*DISCLAIMER: I do not own the rights to the Twilight Saga and it's characters. This is purely artistic fiction drawn in inspiration from Stephenie Meyers words.
*Warning: Brief mention of abuse/traumatic events at the end.
After ensuring that Embry would take over, Jake and Bella left the shop, driving away on his motorcycle. They were long overdue for a serious conversation, four years worth. Jake stopped along the road that led to First Beach, parking near a massive oak tree with barren branches. Most of its leaves were dead already, scattered over the jade green grass. He laid out his leather jacket for Bella to sit on. They reflected on the past and discussed recent events while watching the low tide come in.
"How long have you been back in town?" Jake asked.
"Not long. Today is day three." Bella replied. She leaned her temple onto his shoulder.
"Why didn't you call? Or come sooner?"
Bella shrugged, "call and say what exactly? I didn't think you wanted to see me. I said some pretty nasty things to you at the wedding—everyone else, too."
"We never held it against you." He whispered against her mess of soft curls.
"I needed time to come to my senses. He was really good at painting himself to be this knight in silver armor, and despite everyone telling me I was wrong, I had to find all that out on my own." Bella shivered.
"Are you cold?" Jake scooted closer, pressing more of his body to hers while they sat on the hill overlooking the shore.
"No," a meek smile curled on her lips, "but if you're offering, I won't complain."
"I'm just glad you're safe, Bells." He hooked his right arm around her middle, gently squeezing her to him. "I worried about you every single day."
"R-really?" Her lips parted; she exhaled a terse gasp.
"Yeah. Lotta lost sleep. Right after everything happened, I phased and ran all the way to northern Canada," he paused, "I was gone for close to a full year. I let my wolf take over. My human self couldn't cope."
"I... I'm sorry." Bella murmured.
"Don't you say that." He said with a delicate but urgent seriousness.
"But I am sorry, I didn't mean to make you worry."
"You did what you thought was right. None of it was your fault. We were both so young—I was so impulsive." He chuckled.
"Just a tad." She agreed, smiling up at him.
"Hey, it's in the past. What matters is you're here now."
Jake lifted his arm, hunching over so he could take his work boots off. He stood up, peeled off his jumpsuit, and stowed it in one of the side compartments on the bike. She sat there confused for a moment until he rolled up his tight jean pant legs, removed his socks, and tucked them into his empty boots.
He continued, "you wanna take a walk on the beach with me? Like when we first hung out?"
Bella stared up at him with an incredulous look.
"Right n-now?" She stammered.
"Yeah, I thought it would be nice. Water'll still be warm this time of the year."
Bella pondered her response. "Sure, that sounds nice."
She followed in his footsteps, removing her worn-down converse, dainty half socks and rolling up her skinny-jean pant legs. He extended his hand to help her stand up, and they carefully descended the steep slope to the waterline. Jake was right. The water was pleasant with the sun shining; it was near perfect weather. Bella pushed up her flannel sleeves and soaked up as much of it as she could. The wind cut into her like a knife, but she stayed close to Jake to sap warmth from him. He had more than enough to spare.
"So... Seth told me it was Embry's idea to open up shop." She added, avoiding a large, pointy seashell. The warm, shallow water lapped at her shins; grey sand squished in between her toes with every step she took.
"Yeah, it was. It's been really tough running a business. Lots of paperwork, budgeting, and dealing with a few rude customers... but I love workin' with my pack. Wouldn't trade it for anything."
"I bet. Being there felt like nothing's changed. Everyone still treats me like family." She murmured.
"Oh, but a lot's changed," he barked a laugh. "It's been... interesting, to say the least."
"What do you mean?" She peered up at him, pushing a stray tuft of dark brown hair behind her left ear.
"You already know about Em' being pregnant, and it's not my business to share, but Rach is, too. Oh, and Quil and Embry are together. Like together."
"Wait. They are?" Bella gawked.
"Mhm. I didn't see it comin'," he smirked. "They're not the only ones, though. Leah finally imprinted last year on a girl from Port Angeles. She's really nice. They live further north of here."
