked and saw an owl placing a bag on a table in front of an older woman. "Now let's see what we've got here..." She screwed the owl onto the staff, shocking Anne. The lady rummaged through the random junk Anne recognized as human stuff. She took out a phone and tossed it aside. "Garbage, garbage..." She also tossed aside a ring and golden chalice, which was pretty valuable, so Anne didn't know why this random woman would discard things like this.

The woman gasped, picking up a pair of silly glasses and putting them on. "Now this... This will make me rich. And this..." She then took out a book labeled, "The Good Witch Azura".

Looks like something Marcy would enjoy, Anne thought, as the woman raised the book up to a candle next to her. "Oh, this will make good kindling." The book caught on fire and Eda dropped it to the ground, letting it burn.

After seeing this person's weird display, Anne finally decided to say something. "Hey! What the heck?!" This surprised the woman. Anne leaned down and picked up the phone she tossed, which was cracked now. "This was a perfectly good phone!"

The older woman spoke. "And just who the heck are you, rummaging through my stuff?" She walked up to Anne threateningly, towering over her. Anne stepped back, prepared to fight if she had to. "Hey! I don't know where the heck I am, cause the last thing I remember is NOT being here." She then looked around and saw that this was definitely not Earth.

She took another step back from the woman. "Did I end up in H E double hockey sticks?!"

"You wish," the woman replied, as she twirled her finger, and Anne felt herself lunge forward on a stool right in front of the lady. Anne sweated nervously, freaking out about her magical powers. "Well, if I wasn't dead before, I sure am now. Eaten by a magic crazy old lady."

"Eat you? Why would I eat... a potential customer?" The lady said, her tone completely shifting.

Anne raised an eyebrow at this, as the lady picked up a green croc. "Can I offer you a human foot filled with holes?" She set it down and grabbed a stick of deodorant. "A bar of green human candy?" Anne watched her show these items, and despite the terrifying feeling she just had, she laughed.

"Oh, oh! How about this black shadow..." The older lady's smile faded. "Alright, what's so funny, kid?"

Anne got up, grabbing the Croc. "I think you need to be educated on what human stuff actually does. This is something you wear on your foot." She picked up the deodorant. "You apply this to your armpits, and this..."

She walked up to the Human Candy! (?), grabbed some batteries, and put them into the T.V., showing an old exercise video. "... is a television." People from the street noticed the video and walked up to see the TV.

"Huh?"

"What's that?"

"The sound... It's so alluring."

One of them held up some bills that look like money. "I'll pay forty snails for the screaming box!"

"I'll give you a hundred!"

"Can I eat the tiny person inside?"

By then, a whole crowd formed around them, and the woman glanced at Anne, smirking. "What did you say your name was?"

"I'm Anne Boonchuy," Anne replied.

The older woman snatched the money out of the crowd's hands, taking advantage of this opportunity. "Well, Anne, that was pretty clever... for a human."

"Yep, figured you weren't human after seeing that," Anne replied, crossing her arms.

"I'm Eda the Owl Lady, the most powerful witch on the Boiling Isles!" the lady stated. Anne took a step back, surprised. "A witch? Man, Marcy would kill to be here right now."

"I am a respected, feared-" Eda continued, before a guard's fist smashed the T.V., dispersing the crowd. "Busted!" He held up Eda's wanted poster. "Eda the Owl Lady, you are wanted for misuse of magic and demonic misdemeanors." He grabbed Eda's arm. "You are hereby ordered to come with me to the Conformatorium."

Eda yanked her arm back, scowling at him. "Would you guys quit following me around? I haven't done squat."

"And you're coming too for fraternizing with a criminal!" The guard stated, grabbing Anne's arm. In retaliation, Anne kicked his shin, making him let go. "Let me go, you creep!"

The guard hopped on one foot, grunting. "Why, you little-!"

Eda reached under the table and grabbed her staff, swinging it and nailing the guard in the face, knocking him away. She then spun her staff and tapped it on the table, making all of her stuff float.

"Whoops, can't forget this," she said, as she pulled a key from her hair, pressing her finger to the eye. Immediately, a door Anne hadn't noticed before folded up into the shape of a briefcase and flew toward the witch, who took it. "Huh... Did this thing always have cracks in it?"

