*Author's Note*

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Killing For A Secret

Tolbert POV:

I was packin' up some shine bottles that I filled up after visitin' my sister whenever I heard a twig snap. I turned 'round only t'see that crazy Vance Bastard standin' in front of me wit' a twisted an' crazed look on his face, aimin' a pistol at me. Holdin' my hands up in surrender, I asked, "Why're ya aimin' that there pistol at me, Shaw?" Eh, I figured if I was polite, I wouldn't get shot. I foolishly didn't have my gun within reach since it was upfront on my buckboard, not in the back by the shine crate.

"You knocked up my wife, ya ginger fuck." He seethed darkly, his words havin' a drunken tint to them. He also reeked o'likker, most likely he drained a flask or two on his way 'ere.

"Well, she wasn't yer wife when I knocked her up." I reminded him, causin' the bastard t'cut his angry amber-honey eyes at me. "If I recall, she only married ya cause Devil Anse made her."

"Ya think you're so smart, sneakin' 'round to see my wife when I ain't home. Well, you're not smart. Not one bit, cause if ya were you've would've seen this comin' as a result of all you've done."

'Fore I could even ask when the hell he was goin' on about, he pulled the trigger and shot me. I felt a piercin' searin' pain tear into the side of my neck. Outta instinct, I covered my bleedin' neck wit' my hand as I wobbled backwards; fallin' into the back of my wagon.

I heard the Vance Bastard snicker paired wit' the soundof twigs crunchin' an' snappin' as he walked 'way, leavin' me for dead. God, my neck hurt an' burned so bad. I could feel the blood pourin' from my neck an' all I could think of is I'm a dead man cause I'm out here all by myself. I didn't feel like I could sit up or move. My body was too shocked by gettin' a bullet to the neck.

Oh god, I'm gonna die. I don't wanna die.

The Acreage Next Door…

Billy POV:

I was sittin' outback whittlin' whenever the door bounced open, startlin' me an' causin' my knife t'slip an' cut the inside of my thumb. "Damn…" I hissed 'fore lookin' over my shoulder t'see who'd come bargin' outta the kitchen. Low an' behold it was my mama.

"Billy, come wit' me. Your brother, Tolbert's in danger." Mama told me as she quickly stormed by me.

Jumpin' to my feet an' pocketin' my knife an' stick of wood, I asked, "Ya see somethin', mama?"

"Yes an' I pray it ain't too late t'save your brother." She told me as I ran up to her side.

"Where are we goin'?" I asked, walkin' in a quick pace to keep up with her frantic half-run.

"Tolbert's still." Ma answered as we rushed into the direction of my brother's land.

"What did ya see that's got us runnin' ov'r there?"

"Tolbert's been shot; wit'out us he'll surely die."

Oh, hell, I wasn't expectin' to hear my mama tell me that. I didn't say a word, just kept up wit' her fast pace as she nearly ran the route to my brother's still (which was by the far edge of his land that was quite a ways from my folks' land).

When we came upon my brother's still, Tolbert was layin' in the back of his wagon by a crate of shine. He was holdin' his neck an' his hand was coated in blood. I couldn't tell if he was alive or dead. It frightened me to tell the truth. Mama frantically ran ov'r to the wagon and climbed up into it, goin' straight to Tolbert's side. She was as white was a sheet as she placed her ear to my brother's chest, checkin' for a heartbeat. "He's still alive." She told me, raisin' her head an' pullin' my brother's hand back t'look ov'r his wound. "He's still bleedin' bad tho. I need ya to get us t'Aunt Betty's. She'll help us patch Tolbert up; come up wit' a way to hide him too."

"Okay, mama." I simply nodded, goin' over to the wagon.

As I climbed into the front of the wagon I heard the sound of my ma rippin' her slip t'make a makeshift bandage wit'. After sittin' down an' grabbin' the reigns, I looked ov'r my shoulder only to see my mama pressin' a piece of material to my unconscious brother's neck. Turnin' 'round, I snapped the reigns an' drove 'way from the still.

Oh god, I hope we get to Aunt Betty's in time to patch up my brother.

Jessa POV:

I was pacing the floors while burping Endor. Oh god, I was a mess. I was worried for both Shaw and Tolbert. On one hand I didn't want Shaw to destroy the only thread of light he had left in his soul by killing Tolbert in a jealous rage while on the other hand I didn't want Tolbert to die cause of one discretion, one moment, we shared. God, both of these men were in a bad situation and it was all cause of me. I felt so guilty.