"Has... everyone imprinted?" She hesitated, not sure if she wanted to know the answer.
"To my knowledge, everyone except Brady, Collin and Seth."
"Jacob." She stopped in her tracks, standing completely still. "You? Y-you imprinted, too?"
He was silent for a moment.
"What of it?" He faced away from her on purpose.
"That's something you definitely should've told me earlier." Bella didn't know how to respond to this news. She knew she wasn't entitled to him after however many years being away, but it didn't hurt any less. "Are you at least happy?"
Jake rotated and stationed himself squarely in front of her, shielding her eyes from the harsh afternoon sunlight. Her features bore a pensive expression as she looked up at him.
"More than words can say." He wrapped his muscular arms around her upper body and held her against his chest. His nimble fingers ran through her tangled chestnut brown hair, tentatively smoothing it.
"Jake—" she shoved away from him, her face crumpled in anger. Bella glared at his blithe expression. "You can't do that. You're in love with someone else."
"Am I?" Jacob captured her face, cradling it in his enormous hands. "Bella, it's you. I imprinted on you."
"W-what?" Bella blinked rapidly. "When?" She croaked. The wind betrayed her, and a waft of his musky scent filled her desperate lungs. He smelled of pine, a wood stove, and something else. She couldn't put her finger on the scent until the wind blew again: the brisk ocean.
"Right when I had given up hope of ever falling in love. When you walked back into my life again," he inhaled slowly, followed by a short sigh, "the moment I saw you standing in my shop."
Bella gulped nervously, squeezing her eyes shut. Was that why the entire pack acted weird? She recalibrated, forcing herself to look at him. This was wild, no pun intended.
"No way." Her brow furrowed in confusion. "How is that possible? Why now?" Her mind was filled with a million burning questions.
"I don't know. It's why I said nothing when I first saw you. I could barely walk. The feeling was so potent, so overwhelmingly strong. I felt as though I was being swept away by one tidal wave after another."
"But why me?" Bella whispered, "I'm not worth it."
"Shh, yes you are." He set the tip of his index finger to the middle of her lips, marveling at how soft they felt.
"I'm divorced, Jacob! I have no money, no job, and no degree. That's as bad as bad can get."
"No, it's not. So what if you're divorced? You're only twenty-one—you have your whole life ahead of you. It's not too late to start over. So what if you don't have a fancy, shmancy degree? I don't and I'm doin' just fine."
"Point taken, but I have nothing to contribute. How will we live?"
"It's not like any of that really matters, but if it helps you feel better, I have close to ten grand saved up, a house of my own, and reliable transportation. My wealth is your wealth."
"You have a house?" Bella asked.
"Yes, it's not much, but it's home. Next question." He shifted his hand to cup her jawline, stroking the smooth plane of her cheek with his thumb.
"It's not just that. Jake... I don't think you understand the extent of my problems." She sighed and leaned into his fiery touch.
"Enlighten me, then." He crooned.
"I'm not right. I have complex PTSD. I'm pretty sure I have depression and generalized anxiety. I need to see a therapist." She huffed, "the list goes on and on."
"Bells, this isn't the first time we've gone through something like this, is it? I have time—I've waited this long, so I think I can wait a little longer. I'm not giving up on you, and I won't let you go through this alone."
Bella pouted, trying to swallow down her feelings of guilt.
"As much as I don't want you to give up, all I've ever done is hurt you, Jacob. I broke your heart, ran away, and... and this imprint stuff... Your choice and free will were stripped away."
"No, it changed nothing," he urged. "Bella, I've always been in love with you. If anything, it solidified what I already felt and knew. It was an answer to the mountain of questions I had since I became a wolf."
"Questions? Like what?" Her expression smoothed.
"When would I imprint? Why didn't I imprint earlier? Why didn't it happen with someone else? Those sorts of questions. My imprint happened at the right time with the right person. It makes sense now, but it didn't when we were younger. This was destiny—we are destined."
"Where does that put us? I'm sure as hell not stable enough for a serious, committed relationship right now. I can't meet you half way or make any promi—"
Jake interrupted her, "it doesn't mean what you think it means. We can pick up right where we left off. I will never push you into anything you don't want. I'm happy simply having you back in my life again."