She decided to worry about it later. She wrapped everything in a bag and ran off, calling out to Anne. "Follow me, human!"

Anne watched her run off, and she didn't really want to trust this lady, but she might've been able to help find Sasha and Marcy, so she reluctantly followed her close behind. "You're telling me there's been a world of magic all this time?! There's no way I'll survive for long here!"

"Ha! I won't let 'em hurt you," Eda assured her. "A human like you is much more valuable to me alive than dead."

"You're really making it hard to trust you!" Anne replied as Eda pulled her onto her staff, taking off into the sky. "WHOAA!"

The guard got up and saw Eda getting away. He raised a fist in the air. "You won't get away with this, Owl Lady!" He paused for a moment before looking down at his hands. "Yeah, all right. You did. You got away with it. She got away with it, everybody! Typical." He walked away.

Anne remained completely stiff, wishing this was all a dream. "So, let me get this straight. You're a witch in a world full of weird creatures slash monsters slash demons. What's wrong with this place?!"

"This is the Boiling Isles," Eda explained. "Every myth you humans have is caused by a little of our world leaking into yours."

Winged demons fly close by as Eda talks, including a griffin. "Okay, but this isn't where I belong."

Eda landed the staff and got off, but her hand stayed behind. Anne yelped when she saw it move on its own. "Oops." Eda grabbed it, screwing it back on. "That happens sometimes."

"I need to find Sasha and Marcy if they're here," Anne told her, "and get home to someplace that isn't... this."

"Only if you help me first," Eda replied, chuckling. "Now, come along, human."

"My name's Anne, not Human," Anne reminded her, but she ignored it. The two approached the front door of a big house. "

"The first normal place I've been to since arriving here," Anne said. "How will this protect you against those weirdo guards?"

"Don't worry," Eda reassured her. "My house has a state-of-the-art defense system."

Anne then noticed an owl... head... thingy on the front door.

"Hoot, hoot! Password, please," the owl requested, but Eda poked his eyes with his two fingers, making him grunt. "We got no time for this, Hooty. Let us in."

"That thing's alive?!" Anne said, taken aback.

"All right, all right! Geez!" Hooty said, scowling at Eda. "You never want to have any fun! Ow! Hoot!"

Hooty opened his mouth wide enough for them to walk through. Anne followed Eda in and he then closed his mouth, letting out a burp as if he ate them (which he probably did).

"Welcome to..." Eda snapped her fingers. "... the Owl House."

Candles lit up, a fire ignited in the fireplace, a cauldron stirred itself, and a broom began sweeping the floor. Anne watched and coughed into her hand. "Show off."

Eda squinted at her. "What was that?" Anne fake coughed again. "Just had something in my throat."

The witch decided to ignore this, for Anne's sake. "Anyway, this is where I hide away from the pressures of modern life. Also, the cops. Mmm, also ex-boyfriends."

"I have to admit, this place is pretty dope," Anne said, looking around. "Sooo... Is it just you and the owl thing?"

"Actually, I have a roommate," Eda told her. Suddenly, tremors shook the house as Anne heard a deep voice. "Who dares intrude upon I..." The voice then got higher pitched. "... the king of demons?!" He squeaked his rubber ducky. In front of her was some sort of skull dog thing, but she didn't care.

Her eyes turned into puppy eyes as she squealed, running over and picking him up. "Ohhh! Baby precious! What's his name?"

"It's 'King'," Eda said.

King tried to break out of her grip. "No! I'm not your baby precious! Eda, who is this monster?!"

Anne remembered a trick to get Domino, her cat, to calm down since she did this when she was a stray. She decided to try it on the furry creature by scratching the lower part of his back in a certain way.

King tried to keep struggling but found himself unable to. His arms and legs went limp. "Eda, you didn't tell me she was the best scratcher."

Eda chuckled at this, before picking up King from Anne's arms and setting him on the ground. His legs felt like jelly from the scratching, and he was unable to stand for a moment. "Why did she have to stop?"

"Because she's here to help us with our little... situation," Eda explained to him. "This is Anne, the human."

