YIN AND YANG

CHAPTER 3:

BALLSY

Harry hated dressing up in formal clothes. It reminded him too much of everything he left Britain to get away from. Of course, that elegant dress Luna dressed up in made it worthwhile. She knew better than to dress eccentrically for these occasions. She more than made up for it in her behaviour.

Of course, they spotted the invitation for what it was. Harry and Luna knew who Batman was. Or rather, what public identity he hid behind the cowl. That was probably a key point. And in any case, Luna had put a discreet tracking charm on Batman when they first met. Even before then, they had speculated as to who he was.

He had to be rich, or at least have access to very expensive items, like his Batsuit, the various gadgets, and the Batmobile. He had some sort of issue with crime, perhaps being a victim of it once. The tracking charm only confirmed the name they had at the top of the list, the man whose ball they were attending, was Batman. Bruce Wayne.

It actually made sense. Bruce Wayne played the role of a hedonistic playboy, and yet, he also did all these philanthropic donations that were certainly more than that most would do. He was also a canny and competent businessman, with Wayne Enterprises having ascended to greater heights than it had under his parents. He had been robbed of his parents at a young age. Harry felt it had been perhaps crueller with Bruce: he had gotten to know his parents before they were gunned down. Harry hadn't.

It wasn't something they intended to advertise. Not at all. What was the point? Batman did more good than ill for Gotham, even if he seemed to be a magnet to the supercriminals like the Joker or Poison Ivy. Or Victor Fries, though he had dropped out of crime.

Victor and Nora Fries were now in hiding, Harry having given them money and buying them (through less-salubrious channels, albeit discreet ones) a home that they could live together in. Luna had even managed to create a potion that, as long as the main dose was taken daily, Victor could actually survive without his suit, and even after a day, it took hours for the effects to fully wear off, giving him enough time to get back to a refrigerated room or his suit. Apparently, he had spent the whole first day with his wife giving him one hell of a reunion present. Thankfully, she didn't mind his blue skin and frostbitten flesh. That went to show how much Nora was devoted to her husband.

Speaking of devotion…

"Now, remember, Luna, keep the discord to a minimum," Harry said as they walked up the drive to Wayne Manor, having Apparated to a safe distance away. "If we're going to talk about conspiracy theories, keep it to Muggle ones."

Luna pouted. "Those are no fun. Oswald really did kill Kennedy, and Muggles really did land on the Moon. I should know, you took me there for our honeymoon(1). I mean, in space, nobody can hear you scream."

"I did. Specifically, 'OH MERLIN, HARRY!'," Harry said with a smirk. "And while I'm not Merlin, I appreciated the sentiment. I still do."

Luna giggled. "Usually three times a night, when we aren't roleplaying."

"Yes, about that. We'll have to not talk about what goes on in the bedroom, either. Literally or metaphorically. Yes, I know we've done it on the Moon, underwater, in the air, and in just about every room in a house that it is possible to do it with. I'm not complaining about it, I'm just saying people don't need to know. If you're going to be a gadfly, try something other than sex. And remember, we're not here to expose Bruce Wayne. Or the magical world."

"Killjoy," Luna pouted.

"Loony," Harry retorted. He was one of the few people who said that with any affection. Ginny and Hermione were the others.

"Scarhead."

"Arkham escapee."

"Ooh, you are in for it now, Harry," Luna said, her mock-scowl becoming worse. "Anyway, I'd raise the class of people if I was ever incarcerated in Arkham. I bet that if I ever met Poison Ivy, I'd get her to snog me without poisoning me."

"Probably because you're like Harley. Quiet now, we're nearly there."

They were met at the door by a flunky who looked bemused that they hadn't come by limo, but he waved them in after perusing his guest list and being presented with the invitation. They were escorted through into the ballroom, where people were dancing, drinking, or discoursing in little groups.