They remained quiet for a few minutes as the tide rolled against them. She mulled over everything he said, pretending that his touch, his mere voice, didn't soothe all the demons she was battling inside her mind. Jake broke the silence.
"What do you think? Can we be best friends again?" His minty breath washed over her face. She stole a glance at his expression, focusing on the surrounding scenery.
"I don't think best friends... I don't think they act like we do." She splayed her hands out over his broad chest, feeling the contours of his collarbones and the defined, corded pectoral muscles under them. "We're something different."
"We don't need a label then. We're just Bella and Jake."
Her heart pin-balled around the inside of her ribs, ricocheting off every surface with his face so close to hers. She wanted him, and to be with him, but she knew she had so far to come to even function as a regular person again. Bella's love for Jake was effortless, but her past lingered.
He continued, "it's okay, really. Look at me, please." His voice was a gentle, pleading whisper.
Bella listened to his request, knowing that when she did, everything would change. She'd be lost inside those damning, beautiful eyes; so dark they exacted a powerful absence of light, but so full of life compared to the empty topaz ones she had once adored.
She had been denied happiness for so long, and as her own personal sun, Jacob's radiant personality and unyielding warmth breathed new life into her. Being with Jacob came naturally. It was easy. If it weren't for him, she wouldn't be here today. Bella would have died on that very beach for a distant memory.
"Yes, Jake?" She mumbled, staring at his full lips. Her bronze, cherubic eyes traced the steep curve of his Cupid's bow, then trailed up to look deep into his sable colored ones.
"Can I ask one thing?" His heart was fluttering underneath her fingertips inside his chest. Jacob was focused, his words were light and his voice deeper in timbre.
"What is it?" The breath hitched in her throat. She anticipated what he was going to ask. The electric tension building in the air between them was palpable.
"Can I... can I kiss you?" Jake recalibrated, "we don't have to if you don't want to."
His words evaporated into thin air and, with them, everything she had been obsessing over. It was only them in that moment.
It was time to let go. She'd been fighting her love for him for years. Bella wasn't a teenager anymore. She didn't have a perfect answer to how she felt about him, or how to navigate healing from her past trauma, but he would stay by her side and help her figure it out.
"Uhm, y-yeah, I think... I'd like that."
She didn't even remember replying before he inched forward, hesitating right before they connected the circuit. Bella's hands furled into his long silky hair, carefully clutching the sensitive strands at the nape of his neck. She towed him down to her level, and he obliged with a silent fervor.
Time came to a complete stop, then dissolved under the awaited bliss of their first kiss.
Jacob gingerly closed the rest of the gap between them, meshing his mouth with hers. His kiss was hot and inviting, a definitive yet welcome opposite of any she'd ever experienced prior. Bella found herself swept up in irrevocable, healthy yearning. She explored the unwavering sensation and his petal soft lips, knowingly falling back onto the metaphorical blanket of unprecedented happiness they provided.
She craved more as time ticked on, drunk on the ecstasy of their connection. The kiss transitioned from sweet and innocent to an inelegant, feverish search. She had never been desired before, truly and completely hungered for.
Bella pulled back first, gasping for air, hesitant to delve completely into this new chapter of their relationship. A dubious, timid voice in the back of her mind questioned whether this kiss was a product of his true feelings for her or prompted by his genealogical instincts.
He sensed her unspoken reserves and painted her flushed, warm cheeks with smaller, clumsy kisses. From one side of her face, over the peak of the bridge of her nose to the other side, he wasted no time expressing his long held affection for her. Jake was eager to prove his undying love but knew that if he rushed, or was too dominant, it would hurt Bella in indescribable ways. Her mental and emotional well-being was too important to him for him to risk hurting her further with too much intimacy.
He paused his pursuit of her, pressing his forehead to hers. They remained quiet, drinking in the calmness that came afterward.
"How was that for a first kiss?" He breathed.
She smirked. "I think it was good. Amazing, actually. You've outdone yourself, Mr. Black."