"Oh, hooray!" was King's reply. Anne frowned. "Uh, what kind of situation are we talking about here? Cause if it's graffiti, or stealing from thrift stores, I'm not doing that."

"That's oddly specific, but I'll explain," Eda replied. She drew a spell circle in mid-air and showed them King's backstory. "King was once a mighty king of demons until his Crown of Power was stolen, and he became... this."

Anne looked at King, then back at Eda. "And I'm supposed to believe that? Look at him, he's like a little puppy!"

"I am not!" King said, stomping his foot. "I am the king of demons, and you will not dare disrespect me!"

Eda continued. "The crown is being held by the evil Warden Wrath and locked away behind a magical force field that only a human can break through. A human like you. If you help us retrieve his crown, we'll send you back to your realm. So whaddya say? Plus..."

She picked up King by his head and wiggled him around. "Who could say no to this cute face?" Anne squealed again in response.

"No!" King cried out. "Please don't encourage her!" Eda dropped him, and he landed with a "Nyeh!"

"I mean, we're kinda your only way home," the witch reminded her, and Anne groaned. "Something tells me there are no other options here..."

"Nope," Eda confirmed. "Now, we've got no time to lose." She picked up Anne and tossed her over her shoulder, leaving the house. Anne tried to get out of her grip, grunting. "Hey! I can walk on my own!"

King watched before going over and picking up his rubber ducky. "Soon, Mister Ducky, we shall drink the fear of those who mocked us!" He yelled out, before following the pair.

Anne gave up trying to get Eda to let her go. "Fine, so where are we going?"

"Somewhere super fun," Eda told her, and Anne sighed. "I should've just stayed home."

Later, they arrived at the Conformatorium, with thunder booming from above. King was riding on Anne's bushy hair. "The Conformatorium, a place for those considered unsuitable for society," Eda stated.

"Now I know a good home for Maggie," Anne muttered, and she noticed a wanted poster of Eda on the wall. "So you guys are criminals here?"

"Yep. But we were never caught because we're too slippery," Eda replied, smirking.

"Try to catch me when I'm covered in grease," King said. "I'm a squirmy little fella" He slipped off Anne's head, grunting, but Anne caught him, setting him down. King turned toward her. "You and I will sneak up to the top of the tower where they're holding my crown."

"And I'm gonna make sure the warden's distracted," Eda added.

"Shouldn't I wear some sort of cloak or disguise?" Anne asked. "Being a criminal here is not on my to-do list."

"You'll be fine," Eda told her. "Well, as long as you aren't caught."

"That's reassuring," Anne said sarcastically. Eda tapped her staff on the ground and a glowing platform materialized under Anne and King. "Hold on tight." It then rose, floating up to a window in the tower.

Out of nowhere, it disappeared, and Anne yelped, managing to grab the edge of the window. King nearly fell but took hold of her foot. Anne looked down and saw one of her shoes falling far down. "My shoe!"

Eda threw her staff and sat down, letting it catch her and take her away. "Meet you guys at the top of the tower!"

King climbed up Anne's back, making grunts. "Aww, even your grunts are cute."

"No, they're not!" King climbed up through the window and Anne followed him, landing on her feet. The two of them looked to see rows upon rows of prison cells. Indistinguishable figures occupied each of them. "Wow, and I thought actual prison was bad."

"Hey, bushy hair," a female voice said behind them. Anne turned around to see a young witch with black hair and a ponytail, dark skin, and pointy ears. Her name is Katya. "How'd you get out of your cell?"

"Not from here," Anne replied. "Also not my choice to even be here in the first place. Also not a criminal."

"Not yet, you're not," King chimed in.

"Neither are we," Katya replied. "The stupid warden likes to lock people up who don't fit in. Like, I write fanfics of food falling in love."

She pulled out a book. "I like food, I like love. Just let me write about it!"

Anne decided to bite her tongue as another prisoner with more than two eyes chimed in. "I'm here because I like eating my own eyes." He plucked one of his eyes out of its socket, swallowing it. Immediately, it reappeared back in its socket.

"How does that even work?" Anne asked, actually kind of impressed, but the prisoner shrugged.