I stopped my pacing whenever I heard the front door open. When I looked over at the door Shaw walked in with a hard, but satisfied look on his face. "You killed him." I stated, not asked, as my husband slammed the door shut behind him. Shaw didn't saw a word. Not one goddamned word. He just took off his hat and hung it up. "You did, didn't you?" I asked, more or less just wanting my husband to admit to his murderous sin, as he took off his jacket and hung it up. Once again, Shaw didn't say a word. He just took off his gun belt and hung it up. "Shaw?" I asked as a way to get him to talk to me; tell me what he did.

Shaw didn't utter a word, just gave me this tortured look with his honey eyes. It unsettled me, honestly. It made me feel that even tho he killed the so-called root of his problem it didn't fix anything; that he still felt horrible inside. He walked up to me and simply said, "Don't ask me somethin' ya already know the answer to." So, he really did kill Tolbert then. Shaw didn't say anything else, just took Endor from me.

It took me aback that after shooting Tolbert in cold blood, Shaw wanted to hold and spend time with Endor. I just shook my head and followed Shaw into the main room. "Are you hungry, Shaw?" I asked my husband as he took a seat in his armchair, cradling Endor gently in his arms.

"No." He shook his head, causing his golden-brown hair to sway every which way. "I'm just gonna sit and spend some time with him." Shaw told me, nodding his head towards our son to indicate that he was gonna hold him for a while.

"Okay." I agreed with a line, but sad smile. I was sitting on the edge of the sofa while telling my husband, "The kids are upstairs with Mary. She's reading to them." I almost forgot about Todd, so I quickly added in as an afterthought, "Oh, and Todd's still out."

"Ah…" Shaw nodded even tho he was paying more attention to the baby cradled in his arms then to me. A sad, forlorn look crossed over his face. His honey eyes pierced into my indigo ones as he told me in a hard, but deeply strained timbre, "If you're gonna cry and mourn that McCoy do it when I'm not home. I don't think I can handle watchin' ya shed tears over him."

"I'm not going to cry and mourn. I'm married to you, not him, and truthfully I just don't have the time or the energy to mourn him when I have to tend to the kids and the house every day."

"I want to believe you, Jessa, but I can't. After the way you blatantly lied to my face about…no, I just can't believe you right now." Shaw sighed, shaking his head at me. "Just do me the respect to shed your tears out of my sight."

I just nodded at him since I knew he wouldn't accept any words. Whatever I said he'd just ignore it and argue with it, so nodding was the safest way to go.

Shaw POV:

I loved my wife, truly I do, but I just can't handle bein' around her right now. Her betrayal hurt too much, wounded me too deep. Lookin' between the baby boy I was holding and my wife, I said, "I need a few moments alone with just me and the baby."

"Why?" Jessa asked, her dark brow arched leerily.

"I want to spend some time with my son even tho he's not really mine." I told her as I watched the ginger boy (who I prayed wouldn't grow up to be a prick like his sperm donator) sleeping in my arms. My wife's demeanor didn't lighten up, causing me to snap incredulously, "Jesus, Jessa, he's my boy too. I helped ya birth him, cut the cord, and was the first to hold him. I'm not gonna chuck him at the wall or something."

Cutting her eyes at me, she defended herself with, "I didn't say that you'd hurt him, Shaw."

"But you're implying it by your tense body language and I don't like it." I pointed out, making her aware that I knew she was thinking negative thoughts even tho she wasn't voicing them.

"Fine, I'll go into the other room while you bond with Endor." Jessa sighed before standing up and heading towards our room.

Oh god, I'm gonna have to burn that mattress and buy a new one considering who was in it and what went on. Damn and I liked that bed too.

After Jessa entered our bedroom, I looked down at the boy sleeping in my arms. A sad, half-lined smile crossed over my lips; tugging my mustache up slightly. Even tho Endor favored the man I'd just killed; he bore my name. Hell, I was the one that picked out his name. God, it just killed me that he looked so much like a McCoy, like Tolbert. I knew that I'd be getting' this kid outta dicey situations as he grew and got older. This boy's gonna be trouble…

I was shaken out of my thoughts whenever I heard the front door slam shut accompanied by my bother asking, "Where's everyone at?"

"Mary's upstairs with the kids and Jessa's resting in our room." I simply answered my brother as he took off his hat, coat, and gun; hanging them up on the wall hooks.

"Oh." He nodded, walking out of the entryway.

"I killed Tolbert McCoy tonight." I bluntly told my brother before he could reach the staircase.

"'Bout time ya did." Todd chuckled as he arrived at the stairs.

