*Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles franchise.
*Author's Notes: I'm finally back with a new chapter of 'Slash's Revenge' and it's another dramatic one. I hope everybody's ready for a bit of angst…
Okay, I don't want to make all of you wait any longer for this long overdue update, so let's just jump right in, shall we? Thank you very, very much for reading, everyone! (ᴖᴗᴖ)
CJ
Chapter 21 – Irreparable Damage
"DONNIE!"
Though it was only a split second, an eternity seemed to pass as Raph frantically rushed towards the ledge of the building his younger brother had just toppled over. Then, the gut-wrenching sound of Donatello crying out for help abruptly came to a stop, right along with Raphael's momentum and his erratically beating heart.
No! No! No! No!
He can't be... gone.
He can't! He just can't!
Scared to death of what he might see if he were to look down, the hotheaded turtle just froze in place, mouth ajar, as he stared at his outstretched hand. The very same hand that had tried and failed to grab hold of his brother right before he had plunged off the rooftop.
Visions of Donatello's already battered body splayed out on the sidewalk below, lifeless and broken, made it impossible for Raph to move. It was even harder for him to breathe. He felt as if someone had filled his lungs with quick-setting cement.
Hoarsely whimpering out his younger brother's name, Raphael sealed his eyelids tightly together, but it did nothing to shut out the pain or the sound of his brother's voice inside his head...
"It's too late, Raph. I'm already gone."
"This is all your fault, Raph! Slash isn't the monster! YOU are!"
Though the words had come straight out of a nightmare, they were still unerringly true. This was all Raphael's fault. All the pain and suffering his family had had to endure. Every awful thing that Slash had done to Donatello. And now... this!
All of it was Raphael's fault.
He was responsible for his own brother's –
He couldn't bring himself to complete the thought. Not without totally losing it.
"NO! Donnie, say something! Anything! Please!"
The silence that followed Raphael's heartfelt plea was more painful than anything he had ever experienced before.
It was a voiceless confirmation that his brother was actually –
A strangled-sounding gasp cut through the damp, night air; almost like Raphael was gagging on his own breath.
What was he going to tell his family?
How could he tell his family?
And how could he ever live with himself after what he'd done?
He couldn't.
"I'm sorry, Donnie. I'm so, so sorry." Raphael's knees were just about to buckle together when he heard a wicked cackle coming from behind him. One that he would recognize anywhere.
Suddenly, it was like there was blistering-hot lava surging through the red-clad ninja's veins and he was about to burst into flames. All the grief he was feeling inside immediately transformed into pure hatred. Pure hatred for the vile turtle now pitilessly laughing at him. Mocking his pain…
Clenching his hands into trembling fists, Raphael spun on his heels, fully intent on striking down his now most-loathed enemy, but what the hotheaded turtle saw instantly rendered him paralyzed, again.
Another gasp sounded out as Raph attempted to draw air into lungs that still refused to cooperate. For several agonizing seconds, all the red-masked turtle could do was stare straight ahead, not sure whether or not he was just seeing things because he was in shock.
Across from the building where Raphael stood, dazed and confused, a massive, spiked mutant stood, tall and proud. In one hand, the giant turtle held onto a familiar-looking grappling hook. In his other, he clung to an unconscious figure dangling limply at his side.
"D – Donnie?" That one, whisper-soft word perfectly conveyed both the distress and newfound hope Raph was feeling inside as he stared wide-eyed at the two turtles before him. Then, it finally dawned on him that his younger sibling was out cold. The temperamental brother couldn't help but to wonder why.
Anger once again bubbled to the surface.
Had Donatello passed out?
Had he cracked his head on something on the way down?
Had Slash not grabbed him in time?
A hundred and one questions popped into Raphael's head as he continued to stare at his brother's seemingly motionless form. Each scenario grew darker than the previous one, making Raph fear the worst. But as the turtle in red started to draw closer, he could see that his brother's body was trembling. While this sight came as a huge relief, it also made the hotheaded warrior's resentment towards Slash burn that much brighter.
"WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM?!" It was more of a demand than an actual question. Raphael stomped across the remainder of the rooftop so that only the gap between the two buildings separated he and Slash. Just close enough to see the droll little smirk playing on Slash's face, but Raph was more concerned about the fact that Donatello hadn't budged. The largest mutant was lugging the wounded turtle around without an ounce of caution while Donnie just hung there as though he was a wet rag.
"Do to him? Ha! If it weren't for me, your brother'd be splattered like a bug on a windshield!"
As if the mental image of Donnie being 'splattered' wasn't disturbing enough, Slash had to go and use a 'bug' reference, making Raphael's flesh crawl.
"Just let him go, Slash!"
Peering down over the ledge of the rooftop, Slash's smirk grew even wider and his beady eyes lifted to give Raphael a vindictive wink. "You really want me to let him go?"
This made Raph's muscles go rigid as haunting memories of Slash threatening to drop Mikey from a rooftop came flooding back. Somehow, the current situation seemed even more horrifying than that first encounter with Slash. Perhaps that was because Raphael now fully understood what a coldblooded monster his former pet truly was.
"Please, Slash! Please, don't hurt him anymore!"
As if on cue, the rain started to descend once again, perfectly camouflaging the single tear that rolled down Raphael's cheek, but it couldn't hide the sorrow etched on his face or the telltale quiver in his voice. Something Slash was utterly relishing in.
"And why shouldn't I? Huh? Hurting him hurts you, after all. And you deserve nothing but pain after what you did to me!"
"Maybe I do, but Donnie doesn't! He's dying, Slash! Can't you see that?"
"Wh – What?" It was the same exact word that Raphael had nearly choked on when Leo had informed him that Donnie was dying. The strange thing was, Slash looked just as taken aback by the news as the hotheaded turtle had. The larger mutant's glowing eyes constricted as they fell upon the unconscious turtle in his clutches.
"Master Splinter said that Donnie's really sick and if he isn't treated soon, he – he might not make it."
"You're lying! You'd say anything to save your brother's shell!"
A vigorous shake of the head demonstrated Slash's obvious skepticism and Donatello's slack body bounced in the turbulence, but his eyes remained sealed shut.
Afraid that Slash was going to hurt Donnie even more than he already had, Raphael's heart started to thump inside his chest in an irregular rhythm. The red-masked turtle slowly moved his right hand towards his own grappling hook, preparing for the worst.
"I'm not lying, Slash! If you ever knew me at all, you'd know I've always been honest with you."
"That's a load of bull and you know it, Raphael! You said we'd be a team! That we'd be partners! But you ditched me for them!" The heavy scorn Slash put on the word 'them' was pure acid meant to eat away at Raph's thick skin, but the temperamental ninja let it roll off him like the rain.
"That was before you attacked my brothers! You crossed the line, Slash!" After a brief pause, Raphael's tone softened to a more rational level. "But you can change. I know you're not a killer. Don't do this! Don't make Donnie pay for my mistakes!"
"You don't know me! Not anymore!" An instant later, Slash hoisted Donatello up and it looked as if he was about to throw the injured turtle over the edge of the building, but he suddenly stopped when his eyes met Raphael's.
"Spike! Please!"
There was so much desperation in those two words – in those two eyes – that Slash's hands started to shake, just like before. He gazed at Donatello, unconscious and flaccid in his grip, and, once again, he saw red.
So much red!
It was everywhere.
He could still see the wire cutters. Still see the genius turtle's nearly severed finger. Still hear the shrieks and the sobbing. Still hear Donatello's frantic pleas for him to stop...
"S – Stop! Stop! Please! Spike! I know you're still in there! P – Please! Don't let him do this!"
"SHUT UP! Spike isn't here anymore!"
"Yes, he is! Spike, listen to me! The mutagen created Slash, but it didn't destroy you! Deep down inside, you're still Spike! The same turtle Raph took in. The same turtle he loved!"
"L – Loved?"
"Yes. He loved you... a lot more than h – he ever loved me."
Peering over at Raphael again, Slash looked as though he was just seeing the red-masked turtle for the very first time. The larger mutant's mouth gaped open as if to speak, but the only thing that came out was a quiet exhale.
"Spike?"
Ever since his mutation, just hearing the name 'Spike' had made Slash's blood boil, but at this moment, the warmth radiating inside him felt different somehow. A floodgate of memories soon came rushing back, full force...