"We are agents of fwee expwession!" A smaller figure with a big nose and reddish hair protested. Her name is Tinella Nosa. "They will never siwence us!"

"Yeah, she's really big into conspiracy theories," Katya added.

"The world is a simulation! We are but playthings for a higher being!" Tinella cried out, and Anne shuddered at this, hoping the little demon never discovered Facebook. "Well, you guys never really did any actual crimes, so this warden guy seems like a real jerk."

Katya was about to reply, but they heard loud footsteps, and she called out to Anne. "It's Warden Wrath! Hide!"

Anne decided to take her advice and ran into the nearest cell with King. She knew Muay Thai, but she didn't think that would really help her in this place.

"I can hear you," a deep voice bellowed, pushing open a door. "Just what are you fools whispering about?"

He walked up and saw a wanted poster of Eda laying on the ground. "Ah. The Owl Lady." He picked up the poster before crumpling it. His fist morphed into a hammer and slammed on the door of Anne's cell.

"I'll get my hands on her soon enough," he stated, turning toward Anne and King huddled in the cell.

Tinella Nosa decided to break the silence. "Fight against the oppwessor! We will wesist! We will conquer! We will never be afwaid of you, you old cweep!"

Wrath went up to her cell and opened it, and she cheered. "Hooway! I'm fwee!" Suddenly, he violently grabbed her, with his huge fist completely wrapping around her. "Let this be a lesson to all of you. There's no place in society for you if you can't fit in."

He walked away, grabbing another wanted poster of Eda off the wall and crushing it. He slammed the door behind him, leaving the four of them alone once again.

"What a jerk!" Anne growled, getting up. "Is this what kind of government this world has? That's depressing."

"You have no idea," Katya told her. Anne left her cell and pulled the lever up, releasing Katya.

"I... Thanks, kid," Katya told her, as the two helped free the others.

"Just go!" Anne told them. "Go before you're caught!"

They looked at each other and reluctantly ran off. Anne ran down a hallway, where Eda flew up to her, jumping off her staff. "Hey, I just checked. The warden is distracted, tormenting some tiny creature. He won't be coming around here anytime soon."

"Yeah, I feel bad for that tiny demon though," Anne replied, walking forward. Eda followed Anne and the two of them ended up in front of a huge door labeled, "CONTRABAND".

Seeing this, King got excited. "My crown! It's close! I can sense its power!" He ran up to the doorknob and tried to open it with his tiny body.

Eda smiled. "Aw, he gets so cute when he's thirsty for power." Anne managed to suppress the urge to squeal again before composing herself. "Well, what about the other prisoners? We can't just leave them here with that jerk."

"Eh, they'll be fine," Eda replied, as King finally managed to open the door. He laughed as he ran in, looking for his crown.

"Come on, before he hurts himself," Eda said, as the two followed him into a huge yet mostly empty room, hearing a zap and an "Ow!". In the middle of it was a giant pillar of green light.

King rubbed his head and tried again, before ramming himself into the pillar again, but it sent him back.

"We have a human, remember?" Eda reminded him, placing a hand on the furry creature's back.

"Oh, yeah," King remembered.

"This still seems terribly convenient, but sure," Anne said as she walked through the pillar. Inside it, she saw piles of random junk. At the top of it, she saw a crown, and her jaw dropped. "Wait, you're telling me he's actually a king?"

She then climbed up and got a closer look, the surprise on her face wearing off. "You gotta be kidding me." She picked it up and walked out of the pillar. It had the label "Burger Queen" on it, a place Anne sometimes went to when sneaking off from school. Upon seeing it, King leaped up in glee. "My crown!"

Anne silently handed it over, and King placed it on his head, laughing. "Yes. Yes! I can feel my powers returning!" He pointed to a pink stuffed rabbit with one missing button eye. "You there. Nightmare critter." He picked it up, raising it in the air. "I shall call you Francois, and you shall be a minion in my army of darkness! Ha ha!"

"As adorable as that is... WHY THE HECK DID YOU MAKE ME DO THIS POINTLESS QUEST?! Burger Queen isn't even that good!" Anne yelled out. Eda raised her finger. "Shhh, not so loud." King looked over, wondering what the commotion was about, but quickly lost interest.