Before my brother could walked upstairs, I told him, "Mary's friendly with Billy McCoy so I want'cha to keep an eye on her when ya'll are out."

Whipping his head 'round to give me a shocked look, he sarcastically asked, "What? Oh hell, has she lost her ever lovin' mind?"

"Appears so." I nodded. "Just keep an eye on her. She's still young; might not understand the true depth and impact of the feud with the McCoys."

"I'll keep an eye on her, right after I tell her she's bein' stupid." Todd told me before storming upstairs. Oh lord, Mary's in for it now.

Lookin' down at the ginger baby in my arms, I slightly chuckled, "Endor, now you won't be consortin' with McCoy. No sir, I'll make sure of it." Endor just blinked his blue eyes and looked at me. "I'll make sure that you stay 'way from McCoys, hate 'em too." Placin' him over my shoulder and gently rubbin' circles in his back (to soothe him to sleep) I promised in a whisper, "Nobody, not even you, will ever know the truth 'bout ya bein' part McCoy. I won't let anyone know, ever, and I'd even kill to keep your secret."

Mary POV:

I was sittin' on the bed in my room with my niece and nephew on either side of me as I read them a book of fables. They really seemed to like the stories. They were snuggled up next to me, payin' attention to every sentence I said as if their lives depended on it. I'd just turned the page of my book whenever my door slammed open wit' a loud bang. I looked up only to see my brother, Todd, steppin' foot into my room wit' a deep scowl on his face. His honey eyes were burnin' a deep amber (just like Shaw's when he's angry) as he stared right thru me.

Oh no, he's pissed off at me. Shaw must've told him 'bout Billy.

Todd slammed the door shut behind him before foldin' his arms over his chest and snappin', "Shaw told me you're friendly wit' Billy fuckin' McCoy now. That's so goddamn dumb, ya know that."

"Billy's actually pretty nice if ya'd get to know him." I told my brother as a way to defend my friendship with the auburn-haired McCoy that was his age.

"He's not 'pretty nice', sissy. He's a fuckin' McCoy, those people are crazy and hateful." Todd spat at me as if he was spittin' bitters outta his mouth.

"Billy's not or at least not wit' me." I remarked since so far the auburn-haired McCoy was nice to me. Beyond nice really.

My brother's face skewed up angrily as he ordered in a deep seethe, "I don't care how he is wit'cha, you're gonna cut your friendship off like a turd an' go on livin' as if you'd never met the bastard."

Oh my god, Todd was a mini Shaw. He was actin' so much like our older bother right now that it wasn't even funny. Hmm, I wonder if he'll end up hittin' the shine bottle too? I mean I found him drainin' one in the loft after Jessa had that miscarriage last year so…

"Okay." I simply told my brother, makin' him think that I was agreein' with his demand. I had no intentions of unfriendin' Billy. I'd be 11 next month; I can make up my own mind on who my friends are. Besides, I haven't had a life of a normal girl in a long time so I don't see why I can't choose my own friends. Billy's nice to me; gets me too and I don't wanna give that up. Right now, he's more or less the only friend I got. Even the girls I know from when I used to go to school weren't that close to me, didn't care that much 'bout me either. But it seems that Billy was a good friend so far. I'd sneak 'round t'see and talk to him if I had too.

Tolbert POV:

My back ached an' my neck was throbbin' wit' a fiery pain. My eyes were heavy as I tried t'open 'em. I could hear muffled voices comin' from a distance near me. I think they sounded like my mama an' Aunt Betty. God, reckon I wasn't dead yet if I could hear them. Wait a minute, where was I if they were nearby? Wit' all the strength I had, I forced myself t'blink my eyes open.

As I opened my eyes, I was met wit' lantern light fillin' up my room at Aunt Betty's. Wonder how I got here. As I tried t'push myself up t'sit I heard my brother, Billy, holler, "Ma, Aunt Betty, he's awake!" What was he doin' 'ere?

Quickly, my ma an' aunt ran into the room. Ma rushed ov'r to my side. "Oh, Tolbert, praise be that you've pulled thru, son." She fretted an' fawned ov'er me, takin' a seat on the edge of my bed an' runnin' a hand thru my hair.

"How'd I get 'ere?" I hoarsely asked.

"Ma had one of her visions. Drug me t'yer still where we found ya passed out an' bleedin' in yer wagon. I drove ya here while mama staunched yer neck wound."

I went to put my hand on my neck (t'check the wound), but ma batted it way. "Don't touch it."