Harry spotted one pair he wanted to see. An older man, grizzled but muscled, keen intelligence flashing in his bespectacled eyes, white hair and a moustache, and looking as uncomfortable with his suit as Harry felt. With him was an attractive young woman with red hair, green eyes glinting behind glasses, sitting in a wheelchair. Nonetheless, she managed to dress herself in a very elegant dress. "…hate this too, Dad, but he's raising money to upgrade the security at Arkham. That's a cause you can get behind, right?" the woman asked.

The man nodded. "Of course it is, Barbara. I just don't like being at occasions like this while things are still going on. Never mind the fact that the supercriminals like to target shindigs like this. And of course, there's this new vigilante pair to deal with."

"You mean Yin and Yang?" Harry asked, stepping forward. "Commissioner Gordon, I presume? And Doctor Barbara Gordon? I'm Harry Potter, and this is my lovely wife Luna."

Gordon took his hand with a smile. "Good to meet you. Heard a bit about you two. Had someone come to me a week or so ago and say you had done hush-hush work in England. Claimed that you two were wizards or something, and that as I had to deal with the rather colourful characters here, I was allowed to be in the know. You apparently had to deal with some terrorist wizard attacking you, didn't you?"

Harry nodded. "Who was it that came to you?"

"Some Brit called Shacklebolt. Called himself the Minister of Magic, but I could tell he used to be a cop."

"Yeah, he used to be with the magical police force, the Aurors," Harry said, both relieved and irritated that Kingsley Shacklebolt had done so. Still, better him than, say, Malfoy. At least Kingsley knew how to act like a Muggle when the situation called for it. "The problem is, there's the whole Statute of Secrecy thing. Hell, it used to be even worse here than in Britain until the middle of last century. Then again, this city's known for its weirdos." He then looked at Barbara. "Sorry your dad and I are talking shop."

"That's fine," Barbara said, smiling. "I don't get many people calling me 'Doctor' Gordon. Then again, my doctorate's in library science."

"Hey, never underestimate a good library," Luna said. "Have you ever read Terry Pratchett?"

"Of course. Are you talking about L-Space?" Barbara said, grinning.

"Yep."

"What are they talking about?" Gordon asked.

"L-Space, a concept created by a humorous fantasy novelist called Terry Pratchett. Luna loves him. Supposedly, because knowledge is power, and power is energy, and energy is mass, collections of books, especially bookstores and libraries, can warp space and time. And while that sounds ridiculous…"

"Potter, I've had to deal with some pretty ridiculous things in my time. A library that can warp time and space is not so much a leap of faith as it is a slight hop."

"Call me Harry, please," Harry said. "Most of the people who called me 'Potter' were usually those who hated my guts, Commissioner."

"Got it. And as long as it's while I'm off duty, you can call me James."

"My dad was called James. He worked for the Aurors too. Anyway, you were saying something about Yin and Yang earlier?"

"Yeah. These two…I'm still not sure what to make of them. I mean, it's been years since the Batman came onto the scene, and I'm still getting used to vigilantes working in this town. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate them bringing Scarecrow and Harvey back to Arkham, but even so…I've at least gotten to know the Batman, so I'm pretty skittish about these newcomers. And of course, the lawyers of some of these guys they deal with have a field day. Though I'll have to give Yin and Yang that much: they can restrain these guys without beating the tar out of them. That being said, look over there."

Harry followed Gordon's look, to a rather pompous looking, jowly man with a cane who was talking to the reporter Vicki Vale. He recognised him. "That's Quincy Sharp, isn't it? The current warden of Arkham Asylum?"

"Yes," Barbara said. "His family have a long and proud military history, but he was denied military service. He went into politics instead. He's loaded. He's the one who reopened Arkham and renovated it. Not that the security couldn't use work. He's not the only one here: he brought a couple of his staff along with him. See that woman sitting down there, making notes about something?"

Harry nodded. The woman was attractive, dark-haired, but had a fussy, pedantic air that reminded Harry of Hermione's worst traits. "Who's that?"