Eda sighed, muttering to Anne. "Okay, fine, it doesn't give him any powers. Look at us, Anne. King and I don't have much in this world. We only have each other. So if that dumb crown is important to him, it's important to me. And besides, us weirdos have to stick together, you know?"

Anne couldn't help but smile at this, and Eda walked over, preparing her staff. "Well, we owe you one. Now, let's get out of here before the warden finds us and loses his head."

"Too late," a deep voice said behind her, as Wrath's hand turned into a blade, and he swung it, decapitating the Owl Lady. Her head flew over and Anne caught it, screaming at the top of her lungs. "TRAUMA!"

Suddenly, the head grunted. "Ow! Oh, I hate it when that happens."

Anne's face turned pale at this. "What is even going on anymore?"

"Calm down, kid," Eda's head told her. "This just happens when you get older."

"No, it doesn't!" Anne replied. "That is not normal!"

"Finally, I have you cornered, Eda the Owl Lady," Warden Wrath said triumphantly. He took King's crown, making him look up. "Weh?"

"My guards could never get you," the warden said, "but I knew if I took your pet's toy, you'd come running." He crushed the crown, and King cried out. "No! My power!" He fell to his knees, saddened.

Seeing this got Anne even angrier as Eda talked back at him. "What do you want with me? I've never actually broken any of your stupid laws... in front of you."

"I want you... to go out with me," the warden stated, pulling out a bouquet of flowers.

"Wha...?"

"Go, boss!" The other guards shouted, cheering their boss on. Wrath continued. "You've always eluded our capture. You've always been the one who got away. I found that... alluring."

Anne immediately cut in, walking forward and clenching her fists. From her backpack, she grabbed her tennis racket. "Never figured the evil Warden Wrath for a hopeless romantic."

"You stay out of this!" he yelled, trying to grab Anne, but she moved out of the way. "First, you capture these people who did nothing wrong..." Another tentacle went to grab her, but she smacked it away with her tennis racket.

"Second, you decapitate Eda, and third..." She looked up, her eyes flashing blue for a split second. "You made this whole mission pointless and upset my little angel."

"Not your little angel!" King yelled, but she ignored him.

The warden sent more tentacles, but she leaped past them and whacked Wrath in the head with her tennis racket with surprising strength, and he fell to the ground.

Eda was taken aback by it, but she chuckled. "Nice!"

A few guards approached Eda's head to capture her, but she grabbed their hoods and dragged them down to their eyes to block their sight for a moment.

"Alright, we're getting outta here!" Anne yelled as she ran forward, picking up Eda's head. Eda's body freed King from one of the guard's grasp, and they all mounted the staff.

"Go!" Anne yelled, and the staff took off. Shortly after, Warden Wrath got up on his feet and growled. "Owl Lady, I won't let you get away again!"

His arms morphed into tentacles, and he used them to pursue them quickly. Anne, Eda, and King flew across the hallway of cells as the warden quickly caught up to them. They exited the Conformatorium and began to plummet down.

Wrath hit their staff with some tentacles, knocking them down to the ground. He stopped in front of them, morphing his hand into a blade.

"Ow, my bones!" King grunted, as Eda picked up her head and reattached it. "Anne, go back to the human world." She grabbed the portal key from her hair and placed it in Anne's hand before running toward the warden.

"I can't just leave you guys!" Anne replied. "I want to go home, but not at the cost of your lives!"

"If you think this guy is bad, you shoulda seen her last boyfriend!" King told her.

"Not my boyfriend," Eda grumbled. She quickly grabbed King and leaped next to Anne to avoid Wrath's attack. "Go! Go!"

"No," Anne replied. "I don't like this place, but you guys helped me and let me enter your home. I'm not leaving you behind."

Warden Wrath took off his mask to reveal a huge mouth covering the majority of his face. He breathed fire toward them. Eda leaped to the side and drew two spell circles to catch the fireball and launch it back at him.

It hit him, and he grunted, being sent into the wall. Anne ran forward, despite Eda's protests, and she yelled, seeing the warden getting up and roaring, morphing his hands into blades, and running toward her.