He grinned from ear to ear, happy to hear those patiently awaited words.
"So now what?" Jake asked.
"Uhh... I don't know. Maybe you should show me this house of yours."
"Yeah, I can make us some lunch while we're there. I'm starving."
"You're always hungry, Jake." Bella shook her head.
"Not always. Maybe like sixty percent of the time." He shrugged. "I can't help it."
They journied back up the rolling hill and let the sun help dry them off before redressing and heading back toward the reservation. All the while—reminiscing on time lost and forgotten memories.
Jake couldn't help but be nervous. The woman of his dreams, and his imprint, was going to see his bachelor pad. What would she think? Would she be repulsed? Thankfully, he had cleaned up the day before, and thus it would seem barren and empty, more than dirty. Jake didn't spend too much time there. It was merely a place to sleep in between continuous patrols and staying at rotating pack members' houses. The danger of vampires had since passed with the Cullen's leaving, but they preferred to remain vigilant rather than complacent.
He pulled up to the front of the house and let her off before parking the softtail inside the four-car garage. Truth be told, the square footage of the garage was bigger than the main bedroom, even with the walk-in closet and bathroom suite. Jake preferred to spend most of his time outside the house, in the company of his multitude of tools, despite his job already being a mechanic. He was lonely anywhere else; the garage was his happy place.
Bella's eyes went wide. The house wasn't much more in size compared to Charlie's, but the charm it held was clear. It reminded her of her time visiting Emily many years ago. There were elements that were newer than the rest, but overall, it possessed a woodsy feel. Before even walking inside, she sensed an overwhelming feeling of attachment. His house, him, and being in La Push felt like home.
"Well? Whatcha think?" Jake rounded the corner, sporting a sunny, knee-rattling smile.
"I think it's perfect." Bella nodded.
"Don't let the outside fool you." He chuckled. "I have more renovations to do. It's an old house."
Jake fished for the keys in the confines of his pants pocket, proceeding to drop them twice before they even reached the steps.
"Are you alright? Did that kiss scramble your brain?" Bella stifled a giggle.
"I'm f-fine." His voice cracked involuntarily and they bust out laughing.
"Guess that answers my question." She nudged him and they stumbled through the front door together.
Jake took his jacket from her shoulders and hung it up on the rack to the right of the entrance.
"Welcome to casa de Jake. Would you like anything? A pop?" He wandered toward the kitchen.
"I believe you promised lunch." Bella replied, following him.
"Oh, that's right. I did." He frowned, puzzling his predicament.
"What? Do you not have any food?" She quizzed. Bella sat down at the drift wood bar stools next to the island in the center of the kitchen. She marveled at their beauty, noting the sturdiness. Jake was good with his hands.
"No, I do." He walked to the stainless steel fridge, opening it to glance at all the miscellaneous items within. "How do you feel about a peanut butter and jelly sandwich?"
"I could go for one." Her shoulders slumped forward, and she continued her observation of the dusty, empty kitchen.
"Great, because I think that's all I can make. I haven't gone grocery shoppin' in a week." He palmed the grape jelly from the inside door, and wheeled around to find the peanut butter in one of the near empty cupboards beside the fridge. "I usually eat at Emily's, Kim's or Rach's."
"That's okay. I'm not high maintenance." She smiled.
He remained quiet and fished a clean butter knife and spoon from the cutlery drawer. Jake laid out two paper plates, grabbing the loaf of bread with his free hand from the opposite counter. He went to work putting together the sandwich he promised.
"How many?" He asked. Jake expertly spread jelly on one slice and a too large smattering of peanut butter on the other.
"One is fine. I haven't had much of an appetite lately."
"One gourmet peanut butter and jelly sandwich comin' up." He finished her food first, presenting it with flare on the plain white paper plate before starting one for himself.
Bella took one tiny sized bite and chewed quietly. "You also asked if I wanted a pop."
"Shit—I'm sorry, Bells. Lemme grab one." He mumbled between greedy spoonfuls of peanut butter.