"You understand me, don't you, Spike?"
"Oh, hey there, little guy. Y – You okay, Spike? Y – You're all good. Old Raph won't let anything happen to ya."
"I know you're a little worried about me. Look, I'm not gonna lie to you. We've never gone into a fight like this and... I don't know what's gonna happen. But you don't have to worry. I will make it back. I love you, man."
"Spike! Spike! NO!"
Slash shook his head from side to side again, in a futile attempt to jar loose the words he didn't want to remember. "D – Don't call me that." There should have been more conviction behind his tone. More volume in his voice, but there just wasn't enough air in his lungs.
"I'm sorry. I, uh – I know you go by Slash now, but it's just – Well, I took care of you for so long, it's hard for me not to think of you as Spike. Heh. You, of all turtles, should know how stubborn I am."
The trace of a smile lifted the corners of Slash's mouth up ever-so slightly, but a low groan from Donatello tugged the expression into a grimace. The larger mutant's piercing, green eyes drifted down towards the wounded turtle now draped against his side. He couldn't help but to stare at the extensive damage he had done.
"He's dying, Slash! Can't you see that?"
"But you can change. I know you're not a killer. Don't do this! Don't make Donnie pay for my mistakes!"
"Spike! Please!"
The more Slash thought about it, the more he wondered if it was actually Raphael's mistakes that Donatello was paying for.
Was this the price Slash was willing to pay for his so-called revenge? Taking a life?
Would killing one of the brothers bring him the retribution he so coveted?
Would this truly make he and Raphael even?
Another pitiful groan from Donatello sent Slash's gaze back across to the adjacent building, where the red-masked turtle stood, anxiously awaiting the larger mutant's next move. The only other time that Slash had seen Raphael look as vulnerable as he did right now was when he had looked at 'Spike.' The real Spike. The one that had existed before all of this. Not the gigantic, ferocious creature that had heartlessly taken his brother away.
Without any warning, Donatello's body was suddenly dropped down onto the rooftop in a disheveled heap, eliciting a sharp cry of pain from the genius. The huge mutant towering over the downed turtle continued to stare at Raphael for several, long-drawn-out seconds before turning to run into the shadows.
"S – Spike!"
Though it pained him to just let Slash go, Raphael's main concern right now was his brother.
Not even waiting for the initial shock to subside, the temperamental turtle leapt across to the building where Donatello laid frighteningly still. Scooping his little brother partially up off the rooftop and cradling him in one arm, Raph used his free hand to lightly pat the side of Donatello's swollen face. The heat searing off the wounded turtle's skin was unmistakable, as was the feel of him violently trembling in Raphael's hold.
"Donnie? Wake up!"
A frail whimper was Donatello's only response.
"Come on, Donnie! Open your eyes!" Though his little brother was clearly unconscious, Raph still tried urgently to get through to him. He increased the intensity of his pats, so much so that they verged on slaps, but Donatello remained disturbingly limp. This sent a wave of panic straight through Raphael.
"Ah, shell! Ah, shell!" Reaching for his T-phone, Raphael hastily started mashing buttons until he finally got the right number. Two rings later, the sound of his older brother's disgusted voice came on.
"Raph! Why'd you hang up on me?!"
If not for the direness of the situation, the temperamental turtle would've made some snide remark in response to the fearless leader's question. As it was, Raph was too busy freaking out.
"Leo! You need to – " Not the least bit surprisingly, Leonardo cut Raphael off mid-sentence, but the hotheaded turtle was quick to return the favor.
"And why on Earth would you turn off your GPS? Do you have any idea how – "
"Just shut up and listen for once, Leo! I found Donnie!"
A few stunned moments of silence followed before Leonardo stammered out his reply. "Y – You wh – what?"
"I found him, but I need your help! He's unconscious and I... I don't know what to do!"
"Okay. First things first: try to stay calm." The poorly repressed panic in Leo's voice seemed rather contradictory, given what he had just said, but his next line came out far more confident sounding. Like he had somehow channeled Master Splinter's eternal patience. "Now, tell me where you are."