He swung at her, and she barely was able to dodge his attack. "Too close for comfort!" She swung her racket at him again, making him stumble back for a moment.

Wrath was about to slice her, but a fireball hit him from the side, staggering him. Anne took this chance to gain some distance, going back to Eda.

"That was reckless, kid," the Owl Lady said, "but nice job."

"No more running away, Owl Lady," Wrath said, coming up to them. "Today I capture you once and for all!"

King whined, hiding his face in Eda's chest. Anne panted, standing in front of them to protect them. "Got any more pickup lines for Eda, big guy?"

In response, he growled and was about to attack, but suddenly, three figures grabbed Warden Wrath and pushed him away. Anne's eyes widened when she realized who they were. "Those are the prisoners I freed!"

The Eye-Eating Prisoner shoved the warden. "I eat my own eyes!"

Tinella Nosa ran behind him and tripped him with her body. "I think the world is a twiangle!" Wrath grunted, falling on his back. Katya got on top of him, holding him down. "And I practice the ancient art of fanfiction!"

The three of them held Wrath down and the eye-eating prisoner tied his tentacle arms together before flipping him on his stomach. "Ugh! You! Who do you think you are?!"

Anne walked up to him, bringing back her fist. "I am Anne Boonchuy, and you have made a huge mistake fighting us!" Her eyes flashed blue for a second again, as he punched him with full force, completely knocking him out cold.

The other prisoners cheered at this, and Anne walked up to Katya, smiling. "Thanks for helping me. What's your name?"

"It's Katya," Katya replied. "We couldn't just leave you to die after you freed us."

"That was actually one of her better breakups," King said.

"Not a breakup," Eda grumbled. "Anyway, let's bounce before any more monsters fall in love with me." The three got on the staff and flew away from the Conformatorium, heading back home.

Back in the Owl House, Eda leaned her staff on the couch, walking up to Anne. "Well, a deal's a deal. Let's get you home." She snapped her finger and the portal key flew out of Anne's pocket into Eda's hand.

The witch pressed the eye and the portal door unfolded itself. Anne walked up to it, smiling, before looking back at Eda and King. King frowned and looked down at the ground, saddened to see her leave.

Anne walked up to King and picked him up, hugging him tightly and kissing him on the head. "Goodbye, King, Eda. Thanks for helping me."

She then paused, looking at the portal door again. "I'm just... concerned if Sasha and Marcy are also here. I can't just leave them behind." She frowned. "My parents must be worried sick about me."

She turned toward them, smiling. "Sorry, Eda, but forget about leaving. I need to find my friends. Is it alright if I stay here for the time being?"

Eda blinked in surprise, before King chimed in. "Let her stay!" He then whispered into her ear. "She can make us snacks."

"I heard that," Anne replied. "Look, I won't be a total freeloader. I do work at a restaurant back home so I can make some meals. After all, I'm not even sure I can eat what you guys can eat."

Eda smiled and picked up King. "Well, I could use a hand keeping this goofball out of the cupboards. All right, but how do you plan to survive without any magic?"

Anne pondered this. "Well, maybe I could learn a few spells or something. Plus, I do have some experience in martial arts. Can't be that bad."

After this, she went up to her room and found a spare sleeping bag. She unrolled it, laying down on it. She sighed, looking over at her backpack. "That music box never came with me. I guess I'll have to rely on that portal door. Maybe one of the girls has it."

She heard somebody clearing their throat and looked over to see King holding Francois. "Your sleep cocoon looks fluffy."

Anne smiled, gesturing for him to come over and he did, curling up below her feet and closing his eyes. She looked at her phone to see a bunch of text messages from her mom saying, "Anne Are you okay?", "Where are you?!", and "You're late to the party!"

She looked saddened, but texted her mom back. "I'm Fine, but you wouldn't believe where I am right now"

Anne set her phone down and turned to her side, closing her eyes and falling asleep.

To Be Continued in Chapter Three

It's going to take some time to get used to making chapters this long since I've gotten used to only 3,200-3,500 words in my other fanfictions, but each chapter will count for one entire episode.

~ Scruffy