"Dr Penelope Young. Supposedly, she's one of the top therapists in Arkham, and also one of their key researchers. Ambitious and pretty intelligent," Barbara said. "I've read some of her papers."

"And that guy over there," Gordon said, nodding towards a burly black man, who had a metal claw instead of a hand, and who was talking to Bruce Wayne. "Aaron Cash. He used to be one of my best officers, until a few years back. He quit the force, and then joined Arkham Asylum as a guard. He's one of the best they have. He's got a rather strong enmity with Killer Croc. Apparently Croc ate his hand, and wants to eat the rest of him."

"Do you think Killer Croc may be an Animagus?" Luna asked. "I think he might be a kaiju Animagus."

"Kai-what?" Gordon asked.

"She means something like Godzilla, Dad," Barbara asked. "I'm guessing an Animagus is something like a witch or wizard that can transform into an animal or something."

"Got it in one," Harry said, though he noted that Barbara had more certainty in her eyes than from a mere guess. He reckoned she knew what they were.

"Maybe you should use your magic or something to help secure some of the inmates at Arkham," Gordon said. "We could do with less escapes."

"Now that's an idea," Luna mused. But before they could say anything more, there was a commotion outside. And the door burst open to reveal various massive vines and plants writhing in, making it fairly blatant who the gatecrasher was.

And even so, even if people didn't guess it, the woman sashaying her way in was pretty distinctive. Red hair, green skin and eyes, dressed in what looked like a one-piece swimsuit made entirely out of foliage, and bloody sexy. It could really be nobody else than Pamela Isley, better known as Poison Ivy.

"Oh, not now," Gordon groaned. Harry noticed that Bruce Wayne was leaving the room. Not that anyone else barring Luna and, it seemed, Barbara, whose eyes met Harry's.

"Greetings, the so-called great and the good of Gotham," Poison Ivy purred in a sultry tone. "Or, at least, the rich. I have come here to…" she added with disdain. But that was about as far as she got, before Luna Lovegood broke away from Harry, and went up to Ivy. "Oh, do we have a volunteer to act as my hostage?" Ivy asked, recovering her equilibrium rather quickly. "You look familiar."

Ivy was then surprised when Luna began kissing her. Then again, so was everyone else. After all, Ivy's kisses were infamously lethal. Luna then grinned widely after breaking it off, and then toppled to the ground. So too did Ivy, amazingly enough, her eyes wide, her arms snapping to her sides and her legs snapping together, before she dropped to the ground like a felled tree.

"Luna!" Harry yelled, dashing over to her. He fumbled in his pockets, realising that they had left their mokeskin pouches behind. And with them, any bezoars or antidotes they could use. And he couldn't use Apparition in front of these people, as not all of them knew of the mages, and even in a town full of weirdos, it might still be enough for him to get in trouble with the locals.

Luna hissed quietly, "When he comes, ask Batman for the antidote."

"But you're dying, Luna!"

"Not yet. You're not getting off that easily, Harry. It's paralytic, not cytotoxic, this one."

Luna had lost consciousness in the few minutes it took for the Batman to make his appearance, via the very door destroyed by Ivy. "Batman, I need your help. Luna, she…" Harry began.

"I know. That was very brave…and foolish," Batman said, walking over, plucking a small syringe form his utility belt. He then jabbed it into Luna, whose eyes flickered open. "It'll be a while before the poison completely leaches out of her system. She needs some rest. I'll go and take Ivy back to Arkham, where she belongs."

As Batman began dragging Ivy away, Alfred appeared. "If I may be of help?"

"Sure. I'll help you. Where're we taking her?" Harry asked.

"To one of the bedrooms. We have so many unused…"

A few hours later, Luna was still rather weakened by Ivy's poison, while Alfred and Harry tended to her. Barbara Gordon had also made her way in, while her father had left to go and deal with Ivy. Then, Bruce Wayne walked in, adjusting his tie, looking rather harassed and harried. "Sorry about that. Most of the other guests have gone. Ivy's a real weed, isn't she? Popping up when we don't need her…"

"Weeds are interesting," Luna said weakly. "All that genetic diversity you don't get with bred flowers. Thanks for saving me anyway, Batman."