Jake tossed the dirty silverware into the empty sink, using the ball of his foot to reopen the fridge. Bella stole a peek inside, taking note of the similar contents within that reminded her of Charlie's fridge. There was one entire shelf dedicated to drinks. She eyed the assortment of beer and raised an eyebrow in question.
"Aren't you twenty?" She managed to force down a big glob of peanut butter in the one bite she'd taken.
"I'll be twenty-one in January. Why?" He licked his middle finger clean after some jelly spilled out the side of his stack of sandwiches. Bella tried not to stare and inconspicuously averted her eyes to study the rest of his sparse decor.
"No reason." She squeaked.
"You saw all the beer," he smirked, "curtesy of Paul and Jared. How they got it—I'll never know."
"It's cool. I'm not judging." Bella had no room to talk. She had never experienced college life or partying. The most she had ever drank was the night of the wedding, albeit it was a few sips of champagne.
"I don't really drink it. It's for bonfire nights, and we burn it off fast, anyway. It's impossible to enjoy the stuff." He took another massive bite of his sandwich and grimaced. "Your drink. Damn it."
"Please." She laughed softly.
Jake reached into the fridge and grabbed a red colored can with the words Dr. Salt on the front, handing it to her. She opened it and took a pensive swig, just to force most of the viscous peanut butter down. He took a can for himself, opened it, and gulped down more than half before placing it on the counter.
"You've got a birthday in a few days." He said between avid chews.
"Don't remind me." She stared down at her food, passively separating the crust.
"What's wrong with celebrating your life?"
"Nothin'. Just don't enjoy getting older."
"You're not even old. Old is like... our dad's age." He barked a laugh, finishing his third sandwich and starting his fourth.
"They were our age once." She murmured thoughtfully.
"Yeah, but there's no use in being sad over it." He stopped eating for a moment.
"I hate finding another wrinkle in the mirror every time I look."
"What wrinkles?" He reached for her, fingertips brushing over her cheek.
Bella froze, tensing all the muscles in her body. Jake noticed her visible change and retracted his hand immediately.
He continued, worried, "Bells? You okay?"
She said nothing, her eyes tightly shut. Bella was trapped inside her mind, lost within a memory of Edward belittling her. His icy vitriol still slicing her apart without his stone presence. Jake came around the corner of the island and gingerly grabbed both of her shoulders. Her eyes snapped open, gluing to his concerned expression.
"What? I'm sorry, I don't remember what we were talking about." She murmured. Her voice was hardly above a whisper.
"He really did a number on you, didn't he?" Jake tried to contain his temper, the feeling of rage being drowned out by the need to comfort her.
"Y-yeah," Bella sighed, "I'm sorry."
"That's the second time in less than a minute. You don't have to say you're sorry. Nothing's wrong." Jake said, pulling her into a compassionate embrace. "You're safe. You're okay. I'm not gonna yell at you or hurt you. Ever."
"I know, Jake. I know you won't, but I can't help it." She drew a shaky breath in, exhaling twice as slowly.
"It's gonna take some time to forget what you've learned to protect yourself." He murmured, massaging the base of her neck. "Talking with a professional will help."
"But I don't have a job, or money—"
"Bella, I do. It doesn't matter what it cost, you need it. I can only help so much."
She remained quiet for a moment, enjoying the heat of his skin pressed to hers.
"You're right. I think I'm afraid to be a burden. I want to be my own person, to take care of myself, and make my own decisions."
"You're not a burden, you've never been one." He pulled away to look into her chestnut brown eyes. "You are your own person, and you're capable of many things. That doesn't mean you're not deserving of help or love at the same time."
Bella blinked rapidly, looking back up into his dark eyes before she hid her face into his chest. Unforgiving tears welled within them, and she stifled a short sob.
"I... I know that."
"Let it out." He whispered, smoothing her hair and rubbing her back. "You're safe."
And she was. Bella was always safe and cared for in the company of Jacob Black.
*It took me a minute, but the next chapter is out! Let me know what ya'll think. :D
*To be frank, the kiss was necessary, and I think it was an important first step to their relationship.
*How sweet was the conversation at the end? :') My heart. I love respectful and sweet Jacob.