"I – I'm not sure. May – Maybe a few miles from the apartment building where Slash was... where he was holding Donnie prisoner." Biting back a growl, Raph scanned the area for something familiar. Anything that might lead the rest of his family to his current location. "I – I don't see any street signs or businesses I recognize. There's a, um – there's a billboard for the Channel 6 News a few rooftops from where I'm at."
"Good, good. That's a start. Now, I need you to turn your tracker back on so we can head towards you."
Though he knew Leonardo couldn't see the gesture, Raphael nodded his understanding. The hotheaded turtle's usual stubborn pride was nowhere to be found; replaced by a sense of hopelessness and despair. A fact that his older brother must have been well-aware of based on the deliberate gentleness in his tone. Leonardo was speaking to him like he was some scared little kid.
In a way, Raph was...
"Hurry, Leo! He's burning up! And there's – there's a lot of blood! This is bad. This is really, really bad."
"It's gonna be okay, Raphael. We're coming to get you. Until then, I want you to do whatever you can to stop the bleeding and keep him comfortable, all right?"
Tears sprung from Raph's eyes the moment he heard the words 'It's gonna be okay.' The same exact words he had spoken to his genius brother that fateful night...
"Listen, Donnie! It's gonna be okay. You've just gotta hold on for a little bit longer. Can you do that for me? I promise you that I'm gonna find you soon. I won't let him hurt you again, little brother. And I swear on my life that I will make him pay!"
They had been lies.
Nothing but lies!
"Raph?"
"Yeah?" Raphael's response sounded more like a ragged exhale than an actual word. Maybe that was because he felt as though someone was tightening a vice around his airway, slowly squeezing the life out of him.
"I won't let him hurt you again, little brother."
Gaze drifting back down towards Donatello, Raphael stared at the visual evidence of just how wrong that promise had been. The rain had rinsed away some of the blood and filth, but it could not wash away the countless wounds and scars that lie deep beneath the surface.
Scars that may never heal...
"I know it's hard, Raph, but you have to pull yourself together. Remember, that's what you told me the night Slash took Donnie? You said Donnie needs us all to stay strong right now. Well, that's what he needs from you right now. He needs you to be our stubborn-as-shell hothead."
There was a long pause before the red-clad turtle's voice finally came back on the line, dull and cracked, like brittle paper.
"I did this to him, Leo."
Though he hated himself for it, the leader had no choice but to be painfully blunt. Sympathy was a luxury he simply could not afford at this moment. Not when his genius brother's life was at stake. "You can blame yourself for everything later, Raphael! Right now, you have to stop thinking about yourself and start thinking about Donnie!" Gone was the gentleness in Leonardo's tone; buried by the anger he had been trying so adamantly to hide. Not just tonight, but for the past eleven days now.
A bit stunned by his older brother's chilling brusqueness, Raph's defensive side instinctively reared its ugly head, but he soon realized that everything Leonardo had said was spot-on. All this 'woe is me' crap wasn't doing Donnie any good.
"I hate it when you're right. You know that?"
"Yeah. I know."
A fleeting smile passed Raph's lips, but a moment later, his frown returned, even deeper than before. The grim reality of what had come to pass lie bleeding in his grasp.
"Just get your shell in gear, okay? I'm not the only one Donnie needs right now." The call disconnected from Leo's end, telling the hotheaded turtle that his big brother was already on the way.
Sucking in a winded breath, Raphael carefully lowered Donatello's unresponsive form until it was level with the rooftop surface. The older turtle then began the painful process of trying to repair the damage that had been done.
But deep down inside, Raph knew he could never truly fix this.
Even if his little brother managed to pull through, some things would still be forever broken.
To be continued…
*More Author's Notes: This poor family. Haven't they been through enough? Ugh! How could I be so cruel to them when I love them so much? Shame on me!
As always, please take a moment to favorite, follow, like, reblog, review, and/or comment on 'Slash's Revenge' if you are enjoying the story and want to see more. Pretty please! I really appreciate the feedback and it's super nice to know if people are still reading. I truly hope everyone liked the chapter. Please say so if you did…
Thanks so much for reading.
CJ
PS – New 'TMNT Shell Shot' coming soon! ٩(^ᴗ^)۶