You could feel the temperature in the room plummet, and the tension rise. You could certainly see the change between Bruce Wayne, wastrel playboy, and Bruce Wayne, vigilante. Harry facepalmed. "Goddammit, Luna…" he groaned.

"What? It's rude not to show gratitude."

At first, Bruce Wayne and Alfred looked set to protest, until Bruce then looked at the two wizards. "You knew," Bruce said. "That's why you let Ivy kiss you. Because you were sure I could get to you on time with the antidote. And you went in close so that you could use your magic without anyone noticing…am I correct, Yin and Yang?"

"Yep, we've been rumbled," Harry muttered. "I thought there was something odd about the way Barbara here was looking at us. So, seeing as you haven't denied being the Batman, what're you going to do with us?"

Bruce crossed his arms. "For the moment? Nothing. I don't like others following me into this lifestyle, magic or not. But for the moment, while I cannot trust you wholly, given that your actions have been consistently helpful…I will give you the benefit of the doubt. Besides, I heard what you did for Victor. He certainly deserves a second chance. And what you did at the ball saved us all a lot of trouble."

"Not angry I stole your thunder, Mr Wayne?" Luna asked with a cheeky grin.

"I'm more angry that you put yourself at risk," Bruce said.

"Worth it. How many people can say that they kissed Poison Ivy and lived? My cousin, you, me…any others?" Luna said.

"I would suggest that you start being serious," Bruce said.

"Actually, that was my late and lamented godfather," Harry said. "And Mr Wayne? You don't want to see her when she's serious. When she's serious is when it's time to start running for the hills."

"Is that a threat?" Bruce asked.

"No. I'm just telling you, a serious Luna is a danger to anyone who's pissed her off," Harry said. "She gets inventive. Just ask Antonin Dolohov…assuming you can find his head."

"I don't kill people who have roused my ire," Luna said in a faint, but deadly serious tone. "They do wish I didn't have such 'scruples' once I'm done with them, though. I gave Dolohov's head to Hermione. I think she slaps him every so often. Especially when he calls her a Mudblood. I don't do anything as mundane as kill or inflict pain. I am a Ravenclaw. We use our heads, our creativity."

"The guy who she's talking about is a mass-murderer and a rapist," Harry said. "If you know anything about our magic, then you may have heard of the defunct terrorist group known as the Death Eaters. He was one of them, and one of the worst. He also managed to escape before he was sent to prison, and tried to force himself on Luna. That was the last mistake he made. I think his other body parts are in separate vaults in Gringotts."

"Except his penis. I sold that to Borgin and Burkes' to be used as a dubious potion ingredient."

"Luna, I don't think they want to know that," Harry said.

"Actually, having had the displeasure of knowing Dolohov shortly before I left Britain," Alfred said, "I think I can safely say I find myself pleased."

"I'd also suggest that you avoid such displays of…creativity while in Gotham," Bruce said. "I'm taking a risk letting you do this here. Don't abuse that."

Harry got the feeling that Bruce was going to regret saying that. Just this sinking feeling he had…

CHAPTER 3 ANNOTATIONS:

Okay, this is the last chapter before the timeskip to the beginning of Batman: Arkham Asylum. I didn't think this story would become a full story before my next update, but, well, you're reading it now, aren't you? I hope you liked this, and how Harry and Luna revealed that they know who Batman is. He's still wary, but willing to give them the benefit of the doubt, for now, though his mind is thinking of ways to take them down if necessary. By the point that Arkham Asylum happens, he trusts them somewhat more, as does Gordon.

1. I did something similar for my (to date) one and only Harry/Ginny story, a one-shot called HoneyMoon. Only it was Harry and Ginny rather than Harry and Luna in that story.