"Bullet went clean thru the side, more or less badly grazin' ya. Missed anythin' vital so you'll recover, sugar." Aunt Betty told me from her place standin' in the doorway.

"Son, in order t'protect ya the Hatfields needa think you're dead." My ma told me, takin' me by utter s'prise.

All color (well what color was left in my skin since I was wounded) drained from me as I blinked. Wide-eyed, I asked, "What?"

"Mama wants to fake yer death an' send ya off somewhere westward so ya won't be in danger or put the family in danger." Billy clarified for me as he continued to sit in a chair at my bedside.

Furrowin' my brows, I asked my mama, "Ya really think that's necessary?"

"Yes, son, I do." She nodded. Cardin' her fingers thru my messy red hair, she explained, "In order for ya t'live folks gotta believe that you're dead."

Leanin' 'gainst the doorframe, Aunt Betty told me, "Your brother's already cut boards; we'll be fillin' 'em up with sand bags so that nobody'll know no difference when the casket gets buried."

I didn't like this scheme, not one bit, but it seemed that it was a go whether I liked it or not. I just nodded 'fore sayin', "I'd like to talk wit' Billy alone. Everyone, get out."

Aunt Betty just nodded and walked out of the doorway and down the hall, but my ma didn't budge. Instead, she gave me a sad, but soft look. "But Tolbert-" Ma began to protest only for me t'hoarsely bark, "Get out, ma. I needa talk wit' Billy."

She didn't say a word, just nodded an' took her had outta my hair. She stood up an' swiftly walked outta my room, closin' the door 'hind her.

Good, now I can ask Billy 'bout Mary Eldridge. "So, I hear yer friendly wit' Mary, Shaw's lil sister."

"How'd ya hear that?" He asked, no doubt ready to deny it dependin' on my answer.

"From the horse's mouth when I went ov'r to see my son." I bluntly told my brother, causin' his face to falter.

Knowin' he couldn't deny his friendship wit' the Eldridge girl, Billy sighed, "Oh…"

"So, how'd ya end up friends?" I asked my brother, even tho it hurt my neck to talk, as I leaned 'gainst my pillows 'gainst the headboard.

"We talked at the New Year's Eve bonfire. I asked her t'keep an eye on Endor for ya an' she told me she would; then we ended up talkin'." Billy honestly answered me, causin' me to just nod my head. Shruggin', he added, "Just became friends I reckon."

"I advise ya t'be careful 'round her. She's got a crazy brother." I told Billy, gesturin' to my bandaged neck to further prove my point.

"No, she's got two crazy brothers. Todd an' me's been at it ov'r him an' Robert E. Hatfield goin' 'round Mariah Wolford."

"Ain't that Jefferson's lil sister-in-law?" I asked since I knew that my cousin was in a common-law agreement with Sarah Wolford. I was sure that Mariah was her sister, but just wanted t'make sure I was correct.

"Yep." Billy popped his tongue. "Reason why I don't want 'em 'round her. Only cause trouble."

"But yer goin' 'round Mary."

"That's different."

"Take it from me, lil brother, it ain't. Ya goin' 'round her'll cause the same trouble those Hatfields goin' 'round Mariah'll cause."

"Tolbert-" My bother began, only for me to cut him off sternly wit', "Don't Tolbert me, William McCoy." Billy cringed at the sound of his full name. Givin' him a hard look wit' my stormy eyes, I told Billy, "Take it from me, ya an' Mary's gonna cause trouble whether ya think so or not. I know cause I've been wit' somebody from the other side of this feud."

"But Mary's not a Hatfield or a Vance. 'Sides, we're just friends. Hell, she's turnin' 11 an' I'm only 13 too." Billy countered me, tryin' to give me reasons for why his situation wouldn't blow up into somethin' like mine (my complicated romance wit' Jessa).

I rolled my eyes at his foolishness. Givin' him a tilted look, I told him the hard truth of, "Her half-brother's a Vance bastard, ya remember that." Smirkin', I added in a knowin', but hoarse tone, "An' take it from me once ya'll come of age in a few years yer gonna be more then friends."

"Yer so full of horseshit." My bother scoffed, shakin' his curly auburn-haired head at me incredulously.

"If ya say so." I scoffed right back at the know-it-all teen. Damn, Billy was too much like me for his own good.

AN:

Well, that was angsty wasn't it? What do you guys think about Sally's plan for Tolbert to stay alive? How do you think Shaw and Jessa are gonna be going forward? Oh, and is Tolbert right, is Billy and Mary's friendship gonna cause trouble?

Next up, Levicy talks to Devil Anse about Cap.